I sat down in front of my computer, trying to get the courage to contact Justin again... after so long. He must be starting his second semester of his first year now. Winter break over by now. It felt so strange. I never am the one yo chase, I am normally the one being chased. But I couldn't expect that now... not after I broke his heart... over and over again. I literally spoke him enough to get the hell out of his city! His home... I took a deep breath and pushed myself to do something I never thought of doing... let someone else see me vulnerable, desperate.

(10:00)

Hi. 

It's me, Brain. 

How's New York treating you?

Prat is a good school or is it all talk?

Twenty minutes later, not one answer came through, I had to continue working. So, I decided to check my chat later- when I get back to the loft, surely.

(18:00)

I've staring talking to Alex. 

(18:10)

The psychologist.                           

(18:15)                           

I know who the fuck is Alex

How did you get this contact?!

I don't think I've ever felt so relieved before! I haven't smiled so wide... or at all, until now- not since he left. However, I didn't have the time to enjoy it completely. I had to answer rapidly, didn't want him to think twice of finally answering me.

(18:16)

Daphne. 

Don't blame her. 

You know how insistent I am when I want something.                           

(18:18)                           

I really don't

After all, you never wanted me

(18:19)

I did.

I do, Sunshine.                             

(18:24)                           

Lose this contact

I sighed and plumped against the headboard of the bed, he's not even online anymore! At least, he answered. That's more than I expected from him... at least on the first day. Well, tomorrow will be a brand new day and another opportunity. I will win him over, that's for sure. After all, I am a Kinney and we always get what we want.

(10:00)

I quit from Vanguard.

(10:10)

Why?

(10:10)

Because I cannot sell my principles for a man who hates my guts and sexuality.

(10:11)

Not that

But it's good to know that you have your priorities straight

Morals before profit

I was asking, why all of the suddenly are you opening up with me?

(10:12)

Because you were right.

You never really knew me, and that's not fair.

To any of us.

(10:15)

Good

What are you going to do now that you don't have a job?

(10:16)

I am not jobless, Sunshine.

Cynthia is helping me start my own advertising company.

Maybe I'll add Ted later, he is very good with taxes.

(10:21)

Your dream come true

I'm happy for you

(10:21)

Are you happy?

Like, for yourself?

(10:30)

Getting there

After that he was gone again. He really had to stop doing that. But then again, I couldn't expect him to just receive me with open arms. At least, I could say that we are off to a good beginning. Now I have to start working, if I want to beat Vanguard I have to move fast. I grabbed my phone and called Mother Taylor, she got her license as a relator, and was the only one I could trust to not screw me over and do an efficient job. Also, we kind of bonded over our depression after Justin left for New York.  

10:00

I discussed with the munchers the living arrangements of Gus.

That had a quick response, not even a minute had to pass before Justin answered. That meant that he had to be waiting for my daily chat with him... things are looking up.

10:00

  Really?!

 When?

What did they say?

10:01

It was over Christmas, hoped that the Holliday spirit might make them more susceptible to my request. It didn't work as planned.

10:02

It wasn't the smartest move you could have made.

10:02

Twat!

I smiled, happy that things were falling perfectly on place. We were returning to feel comfortable around each other, at least enough for us to banter.

10:03

So, the girls aren't up for the change?

10:03

Not, really.

At least, not at the beginning.

It took me a couple of weeks, my lawyer and a very insistent Lindsay- that loved the idea that I wanted to be a present paternal figure to our son.

At the end, Smelly Mel finally signs the papers that stipulated that I have Gus over every other weekend and a month during summer vacations.

I should thank you, Justin.

This time it took him more time to answer. I noticed that it always happens when I do something uncharacteristically. As if, he tried to compose himself to not do something rush and irrational.

10:08

Why?

I didn't do anything

  It was all you

10:09

You stopped me from giving up my rights, that's what made this possible.

So, thank you Sunshine.

I smiled again when the reply was delayed, liking the fact that even miles apart, I was still able to affect him. 

10:13

Something tells me that Mel, isn't as in favor of this father and son bonding as you put it

What did she ask you?

Sly twat! Changing the topic, to deviate the attention from his embarrassment, and getting revenge on me, by taking me off balance this time. I thought, strangely proudly at this strong Sunshine. This time I was the one that hesitated before answering, but knew that if I really wanted things to work between us I needed to start being open.

10:20

I had to promise to stop taking drugs, reduce my doses of alcohol to two glassed a day- three if the day was rough- and start stopping the disgusting and unhealthy habit that is smoking.

They know I never break my word, so they didn't ask me for monthly alcohol and drug tests.

"If you want to be a father to my son, you cannot die with him because of stupid life choices you made", those were the words Mel used to justify these demands.

Which were, surprisingly, said in a concerned tone. Even though, she tried to hide it.

10:21

She cares about you, in her own way

 Just like you care about her, in your own way

 Your fights are more like siblings complaining about how annoying the other is, you both always reminded me of Molly and me

The only time you both really fought, was over Gus

And that's only because Mel has always been afraid of people taking her son away from her, just because there is no blood relation- it has never had anything to do with you

 I need to do now, my class is about to start

 But I am happy for you, Gus needs his daddy

This time I wasn't only off balance, but completely threw off by his words. I never thought about it like that... but I do have people who care about me. An adoptive family, when my biological lacked:

An annoying older sister, who always thinks she is right-Mel. A needy little brother, who just wants his big brother's praise and attention- Micahel. A little sister, who's the princess of my heart- Molly. A caring mother, who isn't afraid of reprimanding me, but never makes me doubt she still loves me- Mother Taylor. A crazy aunt, who is always there to patch me up and give me food- Debbie. A father, who is a role model to me and the one I always go to for support and safety- Vic. A best friend, whose always been there for me and has given me son- Lindsay. A son, who is the light of my life and the bringer of my joy- my Sonny Boy, Gus. And the love of my life, the one who made me see all this and helped me change into a better man. A man worthy of all of them, and him- my Sunshine, Justin.

I still don't know where to put Emmett and Ted, but they are very good friends. Who no matter how much they say they hate me and can't stand me... at the end, they always have my back.

10:23

Are you happy for yourself?

10:25

Getting there

And he was gone again. At least, this was the longest conversation we had since he moved. It was strangely comforting talking to someone, talking to Justin. As if a weight was lifted off my shoulders.

Maybe I should stop bottling everything inside? Maybe I should start talking more to Justin? I thought absent-mindedly to myself.

But had to save that thought for later, I had to start working.

10:00

Mother Taylor is incredible, you know? 

10:01

  I've always known

 What brought that?

10:02

She is the only one who would think a place that used to be used for the baths, is an excellent choice for a business venue.

She is lucky, I believe it's an amazing idea!

 10:03

She did WHAT?!?!?!

  And you are ok with it?

10:04

It is exactly what I was looking for.

Just Kinney style.

Have you thought of a name for my company? 

10:08

 Do you have a team to accompany your new building?

 After all, a label queen can't have only one piece of the collection

 He needs both

10:09

I had assembled a nice team, small but good, from the best ones that Vance kicked out of Vanguard.

I should thank him for being such an idiot, and preferring kiss-ass people over qualified and talented ones.

10:10

  Good thing you are not like that

10:11

Have you thought of a name for my company? 

10:16

 Kinnetik

With that he is gone again. I smiled to myself, before calling Cynthia to tell her that we finally have a name for the company.

The following week passed mostly like the previous three days. I always started the conversation, he replied sometimes right away  or at the afternoons sometimes. Some chats were short, some long- especially when I told him about the gang- and they were always about me. It bothered me a bit, not knowing what was going on with Justin's life.

However, it all changed on the eleventh day from when I began writing to him... he was the one that contacted me first.

That day, I wasn't able to write to him in the morning or afternoon. Cynthia had organized  a whole day full of meetings, with agencies that I had won for Ryder's Advertising but left when Vance bought the company over- they didn't like what he had to offer, especially since I left. They liked the idea of what I had to offer and some of them were ready to sign contracts with me, another wanted to wait and see what Kinnetik becomes.

I was happy that I made the decision of telling Justin that I might not be able to chat with him today, cause I would be very busy with work.

So, you'll need my surprise when I got home, opened my computer and saw notification for my chat with Sunshine. I quickly opened it and even if I wasn't able to see myself, I knew I had a huge smile on my face at what I read.

17:00

  I know you said it would be a busy day for you, but I have to tell you this

 I sold my first sketch today!!!

Well, if I don't count the one you bought from me

Don't be so surprised, I saw you buying it at the show

Thank you, by the way, you buying it made me feel that I was able to be an artist... that I had what was necessary to make it

I rapidly responded, not wanting him to feel as if my work was more important to me than him. That's one of the principal reasons why we went our separate ways.

18:00

Just got home.

I am so proud of you!

It's strange, I haven't heard from Jen today, all proud of her little boy.

What have you planned to celebrate with Daphne? 

18:05

They don't know

No one knows but you and me

You just had to be the first person to tell

I was shocked by his confession, but moved that still after all this I continued to be very important to Justin. That he still worshipped me and wanted to know he made me happy, proud. It was a huge relief.

18:06

I am glad.

How did it happen? 

18:07

  I was sketching at the park, like I always do

This time the topic was kids

One of the parents loved it and paid me fifteen dollars for it, then others came and asked me to make one of their children- paid me the same quantity

Before I knew, I had sold twenty and gained three hundred dollars in a couple of hours

18:08

You sure are one of a kind, Sunshine.

What's the plan for afterwards? 

18:09

  Some of the parents I sold the sketches to, said they would come back with their other children

Also, they said they would tell others about me

I don't want to make things worse between us, but I also didn't want to make his hopes go up.

18:10

 I know that it might not happen

 But I still have to try it, if I get disappointed is ok

 I'll just get back up, and try again

I smiled softly at his words, he is just unique.

18:11

That's my Sunshine. 

18:14

Not anymore

The lump in my throat came back, the one I thought was gone these past eleven days. And he was gone again. It seems we are not there yet, and each day I question myself if we would ever be good again.

It's been around five months since we began chatting. I began feeling as if I had Sunshine back, or at least a part of him. I started to know a part of him I didn't know before. I always knew that I could count on Justin for anything, but these last months I started seeing him as more than a lover- as a friend that I could always tell anything to without fear of judgement.

However, the fear was still there. Not fear of Justin not being worthy of my trust, but fear of me not being good enough for him- and him finally noticing it... again. 

10:00

Alex commented that I let the gang have a lot of power over me.

Especially, Lindsay, Michael and Debbie.

That if I want to be better, I have to have more independence.

Be in control of my life, and not let other influence my decision.

10:03

What do you believe?

10:05 

I asked for the copy of my keys back.

Also, when the remodelling is over I'll have my code and bolt changed.

10:06 

I guess that they didn't take it very well

10:07

I've never seen them more indignant in my entire life!

Surprisingly, the only that didn't have a problem with it was Mikey.

Lindsay and Debbie made sure that the entire Liberty Avenue was notified how angry and how against they were about my decision.

10:08

They have no right to be angry

Those keys were a proof of how much trust you had in them, trust that was  a lot

After all, they were only for emergencies

You don't know how many times I entered the loft, while I was still living with you, just to find one of them making themselves at home

10:08

Why didn't you tell me before?

They had no right to do that!

10:09

Who would you have trusted?

Them, and then you would have called me a drama queen who was exaggerating

10:10

I'm sorry.

10:11

It's coming out more easily lately

Also, you've been apologizing a lot

10:12

I have a lot to apologize for.

Especially, to you.

You didn't deserve what I put you through.

10:20

Thank you

10:20

You're welcomed.

10:23

What's that you mention about a remodelling?

10:24

I bought the loft above me.

I'm having them connected it, so there will be more space to raise Gus.

I will give your mom a key, so she'll send it to you.

10:25

Me?!

Why do I need to have a key to the loft?

10:26

For when you come back to Pittsburgh.

Where else would you stay?

I know that as much as you love Mother Taylor, you like the independence that living away from her gave you.

10:30

Brian... I don't think that's a decision you can make

10:31

Then, who will?

10:32

Me and my boyfriend

I never understood when people use the phrase: 'It broke my heart'. Not even when I discovered that Sunshine moved to New York. However, now I do. Those four little words rocked my world, and not in the good way.

It was me that was gone from the chat this time... and maybe for forever as well.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" Mel's annoyed voice snapped me out of the trance I was in. 

I moved my gaze from the drink towards her, ignored her angry expression and raised my glass "What else do you think I am doing in Woody's?" I snarled.

"You stopped chatting with Justin" she accused me.

"How the fucking hell do you know that?!" I snapped at her, finishing my drink in one go- tempted to ask for another, as always when someone mentioned Sunshine since I discovered he was another man's baby now.

"You stopped acting like this asshole ever since you began communicating with Justin" she replied, lying smoothly- but I didn't have the energies to call her out on it.

"Well, it isn't your damn business. I stuck to the three glasses rule, if the day was rough" I snapped at her again.

"For three months?!" she exclaimed in disbelief.

"It's been a rough season lately" I replied sardonically, slapping some cash- to pay for the drinks- before I gave in to my temptation and fell off the wagon, and left the bar.

"Brian!" she called out to me, rushing to catch up to me "WAIT!" she caught me by the arm and dragged me to the same alley I punched Michael. However, I couldn't do the same this time. After all, she was the mother of my son "Is it because Justin is dating Ethan?"

"So, that's his name" I said in disgust "How did you kno... you kept in contact with him?"

"He didn't want to lose contact with Gus. We Skype everyday, and he reads Gus a bed story every other day" she answered. At least, she looked guilty for keeping this from me "You really thought he was going to keep on waiting for you to pull your head out of your ass?"

"I haven't slept with anyone since he left!" I exclaimed, a dry and empty chuckle, leaving my lips "That is a first for me!"

"Did he know that?! Also, these last months you've been fucking anything that moves! If you were able to fall from the wagon, after an obstacle in your relationship with him, that means you are not ready to be the man Justin deserves!" she screamed at me.

"Relationship?" I repeated "What relationship?! He is dating someone else!" I got on her face.

"And whose fault is that?" her words cut deep, very deep. It must have shown on my face, because her face softened "He was back in Pittsburgh for the summer, did you know? He didn't know if you wanted to see him or not, he was afraid you were angry with him. So, he stayed out of the places you usually go: the loft, the dinner, Woody's and Babylon. You are lucky, otherwise he would have seen your pathetic behavior and ruined everything you worked so hard to have back with him. He is back in New York now" she informed me. I looked at the floor and wanted to cry, I was so close to see Sunshine again and now he is gone... again "You know, he babysat Gus a lot... he confessed a lot of things during those evenings" I perked at those words, interested to know more about it "He is having problems with Ethan, his boyfriends doesn't like that he is still in contact with you. Ethan feels as if he is sharing his boyfriend with another man, as if Justin isn't completely there all the time. Have you ever felt like that?" he shook my head in negation, smirking to know that Sunshine hasn't forgotten about me or let this bastard get between what we have "Justin feels awful, you know? Because when he sold his first sketch he didn't go to Ethan to celebrate, he felt wrong doing that- he went straight to you" I didn't know if to frown or smile at that confession. On one hand, it meant I was still more important to Sunshine than Ian. On the other, it meant they been dating for around seven months... more than half a year "Justin also said that he cares a lot about Ethan... but that he isn't you. And what he has with him doesn't compare with what he had... still has with you"

"What do you want me to do Mel?" I finally asked, resigned.

"Win your man back, Brian. After all, Gus needs his papa back" Mel's words made me look up at her in shock, the implication was huge "Do it and when he graduates, I'll have the papers ready" she promised me, before leaving me in the dark alley- just like I did to Michael that night.

And the same thing happened to me, I got the wake up call I needed and made the decision to not let any bastard get between what is mine and me. As soon as I got home, I took the small package- that I had ready ever since the remodelling was over- and got it ready to take it over Mother Taylor's tomorrow. It had a golden necklace of a sun with diamonds, only the best for my Sunshine.

And a key of my loft, for Justin to know that he'll always have a place in my home. Then I opened the chat, for the first time in almost three months, and sent Justin the lyrics to the song I've been listening to repeatedly since he told me he was taken. In hopes it will be enough of an apology for my Sunshine to accept me back- for now, at least.

Afterwards, I played said song as I laid down on my bed and waited. Because that's all I could do now- wait. As Bruno Mars' sad voice filled the air of the loft, lulling me into sleep:

Same bed but it feels just a little bit bigger now
Our song on the radio but it don't sound the same
When our friends talk about you, all it does is just tear me down
'Cause my heart breaks a little when I hear your name

It all just sounds like oooooh…
Mmm, too young, too dumb to realize
That I should've bought you flowers
And held your hand
Should've gave you all my hours
When I had the chance
Take you to every party
'Cause all you wanted to do was dance
Now my baby's dancing
But she's dancing with another man

My pride, my ego, my needs, and my selfish ways
Caused a good strong woman like you to walk out my life
Now I never, never get to clean up the mess I made, ohh…
And it haunts me every time I close my eyes

It all just sounds like oooooh…
Mmm, too young, too dumb to realize
That I should've bought you flowers
And held your hand
Should've gave you all my hours
When I had the chance
Take you to every party
'Cause all you wanted to do was dance
Now my baby's dancing
But she's dancing with another man

Although it hurts
I'll be the first to say that I was wrong
Oh, I know I'm probably much too late
To try and apologize for my mistakes
But I just want you to know

I hope he buys you flowers
I hope he holds your hand
Give you all his hours
When he has the chance
Take you to every party
'Cause I remember how much you loved to dance
Do all the things I should have done
When I was your man
Do all the things I should have done
When I was your man

After twenty-four hours of silence I was worried that I had pushed Justin so far away this time, that there was no coming back. Luckily, I just had to wait one more day for him to answer. 

When I woke up, two days after the night I received my wake up call, to find a notification from our chat I was bursting with joy. But no word will explain how happy I was when I read the five little words that brought the sunshine back into my life.

10:00

I broke up with Ethan

I didn't know how to reply to that, without sounding so damn happy about his misery. Because knowing Sunshine like I do, he'll blame himself for hurting Ian. It seems that today was my lucky day, since I didn't have to say anything, he was the one that continued texting.

10:02

He was cheating

The hilarious thing is that I felt horrible for breaking his heart, just to find out later that he was cheating for a month

10:03

You broke up with him before knowing he was cheating?

Why?

10:04

Tell me how would I possibly stay with him after your confession of love

Yes, it was of love even if you didn't say it outright

For once I truly believe that I don't need you to say it, that I can finally wait for you to be ready and not wonder where I belong by your side

After all, I have this beautifully tragic lyrics and this enchanting pendant- that will remind me every single day of what I am to you and what place I hold in your life

Not to mention the only copy to the key of your loft

Why would you send me the key when I still live in New York and not when I get back?

10:06

Because I wasn't fair to you Sunshine.

I always told you that my door was open, no lock in place.

It made you feel as if you were replaceable, that your place by my side could change in a matter of minutes.

That's not a good way to live, always questioning yourself if tomorrow I'll still live here.

My behavior also helped you believe that.

I'm sorry for that, Justin.

But that's not what I meant, what I really tried to tell you is that my door will always be open for you Sunshine.

I'll never close my door in your face, even if we are not together.

Mi casa es tu casa.

I hope you'll always remember that, and to help you never forget I put your name on the deed.

10:08

You did WHAT?!

Bri, that wasn't necessary

I trust you, I always believed your word

You never go back into a promise, that's one of the things I always loved the most about you

10:13

Do you still love me?

It took me a bit to ask that question, not sure if I wanted to know the answer. Not even after Mel's speech the other night, maybe she misunderstood Justin and those feelings were gone from my Sunshine.

10:15

I never stopped, Bri

Ethan was just a placeholder

I couldn't continue doing that to him, or myself, or to you... and especially to us

10:17

There's an us?

10:18

There's always been an us

Ever since you picked me up that night from under the street light

10:20

I have to go now, Bri

My classes start earlier this semester

But this is my new cell

Call me XX

I smiled to myself, and for once didn't dread when Justin was gone from the chat. I had my Sunshine back and that's all I cared about. I still have a lot to work on, if I want him back by my side. But for once, I believed we were in a good beginning.

10:00

I am so sorry!!!

Those words caught my attention quickly, not only what they could mean worried me, but the fact that he returned to contact me through the chat. It isn't as if we had left it completely, but after so many months without hearing the beautiful voice of my Sunshine I took great pleasure into our long phone calls. Especially, when they were related to sex- that little twat really has a dirty mouth for being a WASP.

10:01

What's wrong?!

Are you ok?!

10:02

I completely forgot to tell you about!

I didn't mean to

At first, I couldn't share this amazing news with you because you were not answering the chat and were angry at because of Ethan

Then when we fixed things, I was so relieved that I just wanted to enjoy the moment

Afterwards, each time I got back from preparing the show or making some pieces for it we start to talk and I forget about anything but us

I am really sorry Bri!

10:04

Call down a second Sunshine!

Show?!

Are you having a show?!

10:05

Yes

It is not a big deal, it isn't even single show... but it is my first real show

10:06

Not a big deal?!

Sunshine, this is amazing!

I am so proud of you!

When is it?

10:09

In a couple of days... I am so sorry Bri!

It just slipped my mind!

I have an invitation for you and all

I know that with Kinnetik just beginning you can't just drop everything and come for a last minute notice

10:10

Sunshine, what did I say?

Calm down and take deep breaths.

I don't even need to be on the phone to know that you are hyperventilanting.

Now that I mentioned it, why did you contact me through chat and not just called me.

It would have been easier to explain this by phone.

10:12

I was too ashamed to call you

I didn't want to hear the dissapointment and anger in your voice

Sorry!

10:13

Could you please stop saying sorry!

And you tell me I am the one who is apologizing a lot.

Listen Sunshine, I will be there. 

As soon as we finish, I'll book a ticket for tonight or tomorrow morning at the latest.

Who else is invited?

10:14

Mom, Molly, Gus, the girls and Daphne

I invited them over the summer, when I spent it in Pittsburgh

What about Kinnetik?

10:15

I have no reunions for the following days, but the day after the show I'll have to take a flight back to Pittsburgh.

Also, don't worry.

All the ones I had my eyes on decided to change their advertising company to Kinnetik, even the ones that were hesitant at first.

Not to mention that I was able to duply the number of my staff since I got Brown Athletics on our side.

10:16

That's amazing Bri!

10:17

It is.

So, you don't have to worry about Kinnetik.

I, myself, think that I deserve a few days as a vacation.

See you soon, Sunshine.

10:16

See you soon, Bri!

XX

I smiled at the girlish kisses he has been sending me every time we chat lately, I love to tease him about them when we call each other. And will adore seeing his cheeks flush when I do it personally.

I then grabbed my cell and called the munchers, I need to know which flight they are in, to see if I can be there for Gus' first time in an airplane. If not, I'll just see if I can fly with Mother Taylor and Molly. Otherwise, i'll drive myself mad with the anxiety of seeing Sunshine again, without anyone to distract me. 

The smile still in place, not vanishing from how happy I was that I'm going to see my Sunshine again after so long.

At the end, I was able to be there for Gus' first flight. The little boy was afraid at first, but after daddy calmed him down, he was very brave for the rest of the flight- he even had fun! It also, stopped me from overthinking about my meeting with Justin. That, however, didn't stop me from panicking while I got ready for the opening of the show. Lindsay told me that it all began with the portraits that Justin kept on doing of children in Central Park, voice went around about these amazing sketches and this genius artist that more and more people came. Sunshine became quite popular, until the point that not only parents came for portraits of their children, but for themselves as well. Justin's success reached the ears of an owner of a boutique gallery in uptown, he was the dad of a student from an academy which Sunshine's sketches were kind of a trend. She demanded her daddy for one, because all the other girls had them. At the beginning he didn't want to do it, because why buy a portrait of a street painter when he had a gallery with incredible painters that could do it. But after researching a bit, he found about Justin's story and where he was studying from one of the parents- someone who had five kids and a portrait of all of them, and the whole family-, let's just say he became interested. From there you can guess what happened afterwards. 

Sunshine was so busy with the last touches of the show, that he wasn't able to tell me this himself. However, I was going to make sure to 'punish' him later tonight... how I missed his ass. There is no way I'll let him escape any longer. 

When I reached the gallery I thought of going straight towards Justin, but then I would want to drag him straight into the nearest semi-private place I can find and ravish him. That's not a good first image to the art world. So, I decided to go around the place an check some artwork for Kinnetik and the loft. More at the end of the night, I'll head towards Sunshine and snuck him away to have some fun with him. I wandered around for a while, the pieces were very good, but none of them called out to me. I didn't think any will, not since I saw what truly was perfection- and that's Sunshine's art! Each artist- there were five- had six paintings on display, and some of them had a few things extra. In Justin's case were some sketches of the kids or of the most hidden corners of New York that people normally don't see, Sunshine always had the gift of seeing what's being kept undercover- all of them were sold already. But I was calm, because back at Kinnetik- framed on the desk of my office- I had the first Taylor original ever sold.

It was when I reached a painting in specific that made me stop, I knew right away it was Juntin's- who else would have painted the same street light we met under and the Pittsburgh night sky. I stayed there for a while and almost called someone to buy it, when I noticed that it already had a red dot. I almost panicked, but then I realized that Justin would have never put such a personal painting for sale. I then knew that this was already coming to the loft with me, and without spending a dime too. I then took a couple more of steps to find the next masterpiece of the little twat, this one was big: it began with the Pittsburgh's view I have from the loft and then it started to fade into New York city. That kind of view must have been painted from a high place, such as...

"I used to stake out the Empire State for hours, almost for a month, to get to perfect the colors for the painting" Sunshine's voice startled me, I was so immersed in the painting that I didn't know how much time did it pass or what was going around me "I am so irresistible that you weren't able to contain yourself for just a few hours before taking me to your bed and ravishing me?"

"You know me too well" I commented, with a small smile. I then turned around, my breath being taken away by the magnificent creature that Justin is "It's been a long time Sunshine" I got closer to him, hands around his waist and then pulled him to me, so I could kiss him as I desired for months. 

"I missed you, Bri" he murmured against my lips, before stepping backwards "I call this painting 'Fututre'. Would you like to know why?" I nodded my head. He stepped around me, just in front of me, leaving me the opportunity to wrap my arms around him and lay my head on his shoulder "This represents our future Bri, our success in Pittsburgh and our future when we dominate New York"

"Shouldn't you call it 'Dreams' or 'Aspirations'?" I asked him.

"I thought Kinney's always succeed, then why call it dreams when you know it will happen" he replied, slily. 

"Since when do you 'know' me?" I questioned him, recalling the night he left- when he told me that we never really knew each other.

"I always had, what I never knew was your past. But that wasn't a deal breaker... until I lost myself. You helped me find myself, for that I'll always be grateful" he confessed to me.

"We found each other, Sunshine" I replied, smiling at my prince.

Then I finally knew, was sure, that everything was going to be fine. As long as I have him by my side, no one can defeat us.

Everything was too good to be true. Justin's show went so well, that on the third day he was sold out and he was asked to do another one. We stopped chatting at all, nowadays we only communicated by Skype or phone. We started dating again, just a long distance relationship because I couldn't ask him to give up the great opportunity that is studying in New York and triumphing over the Big Apple.

However, as expected, something wrong had to happen. I have begun feeling bad lately, having problems peeing and unexplainable pains. At first, I just thought that it was a cold. But when I noticed blood mixed with my pee and then began coughing blood... then, I knew that something was very wrong with me.

When I went to the doctor and had a complete check up, I never expected to find out what I did. I felt like my whole world was ending.

Normally, I would have dealt with it on my own. But I wasn't the same man as before, I knew that Justin needed to stay in New York to but that he also had to make that decision on his own- I had to tell him. Otherwise, he would have never forgiven me for keeping it a secret from him.

I couldn't say it out loud, then I would have made it real. So, I resorted to our old method of communication. 

18:00

Sunshine.

I have cancer.

Not even a couple of minutes later, I got my answer... one that warmed my heart.

18:01

I'll be there soon

All I could do now is wait and hope that everything works out fine at the end... or else, I'll be dead.