What About Your Friends- TLC

What about your friends, will they stand their ground, Will they let you down again?

What about your friends, are they gonna be lowdown, Will they ever be around, Or will

they turn their backs on you?    

Every now and then, I get a little easy, I let a lot of people depend on me. I never

thought they would ever deceive me, Don't you know when times got rough, I was

standing on my own.

I'll never let another get that close to me, You see I've grown a lot smarter

now.Sometimes you have to choose and then you'll see, If your friend is true then

they'll be there with you.

Yo, is it me, or can it be I'm a little too friendly, So to speak hypothetically. Say I

supply creativity to what others must take as a form of self-hate. Only to make an

enemy which results in unfortunate destiny. They dog me out then be next to me, Just

cause I am what some choose to envy.

What about your friends, will they stand their ground, Will they let you down again?

What about your friends, are they gonna be lowdown, Will they ever be around, Or will

they turn their backs on you?

Songwriters: Dallas Austin / Lisa Nicole Lopes What About Your Friends lyrics © EMI Music Publishing, Sony/ATV Music Publishing LLC, The Royalty Network Inc., Joyce Irby D/B/A Diva One Music

Chapter 8: What About Your Friends

Michael

I can't believe Brian isn't willing to help me out with that little shit! I mean... I did most of the work with sales and shipping. All he did was draw. Okay... okay so fine, Rage wouldn't be what it is without Justin. But I'm sure that Lindsay would have been able to do just as well a job as that little asshole. Well she would be doing it, if I didn't receive these fucking papers from some guy saying that Justin filed a Cease and Desist order- whatever the fuck that meant!

And it didn't help when I called Mel and asked her to explain it. She told me that as Justin's attorney, she couldn't in good conscience talk to me but advised that I should get a good lawyer of my own. She did give me another 'free piece of advice' as she calls it, and told me not to sell or distribute anything Rage related until the matter is resolved. Well FUCK THAT and fuck them! I'll do what the hell I want!

Justin Taylor doesn't own shit; Rage is MINE!

"So what are you going to do, Baby?" Ma asks me.

She was here when that guy came in here, saying that I got served and also during the phone call with Brian. She called and tried to talk to Jennifer for me; to tell her that Justin was wrong but... Uh... Well, that didn't go over so well. Jennifer told Ma that she should let me grow up and take my punishment like a man.

Then Ma... Well, long story short, they aren't speaking right now. But that's just fine by me, since I really wasn't happy with her being friends with Jennifer Taylor anyway. "I'm going to continue on as I have been doing. Justin doesn't own anything, so he doesn't have a say in what I do."

"I beg to differ, Michael," Emmett says, since he heard what was said as he came through the door. "The fact is that you have been cheating Justin out of his money. Ted and I warned you about your penchant for never reading the fine print of a contract."

"What the fuck are you talking about?! Rage was MY idea! All Justin did was draw for it, which is something anyone else could have done!"

"Sure, if you were willing to pay them up front. But we know that you are cheap, Michael, even more so than Ted. Well, unless it's other people's dough you are spending, then you're a veritable imitation of Millburn Pennybags."

What the fuck is this? Pick on Michael Day? Well fuck that, too! But I don't have to defend myself since Ma is already starting in on Emmett's comment. "Michael is not cheap, Emmett! Perhaps if you were a little more cheap, you wouldn't be borrowing money from him all the time."

Emmett laughs. "Michael, when have I ever borrowed money from you that I haven't paid back almost the second I borrowed it? Tell me, so I can pay it back right now," he says, taking out his wallet.

I look away, not wanting to discuss this in front of my mother. But she's insistent. "Tell him, Michael! Tell him how you came to me to ask for the money to keep you and him from being evicted last week. Emmett, you owe Michael for that! If it wasn't for him, the landlord would have put you out. Right, Michael?"

Emmett

I'm standing here watching as Michael's eyes shift back and forth, as if trying to find a way to escape his lies. Sorry Mikey, but there is no escape from the tangled web of your own making; not on my watch! It's time Debbie knows that we were never in danger of being evicted. Although I don't exactly know what Michael used the money for, it certainly didn't go towards the rent. Which I paid, and Michael still owes me for.

"So, Michael, would you like to answer your mother, or should I?" I waited for a few moments, trying to give him a chance to come clean of his own accord, even while Debbie is still squawking and demanding that Michael tells me what he told her last week. I finally couldn't take it anymore so I say, "Debbie, I don't know what Michael told you, but we were never in danger of being evicted. I paid the rent on our place for the next three months, two weeks ago. I had just done a fabulous party for a friend of mine and received my fee, plus a hefty bonus. So I had my own cash, and didn't want to squander it. Although truthfully, I did see this darling outfit at my day job that I am dying to get, which will happen sometime in the near future. Ted has been working with me on my finances, because I asked him to. I'm hoping to get my side business fully off the ground soon. So no, I didn't borrow money from Michael here... In fact, he borrowed it from me. The question we should both be asking is: what the money he borrowed was used for?"

I watch as his eyes well up with tears, while he looks at me dumbfounded and a little hurt. Frankly after what Brian and I talked about in the company of Jennifer Taylor this afternoon, this troubles me to no end. I am so pissed off on Justin's behalf that I can spit fire and chew nails! What's worse is that instead of getting all the facts, Debbie is once again blindly siding with Michael, as if Justin is the one who was wrong. I suppose that's because she isn't aware of what her ‘baby' has really been up to, so she wouldn't know how many of his spun tales are fact or what's fiction.

"Well, Michael... what exactly did you use my money for?" Debbie asks again, as Michael shakes his head in disbelief that she actually has the audacity to ask. 

"I ran behind on some bills," he says quietly, but Debbie isn't letting up.

I, for one, don't feel bad one damn ounce for giving her my part of the story. I keep thinking that if we all did this before, instead of letting Michael play innocent or victim, maybe she wouldn't be so quick to think the worst of us, while protecting her offspring from his own bullshit.

"Come on, Baby. You can tell me," she tries to wheedle him, and it's all I can do not to vomit up my Crabcakes and Cosmos from lunch.

"You might as well tell her, Michael," I say. "I mean, you're already in the hole for hoarding over 80% of the Rage profits all for yourself. So what could you possibly need money for, since your business- the Rage side that is- is doing so well. Even without Justin's share of the money, the sales would have allowed you to take care of everything, and still have some money left over."

"Wait! What did you say, Emmett?" Debbie asks me. "How much is Justin asking Michael to pay back?"

"Roughly about two hundred, but that doesn't include the most recent sales from last night."

"Justin is pitching a bitch over two hundred dollars?! I can't believe this shit," Debbie rants, before I stop her.

"No, Deb. Justin is 'pitching a bitch' as you say, over two hundred THOUSAND dollars."

"WHAT? I can't believe a comic is worth that much money," Deb screeches.

"But it's not just the comic, is it, Michael?" At his continued silence, I tell Deb what she really doesn't know. "It's everything Rage-related: comic books, dolls, t-shirts, sweatshirts, notebooks, book bags, coffee mugs, Halloween costumes, jackets, phone cases and key chains. Oh, and let's not forget the video game being developed, or the actual website which does business all times of the day and night, as well as the copyrights to both the story and artwork. With gay marriage becoming legal here in the U.S. it's no longer an underground, naughty thing to have. Rage has gone global in a very short time, which if you think about it is simply amazing. Justin's story is a major draw and the artwork in it is worthy of the masters.

"In short, Michael has been cheating Justin out of money since the very beginning, acting as some sort of puppet master. I hate to be the one to tell you this, Deb, but that kind of greed adds up. And your baby boy here is either going to have to pay up, or lose everything. Even if he wanted to get another artist to draw Rage, Justin holds the copyright. So none of the characters that are there now could be used as a blueprint without his express permission."

I watch Debbie's stunned face as she processes what I've told her. Michael is still looking down at the counter, refusing to face me or his mother. "I thought you said that Justin didn't own anything."

Again, I feel compelled to answer Deb. "Hell yeah. He basically owns Michael's ass. The artwork and web design are Justin's alone. And what's funny is, that all of this was explained to Michael before he even signed the contract. But in his arrogance and pettiness, Michael never really verified what the fine print said. Did you, Michael?"

"It was just a bunch of bullshit that no one understands," Michael sneered.

"Now that's not true and you know it, since Melanie explained it to you. Basically she told you that the bold print on any contract gives you things, but the fine print takes them away. No, your problem was that you didn't think that Justin would ever notice; that he would be fine with the crumbs you threw at him. You fucked up when you decided to ruin his relationship with Brian."

"Is that what this is about?" Debbie screeched again.

"Not exactly, but I wouldn't blame Justin if it was a vendetta of some sort. It's no secret that Michael was between Brian and Justin more than he was present in his own relationship with Ben, and even before that while Michael was still doing Doctor David. But this is about business, Deb. Do you know that Justin went to his father to ask for the money to continue on at PIFA?"

"Oh my God, poor Sunshine. I can just about imagine what that meeting was like. Michael, if you and Justin were making money hand-over-fist like that, why didn't you give him his money?"

I'm glad that Debbie is beginning to see what her son has really been up to. She, Ben, and Vic have all told her nosy, interfering offspring to stay out of Brian and Justin's problems numerous times. But Michael never listens! And because he doesn't, I still can't help but be a little pissed at Michael on Justin's behalf. So yeah, there is no more sympathy for his pathetic ass left within me!

"Go on, Michael. Tell her why not," I goad. "Tell her that it was your intention that Justin babysits Gus for Lindsay while she draws Rage. Tell your mom how you were punishing Justin for leaving Brian, even though you worked your ass off to make that happen. Oh and let's not forget that you were pissed at Justin for having a relationship with Brian, in the first place.  But let's move on to let your mother know what she really wants to know, shall we? Do tell her what you have done with ALL the money: both the money I supposedly owe you, and what you have squandered Justin's share of the profits on. Deb, doesn't the store look good?"

Debbie looked around, noticing all the little changes inside of Red Cape Comics as if seeing it for the first time. And perhaps she is. There is new lighting over the pristine glass cabinets, with shiny new locks to house Michael's collectibles. The counter is now marble and the windows as well as the flooring are completely new. The place still smells of fresh paint, which Michael had done while he was in Florida and Las Vegas for the latest Comic Cons.

So Debbie wants to know where her money has gone, does she? It went to a few new items that are being proudly displayed in the second half-full area, behind the counter. Well, I hope that Michael is prepared to lose all of this soon, because I highly doubt that he has much money left. And since Justin put a ‘Cease and Desist' order up, Michael is powerless to recoup any of Justin's money. There's no way in hell the store can provide the influx of cash with the ratatat and claptrap he sells outside of Rage.

"Yeah, now that you mention it, Emmett, the place is really looking amazing and... Wait a minute! Is this where Justin's money has gone? Is it?! Answer me, Michael!" She yells at him, and slaps him upside the head.

"Owww... okay! Yes, some of it has gone into improving MY store." 

"And the rest? Where the fuck is the rest?!"

"Gone! That's all you need to know," Michael whines, crossing his arms over his chest and pouting. I have never wanted to slap him more in our lives as friends than I do in this moment.

"Fuck that! You will answer me, Michael or so help me God, you will never ever get another penny from me even if you're evicted in just your Captain Astro underwear! Now, where the fuck is Justin's money?!"

He appeared to be thinking about what she was really telling him, before he exhaled a deep sigh. "Fine. The rest of it was used for my business trips, and to up the package with the publisher. Since Rage is doing so well, we needed to increase printing. Justin would never understand how much it costs to actually run a business. He's just a greedy little kid with no responsibilities to anyone, but himself. Meanwhile, I incur expenses just to open the store daily. Plus Ben and I are thinking about buying a house. So I needed money for my share of the down payment."

"So let me get this straight... you are sacrificing Justin for your life with Ben?" she asks him.

Michael shrugged. "Why not, since he sacrificed Brian's life in exchange for Ethan?" And then he stopped, realizing what he just said. "I didn't mean that. I... I..." He barely ducked out of the way when Debbie's hand swung out again. "You can't be hitting me, Ma. I'm over thirty!"

"When you act like you're that old, I'll stop hitting you like I did when you were five! Now you listen to me, you little asshole. You get Justin's money, and you get it fast! Do you know how much fucking trouble you're in?! What if Justin really makes good on pressing charges against you? You could do time in jail, all because you were- ARE- being a fucking idiot!"

Michael snickered then. "Justin would never do that. Not if he wants Brian back, he won't."

I couldn't help but chime in then. "What is that supposed to mean, Michael?"

"We all know that Boy Wonder can't think for himself." Michael answered.

"I will never know where you got that idea, especially since he's suing you for fucking with him. Brian has nothing to do with this."

"Oh, come on. You really expect me to believe that?!" Michael sneered.

"It doesn't matter what I believe. But since I just know he was the first person you called after getting the summons, what did Mr. Kinney say?" I noticed how Michael looked away again, but it was Debbie who answered me.

"He told my dumbass son here that he wasn't going to talk to Justin on Michael's behalf, or get involved in any way."

"Did you believe him, Deb?"

She chewed her bottom lip for a moment, before she spoke again. "Brian Kinney is many things, but a liar isn't one of them. I almost feel sorry for him because my idiotic son has put him in the middle of all this."

"What are you talking about?! He isn't even seeing Justin anymore! In fact, no one has seen that little shit for months," Michael added, although I really wish he would shut the hell up. He just keeps pissing me off, but again I am saved from answering.

"That doesn't mean he doesn't care about him anymore, Michael. Really? I wonder who you are right now. I know I raised you better than this."

"Ma..."

"Don't you ‘Ma' me, Michael. You find a way to fix this shit, because now I fully understand why your best friend wants to stay out of it. Too bad you couldn't be bothered to do the same when it came to him and Justin."

I followed Deb out of Red Cape Comics, hellbent on not being alone with Michael right now. Fortunately for me, I got a call to plan another party. So while Deb heads to the Diner, I'm on my way to the Schickle estate. Had that call come in earlier, I might have been able to ask Brian to extend my use of his car service. I'll call him later though, and fill him in on all the details of the afternoon.

I know that it won't help him, and Baby get back together. But in lieu of our conversation this morning, it may help set his mind and heart at ease. Poor Brian. With friends like Michael and Lindsay, who the hell needs enemies? I just hope that whatever happens, Brian and Justin find their way back to each other.

They are both just so fucking miserable otherwise.

Daphne

I really am concerned about Justin. The fact that he didn't go home last night but wouldn't tell me, of all people, where he was, speaks volumes. But without proof, I dare not even hint at my suspicions. I can only hope that he has somehow come to his senses and left that phony arrogant asshole to go back to the Original. Brian Kinney.

The thing about Brian that I most admired- and still do- is that he owns his shit. There's none of that ‘well it was his fault', or ‘her fault', or ‘I wasn't aware of what I was doing' bullshit. Whereas he may not be completely honest with himself, he sure as hell is honest about himself. Ethan Gold- pretentious jackass extraordinaire- is a different matter altogether. Countless times I've asked Justin what the fuck he was doing with the little bastard, and he would always tell me ‘Daph, I'm not doing anything... yet.'

That right there was a clear indication to me that Ethan was trying some twinkie-la-la bullshit on Justin.

So there is no way I can sit here, and not regret that I didn't run straight to Brian and tell him that both he and Justin were being fools. This is the first time that I was honestly caught between my loyalty to my best friend, and my constantly growing friendship with Brian. I knew that Justin was headed for emotional trouble... And I said nothing. So really, what kind of friend does that make me?

"Hey, what are you over there thinking about?" Phoebe, a mutual friend of mine, Justin, and Ethan asks me.

Ironically, Phebes went to school with Justin and me, but it wasn't until after the bashing that she and I became solid friends. It turns out that she was a volunteer at Allegheny General for over a year before Justin was attacked. So when she heard about what Hobbs had done to Justin, she would spend as many hours visiting him as I would, getting things for Mrs. Taylor and me so that we could watch Justin's therapies or visit with him. She also helped the nurses on duty with him when the moments in the hospital became intense. Our friendship solidified the day that fucking Michael had returned from Portland and he had shown up at the hospital.

The condescending way he spoke to Justin when he'd asked for Brian still burns my ass. ‘You don't need to worry about where he is, Justin. The fact is that Brian isn't coming, so you need to concentrate on getting better so you can move on.'

I wanted to deck the motherfucker for saying that. We had all been in the same situation with Justin, but knew enough about his reactions to redirect his thoughts with a follow-up question. Michael had been told to do the same, but what did he do? He deliberately goaded Justin, while seeming to look innocent in the process. God, I hate him! I always have hated him for the way he treated Justin. And I still do! But first, it's time to answer Phebes.

"I was just thinking about this mess with Brian, Justin, and Ethan." I said, before taking a sip of my coffee. "I just don't understand what Justin is thinking."

"Ethan was pretty upset that he couldn't find Justin last night," she tells me. "He sounded really worried when he called me to find out if I had seen him."

I couldn't help the breath that huffed out in response to her statement. "Trust me when I tell you, it wasn't Justin's well-being that he was concerned about."

"How do you know that?"

"Phoebe, if there is one reason for Ethan Gold to worry, it is the possibility that Justin has wised up and is talking with Brian again."

"Why would he, though? Ethan told me that Justin left Brian because he was a whore and a shitty boyfriend."

I nearly choked on my drink when I heard what that little shit had said about Brian. "Let's get this straight... Brian is a slut, not a whore; there is a big difference. He doesn't get paid to fuck, although from what I hear they really should begin a cover charge for the Backroom of Babylon, since Brian is a regular in there. But he fucks for the pure enjoyment of it. Besides, that particular thought of Ethan's isn't true. And Brian wasn't a shitty boyfriend to Justin. Emotionally stunted, yes. But shitty? Not at all!"

"Ethan said that he constantly cheated on Justin," Phoebe tells me, as if it is already fact.

"No. He never cheated on Justin. In fact, it was Justin who ended up cheating. They have- had- an open-relationship. So it's not cheating if the other person knows in advance about your sexual exploits with other people. The core of the rules were: no kissing others on the mouth, no names or numbers exchanged with tricks and you can't fuck a trick more than once. Justin broke all of those. And although I hate that he did, I also understand why he did it. Justin hasn't been... the same, since the bashing."

"He looks fine to me. But why would Ethan lie to me about something like this? He and I are as close as you and Justin. Even though I'm friends with all of you, I've known Ethan since we were seven years old. He has no reason to lie to me. Maybe you've just misinterpreted how things really were between Justin and Brian."

I bristled a little at that. I mean I could understand her loyalty to that violin-playing pain in the ass, since I feel the same way about Justin. But I draw the line at someone telling me that I don't know my friends, simply on the word of someone who has the abject need to make himself look good. Which he isn't! Time for me to burst that little fucking bubble of 'Ethan Says' right now! "Phoebe, let me tell you exactly how Brian and Justin's relationship- or non-relationship as they tend to call it- went..."

And for the next half an hour, I tell her everything I know from beginning to end. Most of it was from what I observed between the two of them, so that I wouldn't betray any of Justin's confidences. But most of all, I told her what she had witnessed at the prom, and how Brian had come to be there in the first place. That night was supposed to be a declaration to Justin. But in the end, it went tragically wrong.

I told her about Justin's recovery, the part that she didn't see after he left the hospital. I spoke of how Brian put himself at emotional risk while he was trying to help Justin recover his memory. I told her of their fuck-ups and Justin's insecurity. And then I told her exactly what was going on with Justin, strictly from my point-of-view. By the time I finished, she undoubtedly had a clearer picture of what it was like to be the friend of Brian and Justin, pre-Ethan.

"Wow! I mean, I knew some of that, but Ethan was vague on many of the details even though I knew when he and Justin began spending more time together. He made it sound as if he was trying to save Justin from an emotionally abusive relationship."

"Ethan would make it sound like he was some sort of hero, because if he was completely honest, he would have to own up to deliberately going after someone who was in a relationship. Which was something he knew, by the way," I couldn't keep the sneer from my voice. It still fucks with my nerves to think of all Ethan did to get Justin, and the fact that Justin bought the bullshit. Before she or I could continue our conversation, Justin had arrived.

"Hey. What are you two gossiping about?" He asked, as he took his seat next to me. 

"You. And you look like shit, by the way. So, where have you been or should I be asking who have you been with?" I respond.

Justin took his own sip of coffee, and I couldn't help but notice the tremble in his right hand as he did so. It was different than it usually is if he had overworked it. Something was up.  He sighed before answering, "I saw Brian this morning while I was down at the triangle. He'd had lunch with my mom."

"What was that about?" Again, the sip of hot liquid. I know that he's stalling for time and honestly, it makes me want to knock the cup out of his hand so that he can concentrate on answering my questions immediately, instead of taking his time to formulate the answer. He's been doing that so much lately that it's beginning to get unnerving. "Justin, answer the question. Why were your mom and Brian meeting?"

"Okay... okay," he says, and lets out this long-suffering sigh. "It turns out that they were there to discuss the situation with Michael. Emmett was there too, although I'm not sure why. But you might as well know that I'm suing the fucker. Brian had Mel and Ted go over the contract and account books for Rage yesterday. The fucker has been cheating me big time."

Phoebe chimed in. "Why? I thought you guys were friends, so why would Michael do something like that to you? Surely he knew that it was illegal."

Justin laughed, but there wasn't any humor in the sound. In fact, it sounded hurt, angry, and bitter. I had only heard that sound once before when we were in Woody's just after Brian had canceled the trip to Vermont, having to go to Chicago on a business trip. We didn't find out until much later that it was in order to keep his job. But anyway...

I had said to him that regardless of how it looked or what Brian said or didn't say, that he really loved Justin. Justin, in turn, laughed bitterly telling me that ‘Brian doesn't love me; he likes to fuck me, but he doesn't love me.' That sound sent a chill up my spine then, as it does now. And judging by the state of his affairs right now, I don't like it.

"Whether it was illegal or not, in Michael's mind, any way to punish me while he's benefitting from it is the right thing to do. I would say that this started as a result of my break-up with Brian, but I would be wrong since it was being done from the very beginning."

"What are you talking about?" I ask him, because prior to this whole Ethan fiasco, things seemed on the up and up where Rage was concerned. There was a contract and Justin had done all he could to make it succeed, including starting the website using money from three months worth of tips when he worked at the Diner.

"I trusted that Michael had honor, which was a huge mistake on my part. So I didn't bother to check behind him. I fucking should have, since he's been pocketing over 80% of sales since all things Rage began. I just thought that since it was a new comic, it was taking time to grow. How stupid of me."

I reached out to touch his hand. The look on his face is completely hurt and dejected; a far cry from the Justin Taylor that I know and love. "You weren't stupid, Justin. Maybe a little naive when it came to accepting supposed olive branches given by someone, who was just as invested in the comic as you were. But no, you weren't stupid. So what is the plan now?"

"I'm taking the fucking store."

"That's a bit extreme, isn't it?" Phoebe asks him. "That's his livelihood, Justin."

The frown in his eyes spoke volumes, even before he lowered his voice in a very controlled manner. "He's taken everything from me Phebes- more than you could know or could understand."

"Is this just some revenge about Brian?"

Phoebe really needs to shut up! She has no idea about the can of verbal whoopass she is about to open up. But I am surprised by Justin's answer, although I probably shouldn't be. "I will not deny that revenge is part of it, but there is more. With the money that Michael had been willingly withholding from me, I could have been fairly independent by now. I certainly wouldn't have been living with Ethan."

"What exactly does that mean? I thought you were happy living there with him. And you bought a jeep, so obviously you are doing pretty well."

He stared at her for a little longer than necessary. I could tell that he was keeping an iron-clad control on his temper, even if she can't. But in all fairness, she really doesn't understand Justin's way of living before and while with Brian, to what he's currently living in now. I don't know that he is in the mood to explain the difference either. Again, he surprised me by answering her in a reasonably calm tone.

"I bought the jeep out of necessity. Sure I can walk to work, but it takes over forty-five minutes to do so. In inclimate weather, it takes even longer. I can also take the bus, but that isn't something that I want to do. Been there, done that, don't need any reminders of what that was like. So I decided that filling up the gas tank, and paying the insurance would save me money. Plus it is a tax write-off, so it's just good business.

"As far as living with Ethan... the thing is that there are times when I just need my space, and Ethan likes to hover. I hate that I have to share a shower with all the other residents on the floor and that there is never enough hot water when I get there. It also feels like I have more value to Ethan as a live-in housekeeper, since he is probably the messiest person I have ever lived with, including my sister. In short, I need to have my own place now."

I couldn't sit there, and not ask the question that I'm dying to know. Justin just doesn't look well-rested to me. "Are the nightmares back?" He startles at the question, and I know that I'm right.

"They are."

"You know how to cure them again, don't you?"

Justin nods at me even as he says, "I can't go back there, Daph. You and I both know that, so I have to learn to manage them on my own. But I will not ask anyone's permission to have a fucking meltdown after them. Nor will I sit idly and be told that I need to get over them and simply go back to sleep, or be given a host of other suggestions that would make me so overtired that I don't dream."

I couldn't help but gasp at what he was telling me. "He said those things?"

"That and more. But I don't want to talk about it anymore, okay?"

I look him in the eyes, and I know what he's telling me. Phoebe can unintentionally be a dicta-bird when it comes to Ethan. Again, I can't fault her for her loyalty but I also understand that Justin needs his privacy, especially regarding these particular nightmares... And the only man, who has ever been able help him through it.

"So you're suing Michael?"

"I am if he doesn't come up with the money."

"How much?" both Phebes and I asks him.

"Let's just say that I would have never gone to see Craig Taylor about paying my tuition for the semester, if I had my fair share of Rage."

"What the hell? Michael must be off his fucking rocker! Not only that, but where is he going to get the money to pay you back? I'm almost willing to bet that he spent it on toys. I can't believe that Ben is with that... That..."

"Child," Justin supplies for me, even though I know both he and I would use far more colorful phrases to describe that whiny fuck. "Phoebe, don't tell Ethan about this, okay?"

"Why not? I'm sure he would want to help you through this," she suggests.

Again, that bitter laugh springs forth, with the same result resonating within me. I take it upon myself to explain it to her to spare Justin from having to be nice. "Phebes, I hate to break it to you, but Ethan is a jealous, spiteful, and manipulative asshole. Anything that brings Justin into contact with what he considers Justin's former older friends is a cause for contention between them. Now you wouldn't want to be the source of Ethan becoming a clingy, judgmental, scheming twit, would you?" Contrary to her own unpopular belief, Ethan is all those things and more. But I'll let her live in parts of her delusion for the sake of her own sanity... For now, at least.

"Daphne, he just loves Justin so much. I'm sure that if Justin would tell him he would..."

"No, he won't," Justin tells her. "Ethan and Michael are the reasons I stopped working at a place where I was established since high school. They made it so uncomfortable for me to live as normally as I could, in a place that has always represented safety for me. Ethan and Michael- both jealous and manipulative for different reasons- forced me to choose between them and myself. They still do and I'm tired of it! I know that you don't really understand everything; hell I don't understand everything either. But please keep this to yourself.

"Besides, above all Ethan has the Heifetz coming up and you have auditions for yourself, too. So concentrate on that, not my problems. If everything goes well for both of you, this will be but a pebble in the pond, and long forgotten amid all the excitement. So if you won't keep my secrets for me, then do it for Ethan. This competition means so much to him. He doesn't need the added stressof my life to distract him from achieving his goals."

And me too, Justin didn't say, but I heard it anyway. I can tell that what Justin said had finally broken through her innocently stubborn, see-the-best-in-everyone psyche. If it ever came down to brass tacks, I know that she would choose Ethan over Justin any day, since I would do the same for Justin.

"Okay," Phoebe promised him, and I could see the relief flow through Justin.

Now if only I can find a way to get my two favorite men back together, all would be right in my own world.   

Melanie

She's been on the fucking phone with that whiny bastard for over an hour. I keep sitting here at the dining room table, going over these legal briefs, and pretending not to notice the looks of disappointment and the angry daggers shooting my way whenever Michael tells her something else involving business that is NOT hers or his. I don't know who Lindsay thinks she's fooling, but it certainly isn't me! The bottom line is that I can't discuss this with her since Justin is paying me... Or better yet Brian is, but she doesn't need to know that.

What she and Michael need to understand is that just because Justin doesn't come around anymore, does not mean that we ALL wrote him out of our lives.

I don't know the full story yet, but from the bits and pieces I garnered to make some sense of what I am understanding to be a farce of a break-up, Michael and Lindsay have a lot of nerve and a lot to answer for. I nearly fucking decked her yesterday, when she suggested that Justin should be Gus' babysitter while she drew Rage. I mean, what the hell?! I love Lindz- I really do- but she doesn't have even a tenth of the talent housed inside of her entire being that Justin has just within his pinky nail. I was more than happy to review the contract that I had written up between Justin and Michael, if for no other reason than to keep Lindsay from embarrassing herself.

Investigating Michael's part in this... well that's a different story.

First, let me issue a disclaimer: I don't hate Michael. Sure, he is immature and can be extremely clingy and territorial of Brian, even though I can't imagine why. But outside of those qualities, I would like to think that he had inherited the caring spirit he tends to display, from his mother. The problem is that within the last twenty-four hours, my professional opinion of him is warring with everything he presents to the world. How exactly did Michael think that Justin wouldn't notice the missing money sooner rather than later, especially with everything going on between him and Brian?

It truly boggles the mind, especially if you know Justin Taylor! But maybe that's really the problem. Michael and Lindsay are guilty of just seeing a kid, while the rest of us have really gotten to meet and respect the intelligence behind his innocent facade. Hell, he would have had to be intelligent to keep Brian dancing to his tune. Whether it was obvious to Justin or not, those of us who viewed them without the jaundiced eyes of the two unbest best friends saw it. 

But that critical piece of BJ History is less important right now than the situation at hand. The fact is that Michael is either really smart, or he's really, REALLY stupid with an extraordinary mean streak. I'm leaning more towards the latter, and that is truly what's worrying me. Because of this, I now even find myself worrying for Ben, even if I don't know him very well. Michael is not only acting like a child throwing a tantrum, but he's also acting a lot like a scorned lover.

This is the kind of shit divorce attorneys cream over: a jealous ex- be it husband or wife- who basically cleaned out their ex's bank account, to keep the next lover from getting a penny of it. Only this shit is happening in reverse! Michael withheld many thousands of dollars, seemingly in punishment for Justin having a relationship with Brian in the first place. What the fuck? I mean, is Brian Kinney a bridge where the troll named Michael Novotny mandates payment before the billy goat named Justin can get to him?

Or maybe Brian is a prime piece of waterfront real estate, where the fees to build on him are so astronomical that no one except Justin would be willing to jump through all sorts of hoops to own him? Not that Justin would ever try to own Brian in the way Michael and Lindsay would love to mind, but... Whichever metaphor it is, I can tell you one thing, this has the vindictive mark of not only Michael Novotny, but Lindsay Peterson, written all over it.

"Mel, how could you? Michael is our friend."

"So is Justin," I answer her, without looking up from my work.

"Michael was our friend first, Melanie. I don't think that you should have involved yourself."

I look up then, because I can't believe that she is really trying to reprimand me for number one: doing my job, and number two: calling Michael on his bullshit. "Well since Justin is paying me, and has been paying a retainer fee to me since going into business with Michael, I can honestly say that I don't give a damn what you or Michael think. Not only that, but I really don't have to discuss this with you since it is against the law. If I were you, I would at least try to hear both sides of the story before I side with one over the other."

"Like you're doing?" she huffs sarcastically, crossing her arms over her chest.

"Not really Lindz, since I actually know both sides of the story."

"How? You wouldn't even talk to Michael. You just told him that he isn't allowed to continue his business."

Does she really think I don't know what she's doing? I can sling guilt just as much as she can. Hell, I was born Jewish and no one does guilt quite like the females of my culture. "Nice try, Lindz. But you are forgetting a few details. Number one: I drew up the contract between them so I know what it says. Number two: I did give Michael some free legal advice, as his friend. And number three, which is probably going to get your thong twitching further up your ass, is that this doesn't concern you. Or does it?"

"What is that supposed to mean, Melanie? I was just lending a comforting ear to a friend in need."

I giggled. "Sure you were, Lindsay, and I don't doubt that you thought you were. By chance, did Michael mention how much he owes Justin?" I'm seriously curious about this.

"Of course, he did! And two hundred thousand dollars is outrageous for a mere comic book."

I outright laughed then. "You know, you should really do some research before you pick a side, Lindsay. Although I can't discuss the entire case with you and I won't, I will tell you that your ass is getting away fucking lucky that you aren't being included in the lawsuit. I know that you are the true fucking puppet master, pulling Michael's strings; I've watched you long enough to know the signs. But you see, you two miscalculated just how intelligent Justin Taylor really is. There was a reason that he didn't go to Dartmouth..."

"Yeah. Brian," she sneered.

"Showing your true feelings much, Lindsay? Careful! Your WASP mask is going to slip and everyone will see how mean and vindictive you can actually be."

"Oh come on, Melanie! What's with the accusations?"

"Just calling it as I see it, Lindsay. But for the record, Justin didn't go to Dartmouth because he didn't need a business degree. Justin was, and is fully capable of taking care of his own affairs just fine."

She huffs, derisively. "You mean Brian is."

I shook my head. She and Michael really do have one-track minds when it comes to Brian Kinney. Sadly, it extends to Justin, which is grossly unfair considering he once considered them both friends. "Let me explain something to you, Lindz, and I want you to really hear me. Justin graduated at the top of his class. Of course, he was unable to attend his graduation thanks to a sociopath with a bat. But that's beside the point. Justin is one of the most intelligent people that of all of us, including Brian, know. Yes he is, and even though you and Michael discount Brian and Justin's relationship as strictly sex, I highly doubt that was the case. I sincerely doubt that he would have been able to score 1500 on his Scholastic Aptitude Test the FIRST time he took it, simply by blowing or riding Brian's cock as you and Michael seem to think. Justin once told me that Brian helped him study all the time, and from that score alone, I believe it. Brian doesn't half-ass his way through life, so it would stand to reason that he wouldn't be attracted to ANYONE who did!

"You know, for someone who claims to love and know Brian, you and Michael tend to forget why I fucking hate him sometimes. It's not only because of his lifestyle, but the fact that the man is so fucking smart! He's basically a man who was born with both beauty and brains, which is something that most aspire to, including me. What I would have had to work my entire ass off for, seems to come so effortlessly to Brian. And it does for Justin Taylor, as well. So, both of you may like to think that Brian is pulling Justin's strings, but the fact is that he isn't. Again, you should be happy that other than offering Michael sad and selfish advice, Justin is not suing you, too. My advice to you is to be thankful for that, and stay the fuck out of Michael's orbit. You don't want to crash and burn with him."

With that last sentence, I get up from the dining room table and collect my stuff. I need to get out of the house for awhile, so I also pack my briefcase. It's not that I'm going to the office; it's that I know Lindsay. She is dying to learn the full terms of Justin and Michael's contract. She can fucking keep guessing because no matter where she searches within the house, she'll never find it since it isn't here.

But I know that won't stop her from looking.

Lindsay is a lot like Michael, only more intelligent and manipulative. Well, Michael and Lindsay are probably going to blow a fuse, when they learn what Brian is up to next. And the fact that Ted and I know before they do, will be cause enough for them to throw their three-year-old tantrums. But to know that there are others involved, including the Taylors and Emmett, well that is going to cause their heads to explode. Is it terrible that I can't wait for that to happen?

As I listen to Lindsay, issuing threats and orders from the front porch as I'm backing out of the driveway, I really can't feel anything but exuberance at the idea that I know something she doesn't know. Yep, being with Lindsay while listening to Michael screeching on the phone for over an hour has officially turned me into a ten-year old, which is alright since my partner and her friend have the mentalities of five-year-olds.