“I wish I never met him,” Brian said into the dark loft. Justin had just left to catch his plane.

He thought of back when Justin left him for the fiddle player. It wasn’t a great memory and hurt but nothing like it did now. Even then he knew Justin would come back, that was puppy love. Something that he had to get out of his system. This thought was his dreams. There was no way Brian could compete with that, and he didn’t want that. He didn’t want to hold him back. That was the whole point of him pushing him towards his dreams, be it the comic book or school. Now is was New York. He felt it deep in his gut that this goodbye was real…the end.

Because of that his heart that he once believed was dead, was broken and bleeding. He hated this feeling. It reminded him too much of his childhood. Wanting love only to get a smack to the face. He had given up on it until he met Michael. But then it was a strange kind of love. It was a love someone had for their trusted dog. Not that he thought of Michael that way, but still. Michael’s crush on him used to be sweet and a way to keep him close. It wasn’t until after he met Justin and the little twat burrowed his way into his heart that he knew the difference. There was the love he had for Michael, where he would still live a happy life if he wasn’t there. Then there was his love for Justin, where he felt his world was ending.

His life would be so much better if he had never met the blonde.

The next day he went to the diner, it was a habit. At least he would have Michael there. They both had said goodbye to their children the day before too. His life felt so damn empty.

“Look whose graced us with his presence today,” Debbie said from the far side of the diner.

“Not today, Deb.” He hoped she would just let it drop, maybe feel some sympathy for him. Usually he wasn’t a fan of it but just wanted peace and quiet today.

“Not today, Deb? And why the hell not? We don’t see you for months at a time and you finally show up, but I’m not allowed to say anything.”

“Months? You saw me yesterday.”

“Pssh. I think I would remember. I’m old but not senile.”

“That’s debatable,” he said as he slid into the booth with Michael. He noticed Emmett and Ted weren’t there. “Hey, Mikey.”

Michael looked up at him with surprise. “You’re talking to me again?”

“Why wouldn’t I?” he asked, feeling like he was in a movie that he didn’t catch the beginning of.

“You said I quote “Don’t ever talk to me again and I’ll return the favor.” Don’t you remember?”

“No, because I never said it. What the hell have you been drinking? I know you’re upset about Jenny but pull yourself together.”

“Who?”

Brian looked at Michael dead in the eyes. He waited for the man to laugh and say gotcha or something stupid like that. “Jenny Rebecca, your daughter.”

“Very funny, Brian. I don’t have a daughter. You know that. You’re the only one with a kid. Of course, I don’t know if you could call that having a kid. Not unless you’ve been visiting Abe and Lindsay didn’t tell us.”

“Who the fuck is Abe?”

Michael looked taken aback. “Your son. I know it’s been a while since you saw him but to forget his name all together.”

“Wait,” Brian said, his head spinning. Michael must have hit his head. He needed to talk to Ted. “Has Ted come in yet?”

Michael’s face dropped, and a hint of a tear escaped his eye. “That’s not funny, Brian.”

“What are you talking about?”

“I know you’re a cold-hearted son of a bitch but to bring Ted up like that. Honestly, Brian I thought better of you,” Debbie roared.

“I don’t know what the fuck you two are on about. Did something happen to Ted?” Why hadn’t someone called him last night?

“Ted’s been dead for two years, but you knew that.”

“What? No, I saw Ted last night. Is it fucking April’s fool’s day or something?”

“Ted and Emmett were killed by those good ol’ boys working for the Mayor.”

“Killed? By Deakins?”

“Deakins? Brian, Stockwell is the mayor. Thankfully, after their deaths he decided to put his power somewhere else. He thought if he concentrated on the gays too much the public would put two and two together.”

“No, Deakin’s won the election. Because of the last-minute ads about Dumpster Boy.”

Debbie’s face turned hard. “Brian that boy had a name. I worked damn hard to find it out. Will you please use it? His name was Justin Taylor.”

The room spun a little and his ears started to ring. “You mean Jason Kemp.”

“I would think I know the boy’s name. I’m the one that found his mother, looked in her eyes as I told her. I wasn’t about to let that homophobic ass detective tell her. I still talk to her. Lovely lady, just not strong enough to kick her husband out and keep her son. That’s how he ended up working the streets. I just wish we could have found out who killed him.”

The ringing in his ears got louder. “But Hunter found out…” he said numbly.

“Who’s Hunter?” Michael asked.

“Hunter. Your and Ben’s adopted hustler.”

Michael looked confused. “Who’s Ben?”

“No no no. This is all wrong. All of this is wrong. Justin didn’t die that night Jason Kemp did.”

“Yo, why do you want me dead?”

Brian looked over to a familiar face of a boy he had never met before. Jason Kemp. Instead of answering, like he even could. He tore out of the diner when breathing became too hard.

Rushing back to his loft he went straight to the computer and typed in Justin’s name.

Justin Taylor, 19, the boy in the dumpster. Everything was the same, except it was Justin and not Jason Kemp. This had to be a nightmare. A terrible nightmare. He then searched for Ted and Emmett. They had died together walking down Liberty Avenue. They had been holding hands to prove they weren’t scared of Stockwell and his goons after he was elected. They were beat to death, Emmett was in a coma for a few days before he died. Ted died on his way to the hospital.

Brian didn’t understand why any of this was happening. All this was in their past.

“Wait,” he muttered to himself and brought Justin’s name back up.

All it was, was his murder. Nothing about the prom. Just as if it never happened. A little more research told him it hadn’t happened. But why?

“I wish I never met him.”

Was this some kind of punishment for making that statement? He didn’t really mean it. He would never not want to know Justin. Justin who was funny, driven, bratty and most of all loving. He would want to know him even if he wasn’t with him.

Brian crawled back into bed and fell asleep, hoping to wake from this nightmare.

The ringing of his phone woke him, turning over he grabbed the phone. “What?” he growled into the phone.

“I know for a fact you didn’t party too hard last night. I was just calling to tell you my plane landed.”

Brian’s breath caught. “You’re alive.”

“Of course, I am. It’s a short flight, you know that. I miss you already though.”

“This was a mistake, come back home. Warhol did it, so can you.”

Justin laughed. “I was already thinking about booking my return ticket. I hate it here.”

“You’ve only been there, what an hour?”

“Too long away from you.”

“I’ll be waiting.”

“Good because I’m hungry.”

Brian laughed. “When aren’t you?”

“Alright, alright. I love you, Brian.”

“Me too.”