Domestic Bliss

Moving I

Brian pulled the Corvette into the driveway of the house. He cut the engine and just sat there looking at it. Justin sat in the passenger seat and didn't move either.

"It's ours," Brian said finally.

"I can hardly believe it," Justin said. "It all happened so fast."

"Yeah," Brian agreed.

They had discussed the house for a whole day after they had seen it with Jennifer. Both of them knew that they loved it, but they also knew it was a big commitment. It scared them, especially since it was considerably over the amount Brian had initially felt he could manage. However, they both loved the house, and so they had decided to put in an offer somewhat below the asking price.

When they had told Jennifer, she had advised them to hold off until they had the house inspected. It had been sitting empty for a few months and there might be some problems. She recommended an inspector who presented them with a report saying that the house was structurally sound, but he had been unable to get the furnace to work. Upon further inspection it looked like the furnace should be replaced as well as the air conditioning unit. Brian had groaned when he heard that, but Jennifer had said that it actually added to their bargaining position. They should drop their offer even more, but then they needed to be prepared to spend the reduced amount for a new heating/air conditioning unit.

So they had come up with an offer, and lo and behold, the sellers had accepted it without even a counter offer. Obviously they wanted to get rid of the burden of keeping the house up. As a result, here they sat in front of their house, even though they didn't actually get possession of it for another week.

Jennifer had already managed to get them an offer on the loft. It was pretty good but they were holding out for almost the full asking price. Jennifer had assured them that they would get it, so they had to wait a little longer.

"I wish we could go in," Justin said, looking longingly at the front door.

"We could call your mom," Brian suggested.

"Yeah, but she'd have to stay with us. I want to be in there, our home, just the two of us."

"A few days and that will be the case," Brian said feeling all warm inside when Justin called it 'our home'. Jesus, maybe buying a house did turn you lesbianic.

"What are we going to do about furniture?" Justin asked.

"There's not much from the loft to bring … my desk, your desk, the table and chairs, the chaise."

"Definitely the chaise," Justin said with a soft smile. He was remembering ice cream kisses. The look on Brian's face told him that he was too.

"Yeah."

"Are you seriously not going to bring the bed?"

"Jennifer is negotiating it as part of the deal along with the appliances. It's practically built in and is so inherent to the look of the loft. It stays there," Brian said firmly.

"I don't care about the look of the loft," Justin replied. "I just can't believe that you want to give it up."

"Would you be okay with bringing it here?" Brian asked studying Justin's face. There was a flicker of concern, almost too fast to notice, but exactly what Brian had been looking for.

"I … sure," Justin said quickly feeling a wrench in his gut. He wished that he had never brought up the subject of the fucking bed.

"You are such a fucking poor liar," Brian said with a grin. "You want a new bed as much as I do."

Justin blushed. He could feel the color rise in his cheeks. "Yeah, I do," he said sheepishly.

"Then let's go buy one," Brian said starting the car.

"Really?"

"You bet."

Justin could hardly contain the size of his smile. This was going to be so good. Brian backed the Corvette out of the driveway and they headed to a local furniture store. Justin's mind was racing as they drove along. He wondered what kind of a bed Brian had in mind. They were going to find the most divine bed, he just knew it. Or at least they would find a bed that they both liked. They could agree on one, he was sure. Or could they? Maybe they each had diametrically opposed ideas of what the bed should be. What if they hated whatever the other one chose? What if they couldn't agree at all? What if their tastes were totally opposite? Justin's face had lost its smile to be replaced with worry wrinkles. He heaved a sigh and braced himself as they pulled into the parking lot of the furniture store.

Brian cut the engine and threw a look in Justin's direction. He could see the tension written all over the young man's face. He frowned. "We're buying a bed, not going to the fucking electric chair," Brian said with a smirk. He wondered what the hell was the matter with Justin.

"We don't have to get it today, do we?" Justin asked.

"Of course not. We're just looking until we find something that we both like."

"What if … what if we never find anything that we both like?" Justin asked deciding to voice his worries.

"You think we're that incompatible?" Brian asked staring into the worried blue eyes.

"I … I don't know. I hope not, but we've never done anything like this before. It was your loft, your furniture, your taste."

"Are you saying you don't like my fucking taste?" Brian asked getting a little testy about the direction this was heading.

"Your loft was beautiful, Brian. Don't get me wrong. I loved it, but it was definitely you … not me."

"And the house will be us," Brian stated confidently.

Justin relaxed a bit with that statement and even tried a little smile. "I want it to be us," he said softly. "But I'm worried that we may have very different ideas about what 'us' should be."

"Haven't we always?" Brian asked with a smirk.

Justin knew he was talking about their relationship, not about furniture, and he smiled more genuinely. "Yeah, I guess we have."

"And we're still together and we chose a house together, an awesome house, I might add. So what's your problem?" Brian stared at Justin his tongue stuck in the side of his cheek.

Justin chuckled a bit and then smiled one of his best. He said softly, "Suddenly there's no problem at all." He leaned over and kissed Brian on the cheek. "Let's go buy our bed."

Two hours later they returned to the loft. They were both grumpy and tired and all patience with each other had been lost.

"I don't know what was wrong with that last bed," Justin said. "It was quite regal."

"Yeah, if you were fucking Henry the Eighth!"

"Have you been fucking him too?" Justin shot back.

Brian groaned. This was going south in a hurry. "Justin…"

"Don't Justin me! That was a great bed. It was huge and four posters are very fashionable."

"Especially with that fucking canopy on top! We don't live in the fucking Middle Ages. We do have central heat, so why do we need fucking drapery hanging down the sides?"

"You'd never know there was central heat living here," Justin said. The loft was always cold with its high ceilings. "And the drapes were elegant."

Brian snorted. "Dust collectors. Made the fucking thing look like it belonged in a goddam doll house."

"Well, better we should live in a doll house than some sterile museum out of Architectural Digest!"

"Sterile! Are you calling the loft sterile?" Brian couldn't believe his ears.

"If the description fits…"

"Christ, Justin, I thought you at least understood style."

"Well, fuck you, Kinney! I thought you had good taste, but now I know your taste is all in those fucking bare feet of yours."

Brian glared in amazement at his partner. What the fuck were they fighting about? So they couldn't find the right bed today. There were plenty more stores and the internet and catalogues. He grimaced. How did this degenerate into personal attacks?

"Justin, what the fuck are we doing?"

Justin stared blankly at Brian. "We're fighting."

"But what for?"

"Because … because we couldn't find a bed that we both liked."

"So why is that something we need to fight about? There's plenty more places to find the right bed," Brian said reasonably.

"I guess…" Justin said slowly. "But it's also the first big thing that we have bought together, and look at what's happened. We're fighting."

"It's a fucking bed! It shouldn't cause us to fight."

"But it did. Do you think it's an omen of what's to come?"

"Christ, I hope not!"

Justin looked at the floor not knowing what to say. He was kind of scared. He and Brian hardly ever fought, and never like they had just been doing. What were they going to do?

"Do you want something to eat?" Justin asked deciding that maybe it was best if they changed the subject altogether. And, they had missed lunch. Justin heard his stomach rumble ominously at the mention of food.

"Obviously you do," Brian said with a chuckle having heard the rumblings. He moved to the fridge and pulled out a loaf of bread and the jar of peanut butter. "Will this do?" Brian asked.

"Sure," Justin agreed. He would have liked something more but peanut butter would do.

"We can go to the diner or order something in, if you would prefer," Brian said noting the look on Justin's face.

"A sandwich is fine," Justin said pulling out some bread and slathering it with peanut butter. He frowned. "Why couldn't we do that with the bed?" he asked.

"Do what?"

"Make a compromise. I really wanted something more to eat, but it doesn't really matter that much. This will tide me over and I can have a big dinner. Why couldn't we do something like that with the bed?"

"A bed is going to last a lot longer than a sandwich … and it won't go moldy," Brian added.

"But relationships can go moldy," Justin said reliving the fight about the bed.

"Not if you keep them fresh," Brian offered.

Justin snorted. "Mr. Expert-on-Relationships!"

"Well, at least I'm trying," Brian scowled.

"Are you implying that I'm not?" Justin demanded. He slammed the pieces of bread together and almost threw one of them at Brian.

Brian reached in the fridge for a beer wanting something stronger. He relented a little when he asked, "Want one?"

Justin nodded and they took their food to the table. They sat across from each other munching on their sandwich and eyeing each other speculatively.

Brian swallowed the lump of food in his mouth. It was all he could do to get it down, and he had a sneaking suspicion that it could come back up. All this drama was getting to him. The day had started out so well, going to look at their new house. He wasn't sure why everything had turned bad, but it all stemmed from the bed controversy.

Justin chewed on his sandwich. He couldn't remember when peanut butter had become so tasteless. He could see Brian giving him furtive glances, probably wondering what the hell was going on. He wished he could figure out what to do. Then it hit him.

"Brian," he said, "do you think we could just stay here?"

"Stay here?" Brian bellowed his eyes getting very large and angry. "What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I … I was just wondering if it was too late to cancel the deal on the house."

"Of course, it fucking is! We get possession in a few days. We've signed all the papers."

"Oh," was all Justin could say.

"Oh! Oh? What do you mean … oh? What's wrong? I thought you loved that fucking house."

"I do."

"Then why the fuck do you want to cancel the deal and stay here?"

Justin took a deep breath and plunged ahead. "It just seems that we've been fighting and worried and not getting along … ever since we found that house."

Brian shook his head looking baffled. "This was supposed to be the next step in our fucking relationship … or do we even have a relationship anymore?" Each time he said relationship he spat it out with as much disdain as he could. Brian stood up abruptly knocking his chair over backwards. "Fuck, I hate that word, and this just proves why!"

He stomped up the steps and left Justin sitting staring after him. Inside of a minute he reappeared, grabbed his keys from the counter and yanked back the loft door.

"Don't," Justin said loud enough to be sure Brian would hear him.

"What did you say?" Brian bellowed. "Are you ordering me around now?"

"I'm not ordering. I'm asking. In fact, I'm begging. Please, Brian, don't walk out on me. We've come too far to go back to this. We have to work this out."

Brian hesitated in the doorway and Justin held his breath. He wouldn't blame Brian if he walked out, but he also knew that it could very well mean that everything was over between them if he did. They had reached a level of trust that couldn't, shouldn't, wouldn't be broken. Justin willed Brian to come back and talk to him.

Suddenly the loft door rumbled along its track and Brian was still standing inside the loft when it slammed closed. Justin let out his breath. That was the first good sign since they had gone looking for a fucking bed. Justin looked up to see Brian standing defiantly in front of him.

"I'm here," Brian said. "I didn't leave. I didn't … run. Are you going to tell me what the fuck this is all about?"

"I wish I knew," Justin said shaking his head. "It started at the new house when you said we could buy a new bed. I began wondering if we could find something that we both would like. I … I began to doubt that we could."

"Does that explain that weird look on your face when I pulled into the lot at the furniture store?"

Justin nodded. "I was having doubts about the bed, about being able to find one that we'd both like, and then you made some comment about our relationship, and I could apply the same worries to that. And it all went downhill from there. And then we couldn't find a bed and we were getting grouchy with each other … and it was like my worst fears were all coming true." Justin took a deep breath feeling the sting of tears behind his eyes.

"So let me get this straight," Brian said. "You think that because we didn't find a bed on our first try that our fucking relationship is doomed?"

"Something like that," Justin whispered.

"Do you have so little faith … in us?"

"I don't know what I think. I'm just worried."

"Justin, after all we've been through, I don't see how this step can be worse than other things that have happened. In fact, it should be so much better. Stop worrying."

"I wish I could," Justin said forlornly. "It's like … like a continuation of what worried me about the rings."

"It is?"

"It means that … that there's no going back, and if we fail…"

"Do you want to go back?" Justin shook his head. "Do you think we're going to fail?"

Justin looked up into Brian's eyes. He wanted to say no, but he knew that wasn't true. Some part of him feared that they would. Their relationship had always been volatile. How many times had Brian kicked him out? And then Justin had walked out with his eyes wide open, stupid fuck that he had been. "I don't want us to fail," Justin said softly.

"Neither do I," Brian replied staring into the blue eyes. "Let's go look on the internet and see if we can find a bed that we both like. If we do, will that prove to you that we at least have a flying fuck of a chance to make this thing work?"

Justin chuckled. "That was so romantic, Brian. How could I refuse an invitation like that?"

Brian took Justin's hand and pulled him up. He dragged his twink over to the computer and pulled him down onto his lap as they waited for the computer to boot up.

"I'm sorry, Brian. I just got scared. I don't like fighting."

"Neither do I. I didn't mean to get testy, but you sounded like you had given up."

"I know. It was a drama queen moment."

Brian snorted. "That's for sure. Okay, let's see what we can find," he said starting to scroll through possible sites. They looked at page after page of beds, eliminating most of them immediately. Justin fidgeted wondering if this was as pointless as the stores they had been to earlier in the day.

All of a sudden they found beds by Roberto Galima. Justin sucked in a breath and said, "Oh!"

"See something you like?" Brian asked studying Justin's face. He could live with any bed on that internet page. He hoped Justin could too.

"I love these," Justin said.

"They even have a four poster," Brian said sardonically.

"I know, but they're all … classic."

"Yes, they are. Which one do you like best?" Brian asked hoping as he held his breath that Justin would choose the one he liked.

Justin studied the screen. "That one … definitely," Justin said pointing to the very one Brian had been studying. He almost knew that would be Justin's favorite.

Brian grinned. "Brushed steel frame with high canopy and latticework headboard and footboard," Brian read from the ad. "I like the clean simple lines. It's sleek and yet comfortable looking."

Justin could picture them having sex and then leaning back against the headboard with lots of pillows, kissing and maybe reading in bed together. "That's definitely the one," Justin said with a dreamy look on his face.

"I agree, Sunshine," Brian said giving Justin a kiss on the cheek. "Um … we don't have to have drapery hanging from the canopy, do we?"

"It's the four poster canopy bed I've always wanted, but it's not fussy like you want. I like it plain without any decoration or drapery." Justin threw his arms around Brian's neck and hugged him tight. He kissed the red lips rubbing his own luxuriously over Brian's. "We found it!" he crowed.

"And you thought it couldn't be done," Brian smirked proud of them both for getting over this hurdle. His eyes scanned the screen looking for how to order the bed or if there was a local outlet. "Shit!" he said.

"What?" Justin asked not aware of what Brian had been doing.

"There's no local outlet for these beds and it takes four to six weeks for delivery."

"Oh, shit. We need a bed for when we move in."

"We could always fuck on the floor, I guess," Brian said.

"I don't think so, although it wouldn't be the first time," Justin chuckled. "We need something to sleep on as well as fuck on."

"Hmm," Brian said.

"What are you thinking about?"

"I'm thinking that we could get a new mattress. We'll need one for the new bed when it arrives. In the meantime we could sleep on it on the floor."

"That would work," Justin agreed with a smile.

"We might decide we don't need a bed at all," Brian smirked.

"Briaaan," Justin warned him. Then something on the screen caught his attention. "Look," he said pointing, "they have matching pieces to go with the bed."

Brian groaned. "This is going to cost me a fucking fortune. Did you see the price of that bed?"

"No," Justin admitted, "I was too excited that we had found something we both like. Is it too much money?"

"No, Sunshine, we can manage it. I'll just get Ted to free up some money."

"Thanks," Justin said kissing Brian's cheek. "I really love that bed."

"I know, so let's get the matching pieces. We do need furniture … and I like quality."

Justin snorted. "You like the designer name on it."

"We both love the look of it," Brian said ignoring Justin's jibe because he was absolutely right.

"True," Justin admitted. "Does Ted know about the house?"

"Yeah, I had to run it all by him to make sure I could swing it. But he's sworn to secrecy."

"Why?"

"Because I want a few weeks to get the house put together and … for it to be just you and me there alone."

"I like the sound of that," Justin said hugging him.

"Besides, we'll have to christen each room, and that'll take at least a day or two."

Justin giggled and nuzzled Brian's neck. "We should make use of the old bed while we still have it."

"We're not moving for a few days," Brian said his hand reaching for Justin's cock. He squeezed through the jeans causing a little gasp from his partner.

"Wouldn't want to miss an opportunity," Justin cooed.

"Enough shopping for today. Shall we give the old bed a good workout?"

"As long as we don't break it," Justin giggled. "It's practically sold."

"If it's still in one piece at this point, I don't think there's much danger of it collapsing now."

"Then what are we waiting for?" Justin asked standing and pulling Brian up into a kiss.

They made their way to the bedroom where clothes quickly disappeared and the kisses were hot and heavy. Justin pushed Brian onto the bed deciding to be the aggressor.

"I love you, you know," he said softly as he rubbed his length against Brian.

"I know. I wish…" Brian hesitated to say more.

"Wish what?" Justin asked.

Brian sighed. "Justin, are you sure you want to do this?"

"Oh, I want to fuck you! Is there ever any doubt?"

"That's not what I meant."

Justin frowned. "What did you mean?" he asked warily.

"Are you sure you want to stay with me? Do you want to move into the new house? Do you want to … continue?" Brian heaved a huge sigh. He knew he sounded like a fucking lesbian but he couldn't help himself.

"Now it sounds like you're having second thoughts. I want what we have … and, I want more. I want it all."

"But we're going to have to be adults. We'll have a house and you'll get a job and we'll be … shudder … a couple." Brian tried to lighten the mood.

"Fuck you, Kinney! We are a couple!"

"No!" Brian gasped in mock surprise.

"You had me going there for a minute, you asshole."

"I always get you going," Brian whispered against Justin's ear as he flipped them over.

"Always," Justin gasped as he felt Brian's fingers exploring and opening him up.

They wrestled around on the bed for a bit with lots of kissing and nipping and caresses. When they were both panting Brian lifted Justin's legs onto his shoulders and drove home. They both gasped at the sensation.

Justin clasped his legs behind Brian's neck and forced the man's head lower so he could savage the ripe, red lips. When he broke the kiss, he whispered, "Do you think it will be this good in our new bed?"

"Better!" Brian replied as he began thrusting in earnest.

Pants and gasps and an occasional whimper were the only sounds for the next while. Brian rode his young lover hard and Justin loved every minute of it. When they came, close to each other, they rode the waves of pleasure as long as they could. Finally Brian pulled out and flopped down beside Justin.

"That was awesome," Justin said trying to steady his breathing.

"Not bad," Brian grinned, turning to look at Justin.

"I can hardly wait to fuck you in the new house," Justin said curling up against Brian.

"I might let you," Brian said sticking his tongue in his cheek.

"You damn well better," Justin stated. "I'll be paying my own way when I get a decent job."

"Do you mean to tell me that all this time you've only been letting me fuck you because I was paying the way?"

"Yes, what did you think, my sugar daddy?"

"Don't call me that, Brian protested.

"I'm really a top, you know," Justin said trying to contain his giggle.

"You do a pretty damn good imitation of a bottom, if you ask me," Brian replied with a smirk.

"Well all that's about to change, bottom boy!"

"Who are you calling a bottom boy?" Brian demanded.

"Well, the bottom part is correct anyway."

"Take that back, brat!" Brian demanded rolling over and pinning Justin beneath him.

"Never!" Justin said defiantly. "When I contribute half to our finances, I expect to only bottom half the time."

"Jesus Christ, Justin, are you serious?" Brian asked.

"Of course, I am," Justin stated trying to keep a straight face. Brian so deserved this for all the times he had taken Justin for granted.

"I'm … not … sure … I can do that," Brian said. "I really am a top."

Justin saw the look of almost terror on Brian's face. The man had been a top his whole life. It defined who he was. Justin realized that maybe he had gone a bit too far.

"I was only kidding, Brian," Justin said softly. "I love bottoming for you. You know that."

"Asshole!" Brian said harshly but then he leaned in and kissed Justin softly. "I don't mind bottoming for you sometimes."

"In fact you love it … sometimes."

Brian grinned at him. "Yeah."

"I don't expect you to do it all the time, but I can be the top more often, can't I?" Justin asked.

"I think we can work something out. And when you start earning more than me, you can top all the time, if you still want this sorry, wrinkled old ass," Brian said only half joking.

"I'll always want your sorry old ass, like right now."

"Now?" Brian asked.

"Now!"

"You think this old bed is up for one more?"

"I know that I am," Justin said glancing down to where his hard cock was trapped between them.

"We're going to be fine in the new house, aren't we?" Brian asked softly as he held Justin's face between his hands, still stretched out on top of this lovely man.

"We're going to be great in the new house," Justin declared. "We do have one big hurdle to overcome though."

"What's that?" Brian wanted to know his brow knit into a frown.

"We still have to furnish the living room." Brian groaned as Justin continued. "And the dining room … and Gus' room … and the office … and the spare bedroom."

"Fuck!" Brian griped.

"I intend to right now," Justin said with a giggle. "We can worry about furniture later. I know we can do it, now that we've found our bed."

"The only important piece of furniture," Brian said with a smirk.

"So are you ready, my little bottom boy?"

Brian grimaced. "I'm all yours, O Mighty Top!" And he meant that in every sense of the word.

Domestic Bliss

Moving II

Over the next couple of weeks Brian and Justin went shopping for other pieces of furniture. They bought a mattress and box spring for the new bed that wouldn't arrive for another month. They also managed to find some child's furniture for Gus' room. They found a dining suite that they both loved, but couldn't find sofas for the family room or living room. Their tastes didn't seem to coincide in this area at all.

The offer on the loft came up to their asking price along with the agreement to leave almost all the furnishings there. They got the keys to the new house a couple of weeks after that fateful Saturday when they had found their bed. They had actually taken possession earlier, but had not wanted to go to the house until the furnace was replaced. Jennifer had taken care of that for them. They also wanted to wait until their mattress would arrive so that they could sleep there once they moved in. They actually had very little, other than clothes and a few pieces of furniture, to move from the loft.

The Saturday morning of their actual move arrived bright and sunny, a beautiful spring day. Brian awoke and rolled onto his side to look at Justin. Blue eyes stared back at him.

"How long have you been awake?"

"I'm not sure I ever slept," Justin said as he stretched.

"Oh yes, you did," Brian said.

"How do you know?"

"The last time I fucked you, you were almost asleep before I pulled out," Brian smirked. "And here I thought youth was equated with stamina," Brian added sticking his tongue in his cheek.

Justin stared at Brian. "You have no idea how hard it is to be a good bottom, do you?" Brian merely stared back and sucked his lips into his mouth. "It takes hard work and dedication … and incredible flexibility … and monumental creativity. I work so hard, and what thanks do I ever get. You tops just don't underst…" His words were cut off by Brian's mouth capturing his lips and almost sucking him into the orifice.

"You are so full of bullshit," Brian chuckled when he finally released his young lover. They were both hard as a result of the kiss.

"What do you mean? I just got us hard, didn't I?" Justin asked batting his eyelashes.

"So you're responsible for this?" Brian asking giving Justin's cock a tug. "What about my kiss?"

"It takes two to make a kiss," Justin said smugly. "And I was the creative bottom that caused that kiss."

Brian snorted and Justin giggled. He liked getting the better of the older man.

"Twat," Brian said but his hands were already roaming the pliant body beneath him. "I'm going to fuck that smug look right off your face."

"Promises, promises," Justin said grinning from ear to ear.

"You think I can't do it?"

"Prove it," Justin dared him. He knew this would be their last fuck in the old bed and he wanted to make it a good one.

Brian pinned Justin's hands above his head, using one of his hands. The other hand tweaked Justin's nipple causing him to gasp. Justin could feel his cock harden even more. He squirmed beneath Brian trying to rub his dick against Brian's. Brian moaned into Justin's mouth as his kiss threatened to swallow Justin whole.

"Is this the best you can do?" Justin challenged him as he continued to squirm.

"I've hardly started," Brian said and the look on his face gave Justin a moment's pause. Maybe he had gone too far.

Brian released Justin's hands and pulled the blond's legs up, pushing them against Justin's chest. Brian's head ducked between them and Justin felt Brian sucking on his balls. Justin sucked in a breath willing his cock not to explode. He whimpered Brian's name and the man looked up at him.

"Something wrong, Sunshine?" Brian asked with his best look of innocence.

All Justin could do was groan. He knew there was no sense in pleading. Brian was going to do what Brian was going to do. He might as well just enjoy the ride. He closed his eyes and willed his orgasm to back off. Brian looked up and saw the closed eyes.

"Look at me, Justin," Brian said. Justin's eyes opened and he stared into the hazel ones full of lust and determination. "I'm going to fuck you into next week and you're going to enjoy it." With that Brian's tongue followed the path along his perineum and then plunged into Justin's pucker.

The boy cried out, "Jesus, Brian!"

"Need a little lube?" Brian asked grinning at Justin. Justin nodded.

Brian squirted the cold lube on Justin's pucker and proceeded to open him up with his fingers. Justin squirmed and moaned until he felt the cold lube shoot up his ass. He blinked in bewilderment at Brian who ignored him, grabbed his cock and stuck it unceremoniously up Justin's ass. Justin cried out and thrashed around for a minute. Brian took a bit of pity on his very bad boy. He waited till Justin calmed down and started breathing more normally. As soon as that happened, Brian renewed his assault. He plunged in deep and forcefully bending Justin in half and forcing all the air from his lungs. He rammed his lover unmercifully until Justin called out and exploded all over them both.

Justin gasped for needed air as Brian stilled for a moment. He could feel Brian's ramrod cock still hard and unsatisfied up his ass. He knew this was far from over. As soon as he had recovered a bit Brian again drove in. He leaned in and kissed Justin long and luxuriously.

"Still feeling smug, Sunshine?" Brian asked knowing that smug had been left far behind, long before Justin's orgasm. Justin shook his head, looking into Brian's eyes with something like fear. Brian softened as soon as he saw that look. "I didn't hurt you, did I?" Brian asked concern in his voice.

"No," Justin gasped. "It's just a little … overwhelming."

Brian smiled and began his rhythm. He had decided that Justin would get off once more before he allowed himself release. He pounded into the tight channel until they were both covered in sweat and panting for air. Every time Justin reached for his dick, Brian swatted the hand away. He was not going to allow Justin to touch himself. The boy would get off again without any external help, or they would both die trying.

Justin wasn't sure how long Brian plowed into him but he knew every nerve ending in his body was on fire, his cock throbbed and ached, he was wet and slippery with sweat, everything was fuzzy when he tried to focus. He thought he was begging and asking Brian to finish him off, but he couldn't be sure if any intelligible words were actually coming out of his mouth.

Suddenly he heard Brian groan and call, "Now!"

He felt Brian's hot jizz shoot up his channel, deep inside him. He thought he could almost taste it in the back of his throat. Brian thrust hard three times and then Justin was shooting and waves of incredible heat consumed him. He felt Brian fall on top of him and then roll away. He was glad his lover did because he thought any areas that touched between them might have been scorched by the heat they had created.

The room spun around disconcertingly and Justin kept his eyes tightly closed until it slowed down. When he tried to open them, he saw Brian's out of focus face staring at him.

"You all right?" Brian gasped trying to get his breathing under control. Justin tried to answer but his voice wouldn't seem to work as he sucked in some much needed air. Instead he nodded. "All smugness gone?" Brian asked. Justin nodded again. Brian fell back exhausted and was content to just lie there and breathe.

"That was so intense," Justin whispered after a bit.

"Yeah."

"What made you do it?"

"I'm always up for a dare."

"Don't you mean a taunt?" Justin asked giggling a little now that he could actually breathe normally.

"Whatever!" Brian replied.

"Remind me to be careful about what I taunt you with."

"Didn't you like it?" Brian asked looking back at Justin.

"Oh, I liked it … loved it. But you could have killed us both."

"I'm not ready to die yet," Brian declared.

"Shit, Brian, look at the time," Justin said seeing the clock behind Brian's head. "The movers will be here in twenty minutes."

"Damn," Brian responded, "and I wanted to fuck you once more in the shower."

"After what you just did, I'm not sure I'll be ready to fuck you again today."

Brian smirked. "Where's the consummate bottom with all the stamina and creativity?"

"I caused what just happened to happen," Justin declared before he leaped to his feet and ran for the bathroom before Brian could catch him. He heard the man chuckling as he joined him in the shower and he knew that everything was all right.

They only had time to wash before the movers got there. They had everything packed up and ready except for the stuff the movers would do for them. They stripped the bed and stuffed the sheets into one of the boxes to be laundered when they got to their new home. They checked all the drawers and cupboards and the fridge to make sure everything was spotless and ready for the new occupants. Brian went into the bathroom to make one last check there while the movers continued to carry boxes down to the truck. When Brian didn't return for a while Justin went looking for him. He found him standing in the middle of the bathroom staring at the shower.

"What are you doing?" he asked coming up beside his partner.

Brian jumped obviously having been lost in thought. "I … I was … remembering."

"Remembering what?" Justin asked softly. He could see that some kind of sadness had crept into Brian's psyche.

"I was picturing all the times I fucked you in this shower," Brian said softly.

"Could your mind comprehend them all?" Justin asked with a smile, trying to lighten the moment.

"We had some awesome times in that shower," Brian said.

"Yeah, we did," Justin agreed feeling some of the sadness at leaving their first home come over him too. "But we have a new shower where we can create even better memories."

"I guess, but I would have liked to have done it one more time before we left."

Justin understood where Brian was coming from. The loft had always been symbolic of Brian, of his lifestyle, of who he was, and he was giving all that up. The loft had been where they had first come together, where they had first fucked and first made love.

"We still could," Justin whispered. "Give the movers the keys and they can unload at the new house. We'll meet them there as soon as we're through."

"Thanks," Brian said with a gentle smile. "I'll go tell them."

Justin smiled to himself. He found it somehow touching that Brian would be nostalgic about leaving the loft, and obviously he was. He wanted to make it as easy for him as he could.

When Brian returned Justin pulled him into an embrace. "It's going to be okay, Brian. We have a great new place to go to. We have the rest of our lives ahead of us."

"I know."

"Um … Brian?"

"What?"

"Take it easy on me, okay? I'm still a little sore from earlier. You know," Justin smiled crookedly.

"Sorry about that, Sunshine, but you shouldn't taunt me."

"Come on, big guy," Justin cooed starting to strip off his clothes.

"Jesus, Justin, let me make sure the movers have gone."

"Sure," Justin said standing in all his naked glory in front of Brian. The tent in Brian's jeans told him he was having the desired effect.

Brian hurried out. He quickly returned having removed his T-shirt and in the process of unbuttoning his jeans.

"I take it they're gone?" Justin asked.

"No, they'll be right in to join us," Brian said keeping a straight face. Justin threw a worried glance over Brian's shoulder half expecting the movers to appear. "Relax," Brian said swinging Justin around. "They're gone and I locked the door."

"Then what are we waiting for?" Justin asked reaching into the shower to start the water.

About twenty minutes later they stood under the spray of the shower clinging to each other and letting the water wash away the remnants of what they had just done. Justin kissed Brian's neck and leaned his head against Brian's shoulder. Brian had been very gentle and Justin appreciated that.

"I love you, you know," Brian said suddenly.

Justin looked up into the hazel eyes. "I know. I know it every time you look at me or touch me or fuck me. I know."

"That's good," Brian said softly. "I know I don't say it often enough."

"Remember that night you kissed every part of my body and with every kiss you said, "I love you?"

"I remember. That was supposed to last you a lifetime."

"It will, but it's always nice to hear it again … every now and then," Justin said as he reached up to kiss Brian's full lips.

"We should go see what kind of havoc the movers are wreaking on the new house."

Justin knew the sentimental Brian had just been put away. The all business Brian was now in full mode. He released his partner and turned off the water. They stepped out of the shower realizing they had packed the bath mat. Then it dawned on them both that all their towels were in boxes on their way to the new house.

"Shit!" Brian said. "How are we going to get dry?"

"We'll air dry eventually," Justin said with a chuckle.

"I don't want to wait. We need to get to the new place and see what kind of a disaster the movers have created," Brian said looking around for something to dry off with.

"I could lick you dry," Justin volunteered with a chuckle.

"As tempting as that is, I want to get to the house today."

"Wait," Justin said remembering something. He dashed out of the bathroom and returned quickly with a roll of paper towels.

"You've got to be kidding," Brian said staring at the object in Justin's hand.

"It's either this … or the air … or my tongue. Take your pick," Justin said pulling off some towels and beginning to wipe his chest and legs.

Reluctantly Brian followed suit. "This never happened," he said in a threatening voice as he wiped his balls and cock.

Justin giggled. "Another fine mess you and your dick have gotten us into, Ollie."

"Shut up, Stan, and get your fucking clothes on."

"Yes, Ollie," Justin responded with a giggle dropping the used paper towels and pulling on his jeans.

They dressed quickly. Justin gathered up the used paper towels to put in a garbage bag and down the chute. He wiped up the trail of water he had left on the hardwood when he went to get them. They walked to the loft door where they both stopped and turned around to look at the mostly empty loft. It seemed kind of sad with all their things gone except for the sofa and coffee table and the bedroom furniture.

"I'll miss it," Brian said with a tinge of sadness in his voice.

"We lived here for a long time."

"Yeah," Brian agreed. He took a deep breath. "Let's go."

Justin linked his fingers through Brian's as they made their way out of the loft. They locked the door behind them knowing that they were leaving one way of life behind in the loft and moving on to a new one. They quietly began walking down the stairs, each wanting to prolong their time in the old building a little longer.

-----

When they arrived at the new house the moving van was pretty well empty. One of the men was still carrying boxes into the house. They had labeled everything with the room where the box or item should be deposited. They would unpack everything and begin making the house theirs as soon as the movers left.

Not long after the movers departed, the furniture store truck pulled into the driveway. It was bringing their mattress, the dining suite, and Gus' bedroom furniture. With great dispatch the driver and his helper had all the furniture set up in the appropriate rooms, and they even took all the packaging away.

"I can't believe we're actually here," Justin said as he closed the door behind them.

"And alone at last," Brian smirked.

"Behave now. We have work to do."

"We do?"

"Brian, the house is full of unpacked boxes. We … need to unpack them."

"Do we now?" Brian's arms came around his young lover and he pulled him into a long, deep kiss. "We have other work to do first."

"Like what?" Justin asked feeling his cock growing hard as Brian's hands wandered over his body.

"We have to christen each room. We should get started right now. Who knows how long it might take us."

"Briiiaaan, we need to unpack. There'll be lots of time for that later," Justin said. However, he didn't push away from Brian. He waited to see what Brian would do. If the man wanted to fuck, he could do that, in spite of the fact that that his ass had already had two good workouts this morning and it was barely noon.

"Okay," Brian said kissing his forehead, "but I expect my creative bottom to come up with some good ways to fuck without furniture."

"I'll think on it," Justin chuckled. "I'm hungry. How about you?"

"You're always hungry, but I could eat."

"One problem, we don't have any food."

Just then the doorbell rang. They both jumped not expecting anyone to find them there.

"Are any other deliveries supposed to be coming today?" Brian asked. He released Justin and walked to the door. He scrunched down to look through the peephole. "It's your mother," he mouthed.

"So let her in," Justin said hoping he would not regret that statement.

"Mother Taylor!" Brian said opening the door.

"Brian," she replied as she passed him by carrying bags and heading for the kitchen.

"Mom, what are you doing?" Justin asked.

"I figured you boys would be busy all day unpacking so I brought sandwiches for lunch and a casserole for dinner. I went to the grocery store and bought some basics so you can stock the refrigerator and keep body and soul together for a few days."

"I could have done that," Justin said lamely.

"I figured you'd be busy with other things," she said giving each of them a knowing glance.

Justin felt the color rise in his cheeks. This bold and somewhat brassy version of his mother was still a little hard to take at times.

"What do I owe you for the groceries?" Brian asked.

"Not a thing," Jennifer smiled. "With the commissions I made on this place and the loft, it's the least I could do for my two … sons."

Brian heard the hesitation, but her use of that term for both of them pleased him somewhere deep inside. He smiled fondly back at her.

"So, join us for lunch, mom," Justin said. "That is if you brought enough for all of us."

"Here," she said handing him a bag. He began opening the packets of sandwiches. I don't even know where the plates are," he said looking around.

"They're in one of these boxes," Brian said starting to read what they had labeled on each.

"Oh, a paper towel will do," Jennifer replied.

Justin blushed. "Um … we used up all the paper towels at the loft," Justin replied giving Brian a smirk.

The man glared back at him. Jennifer watched the interplay and decided maybe she didn't want to know.

"There's a new roll in the grocery bag. I thought you might need them, and they keep forever."

Justin quickly found them and they sat down at the table and chairs which they had brought from the loft to sit in the breakfast nook of the kitchen. The set looked quite nice there as Jennifer proceeded to tell them.

She had brought some cold bottles of water and beer from which they each made a selection, placing the rest in the fridge.

"Was it hard leaving the loft this morning?" she asked looking at Brian.

"Yeah," Justin replied for both of them. "Has the new guy moved in yet?"

"No, I'm meeting him at the loft at three o'clock. I need your keys," she said to Brian. "He'll probably change the locks anyway, but he'll need yours until he gets that done."

Brian took out his key ring and so did Justin. They removed the loft keys and the front door keys for the building on Tremont, handing them over to Jennifer.

"It's really over … the loft … and everything," Justin said a little shakily. Brian nodded but found he couldn't get his voice to work.

Jennifer took them and matter-of-factly placed them in an envelope she drew out of her purse. She dropped the envelope inside and closed the purse. Brian felt like a chapter of his life had just ended and he sucked in a deep breath. He hoped they were doing the right thing. He was banking everything on Justin.

"I'm surprised nobody's here helping you two move in," Jennifer said.

"Mom, we told you that we weren't telling anyone that we moved for now. We want to be alone and set the place up the way we want it … without anyone interfering."

"You mean me?" she asked arching her eyebrows.

Justin opened his mouth to deny that but Brian beat him to it. "You've been great about everything, Jennifer. Can you keep our secret a little longer? We'll tell people when we're ready."

Jennifer looked into Brian's eyes and nodded. She could refuse him nothing when he looked at her like that. "Of course," she said. "But what if they call the loft or go there?"

"Then the new owner will have a surprise," Brian said with a smirk. "Shit! Mikey has a key and so does Lindsay."

"I better make sure I tell the new owner to change the locks immediately," Jennifer said.

Brian nodded in agreement. "We kept the same phone number, so if they call it, we'll get it here. Usually I get most calls on the cell anyway."

"Why not just tell them?" Jennifer had to ask.

"Mom!" Justin said and she knew she better leave it.

"I'm finished with my sandwich," Jennifer said changing the subject. "Why don't I help you unpack a few boxes before I go to the loft? I could do the fridge."

"Um … mom, take the dishes. They're in these boxes here I think," Justin said quickly. He really didn't want her finding the poppers in the box for the fridge. She was much too inquisitive as it was. Dishes would be much safer for her to deal with.

"Sure, honey."

"Let's get to work, honey," Brian said in that silly falsetto voice he used sometimes. He pinched Justin who responded with a warning look. They all got to work unpacking things and choosing the best cupboard to store the items in.

Jennifer stayed for more than an hour. By the time she left, they had the kitchen all set up and everything stowed in convenient spots.

"I love this kitchen," Justin said as he came back in from seeing his mother to her car. He stood in the middle of the floor and turned around taking it all in.

"You have a kitchen fetish, don't you?" Brian asked watching him from where he was sitting, taking a break at the table.

"Huh?" Justin asked in bewilderment.

"It seems to me that the first thing you said in the loft was 'nice kitchen'."

Justin felt himself blushing. "Do you think this means that I secretly want to be the little housewife?"

"Is there any doubt?"

"Shit!" Justin didn't expect that answer form Brian.

"I'm teasing," Brian said seeing Justin's reaction. "I think it just means that you like to cook a helluva lot more than I do."

"Genghis Khan liked to cook more than you do," Justin chuckled.

"Is that an age crack?"

"If the Gucci fits."

Brian refused to be pissed. Today was too special for anything but happiness. "Or were you inferring that we should roast a pig over a pit in the backyard?"

"Hey, that's what we need to buy … a barbecue!"

Brian groaned. "Can we hold off for a day or two?"

"But once we tell everyone we could have a cookout in the backyard. It might even be warm enough to swim."

"That's something else I have to find out about," Brian said. "I wonder who the pool company is that looks after that fucking thing … and how much it costs."

"Brian?" Justin frowned. "Are we all right … financially?"

"Yes Sunshine, we're fine, but let's not overdo it for a bit."

"Whatever you say, big guy," Justin said sliding onto Brian's lap.

"Maybe we could look for a barbecue next week," Brian whispered in Justin's ear as he nibbled at his lover's neck.

"You are a big softie," Justin said giving him a quick kiss. He tried to stand up and get back to unpacking. Brian held him in his lap.

"Something's not soft," Brian said. Justin could feel Brian's hard cock pushing against his ass.

"So I see, um, feel. Want to christen the kitchen?"

"I thought you'd never ask."

Some time later they lay sprawled across the table, Brian on top of Justin. Their orgasms had been intense.

"Nothing like a new locale to spice things up a little," Brian groaned as he raised his head to look into Justin's eyes.

"Did we need spicing up?"

"Um … no, but it's different doing it here."

"Different how?" Justin asked.

"I don't know. It just feels … different."

"That this is just you and me … and no one else?" Justin asked.

"Yeah," Brian whispered nuzzling the neck beneath him.

"If we go unpack the bedroom we could try out our new mattress."

"We could do that without unpacking," Brian said suggestively.

"We need to make up the bed so we can sleep later."

"I'm not tired."

"But you will be … we will be."

"Not for hours and hours."

Justin giggled. "Come on, honey. We have work to do." He grabbed Brian's hand and pulled him to his feet.

Brian allowed himself to be pulled naked along behind Justin. He knew he'd get what he wanted one way or another. If he had to work a bit first, that was a small price to pay. Once in the bedroom, Justin found the box with the sheets and duvet. He and Brian quickly made up their makeshift bed. When Justin tried to open another box, Brian was all over him. He couldn't help but giggle as Brian nipped at his neck and tweaked his nipples, both of them still naked from their activities in the kitchen.

"Brian, please," Justin panted. "I have to find something."

"What could possibly be more important than my dick in your ass?"

"Let go and I'll show you," Justin said pushing Brian away.

Brian relented and stood back watching Justin rummage through the boxes obviously looking for something.

"Aha," Justin cried finally.

Brian watched him lift something covered in a towel out of one of the boxes. "What is it?" Brian asked not recognizing anything he had packed that looked like that.

"You'll see," Justin said moving over to the niche recessed into the wall opposite where they had told the delivery men to set up the mattress on the floor. Brian knew then what Justin was doing. Carefully Justin unwrapped the towel and placed his sculpture, the one with the intertwining hearts and their rings dangling inside, into the niche. It fit perfectly, just the right size. "It looks perfect there," Justin said standing back and admiring the new showcase for his work.

"Perfect," Brian whispered as he came up behind him.

"Now we can fuck," Justin said turning to kiss Brian. "I like to look at it after we've made love."

"Me too," Brian admitted softly as he pulled Justin into his embrace. "Our first time on the new mattress and in our new bedroom."

"The first of many," Justin said leading them to the mattress.

They both sank down onto the soft surface. The first kiss went on and on neither wanting it to end. They made love slowly caressing and kissing and touching every possible part. When they were finally finished, Justin lay back with Brian cradling him against his chest. They both looked over at the sculpture.

"We made the right decision," Brian said softly.

Justin's smile was radiant. "Yeah," he whispered as his mouth sought Brian's once more.

Domestic Bliss

Moving III

Brian awoke on his new mattress in his new home in the middle of his new life. He nuzzled the back of Justin's neck as the boy slept on, Brian curled against his back. They had been in their new house for three weeks, and what a three weeks it had been. None of their friends knew yet that they had moved. Nobody had gone to the loft looking for them. Brian smiled. He had loved this little island of time alone with Justin as they set up their house and made their first attempts at domestic bliss.

He and Justin had spent the last couple of weeks making their home the way they wanted it. They got the furniture arranged in Gus' room and could hardly wait to have the little boy come and spend the night in his own room. The dining room and the kitchen were all taken care of. The family room contained the futons and the bar cart and the computer desk and the plasma TV, but they had still not been able to find the sofa and chairs that they wanted. The living room sat totally empty.

They had, however, managed to christen each room except Gus' which they both agreed should be left untouched. Justin had been true to his word and had thought up inventive and very satisfying ways to fuck in each room, furniture or no furniture. Brian's favorite had to be the bathroom. The new walk-through shower was a real turn on. Water jetted from all sides and there was lots of room and lots of tile to press Justin up against. Just thinking about it made Brian hard. And then there was the dining room and the spare bedroom and the small room off the master bedroom and the futon in the family room and the tile on the patio outside. Brian knew there were still spots that deserved a proper sample of their fucking skills, but until they were able to get to every nook and cranny they both agreed that they had managed to do justice to most of the house in one way or another.

True to his word Brian had bought a fabulous barbecue that they used almost every night for dinner as spring worked its way towards summer They had bought a table and chairs and a couple of loungers so that they could enjoy the cool spring weather outside. They ate on the patio almost every night.

The service that had looked after the pool since the previous owners had left had been retained by Brian to keep the pool in pristine condition. Justin had volunteered to do it, but Brian wanted Justin to finish off his last weeks at PIFA and get ready for graduation. He didn't want anything to distract his lover.

They had heard from their friends on and off over this period of time. They had had breakfast at the diner with the gang a couple of times. Both of them had been so tempted to spill the beans, but they still didn't have the house the way they wanted it. Their bed would arrive in less than a week. After that they thought they would tell everyone and maybe have a party.

Brian smiled. He knew Mikey would be pissed at him for keeping the house a secret, but he didn't really care. The time alone with Justin had been well worth any subterfuge they had had to carry out. Lindsay wouldn't be too happy either, and Mel would be royally ticked off. Brian smiled wider thinking of how the new house would rankle the bitchy lawyer.

"What are you smiling about?" Justin asked without turning around.

"How do you know I'm smiling?" Brian asked smiling even wider at Justin's ability to read his mood without even looking at him.

"I know these things," Justin said smugly.

"Are you up?" Brian asked. Justin felt Brian's hand explore his morning wood and he let out a little grunt. "I was thinking about how much I like fucking you in our shower."

Justin smiled. "Then what are we waiting for?"

Quite a while later they sat in the breakfast nook sipping coffee and eating scrambled eggs. They each had a section of the morning paper which they now had delivered to the house. Brian looked across the table as Justin munched on his toast and read the Entertainment section.

He wished their life could always be like this - no outsiders, no family, no friends, just them. He thought about the party he knew Justin wanted to have, a kind of housewarming, next weekend. They would have to start inviting people and then there would be questions and negative comments and stares and prying into their lives.

All of a sudden Brian felt kind of funny. He shook his head wondering what had come over him. The image of Justin blurred in front of him. He shook his head again, closing his eyes and trying to clear his vision. He felt his heart pounding in his chest and his breath wouldn't come easily. As he opened his eyes, everything remained out of focus. He felt slightly sick to his stomach.

"Justin," he managed to croak out.

"Brian?" Justin said looking up from the paper and seeing the strange apparition in front of him. "What's wrong?" he gasped as he stood up quickly knocking over his chair and rushing to Brian's side.

"I … I don't know," Brian practically moaned. "Everything's blurry."

"Are you sick? Are you having some kind of attack?" Justin asked feeling Brian's forehead. It felt all right, not overly warm.

"Ummm…" Brian moaned.

"What? Please tell me, Brian. What can I do?"

"Don't know."

"Should I call 911?"

"Fuck, no."

"Then what? What's wrong?"

"Everything went blurry."

"Blurry?"

"Are you having a stroke?"

"Jesus, I hope not."

"What happened just before you felt like this?" Justin asked noting that Brian seemed to be regaining some of his equilibrium. With Justin's hands on him gently holding him Brian didn't seem so out of it or so tense.

"I was looking at you and thinking how great this time in the new house has been. And … and then I thought about the party and facing everyone … and everything started to go blurry."

Justin chuckled trying not to be too obvious. "Is it blurry now?" he asked with as solemn a voice as he could muster.

"No, it got clearer when you came over here."

Justin smiled. "I think you'll be fine," he said softly standing up from where he had squatted down beside Brian.

"You do? But what the fuck happened?"

As soon as Justin heard that, he knew Brian had returned to his old self. "I think it's what's called a panic attack."

"I fucking don't do panic attacks," Brian protested.

"You feel all right now, don't you?"

"Ye…yes."

"Then I bet it was a panic attack."

"Panic about what?" Brian asked.

"Facing the family with our news."

"Fuck! Are you sure it wasn't a stroke?" Brian asked with big, sad eyes staring up at Justin.

"You'd rather have a stroke than face Michael and Lindsay and Melanie," Justin chuckled.

"This is so not funny. And I'm never afraid to face Melanie." A little shudder ran through Brian despite his bold statement.

"Don't worry. I'll be right there beside you," Justin said putting his arms around Brian's neck.

Brian grimaced a bit, but decided not to protest anymore. He nuzzled his face against Justin's belly smelling the scent of the man he loved. It made him feel better. He had a sneaking suspicion that Justin was probably right. Brian had loved this time with just the two of them, and the thought of losing that did bother him … a lot. "Do we have to tell them?" Brian asked.

"You know they're going to figure it out soon anyway. We need to get it over with. We can always lock the doors and keep the world on the other side."

"Promise," Brian said slowly.

"Absolutely."

"Thanks."

"We've got one more furniture store to check out today," Justin said deciding to refocus Brian's attention on something else. "It's way across town out in the suburbs on the west side."

"Do we have to?" Brian asked. "We've been to every fucking store and we never find anything that both of us like." The panic attack seemed to have been forgotten.

"It's worth a try, and who knows, the fifty-fourth store might be the charm."

"Not fucking likely!" Brian snarked.

The furniture store was hard to find even though they had called for directions. Brian was all for giving up, but Justin said that they had come that far and they were going to look at the merchandise. Finally they pulled into a strip mall trying to get their bearings only to discover that the store they were looking for took up the large end unit. Justin took it as a good sign that they had found the store almost by accident.

Once inside Brian had to readjust his thinking. The store had high end furniture ranging from traditional to futuristic. Both he and Justin immediately found some things they liked. They were both drawn to a taupe colored set of leather. There was a large traditional looking sofa with rolled arms, and a matching chair that was huge and oh so comfortable looking. The leather felt like butter and when they each sank into a piece, they knew they had found the furniture for the family room.

"I can even stretch out on this," Brian said smiling and extending his long legs the length of the sofa. "It kind of molds itself to your body. What do you think?"

"I love it," Justin said sitting in the big armchair and feeling like he never wanted to leave it.

"These taupe, black and cream accent cushions look great with it too. We should get them as well. And the end tables and coffee table are not half bad."

Justin nodded and smiled over at his partner. Brian's panic attack seemed to have been forgotten, and that was a good thing. And now they had found their long sought after furniture. Sometimes life was good.

A clerk found them at that moment. Brian forced himself to get up from his comfortable nest and went off to finalize the sale. They were both so relieved to find something they wanted and that they agreed on that there was no point in looking further. The clerk was punching in all the numbers when Brian heard his name being screamed from an adjacent gallery of the store.

"Excuse me," he said to the clerk who just kept punching in numbers.

Brian followed the sound of Justin's voice and found him sitting on a burgundy sofa that looked like it was made of suede. It was square but comfortable looking.

"Brian, I absolutely love this, and … and we need some color in the house," Justin said looking hopefully up at his partner. "And look at the matching plaid armchair. Do you like it?"

Brian looked at the sheer joy on Justin's face. He knew that the set had far more color than he would ever choose, but it was nice and Justin obviously wanted it very badly. "It's nice," he said. "For the living room?"

Justin nodded. "What do you think?"

Brian watched the hope in Justin's eyes. He could live with this. Hell, if Justin liked it this much, he could learn to love it too. "I say that you have very good taste, and I think we should take it."

Brian saw the sunshine smile light up his favorite face, and then he found his arms full of blond. Justin kissed him again and again whispering, "Thank you, thank you, thank you."

The clerk cleared his throat watching the young men. They were obviously a couple. The older of the two was making the purchases, but the young man wielded a lot of influence. "Shall I add these to the total," the man asked with a smile.

"Sounds like a plan," Brian said extricating himself from Justin's embrace but holding on to the hand of his lover.

A short time later and several thousand dollars lighter they walked out of the store the proud owners of two rooms of new furniture. It would be delivered to the house Wednesday of the following week.

Having successfully completed their shopping expedition they decided to find a nice place for lunch. They headed back into the city looking for a likely spot to stop and grab some lunch. Brian wasn't really hungry and kept driving right past each place that Justin suggested.

"Brian, what was wrong with that last place?" Justin asked.

"Looked like a typical greasy spoon. We can get the same thing at the diner without the hassle from fucking bikers."

"I didn't see any bikes out front," Justin protested.

"You never know."

"I'm hungry," Justin sighed.

"You're always hungry."

"So!" Justin demanded. "Can we please stop?"

"I was thinking…" Brian began.

"Thinking what?"

"Why don't we go to the diner? You can pig out on your favorite junk food and…"

"I do not pig out," Justin protested.

Brian snorted. "And Debbie will probably be there," Brian continued ignoring the interruption. "So will Michael and maybe Emmett."

"So what?" Justin asked exasperated by the apparent non sequitur of Brian's thinking. His stomach rumbled ominously.

"So," Brian said like he was talking to Gus. "We can invite them to our big party next weekend."

"We can?" asked Justin in amazement. He figured Brian would fight him on the party idea especially after what happened this morning. "What happened to Mr. Panic Attack?"

Brian scowled at Justin. "I do not have panic attacks," he said sternly.

Justin made a mental note not to bring up panic attacks again unless he was looking for a fight. He already knew better than to bring it up in front of the family. "So you want to have a party?"

"As you said, we might as well get it over with."

"Shouldn't we plan a few things first?"

"Like what?"

"How are we going to invite them to a housewarming party without telling them that we have bought a house? Are you ready for that?"

Brian looked thoughtful for a minute. "We don't have to tell them that it's a housewarming," he said. "We could call it a surprise party. That way we won't get any tacky gifts for the house."

Justin chuckled. There was always some sort of weird method to Brian's madness. This way they wouldn't have to display the tchotchkes that they would be given and pretend that they liked them. "How will we get them there without giving them our address? And you can be sure they will check it out before they come."

"True," Brian agreed. "We could have them meet us somewhere and then we could lead them over to the house."

"Maybe we should make it like a scavenger hunt and then see who could follow the clues to our place," Justin giggled.

"You don't want anyone to come to the party, do you?" Brian chuckled. "I think we need to give them more help than that or they'll never find their way."

"Oh, ye of little faith!"

"I just know them too well."

"So what are we going to do?"

"What if we had them meet us at the GLC?" Brian asked.

"That ought to peak their interest, especially if you ask."

Brian chuckled again. "Yeah, they'll be dying to know what's going on."

"They'll think you've gone off the deep end."

"Some days I think I have too."

"Brian?" It was part question and part accusation. Brian could hear the hurt in Justin's voice.

"I … I didn't mean anything by that, Sunshine," Brian said trying to soften his words. "I meant that I never fucking thought that I would settle down, that I would have a partner … or a house … in suburbia."

"It's all right, dear," Justin said leaning against Brian's shoulder in the narrow confines of the Corvette. "I'll take care of you."

"If I didn't think that was true, Justin, we fucking wouldn't be doing this." Brian sounded totally serious, and Justin realized that he was.

"I meant what I said. I know how many things about your life that you have changed for me … and I appreciate it. Really, I do."

"I didn't change them for you. I changed them for me … and for us."

Brian stared straight ahead. He couldn't look at Justin at that moment. He knew the emotions were too close to the surface … and he was driving for fuck's sake. He felt Justin shift a little and hold tighter to his arm. He felt a soft kiss on his cheek.

"I love you," Justin whispered.

Brian nodded. That was all he was capable of at the moment. They continued to drive in silence for a while.

"So, let's get our story straight," Justin said finally. "We tell them we're having a surprise party, and that they should meet us at the GLC … what, on Saturday night?" Brian nodded continuing to stare ahead. "We meet them there and form a convoy of cars." Brian nodded again. "We lead them to the new house, leap out of the Corvette and yell, 'Surprise!' What do you think?"

Brian snorted. Justin could see that he was regaining his infamous control. "Sounds about right."

"Then let's eat. I'm fading fast," Justin said as Brian slid the Corvette into a spot up the street from the diner.

"Remember," Brian admonished. "That's all we tell them."

"They're going to split a gut trying to figure out what we're doing," Justin smirked.

"I'm going to enjoy every minute of this," Brian said as he strode towards the diner.

Debbie looked up as she heard the bell above the door. Things were settling down. The lunch rush was just about over. She picked up the dishes from the table she was clearing and let out a loud, "Hey, you two! Where have you been hiding?"

"Hi, Deb," Justin said giving her a kiss. "We've been around."

"The guys were all here but they left a half hour ago," she told them.

"Justin's starving," Brian said. "He needs a burger and fries. Right, Sunshine?"

Justin nodded. "And a large chocolate shake."

Brian grimaced. "I'll have my usual turkey sandwich."

"Of course you will," Debbie grinned eyeing them up and down. "Grab a booth."

"Should we tell Deb?" Justin asked as they slid into a booth. "Or should we wait until they're all around?"

"Let's eat first and then tell her. We can beat a hasty retreat when she starts to grill us. That way your stomach won't be rumbling at me all the way home."

"Home," Justin whispered, "our home … and soon everyone will know." He couldn't stop the smile from covering his face.

"You look like a cat who just spilled a pint of cream and lapped it all up before anybody found out," Debbie said as she gave Justin his milkshake and Brian his usual cup of coffee.

"That's exactly how I feel," Justin said continuing to grin. Brian pinched his thigh under the table. "Ow!" He gave Brian a withering look.

"What's up with you two? Something's going on," Debbie said glancing from one to the other.

"Is my burger ready yet?" Justin asked changing the subject and trying to divert Debbie's attention. "I'm so fucking hungry."

"Doesn't this big asshole ever let you alone long enough to eat?" Debbie asked as she went over to the order window to see if she could speed up the process.

"Thanks a bunch," Brian said. "Now she thinks I'm fucking you so often you don't even get to eat."

"She always thought that … and it's true. I never get enough to eat." Brian groaned in response. He could never win.

"Here you go, boys," Debbie said as she set their meals in front of them. "I need to clear a few more tables and then I want to know what's going on with you two."

"Yes, mother," Brian said with a smirk. Debbie grinned at him. She pinched his cheek and then bustled away. He knew she liked it when he called her mother.

Justin was already half way through his burger. Brian took a bite of his turkey sandwich. Sometimes he wished he had Justin's metabolism. That burger looked awfully good. He snatched a French fry off Justin's plate. The boy looked murderously at him, but he dared to take another one. They could always order some more if Justin was still hungry. He'd probably want a lemon bar for dessert anyway.

By the time Debbie was finished with her tables Justin had cleaned his plate and Brian had eaten about half his sandwich and a few more French fries.

"Deb, could I have a lemon bar and a coke?" Justin asked.

"Sure, sweetie," Debbie replied removing his plate and returning momentarily with his requested food.

"Thanks," Justin said taking a bite of the lemon bar. "Want some?" he asked Brian holding the lemon bar an inch from Brian's mouth. Brian thought for a moment and then took a bite out of the end savoring the tangy flavor that exploded in his mouth. Justin chuckled as he took a big bite demolishing almost all of the square. "Hey, Deb," he called. "I need another lemon bar."

Debbie smiled shaking her head at their antics. She loved that Brian was happy and relaxed even if she didn't see much of him anymore. Justin was the best thing that had ever happened to him. And if she was truthful Brian was pretty good for Justin too. They seemed happy.

"Here you go," she said setting down the plate containing the lemon square. She slid into the booth across from Brian and Justin. "So what's up … and don't fucking tell me nothing is."

"We're going to have a party," Brian said with a glint in his eye.

"Ooh, I love parties," Debbie said. "What kind of party?"

"A surprise party," Justin said.

"Oh?" Debbie said looking at them intently. Something didn't seem just right. "At the loft?" she asked.

"No," Justin said. "We've made other arrangements. Meet us at the GLC at seven o'clock on Saturday night and all shall be revealed."

"You're having a party at the GLC?" Debbie demanded looking incredulously at Brian.

"We didn't say that," Brian responded. "We just said meet us there."

"And then what?"

"You'll find out on Saturday night," Brian said. He stood up and gave Debbie a kiss on the cheek. "By the way pass the invitation on to the others," Brian added as he pulled Justin out of the seat.

"Bye Deb," Justin called as they made their way to the door.

"That's all you're fucking telling me?" Debbie yelled.

Brian and Justin smiled serenely back at her as they exited the building.

"The phone lines will be humming any moment now," Brian said. "Let's get out of here."

Justin chuckled as he followed Brian to the car. "I would have liked to play Debbie a little longer," Justin grinned as he got into the Corvette. "She was about ready to explode."

"Didn't anyone ever tell you not to bait a mother bear?"

"No," Justin said. "You don't think she'll be mad at us when she finally finds out about the house, do you?" Justin asked suddenly concerned.

"Remember that panic attack I didn't have this morning?" Brian asked looking knowingly at Justin.

"Shit!" Justin reacted as Brian pulled away.

His worries soon evaporated though as he began thinking about the party and being the host in his own home. "Brian," he started, "will I be the host or the hostess of the party?"

"What?"

"I assume you'll be the host. Does that mean that I have to be the hostess?" Brian glanced at Justin and was about to make a joke. One look told him that Justin was being serious. He bit off the joke before it could escape his lips.

"There's nothing that says a party can't have two hosts. Especially since we'll be working so closely together to pull off this masterpiece of entertainment."

Justin chuckled and then flashed Brian one of those radiant smiles. Brian knew he had said the right thing and he grinned back.

Justin's mind began to check off the list of things they would need to do for their party. There were so many things to be taken care of before next Saturday. He wanted the house to be perfect and they had to decide about food and decorations. This was going to be so great. He could hardly wait.

Domestic Bliss

Housewarming

Justin looked in the fridge at all the food he had bought and/or prepared. There were several salads in enormous plastic bowls. The steaks were marinating waiting to be set on the barbecue. Brian had had a fit when he saw the bill for them, but Justin had insisted that they needed to feed their guests in style. He was not going to scrimp when he invited people to their home for the first time. Butter was sitting on the counter softening next to the bags of buns. Bread was always filling in case they didn't have enough of everything else.

Justin was about to open the freezer door to check on the ice cream they had bought for dessert when he felt strong arms encircle his chest and pull him back.

"Will you relax," Brian whispered in his ear. "Everything is great. The party will be fine." Brian nipped Justin's earlobe and sucked it into his mouth eliciting a moan.

"Look who's talking, Mr. Panic Attack!"

"I did not have a panic attack. Stop saying that."

"I'm sorry. I'm just nervous. I want everything to go well," Justin said sliding around in Brian's arms so he could face his man.

"Everything will be great. Now stop worrying." Brian gave Justin a quick kiss on the lips promising more with the look that followed. "We need to leave. Time to meet them at the GLC."

"Shit, is it time already," Justin asked looking around the kitchen, panic apparent on his face.

"Justin! Come! Now!" Brian ordered.

"I'm not a fucking dog," Justin protested.

Brian snorted. "Come on, Rover."

That earned him a swat from Justin but Brian had a firm hold on one of his lover's hands as he dragged Justin behind him out to the 'Vette. The drive to the GLC took place mainly in silence. They had already planned how this was going to work.

When they arrived Melanie, Lindsay and Gus were already there sitting in their car. As they pulled in so did Debbie's old heap. Michael was driving with Ben beside him. Debbie, Hunter and Vic were crammed in the back seat. Jennifer arrived next with Molly beside her. All they needed was Ted and Emmett. Trust them to be late.

Michael got out of the car and came over to Brian who sat in the Corvette. He knew if he got out he would be bombarded with questions that he didn't want to answer. Justin still sat beside him and he groaned inwardly as Michael approached.

"Brian, what the fuck is going on?" Michael started in. "What are we doing here? What are you planning?"

"All will be revealed, Mikey. Be patient."

"You can tell me. I'm your best friend for fuck sake."

"Michael, you'll find out the same time as everyone else," Brian sighed.

"Isn't that Ted's car?" Justin asked as a car pulled into the GLC parking lot.

"About fucking time," Brian reacted. He pushed open the door of the 'Vette making Michael step back. "Everyone follow me!" he yelled.

The cars started and the headlights came on. There was a chorus of "Where the fuck are we going?" and "This better be good!".

Brian pulled the Corvette up to the exit and waited for everybody to line up behind them. When there was a big gap in the traffic he pulled out, looking in the rearview mirror to make sure all the cars exited at the same time. He started off towards the new house and the surprise that awaited their guests. He felt Justin's hand grasp his arm for reassurance. He looked at his lover and gave a tight smile.

"It will be okay," he said, half for Justin's benefit and half for his own. He hoped he was speaking the truth.

They made their way slowly out into the suburbs. Brian didn't want to lose any cars from his train. He chuckled to himself when he thought that. It reminded him of another kind of train. Justin gave him a quizzical look, but he just shook his head.

Finally they pulled into the driveway. "Ready for the dog and pony show?" Brian asked as he got out of the car.

Justin chuckled. "Bring it on," he said with more bravado than he felt.

Brian helped the cars get situated in the driveway and on the street. He refused to answer any questions about whose house this was or what they were all doing there. When everyone was assembled near the front door, Brian cleared his throat gaining their attention.

"Surprise!" Justin called out. They all looked at the young man like he had two heads.

"Thank you all for coming tonight," Brian said with a smirk. "Justin and I want to welcome you to our housewarming party. Open the door and let the party begin."

There was a collective gasp as Justin unlocked the front door. The whole group streamed in oohing and awing and gawking at the house.

"This is really your house?" Emmett asked Justin, giving him a big hug. Justin nodded. "Oh sweetie, this is wonderful. I can't believe you two made this move." Justin knew he meant 'move' on many different levels. He could hardly believe it himself.

The rest of the group was exploring the kitchen and family room. They all seemed to like the new furniture.

"How long have you guys been living here?" Ben asked.

"Why didn't you tell us, asshole?" Melanie demanded.

"I can't believe you didn't say anything," Michael observed shaking his head.

"Look, a pool," Hunter called gazing out the French doors from the family room.

"We're having a barbecue on the patio if that suits everybody," Brian stated opening the doors and leading them all out to the covered patio area. "And I'm cooking."

The sudden silence and open mouths told Brian that he had had the desired effect. He had been practicing his barbecue skills almost every night since they moved in.

"You're cooking us dinner?" Ted asked in amazement.

"Oh, goodie!" Emmett gushed.

Brian smiled in spite of himself. "I'm going to get the steaks started. Justin will get you all drinks if you head back inside."

Brian felt a tug on the leg of his jeans. He looked down to see a small version of his own face looking up at him. "Dada," Gus said. He looked slightly scared.

"It's all right, Gus. This is where Justin and I live now, and we have a room for you, one of your very own." He picked Gus up sensing the little boy needed further reassurance.

The little boy stared at his father not quite sure what to say or do. "My own room?" he asked repeating Brian's words.

Brian nodded. "Daddy has to cook now, but I'll take you up to see it after dinner," Brian promised. "Would you like to stay with us soon?"

"Tonight?" Gus asked looking into his father's eyes.

"I don't know about that, Sonny Boy, but soon. Want to help me barbecue?"

Gus nodded his head as Brian set him down and lit the barbecue closing the lid to let it heat up.

"Come," Brian said extending his hand. Gus fit his little hand inside the big one and they walked into the kitchen. "You can carry the tongs for me," Brian said solemnly handing them to Gus. Gus carried the long object resting it in his folded arms as he followed his father to the fridge. Brian took out the tray of steaks and flipped them over in the marinade.

"You're actually cooking?" Michael asked as he came over to Brian carrying his bottle of beer.

"I'm actually cooking," Brian replied.

"When did you get so fucking domesticated?" Michael asked with a tinge of incredulity in his voice.

"We all have to grow up some time."

"Not Brian fucking Kinney."

"Michael…" Brian began but he didn't know how to finish that. He wondered why his best friend insisted on trying to keep them both fifteen years old. Michael had a relationship and a foster child. He should be grown up. Why couldn't he allow Brian to move on with his life too? "Come on, Gus, we have meat to roast."

Brian carried the tray of steaks out to the barbecue with Gus trailing behind solemnly carrying the tongs.

"Are you ready for a big boy job?" Brian asked his son.

Gus looked up at him with his large hazel eyes. "Yes, Dada," he said with great sincerity.

Brian handed him a piece of paper and a pen. "I want you to take this to each of our guests," Brian explained. "Their names are listed on the paper. Ask them how they want their steak cooked and get them to write their answer on the paper. Can you do that for me?"

"Yes, Dada," Gus replied solemnly nodding his head. He was very impressed that he was being given such an important job to do for his father.

"Go ask Debbie and Vic first," Brian instructed. "They're over there."

Gus hurried off to where Debbie and Vic sat at the patio table they had by the French doors. Brian watched as Gus made his carefully worded request. He seemed to be using the exact words his father had told him. Brian smiled as Debbie took the paper and wrote down her preference. He turned away to oil the barbecue so he would be ready when Gus returned with his list.

"I've got most of the food set out on the counter in the kitchen," Justin said coming up behind Brian. "Are you ready to start cooking, oh great chef?"

As Brian turned around Justin slipped a "Kiss the Cook" apron over his head. "Where the fuck did this come from?" Brian asked. He didn't wear aprons.

"Every good barbecue chef needs the proper equipment," Justin explained turning Brian around and tying the apron at the back for him.

"Who the fuck told you that?" Brian asked teasing.

"Common knowledge," Justin declared. "I think everything's going great so far."

"They seem happy. Did they each get a drink?"

Justin nodded. "Gus is faithfully making the rounds with his piece of paper. That was a great idea. He loves to be included. Makes him feel like a big boy."

"Everyone seems fine except … Michael."

Justin grimaced and decided to change the topic. "They want a tour of the whole house after we eat," Justin said.

"I guess we can do that. It's probably standard practice for a housewarming party."

"Happy barbecuing," Justin said heading back to the kitchen. Brian waggled his head from side to side and made that "ha, ha ha!" sound that he thought was cute, and it was.

"Brian," Lindsay's voice said from the other side of him as Justin disappeared. "This is a beautiful house. How long have you been living here?"

"About a month."

"A month? And you never told us? What if something had happened to Gus?"

"You would have called us and we have the same telephone number," Brian sighed. He hated it when people tried to guilt trip him.

"I'm surprised you wouldn't tell the mother of your son that you were moving," she persisted.

"Let's not do this," Brian said with another sigh.

"Are you and Justin happy here?" she asked. Something sounded funny about that question. It was almost accusatory.

"So far."

"I'm … I'm pleased for both of you. What happened that made you take this step?"

"What makes you think something happened?"

"I can't see you taking this step voluntarily," Lindsay chuckled.

Brian frowned. "And why the fuck not?" He could feel the anger rising.

"It's so unlike you. You never wanted a relationship … with anyone."

"Well I have a fucking relationship with someone, and his name is Justin."

"Brian, I…"

"Let it go, Lindsay. I don't want to talk about this again."

"Sure, sure," she replied wondering why he had gotten so testy with her. "Can I help you do anything?"

"I'm fine," he responded tersely.

"Brian, I didn't mean to make you upset."

"Of course not," he said the sarcasm apparent in his voice. He continued to fidget with the barbecue dials trying to ignore the feelings of hurt and anger that had suddenly overwhelmed him. This was supposed to be a party. He was supposed to be happy. Why couldn't they just let him be?

"So," Lindsay said trying to return to that breezy quality her voice had when all was well with the world. "When do I get my key?"

"Key? Key for what?" Brian asked.

"Why, for the house, of course, so I can bring Gus over."

"There's no key, Lindsay," Brian said trying to keep his voice steady. "If Gus is coming over Justin and I will bring him or we'll be here when he arrives. Justin and I will be the only ones with keys to our home."

"But…"

"There's nothing more to discuss about it," Brian said putting an end to her sentence.

She gave him a look of such hurt that he almost relented. When he didn't say anything though, she turned and walked away, probably to find her husband and pour out her woes. Brian was sure he'd hear from Melanie before the night was over.

"When do we get to come for a swim?" Emmett asked coming over to Brian.

"We thought it was a little cool tonight, but in a week or two when the weather warms up we'll invite you over," Brian said trying to be extra nice after his confrontation with Lindsay. At least Emmett wasn't asking for a fucking key.

"Oh, I can hardly wait," Emmett gushed in that inimitable fashion of his. "Um … by the way, Brian, I think it's great that you and Justin have made this move."

"You do?" Brian asked turning to face Emmett. He was surprised by that for some reason.

"I know you love him," Emmett said with a smile. "This just shows how much, and I know you're both going to be so happy!"

"Thanks Emmett," Brian said sincerely. "I wish I could believe that."

"You don't think you'll be happy?" Emmett asked in astonishment.

"There'll be happy times," Brian said thinking of all the great times he and Justin had already had in this house during their month alone. "But we don't have the best history of sustaining them.

Emmett looked thoughtful like he was trying to decide the best way to respond to that. "I've always understood that you don't know what happy really is unless there's some sad to compare it too. I see you two having some of each … and that will make the happy times that much sweeter."

Brian looked like he was ready to come out with one of his scathing, sarcastic comebacks. Instead his face softened and he reached out to hug Emmett. "I appreciate that thought. I hope you're right."

When Brian released him, Emmett moved away quickly. He was so surprised at Brian's reaction and hardly knew what to make of it. Somewhere deep inside he knew that he had said the right thing and that Brian really had appreciated it. He smiled as he skipped into the kitchen to get another beer.

"Dada," Gus said tugging at the leg of Brian's jeans. Brian was pulled from his thoughts about Emmett's words and looked down at his son. "All done," Gus said proudly handing him the paper with the list of everybody's preference for their steak.

Brian scanned it and mentally calculated how many medium, rare, and well done he needed to cook. He added himself to the list. "Good job, Sonny Boy," Brian said and Gus beamed up at him. "Can you go tell Justin that I'm starting the steaks?"

Gus nodded and trotted off. Brian started to put the steaks that would be the well done ones on the barbecue.

"So you're finally settling down," Vic's voice said from over his shoulder. "About time."

"You approve?" Brian asked.

Vic gave him a quizzical look. "Do you care whether I do?"

"No."

Vic chuckled. "I thought not. Nice apron," he said with a smirk. Brian grimaced. "Are you happy?"

"What?" Brian asked not sure what would prompt Vic to ask such a thing.

"This is a big move. Are you happy?" Vic repeated.

"Yes," Brian said slowly. "Yes, I am." And he knew that was true. He was happy that they had done this. He was happy that he and Justin were making a life together. And he was happy that his strange little family was here to celebrate with them, and that they would go home when the party was over. Later it would just be him and Justin, just like he wanted it.

"I never thought I would hear you say that, Brian, but I'm very happy that you've reached the point where you can. Justin and you are … lucky. I wish…"

Vic didn't complete the sentence but Brian knew that Vic was thinking about his own life and loves, and how they hadn't worked out quite the way the older man had wanted them to. Brian was glad that he had taken this step, that he had given his relationship with Justin this chance to move forward.

"Don't fuck it up, Brian," Vic said as he cleared his throat and gave Brian a hug.

"I'm trying not to," Brian admitted returning the hug.

Vic turned away, neither of them welcoming the display of emotion that seemed about to overwhelm them. Brian watched the older man walk away. Vic was a good man. He wished things could have worked out better for him, but he seemed to have a pretty good life with Debbie. He was relatively healthy for now and seemed to be enjoying working with Emmett in the party planning business. Brian turned back to his steaks wondering who would be the next one to give their two cents worth. He didn't have to wait long.

"Cool house, dude," Hunter said sidling up to Brian. "I still can't understand what you're doing here with blond boy instead of me."

"Someday it will come to you," Brian said with a smirk.

Hunter looked at him in a funny manner. "You love him, don't you?"

"That's between me and Justin."

"Fuck! I knew it."

"Thanks so much for your input on the matter," Brian chuckled.

Hunter turned and walked away. Brian hoped he hadn't ruined the poor boy's day. Actually he didn't care if he had ruined the boy's day. Maybe this would stop Hunter hitting on him at every opportunity.

The next group of steaks went on the grill. Brian waited wondering who would be next to take him on. They would all have to get their two cents worth in before the night was over.

"What the fuck did you say to Lindsay?" Melanie demanded her hand on her hip and her negative attitude providing a frosty chill to the warmth of the evening.

"I'm sure she told you," Brian said making a face.

"You upset her, asshole."

"That wasn't my intention. I just … told her how things are."

"She's always had a key to the loft, so why can't she have a key to this fucking place?" Mel demanded.

"Because I don't want you two walking in on Justin and me anytime you fucking feel like it."

"We … we never did that intentionally."

"Maybe not, but it sure as fuck seemed like it."

"Fuck you! Why can't you just give her a key?"

Brian sucked in some air. "I'll fucking give her a key when you fucking give me one to your place!"

Melanie recoiled like she had been slapped. Brian knew that would be her worst nightmare, him having access to her place anytime he wanted. Like he'd want to catch them unawares. The thought made him shudder. Melanie turned on her heel and marched away. Brian added the last of the steaks to the barbecue. They'd be ready in a few minutes. He wiped his brow and it wasn't from the heat of the barbecue.

"Almost ready?" Justin asked hooking his arm through Brian's.

"Yeah."

"Everyone's getting their plates and loading up on salad. They'll be out in a minute."

"And when will they be leaving?" Brian asked sarcastically.

"Did … did something happen?" Justin asked frowning.

"No, no, tell them the steaks are ready. We'll talk about it later. Okay?"

Justin took that as a good sign that Brian said they would talk, but he wondered which one of the charming group had pissed Brian off. The possibilities were numerous. About the only one he was sure hadn't done it was Gus.

Steaks were served, refills of drinks provided and seats arranged so that everyone was comfortable. Finally Brian and Justin sat down together on the chaise and started to eat their own steaks.

"These are good, Brian," Justin said his mouth stuffed with a big piece of meat. "You did a great job."

"Thanks," Brian said taking a bite of his very rare steak. It was just the way he liked it.

"The food is fabulous," Ted called over to them.

There was a chorus of agreement which made them both smile in spite of themselves. There was some chatter for the next while, but mostly people just ate enjoying the delicious fare that their hosts had put together.

When everyone was finished eating they all carried their plates into the kitchen where Justin loaded them in the dishwasher. Brian cleaned the barbecue and gave Gus a lesson in the proper care and handling of a top of the line "q". Gus was very attentive and duly impressed with his father.

As Brian finished up his job he heard Justin saying that they would do a tour of the house before they had dessert. "Go find mommy," Brian told Gus. "You can see your new room."

Gus started to run inside but turned back when he realized his father was not coming. "Dada," he said. "Come." He held out his hand. Brian was about to say no but the look on Gus' face made him change his mind.

"Do you want me to show you your room?" he asked knowing what the answer would be. He took Gus' hand and said, "Let's sneak up ahead of everybody else. You should get the first look at it."

Gus skipped along beside Brian as they made their way to the stairs. The rest of the group was giving the living room the once over. Brian held Gus' hand tightly as they climbed the stairs and made their way down the hall.

"Ready?" Brian asked as he stopped in front of the door to Gus' room.

Gus bounced up and down nodding his head. Brian smiled at the enthusiasm and opened the door. Gus' mouth dropped and he hesitantly made his way into the room. The bed had a headboard that looked like box of Crayola crayons.

"Look, Dada," Gus said pointing in amazement.

The bedspread was a brilliant royal blue, as were the drapes. The room was a riot of color. All the furniture was white but Justin had put an accent of color on each piece. There was a little play table and storage box for toys, some of which were already stuffed inside having been brought from the loft. A little easel sat by the window. It could be a blackboard when turned around. The little bookcase was filled with Gus' books from the loft. Gus crawled up onto the bed and found the stuffed rabbit that he often slept with when he was at the loft.

"Mine, Dada?" Gus asked his eyes very big.

"All yours, Gus," Brian said sitting down beside him. "Do you like it?"

"Can I stay tonight?" Gus asked.

"I told you that I didn't think that was possible but next weekend for sure," Brian explained. Gus didn't look very happy about that, but he was too excited about having his new room to get upset.

"Here they come, Gus," Brian said as he heard the noise of everyone coming up the stairs.

Gus hopped off the bed. "Mommy, Mama!" he yelled. "I got a room!" He dashed out the door and soon reappeared dragging his two mothers to see his new room.

"Wow," Melanie said taking it all in. "You did this?" Brian nodded.

"It's beautiful," Lindsay said losing some of her former animosity. "Gus loves it."

The rest of the group had been peering in the door and they all concurred that the room was great for a kid Gus' age. Justin ushered them down the hall to the master bedroom. Brian, Gus, Lindsay and Melanie followed. Gus pulled his rather reluctant father along. Brian really didn't want anyone in their bedroom except them. He hung by the door while they looked around at the furniture, the bathroom and the little room which they had decided would be Justin's work room. Several people looked at the heart sculpture in the niche, but no one said anything. Brian wondered if any of them got it.

As the group started to make their way back downstairs, Brian still leaned by the door.

"Nice digs," Hunter observed.

"That bed looks really comfortable," Debbie said with a smirk.

"That shower is to die for," Emmett crowed.

Ted merely looked at Brian with a sheepish grin and shook his head. Brian decided to say nothing. He wasn't at all sure he wanted to know.

"Nice sculpture," Ben said as he went by. "Very subtle." Brian raised his eyebrows. Ben grinned.

"Are you sure you can afford all this?" Michael asked.

"Yes, Mikey," Brian replied.

"Do you have something for me?" Michael asked staring at Brian.

"No."

"This house is fucking magnificent," Debbie stated interrupting Michael. She gave Brian a smooch on the cheek, and then rubbed off the lipstick she had deposited there.

Finally they were all on their way downstairs. Justin had gone ahead to set out the ice cream and fixings to make sundaes. Brian felt like stepping back in the bedroom and locking the door behind him. He was ready for this to be over. However, he knew his partner was downstairs waiting for him. Justin would never forgive him if he didn't put in an appearance on this important night. He sighed and started down the stairs.

A couple of hours later people were beginning to straggle out. Mel had carried a sleepy and cranky Gus to the car while Lindsay said their goodbyes. Brian had promised Gus he would spend the next weekend and Lindsay wanted to make sure that was a firm commitment. She was planning a little alone time with her husband. The hard feelings over the key seemed to have been forgotten.

Jennifer and Molly kissed Justin and then Brian. "The house looks great and the party was a success," Jennifer said making her way down the front steps. "Call me, sweetheart."

Everyone else expressed their envy of the new house. They complimented Brian and Justin on their decorating skills and on sharing such a great house together. Debbie told Brian not to fuck it up and Vic told Justin he had been a most gracious host. He didn't tell Brian the same thing, but he did wink at him.

Finally all had made their way to their cars except for Michael. He pulled Brian over to the side of the front steps and asked, "When are you giving me a key? I've been waiting all evening."

Brian groaned. "You're not getting a key, Michael. Only Justin and I have keys."

"But…"

"Mikey, we've grown up. You have a home with Ben and Hunter and I don't have a key to it. My home is with Justin and you don't get a key for that either."

"I never thought you'd say that to me," Michael said looking hurt.

"Say what? It's the truth."

"Say that you didn't want me in your life."

"I said no such fucking thing, Michael."

"I … I have to go. Ben's waiting." He quickly ran down to the car and got inside.

Brian ran his hand through his hair as he watched his best friend leave in a huff.

"Thank you," Justin said putting his arms around Brian's waist.

"For what?" Brian breathed.

"For sticking to our agreement. I heard Lindsay making a fuss about the key too."

"And Michael."

"He'll get over it."

"Yeah. Let's go to bed," Brian said heading inside. "I'm glad this fucking night is over."

"It's not over. I have plans," Justin said batting his eyes at Brian.

"Do you now?"

"Oh yes."

They locked the door to their house for which they had the only keys and made their way up to their bedroom.

"Shower?" Brian asked.

Justin nodded and gave him one of those sunshine smiles. They quickly undressed and made their way into the new shower that they both loved. Brian pressed his young lover against the tiles and had his way with him. The release was powerful and satisfying for each of them. It cleansed their bodies and their souls from all the angst associated with the party and the revelation to their friends about their new living arrangements.

As they crawled into their beautiful new bed Brian pulled Justin against him and their fingers entwined. Brian looked over at the sculpture sitting in its niche. Justin followed Brian's gaze.

"Nobody noticed," Justin said with a grin.

"One person did."

Justin's eyebrows shot up. "Who?"

"Ben."

Justin chuckled. "Trust Ben." He was about to add that he wondered how Ben put up with the whiny and dim-witted Michael, but he bit his tongue. Michael was still Brian's best friend, and he didn't want to set Brian off with his criticism.

"Ben is a smart guy," Brian said meaning it as a true compliment.

"Think he'll tell Michael?" Justin asked.

"He doesn't actually know what the sculpture means, although I think he made a good guess. He may keep it to himself, but I don't really care."

"That's good," Justin said untangling their fingers and rubbing his palm against Brian's chest.

"The party went well. You did a great job on everything."

"Thanks," Justin beamed. "What upset you down by the barbecue?"

"Nothing," Brian said. He looked into Justin's eyes and knew his partner wasn't buying it. "They … had trouble believing that I could make this move, that we could start a new life together."

"Why don't they want you to change?" Justin asked with a sigh.

"I'm their idol," Brian chuckled his eyes twinkling.

"You are, you know," Justin replied. "But can't you be allowed to grow up anyway?"

"I'm growing up?" Brian asked in mock disbelief. "Oh no, Wendy, you promised I'd never grow up."

"It's all right, Peter, I'm here to help you through it," Justin promised.

"And a good thing you are," Brian admitted as his lips captured Justin's.

Domestic Bliss

Graduation Approaches

Brian watched Justin hunched over his sketchbook. The young man was in total concentration. Brian wondered if Justin would even hear him if he spoke. He doubted it with his partner so wrapped up in what he was doing.

At that moment Brian wished he could draw. He looked at the side of Justin's face with the strand of blond hair hanging down almost into his eyes. The soft curve of the cheek and the purse of the mouth as Justin concentrated fascinated him. Justin's fingers flying over the page were a source of constant amazement to Brian. If he could capture that look of rapt intensity on paper, he would be happy. It was the essence of his lover. Justin was all creativity and determination and talent and sensuality. He couldn't believe how much he loved this man.

With a sigh Justin stilled his pencil and held the sketchbook out in front of him studying his work. The end of the pencil found its way to his lips and he chewed lightly on it as he surveyed his efforts.

"May I see?" Brian asked from his vantage point.

"Um … sure," Justin said.

He handed the book to Brian. It was Molly. Justin had captured the mischievous glint in her eye and that little telltale hint of humor about her mouth. He had also managed to portray her innate kindness and intelligence. It was a stunning portrait.

"What brought this on?" Brian had to ask.

"I saw Molly after school today. I stopped by mom's condo to talk to her about a couple of things," Justin said keeping his words deliberately vague. He didn't want to get into this with Brian.

"You captured your sister beautifully," Brian said handing back the sketchbook.

"Thanks," Justin replied as he returned his eyes to the sketch, looking at it critically for areas that might need improvement.

"Have you ever done a self portrait?" Brian asked.

Justin snorted. "I've done several. They are mandatory in a lot of courses. I have an abstract one, a monochromatic one, a sculptural one, a truly ugly one in oils. Why?"

"I've never seen any of them," Brian said with a frown.

"And you never will."

"Why?"

"Because I hate them. I hate having to draw myself. It never looks like me. It's embarrassing."

"I don't think anything you do would ever be embarrassing," Brian said truthfully. That was exactly how he felt about Justin's artwork. It was always wonderful and magical to him. He only wished he had such talent.

"Thanks for the vote of confidence, but I still don't like them."

"Will you show them to me sometime?"

"Maybe … if you're a very good boy," Justin teased.

"Oh, I can be very good, or very bad."

"And you're being very bad right now," Justin grinned. "How come you're interested in my self-portraits all of a sudden?"

"I was watching you draw and wishing that I could capture you at that moment."

Justin wrinkled his nose but smiled at Brian. "Really?"

"Really. Have you done a sketch of yourself?"

"Not really. Not one like this one of Molly."

"Do you think you could do one for me sometime?" Brian asked.

"You actually want one?"

"I actually want one."

Justin frowned. "I'll see what I can do," Justin said. Rarely did Brian ask him for anything and he always wanted to fulfill whatever his partner asked for.

"And I don't want an abstract," Brian added as an afterthought.

"The abstract one that I have is actually a pretty good likeness," Justin smirked.

Brian snorted. "I want one of you just like this one of Molly."

"Yes, sir," Justin saluted.

"So what were you talking to your mother about?" Brian asked.

"Shit!" Justin thought. He had hoped to sneak that by Brian without arousing his interest. Unconsciously Justin began rubbing his right hand. It had tensed up after all the time he had been sketching. "I was talking to her about graduation."

"Graduation? That's in a few weeks, isn't it?" Brian asked as he moved over to sit beside Justin on their new leather couch. He took his partner's hand and began gently massaging the muscles. He could gradually feel them start to loosen and Justin sighed in contentment.

"Yep, graduation's on the fifth of June."

"Got your tux all picked out?" Brian asked with a grin.

"It's not like the prom," Justin said with a frown.

"Oh shit! That's not what I meant, Justin. I was just being a wise ass."

"That's okay," Justin said realizing he had jumped to the wrong conclusion. "All I need is to rent the gown and mortarboard."

Brian studied Justin for a minute. "And decide how many tickets you need for the ceremony?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" Justin asked getting defensive. This was exactly what he had been hoping to avoid.

"Were you talking to your mother about inviting your father?" Brian asked as he continued to work on Justin's hand.

Justin shook his head, but he said, "Yeah." Sometimes Brian knew him too well.

"It's okay to want him there, Justin. I don't have to sit with him. In fact, please make sure that I'm on the other side of the auditorium."

"Don't worry," Justin said. "He won't be there."

"Why?"

"It's not Dartmouth that I'm graduating from. All else is fucking irrelevant."

"Is he still hung up on that?" Brian asked.

"That and the fact that I'm gay."

"And that you're with me."

"Mom says he won't even consider coming."

"The rest of us will all be there for you," Brian promised.

"I know, and I appreciate it. I just wish…" There was no point in finishing that statement.

"Come here," Brian said.

"Why?"

"So I can make you forget all about your asshole father."

Brian pulled Justin across his body and found the soft lips that were always eager and ready. He kissed Justin softly at first, gradually deepening the kiss and finally adding some talented tongue to the mix. After a few minutes he released Justin's mouth. They were both gasping for air, chests heaving.

"You have to be the all time greatest kisser on the face of the earth," Justin giggled.

"You're pretty damn good yourself."

"And together we're awesome."

"Awesome," Brian repeated. He wondered if he had actually taken Justin's mind off his father.

"I think I'm ready for bed," Justin said suggestively. "How about you?"

"Bed sounds lovely. Sleep I'm not so sure about."

"Who said anything about sleep?"

They made their way up to their new bedroom and the delicious new bed. Brian tumbled Justin backwards onto the bed and began kissing him again. The intensity of the kisses escalated until they both needed to be naked and joined. Brian began peeling off Justin's clothes kissing and nipping each newly revealed piece of flesh. Justin lay back and allowed his man to have his way with him. He moaned and whimpered as the lips and tongue roused him to a state of near combustion.

When Brian finally released Justin's straining cock from his jeans Justin groaned in relief and whispered, "Please."

Brian smiled down at him and then merely stood up and started removing his own clothes. Justin watched the long, lean body being slowly revealed as Brian divested himself of each piece of clothing. Justin knew Brian was tormenting him with his slow, careful movements. He wanted to leap off the bed and rip all the remaining clothes from Brian's body. Instead all he did was whimper and stroke his aching cock.

"Leave that alone," Brian ordered. "That's mine." Justin reluctantly pulled his hand away from his leaking dick.

Brian smiled that Justin had obeyed his command, and slowly pushed down his jeans revealing his own length hard and ready. He grabbed the tube of lube and slid atop the smaller body. He squirted some lube onto his fingers and pushed Justin's legs up. His finger passed over the pink little pucker causing Justin to rise up with each stroke seeking more.

"Are you ready, graduation boy?" Brian asked with a smirk.

"That's graduation man," Justin stated trying to sound very grown up and in control. His balls ached and his head swam. All he wanted was relief from the handsome man atop him.

"All grown up, are we?" Brian asked in that husky and oh so sexy voice he used sometimes.

"Very grown up."

"Ready for anything?"

"Anything."

Brian's fingers began probing and opening up Justin. Justin grimaced at the sudden intrusion and then rocked against Brian's fingers as the man continued to scissor in and out of his ass.

Suddenly Brian stopped and Justin groaned as the fingers withdrew. Justin's eyes fluttered open as he watched Brian slather lube on his dick and stroke it a few times. Brian grabbed Justin's knees and set them on his shoulders. His cock reached for Justin's hole, the place it knew so well and where they each found such pleasure. He pressed in and watched Justin's face screw up at the initial penetration. When Justin's eyes opened Brian drove the rest of the way home relishing the tight warm channel and the strong arms that clenched his own.

"Ready for your graduation present?" Brian asked.

"More than ready," Justin replied as he drove his hips up forcing Brian even deeper inside of him. He clenched the muscles of his anus and Brian groaned at the constriction.

"Feisty little twat, aren't you?" Brian said through gritted teeth.

He felt Justin relax his grip and he pulled back, only to drive in fully. They continued their struggle for control for a few more strokes. The battle between them only served to heighten their desire and drive them to new levels of ecstasy. They rocked against each other grunting and biting like the animals they were. The rutting continued until they were both dripping with sweat and panting for breath.

"Oh, fuck, Brian!" Justin gasped.

"That's what we're doing," Brian managed to shout as he continued to pound into the willing ass.

"I'm ready to explode," Justin cried.

Brian reached for the thick cock and began to stroke in time with his thrusts. Suddenly he felt Justin's ass squeeze tight around his dick and then they were both lost. Blinding light burst around them and the mattress shook beneath them as the waves of orgasm swept them away.

Some time later Brian rolled off his lover and turned his head to look at the object of his continuing desire and the only man he had ever wanted over and over again. He was sure he would want this man until the moment he took his last breath.

"Happy graduation, Sunshine," Brian said softly.

"Thanks," Justin gasped as the world stopped spinning and he could finally make his eyes focus on his lover. "That was some present."

"For me too," Brian admitted.

"Did you get a present when you graduated?" Justin asked curious.

"You could say that," Brian said thoughtfully. "I got my job at Ryder."

"That's not what I meant. Did you get a watch or a car or something fantastic?" Justin asked thinking of things he might like to receive.

"This is the Kinney family we're talking about here," Brian said with a grimace. "The best present I could get from them is for them to leave me alone."

"They didn't give you anything?" Justin asked surprised that they wouldn't be proud of their son graduating from university.

"They didn't attend the ceremony. I never told them anything about it."

"Really?" Justin could hardly believe his ears.

"Can we talk about something else?"

"Like what?"

"Like what you want for graduation."

"You're going to get me something?" Justin asked with that sunshine smile.

Brian chuckled. "What do you want?" The smile faded from Justin's face. Brian watched the clouds cover the sun and the happiness disappear from that sweet face. "You want your father at the ceremony," Brian said flatly. "I don't think I can give you that."

"I know. You've given me so much already. I have the Jeep and we have this house. And I have you. What more do I need?"

"As long as you have me, I can't think of a thing," Brian smirked.

"You are so bad! But really, I don't expect anything."

"Well, if you think of something that you would like just say so. I have a few shekels still in the bank."

"I'll think about it, but with the house and us together, I don't need anything else."

"Whatever you say," Brian said as he was attacked by the blond twink who had claimed his heart.

-----

A couple of hours later Brian wandered downstairs. He had dozed a bit after he and Justin had finished fucking. His lover was sound asleep in their bed, but something was bothering Brian. That's why he couldn't sleep. He wanted to grant Justin's wish to have his father attend his graduation. Brian knew that Craig's attendance would also mean acceptance of his son, and that was really what Justin was asking for. The only problem was that Brian did not have it in his power to make that come to pass.

Brian flopped down on the sofa and stared at the ceiling. If he couldn't make Craig come to the graduation maybe he could find a great gift for Justin, something that would make his father's absence less significant. The only problem was that Brian had no idea what that gift might be.

He glanced at the coffee table and saw Justin's sketchbook laying there. He reached over and picked it up. He began flipping through the pages. He saw the picture of Molly that Justin had just drawn. It really was very good. He continued to turn the pages. There was Gus, a recent picture of the boy on a swing in the park. Brian smiled. He saw a sketch of Jennifer looking cool and serene, but also full of love. Justin was so lucky to have a mother like that.

Brian turned some more pages and found a sketch of Ted. He wondered when Justin had done that one. Ted looked good. It must be fairly recent, after Ted had recovered from his temporary fling with Emmett. Brian was so glad that they were back to being friends instead of lovers. The whole squee factor of those two being a couple had been hard to bear.

Brian looked thoughtfully at the portrait. Then he walked over to the bookcase and opened a drawer. A stack of Justin's old sketchbooks lay inside. He took out one and flipped through it. Suddenly the idea struck him. Now if he could just get Justin to cooperate he might be able to come up with the perfect graduation present. He closed the sketchbook and pulled the rest of them out of the drawer. This might work.

-----

The next morning Brian helped Justin load his last project for PIFA into the back of the Jeep. It was a multi-media thing about world peace or hunger or something. Brian wasn't sure, but he knew that Justin would have done a good job with it regardless of the subject matter.

"There, all set," Brian said closing the door.

"Thanks for your help," Justin said giving Brian a peck on the cheek.

"That's all I get for my hard work and physical exertion?"

"Poor baby," Justin said. "What would you like as a reward?"

"I don't think we have time for that. I'm due at the office in twenty minutes."

"Later then," Justin said.

"Later. But … um … remember when you said you would do a self-portrait for me last night?"

"Yeah, I remember. You really want one?"

"I told you that I did."

"I'll see what I can do about that," Justin said shaking his head.

"Will there be someone to help you with this thing when you get to PIFA?" Brian asked.

"I'll find someone. See ya for dinner," Justin called as he drove away.

Brian got into the Corvette. He had better get a move on or he wouldn't be ready for his first client of the day.

-----

Justin's graduation was three weeks away and Brian was still trying to arrange the gift he thought might make Justin happy. Justin seemed to have given up on the idea of his father attending and for that Brian was thankful.

Brian had debated going to talk to Craig Taylor, but had finally decided that that would do more harm than good. Every time he and Craig Taylor were in close proximity one of them got injured or thoroughly pissed off. Neither result seemed likely to bring Craig to the graduation.

One afternoon Justin showed up at Brian's office. He was not expected and hoped that Brian might have a minute to talk to him.

"Hey Cynthia," Justin said as he got off the elevator.

"Justin, it's good to see you. Is Brian expecting you?" Cynthia asked.

"No, but I was hoping he might have a minute."

"They're finishing up a meeting in the conference room. They should be out soon. Brian's next appointment is at 4 pm. That gives you almost a half hour."

"That's great," Justin said. "I'll wait in Brian's office if that's all right."

"Go ahead. I'll tell him you're here as soon as he comes out."

Justin walked into Brian's office looking around and assessing the cool, neutral décor. He wondered if he might have an office like this someday. He didn't think that was too likely. He walked around behind Brian's desk and decided to try out his chair. He swung it around and sat down. It was a great chair, so comfortable, and it molded to his body like it was meant for him. He leaned back pretending to be thinking up the next great advertising campaign.

"Planning to steal my job?" Brian's voice caused him to jump and turn back around.

"No, no, but it was fun imagining," Justin admitted with a grin.


"Now that you're finished with school I'll have to keep my eye on you," Brian teased. He shut his office door and walked over to Justin, leaning down and planting a sweet kiss on his favorite lips.

"You always keep your eyes on me," Justin smiled. "That's why I love you so much." Brian made a sort of face, but Justin knew he liked hearing things like that.

"What are you doing here?" Brian asked.

"I wanted to talk to you."

"Couldn't it wait until I come home?"

"It probably could, but I was restless and I wanted to discuss it."

"Discuss what, Justin? I don't have a lot of time."

"I'll get out of your hair," Justin said with a sigh. He stood up ready to leave.

"Don't pull that crap on me. You came all the way down here. Now what do you want?"

"I shouldn't have come. You're busy."

Justin headed for the door. Brian blocked his way. "Justin, I'm not too busy, if this is important. Tell me."

"I got a couple of replies about jobs today and I wanted to talk to you about them," Justin said. "That's all."

"That's great. I assume they were offers by the way you phrased that."

"Yeah, but I don't know what I want to do."

"That's a pretty normal reaction under the circumstances," Brian said.

"I bet you knew exactly which offer you were going to take," Justin said looking directly into Brian's eyes.

"I did," Brian replied, "but that's because I knew I was going into advertising. You sent your resume out to graphics firms, animators, advertisers, art galleries."

"I know," Justin sighed. "I wish I knew what to do."

"You'll figure it out. Wait for a few days and see what offers you get. You don't have to decide anything right now."

"I know, but…"

"Justin, I have to get some stuff ready for the next meeting. Why don't you go say hi to the people in the art department? You can look around and see if you like the idea of working in that kind of environment."

"I interned in an art department for several months." Brian knew that. He was just trying to get Justin out of his hair.

"I know, but it wasn't here."

"I don't know."

"You're fucking starting to whine. Go tell Cynthia to escort you down there. If you're still here when my meeting's over, I'll take you to dinner."

"Somewhere nice?" Justin asked his smile returning at the thought of food.

"No, the diner." Justin made a face. "Of course it will be somewhere nice. We can stay downtown."

"I'd like that."

"We can talk about your prospects over dinner," Brian added.

"I hope I have some … prospects, that is."

"You have the world in front of you, Sunshine. Now get the fuck out of here."

Brian hustled him out the door hoping Justin hadn't noticed the brown paper packages leaning against the sofa. He'd have to get those put away before Justin came back. Brian quickly stuck them all in the closet and headed out for his meeting.

-----

Brian took Justin to a classy restaurant not far from his office. They had steak and salad and Justin had a huge dessert. During dinner they talked about the future.

"I thought it would all be so simple," Justin said.

"Nothing's ever simple. That's the first rule of life."

"It wasn't the first rule of my life," Justin protested.

"Not until you found me anyway," Brian said with a rueful smile.

"How am I ever going to decide?"

This was one of those things that a young man should discuss with his father, if he had a father who would listen and not criticize. Neither of them did. "Do a PMI," Brian said trying to come up with some kind of idea to help Justin.

"What the fuck's a PMI?" Justin asked with a frown.

"Don't they teach you young'uns anything nowadays?" Brian asked.

Justin glowered at him. "I thought I was finally grown up. Kindly stop referring to me as the young'un."

"You'll always be … younger," Brian said deciding not to press that issue. "A PMI is a technique where you make three lists about something you're trying to decide. There is a plus column, a minus column and an interesting column. You list everything about the topic that you can think of under the appropriate column. The resulting lists give a good basis for comparison."

"That actually sounds like a good idea," Justin said.

"Why do you make that sound like I rarely have good ideas?"

"Usually you don't share," Justin told Brian.

"The fuck I don't!"

"The only thing you share willingly is food. That way you can get rid of it and don't have to eat it."

"I share other things."

"Name one."

"I share our home."

"Briiiaaan!"

"All right, maybe I don't share very often."

"Not unless I drag it out of you."

"Am I really that bad?"

"It's not that you're bad, you are … inexperienced."

Brian snorted. "I've had lots of experience," Brian said righteously.

"Let's not go there."

"Anyway," Brian continued, "try the PMI. It might help sort some things out."

"I will. And I'll wait for the rest of the companies where I sent my resume to reply."

"Good boy."

"Brian, do I have to take a job right away?"

Brian studied Justin. He wasn't sure what the young man was getting at. "Don't you want to work? At a real job - not the diner. I thought you were looking forward to independence and incredible wealth and being able to tell me to fuck off."

"I'd never tell you to fuck off," Justin said sincerely. Brian snorted derisively. "I do not!" Justin protested.

Brian snorted more loudly.

"Fuck you!" Justin reacted getting really annoyed.

"There, you just proved my point."

"Asshole! I didn't tell you to 'fuck off'; I said 'fuck you'!"

"A mere technicality." Brian was about to say something else when he saw that Justin was really starting to get mad. The last thing he wanted to do was fight. "Sunshine, you take as much time as you want before you start your career. I want you to be sure about what you're doing."

"Thanks, Brian, I really appreciate that. We're okay with finances, the house and everything, if I don't start a job right away?"

"We'll be fine. Take your time."

"How did I get so lucky to find you?" Justin asked.

"Nobody else would have me. It's only because you're so stubborn that you got yourself this lovely prize." Brian held out his arms indicating himself.

"You are a prize and I wouldn't trade you for anyone else. In fact, let's go home and I'll show you what a prize you are."

"I like the sound of that," Brian said signaling the waiter for the bill. "You better prove your point tonight because we have to pick up Gus tomorrow morning, and he's staying for the rest of the weekend."

"He loves his room so much," Justin said as they walked out of the restaurant.

"It works so much better with him having his own room. He's happier and so am I."

"Me too, but tonight it's just us, and we can be as loud and rowdy as we want."

"Rowdy, I like the sound of that," Brian said squeezing Justin's ass as they made their way back to the parking garage.

Life was pretty damn amazing at the moment.

-----

Brian stared at the phone. He wasn't sure what to do. A part of him knew he had to try, but the other part was screaming "Fuck this!". Reluctantly he looked at the piece of paper on his desk and dialed.

A female voice replied, "Coronet Construction."

"Craig Taylor, please," Brian said with a smile.

"May I ask who's calling?"

"Brian Kinney."

"One moment Mr. Kinney."

Brian was put on hold. He wondered if Craig would take his call. He wondered if he had a hope in hell of convincing the man to come to Justin's graduation.

"What do you want, Kinney?" an angry voice demanded.

"Hello, to you too," Brian said. The urge to slam down the receiver was almost more than he could withstand.

"Tell me what the fuck you want or I'm hanging up."

"It's about Justin," Brian replied trying to keep his voice even.

"I should have known," Craig said sarcastically. "What does he want now?"

Brian tried to control his temper. He knew all the things that Justin had tried to do to make things right with his father, and Craig had rejected every one of them. Brian wanted to tell the miserable bastard to fuck off, but he bit his lip and said, "Justin's graduating in a couple of weeks. He would like you to be there."

"And why are you calling to ask me this. What's wrong with my faggot son asking for himself?"

"He thinks he already knows the answer. Jennifer told him you wouldn't consider going."

"Then if you know that why are you bothering me?"

"Your faggot son would like you to be there. He still loves you, and I hope you still love him enough to be there and support him."

A long and loud sigh greeted that statement. "I've made it clear that Justin's life choices go against everything I believe in. Until he makes other choices there is no reason for us to meet."

"You sanctimonious son of a bitch!" Brian exploded. "I called to try and reason with you, try to appeal to the fact that this is your only son we're talking about, and for whatever misguided reason, he wants you there. He wants to be able to talk to you, to get your advice about his career prospects, to know that you still care about him. But I should have known you don't have an ounce of human decency, let alone kindness or love. So screw you! You'll never hear from me again."

Brian slammed the phone down. He wished it would shatter Craig Taylor's narrow minded view of the world, but he knew that would not be the case. Nothing had changed. He should have known better than to fucking try.

Life was such a crock of shit!

Domestic Bliss

Graduation

"There you go, Sonny Boy," Brian said as he helped Gus climb into his car seat.

"Where's Justin?" Gus asked, as Brian buckled him into the Jeep.

"Justin's a big sleepyhead this morning. He's still in bed."

"Why didn't you tell him to get up?"

"He … needs his rest." Brian wasn't about to admit that they had worn each other out fucking last night. Brian was as tired as Justin, but he had promised to pick his son up early and keep him for the weekend. So here he was while Justin slept in their nice, new bed. Brian's cock got hard just thinking about his blond twink all curled up in their bed, warm from sleep and oh so ready…

"Dada, dada," Gus said tapping his father on the sleeve. "I'm all ready."

Brian shook his head trying to clear it of the sensuous image of Justin in their bed. The man was so going to pay for that later.

"Let's get this show on the road," Brian said as he climbed into the driver's seat.

When he arrived home some time later he could smell food as soon as he opened the front door.

"Waffles," Gus shouted, dropping everything and running for the kitchen. "Justin, waffles!" he shouted.

"That's right, Gus, with fresh strawberries and whipped cream."

"Yum," Gus said climbing up into a chair in the breakfast nook and picking up his fork ready to get started on the waffles.

"They're not quite ready, Gus. Give me a minute."

Gus smiled over at Justin and began to sing, "Waffles, waffles, I love waffles."

"You just made his day," Brian said coming up beside Justin and giving him a kiss.

"I thought it was the least I could do since you let me sleep in."

"Gus wanted to know why I didn't wake you up."

"And you told him it was because I was conserving strength so that I could fuck you senseless again tonight," Justin whispered.

"Fucker!" Brian whispered back, as his cock started to react to Justin's words. "I told him that you were a big, old sleepyhead.

"Sleepyhead, sleepyhead," Gus giggled.

"Be nice, Sonny Boy," Brian cautioned, "or Justin will limit your quota of waffles."

Gus giggled again and started his waffle chant once more.

"Here you go, Gus," Justin said setting down in front of the boy one waffle cut into bite-size pieces and slathered in whipped cream with strawberries on top.

"Yum," Gus said and dug in.

Justin handed Brian a waffle with strawberries and no cream and then took his two waffles covered in everything over to the table.

"How can you eat all that fat?" Brian asked eyeing Justin's plate.

"The whipped cream makes it. Right, Gus?"

Gus nodded, his mouth so full of waffle and berries and cream that he couldn't speak if he wanted to.

"Try a bit," Justin said cutting off a piece and bringing it to Brian's lips. Brian kept his mouth closed but Justin touched his lips with the whipped cream and Brian stuck out his tongue to lick it off. When he did so, Justin popped the bite into his mouth. Brian moaned more in satisfaction than in reaction to all the fat. "You've got cream on your lips. Let me help you," Justin said licking the cream away with his tongue and then kissing Brian who pushed a little of the waffle into his partner's mouth.

"I could learn to love these if you fed them to me this way all the time," Brian said with a smirk.

"Behave, dada," Justin said as Gus watched them between bites.

"Good waffles, eh Gus?" Brian said looking at his son.

Gus nodded enthusiastically and continued to chew.

"What are we going to do today?" Justin asked.

Brian pushed his waffle around the plate. "I thought I'd trim some of that hedge along the side of the house. Gus could help me." Brian watched Justin's reaction.

Justin frowned. "You don't want me to help?"

"I thought maybe you had some art to work on," Brian said in as innocent a voice as he could muster.

"You know I took my last assignment to the IFA the other day."

"Wasn't there something else you were going to do?"

Justin frowned as he struggled to think of what Brian might be talking about. Suddenly the light dawned. "You're not talking about that self-portrait, are you?" Justin asked.

Brian nodded. "You said you'd do it."

Justin groaned. "You want me to draw while you and Gus work?"

"Us men can handle the hedge. Right, Gus?"

"Right, dada," Gus agreed. Whipped cream covered his face as he chewed contentedly.

"So what does that make me? I'm suddenly not one of the men?"

"Of course you are, but it will be bonding time between Gus and me. You can give me the portrait as your graduation present," Brian said with a smirk.

"Asshole," Justin mouthed at Brian. "I thought the graduate was supposed to get the gift, not the partner."

"We can start a new tradition."

"You are nuts!" Justin said gathering up their dishes. "Fine! Go! Get out of my kitchen! Leave me all alone to fend for myself. Make me slave away while you two have all the fun. See if I care!"

"Come on, Gus," Brian said wiping the cream off his son's face. He took Gus' hand. "Justin's having a major queen out. Let's go outside where it's safe."

Justin snorted loud enough for the two of them to hear. Brian chuckled and Gus giggled as they made their way outside.

Brian got the large clippers from the garage and the garbage bin in which he would get Gus to put the pieces he trimmed off. Brian snipped and handed the piece to Gus who deposited it in the container. The system was working quite well until Brian went to hand a piece to Gus only to find no sign of the little boy. A moment of panic swept over Brian.

"Gus!" he yelled. "Gus!"

"He's over here," a voice said from the other side of the hedge.

Brian raced around the hedge and found Gus standing just on the other side watching a black man working at painting a lawn chair.

Gus," Brian said bending down and scooping up his son. "How many times have I told you not to leave my sight?"

"Sorry, dada," Gus said wrapping his little arms around his father's neck.

The black man stood up and came towards them. "I saw him standing there, but I didn't want to frighten him. I could hear you clipping the hedge," the man explained.

"I hope he wasn't bothering you. He was supposed to be helping me with the hedge. Weren't you, Gus?"

Gus nodded, and looking at the man he said," Hi."

"Hello, Gus. I'm Marcus Egerton," the man said extending his hand to shake Gus'. "But you can call me Mark."

Brian set Gus down and shook Mark's hand too. "Nice to meet you. I'm Brian Kinney."

"I haven't seen this little guy around since you moved in," Mark said.

"He doesn't live with me. He lives with his mothers."

"Are you divorced?" Mark asked.

Brian had deliberately used the plural form of mother hoping Mark would get it, but apparently he didn't. This could prove difficult. "We were never married. In fact," Brian said deciding not to beat around the bush, "Gus has two mothers and two fathers. We're gay." He waited for the reaction. This had been one of the down sides of moving to the suburbs. There were very few gay couples, at least ones that lived openly. Brian waited to see how this nice man would react. In a minute he might not be so nice.

"Oh, I see," Mark replied. "Then the young blond man is your partner?"

"Yes, he is." There didn't seem to be any hostility in his words. "His name's Justin."

"Well, it's nice to finally meet you. People in this neighborhood are very private and very busy. You hardly ever see them."

"I've noticed that," Brian replied. He had thought the neighbors were keeping their distance and that had been all right with him. He never knew his neighbors in the loft building on Tremont and he didn't care about knowing them here. Mark seemed all right though.

"I … I'm going to barbecue tonight," Mark said rather hesitantly. "Would you and your partner and this little cutie pie like to join us?" Mark smiled at Gus who grinned back at him.

Brian was surprised by the invitation. He wondered if it was a good thing to get friendly with the neighbors, but he also knew that Justin would be pleased to be invited to dinner. "Shouldn't you ask your wife?" Brian asked with a smirk. "I know they get testy about surprise guests."

Mark laughed. "You're right. If there's a problem, I'll let you know. Otherwise, come over about six."

"Sure," Brian said. "I better get back to work on that hedge."

He and Gus walked back around the hedge and finished up the trim job. When they went in for lunch Justin had sandwiches and lemonade ready for them.

"Did you men have a good time?" Justin asked pointedly.

"We met the neighbors," Brian said with a smirk.

"You did? Why didn't you call me? I'd like to get to know them too," Justin said disappointed that he hadn't been included. "When did you get so fucking friendly anyway?"

Brian glanced at Gus and looked warningly at Justin because of his choice of words. He could tell that Justin was pissed at having been excluded from the hedge cutting and then missing meeting the neighbors. "Blame it on Gus," Brian said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Justin said ripping at his sandwich in his frustration. He chewed ominously as he waited for Brian to answer.

"Gus went around the hedge and I thought I had lost him. I had a moment of panic and I hollered Gus' name. Mark, our neighbor, said Gus was over there. That's how we met."

"You let Gus wander off?" Justin said in an accusatory tone.

"He only went around the end of the fucking hedge," Brian retorted.

Justin gave back the warning look that he had received a moment before. "So what are the neighbors like?" he asked.

"I've only met Mark. He seemed quite nice. He's probably in his late forties, black, not fazed by the fact that we're gay."

"You told him that?" Justin asked in amazement.

"He wanted to know why he hadn't seen Gus around before, and one thing led to another. I didn't see any point in keeping it secret."

"I suppose," Justin said thoughtfully.

"Oh, and we're invited to a barbecue over there at six."

"Tonight?" Justin asked. Brian nodded. "You do work fast."

Brian snorted. "I think Mark liked Gus a lot more than he liked me."

"That Kinney charm!"

"Is it working on you yet?" Brian asked hoping he was out of the doghouse.

"Maybe," Justin said some of his equanimity returning.


"How did you make out with your drawing?"

Justin wrinkled his nose. "I got started but I never like drawing myself."

"Can I see?" Brian asked.

"No."

"No?"

"Not till it's done."

"Will that be soon?"

"I'll try," Justin said with a sigh.

"Thanks."

Justin stared at Brian as he continued to eat his sandwich. Something was going on. Brian had never been this interested in his sketches before. He knew Brian liked his work, but this request for a self-portrait was out of character. He wondered what Brian was cooking up.

Brian could see the wheels turning and he thought he better distract Justin right away. "How about we go shopping after lunch?" he asked. "I'd like to get a new shirt for the barbecue tonight."

Justin chuckled. "A Hawaiian one like Vic wears?"

"God no! Just something new. You could use one too."

"Me too, dada," Gus chimed in.

"God, you've made him into a retail queen already," Justin chuckled.

"Retail queen, retail queen!" Gus chanted.

"I am so dead," Brian groaned knowing what Mel and Lindsay would say when they heard that.

-----

They returned from shopping in time to don their new shirts and get ready for the barbecue next door. At six o'clock they headed out to go around the hedge and meet their neighbors. Justin marveled that Brian was actually on time for this.

"Hey, Mark," Brian called as he stepped around the hedge and saw his neighbor at the barbecue.

"Brian, and Gus, and you must be Justin," Mark said with a big grin.

"Gwen, come on out here and meet our guests," Mark called to his wife who was in the kitchen.

A striking woman with blond hair and a lean figure stepped out of the kitchen. She was older than she appeared at first glance. Brian estimated her to be about Mark's age but very well preserved. She was white which surprised both Justin and Brian.

"Hi, I'm Gwen," she said shaking their hands and showing a warm smile. "It's nice to meet you all finally."

"You too," Justin said. "Thanks for inviting us to dinner."

"You're welcome. We're just barbecuing some salmon and I've made some salads."

"Sounds great," Brian said. That was exactly the kind of meal he liked. "I'm trying to learn to barbecue," he added.

"Brian's gotten quite good with steaks," Justin offered.

"Maybe I could show you what I'm going to do with the salmon," Mark said, "after we get some drinks."

"Let me help you," Brian said.

Brian and Mark went into the house while Gwen indicated some seats for Justin and Gus.

"He's a sweet little boy," Gwen said to Justin. "Is he your son?"

"No," Justin said with a grin. "He's all Brian."

"I thought so, but I didn't want to offend anyone."

"You don't have to walk on eggshells around us," Justin said. "We've heard it all."

"That's good to know," Gwen said. "I'm used to eggshells though. Mark and I have been married for twenty-one years. Being an inter-racial couple hasn't been easy over the years."

"I can believe that," Justin said knowing all too well about prejudice.

Brian and Mark returned with beers and a juice for Gus. They had a pleasant evening. The food was delicious and Brian thought he would like to try salmon on the barbecue the way Mark had shown him. Gus was on his best behavior and played the little gentleman until he started to get tired.

Brian and Justin learned that their neighbors had lived in this house for eight years. Mark was an executive with General Electric. They had two children, a son and a daughter, both of whom were away at university.

When Brian decided they better take Gus home to bed, they had all learned a great deal about each other. They found that they liked similar things and that being neighbors seemed like a pleasant thing. To Justin's surprise Brian asked Mark and Gwen over to the house for Justin's graduation party which was in a couple of weeks. They said they would be happy to attend.

Overall they had a great evening, and Justin was determined to make the end of it just as great, as soon as Gus was fully asleep in his own room.

-----

Graduation day dawned bright and warm. Brian tickled Justin into wakefulness and then gave his graduation boy an exuberant morning fuck. After that they showered and got ready to go to Jennifer's condo. They would all go to the ceremony in Jennifer's car and then come back to the house for an afternoon get-together in celebration of Justin's achievements. The whole gang would be there. There would be swimming for any who wanted to, and then Brian would barbecue dinner. Their neighbors would also attend.

As Justin came down the stairs followed by Brian, Brian grabbed his partner's hand and pulled him into the foyer. Justin looked at Brian in surprise. Brian gestured to the opposite wall. Justin turned and his eyes got very large and then filled with tears.

"Brian," he whispered.

"Like it, Sunshine?" Brian asked softly.

"How did you do this without me knowing?"

"I put up the hooks yesterday while you were out, and you may have noticed how I took us to the back door every time we went in and out since. I put these up last night after you fell asleep."

"I can't believe you did this," Justin said surveying the wall in front of him.

The curved wall of the foyer was filled with sketches of "the family". Brian had taken a portrait of each of their friends and family, had them framed at work and had arranged them on the wall. In the center was Justin's self-portrait that he had finished a few days earlier. To balance the arrangement Justin noticed that there were several of Brian although each different, one with Gus, one with Lindsay, and of course one of Justin's patented head shots.

"Do you like it?" Brian asked.

"I … I love it. Now I know why you wanted the self-portrait."

"There's one thing I wasn't sure about," Brian said as he moved to the front closet and pulled out one more frame. He kept it turned away so that Justin couldn't see what it was.

"Is that the sketch of your dick?" Justin asked with a grin remembering that Brian had bought his sketch from his first art show at the GLC. He had meant to hang that in their bedroom. He'd have to do that soon.

"No, it isn't my dick. I think that one should be somewhere a little more private."

"What is it then?"

"This," Brian said turning it around. "I didn't know whether you would want it up there with our friends and family. But … he is family."

Justin stared at a sketch of his father that he hadn't seen for years. "Where did you get all these?" he asked but he was actually thinking about what to say about the sketch of his father. He was still Justin's family, even if he didn't want anything to do with his son.

"I went through all your sketchbooks and picked ones I liked. I hope you approve of my selections."

"I do," Justin said. "I always knew you had good taste. Are you asking if I want this picture of my father to be hung with the rest of them?"

"I am."

"Even though he's the jerk of the century?"

"He's your father and this is your present. You decide."

"And you'll be all right with it if I want him up there?" Justin asked gesturing to the wall of pictures.

"I don't have to look at him. There's enough other ones to attract my attention."

"Have I told you how much I love you lately?"

"Once or twice," Brian said softly.

"Then let's stick the old asshole up there somewhere. Maybe the others can shame him into acknowledging his only son."

Brian quickly removed the sketch of him and Lindsay and replaced it with the one of Craig Taylor. "He doesn't look too out of place up there."

"We better get going," Justin said feeling sad that the only way he was likely to se his father on his graduation day was in that portrait.

They quickly went out to the car and headed for Jennifer's.

-----

The graduation ceremony was almost over. Being a T for Taylor meant Justin was near the end of the long line of students. Justin walked across the stage with the designation magna cum laude added to his name. He had achieved that despite the bashing and the problems with his hand and all the turmoil in his life. He smiled out at the audience and could see the flashes from Brian's camera. He figured the pictures would be too far away but he knew the most important thing was having Brian, Jennifer and Molly in the audience rooting him on.

At the conclusion of the ceremony Justin hustled through the crowd to find Brian. He threw himself into his lover's arms and received a big kiss in return. Jennifer had a warm hug and kiss for her son and even Molly deigned to give her brother a heartfelt hug of congratulation.

As Justin released his sister from the hug he noticed the look on his mother's face and followed her line of vision to see his father standing not far away.

"You came," Justin said speaking to his father but not moving towards the man.

Craig took a few steps to bring him closer to his son. He held out his hand to shake Justin's and Justin took it willingly. He wished it was a hug but this would do. It was better than anything he had expected. "Congratulations, son," Craig said.

"I didn't think you were going to come," Justin said looking into his father's eyes.

"I wasn't going to, but someone told me some hard facts and I … I changed my mind." Craig's eyes met Brian's for a fleeting second.

"I'm glad you came," Justin said softly.

"Would you like to come back to our home for the little celebration we've arranged for Justin?" Brian asked.

Justin's jaw dropped open at Brian's words. It took Justin a moment to get over his surprise. "I'd like it if you would, Dad," Justin stated wondering what had brought about these monumental changes.

"I guess I could come for a little while," Craig said hesitantly.

"That's great, Dad," Justin said.

"I could ride with Daddy and show him the way," Molly volunteered.

"Are you sure you know the way?" Jennifer asked.

"I'm not a baby, Mom," Molly said indignantly.

"We'll see you there in about an hour," Justin said hopefully as Molly and his Dad moved away.

"Happy, Sunshine?" Brian asked.

"I can't believe it, Brian. Thanks you for inviting him to the house. Do you think he'll come?"

"Sounded like he intends to," Brian replied.

"I can't believe it," Justin repeated.

"Let's go home and get ready for your party." Brian put his arm around Justin's shoulder and they began walking towards the parking lot.

Jennifer watched them for a moment before she followed. She smiled slightly. Craig had called her furious about Brian's phone call. She had told him that Brian had done the right thing and that if Craig had an ounce of fatherly concern left in his body, he'd get his homophobic ass to the graduation. She had provided the ticket.

-----

Some of the family had arrived. Brian and Justin had made sure they had drinks. Gus was there with his mommies holding court for everyone. The doorbell rang and Justin looked hopefully towards it. Brian went to see who was there. It was Mark and Gwen.

Brian welcomed them and took them into the kitchen where they got a drink from Ted who was bartending for this event. Justin came over to welcome them and Brian asked him to make the introductions to the other members of their group.

Brian moved back out into the foyer sipping a beer. He would stay near the front door until all their guests had arrived. Lindsay was looking at the wall of sketches.

"They're not bad," Brian said with a smirk.

"That's high praise coming from you," Lindsay replied. "Did you do this for Justin?"

"What makes you think I did it?"

"Justin hates to draw himself and here he is front and center," she said indicating the self-portrait. "This has all the hallmarks of a Kinney campaign."

"It was his graduation present," Brian said softly.

"Including this?" she asked pointing to Craig.

"He came to Justin's graduation."

"He didn't?" Lindsay's mouth hung open in amazement. "That must have pleased Justin so much.

Brian nodded. "He should be here any minute, if he keeps his promise."

"Craig? Here? I don't believe it."

"He said he would come. Molly's with him. She's supposed to be giving him directions here. I hope he doesn't just go home. Justin's…" Brian looked out by the pool to see if Justin was watching the door waiting for his father to appear. "Justin's got his heart set on it. The son of a bitch better not let him down."

"Why do I think you have something to do with this?"

"Me?" Brian asked trying to look innocent.

"You, you big lug," she replied hugging him tightly. "I'm so proud of you."

"Don't you mean you're proud of Justin? He's the one who graduated."

"Him too." Lindsay smiled.

The doorbell rang and Brian went to answer it. The door swung open to reveal Molly and her father. Molly smiled at Brian. Craig looked grim. Brian decided to try to be gracious. He knew how much Justin was counting on this.

"Come on in," Brian said. "Welcome to our home."

"You've come up a cut or two from where you were before," Craig said giving the place the once over. Brian knew the house was spectacular and tried to keep his smirk to himself.

"Daddy, look!" Molly said staring at the sketches on the wall. "There's me and you and Gus and Justin and Brian and Mommy…" Her voice trailed off as she studied the group of sketches.

Craig looked at his portrait there among all the others. That was the last thing he had expected. He was sure he was persona non grata as far as Kinney was concerned, and he could hardly believe that this man would allow his portrait in his house, no matter how much his son might want it. "I can't believe you allowed Justin to hang a portrait of me in your house," Craig said shaking his head.

"Justin didn't hang it. I did. I hung it for him … in our home," Brian said pointedly. Craig just stared at him not knowing what to say to that. "Let's get you guys a drink," Brian said heading for the kitchen.

The party went well. The new neighbors seemed to get along with everyone and several people went for a swim. Emmett was the hit of the party with his tangerine Speedo. Gus swam and jumped in. His swimming skills had improved so much since that first trip to Justin's uncle's cottage. Jennifer watched Craig warily willing him not to make a scene. Justin was so happy he was there that she wanted it to go well. Craig didn't stay long but he had a little chat with Justin before he left.

When the last guest finally left, Brian locked the door behind them and pulled Justin into a long, passionate kiss. "I want to fuck the new graduate of Pittsburgh Institute of Fine Arts. Let's go to bed."

"Brian," Justin said holding back.

"What?"

"My father said you called him. Thanks."

"I just wanted you to have the best day of your life," Brian said truthfully.

"I think that was the day I met you. All else pales in comparison."

"Thanks," Brian said with that crooked grin. "What did your father say to you before he left?"

"I told him about the job offers and my … indecision. He said I could talk to him about them if I wanted. We're going to have lunch tomorrow, if that's all right with you?"

"He's your father, Justin. Do what you want to do."

"I told him about the PMI and how that had helped. He said you were a smart man."

"No shit! A compliment from Craig Taylor. Will wonders never cease?"

Justin grinned. "He loved the house too. He told me how you set him straight that it was our home, not your house." Brian raised an eyebrow. "Thanks for all this, the party, the sketches, my father."

"You give me too much credit."

"You don't get half the credit you deserve."

"Let's go to bed," Brian repeated feeling rather self-conscious.

"I owe you a lot."

"You don't owe me anything, but you could show your appreciation anyway."

"I bet I know just how to do that," Justin grinned.

"I bet you do too."

They switched off the lights and made their way up the stairs.

Domestic Bliss

I Love You

"Mama," Gus said, "how do you write 'I love you'?"

"Why do you want to know that, sweetie?" Lindsay asked looking at what her son was doing on the coffee table.

"I need it," was Gus' answer.

"What are you making?" Lindsay asked squatting down beside her son.

"Something for Dada and Justin," the four year old replied.

"What is it?" Lindsay asked studying the piece of stiff paper that held various chunks of plasticine.

"A card," Gus replied matter of factly.

"Tell me what you've made," Lindsay requested wondering what it was supposed to mean.

"That's the lake where Dada and Justin took me a looooong time ago." Gus pointed to the blue blob on the paper.

"It wasn't that long, sweetheart," Lindsay said with a chuckle. For Gus it must seem like forever but it was only last summer. "What else do you have there?"

"That's the cabin," Gus said pointing to a brown blob. "And there's the dock. We watched the sunset and Dada and Justin stuck their feet in the water. I want to see if my feet will reach. I'm taller now," Gus stated emphatically.

"Yes you are. Where do you want to put the 'I love you'?"

"Here and here," Gus said pointing to two spots not completely covered with plasticine.

"What do you think about putting the 'I love you's' inside a heart?"

"Oh yes," Gus gushed and clapped his hands.

Lindsay cut out two little hearts and inside each she printed 'I love you'. She helped Gus with the glue stick and they placed them on the card with the plasticine. "That looks good, sweetie. Daddy and Justin will love it."

Gus smiled. He picked up a marker and on the only remaining space on the paper, he carefully wrote a squiggle. Lindsay watched as Gus' face scrunched up in concentration. His little tongue came out the corner of his mouth and he frowned as he diligently made his mark, just like they had practised so many times before. "All done!" Gus said with a big smile.

"What is that?" Lindsay asked although she was pretty sure she knew.

"I signed the card. See," Gus said shoving the card towards her.

"G for Gus," Lindsay said. Gus nodded proud of his efforts. "But it's upside down," Lindsay said looking at the way they had placed the 'I love you' hearts."

"That's okay. Dada and Justin will know it's from me."

"Yes," Lindsay said with a laugh. "I'm sure they will. When do you want to give this to your daddy?"

"Now!" Gus said emphatically.

"Daddy's at work."

"Now!" Gus repeated frowning and getting that look of impending tantrum.

"What if we call daddy and ask him if we can bring the card over tonight?" Lindsay suggested.

Gus nodded pleased that he would be able to talk to his Dada right away. He waited patiently while Lindsay dialed. He also tried to remember the pattern of buttons that she pushed. He might want to call his Dada all by himself.

"Hi Cynthia," Lindsay said into the phone. "It's Lindsay, and I have someone here who wants to talk to his Dada right now." Lindsay laughed and waited smiling at her son.

"Brian? I'm sorry to disturb you, but Gus is an impatient little cuss today. I'll let you talk to him." She handed the phone to Gus.

"Dada?" Gus asked holding the phone and doing his best to look grown-up.

"Hey, Sonny Boy, what's up?" Brian asked with a smile.

"I made you something. Can you come get it?"

"I … I'm at work, Gus. I have a meeting in a few minutes."

Gus frowned. "But it's very important," Gus said his bottom lip trembling.

Brian sighed. "Put mommy back on for a minute," Brian said softly.

Gus handed the phone to his mother and laid his head down on the coffee table. He wasn't going to see his Dada. His Dada was going to let him down … once again.

"Brian," Lindsay began, "I suggested that I bring Gus and his gift over after dinner tonight. Would that be all right?"

"That works for me. In fact," Brian said thoughtfully, "why don't you bring his stuff and he can stay all night. I'll take him to preschool in the morning."

"Just a minute," Lindsay said. "Gus, Daddy wants to know if you would like to spend the night with him and Justin."

Gus sat up, a smile playing at the corners of his mouth. He nodded vehemently.

"I think that's a yes," Lindsay laughed. "I'll bring him over after dinner."

"See you both then," Brian said. "Oh, and put Gus back on for a moment."

"Dada," Gus said.

"I can't come over now, Sonny Boy, but we'll have fun tonight. Okay?"

"Okay, Dada."

"See you tonight," Brian said and hung up the phone. He had to get to his next fucking meeting with the art department, but he needed to remember what was important to a four year old. Sometimes that took precedence over business.

-----

Lindsay and Gus arrived as Brian and Justin were finishing dinner.

"You're just in time for some ice cream," Justin said to Gus.

"This is for you and Dada," Gus said as he extended his arms. He held his somewhat fragile card on the palms of his hands like a tray.

"What's this?" Justin asked.

"Bring it here, Sonny Boy," Brian said sitting at the table and beckoning to his son.

"He worked very hard at getting this just right," Lindsay said with a smile.

Brian took the card and set it gently on the table. He studied the blobs of plasticine trying to make sense of what Gus had made. He lifted the little boy onto his lap and thought about what he could say. Suddenly he remembered Justin's rule about asking the artist what his work meant. "So, Sonny Boy, tell me all about your card."

Gus smiled up at his father. He liked explaining everything. Sometimes adults just didn't understand. "This is the lake where we went with Justin a loooong time ago." His little finger pointed to the blue blob and then moved to a brown blob. "And this is the cabin. Do you remember, Dada?" Brian nodded and smiled. That had been a great trip despite his initial misgivings. "And there's the dock."

"Gus wants to see if his feet will touch the water now," Lindsay said smiling at her two favorite boys.

"He does, does he?" Brian smirked beginning to understand the method to Gus' madness.

Gus nodded his head and continued. "Those are the trees and that's the barbecue where we cooked the fish, and there's the sun," Gus added pointing to a yellow blob.

"The sun?" Brian asked.

"Remember, Dada, the lake went pink, but I didn't have that color," Gus explained with a frown.

"Sunset," Justin said with a wistful look. "It was beautiful."

"Yeah, it was," Brian admitted noting the look on Justin's face. "And what's this?" Brian asked pointing to the hearts.

"The 'I love you's'," Gus said emphatically.

"The 'I love you's'?" Brian repeated.

"I love you, Dada," Gus said, "and I love you, Justin."

"That's sweet, Gus," Justin said leaning over to give Gus a kiss.

Brian watched and wondered why he had never written "I love you's" to anyone in his life. At least his son wasn't deprived of that. "Thank you, Sonny Boy," Brian said kissing Gus on the cheek.

Gus scrunched around and wrapped his little arms around his father's neck. "Can we go there this summer?" Gus whispered into his father's ear.

Brian chuckled out loud. Here he was getting all sentimental and verklempt and his son was playing him. Brian looked up at Lindsay and saw the knowing look on her face.

"Gus has his methods for getting what he wants," Lindsay observed with a smile. She was waiting to see what Brian would do.

"You know, Gus," Brian began, "that cabin belongs to Justin's uncle. We'll have to ask him if we can come for another visit this summer. He might not have any space for us."

"Yes he will!" Gus stated emphatically. "I know he will."

Brian sighed. This wasn't going to be easy. "Justin, do you think you could ask your uncle about us using the cottage for a weekend?"

"I'll try. It's the least I can do for someone who tells me they love me," Justin said with a wink at Gus and a knowing look at Brian.

Brian saw the look and realized that he didn't say, "I love you," very often to his partner. Maybe there was a lesson here that he needed to learn.

"I need to go," Lindsay said. "Mel's getting a chick flick at the rental store. We're having popcorn and a movie and undoubtedly a make out session to follow."

"Way too much information!" Brian said as Lindsay headed for the door.

"Gus' bag is by the front door. Make sure he gets to school on time," Lindsay called.

"Mama," Gus yelled slithering down from Brian's lap. "I love you!" He flung himself at Lindsay's legs and she hauled him up kissing his cheek and his forehead and his lips.

"Love you back, baby," Lindsay said.

"I'm not a baby," Gus objected.

"I know, sweetie," she admitted. "Just don't grow up too fast."

Gus gave her a quizzical look and then squiggled his way down running back to the table where Justin had set out a bowl of ice cream for him. "Bye, Mama," he called and then dug into the ice cream.

Lindsay waved and headed out the door.

"So," Brian said, "what made you think about the cabin?" He really wanted to know. He could hardly believe that Gus even remembered that trip. He didn't notice the look that Justin gave him. Justin knew that if Gus had been distracted by the ice cream, it was better not to bring up the cabin again. Let sleeping topics lie.

Gus had his mouth full of ice cream. After he swallowed enough to breathe he said, "I'm a big boy now. I want to fish and walk in the woods and put my feet in the lake."

"But you already did all those things," Brian replied obviously not getting the point.

"No, Dada, my feet wouldn't touch the water."

"What?" Brian asked.

"When we sat on the dock to watch the sunset, my feet wouldn't touch the water. Now they will."

"How can you be so sure?"

"I just … know," Gus said as he finished up his ice cream. He lifted the bowl and held it out towards Justin. "All done."

"Thanks, partner," Justin said taking the empty bowl. "Why don't you go play in the family room? I need to talk to your Dada."

"What?" Brian asked as soon as Gus disappeared.

"I'll try to get the cottage," Justin said, "but my uncle and his family may not have a time available. What do we do then?"

"We could rent some place else on the lake," Brian suggested.

"You'd do that?" Justin asked with a frown.

"Sure, why not?"

Justin stared at his partner. Sometimes Brian surprised him even after all this time. The fact that he would take the time and spend the money to fulfill Gus' wish didn't surprise him, as much as the fact that Brian was willing to take the initiative in the whole thing. Usually it was Justin who had to take the lead, make the plans, and then somehow cajole Brian into doing whatever it was. This was a new wrinkle.

After a minute Justin shrugged and went to load the dishwasher. Brian went to see what Gus was doing in the family room. As Brian entered the room he could see immediately that Gus was nowhere to be found. "Gus!" Brian called. There was no answer. "Gus!" Brian said even louder feeling panic rise. The first thing he thought of was the pool. He ran to the patio doors finding them closed and locked. There was no little boy lying face down on the water. Brian felt his heart rate slow down a little bit as he realized Gus had to be somewhere in the house. "Gus!" he shouted at the top of his lungs. He stood still and listened. He could hear giggling from the dining room. He quickly made his way towards the sound of laughter. "Where are you?" Brian demanded standing in the doorway and not seeing Gus anywhere. He heard more giggling from under the table. "What are you doing down there?"

"I'm in my fort," Gus said peeking out at Brian from between two chairs.

"Your fort?" Brian asked.

"Come on in, Dada. You can help me talk to the dragon."

"You have a dragon to talk to?" Brian asked. "Aren't you scared?"

"He's really a nice dragon and sometimes he does scare little boys. He won't scare me though."

"Then you don't need your Daddy's help," Brian said.

"He's very big, Dada. Come help me."

"Should we get Justin too?" Brian asked. He saw Gus nod. "Justin," Brian called turning to find his partner standing behind him watching what was going on. "Gus needs our help."

"So I see," Justin said getting down on his knees and crawling under the table. Brian followed suit drawing a strange look from Justin.

Once they were all firmly ensconced under the table Gus told them to be very quiet so they could hear the dragon when he decided to come get them. They waited in silence with Gus saying, "Sh," every few seconds. He held his finger to his lips. Brian and Justin looked at each other and smiled. Finally Gus sat up straight and said, "Here he comes."

"Which way?" Justin asked. Gus pointed to the side of the table.

"Mr. Dragon, don't be mad," Gus said. "We love you."

"You love the dragon?" Brian asked his son.

"If we don't love him, who will, Dada?" Gus asked

"You've got me, Sonny Boy," Brian replied sarcastically. That earned him a poke in the ribs from Justin. "Ow!" he protested.

"Sh, or you'll scare the dragon," Justin told him. Brian glared at his partner.

"The dragon says his name is Hector," Gus contributed.

"Hector?" Brian snarked. "What kind of name is that?" He got another poke from Justin.

"It's a very nice name, Dada. You shouldn't make fun of dragons."

"Sorry, Sonny Boy," Brian replied watching the wheels in Gus' head turn.

"Hector says his throat is very dry from the fire. He wants some ice cream to cool it down."

"He does, does he?" Brian asked.

"I'll get him some, Gus," Justin volunteered. "Should I bring four spoons and then we can help Hector eat it." Gus nodded enthusiastically. Justin crawled out from under the table and went to the kitchen for ice cream.

"Hector says he will give us a ride on his back after he has his ice cream," Gus told his father.

"I can hardly wait," Brian replied.

Justin crawled back under the table with a bowl of ice cream. He and Gus and presumably Hector dug into the ice cream.

"Eat, Dada," Gus ordered. "There's too much for Hector. We have to help him."

Brian ate a couple of mouthfuls and then watched his two boys polish off the rest of it. "Does Hector feel better now?" he asked.

"Much," Gus replied. "Let's go for a ride."

"This I've got to see," Brian said waiting to see how Gus could pull off flying around the room on an imaginary dragon.

"Lift me up, Dada," Gus commanded as he slid out from under the table. Brian crawled after him. "Hector's very big. You have to lift me up."

Brian picked up his son and held him above his head. The little boy slid onto Brian's shoulders. "Go, Dada," Gus cried kicking Brian with his feet to get him started.

Then Brian understood Gus' methods. Brian was the dragon and Gus was going to get his ride around the house. Brian ran from room to room ducking in the doorways so Gus didn't hit his head. He bent and swooped like he imagined a dragon in flight would. Gus squealed and cried out in excitement and a little bit of fear at racing around so high up from the ground. Brian made three circuits through the house. As he headed into the family room the last time he lifted Gus from his shoulders and tossed the little boy onto the soft cushions of the sofa. Gus landed with a startled cry that turned into wails of delight as he bounced a couple of times.

"Thanks, Hector," Gus called. "I'll see you tomorrow." He waved at the imaginary dragon.

"Where's Hector going?" Brian asked still panting from his exertions of flying Gus around the house.

"Hector's tired. He has to go home and take care of his babies."

"He has babies?"

Gus nodded, "Five."

"Wow, busy dragon," Brian reacted, "and prolific."

Justin chuckled. "It's always sex to you, isn't it?"

"That's life," Brian observed finally getting his breathing to slow down. "I need to cut down on those damn cigarettes if I'm going to play with Hector."

Justin laughed and gave his silly partner a kiss. "That would suit me just fine."

"So, what's next on the agenda?" Brian asked.

"Ice cream," Gus yelled.

"I think you've had enough ice cream for one night, Sonny Boy. Besides, Hector isn't here to help us eat it."

Gus looked slightly upset.

"How would you like to watch 'Mary Poppins', Gus?" Justin asked. He knew it was one of Gus' favorite movies.

"Yay," Gus cried clapping his hands. Ice cream was all but forgotten.

Justin put the movie in and they all sat on the sofa watching the classic tale. After a bit Gus snuggled down putting his head on Justin's lap and Brian got up and went to the kitchen. By the time the movie was just about over Gus was almost asleep but fighting to stay awake till the end. Brian had not returned. Justin frowned wondering what Brian was doing. He would have liked to go find the man but he had a little bundle curled up against his leg and he didn't want to disturb him.

When the movie was finally over Justin picked up a sleepy Gus and went looking for his father. Brian was nowhere to be found on the main floor. Justin carried Gus up the stairs and called for Brian. The man came out of their bedroom and took his sleepy son.

"Run the bath, will you, Justin," Brian asked. "I'll get his clothes off and bring him in."

Gus whimpered a bit preferring to crawl into bed without a bath. Brian knew they would have a hard time in the morning if he didn't have his bath now. He carried the naked boy into the bathroom where Justin had the water all warm and ready. Brian sat his son down in the tub and started washing gently with the soap.

"Where's Ducky?" Gus asked waking up now that he was in the water and had something to occupy him.

"I haven't seen Ducky lately," Brian replied. "Justin, do you know where Ducky is?"

"Right here," Justin said coming back into the bathroom. "He was visiting our tub. His usual playmate wasn't here, so Daddy had to keep him company."

Brian glowered at his partner and mouthed, "You'll pay later."

Justin laughed and helped Ducky swim circles around Gus. Gus giggled and splashed and enjoyed his bath. Then they had trouble getting him out of the tub. Finally Gus gave Ducky a kiss, told him that he loved him and let his father lift him out of the tub into the big fluffy towel that Justin held out to him.

They managed to get Gus into his pajamas and tucked under his covers. The boy was quite wide awake by this time. "Story, Dada," Gus said looking up at the two adults with wide eyes.

Brian groaned. He was no good at making up stories. He looked to Justin for help, but his ever helpful partner just shrugged.

"Dada," Gus said. "Once upon a time…"

Brian wracked his brain trying to think of a story he could use. "Once … upon … a … time," he said slowly buying some time. Then it came to him. "Once upon a time there was a friendly dragon named Hector."

Gus smiled and snuggled down into his bed. He obviously liked how this was starting. Justin grinned and settled on the end of the bed to hear what Brian was going to say.

"Hector was a very big dragon with five little baby dragons that he had to look after. Hector loved the babies very much," Brian said as he brushed Gus' hair back from his forehead.

"Like you love me, Dada?" Gus asked.

"Just like that. One day Hector was out getting ice cream for the babies. He flew over the lake and … and saw Ducky swimming in the lake all by himself. Hector flew down to get a drink of water because being a fire-breathing dragon made his throat very dry."

Gus giggled and closed his eyes.

"Ducky was surprised to see a big dragon so close and tried to swim away. Hector called to Ducky and told him not to be afraid. He was looking for ice cream, not ducks, to take back to his babies. Ducky told Hector that his friend Gus always had ice cream and would share with him. Hector thanked Ducky and flew off to find Gus."

"He's asleep, Brian," Justin whispered.

Brian leaned in and kissed the cheek of his son. "I love you, Sonny Boy," he said before he stepped away.

"I love you too, Gus," Justin said giving the sleeping boy a kiss before he turned out the light and went to join Brian downstairs.

"I think I'd like an early night," Brian said as he put the "Mary Poppins" DVD back in its case. "How about you?"

"I could be talked into it," Justin said with a smile.

"If you get the lights, I'll check the front door and meet you in the bedroom."

"Deal," Justin said.

They each did their jobs and quickly made their way upstairs.

"I'm going to take a quick shower," Justin said. "Care to join me?"

"No, no thanks. You go ahead. I'll be waiting for you when you come out," Brian said.

Justin frowned. It wasn't like Brian to turn down a dual shower. He went into the bathroom and Brian went to his desk where he had been working on something while his two boys had watched "Mary Poppins". He pulled out his special creation and added one more thing. He smiled to himself as he carried it over to the bed.

He grabbed three flat sheets out of the linen closet and tossed them over the metal frame that connected the tops of the four posts of their bed. He adjusted them until he had made a cozy and completely private area inside. He undressed quickly as he heard the shower go off. He crawled inside and closed the opening by pulling the sheet back over it. He picked up his special surprise and sat cross-legged on the bed holding his surprise.

"Brian?" he heard Justin say. "What's going on? Where are you?"

"I'm in here?" Brian said with a grin. He adjusted his surprise. "Come join me."

Justin slowly pulled back enough of one of the sheets that he could see Brian. He giggled when he saw the man sitting in the middle of the bed holding out a paper flat on the palms of his hands. He looked so much like Gus from earlier in the evening.

"What are you doing?" Justin asked dropping his towel and crawling in naked to join his lover.

"This is for you," Brian said seriously.

"It is?" Justin asked taking the piece of paper.

He studied the blotches of color and the three words inside a hand drawn heart. He wondered what Brian was trying to tell him.

"Tell me about your drawing," Justin said softly.

"This is the lake where we went with Gus a loooong time ago." Justin chuckled. "This is the cabin and the dock where we dipped our feet in the water."

"Ahh, I remember it well."

"And what's this?" Justin asked pointing to the "I love you".

"That's what I don't say to you nearly often enough," Brian admitted. "It took my son to remind me of that tonight."

"It's lovely," Justin said touched.

"I've never made an 'I love you' card for anyone before," Brian admitted.

"Really?"

Brian nodded. "I was … happy that Gus can do it so easily. He loves you and me and Lindsay and Mel and the whole gang and even Hector."

"He loves everybody," Justin agreed.

"In his world even dragons are kind and friendly because we love them. I thought it was time I told you that too. I wouldn't want you to forget that I love you."

"I'll never forget," Justin promised leaning in for a kiss that lasted for quite a while.

"There's a couple of other things on there that you didn't notice," Brian said pointing to the paper.

"Oh," Justin reacted. He studied the paper. "What's this inside the cottage?"

"It's our rings," Brian said softly.

"But why…? Oh my God! You had them with you at the cabin?"

"I wanted to give them to you that weekend but the time just didn't seem right."

"Those rings sure have a checkered history," Justin said shaking his head.

"Yeah."

"Are you suggesting that we start wearing them now?"

"Not unless you feel a great need to do so. I like them in the sculpture."

"Then why are you telling me this now?" Justin asked puzzled.

"I guess I want to be more like my son. He teaches me stuff every day that I'm with him." Justin nodded. "Smart little fucker, isn't he?"

"And a loving one, just like his Daddy," Justin said with tears in his eyes.

"I hope I can live up to his example," Brian said placing his hand over his heart.

Justin was still looking at his card. "What's this down at the bottom?"

"That little yellow thing?"

"Yeah."

"That's Ducky. If you didn't like the card or the sentiment, I was going to say that Ducky made me do it," Brian stated his tongue pushing out his cheek.

Justin burst out laughing. "Trust you to cover all your bases."

Brian smirked at him. "But I'll take all the credit since you seem to like it."

"Like it! I love it. And I love you," Justin said throwing himself at Brian and tumbling them both back onto the bed. "Are you going to fuck me in your lovely little fort, big guy," Justin said with a sexy grin.

"My plan exactly, as long as you agree," Brian replied as his lips captured Justin's.

"It's the least I can do for someone who tells me they love me," Justin giggled as Brian kissed him again.

Domestic Bliss

Work and Play

Justin threw open the front door and raced into the house. "Brian! Brian!" he yelled at the top of his lungs. There was no response, but Brian's car was in the driveway. He must be home. Justin ran through the house and out to the pool. Brian was wiping off the lawn furniture scattered around the pool. "I got the job!" Justin cried and flung himself at Brian.

Brian caught the flying blond and pulled him against his body. His lips kissed Justin's warmly and then he chuckled. "This is indeed good news. Now I can be kept in the manner to which I would like to become accustomed."

"Asshole," Justin said affectionately as he swatted Brian in the chest.

"Is it the job you wanted?"

"Computer animation with the Hartford firm," Justin said with a huge smile on his face. "My first real job!"

"Good going, Walt," Brian said.

"Who's Walt?" Justin asked with a frown.

"Walt … as in Disney. Jeez, you youngsters are so uninformed."

"I know who Walt Disney is," Justin protested. "I just didn't know that you did."

Brian raised his eyebrow. "I know everything."

"Or so you'd have us believe," Justin smirked. "How are we going to celebrate?"

"Hm, let me think. How be I take you upstairs and rip off your clothes and fuck you into the mattress?"

"You'll do that anyway. I thought we could go somewhere nice," Justin said with a coy smile.

"You did, did you?"

"Can't we? Please!"

"Are you paying?"

"Fuck! All right, I'll pay," Justin griped. He just wanted a nice time and for Brian to show some appreciation for all of his hard work. He stared at the concrete that surrounded the pool, not wanting to look at Brian right at that moment. Silence descended around him, and finally he looked up to find himself alone. "Brian?"

"I'm in here," Brian said from the kitchen.

Justin stepped through the patio door and was greeted with one of those noisemakers that unfurl when you blow in them and make decidedly rude noises as well. The tip of it hit him in the cheek. He shrank back before Brian grabbed him.

He looked up and burst out laughing. Brian was wearing a little, purple, glittering, cone hat perched on the side of his head and held on with a little band of elastic under his chin. He looked so adorable that Justin giggled out loud before the noisemaker hit him in the throat. Brian released him and placed an identical, albeit pink, hat jauntily on the side of Justin's blond head.

"Brian, you had all this ready?"

"I did. I knew you'd get the job."

"How did you know?"

"Because you're a fucking genius when it comes to art."

Justin basked in the glow from those words before he softly said, "I love you so much."

"Of course you do," Brian said with his tongue in cheek. "I'm just so loveable."

"You are, you know."

"So, can I fuck you into the mattress now?"

"Any time, big boy!"

Brian chuckled. He looked at his watch. "We don't have time. We have to get dressed."

"Dressed for what?"

"We have reservations at Emile's for seven."

Justin's arms came around Brian's neck and he pulled his lover down for a sweet and demanding kiss. "You are going to get so lucky at Emile's … that is, if we have a private room."

"Oh, we do."

Justin smiled. "I thought you weren't going to celebrate this at all, and here you've done all this, made all these arrangements."

"Only the best for my newly employed partner." Brian smiled without a trace of a smirk. That made Justin feel even more special. He loved to hear Brian state their relationship, like it confirmed it on some verbal level that was even more special than the visceral level they both understood.

An hour and a half later they walked through the front door of Emile's. Emile, himself greeted them.

"Bonsoir, mes amis."

"Bonsoir," they replied.

"It's good to have you here, Monsieur Kinney. It's been too long."

"I agree," Brian said with a smile. "I've been busy lately, but we're celebrating Justin's new job."

"Ah, bien sur. Congratulations, Monsieur Justin. A bottle of champagne awaits you in your room."

"That's very gracious of you," Justin said holding firmly to Brian's hand and illuminating the foyer with his brilliant smile.

They made their way upstairs to their private room. Shrimp cocktail waited for them in dishes of ice. A bottle of unopened champagne was chilling in a bucket.

"This is so great!" Justin said reaching up to kiss Brian's cheek.

"And you expected … what?"

"I didn't really expect anything," Justin admitted.

"You know that I've always said I celebrate achievement. This is a big achievement. I'm proud of you … and you should know that."

"I guess I do, but it's awfully nice to hear it out loud every once in a while."

Brian stared into the eager blue eyes and resolved to tell Justin how special he was more often. "Let's eat those shrimp while they're fresh," Brian said with a smirk.

They sat down and dug into the shrimp. After he had eaten several Justin picked up a nice juicy, fat one and waved it near Brian's lips. Brian's tongue came out and took a swipe as the shrimp passed by. Justin felt his dick harden at the site. He let out a little groan as he placed the shrimp against Brian's lips. Brian sucked the top in and bit off a big piece. When Justin drew the remains back Brian picked up a shrimp off his dish and fed it slowly into Justin's mouth. Justin bit down and then smiled back at his lover as he chewed the delicious morsel.

"Yummy," Justin said as he licked his lips.

"Something else looks pretty yummy from where I'm sitting."

"And what might that be?" Justin grinned.

"You," Brian said as he stood. He pulled Justin up from his seat and into a long, searing kiss. "I'm going to fuck you between each course," Brian whispered against Justin's ear. His hot breath made Justin shiver, or maybe it was the anticipation that Brian's words engendered.

"I'm done with the appetizer," Justin said with a nervous giggle. He felt like a silly little virgin all of a sudden.

"Then let's get started," Brian said shoving Justin against the wall. He yanked down Justin's expensive dress pants without unbuttoning them. Justin held his breath waiting for the rip that didn't come. He let out a sigh of relief. His trousers were still intact. "Step out of them," Brian said against the back of Justin's neck.

Justin did as instructed kicking his trousers aside. He felt Brian lean against him and the man's hard cock pressed against his bare ass. He moaned feeling his own hard dick trapped between himself and the wall.

"Spread 'em," Brian ordered.

Justin stepped back slightly, bent at the waist and spread his legs apart. He heard Brian growl and smiled to himself. Brian liked to top, Brian liked to be on top, but Justin knew who had a lot of the control in this relationship. He shoved his ass back farther and heard another growl. Oh yeah, he had control … almost.

Brian's dick rammed into him and all control was forgotten. The perfect cock that he had worshipped in so many ways and so many times rolled across his prostate and Justin moaned … loudly. He had control, he could make Brian do whatever he wanted, but all he wanted was Brian to fuck him … hard.

"Harder," Justin said through gritted teeth. "Oh God, harder."

"Dirty little boy, bossy bottom, newly demanding worker in the stream of the American industrial complex." Each word was punctuated with an astounding thrust that made Justin rise up on his toes.

"What the fuck are you talking about?" Justin gasped as he felt his orgasm creeping through his system. Every nerve was snapping and crackling, and his blood was racing and his eyes started to roll up in his head. "Oh, oh, oh, fuck! Fuck! Fuck!"

Brian thrust hard and they both exploded.

Some moments later Brian pulled out and gently kissed the back of Justin's head. "That was fan-fucking-tastic!"

"Absolutely," Justin agreed taking some deep breaths. "But I think between the main course and dessert it will be your turn."

"Oh, you do, do you?"

"Uh huh."

"We'll see," Brian said as he cleaned them up. "I need some sustenance before we do anything else."

"What did you order?"

"It's a surprise."

"I love surprises," Justin said as he adjusted his clothes. "Remember I had escargots here for the first time."

"I thought about ordering those again, but I kind of felt like shrimp. I hope that was all right."

"They were delicious, a good choice."

Brian pushed the button indicating they were ready for the main course. It would appear in a few minutes. He popped the cork on the champagne and poured them each a glass.

"Variety is always good," Justin said with a lustful look. He fully intended to have Brian for his dessert.

A little tap at the door indicated that the main course had arrived. The boys had straightened their clothing and lolled on the Victorian couch that stood to one side of the room. They looked very presentable as their waiter entered. He was a swarthy looking man with an obviously well developed body. He had Latin good looks, but not exactly the type that either Brian or Justin favored. However, neither would turn down someone who looked like him. The waiter risked a glance at the two beautiful men sprawled on the couch sipping champagne.

"Good evening, Gentlemen. I'm Jorge, your waiter for the evening."

"Jorge," Justin and Brian replied.

Brian smirked and winked at the man. He immediately noticed the activity in the waiter's trousers and smiled to himself. Justin noticed the smile and followed Brian's line of vision which led him directly to Jorge's crotch. He barely stifled the groan that escaped his lips. This was supposed to be his night, his celebration, and his partner was flirting with the fucking waiter.

Brian felt Justin stiffen and glanced at the man who had been leaning against him. He could tell by the small groan and the eyes locked forward that Justin was not a happy camper.

By this time Jorge had laid out their main course. He said, "Duck a l'orange, garlic mashed potatoes and asparagus with Hollandaise. If there's any other service I can provide, please feel free to ask." The innuendo embedded in his words was not lost on either man.

"Thank you, Jorge," Brian said standing up. "That will be all."

Justin glanced at Brian who gave the waiter a shake of his head. Jorge bowed slightly in acknowledgement of the rebuff and slunk out the door.

"Are you sure you don't want to call him back?" Justin asked with a tinge of bitterness in his voice. "He was blatantly offering."

"It doesn't hurt to look."

"Sometimes it does," Justin said honestly.

"If it does, then I'll try to cover my eyes," Brian said feeling a little put upon when he had just turned down a very good offer.

"How come you ordered all this fattening food? Aren't you eating?"

"Yes, I'm fucking eating!" Brian felt his anger rise. He had done absolutely nothing except try to make Justin happy, and now all of a sudden he was in the doghouse. "I thought they were your favorites."

"They … they are," Justin admitted softening to Brian's hurt expression. "I'm just surprised that you are having them too. Wouldn't they make you a steak and salad?"

"Of course they would. I thought it would be fun if we ate together tonight, but I guess I was wrong." Brian threw himself back onto the couch and downed the rest of his glass of champagne. He immediately poured another and started in on it.

"Brian, don't. Don't get drunk. I don't want to fight with you."

"You could have fooled me," Brian sulked.

"Come and eat the dinner while it's hot," Justin said in a soft voice. He reached for Brian's hand and tried to pull him up from the couch. Brian resisted at first and then allowed himself to be pulled upright.

"This is supposed to be your night, Justin. I wouldn't do anything you don't want to do," Brian said sincerely.

"I know, but you were looking right at his dick, and he was hard."

"And it was a good size too," Brian smirked.

"Yeah," Justin admitted. "Is that supposed to make it better?"

"Doesn't it say something that I turned him down without a thought?"

"Oh, you had a thought!"

"Yeah, I guess I did," Brian chuckled. "But it's been so long since I fucked anyone else that I'm not sure I'd remember how to do it."

"They say it's like riding a bike. You never forget."

"Are you trying to make this even harder?"

"I'd say things were hard enough," Justin said with an evil grin. He reached down and gave Brian's cock a squeeze.

Brian groaned. "Let's eat the four hundred and seventy-two thousand calories in this lovely meal."

"Let's," Justin said with a grin. He sat down at the table and dug in. "Yum, this is delectable."

"And so are you," Brian said leaning in for a kiss and a little bit of Hollandaise sauce from Justin's lips.

Justin smiled one of his best, and Brian sat down to cover the tent in his pants that that smile could always engender. Justin looked at his duck and sliced off a piece, but he knew exactly what he had done. Brian was softening up or hardening up, as the case may be. He'd have his way before long.

Surprisingly Brian ate quite a bit of the heavy meal. Justin finished all of his and allowed Brian to give him some from his plate.

"That was scrumptious," Justin said with a satisfied lick of his lips.

Brian chuckled. "No shit!"

"Well, it was. Emile makes the most delicious food in the whole world."

Brian shook his head and let out a little snort.

"What?" Justin asked.

"Emile doesn't cook any more. He'd be flattered that you think his food is the best in the world, but he would know that's not true."

"I don't care. I still think it's the best."

"Like you have anything to judge it by."

"This from the great world traveler."

"Well, I've certainly traveled more than you."

Justin frowned. "That's true, but we could start to rectify that, couldn't we?"

"Meaning?" Brian smirked.

"Meaning that we could take some trips. You know to Europe. The capitals of the world."

"You start your job on Monday. Shouldn't you work for a week or two first before you ask for months off to travel?"

"I didn't mean immediately," Justin conceded. "Maybe at Christmas we could go somewhere. I'm sure they'll give me some time off by then."

"Undoubtedly," Brian said with just a touch of sarcasm.

"I'm ready for dessert." Justin decided to change the subject.

"I've ordered that too."

"Not that kind of dessert, but I will want that later."

"And just what dessert did you have in mind for now?" Brian asked knowing full well what Justin was hinting at. He was prepared to acquiesce, but he had to make Justin work for it first. Wouldn't want the boy to get too smug.

"I told you what I wanted for dessert," Justin said batting his eyelashes.

"Twat," Brian scoffed. "You'll have to do better than that."

"I can do much better," Justin said with a grin.

"Show me."

Justin knew he had won. His smile widened and he pulled Brian over to the couch. He pushed Brian down and slid onto his knee. His lips caressed Brian's gently and then more insistently. He felt Brian's mouth open and he delved with his tongue. His hands were working on the buttons of Brian's shirt and he almost had it and Brian's jacket off the shoulders of the man when he felt Brian push him away.

"What?" Justin asked staring at Brian with wide eyes. He better not be turning him down.

"My leg's gone numb," Brian said shifting Justin's bottom to a new position. "Must be all the extra weight from that duck a l'orange.

"Asshole," Justin said seeing the twinkle in Brian's eye.

Justin shoved the clothes from Brian's upper body and started undoing his belt. His tongue licked down Brian's bare chest and sucked on each nipple as he worked Brian's trousers down his legs. He felt Brian lift his hips to enable Justin to pull his underwear off. Brian's beautiful cock leapt free. Justin let out a little slurp of satisfaction at the sight of it already stiff and leaking.

"I knew you wanted this," Justin whispered.

Brian snorted. "You seem to know everything now that you've joined the ranks of the employed."

"That would be correct," Justin smirked. "Although I knew most everything before as well. Turn over and kneel on the couch."

Brian raised an eyebrow, but then did as he was told. The low, antique settee put Brian's ass at just about the right level for Justin's own straining dick.

Justin blew across Brian's pucker causing shivers along the man's spine. He used his tongue next to lubricate and probe the tight muscle. Next his fingers stretched and lubed and finally he was ready to enter.

"Ready?" he asked kissing along the raised area of Brian's spine.

"Yes, you little asshole," Brian said. "Get on with it."

Justin chuckled. He knew he had deliberately prolonged readying his partner to drive Brian crazy. Sounded like he had succeeded. "Good things come to those who wait," Justin whispered against Brian's ear.

"Use that goddam thing of yours because I've waited long enough to cum."

Justin smiled and eased the tip of his cock into Brian's ass. Brian tensed at the initial stretch. Justin waited till he felt Brian relax. He drove in further hearing Brian groan at the twinge and the stretch. When he was fully embedded he leaned against Brian's back.

"Thank you for all this, for everything. I never thought you'd make such a big deal of this job and I want you to know how much it means to me."

"Show me," Brian commanded pushing back and causing Justin to thrust involuntarily.

"Fuck!" Justin reacted. He had just lost control. He began to plow Brian's ass following the thrusts and squeezes that Brian initiated from his end. Apparently Brian knew about being as much of a bossy bottom as Justin did.

Justin didn't last too long. He rarely was the top in their relationship and he found it difficult to delay his orgasm. The heat and silk of being captured in Brian's ass was always too much. He had to come. He jerked Brian off mercilessly trying to make him come first. That didn't happen but Brian wasn't far behind him.

They lay entangled in the sheet that they had thrown over the antique couch when they first sat down. Justin turned so that he could look at Brian's face. Hazel eyes looked back.

"I love you so much," Justin said kissing Brian's chin.

"And I love you just as much."

Justin smiled. Brian did say those words more easily these days. "Not more?" he asked with a grin.

"Impossibly more," Brian said as Justin studied Brian's face. There was no smirk, just love, written all over it.

"I'm ready for dessert now," Justin said deciding not to press his luck. Strong emotion either made Brian maudlin or angry.

"I thought I was dessert," Brian said sitting up.

"You're good. But not very filling. I need calories."

"You've had about a million so far tonight."

"Then what's a million more?"

Brian snorted. He rang the bell knowing that it would take a few minutes for the dessert he had ordered to appear. They could get cleaned up in the meantime.

They sipped champagne on the couch waiting for Jorge to appear once again. A tap at the door and he wheeled in a trolley bearing a flaming Baked Alaska.

"Oh," Justin smiled. "Those look great."

"They are delicious, gentlemen," Jorge told them as he cleared the table and set the dessert and a carafe of coffee on the table.

"I don't think I've ever had Baked Alaska," Justin said as Jorge closed the door behind him.

"When I finally earned some decent money, this was one of the first extravagant desserts I ever ordered."

"And you've liked it ever since?"

"It's okay, but it's the fact that I can afford to order it that makes it so special."

"You are so weird," Justin said. He sat down and lifted a spoonful of the delicacy to Brian's lips. Brian accepted it and gave a little moan.

"Hot and cold together. Very special."

"Delicious," Justin declared.

They nibbled at the dessert, feeding each other a spoonful here and there. As Justin cleaned the plate, he let out a sigh.

"What's wrong?" Brian asked with a frown. He had tried to make the evening perfect for his partner.

"It's almost over," Justin said softly. "This was about the best night of my life."

"I hope it has a better ending than another night you thought was special," Brian said unable to stop his mind from turning to the ill-fated prom.

"It's been great," Justin said quickly not wanting them to go there. "I'm ready to go home and sleep with you in our bed in our home."

"Me too," Brian said with a gentle smile.

They said their goodbyes to Emile and left the building. They were both quiet on the ride home. As they entered the house, Justin looked around. He had just about everything he had ever wanted. He smiled as he watched Brian set the alarm.

"Ready for bed?" Justin asked.

"I should check the messages," Brian replied.

"Tomorrow," Justin said with a soft smile. "I want to go to bed right now."

"You do, do you?" Brian pulled Justin in for a sweet kiss. "I would have thought you'd have had enough."

"Somebody once told me that there's never enough."

"Somebody may live to regret those words."

"But not tonight."

"No, not tonight," Brian agreed as they walked arm in arm up the stairs.

Domestic Bliss

Work and Play and Death

Brian sipped his coffee at the kitchen table. He needed to get dressed and head out to the gym for his Saturday workout, but he didn't feel the least bit like doing that. Justin had given him quite the workout the previous night. He squirmed in his seat still feeling the dull burn of Justin's cock up his ass.

He thought back to Emile's and their activities between the courses of their meal. He really should go to the gym. He must have eaten at least triple the amount of calories he normally would have ingested, but he had wanted to make the evening special for Justin. And it had been special.

Brian stared off into space. Justin was still asleep upstairs. He could just head back up and curl himself around his boy. They could sleep as long as they wanted and then they could fuck. That would be a perfect day. But he really should go to the gym.

With a heavy sigh Brian stood up. He would be good. He was getting too old to ignore all those calories. He would hit the gym. He walked over to the phone on the wall prepared to call Michael and see if the boys would be there. The light flashing on the base told him he had messages. He had meant to check them last night before Justin had dragged him upstairs. Brian smiled at the memory and his dick responded accordingly.

After a momentary hesitation Brian pushed the message button. He expected to hear Michael's voice asking him if he'd be at the gym today, or Lindsay wondering if he was coming to see Gus. Instead a voice he hadn't heard for quite a while caught his attention.

"Brian," the voice said. "Brian, if you're there, please pick up." There was a long sigh. "Brian, it's Trip Bedford. I really need to talk to you. Call me as soon as you get this …

please!"

There was something in Trip's voice that didn't sound right. Brian frowned. Trip wouldn't have called if it hadn't been something important. His voice sounded almost desperate.

Brian walked to the family room and scrolled through the Rolodex of numbers that sat on the desk. He was pretty sure Trip's was in there. Finally he found it. He picked up the phone, dialed the number and waited for it to ring.

"Brian," Trip's voice came over the line.

"What's wrong?"

"It's dad. He had another heart attack last night."

"Shit! I'm sorry. How's he doing?"

"He died around 6 am this morning. There didn't seem to be much they could do. His heart was just too weak."

Brian grimaced. He liked Jerome Bedford. He even admired the man. He was very sorry to hear what had happened. "Is there anything I can do?"

"Not really," Trip admitted with some hesitation. "I've started on the funeral arrangements. I think it will be next Tuesday. That will give some relatives and business associates who are far away time to attend."

"That's good."

"You'll be here, won't you?" Trip asked.

Brian could hear the longing in Trip's voice. He must be so lonely all of a sudden. Trip and his father had always been close, had even lived together in different wings of the same house. "Of course, I will. And if there's anything else I can do, anything that you need…"

"There is," Trip said. "if you really mean it, I could use some moral support. Could you come out here maybe today or tomorrow?"

"I … I don't know," Brian hesitated. He knew Justin would not like this at all.

"Please, Brian. I need someone I can lean on."

"Okay, okay. I'll see what arrangements I can make, and I'll get back to you."

"Thank you. I really need someone. I really need you."

Brian blinked. He had stayed away from Trip all these months for a very good reason. When they were together their mutual attraction was very strong. So far Brian had resisted and Trip had done the same, not that he hadn't tried to seduce Brian a couple of times. Now he and Trip would be together if he went to Indianapolis, and without the leveling influence of the elder Bedford.

"I'll see what I can do," Brian repeated and cut the connection.

How the fuck was he going to explain this to Justin?

"Who was that?" Justin asked coming into the kitchen. He headed for the coffee pot pouring himself a mugful. "Brian?" he said when there was no response to his question.

Brian ran his hand through his hair. "It … it was some bad news."

"Bad news? What happened?"

"Jerome Bedford died this morning."

"Oh, I'm sorry. I know how much you liked and respected him."

"Yes, I did. He was one of the finest people I ever met."

"Are you going to the funeral?"

"Of course, but when I talked to Trip just now, he wants me to come tomorrow or even today if I can arrange it."

"I see," Justin said slowly. Brian was sure that Justin saw a lot more than Brian wanted him to see. "So when are you leaving?"

"I haven't made any arrangements yet."

"I guess I should have asked how soon you wanted to leave."

"Trip sounded … shaky. I think he needs someone to help him. He and his father were very close."

Justin studied his partner. He hated the thoughts of Brian rushing to Trip Bedford's side, even if the reason was one as horrible as this. Trip had wanted Brian from the first time they had met, but somehow Brian had resisted even though the attraction between the two was so evident. Without Trip's father being present Justin could only imagine what might happen, and his imagination did not allow for a good outcome.

"Then you should go," Justin said.

"I should?" Brian asked. "I thought you'd be totally opposed."

"I didn't say I like it, but I understand why you need to go."

Brian looked at his surprisingly mature partner. "You never cease to amaze me."

"Sometimes I amaze myself."

"You … you could come with me," Brian suggested. He wasn't really sure that he wanted to be alone with Trip Bedford.

"How can I come with you? I start my job on Monday. I can't very well ask for the first day off. Besides I never even met Jerome Bedford," Justin explained.

Brian sighed. "I really think I should get to Indianapolis as quickly as I can."

"I agree."

Brian's eyebrow shot up. "I … I'm glad you feel that way."

"Why don't you call Cynthia and arrange things at Vangard and I'll go online to find flights for today or tomorrow."

"Justin," Brian hesitated. "Thanks."

"You're my partner, Brian. I know you have to do this. I'll help any way that I can."

"I see that and I do appreciate it."

"There is one thing you can do for me though."

"What?" Brian asked with a frown.

"While you're in Indianapolis, just remember that I am your partner."

"I won't forget," Brian promised. He grabbed Justin's arm before the lad could move away to the computer.

Justin looked up into the hazel eyes. He knew Brian meant to be true to him. He just hoped that good intentions would be enough.

"I mean it," Brian emphasized. "I won't forget."

"You better not," Justin said and smiled. That broke the tense moment and Brian pulled Justin against him for a warm kiss. "I'll be here when you get back."

"You better be," Brian said with his own smile.

A few hours later Justin stood by the check-in area of Liberty Air. Brian was talking to the attendant and checking his bag. He was planning to stay for almost a week. Justin studied his partner. No matter how much he tried to deny it, he could feel the clench of fear deep in his gut.

He knew Brian needed to go to Indianapolis. He understood why, and on some level he was proud that Brian wanted to honor Jerome Bedford with his presence. He also knew that Brian wanted to help Trip, wanted to be there to support Trip as he laid his father and best friend to rest. That didn't make him any less afraid.

"All set," Brian said coming up beside Justin.

"Good," Justin replied doing his best to smile.

"I'll try to come back Wednesday after things settle from the funeral."

"Take as much time as you need, as much time as Trip needs."

"I'll … I'll miss you."

"Hold onto that thought."

"I will," Brian said pulling Justin in close for a hug.

"You probably should go through security. It looks like there's a long line."

"Yeah."

"Brian."

"Yeah."

"I love you."

"I know."

"Have … have a good trip," Justin said shakily.

"I am coming back, you know."

Justin nodded and with a final hug and chaste kiss Brian disappeared into the security area. Justin let out a long breath and blinked back an unwanted tear. He had forgotten to tell Brian to call him when he arrived. He wondered if Brian would remember him when he came face to face with Trip Bedford after all this time.

As the plane slowed for the descent into Indianapolis, Brian frowned and stared out the small window beside him. He would see Trip Bedford in a few minutes. The man had promised to pick him up at the airport even though Brian had said he could take a taxi to a hotel. He knew perfectly well that Trip was going to insist that Brian stay at the mansion. And he knew he would acquiesce. After all he had come there to comfort Trip and he could do that better at the mansion than from a hotel in town.

The jolt of the tires hitting the tarmac brought Brian out of his reverie. He wondered what he would say to Trip. After saying how sorry he was about Jerome's death, what could he possibly tell the man? "You look good, Trip. You haven't changed a bit. I still want you, Trip, but that can never happen. Get your hands off me, Trip. We can't do this. Justin is waiting for me at home. Fuck, Trip, you smell so good. And you feel even better." Brian shook his head. He had to get a grip before he actually met Trip in a few minutes.

Slowly he walked down the jet way letting people pass him as they hurried along. The doorway loomed ahead and then he remembered that people couldn't meet you at the gate anymore. He still had the long walk to security before he would see Trip. That was good. He'd be fine by then.

As Brian walked out of the secure area he risked a glance around. His eyes had barely come up before someone grabbed him and pulled him into a bear hug.

"Jesus, Brian! I'm so fucking glad to see you," Trip breathed against his ear.

Brian hugged back and then tried to extricate himself from Trip's grasp. Trip held on for just a bit too long, and he was sure they both felt the mutual stirring in their pants as Trip finally released him.

Trip grinned at him at the same time that he wiped a tear from his eyes. "Do you have luggage?"

Brian nodded. "I can stay for a few days."

Trip's smile grew broader. "The car's driving around the loop. James will meet us when we get outside."

Brian nodded again. "He can drive me to a hotel."

"You … you didn't make a reservation, did you? I told you I wanted you to stay with me."

"I think it would be better if I stayed in town," Brian said slowly.

"No, Brian, please. You have to come home with me. I can't stand to be in that big house by myself."

Brian groaned inwardly. He had known this was exactly what would happen, and he had come anyway. "Sure, Trip," he said giving in to the inevitable as he yanked his bag from the conveyor belt.

They made their way out to the sidewalk where they waited in silence for James and the car to appear. Very soon the car pulled up. James scurried out to open the door for them and to throw Brian's bag in the trunk. Brian settled in the spacious backseat of the limo and Trip slid in beside him. Brian felt their knees brush together and Trip smiled at him.

"Trip, nothing's changed," Brian stated hoping to put a stop to what was already becoming evident to both of them.

"Everything's changed," Trip replied.

"No, no, it hasn't. Justin's waiting for me."

"Fuck Justin!"

"Trip, how can you say that?"

"Because I'm all alone, and I need you. I know you want me too."

"Trip…" Brian began but he knew he couldn't deny anything that Trip had said.

Trip leaned towards Brian and Brian held up his hand. He had to be strong. Nothing was going to happen between them. Trip sighed and melted back into the soft seats of the limo. He stared at Brian through hooded eyes. The ride continued in silence.

When they pulled up in front of the mansion, Brian reluctantly got out of the car. Maybe this whole idea was wrong. Trip was in a very fragile state and he obviously expected more from Brian than Brian intended to give. The only problem was, Brian knew he couldn't just walk away and leave Trip alone.

Brian took his suitcase from James and headed up the stairs to Jerome's side of the house. He was going to take the room he had always occupied when he visited the Bedford's.

"Brian," Trip called. "There's an empty room next to mine. Take it."

"No, I think it would be better if I stay where I've always stayed."

"Suit yourself," Trip said heading down to his own room. It didn't matter where Brian was as long as he was in the mansion. Trip would find him. "Oh Brian," Trip called down the long hallway. "Dinner in an hour."

"Sure," Brian said as he closed and locked his door.

Brian hung up his suits and unpacked his other clothes. He was tempted to take a shower, but he knew what he really needed was to talk to Justin. He fished his cell phone out of his jacket and hit one on speed dial.

"Hey," Justin's voice came across the miles.

"Hey," Brian purred. He relaxed into the sound of his lover's voice.

"Are you at the mansion?"

"Yeah, how did you know?"

"I know Trip a little. He wants you close."

"Too close."

"Is everything all right?"

"Yeah, no, I don't know. Trip's lonely."

"He's already come onto you, hasn't he?"

"I guess you could call it that."

"I trust you," Justin whispered.

"I wish I trusted myself."

"Help him and come home soon."

"I will."

Brian cut the connection and decided he would have that shower after all. Maybe if he was late enough for dinner Trip would have eaten and gone to his room.

When Brian appeared almost an hour after the appointed time, Trip was sitting at the end of the large table drinking. He looked Brian up and down. Brian could tell the glass of wine in his hand was far from his first of the evening.

"Took your sweet time," Trip said belligerently.

"Is there something to eat or are we having a liquid dinner."

Trip smirked and picked up the small bell that sat beside his plate. The gentle tinkle of the bell produced a maid who dished out the soup. Brian settled in a seat on the side of the table. Trip sat at the head of the table where his father had always sat before. But no more.

The soup was good and so was the rest of the meal. Trip drank more than he ate and Brian knew that was not a good sign. Brian declined dessert but accepted coffee hoping Trip would have some too. Trip had another glass of wine, port this time.

"Join me in some coffee?" Brian asked.

"No … thanks. I'll stick with the wine."

"How did I know you'd say that?" Brian mumbled to himself.

"What? You know you're bumming me out, and I thought you had come to help me."

"Maybe if you'd stop drinking and let someone help you…"

"Yeah, sure. I ask for your 'help' in the limo and you turned me down flat."

"I told you on the phone that I would help you with the funeral. I didn't say anything about fucking you," Brian said with a frown.

"You know what I need from you … what I want," Trip choked out.

"Maybe I should see if I can get a flight back to Pittsburgh right now," Brian stated standing up.

"No, please," Trip begged. "I'm drunk. I should go to bed."

"Good thinking," Brian replied watching Trip struggle to stand up. He was pretty well plastered.

Trip stumbled towards the door leaning heavily on the table as he proceeded. When he ran out of table he swayed precariously and threatened to fall flat on his face. Brian was instantly at his side grabbing him around the waist and allowing Trip to lean against him.

"I'm sorry," Trip croaked tears forming in his eyes. "I'm so fucking miserable."

"I know," Brian agreed edging the man out of the dining room and towards the stairs. He wondered if he'd be able to get Trip all the way up there and to his apartment.

Trip held onto Brian's shoulder and did his best to walk up the stairs. At one point he lost his balance and came close to tipping them both over backwards. Brian had a fleeting image of Justin finding them in each other's arms at the bottom of the stairs - with their necks broken.

"Come on, Trip. Focus! We're almost there."

They stumbled down the corridor and Brian opened the door to Trip's apartment. He had only ever been in there once before and that had been enough. He remembered the smell of leather and the masculine feel of the rooms. He dragged Trip along with him towards the bedroom. He opened the door and looked at the king sized bed that confronted him.

He groaned inwardly and hauled Trip over to the edge of the bed. He was sorely tempted to drop the man and run. Instead he lowered Trip onto the side of the bed and allowed him to fall back against the pillows. He seemed totally out of it, and that was good as far as Brian was concerned. Brian knew he should undress the man and tuck him in, but he refused to do that. Instead he slipped Trip's shoes off his feet and lifted his legs onto the bed. He grabbed the edge of the duvet that covered the bed and flipped it over the man. With a sigh he walked to the door looking back at his sleeping charge.

"Maybe it was a good thing that you drank yourself into a stupor," Brian said softly as he closed the door. He walked out of the apartment closing the outer door and made his way to his bedroom. He stepped inside and locked the door behind him. He needed to talk to Justin.

"Hey," Brian said when Justin answered.

"I didn't expect another call tonight. Is everything all right?"

"Trip's drunk. He's sleeping it off in his room."

"As long as he isn't sleeping it off in your room."

"Funny, I was thinking much the same thing."

"He sounds like he's a mess."

"He's very unstable. I wish … you were here."

"I wish I was too," Justin admitted. "But you're being a good friend. It's only a few days."

"And a funeral."

"No four weddings to go with it."

"Nothing to go with it except Trip's misery and loneliness."

"Brian, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Brian said quickly. Then he rethought that statement. "Actually I'm fucking scared. I don't know if I can handle Trip … in the state that he's in."

"You could come home," Justin said hopefully.

"I honestly don't think I can leave him the way he is. If anything happened to him … I … I don't know how I could live with it."

"You don't think he'd do something rash, do you?"

"I honestly don't know."

"Jesus, Brian, now you're scaring me."

"I … I didn't mean to. I just needed a sane voice to talk to."

"How about a little phone sex to calm your nerves?"

"I like the sound of that," Brian said with a small grin. Justin always knew what he needed, often before he knew it himself.

"Are you naked?"

"No, you little twat, I just got to my room."

"Hey, be nice to me or I'll hang up."

"Don't you dare."

"I won't. You know that. So are you naked yet?"

"No, but I'm working on it," Brian said unzipping his jeans. "Are you?"

"Getting there," Justin giggled.

Brian felt his dick swell at that sweet sound. God, he loved that kid. "Your giggle just made me hard."

"I knew you were easy."

"Me!"

"Yes, you. I can always make you hard."

"That's true," Brian admitted leaning back against the pillows and running his hand up and down his dick. "Nobody does it like you."

Justin smiled. "Comfy?"

"Umm."

"I'm naked. I'm stroking myself and thinking about you, thinking about you lying on top of me and nibbling my ear. I can feel your tongue licking my collarbone and it sends shivers of pleasure all over me."

Brian saw the direction this was taking. Something new from his ever inventive partner. "My dick is hard and I can feel it reaching out towards you. It knows where it belongs. It's pressed against your belly while I kiss you so long and so hard that neither of us can breathe."

Justin moaned into the phone. "I can feel it. The tip is leaking and I put my finger through the slit and then into my mouth. You taste so fucking good."

"No better than you taste to me. I can feel you mouth around my cock sucking and pulling. Your mouth is so soft and warm and … that tongue of yours does the most remarkable things."

Justin giggled as he stroked his throbbing dick, pulling harder and more insistently. He loved hearing Brian describe what it felt like when Justin sucked him off. "I feel the head of your dick pressing into me and it's the most wonderful combination of pain and joy. It hurts a bit but it feels so damn good when you're inside me. I feel like I'm full, like I'm complete, like nothing can ever come between us."

"And I love being inside you. It's warm and tight and safe. I never felt what I feel with you with any other man."

"I love you," Justin whispered as his strokes became faster.

"I love you back," Brian groaned. "I'm close."

"Me too. You're pounding my ass and jerking me off and I'm so fucking turned on."

"You're tightening that sweet hole of yours and my dick feels like it's going to be cut off and there is no place else I ever want to be. And … and … and I'm coming!"

"Oh, fuck, Brian, I'm coming too."

For a minute or two all that could be heard over the phones was heavy breathing and little gasps.

"That was fucking awesome!" Brian said after a bit.

"Awesome!"

"You sure as fuck know how to talk dirty."

"Is that what I was doing?" Justin giggled. "I was merely describing the techniques of my most excellent lover."

Brian snorted. "Do you take lessons in knowing the right thing to say to an asshole like me?"

"No, I don't need to. I have years of practical experience in dealing with assholes."

"I am so fucked."

"And you love every minute of it," Justin chuckled.

"Yeah, I do."

"Feeling better now?"

"Some."

"I could stay on the phone with you all night."

"You'd do that?"

"If you want me to."

"I think I can probably sleep now," Brian said wiping the cum off his chest.

"I wish I was there."

"I wish you were too."

"You can call me any time you need me. You know that, don't you?"

"I know."

"So don't forget to call. I'll leave my phone on all the time."

"What are you going to do tomorrow?"

"It's Sunday so I thought I'd start with church followed by lunch with Debbie and dinner with my mother."

Brian snorted. "You are so full of shit."

Justin grinned. "Made you laugh. I'm going to sleep late so that I'll look youthful and well rested for my first day of work on Monday."

"Sounds like a plan, but I wouldn't try to look too young. They might put you in daycare."

"Briiaan!"

"Sorry, Sunshine, you asked for that one."

"I really loved our evening at Emile's. Thanks again for doing all that for me."

"I was really looking forward to you showing me your appreciation for that for days to come. And here I am a thousand miles away."

"I'll save up the appreciation till you get back."

"You do that."

"Have I told you that I love you?"

"Once or twice."

"Well, I do. I want you to come home as soon as you can."

"That's what I want too."

There was a long pause as each thought about being separated from the other.

"I guess I should let you go, so you can get that beauty sleep," Brian said finally.

"I suppose," Justin sighed.

"Good night, Sunshine."

"Good night, old man."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

There was a long silence while neither of them wanted to cut the connection. Finally Brian hit end and the line went dead. It would be a long time before either of them got to sleep.

Domestic Bliss

Work and Play and Drinking

Somehow Brian got through Sunday. Trip woke with an almighty hangover. He was rather contrite about his blatant play for Brian. Brian hoped that boded well for the rest of the visit and Trip would back off.

They spent a good portion of the day at the funeral home choosing a casket and all the trappings. Brian was always amazed at how much a funeral cost and how time consuming all the decisions were. He thought back to the death of a man who worked for him. His name was Jack just like his father's and he was dead just like his Jack and like Jerome Bedford.

Brian wondered how Jack's wife was doing and little Emily who was the same age as Gus. He wondered if she was growing up without a father. Maybe she had a stepfather, someone nice that her mother had found. Maybe she had moved on. It was the way of the world to move on.

Brian and Trip had then moved on to the florist who opened especially for them on a Sunday. The proprietor knew that Trip would be laying down an ungodly sum so it was well worth their while to open. Brian helped Trip choose some ostentatious bouquets knowing that Jerome Bedford would have preferred something much more simple and frugal. But this was Trip's tribute to his father. Brian didn't want to interfere. He bit his tongue and just made sure that Trip didn't choose anything too ugly or too huge.

By the time they had accomplished all that, Trip said they should find a restaurant and have a nice early dinner. Brian agreed and they found a pleasant place to dine. Trip started in on the wine.

"Trip, tomorrow you have to be at the funeral home all afternoon and evening. Don't get sloshed. You need your wits about you," Brian cautioned.

"I'll just have a couple of glasses," Trip conceded.

"You want to make your father proud, don't you? So two glass limit."

"That's what I fucking said," Trip scowled.

They ate in silence. Brian was glad to see food disappearing into the man and only three glasses of wine to go with it.

When dinner was over, Trip suggested they go to a club. Brian did his best not to be too blunt in his response.

"Trip, for Christ's sake, your father just died. Leave the clubs until the fucking funeral is over."

Trip looked properly chastised. "I can't face a whole evening with nothing to do," Trip said staring at the sidewalk.

"Let's rent a fucking movie. That ought to take up an hour or two."

"I guess Justin really has domesticated you."

Brian made a face but didn't say anything. They climbed into the limo and headed for the nearest Blockbuster store.

They spent the rest of the evening watching Spiderman I and II. Brian hoped he never had to watch it again no matter how cute Toby Maguire might be. Trip drank again but not as much as the night before. Finally Brian convinced him to go to bed and Brian retired to his own room. The first thing he did after locking his door was to call Justin.

"Hey."

"Hey, you sound in a better mood tonight," Justin observed.

"Trip's gone to bed and we didn't have any major confrontations this time."

"That's good. How drunk is he?"

"Not as bad as last night."

"So what did you do today?" Justin asked.

"Caskets, flowers, music. Fuck, I hate funerals."

"Sounds depressing."

"It fucking is."

"Only a few more days."

"So they tell me. What did you do today?"

"I actually did have lunch with Mom. She wanted to wish me well for tomorrow, tell me how proud I make her."

There was a long pause. Brian knew that Justin was thinking about his father. He would be wishing his father would call and tell him how proud he was and how he knew Justin would be a big success in his job.

"You're going to do great tomorrow," Brian said hoping that might help.'

"Thanks."

"Don't laugh but I spent the evening watching Spiderman I and II," Brian admitted.

"You didn't!"

"I did so. The sacrifices I make for some people."

"I can't believe you did that. You've seen those what … four times now?"

"Four times too many as far as I'm concerned."

"You secretly love them."

"Do not. I just happen to attract people who are crazy about comics."

"Yeah, you do. Me, Mikey, Trip. Who knew?"

"And I suffer in silence."

"Yeah right."

"I miss you."

"I miss you too. Want to … um … you know?"

"Of course, why do you think I called?"

"Asshole!"

Brian chuckled. They had an intense bout of phone sex with Justin using his best techniques to get Brian off and make him forget about Trip Bedford, at least for a while.

When breath returned to normal and clean up had been done, Justin asked, "So what do you have to do tomorrow?"

"Hours on end at the funeral home."

"You have to go?"

"No, but Trip really wants me there with him. I think he needs someone to lean on."

"You're a good friend."

"I hope so."

"Night, Brian."

"Night … Sunshine."

Brian went to take a shower. When he returned to the bedroom he lay naked on the bed thinking about Trip and Justin and the funeral. He hated funerals. He wished he was home in the loft, wished Justin was in bed with him, wished his dick was up his lover's ass. He groaned loudly.

"Brian!"

Brian jumped and sat up abruptly. There was a sharp rap at the door and someone jiggling the door handle. Brian knew immediately who it was.

"Brian. Let me in."

"Trip, you've been drinking again, haven't you? Go back to bed."

"Let me in … please! I'm so lonely. I need you."

Brian sighed and shook his head. "Go back to bed. I'm not letting you in."

"Please, just let me sleep with you. I won't do anything else."

"No, Trip. Not gonna happen."

"Please, Brian, please."

"No."

"I'm not going away. I'll sleep here on the floor."

There was a loud thud as Trip hit the floor. Brian knew he would never get any sleep knowing Trip was lying on the floor outside his door. He got up and threw on some sweat pants. He opened the door slowly only to have Trip fall over backwards into the room.

"Jesus, Trip. C'mon, get up. Here I'll help you."

Brian struggled to get Trip back on his feet. He tried to help the man out the door to take him back to his suite. Trip resisted and tried to stagger towards Brian's bed. Finally Brian gave up and let the drunken man fall onto his bed. He was sure there was another bedroom nearby where he could sleep.

He began gathering up a few things when he heard a strange sound. He stopped and listened. He looked over at Trip who had his face buried in the pillow. He was sobbing as Brian could tell from his heaving shoulders.

"Trip…"

There was no response just more muffled sobs.

"Trip, you have to get hold of yourself. Please."

"I … I'm sorry," Trip said from the depths of the pillow. "I don't know how to do that."

"You have to try."

"I will. I'll try."

"Good."

"Please don't leave me alone," Trip begged.

Brian turned to stare at the back of the man who still had his face buried in a pillow. He was such a fucking mess. Brian ran his hand through his hair. He went over and closed the door to his room. There was no need to lock it this time. The man he was trying to keep out was already inside. Brian walked slowly to the bed. He sat on the edge next to Trip and gently squeezed the man's shoulder.

Trip rolled onto his side to look at Brian. Tears stained his face and he looked so pathetic. But through all that he managed a little smile at Brian's tenderness.

"Stay with me," Trip pleaded.

"I'm here. I'll stay. Go to sleep," Brian said softly.

"Hold me."

Brian sighed and took the man into his arms. He slowly rocked Trip like he would do with a scared or hurt Gus. Slowly Trip's eyes closed. After a bit his steady breathing told Brian that he was asleep. Gently Brian released him and walked around the bed. He crawled in beside Trip and felt the man lean against him. Eventually Brian slept too.

The next morning Brian woke early. He looked over at Trip who slept on peacefully. Brian didn't want to wake Trip until he was fully clothed. Besides he knew Trip could use the extra rest before he had to face the day at the funeral home.

Brian dressed quietly and decided to go for a run around the estate. When he returned about an hour later Trip began to stir as Brian grabbed some clothes to take to the shower with him. Brian quickly entered the bathroom and locked the door behind him. He hoped Trip would be gone back to his own room by the time he came out.

Luckily Trip got the message and was not there when Brian reappeared. Brian dressed and went downstairs for something to eat. He found Trip in the dining room eating and thankfully not drinking.

"Morning," Brian said.

"Morning," Trip replied. "Thank you for letting me stay last night."

"I knew you needed company."

"I did. I didn't know how I was going to cope with today. I needed to know you were there for me."

"That's fine," Brian said trying to distance himself from what had happened. "Are you ready to hit the funeral home?"

"I guess I have to."

"Yes, you do."

"Then I'm ready. We should leave here about one. You are coming with me, aren't you?"

"I said I would."

Brian could see Trip visibly relax. He supposed this was for the best. Nothing had happened last night except for Trip's meltdown. Maybe he had finally realized that nothing was ever going to happen.

When they arrived at the funeral home, the manager met them and ushered them into a room. There was an open casket which Brian detested. They had to stand near the body and talk to all the mourners who presented themselves. Brian knew the thing in the casket wasn't Jerome Bedford. His essence was somewhere else.

Somehow they got through the day. They went out for a bite before returning to go through the same process with all the people who arrived at the funeral home in the evening.

By the time they got back to the mansion it was almost midnight and they were both exhausted. They said goodnight at the top of the stairs and each headed off to their room. Brian didn't think Trip would have the energy or the inclination to bother him after the trying day they had both been through.

Brian's call to Justin was short and to the point. A brief check about how each other's day had gone, a bit of phone sex and a reluctant goodbye. Brian sank into his bed and was asleep immediately.

----------

Brian could feel Justin's hot breath on his groin. He shivered at the feel and also at the fact that the covers had been pulled back from his upper body. He felt Justin's warm mouth engulf his cock and he arched his back. A moan escaped his lips. He licked his lips as the warm mouth moved up and down his shaft. He thrust involuntarily and Justin's mouth took his length. A few more thrusts and he came with a loud groan.

"Justin," Brian whispered reaching for the soft blond hair that hovered over his groin.

The hair felt strange and he opened his eyes. Trip Bedford looked up at him as he licked his lips having just swallowed Brian's load.

"Morning," Trip said with a smile.

"What the fuck…?"

"That was your wake up call. It's late."

"Trip…"

"Got to go. I'll arrange some brunch and then we'll be off to the funeral."

"Trip…" Brian began but the room was suddenly empty. "Shit!"

Brian flopped back against the pillows. How the fuck could this have happened? He had been sure that it was Justin sucking him off. How did Trip get in? Then Brian remembered that they had both been so tired after greeting people at the funeral home that he had been sure they would both sleep through the night. And they had. But he hadn't locked the door and Trip had taken advantage of that. How was he going to explain this to Justin?

An uncomfortable silence followed them around for the rest of the day. Brian didn't know what to say to Trip and Trip seemed more than satisfied with what he had done that morning.

When they arrived at the church for the funeral, Brian wanted to sit at the back by himself. Trip made it clear that he would not allow that especially since Brian was going to say a few words about Jerome. As a result they sat side by side in the front row of the church.

There was a minister and a couple of other speakers before Brian was called. They were kind of a blur. Brian climbed to the pulpit and had a fleeting thought about his mother seeing him up there like the preacher from Hell. He cleared his throat and drove away such thoughts.

"Jerome Bedford was an amazing man," Brian began. "He was one of my clients in my advertising firm, but he was much more than that. He was a gracious host, a kind and understanding confidant, a loving father and a gentle friend. If you were defining what makes a gentleman, all you needed to do was describe Jerome Bedford." Brian looked down at Trip who smiled up at him. "It is my hope that Jerome's son Trip will carry on that fine family history of honesty, integrity and caring."

Brian glanced at Trip before returning to his seat. He hoped his message had come across loud and clear to the father and the son. Soon the speeches were done and the procession to the cemetery was completed. The clods of dirt that each person dropped on the coffin reverberated somewhere deep inside Brian. He hated the thought of never seeing Jerome again. And then there was Trip.

There was food and drink back at the mansion following the laying to rest at the cemetery. Brian wondered if the day would ever be over. Trip seemed to be handling it well. It was like his visit to Brian's room that morning had given him some kind of renewed courage or energy. Brian didn't like that one little bit.

When they ushered the last guest out the door, Trip turned to Brian and said, "I need a real drink. Care to join me?"

Brian followed Trip into the library where a bottle of Beam was waiting for them on the bar cart. Brian had to admit that a slug of Beam would really hit the spot. Brian downed his in one gulp and held out the glass for a refill. Trip poured Brian another and one for himself.

"What the fuck did you think you were doing in my room this morning?" Brian demanded deciding he had held this in far too long.

"Having my way with you," Trip smirked.

"Trip, for God sake, what were you trying to do?"

"Do you really want an answer to that question?"

"Yes, I do."

"I came to wake you up, and I was totally surprised to find your door unlocked. I know you think you can lock me out but it's not that easy.

"Apparently."

Trip ignored the jibe. "So when I knocked and you didn't answer I tried the door, and lo and behold, it opened."

"And you just had to come in."

Trip nodded. "I wanted to look at you. You're beautiful naked. Hell, you're beautiful any way at all."

"So you pulled the covers off and had a good look."

Trip nodded again. "You know I want you. And you had some morning wood. It looked so tempting I just couldn't resist."

"I bet!"

"I'm serious. You are quite irresistible. You seemed to think I was Justin, which was fine with me."

"I did think you were Justin, otherwise I wouldn't have…" Brian let that trail off.

"Oh yes you would. I must be at least as good as Justin if you couldn't tell the difference."

"I was thinking of Justin, not you."

"The outcome was the same," Trip smirked.

"I think it's time for me to go home," Brian said turning on his heel with every intention of getting out of there immediately.

"Wait," Trip said loudly. "Don't go yet. I … I really appreciate everything you've done. Don't leave like this."

"Why not? I think we're through. I'm scheduled to go tomorrow anyway."

"Stay tonight. Let me take you out somewhere … one last time."

Brian knew he should just leave, but he didn't want his friendship with Trip to end like this. "All right, I'll stay until tomorrow morning, but no more … you know."

"Okay," Trip agreed. "Let's go to that club I took you to last time you visited. You liked it, didn't you?"

"Yeah."

"It'll help me forget … everything."

"Okay, but I'm going to lie down for a while. This fucking funeral stuff sucks all the life out of me. Oh, and the door will be locked."

"Thanks," Trip said in a very small voice.

Brian headed upstairs. It was afternoon in Pittsburgh so Justin wouldn't be home from work yet. He really hadn't asked him much about his job yesterday. He had been so tired after talking to all those people at the funeral home. He would be sure to ask Justin tonight.

Brian pulled off his funeral clothes and crawled under the sheets. He needed to relax and forget about funerals … and Trip Bedford.

When Brian awoke it was dark. He realized he had slept much longer than he thought he would. He felt an overwhelming need to talk to Justin. He picked up his phone and hit speed dial. It went to voicemail.

"Shit!" Brian griped as he waited for the message to end. "Justin, it's me. I … I miss you. Trip wants to go out to a club now that the whole funeral thing is over with. Don't know what time we'll get back. I'll try to call you. I'm coming home tomorrow."

Brian shut off his phone and went to take a shower. Some time later he met Trip in the library. Obviously the man had been drinking … again.

"Are you ready to go?" Brian asked.

"Shuure," Trip slurred.

"Have you been drinking the whole time I was upstairs?"

"Not quite."

"Let's go," Brian said frowning with distaste.

They made their way out to the limo and very quickly James had them at the club.

"Pick us up around one," Brian said as Trip made no mention of how they would get back. James nodded and got back into the car.

Trip and Brian entered the club. Trip seemed to have sobered up a bit on the ride from the mansion. He wanted to dance. Brian agreed hoping to keep Trip away from the bar at least for a while.

They actually had a good time at the club. Brian had forgotten what a good dancer Trip was. When he wasn't drunk Trip was an interesting, intelligent companion. They were a very striking couple when they were together.

By the time James picked them up they had had a couple of bumps and several drinks, but they had also had a very good time. Laughing and falling all over each other they got into the limo. Trip pulled a bottle of Beam from the liquor compartment and they tossed back shots on the drive home.

Trip took the remainder of the bottle with him as he and Brian climbed the stairs to their rooms. "Come and have one last drink in my apartment," Trip invited Brian.

Against his better judgment Brian agreed knowing that in the morning he would go back to Pittsburgh and Justin. He found a comfy leather armchair in Trip's apartment and accepted the large glass of Beam that Trip poured for him.

"Here's to my father," Trip said saluting with his glass of liquor.

"To Jerome," Brian said downing a good portion of his drink.

"And here's to you, Brian. I don't know how I could have possibly gotten through this without you."

"You're welcome. I was happy to help."

"The only problem now is where do I go from here."

"You have your whole life in front of you," Brian said. "You have money and the chance to do anything you want."

"The only thing I want to do is you," Trip said with a lopsided grin.

"Don't start," Brian cautioned.

"I know you don't like to hear that, but it's the truth. What good is money if I'm alone and so fucking unhappy."

"Could we just have a friendly drink and then I'll go to my room?" Brian asked not wanting to get into this whole mess once again.

"Sure, I'll shut up."

"I don't want you to shut up. I want us to be friends but that's all I want us to be."

"So what will you be doing when you get back to Pittsburgh?" Trip asked taking a different ploy.

"Don't know exactly. I'm sure there will be accounts to win, execs to dazzle…"

"And nobody dazzles like you."

"Thanks," Brian said.

Trip smiled. "You are extremely good at what you do."

"I'm good at a lot of things. In fact I'm fucking brilliant."

Trip laughed. "That's what I like about you. You're so modest."

"No shit!" Brian grinned. "I could use another drink," he added holding out his glass.

Trip poured and then sat back down. "I was thinking that maybe I should consider doing some charity work … in my father's name."

"He would like that."

"Yeah, he would. Any suggestions?"

"I did some stuff for the local gay and lesbian center. Some of the proceeds went to the AIDS hospice. What about something like that?"

"That sounds good," Trip said brightening up. "What did you do?"

"I ran a carnival to raise money for them."

"A carnival? That sounds like fun."

"It was … different."

"Tell me about it."

"I invented some games. My favorite was Butthole Bingo. This guy shot the balls out his ass. It was the funniest damn thing."

"I bet. Does he travel?"

"I'm sure he could be persuaded. He's very talented."

They both laughed and Trip moved over to sit on the arm of Brian's chair.

"I would love to see that guy perform," Trip chuckled.

"It's a sight to behold."

"What other stuff did you have?"

"We had Ring Toss."

"And how did that work?"

"Oh, you know, an erect penis and a plastic ring. Toss it onto said penis and win a prize."

"No!"

"Oh yes!"

"That's genius. What was the prize?"

"Guess."

"A good fuck with that erect penis."

"Only if you are a bottom," Brian chuckled.

"I am."

"I know."

"And you're a consummate top."

"Of course."

"Could we have a demonstration?" Trip asked the lust clear in his voice.

"Trip," Brian said but it came out more as a moan than an admonition.

"Yes."

"We can't."

"Just once, Brian. That's all I want."

Brian blinked and somehow Trip knew he had won. He leaned down and his lips found Brian's and the kiss held all the longing that they had felt for each other since they first met.

The kiss deepened and Brian felt his cock respond. Some part of him knew that he shouldn't be doing this but he wanted to. He had always wanted Trip almost as much as Trip had wanted him. Trip needed him and it would only be this once.

All thought escaped Brian's head as he felt Trip's hand squeeze his dick through his pants. He groaned and rammed his tongue down Trip's throat. Trip began pulling at his clothes and the next thing Brian knew they were naked on Trip's bed and he had a condom on his dick and it ached to be inside this handsome man.

"Fuck me," Trip begged, and Brian did. He fucked this man for all he was worth. There was nothing pretty or romantic about it. It was a hard fuck full of need and desire. They bucked against each other and Trip called Brian's name again and again. He had finally got what he wanted and Trip would not be disappointed. Brian knew he never disappointed.

When it was over and Brian pulled out, he felt Trip curl up against him and the man was asleep in a matter of moments. Brian looked at his handsome recent fuck and felt his stomach flip over.

"Justin," he whispered. What the hell was he going to tell Justin?

He quickly slid off the bed and recovered his clothes. The trip down the hall to his room seemed to take forever. As he opened the door he felt a shudder course through his body. He locked the door and headed for the shower. Maybe the hot water could wash away what he had just done.

Domestic Bliss

Work and Play and Repentance

Brian looked out the window of the jet as it taxied towards the terminal. Justin would probably be waiting for him. He wondered if he would be able to face his partner, be able to look him in the eye. He shuddered. His whole life could be over in a matter of minutes.

He thought back to his stupid night with Trip. Somehow he had known where it was going to lead. If he was really honest with himself, he had known. And he had let it happen. That made it all the worse. It made it that much harder to explain to Justin.

"Justin," he whispered barely audible. It was almost like a prayer although Brian would never have thought about it like that.

With a jolt the plane came to a stop and the seatbelt sign went off. Brian stood and stretched. Being in first class meant he would be one of the first off the plane. It would also mean that it would be that much sooner that he had to face those trusting blue eyes.

"Sir, you can exit now," the flight attendant said causing Brian to return to the real world.

He grabbed his computer bag and headed out the door. He walked the length of the jetway taking his time and allowing people to pass. When he came to the doorway, he half expected Justin to be standing there waiting for him. Then he remembered that only passengers could get beyond the security check point. He had the long walk to that area before he had to face Justin.

About halfway down the concourse Brian stopped and looked around. There was an empty gate nearby. He walked over and sat wearily down in one of the seats. He had to figure out what to say. He knew he was going to tell Justin. There had never been any question of that. But how did he tell him? He certainly didn't want to do it here in the bloody airport. He wondered if he could pretend everything was fine until they got home. Maybe in the privacy of their home he could figure out what to say and how to say it. There had to be some way that he could explain that would not cost him the most important person in his life.

It took all the strength he had, for Brian to stand and begin the remainder of the walk down the concourse. He felt like he had the weight of the world on his shoulders and it was fucking heavy.

He passed out of the secure area and looked around. He didn't see Justin anywhere and he almost breathed a sigh of relief when he felt a gentle tap on the shoulder. He turned and looked at the sunshine smile that he loved so much. He felt his heart wrench in his chest. It felt like a fucking heart attack. He must have grimaced because the smile faded and a worried look clouded the blue eyes.

"Did I scare you?" Justin asked. "Are you all right?"

"Just took me by surprise," Brian said. "I didn't think you were here."

"I'll always be here … for you," Justin smiled relieved at Brian's explanation.

Brian silently willed those words to be true especially after Justin learned what he had done. "Let's go get my luggage," Brian said. He walked slightly ahead of Justin as they headed to the luggage carousel.

Justin watched Brian. He knew something was wrong. He just hoped it wasn't what he thought it might be. But Brian hadn't touched him, not even on his arm or a touch of the hand. That didn't bode well.

Brian's luggage appeared quickly and they walked towards the car. Justin lifted the suitcase into the back of the Jeep and climbed into the driver's seat. Brian opened the passenger door and then seemed to hesitate.

"Did you want to drive?" Justin asked. "I don't mind."

"No, no, you drive."

Justin pulled out of the parking garage and paid the toll. Once he was on the highway he glanced at Brian who stared straight ahead seemingly looking at scenery he had never seen before.

"Is something wrong?" Justin asked.

"No, why?"

"You seem very quiet. You haven't even said you missed me."

Justin saw Brian blink hard and take in a deep breath. He had a very bad feeling deep in his gut.

"I … I did miss you … a lot," Brian said slowly.

"That's good, but you might show a little more enthusiasm."

"I'm sorry," Brian said. And he did truly look sorry, almost forlorn. "What did you do while I was gone?" Brian asked deciding he better say something before Justin got into inquisition mode.

"Besides having phone sex with you, you mean?"

"Yeah, besides that."

"I went to work every day."

"Right," Brian replied. He had totally forgotten about Justin's new job. "How was it … work I mean?"

"Great! I love it there."

"So how did you get off at two in the afternoon to pick me up?"

"I've been going in early and working late all week. They have flexible hours as long as you get your work done."

"That's … convenient."

"Yeah, it is. You might try something like that at Vangard. I bet the people who work there would really appreciate the flexibility."

"Yeah."

Justin half expected Brian to make some sexual innuendo out of the flexibility remark. When all he got was a "yeah", he knew that something was definitely going on, and he was afraid he knew what it was.

Finally they pulled into the driveway and Brian looked at the house he had come to love. He didn't move.

"Are you coming in? We're home."

"Home," Brian said. "Um … do you have to go back to work?"

"Nope. Got the rest of the day to spend with you," Justin beamed pulling Brian's suitcase from the back of the Jeep.

"I'll take that," Brian said. He didn't want Justin fucking waiting on him.

"So what do you want to do?" Justin asked suggestively.

"Actually I'm kind of hungry. I couldn't abide that crap they were serving on the flight."

"Do you want to order in?" Justin asked with a frown. He had expected Brian to be all over him, especially since he hadn't even kissed him at the airport.

"You know what I'd like? Some of your famous pasta."

"Famous pasta? When did my pasta become famous?"

"Since I've been thinking about it all the way home."

"Oh, um, sure, I can make you some."

"I'll go and unpack while you do that."

Justin watched Brian pick up his suitcase and walk towards the stairs. Now he knew that his worst fears were true. This wasn't like Brian at all. He was avoiding the issue, avoiding touching, avoiding sex. That could only mean one thing.

As he waited for the pasta to boil Justin thought over his options. He was pretty sure he knew what had happened in Indianapolis. Now he had to decide what he was going to do about it. One thing he was not going to do was confront Brian. Brian had to bring this up himself. But he wasn't going to let him run away from it either. It would be a fine balancing act for him to pull this off.

The other part of the equation was what was he going to do once Brian told him. Somewhere deep inside he hoped it wasn't true, but he knew realistically that it was. What was he going to say when Brian told him? He wished he knew.

Justin looked in the pot and realized he'd left the pasta there for too long. Brian liked it al dente. Well, fuck al dente. Brian would get what he made and he better fucking like it. Justin quickly drained the pasta and tossed it with the vegetables that he had stir fried. He added a small amount of sauce, just the way Brian liked it. Fuck Brian!

"It's ready!" he yelled up the stairs hoping it didn't sound too strident.

"Smells good," Brian said coming into the kitchen in his black jeans and T-shirt. He looked good enough to eat, but all Justin wanted to do was punch him in the gut.

Justin slopped some pasta on a plate and thrust it at Brian. Brian gave him a funny look but didn't say anything. He carried it to the small table in the kitchen and sat down. Justin stood by the stove staring at his partner.

"Aren't you having some?" Brian asked.

Justin knew Brian wasn't ready to spill his guts yet. He could wait. He scooped up some pasta for himself and sat down across from Brian. They both pushed the pasta around on their plates and nibbled at a piece of penne every now and then.

"For someone who wanted my pasta so bad you don't seem to be enjoying it," Justin said after a bit.

"It's good," Brian replied. He didn't know what else to say. Except that he did know what he should say, but he simply didn't know how to say it. "I'm really tired," Brian said standing and carrying his plate to the sink. He dumped the pasta in the trash and put his plate in the dishwasher. "I'm going to lie down for a bit."

"Sure," Justin said refusing to look at his partner.

Brian shrugged and headed back upstairs. He needed some time alone so that he could figure out how to handle what inevitably was to come.

Justin watched him go and knew that Brian was still not ready to talk. He'd give him a couple of hours and then they would confront it. In the meantime he could figure out his own position.

Brian tossed and turned in his sleep. A guilty conscience did not make for peaceful sleep. Suddenly he felt lips brush his cheek and then his neck. He felt a hand rub his chest and he leaned into it.

"Justin," he breathed.

"I'm here."

"I'm sorry."

"I know."

"Can you ever forgive me?"

"I'm thinking about it."

"Does that mean you will?"

"Brian."

"Yes."

"Wake up, Brian."

"Um … what?" Brian asked rubbing his eyes. Justin was lying beside him on the bed. "How long was I asleep?"

"Almost four hours."

"Shit!"

"I think you need to tell me what's going on," Justin said deciding to take the bull by the horns so to speak.

"What do you mean?" Brian asked with a frown and wide eyes.

"Don't."

"Don't what?"

Justin let out an exasperated breath. "Don't play coy."

"I may be a lot of things, but coy isn't one of them." Brian could feel his temper rising. He didn't like being cornered and Justin fucking knew that.

"Yeah, you're a lot of things all right," Justin said sarcastically.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Whatever you want it to mean."

"Now who's playing coy?"

"Fuck me, Brian."

"Where the fuck did that come from?"

"You always want to fuck me, don't you? And I always want to be fucked."

Brian snorted derisively.

"Come one, Brian," Justin goaded him. He threw his body across Brian's and began rutting against him. He could feel Brian's cock grow hard. "See, I knew you wanted me." Justin's hand reached for Brian's hard-on.

"I always want you," Brian groaned, "but not now."

"Why not? Why not, Brian? Come on, tell me."

"Justin."

"That's my name. Talk to me."

"Not now," Brian said as forcefully as he could without actually shouting.

"Then fuck me."

"Stop."

"I'm not going anywhere until you talk to me."

"And when I'm finished talking to you, then you will." The statement was made matter of factly and it hung in the air for a minute, like a lead weight suspended over their heads.

"Don't make assumptions."

Brian grimaced and shook his head. He knew what was going to happen. And he dreaded it.

"Brian, please," Justin said softly.

"You'll be sorry. I'll be sorry."

"This from the man who doesn't believe in sorry."

"I am sorry."

"About what?"

"I think you know."

"You're not getting off that easy. Say it."

"I don't know if I can."

"You can."

"All right. All right. I fucked Trip."

"I knew it," Justin said staring at Brian and feeling the anger build in his chest. "I fucking knew it."

"I'm sorry."

"I heard you before. Is that supposed to make it all right?"

"I didn't mean to," Brian said pathetically.

Justin snorted. "You are an asshole."

"I know," Brian said forlornly.

"Why?"

"Why what?" Brian asked with a frown.

"Why the fuck did you do it?"

"I wish to Christ I knew."

"Oh, you know, and I want to hear you say it."

"What do you mean?"

"I want to hear your version of why you did it."

"My version?"

"That's right. Your version. I want to know why you think this happened."

Brian stared at his partner like he had two heads. "Fuck, Justin, do we have to do this?"

"Yes," Justin said leaving no room for negotiation.

Brian let out a long sigh knowing he wasn't going to get out of this easily, at least not if he wanted to keep Justin around. "You know we've always been attracted to each other."

"I know that every man, woman and child is attracted to you, and I know that you have a dick with a mind of its own. But I also know that you have a brain and a will of your own. Why didn't you use those?"

"Because I'm pathetic."

"That's a given."

Brian raised his eyebrows but got no hint of sympathy from Justin. "Because he wanted me so much and he was so sad."

"A mercy fuck?"

"No, no, I didn't mean it like that."

"I thought not."

"Although there was an element of that to it."

"I bet."

"Because I had had too much to drink," Brian added.

"We're getting closer," Justin said with a nod of his head.

"And I wanted him."

"And the truth wins out."

"You've known I wanted him for a long time."

"And you never acted on it," Justin reminded him.

"But Trip was so vulnerable, so needy, so relentless."

"That's quite a combination of traits. Do I take it that you just couldn't resist him after all this time?"

"That's partly true. I decided, and I guess that is the truth, that I needed to know what it would be like."

Justin stared into the hazel eyes. "And now you know."

"Now I know," Brian sighed.

"So how was he?"

"Isn't that my line?"

"Not in this case, asshole."

Brian could feel the anger and disappoint bubbling just beneath the surface. He decided he better not try to be a smart ass. "It wasn't half as good as I thought it would be," Brian said honestly. "And I regretted it as soon as it was over."

"Did you now? Mr. no apologies, no regrets."

"You haven't heard me say that for a long time."

"Does that mean that you have regrets and you do apologies?"

"Isn't that what the fuck I'm doing right now?"

"Yeah, I guess it is," Justin admitted. "So Trip wasn't so great. Why?"

"Justin, I don't want to do this."

"Fine, then I'm out of here." Justin slid to the edge of the bed and stood up.

"Wait, don't go, please."

Justin turned and looked at Brian. He sat back down on the bed. "Then answer my question."

Brian made a face that showed how distasteful he found this whole endeavor, but then he said, "He's a total bottom."

Justin laughed, a funny sound somewhere between a snort and a chuckle and a groan. "I thought you liked bottoms."

"Only yours," Brian said softly and Justin knew he meant that.

"So what's the difference between his bottom and mine?"

Brian chuckled. "Let's see. Your bottom is world class and his isn't. Your bottom is flawless and his isn't. You're much more than just a bottom. You're a demanding and creative little shit. You're a consummate top when you want to be. You're my equal and sometimes my better."

Justin felt a tear well up and he swallowed hard trying to keep it at bay. "Seriously?" he whispered.

"Seriously."

Justin leaned in and kissed Brian gently. "Thank you … for that."

"You're welcome. I … I know I still don't tell you often enough how important you are to me, how much you mean to me."

"But when you do say it I know you really mean it," Justin said in a barely audible voice.

"You're so important to me. I can't bear the thought of losing you. That's why I had so much trouble telling you what I had done." Brian hesitated and when Justin didn't say anything he asked, "Why are you still here? Why haven't you walked out on me?"

"My walking out days are long gone. I'm in this for the long haul."

"No shit!" Brian said with a smile. His relief was evident.

"But I didn't say that I had forgiven you just yet," Justin reminded him.

Brian's smile disappeared and he drew in a breath. They obviously weren't done. "So what happens now?"

"What do you want to happen?"

"I want you to stay and not leave me."

"I think I just said I would."

"But you're going to make me pay, aren't you?" Brian asked.

"Oh yeah!"

Brian groaned. "Are you sure you want to stay with me?" Brian felt compelled to ask. "I wouldn't blame you if you left, even though I don't want you too."

"You're not the only one who makes mistakes, you know."

"Like Ian?"

"Yes, like Ian," Justin said with a laugh. They didn't need to use Ethan's correct name anymore. "You took me back."

"I know, but you were worth it." Brian smiled.

"You think so?"

"I know so."

"Truthfully, Brian, are you sorry about what happened with Trip?"

"Yes. It should never have happened. I was stupid. But now that it's out of my system, we'll never have to worry about it again."

"Is that a guarantee?"

"Absolutely. You know my one time only policy."

Justin swatted Brian's chest as the phone rang. "Should I get that? It might actually be my office with some kind of problem," Justin said hesitating. They still had a lot to work out.

"Your office," Brian chuckled. "All grown up." He nodded towards the phone indicating that Justin should pick it up.

"Hello?"

"Brian, is that you? Brian?"

Justin let out a long sigh. "No, Trip, it's not Brian."

"Oh, Justin, could I speak to Brian?"

"Just a minute," Justin said using all his willpower to stop himself going off on Trip. He handed the phone to Brian.

"What is it?" Brian asked abruptly.

"You left without saying goodbye," Trip said in a sultry voice.

"I did that for a reason."

"Why? What reason?"

"Because it was a mistake, Trip. And it will never happen again!"

"It could. I'll be right here if you want me."

"I'll never want you. In fact, I'm not so sure I wanted you the last time."

"What? How can you be so cruel?"

"I'm a mean, selfish asshole. Just ask anybody," Brian said. He pushed 'end' and tossed the phone down onto the bed.

"So that's it?" Justin asked.

"Didn't I make myself clear?"

"Very. But I was waiting for you to tell him to go fuck himself in one of his chairs," Justin said with a chuckle.

"I'd never say anything so crass."

Justin's eyes opened wide. "Of course," Justin snorted. "It was all I could do not to tell him that I wished one of his chairs would collapse around him and he would die a long slow death trapped inside it."

"You have such inventive murder scenarios," Brian said tongue in cheek.

"I'm very inventive," Justin said capturing Brian's lips.

"We can't," Brian said pushing him away.

"What do you mean?"

"I have to get tested."

"Fuck, you didn't bareback with Trip, did you?"

"Fuck no! I'm not an idiot. But I'm not taking any chances with your health."

Justin smiled slightly at Brian's worries. "We could use a condom," Justin said.

"Do we still have some?"

"Right here," Justin said pulling a box from the nightstand.

"It's been so long."

"I know, but you're right. We should be safe."

"I'll get tested tomorrow."

"Good, but I want you to make love to me now."

"And I want that too. I'm sorry I screwed up."

"I'm sorry you screwed up too," Justin said with a wry smile.

"Are we all right?" Brian asked.

"I … think so. Don't get me wrong though. What you did … hurts."

Brian nodded. "I'll do my best never to let it happen again."

"But it could. And it could be me that does it."

Brian raised an eyebrow. "You?"

"I'm not perfect as you can attest to by what happened with Ian." Justin used the wrong name deliberately.

Brian snorted. "We're such losers."

"No, no, we're not. You told me what happened. If we're honest with each other we can get through anything. Any screw up!"

"You think so?"

"I know so."

"Have faith in us, Brian."

"I have faith in you," Brian said smoothing his fingers along Justin's cheek.

"That's good, but I'm just a man and I'll make my share of mistakes too."

"You are a man, a wonderful man."

"On that cheery note, are you going to fuck me, Mr. Kinney?"

"Are you sure?"

"Absolutely."

Brian pulled Justin tight against him and the kiss went on and on. After a bit the kiss ended and Brian leaned his forehead against Justin's. "I love you."

"I know," Justin replied as he began unbuttoning Brian's jeans.

Soon they were naked and hard and ready. Brian sheathed his cock wondering what it would feel like to be inside his lover with the condom between them. And it did feel different. Nothing was quite as sensitive, as barebacking, but it was good nonetheless.

When they both climaxed, Brian leaned against Justin's back and said a silent prayer to whatever deity or life force or spirit that was responsible for giving him this wonderful man.

Brian pulled out gently and got rid of the condom. He handed Justin a tissue and the blond cleaned himself up.

"That was different," Brian said softly.

"Yeah, just like the bad old days."

"Were they bad?" Brian frowned.

"They had their moments."

"I wish I wasn't so fucked up," Brian said.

"We're all fucked up in one way or another."

"Have you forgiven me?" Brian asked.

"Didn't I just prove that I have? Work with me here!" Justin chuckled.

"Thank you."

"You're welcome and you can prove it to me again in a few minutes."

Brian smirked. "I can't believe you took this so well."

"I was fucking angry at you, and hurt, and worried. I honestly didn't know what I was going to do."

"So why didn't I see any of that?" Brian asked genuinely wanting to know.

"First of all, because you didn't try to push me away. Usually that's your first reaction. You think I'm going to leave so you push me out the door before I can do that."

Brian snorted. "I didn't realize I was so predictable." If he didn't love Justin so much, that would have been exactly what he would have done.

"I've got years of experience from the Kinney operating manual."

"I'm lucky that you do."

"Oh yeah! Fucking lucky!"

"You're still angry, aren't you?" Brian frowned.

"There's some anger there. I want to be enough for you, Brian. I want to be the only one. Even if I know realistically that that's not always going to be the case, it doesn't mean that I want it any less."

"I … I wish I could explain my feelings so rationally."

"You could."

Brian shook his head. "I don't think so."

"You don't have to be afraid. I can stand almost anything."

"I don't want to be trapped in Trip's chair when you collapse it around me and leave me to die," Brian tried to joke.

"I'd come back after a day or two, and rescue you."

"Promise?"

"Promise! I'll always be there to rescue you."

"That's the best thing you could ever say to me."

The kiss was long and sensuous and sexual. It was the perfect prelude to the next round of lovemaking.

Domestic Bliss

Power Play

"Hey, Sonny Boy," Brian said into the phone.

"When are you coming to get me?" Gus asked with the pout evident in his voice.

"I'm picking you up tomorrow morning," Brian said.

"Now!"

"I have to go to work, Gus. Tomorrow is Saturday. I'll come get you then."

"Will you bring me a present?" Gus asked coyly.

"A present? What did you have in mind?" Brian asked warily. His son had seemingly an endless list of things he wanted for presents. Brian was wondering if maybe he had spoiled the child a little too often.

"I want a Batman car," Gus stated emphatically.

"Life size?" Brian asked with a smirk.

"What does that mean, Dada?"

"How big, Sonny Boy?"

"Big!"

"Brian," Lindsay's voice came over the phone. "I've already told Gus that he has enough toys and he's not getting a Batman car."

"I see."

"So don't get him one."

Brian could hear Gus in the background going into full tantrum mode about how he needed the Batman car. All the kids in kindergarten had one and he wanted one too.

"He's in rare form today."

"Wait till you get to have him tomorrow. The pleasure will be all yours," Lindsay laughed. "Do you want to say goodbye to your son."

"Tell him I'll see him tomorrow."

"Chicken," Lindsay said. "And remember, no car."

"Yes, mother."

"What was that all about?" Justin asked as Brian replaced the phone in its base.

"Gus just has to have a Batman car because all the other kids in kindergarten have one."

"I see. So are you getting him one?"

"Lindsay says no."

"And we get Gus tomorrow?"

"Yep."

"Shit! He'll be in fine form."

"I know."

"Don't you dare tell me that you have to work and I can look after him," Justin threatened.

"I'd never do that to you, Sunshine," Brian cooed and pulled Justin in for a kiss that left them both breathless.

"I'm not doing it," Justin gasped.

"Of course not," Brian smirked, but just in case Gus was a handful, he would have Justin at the ready. He could convince the boy of anything with the right type of persuasion. He kissed Justin again and wished they had time for a quick fuck before he went to work. However, they both had jobs to go to.

Saturday morning they picked up Gus and went to the museum. The museum ran some kind of kids program that Gus really enjoyed and it meant that Brian and Justin had little to do other than help Gus when he needed it and watch that everything was going all right. No mention of the Batman car had been made since they picked him up. Both men had breathed a sigh of relief thinking that the little boy had forgotten about it.

Following the museum they went to the diner for lunch. Debbie made a big fuss over Gus as she always did and the boy basked in all the attention. He had his usual hot dog and fries. Brian picked at his meal and Justin gobbled his burger.

"What do you want to do this afternoon, Gus?" Brian asked thinking they could go for a swim in the pool.

"Shopping," Gus replied.

"Shopping?" Brian and Justin said in unison.

"He really is your son," Justin chuckled.

"What do you want to get when you go shopping?" Brian asked with a frown.

"Batman car," Gus replied in a matter of fact voice.

"You're not getting a Batman car," Brian said keeping his voice level.

"Pleeease, Dada," Gus wheedled.

"No Gus. Your mother said you weren't getting one."

"But Dada, I really want it." Gus tried to turn on the charm with his best smile.

"Sorry, Sonny Boy, but the answer is no."

Gus crossed his arms on his chest and his lower lip almost hit his knees as he went into full pout mode.

"Gus," Brian said. There was no answer, not that Brian expected one. "Time to take you home."

Gus kept his pout all the way out to the car and all the way back to the munchers. When Brian rang the bell, Lindsay answered the door with a questioning look.

"You're back early."

"Gus is mad at us," Brian said.

"You refused to buy him the car?"

"Exactly."

"Gus, give Daddy and Justin a goodbye hug."

"No," Gus said emphatically.

"Gus," Lindsay cautioned.

"No," Gus repeated.

"Well," Brian said looking at his son. "I guess we'll be going. I'll see you tomorrow, Gus."

"No!" Gus repeated.

"Bye, Gus," Justin said as he and Brian headed out the door.

"He is one stubborn little shit when he wants something," Brian said with a chuckle.

"And where do you suppose he got that from?" Justin asked climbing into the car.

"Not a clue."

Once they were safely home Brian nuzzled Justin's neck and started nibbling on his ear. Justin moaned slightly and pushed Brian away.

"How much longer until you get your next HIV test?" Justin asked.

"Eight weeks."

"Shit!"

"What?"

"I should make you wait until then before I put out."

"That'll be the day. You can barely last eight hours."

"Asshole."

"It's not so bad with a condom, is it?" Brian asked with a frown.

"Nothing's bad with you, you big oaf. But I liked it better the way things were before."

"And you think I didn't?" Brian asked raising his eyebrows.

"Then kindly explain to me why you did what you did."

"Are we going to rehash this all over again?" Brian demanded with a long sigh. He knew he deserved whatever Justin decided to dish out as punishment but he just wanted to forget that his transgression with Trip Bedford had ever happened.

"No, we're not going to rehash it, but it is important that we both realize what we have lost thanks to someone who shall remain nameless."

"Did you check the messages?" Brian asked changing the subject. The last thing he wanted to do was talk about Trip.

"No, I'll look," Justin said deciding to leave it alone for now. He was trying not to nag, but what Brian had done really pissed him off and it still hurt, no matter how much he tried to forgive the big asshole.

Justin saw the light blinking and pushed the button. Immediately he regretted his action as Trip Bedford's voice spoke to him out of the little box.

"Brian, I'm coming to Pittsburgh on Sunday. I'd love to see you. Give me a call and we can arrange something."

Justin resisted the urge to pick up the damn machine and pitch it across the room. Instead he glared at Brian who sat almost stunned having listened to Trip's message with disbelief. The man sounded so casual, like there was no problem between them, like he could just drop in for a visit, like he had every right to expect Brian to meet with him.

"What are you going to do?" Justin asked somewhat breathlessly. He was finding it hard to believe the gall of Trip Bedford.

Brian shook his head. What could he say? Trip's company was one of his oldest and best clients. How could he refuse to see the man? "I don't know," Brian finally said.

"You're not fucking going to see him, are you?" Justin demanded.

"Justin," Brian said running his hand through his hair. "Trip's an important client at Vangard. How can I not meet with him?"

"Give the account to somebody else … or tell him you're sick … or fucking shoot him! I don't care which, but you can't meet him. He sounded like nothing had happened … or does he just expect the same thing to happen this time too?" The tears behind his eyes burned wanting to flow. Justin fought them back.

"You know I can't do any of those things," Brian said slowly.

"So you're going to see him."

Brian nodded. "I'll have to."

"Are you going to fuck him too?" Justin asked as the first tear slid down his cheek.

"Of course not," Brian replied. He stood and started towards Justin. "How could you even think that?"

Justin held up his hand telling Brian not to come any closer. "Let's just say I've had lots of experience with the outcome of these situations."

"If that's the case, then you should know that the one time only policy is firmly in place." Brian made that statement hoping that Justin would see the logic of his words.

"Sometimes you are an even bigger asshole than I can ever fathom," Justin choked out. He turned away stung by Brian's words. They reminded him of the past, a past that he thought Brian had left behind him, but maybe not.

"What did I say?" Brian asked bewildered.

"Of course," Justin snorted, "you don't even get it."

"I was trying to reassure you. I told you it would never happen again."

"So why is Trip here?"

"I don't fucking know! But I won't be fucking him."

"That's what you said before you went to Indianapolis," Justin reminded him.

"I'm sorry. I never meant…"

"And that's the problem. You never meant to do it, but Trip got to you. How do you know it won't happen again?"

"I … I know it won't," Brian said lamely.

"Yeah, right!"

"Justin…"

"Don't bother, Brian. Call him back and tell him you'll be happy to get together. That's what you want anyway, isn't it?" Justin grabbed the car keys from the counter and ran out of the house. He had to get away from Brian, at least for a little while.

"Justin!" Brian yelled as the Jeep peeled away. "Justin…" But it was too late.

Brian paced the den back and forth, back and forth. He willed Justin to come home, but he dreaded it as well. Brian knew he would have to meet with Trip Bedford. It was business and he couldn't refuse, but he knew nothing more would happen between them. Nothing should have ever happened in the first place. If only he could control his goddam dick.

Maybe he could get Trip to accept someone else running his account. Brian mentally ran through the list of account execs at Vangard. Maybe he could get Phil Thompson to take over the account. He was good at his job and would do fine work for Trip's company.

The bigger problem was what to do about Trip coming onto him, and he knew that would happen. From the tone of Trip's voice on the phone it sounded like Trip expected everything to be fine between them, maybe even expected that Brian would want him once again. How was he going to convince the man otherwise without pissing him off and having him take his advertising account elsewhere?

Then an idea struck and he almost chuckled out loud. Justin would kill him, had almost killed him last time, but the idea had worked. Why shouldn't it work again? Brian picked up the phone and dialed Trip's number in Indianapolis.

When Justin finally returned a few hours later Brian was sitting in the family room watching a movie on TV. Justin looked at his partner and sighed. Brian didn't even seem to be upset about what had happened. Maybe Justin had been wrong to forgive Brian. Maybe they didn't have a future together. He turned away deciding to go upstairs and sleep in the guest room.

"Hey, Sunshine," Brian's voice caught him off guard. "I'm glad you decided to come back."

"I was just thinking that I had made a mistake about that," Justin said evenly.

"No mistake," Brian smiled. "In fact I think I've fixed things."

"Fixed things? How?"

"I invited Trip to dinner."

"You fucking did what?" Justin asked his anger rising.

"Now don't get your lovely little knickers in a knot. Remember last time Trip tried to insinuate himself between us?" Justin nodded. "I invited him to dinner at the loft and he saw how good we were together and he backed right off."

"That was then, this is now," Justin said with a frown. "What are you going to show him this time? How tense we are? How much of an impact his actions have had on our relationship? How he's come between us?"

"Not unless that's what you fucking want him to see," Brian retorted.

"Then what?"

"I want him to see what a loving partner I have, one who can forgive me and make me happy."

"And do I?"

"Do you what?"

"Make you happy? I thought we had both been fucking miserable the last couple of weeks."

"But not half as fucking miserable as we would be without each other. We can pull this off, Sunshine. I know we can, and then we'll never have to deal with Trip Bedford again."

"I think you've gone completely off your fucking rocker!"

"How so?"

"All Trip's going to see is that we're pretending everything is all right … when it's fucking not."

Brian winced. "So you've been lying to me ever since I came back, pretending that you forgave me." It was more a statement than a question.

"I … I've done my best to forgive you, but … but it's not so easy. You hurt me."

"But this could prove to you that I'm not going to do that again. I don't want to hurt you. I think this could work."

"I don't see how, Brian," Justin said softly. "I don't see it."

"Will you trust me on this one?" Brian asked moving closer to Justin.

"I'm not sure I trust you on much of anything anymore," Justin admitted.

"This one time, please," Brian begged.

Justin was always a sucker when Brian said please. It was rare that the man used that word and Justin always understood that it was something important when he did.

"If I trust you, will you promise not to hurt me again?"

"I'll do my very best," Brian said with a little smile.

"Okay," Justin sighed. "What the fuck do you want me to do?"

"First, look like you didn't just lose your best friend."

"I feel like I have," Justin sighed again.

"You haven't lost me. We can do this," Brian stated pulling Justin against him. The boy stiffened and then gradually let himself melt into the strong arms. He knew that's where he really wanted to be. No place else would ever do.

Sunday dawned clear and warm. The night before Brian and Justin had finally fucked using a condom and had fallen asleep on much better terms. Justin wasn't completely sold on Brian's plan but he was willing to give it a try, especially since he didn't have any better idea.

They collected Gus in time for lunch and took him shopping with them to the grocery store. Justin was determined to make a spectacular meal that would cause Trip Bedford to drool with hunger and envy. That would be the best revenge.

Gus seemed to have forgotten about the Batman car until they were leaving the market. "Can we go to Toys 'R Us, Dada?" he asked.

"No, Gus, we're not going to the toy store."

"But I need my Batman car," Gus protested hanging back as Brian tried to pull him towards the Jeep.

"Gus, behave. We told you that you're not getting a Batman car."

"I want to go home," Gus pouted.

"We'll take you home in a while," Brian stated reasonably.

"Now."

"Gus," Brian said ominously.

Gus paid no attention. "If I can't have my Batman car, I want to go home."

"I said later," Brian repeated.

"Now," Gus yelled hanging from his father's arm and starting to cry.

Brian looked at Justin who shrugged not really knowing what to do with the stubborn little boy. This was a side of Gus they didn't see very often. Brian scooped up his son, plunked him in the car seat and buckled him in.

"Stay!" Brian said pointing a stern finger and glaring at his son.

"I hate you!" Gus cried tears running down his face.

"Then hate me, but you're not getting a Batman car and we are going to our house," Brian said handing the keys to Justin.

Justin could see that Brian was shaking and was glad he would be driving. Brian hated raw emotion like this and having to discipline Gus in any way was one of his least favorite things. Justin started the car and squeezed Brian's thigh reassuringly. Justin looked into the hazel eyes and saw the tears that Brian was barely holding back.

"It'll be all right," Justin said as he backed the car out of their spot.

"This is the last thing that I need," Brian breathed out leaning his head against the headrest and listening to Gus whimper in the back seat. He closed his eyes hoping to block out the sound.

Gus went up to his room when they reached the house. He closed the door and refused to talk to Brian or Justin. Justin started organizing his dinner while Brian called Lindsay.

"He's locked himself in his room and he refuses to talk to us," Justin heard Brian explain. He listened to the side of the conversation he could hear. "I'd like to bring him home now," Brian was saying. "Why not? He's just trying to win a battle of wills. But we're having company for dinner. It doesn't matter who." This was followed by a long pause and a longer sigh. "Okay, okay, he can stay the night. I'll see what I can do. And no, I won't give in."

"Lindsay wants him to stay with us?" Justin asked as Brian came into the kitchen and replaced the phone on its base.

"Yeah."

"Why?"

"She seems to think he's trying to win a battle with us and if we let him win this one, we'll never be able to stop him."

"She's probably right. You know he has that major stubborn streak going for him."

"So I'm beginning to realize."

"What are we going to do with him when Trip gets here?" Justin felt compelled to ask.

"I guess I'll go up and tell him we're having company and give him the option of staying in his room or coming down and joining us."

"What do you think he'll do?"

"If he's smart, he'll stay in his room with all the toys and books and crap that any kid could ever want."

"Except for a Batman car," Justin reminded him.

"Yeah, except for a fucking Batman car."

"Should I fix him a plate for supper?"

"Lindsay says she has the rule when he gets like this that he doesn't eat until he can come to the table and be civil, so no din-din for the little guy."

"But he didn't get any lunch," Justin protested. He went straight upstairs when we got home."

"I know, but if he's hungry he can always come down and have dinner with us."

Justin groaned. "That's all we need. Trip will love seeing the tension between you and your son and me caught in the middle."

"As I said, any smart kid would stay in his room. Let me go talk to him."

When Brian returned Justin had the dinner in the oven and was laying out the hors d'oeuvres.

"So what was the verdict?"

"He cried some more and said he was staying in his room."

"Do you think he'll be all right?"

Brian shrugged. "What the fuck do I know about kids?"

Just then the doorbell rang. "Show time!" Justin called as Brian went to the door.

Brian opened the door to a smiling Trip. "Come in," he said formally.

"It's so good to see you again," Trip said grabbing Brian in a hug before the man could stop him.

"Nice to see you, Trip," Justin said coming up behind Brian.

Trip released Brian and looked questioningly from one man to the other. "I … I thought it would just be the two of us," he stammered.

"What the fuck would give you that idea?" Brian asked with a smirk.

"Um … nothing. I guess I got the wrong idea."

"I guess you wanted to get the wrong idea," Brian clarified. He glanced at Justin giving him a reassuring smile.

"Come into the family room," Justin said. "We've got hors d'oeuvres and we can have a drink."

"Thanks," Trip said looking around the foyer. "Are these all your work, Justin?" he asked looking at the wall of sketches that Brian had had framed for Justin's graduation.

"Yes, they are," Justin smiled.

"You're very good," Trip stated looking at Justin a little more clearly.

"Thanks."

They sat in the family room picking at the hors d'oeuvres and trying not to drink too much. They made chitchat as best they could. After a while Justin went to look at dinner and Trip slid closer to Brian.

"Why didn't you tell me he was still here?" Trip whispered.

"Where else would he be?"

"I thought you would have got rid of him … or he would have kicked you out."

"Shows what you know," Brian smirked.

"But we were so good together," Trip tried to protest.

"Trip," Brian sighed swiping his hand across his face. "Nothing important happened between us. It was a once only thing … never to be repeated."

"But…"

"So, did I miss anything?" Justin asked returning from the kitchen.

"Not at all," Brian said pulling Justin down next to him and kissing his cheek.

Justin watched Trip grimace and look away. Obviously more had been going on than Brian was letting on.

"This is a great house," Trip said. "Do you do a tour, Brian?"

"We can show you around," Brian replied stressing the word 'we'. "That is, if there's time before dinner's ready."

"Sure," Justin agreed. He didn't mind showing Trip the house, but he wasn't sure he wanted him in their bedroom. Maybe he could sidetrack him when they got upstairs. He led Trip and Brian through the downstairs taking them briefly outside to see the pool. Then they proceeded upstairs. Trip seemed impressed with the house, but Justin was well aware that Trip lived in a huge mansion in Indianapolis. He showed Trip the guest room and then Brian opened the door to their bedroom.

"Justin," a little voice called from behind the door to the remaining bedroom.

"Show Trip around and I'll see what Gus wants," Justin said. He walked over to the door and asked if he could come in. In a tiny voice Gus replied, "Yes," and Justin entered. Trip and Brian went into the bedroom.

"So this is the inner sanctum," Trip said looking around. He glanced at the sculpture in its niche but didn't really see what it was.

"This is it," Brian replied.

Suddenly Brian was shoved against the wall and Trip was kissing him. He reached up and pushed Trip away as hard as he could.

"I told you that was never going to happen again."

"I know you want me," Trip smiled.

"No, no I don't."

"Yes you do."

"Trip, you have to get control of yourself. I'm with Justin and nothing is going to change that."

"I want you. I need you. And I'm going to have you."

"Not going to happen."

"You feel things for me. I know you do," Trip insisted pressing against Brian. His hand reached for Brian's dick and Brian knew it throbbed in response.

"Stop it!" Brian ordered. "This is not right. I don't want you."

"Your dick says otherwise."

Brian laughed. "You have no idea what my dick responds to. Believe me, you're nothing special."

"How … how can you say that to me?" Trip demanded. "After what we did together."

"You mean that pathetic fuck in your house?" Brian asked cruelly. He'd had enough of this. "That was out of pity, nothing else."

"Brian, don't…"

"Trip, give it up. There's nothing between us. You need to get on with your life."

"I have no life without you."

"On the contrary, you will have no life as long as you hold onto this fantasy that we're going to be together."

"It's not a fantasy. It could be so good. Please, Brian."

"After tonight, Trip, I never want to see you again. I'm turning your account over to Phil Thompson. Don't call me ever again."

Trip opened his mouth to tell Brian that he couldn't do that when he heard a little voice say, "Dada."

"I'm here, Gus," Brian replied.

"Sorry, Dada," Gus said seemingly afraid to look at his father. When Gus did look up, he saw Brian open his arms and he ran into them. Brian found his arms full of little boy, one that was crying on his shoulder. He rubbed Gus' back and held the tiny body close. After a minute or two Gus stopped crying and looked into his father's eyes. "Sorry," he repeated.

"I know, Sonny Boy," Brian said softly. "Can you say hello to Mr. Bedford?"

"Hello," Gus said barely glancing at Trip.

"Come on, Gus," Justin said. "Let's go down to the kitchen. Dinner's ready and I'll get you a plate. Come down when you're through up here," Justin said to the two men as he took Gus' hand and lead him out of the room.

"Brian, I don't want to have to withdraw my account from Vangard," Trip threatened. "Don't force me to do that."

"You do what you have to do, Trip. But don't expect anything more than a fucking fantastic ad campaign from me."

Trip glared at Brian. "You'll be sorry. I could do so much more for you than that kid."

"You don't know shit about me and Justin, Trip."

"How can you treat me like this?" Trip asked.

"Because after your father's funeral you stepped across a line just like I did, but at least I realize that what I did was wrong. You haven't figured that out yet."

"It was not wrong," Trip declared. "It was beautiful."

"In your warped view of things maybe it was. To me it was a mercy fuck. Get that through your head once and for all."

Trip stood up very straight. "I've suddenly lost my appetite. I think I'll be going."

"Find your own way out. I have something to do up here," Brian replied with a decided edge to his voice. He just wanted Trip to disappear, to be out of their lives once and for all.

Trip turned abruptly and ran down the hall, then down the stairs and out the front door. He yanked open the door of his rental car and gunned it out into the street. Asshole Brian Kinney would pay one day. Nobody treated him like that.

Justin heard the front door slam as he dished up some dinner for Gus and himself. He smiled knowing Trip Bedford was gone, hopefully forever. He waited for Brian to appear but minutes went by and there was no sign of the man. Justin gave Gus his plate and they sat down at the kitchen table. They wouldn't need the dining room where he had spent so long arranging every detail, setting everything out so meticulously, trying to make just the right impression on someone who obviously didn't matter at all.

Upstairs Brian rolled their rings gently around in his fingers. His other hand caressed the smooth surface of the sculpture that held them. His breathing gradually slowed down. He hated saying those things to Trip, but the man refused to get the message any other way. Brian had thought they were friends, but that had all changed that night in Indianapolis and there was no going back. He released the rings letting them swing slowly inside the sculpture. He turned and headed downstairs.

"Dada, come eat," Gus said as he gobbled down the chicken breast that Justin had cut up for him. "It's good."

"I'm sure it is, Sonny Boy," Brian said leaning in and kissing the top of Justin's head. "I take it he left?" Brian asked.

"Tore out of here like a bat out of Hell. Never even said goodbye," Justin replied looking into Brian's eyes and trying to figure out what had happened between the two men upstairs. When Brian didn't say anything more, Justin had to ask, "What did you tell him?"

"Some cold hard facts that he didn't want to hear."

Justin was about to ask what those entailed when he noted Gus' quizzical look as he studied his father and Justin glancing from one to the other. This wasn't a topic for a little boy to be hearing.

"We should talk about this later," Justin said cocking his head towards Gus. "Let me get you something to eat."

"I'm not very hungry," Brian said.

"I spent a small fortune on this meal, and the least you can do is help me and Gus eat it."

"Yes, dear," Brian said in his falsetto voice. Justin smiled which was about the best thing Brian could hope for at that precise moment.

Gus giggled. "Good, Dada," he said shoveling pieces of chicken and potato into his mouth.

"Eat some vegetables too," Brian told him.

"No!"

"Gus."

"No!"

Brian was about to start in on the boy when he saw Justin's look. "Let it go," Justin mouthed.

"I guess I'll have to eat your vegetables as well as my own," Brian said trying a different tack. "They're the best part of the meal."

Gus frowned and picked up a carrot. He shoved it in his mouth and chewed finding it not bad at all. Brian snagged a piece of broccoli. Gus gave him another look and grabbed some peas.

When Brian reached for a carrot, Gus said, "No Dada, you have your own."

Brian stifled a laugh and took the plate Justin handed him. It was a delicious meal. Trip Bedford didn't know what he was missing in more ways than one.

"Want to watch a movie after dinner, Gus?" Brian asked.

Gus frowned. "Yeah," he said after a minute.

Justin and Brian looked at each other and breathed a collective sigh of relief. They didn't want another battle with the little boy.

"We'll let you pick what you want to see," Brian said.

"Okay," Gus smiled.

"You ready for Spongebob?" Justin chuckled

"Between Gus and Trip I've had enough power plays pulled on me today. I'll be happy to watch anything that doesn't involve an argument or coercion."

"Me too," Justin agreed.

Spongebob would be just the mindless nonsense that the two adults craved after all the battles of will they had just gone through.

Domestic Bliss

Sex, Lies, and ...

Brian thrust into Justin hard. He wanted this to be good for both of them. He continued to ram Justin's sweet ass feeling his orgasm build. He reached beneath Justin and started stroking him off. He could feel Justin freeze for a second and then quickly he was coming in Brian's hand. Brian tugged a few more times as he felt Justin shudder beneath him. Then Brian was coming filling the condom and finally rolling away. He looked over at Justin to see what was on the young man's face. It wasn't the expression he was looking for.

"Was it good for you?" Justin asked staring up at the ceiling of their bedroom.

"Yeah," Brian replied reaching for a cigarette. He had been smoking a lot more since the Trip thing. And now he was lying; something he never did. It hadn't been very good, mediocre at best. He frowned at that realization as he flicked his lighter.

"Don't," Justin said touching his hand. That simple gesture was almost more intimate than what they had just done.

Brian set the cigarette back on the nightstand. He turned to look into Justin's eyes. "It's not that we're using condoms again, is it?"

Justin shook his head, his eyes suddenly moist. "It's all different somehow."

"I know. Why?"

"I don't know, and … you lied to me just now. You never used to lie."

"I lied because I wanted it to be the truth."

"But if it's not the truth, it's still a lie."

"What the fuck are we doing, Justin? Do you want me to move out?" Brian asked feeling the tightness in his chest.

"No! God, no. I don't want you to go."

"Then something has to give. We're just going through the motions. I hate it."

"So do I."

"Do you think we should go talk to Dr. Jamison?" Brian asked as the thought occurred to him. Dr. Frank Jamison had helped them a long time ago when things had been rocky between them.

Justin shrugged. "I don't know," he said softly. "I know I'm being stupid not letting this go, but I don't seem to be able to."

"I really am sorry that I fucked things up. Trip never should have happened, but he did, so we have to go on from there."

"Then maybe we should call Frank tomorrow," Justin said. "We need to do something before it's too late." Justin rolled over facing away from Brian in their huge bed.

Brian stared at Justin's back and wondered if maybe it wasn't already too late.

-----

The next morning Brian and Justin showered separately and met at the kitchen table for coffee and a muffin. They took surreptitious glances at each other neither wanting to broach the topic of counseling.

Finally Justin had to settle what was going to happen. "Are you going to call Dr. Jamison or should I?"

Brian winced at the reminder of the trouble they were in. "I can call from the office."

"So can I?" Justin volunteered.

"Are we going to argue about this too?"

"We haven't been arguing," Justin insisted.

"Maybe that's part of the problem. We need to get this all out in the open. A good fight might do that."

"All you want is the makeup sex."

"True," Brian smirked.

Justin giggled. For a split second he remembered why he was still there. "I'll call when I get to work. Do we want an appointment as soon as possible?"

"That might be best," Brian said.

"Brian, I'm sorry, but I don't know what else to do."

"I'm the one who fucking screwed up. Don't be sorry. You feel what you feel."

"It's what I don't feel anymore that scares me." Justin walked quickly out of the kitchen. He needed to get to work, but more than that he needed to get away from Brian. He couldn't stand the look of pain in Brian's eyes, especially when he knew it was beyond his power to fix it.

-----

When Justin arrived home from work he found Brian already there playing chess with Gus.

"Gus, I didn't know you were coming over today."

"Hey, Justin. Mommy had a meeting that came up un … unex…"

"Unexpectedly," Brian supplied. "Lindsay asked me to pick up Gus from kindergarten. Can he stay for dinner, Jus, can he, huh, huh, huh?" Brian teased.

"Of course, he can," Justin said with a slight smile.

Brian had hoped for more of a reaction than that. "I guess I better rustle up something for us to eat," Justin said and disappeared into the kitchen.

"We can order pizza," Brian suggested.

"I have some chicken that I can make. It'll only take a half hour."

"If you're sure," Brian replied.

"I'm sure," Justin called out. "I'm fucking sure," he muttered to himself. He resented Brian sitting and playing with Gus while he did all the work. In fact, he resented just about everything that Brian did these days.

"Dr. Jamison will see us day after tomorrow at four pm," Justin said as he put the chicken in the frying pan to brown it.

"That's good," Brian said wishing Justin hadn't mentioned that in front of Gus.

"Are you sick, Dada?" Gus asked with a frown.

"No, no, it's just a checkup."

"A reality checkup," Justin muttered to himself as he made salad.

Dinner was very quiet. Gus sat and watched his father and Justin eat in silence. He tried to figure out what was wrong. Maybe it had something to do with this doctor's appointment. But his father had said it was just a checkup. He'd had those, and they weren't scary.

"Justin, are you mad at me?" Gus asked finally, unable to come up with any other reason for Justin being so quiet. "You didn't ask me about school."

"I'm sorry, Gus," Justin said with a sigh. "What did you do in school today?"

"I made a picture of you and Dada," Gus said proudly.

"Did you bring it home with you?" Justin asked half heartedly.

"It had to dry," Gus said munching on a carrot.

"But you'll show Justin when you bring it home, won't you, Gus?" Brian asked prompting his son to keep Justin talking.

"Yes," Gus said looking at Justin who was pushing salad around his plate. "If Justin wants to see it."

"Oh," Justin sighed. "Sure, Gus." He stood and picked up his plate. I think I'll go for a walk. I could use some fresh air." He looked pointedly at Brian.

"Can I come?" Gus asked. "I like walks."

"Not this time, Gus. Don't you have to take him home?"

"I guess so," Brian said taking his plate to the sink and returning for Gus'.

Justin turned and walked out the front door of the house.

"What's wrong with Justin?" Gus asked with a frown. "Is he sick?"

"Nothing's wrong, Gus. Let's get your bag and I'll take you home."

"I want to walk with Justin," Gus whined. "You come too, Dada."

"Justin wants to be alone, and it's time I took you to your mother." Brian scooped Gus up and grabbed his bag from beside the front door. He buckled Gus into the car and roared off towards Lindsay's. On the way down the street they passed Justin walking along the sidewalk.

"Justin," Gus called but Justin paid them no attention. "I want Justin," Gus whimpered.

"So do I, Sonny Boy, so do I."

-----

A couple of days later Brian and Justin walked into Frank Jamison's office. The receptionist, Grace, greeted them.

"Mr. Kinney, Mr. Taylor, nice to see you again."

"Thanks," Brian replied. Justin stayed silent, unusual for him.

"If you'll have a seat, the doctor is just finishing up with a patient. He will see you shortly."

Brian and Justin sat down.

"Are you okay with doing this?" Brian asked.

"I said I was," Justin replied curtly.

"What the fuck's got into you?"

Justin glared at Brian always amazed by Brian's insensitivity to some things.

Moments later the door to Dr. Jamison's office opened and a woman came out. Frank followed her and said goodbye. When she had exited the office he walked over to Brian and Justin who stood and shook his hand.

"It's nice to see you both again," the doctor began, "but I hope it's nothing serious." When neither man replied, Frank motioned for them to enter his office. He closed the door behind them and walked around his desk taking his customary seat there. "So, what can I do for you?"

Brian looked at Justin who looked at the floor. Brian cleared his throat but nothing seemed to want to come out.

"Looks like some things never change," Frank said with a chuckle. "Don't both of you speak at once."

"Um … doc," Brian said hesitantly. "I … I've done something that has upset Justin a great deal. I've apologized profusely but it doesn't seem to have made any difference. Can you help us?"

"Has Justin accepted your apology?" Frank remembered how difficult it was for Brian to apologize. This must be something big.

Brian looked at Justin who continued to stare at the floor. Finally Brian said, "He said he did, but nothing's the same as it was before."

"Do you agree with that, Justin?" Frank asked.

Justin nodded. "Nothing is the same."

"So maybe we better go back a step, and you can tell me what you did that you're apologizing for." Frank stared at Brian.

Brian blinked and looked at the floor. "I fucked a guy after we had agreed that we wouldn't do that."

"I see. Was this a random thing or was the man something special?"

Justin glanced at Brian waiting to hear how he would answer that. "It … it wasn't random, but he's nothing special," Brian said softly. He ventured a glance at Justin. Justin's blue eyes told him nothing.

"So are you telling me that you risked your relationship with Justin over someone who was not very special?" Frank asked.

Brian sighed. "This man … Trip Bedford, we'd been attracted to each other since we first met, but I made it clear that nothing would ever happen."

"Then why did it?" Frank probed when Brian seemed to hesitate.

"His father died and I went out to Indianapolis to be with him."

"And Justin didn't go?"

"No."

"Why didn't you go, Justin?"

"I had just started my first real job. I could hardly take the first week off. And Brian promised…" Justin's voice trailed off as he continued to study the floor near his feet.

"It was circumstance that threw you together with Trip?" Frank continued.

"I guess you could say that. He was in bad shape. He and his father were very close. They lived in the same house."

"And so it happened," Frank clarified. "For whatever reasons."

"Yeah," Brian agreed. "I'm not trying to make excuses."

"I didn't think you were. What happened when you returned from Indianapolis?"

"I was a coward. I didn't know how to tell Justin," Brian explained. He didn't want to sound like he was whining, but he was sure that's how it came out.

"You could have kept it a secret," Frank offered.

"Believe me, I considered that," Brian admitted.

"Why didn't you?"

"Justin and I … we … we have a committed relationship. We don't use condoms anymore … or we didn't until this happened."

"And you didn't want to put Justin at risk?"

"Of course not. But how could I explain why we had to go back to using condoms without telling him the truth."

"The truth is usually a good idea," Frank observed.

"Usually," Brian said with a grimace.

"How did Justin take the news?"

Brian looked at Justin. "I'm pretty sure he had already figured it out."

"Had you, Justin?"

Justin nodded. "I could tell something was wrong as soon as Brian walked in. It didn't take a rocket scientist to guess what it was."

"You made Brian tell you though?"

"I wanted to hear him say it," Justin said hoping that didn't sound too petulant. "I wanted him to explain."

"And did he?"

"Not completely. I knew he and Trip had always wanted to get together, Trip more than Brian. I thought I could trust Brian even when I knew I couldn't trust Trip."

"So Brian's explanation didn't satisfy you?"

Justin shook his head. "I was hurt. I couldn't believe that Brian had betrayed us. I'm still hurt."

"Is that why you can't forgive him?"

"I did forgive him," Justin said simply.

"Then what's the problem."

"I forgave him with words, but it's not so easy to forgive him in my heart and soul. I know he's sorry, but what he did changed everything between us."

"How so?" Frank asked.

Justin shook his head. "I'm not sure I can explain it."

"Please try."

Justin sighed. "It's like it's all been spoiled. I don't think we can ever get back to where we were before."

Brian winced at Justin's words. He opened his mouth to say something but Frank raised his hand indicating that he should stay silent.

"How has it been spoiled?" Frank pursued.

"We were so happy before Brian went to Indianapolis. We had moved into our new house. We have great neighbors. I graduated from PIFA and Brian threw me this amazing party, even invited my father. I had a new job that I was proud of."

"So everything was going well."

Justin nodded. "I felt like we had finally got it right."

"And then Brian told you what happened."

"He didn't have to. I knew as soon as he walked through the door and was too tired to kiss me … or fuck me. I knew something had happened between him and Trip."

"And yet you forgave him … after all the things he had ruined?" Frank asked puzzled as to why Justin had done that.

"It's not like I'm blameless in this relationship. I've done my share of bad things and Brian has forgiven me."

"Things like Trip Bedford?"

"Exactly like that. His name was Ethan Gold. And Brian took me back."

"You felt you had to forgive Brian like he had forgiven you."

"Yes. And I really wanted to forgive him. I thought I could."

"But deep down you didn't forgive him, did you, Justin?"

Justin shook his head and stared at the floor once again. He watched a teardrop fall between his feet.

"I guess the big question now is can you ever forgive Brian?"

Brian looked at Justin with his head hanging down to his knees. At that moment he doubted that he would ever be forgiven. And he didn't really blame Justin. He had fucked up big time.

"Do you think you will ever forgive Brian, Justin?" Frank asked.

"I … I want to," Justin said without looking up. "But I don't know if I can. I've been trying."

"Have you … really?" Frank asked.

"Yes, as far as I can do it … I have," Justin said uncertainly.

"Then why are you here, Justin?"

"I thought you could help us, like you did before."

"I can only help those who want my help. Do you want to fix this?"

"God yes," Justin sobbed finally let the tears go. His shoulders shook as he realized how close they were to losing it all.

"Justin," Brian's strangled voice gasped. "Please don't, Justin. I'm so sorry."

"I can't help it," Justin gulped.

And then Brian pulled Justin out of his chair and into his arms. Justin let it happen, allowed himself a few minutes to feel safe in the strong arms, let the tears he had been fighting for weeks fall.

After a bit Justin realized that he had stopped crying and yet he was shaking like he was still sobbing. He could feel Brian trembling against him. He raised his face from Brian's chest and saw the tears streaming down Brian's cheeks.

"Brian," he whispered. "Brian, please stop."

Justin had never seen Brian so broken, so wracked with guilt.

"I've ruined it all," Brian gasped. "I should move out and let you get on with your life."

"I have no life without you," Justin said in a very small voice. His hands clasped Brian's cheeks and he forced Brian to look into his eyes. "I don't want this to be over. I want to fix it."

"I do too," Brian admitted. "But it sounded like you had given up, that there was no hope of that."

"I just don't know. I don't know how to do it."

"That's what I'm here for," Frank said finally intervening with the two desolate men. "Can you sit down and we'll talk about this?"

Justin pulled back from Brian who wiped at his eyes not wanting Frank to see what a fucking weak little faggot he was. He had forgotten that Frank was even there.

"I think that's the most honest we've been with each other since I came back from Indianapolis," Brian said sitting down and wiping his face.

"That's a good start," Frank said softly. "Pussyfooting around something this important is a slow death. It's time it all came out in the open," Frank advised.

"Do you think there's any hope for us?" Justin asked. He felt Brian's hand reach for his and he let Brian's fingers link through his own. Then he risked a glance at Brian's beautiful face. He didn't know what he expected to see, but the smile that Brian had when Justin hadn't pulled his hand away was truly glorious. Justin realized that it was a long time since he had really let Brian touch him in any way, shape or form. He smiled back, not much but just enough to let Brian know that there was still a tiny bit of hope left in him.

"I think you just answered your own question, Justin."

"Maybe so," Justin agreed giving Brian's hand a slight squeeze.

"I think we should stop there for today, but I'm going to give you some homework."

"Homework?" Brian asked.

"I finally got out of school and you're giving me homework?" Justin asked with a little mischievous grin. It was not lost on Brian or Frank. They both took the attempt at humor as a good sign.

"It's not book larning," Frank drawled. "I want you each to think of two times in your relationship when you have been really happy. Don't tell each other what they are, but come next week prepared to discuss them with each other."

"Okay," Brian agreed. "You know, Frank, we didn't accomplish much today but I feel better already."

"That's what I like to hear. And if you feel better then we did accomplish a great deal. How do you feel, Justin?"

"Better … a bit."

"That's good too. Every little bit of progress helps. I'll see you in a couple of days. Check the time with Grace at the desk."

"Thanks Frank," Brian said as he headed for the door. He realized Justin's hand was still clasped in his, and he knew he never wanted to let it go.

A few minutes later they walked out of the door of Frank's building. Their hands were still joined together.

"Home?" Brian asked.

"I guess so."

"Do you remember the first appointment we ever had with Frank?" Brian asked as they walked to the car.

"Yeah," Justin said softly. "I was having those terrible nightmares that were ruining our relationship."

"He helped us then."

"Yes, he did."

"Maybe he can help us now."

"I fucking hope so," Justin breathed.

"Do you remember the rest of that day?"

"Vaguely," Justin said as Brian finally released his hand and he climbed into the car.

"We picked up takeout on the way home. Want to get some Thai?"

"Sure," Justin said. "Should I call in the order and we can stop on the way by." Brian nodded and Justin pulled out his cell and placed the order.

Eventually they walked into their home carrying the bag of takeout. Justin set it out on the counter in the kitchen and Brian got plates and started dishing it up.

"Want a beer?" Justin asked.

"Several," Brian replied as he took the beer and then handed Justin a plate of food.

"The first time we saw Frank we were both disheartened. I remember feeling so much worse than when we went in there. I wonder why I feel better this time." Justin sat down at the kitchen table and took a bite of the food.

"Maybe it's because we know that Frank helped us before. I want him to work his magic again."

"There was no magic," Justin said with a funny grin. "He made me face things I didn't want to face."

"I'm not sure it'll be that easy this time," Brian said shaking his head. "I am such a fucking asshole. All those years that everyone told me that and I would just smirk. But it's actually true."

"Yeah, but you've always been an asshole with a big heart," Justin said trying to comfort Brian.

"Do you think we can get past this?"

Justin shrugged. "Do you?"

"I fucking hope so!"

Justin chuckled. "Me too."

"Have you thought of your two times in our relationship that you were truly happy?" Brian asked.

"I have something in mind. What about you?"

"I can think of once or twice."

"You can?" Justin asked with a little grin.

"I can," Brian grinned back.

"That first night after we went to see Frank, I remember neither one of us wanted to talk. I hated that silence."

"It was pretty grating," Brian admitted. "But I seem to remember that we eventually got past it."

"Yeah, we did," Justin smiled. "This is more than we've talked since…"

"I know. I guess that's part of Frank's strategy to help us. He gave us that homework to make us think and maybe to force us to realize what we would be losing if we don't fix this."

"You're right, and I … don't want to lose what we had. I have been so afraid that we already had lost it though."

"Another beer?" Brian asked standing up and moving to the fridge.

"Sure," Justin replied. "Get me drunk and have your way with me."

"I don't want my way with you if you don't want it too."

Justin glanced at Brian knowing that lately they had not shared the connection they usually did during sex. He shook his head.

"Hoover," Brian said suddenly setting a beer in front of Justin.

Justin giggled. "That's what you called me that night because I kissed you and sucked so hard you thought I was stronger than any vacuum."

"You have the best mouth," Brian said running his thumb along Justin's lower lip.

Justin sucked the thumb into his mouth and Brian let out a small moan.

"I love you," Brian whispered.

"That's what you said that night that spurred the Hoover assault," Justin remembered.

"I know I don't say it enough, but I do love you."

"I know. We've come so far. We need to fix this."

"Let's start with a kiss," Brian said.

Brian pulled Justin into his arms. His lips molded onto Justin's and he used every technique he had ever found effective to kiss Justin's socks off. When he finally released his lover, Justin let out a gasp followed by a small moan.

"That was the best kiss I've ever had. Are you trying to get this into my top two happiest moments?"

"There's a thought," Brian smirked. That hadn't been his plan at all, but it wasn't a bad one nonetheless.

"Let me see if I can top that," Justin said.

"Hey, that's one of my favorite games," Brian laughed before Justin sucked his top lip into his mouth. The kiss went on and on with tongue and spit swapping and general titillation. By the time Justin was through, they were both rock hard.

"Bed?" Brian asked.

Justin nodded. For the first time in ages he was actually looking forward to making love with Brian.

Domestic Bliss

Fact and Fantasy

The next morning Justin awoke before Brian. He felt Brian's long body spooned up against his back. Gently and slowly he turned so he could look at Brian. Brian was worthy of study.

Justin noted the handsome face and tiny wrinkles around the eyes. He smiled as he knew he would never mention them to his partner. Brian was very vain about his looks even after all this time. But that was all right with Justin. He appreciated Brian's looks. He appreciated being with the handsomest man in all of Pittsburgh, in all the world as far as he was concerned.

But it was Brian's inner beauty that had always attracted Justin as much as his outer beauty had been the first draw. He remembered being stunned by the beautiful Mr. Kinney the first night they had found each other under that lamppost on Liberty Avenue. But it had been the Brian who had taken him to the hospital for the birth of his son, the Brian who had asked for his advice on the name for the baby and the Brian who had taken his virginity with caring and concern that he had fallen in love with.

They had been through so much, the bashing and its aftermath, Ethan, Noel and now Trip. Brian was too attractive for his own good. And yet Justin didn't really blame Brian. Brian had always been honest about fucking, and he had been honest about being with Trip even if he hadn't wanted to tell Justin.

It was something that was inside Justin that was causing the problems between them. He hated to admit it but he knew that was the truth. Brian didn't want Trip Bedford. Justin knew that. So why couldn't he let the whole incident go? He had tried to do that but he just couldn't quite relinquish the hurt and … disappointment. That was it. It was the disappointment in their relationship. The fact that it hadn't been strong enough to resist Trip, that someone had been able to come between what he had thought was their rock solid relationship. That was what made Justin scared. He couldn't go back to being the naïve little princess expecting to live happily ever after with his handsome prince. They would never have that fantasy again, and Justin didn't like that at all.

Justin sighed as his finger slid along Brian's lips. He remembered those kisses from the night before. He had never been so turned on in … forever. Brian was still the best lover on the planet. But Justin knew deep inside him that he had held back just a bit, refusing or unable once again to give himself totally to Brian. He wondered if that would ever change, if maybe Dr. Jamison could make it change.

"You're thinking too much," Brian said softly.

"How do you know I'm thinking?" Justin chuckled. Brian could still surprise him.

"I know you," Brian said simply. "Plus I could smell the burning rubber from the spinning wheels in your head."

"That's a weird image."

"Yeah," Brian laughed. "Somewhere between my brain and my lips it got convoluted. Maybe it was your finger on those lips that distracted me."

Justin rolled onto his back. He stared at the ceiling not saying anything.

"Would you prefer if I went back to sleep and didn't talk to you?" Brian asked.

"I was thinking."

"No shit!"

"About what we did last night."

"And the verdict was?"

"You're the world's best kisser."

"Thanks," Brian chuckled. "But after that things went downhill."

Justin turned his head to look at Brian. "You felt it."

"I know you."

"You already said that."

"It's true. I felt when you turned off."

"I didn't turn off."

"Then … I felt when you drew back, didn't let it happen, had to force it."

"Shit! I was trying," Justin whispered.

"Maybe that's the problem. We didn't used to have to try. It just happened … naturally."

"That's what I want back, Brian," Justin said sincerely. "How do I stop myself from drawing back, from not giving myself to you?"

"I wish the fuck I could answer that."

"So do I."

"That's why we're going to see Frank. Maybe he can answer that," Brian said.

"Maybe."

They both got up and started getting ready for work. They wouldn't see Frank until the following day. That seemed like forever.

Justin arrived at Hartford Graphics some time later. He made his way through the reception area into the animation studio in the back. A couple of his co-workers were already there working on some project. Justin went to his desk and set his bag down. He went back to the small kitchen area and poured himself a coffee. He carried it back to his desk and picked up his phone punching in the numbers to retrieve his messages.

There was only one message, from his boss reminding all employees of a meeting at twelve noon that day. Justin wondered what the meeting was all about, but he deleted the message and hung up the phone.

At twelve noon everyone assembled in the meeting room next to the boss' office. Mr. Hartford came in looking rather subdued. He asked for their attention and everyone fell silent, sensing that something wasn't right.

"Ladies and gentlemen, I called you together to give you some interesting news. I have sold Hartford Graphics to JB3 Industries. I will be clearing out my office and turning the company over to them. A new manager will speak to you some time tomorrow."

There was a collective gasp.

"But what about us?" someone called out. "Will we still have jobs?"

"As far as I know you will. I imagine the new owner will make some changes, but I wouldn't think he would do anything too drastic."

"But there are no guarantees of that?"

Mr. Hartford shook his head. "Thank you all for your hard work over the years. I hope everything works out for you." With that he left the room.

"Well, fuck him," Kyle said. He was one of the artists that Justin worked with. "I've been here for almost ten years. I better not lose this job."

Everyone agreed with that as they all went back to their work wondering if they would be doing the same job tomorrow or the day after.

When Justin arrived home from work he told Brian about the sale of the company. Brian raised an eyebrow.

"I thought that company was doing really well," Brian observed. "Why would Hartford sell?"

"That's what I don't understand. He never gave us any reasons for the sale."

"He must have got one helluva price for it then."

"You think it was the money?" Justin asked.

"Has to be."

"Shit! I liked working there."

"Who says you still can't?"

"The new owner is going to make some changes," Justin explained. "And I'm low man on the totem pole. You know, last hired, first fired."

"But if the company is doing well, there should be no reason to cut back."

"I hope you're right," Justin said.

The next day Justin went to work filled with apprehension about what the new owner would do. On his messages there was the voice of a man introducing himself as the new manager of Hartford Graphics. He summoned his employees to another noon meeting.

Justin and Kyle had a quick conference about what they expected from this man. Then they got back to work, not wanting anybody to think they were slacking off.

At noon a lot of worried employees piled into the meeting room. Soon after, a little runt of a man walked in. He slapped down a folder on the conference table and looked around at the assembled group.

"My name is Alec Bischoff," he proceeded to tell them. "I will be managing this company from now on. I've been going through the roster of employees. I intend to weed out and get rid of any dead wood around here. I hope I make myself clear. Over the next couple of weeks I will personally meet with each of you and check to see if your work measures up. At the end of that time I will make some hard decisions. That's all for now."

Alec Bischoff picked up his folder and marched out of the room.

"What a pompous ass!" Kyle whispered to Justin.

"I think he suffers from small man's disease."

"What's that?"

"Small men who try to make themselves seem important by lording it over everybody else."

"You got that right," Kyle chuckled. "Justin, I'm worried," Kyle continued as the group made their way out of the meeting room. "It sounds like he's going to fire some people. He just isn't sure who yet."

"That's what it sounds like," Justin ruefully agreed.

"Fuck! I need this job."

"Don't we all? But you've been here a long time, Kyle. I'm the new guy, so it will probably be me."

"That would hardly be fair. You do some of the best work in the whole place."

"You think so?" Justin smiled.

"Absolutely."

"Thanks for telling me that. It may make getting fired a little easier."

"Let's go across the road to the deli and I'll buy you lunch," Kyle offered.

"I hope it isn't my last lunch here," Justin muttered as they went out the door.

At five o'clock Brian was waiting outside Dr. Jamison's building. He kept looking up and down the street trying to spot Justin. Suddenly his cell phone rang and he pulled it out of his pocket.

"Where the fuck are you? We're already late."

"Sorry but I just couldn't leave early. I'm in a cab and should be there in about five minutes. Go on in and I'll meet you there."

"Sure."

Brian went up to the office where Frank was waiting for them. He seemed surprised when Brian walked in late and alone.

"I was beginning to think you weren't coming," Frank said. "Where's Justin?"

"He's on his way. Should be here in five minutes or so."

"Have a seat. Maybe we can talk before he gets here."

Brian raised an eyebrow but sat down looking questioningly at Frank. "What do we need to talk about?"

"Don't get your knickers in a knot. I just wanted to tell you that Justin seems very subdued and not totally committed to this process. Would you agree?"

Brian frowned. He didn't want to admit it, but he knew Frank was right. "I don't think he feels we can fix this," Brian finally said.

"And why is that?"

"Because I hurt him too much this time."

"And hasn't he hurt you?"

Brian winced. "Yes, but not like this."

"I think what he did was very much like this, and maybe that's why he's having so much trouble with it."

"What do you mean?"

"You forgave him after Ethan. He's not sure he can forgive you. It makes him afraid to really try in case he fails."

Brian thought about that for a minute. "But he says he's trying."

"He is, but somewhere deep inside he's afraid."

"You're sure about that?"

"There's nothing a hundred percent in this business but that would be my best guess."

"So … what can we do about it?"

"The usual answer is time." Brian grimaced. He wasn't sure how much more of Justin pulling away from him he could stand. "Part of the reason I gave you the homework I did is that I want you two to remember why you're together."

"I see."

"So I hope you have chosen wisely."

"That makes two of us."

There was a gentle knock on the door and Justin appeared. "Sorry I'm late," he said.

"Come in and sit down," Frank gestured.

Justin looked from Brian to Frank as he sat down. "Were you talking about me?"

"Yes, we were," Frank said bluntly.

"I don't think that's fair when I'm not here to defend myself."

"What makes you think you would need to defend yourself?"

Justin looked at Brian. "I'm the one with the problem."

"Not of your own creation, however," Frank replied.

Justin nodded but it didn't make him feel a whole lot better.

"Since we're getting somewhat of a late start, I'd like to hear what incidents you chose that made you really happy," Frank stated. "Who'd like to go first?"

"I will," Justin said. "It was actually easy."

"Really?" Brian asked wondering if it would be all about sex.

Justin smiled a bit. "You probably think I'm going to pick that first night we were together." Brian grinned. "And I am. But not for the reason you're thinking. The sex was great, but then I had nothing to compare it to. But that wasn't what made me happy. It made me horny and lustful and sated and … then wanting more. Always more. The happy part came when you took me to the hospital with you and asked me to name Gus. I was so happy that you let me be part of that. You hardly knew me, yet you trusted me to be part of something so important."

Brian smiled and reached for Justin's hand giving it a squeeze. "I guess I knew you were somebody special right from the first moment."

"Am I … somebody special?"

"Justin," Brian replied, the hurt evident in his voice. "Doubt everything else, but never doubt that you are special … to me … to everyone."

Justin gave a faint smile. "Thank you," was all he said.

"Brian, what example of being happy did you select?" Frank asked.

"The night after the bashing when you let me touch you for the first time, when you let me make love to you," Brian said baring his soul as he looked into Justin's eyes. He cleared his throat trying to get control of his emotions.

"Why did you pick that time?" Frank inquired.

"I …" Brian began, still staring into Justin's eyes. "I've never had anyone depend on me like that, trust me like that. It was special."

"Justin, what is your second choice?"

"It's actually my first choice, if you want to call it the happiest."

"Okay, when was that?"

Brian studied Justin wondering what he would identify as the happiest moment.

"My graduation day," Justin said softly. "Brian got my father to come to it. He made this amazing wall of pictures of my family and friends. He convinced my father to come to the celebration. It was the most … magnificent gesture that he could have made."

Frank was familiar with Justin's rocky relationship with his father. He didn't need to ask more. He looked at Brian who wiped at a tear that threatened to drop onto his impeccable suit.

"Brian, do you have a second choice?"

"Like Justin, it's actually my first choice," Brian said.

"Saving the best for last," Frank chuckled.

"You could say that," Brian admitted. "I was going to say I was happiest when we found our home, but we have so many good memories from there. The one Justin just mentioned is certainly high on the list. But I was also thinking of another time that I was very happy," Brian said staring into Justin's eyes.

"Justin went to New York to study for several months. I was afraid he might never come back. I visited him several times, but one weekend I brought Gus with me and we had the best time."

"Yeah, we did," Justin smiled holding onto Brian's hand a little tighter. "Gus was so cute that weekend."

"He kept asking me 'Where's Justin?' all the way there, like you might be waiting just around every corner."

"Remember Daisy and the ride through Central Park?" Justin asked.

"And the hot dog you forced me to eat."

"I didn't force you, Gus did, and you enjoyed every mouthful."

"Yeah, I did."

"That was a great weekend, Brian."

"Yeah."

"Seems we have a consensus on this one."

Both men nodded. Frank looked them up and down waiting for them to come to the same conclusion that he had. When neither man spoke he knew he had to prod a little bit.

"Do you realize what your choices mean?" he asked.

"That we have had happy times?" Brian replied.

"Yes, but think about what you chose as the happy moments."

"Yeah?" Justin frowned trying to understand what Frank was getting at.

"None of them has much to do with sex," Frank finally pointed out.

Brian saw the light first. "Even the one I chose about making love after the bashing was about … love, not sex."

"Exactly."

"And neither of mine were about sex," Justin added.

"So what does that mean?" Brian frowned.

"Let me ask you a question in return," Frank continued. "Were you happy with Trip, Brian?"

Brian shook his head scrunching up his face in revulsion. "I wish it had never happened."

"And Justin, were you happy with Ethan?"

"I thought I was at first, but it wasn't real. It was a fantasy that he led me to believe and then he betrayed me."

"Has Brian ever betrayed you?"

"With Trip."

"I guess you could call it that, but it doesn't seem like a very important part of your relationship in the greater scheme of things. If I asked you what was the worst time in your relationship, what would you say?"

"The bashing," they both replied simultaneously.

"So how high does the Trip thing rank?"

"Pretty high," Justin felt compelled to say.

"It seems to me that you have put up with a lot of Brian, pardon my French, fucking around since you two have been together."

"But he never cared about any of them," Justin protested.

"Did you care about Trip, Brian?"

"A little, but not nearly as much as Justin seems to think. I didn't want to kick him when he was down."

"So you fucked him instead."

Brian glared at Justin. "He means nothing to me. I don't know how many more times I can say that."

"You can say it as many times as you like, but it doesn't make it true."

"Are you saying Brian is lying to you, Justin?" Frank asked. If there was one thing he knew about Brian Kinney, it was that he didn't lie.

"He thinks he means it, but under the right circumstances…" Justin let his voice trail off.

"It won't ever happen again," Brian stated.

Justin stared at the floor.

"Look at me, Justin. I mean it."

Justin looked up. "How can you promise that when you don't know that would be the case?"

"I know."

"You do?" Justin asked.

"Is that what's been bothering you? Are you entertaining the idea that I would seek out Trip again?"

"There's nothing entertaining about the idea, and probably Trip will be the one doing the seeking."

Brian shook his head. "I'd tell him to fuck off. I mean it."

"Truthfully?"

"Absolutely."

"I … I wish I could believe that."

"And until you do, we're not solving anything."

"Justin, may I suggest something," Frank asked.

"Um … sure. It can't do anything but help."

"Why don't you sit down and make a list of what will happen if things continue the way they are, and then balance it out with a list of what will happen if you truly forgive Brian."

"But what good will that do?" Justin sighed in frustration. "I know what I'm going to lose if we can't fix this. I know it all rationally, but I don't feel it inside me. I don't feel anything anymore."

"You did a few minutes ago when you were holding Brian's hand."

"That … that was different."

"It told me that you still have those feelings. They're there but you choose not to let them out."

"I do?"

Frank nodded. "Try the exercise and bring the list with you to our next meeting."

"Okay," Justin said slowly.

"I think that's enough for today. I'll see you again in a couple of days."

Brian and Justin stood and quietly left the office. They didn't talk until they got to the Corvette and were on their way home.

"That was a fucking waste of time," Justin griped. "I know you two cooked something up before I got there."

"We did not. Why would you think such a thing?"

"Then tell me exactly what was said."

Brian used his photographic memory to give Justin a verbatim account of exactly what happened before Justin arrived at Frank's office.

"Is that all?" Justin asked when Brian fell silent.

Brian nodded. He was getting fucking ticked off being questioned about everything he did and said. It was like Justin didn't believe him about anything anymore.

Justin looked at Brian furtively from the corner of his eye. He could tell Brian was annoyed. The tension in the car was not pleasant.

"Are you going to make that list too?" Justin asked.

"I think Frank asked you to do it."

"He didn't specify that."

"Fine, I'll make the list too."

"Good," Justin said.

Brian could tell it was going to be a long night, and a longer two days before they saw Frank again.

Domestic Bliss

Lists

Justin glanced at his list of things that would happen if he could or couldn't forgive Brian. He sighed and wrote one more point. If he couldn't forgive Brian he would have no one to commiserate with him when he lost his job. Because he was pretty sure that was what was going to happen; he was going to lose his job.

This was the second day that the new boss Alec Bischoff had been on the job. He had seen the man everywhere scanning the office, making notes and looking disapprovingly at them all, but particularly at him. He sighed and was about to slide the list back into his bag when suddenly Alec was beside his work station.

"Is that something to do with your work?" Bischoff asked.

"Um … no, it's just a note I was writing for myself."

"And you feel that you can use company time for that purpose?"

"I was only writing for a minute at most," Justin protested.

"Any use of work time for reasons other than work is not permitted."

Justin wanted to ask this idiot if he was nuts or had just arrived from some other planet. Instead he merely said, "I'll make sure not to do that again."

"That's a fine statement, Mr. Taylor, but this is not the first time that I have seen you shirking your job."

"Shirking?" Justin was amazed that this man would make such a statement. He worked hard and was certainly not shirking.

"Yes, shirking. I have been making a list, Mr. Taylor, and according to what I have noted this is the third time I have caught you doing your own business when you should be doing the company's."

"But…"

"I expect better from you. I will meet with you Monday afternoon to discuss your work habits and your future with this company. You have until then to show me some positive things that you do that can be added to my list. Do I make myself clear?"

"Yes, Mr. Bischoff." The obsequious little man bustled away. "Shit!" Justin muttered.

"That was totally uncalled for, Justin. The man's an idiot. You're one of the hardest working people here."

"Apparently he doesn't see it that way," Justin sighed.

"Well he's wrong."

"Thanks for the support, Kyle, but I have a feeling my days here are numbered."

Kyle shook his head. "I think that sucks."

"Me too, but you better get back to work before he adds this conversation to his list of workers shirking their duty."

Kyle grimaced and went back to his table. Justin sighed again and got back to work.

When Justin walked out of Hartford Graphics he heard a horn toot and looked around. The Corvette flashed its lights down the street and Justin made his way over to the car.

"What are you doing here?" Justin asked as he climbed in.

"I knew you'd need a ride home since I dropped you off this morning."

Justin smiled. This was Brian being a good partner and today Justin really appreciated it. He leaned his head against the back of the seat and closed his eyes. He felt Brian move out of his parking space and accelerate down the street.

"You look tired," Brian said glancing over at Justin.

"I am."

"Did something happen today?"

"I got told that I have been shirking my responsibilities at work."

"Shirking?"

Justin gave a kind of strangled laugh. "That's exactly what I said when that fucking bitch Bischoff said that to me."

"He actually said that!"

"Yep. I figure my days there are quickly running out."

"That sucks."

"And not in a positive life affirming way," Justin said with a straight face. That made both of them laugh. This was one of the things he would miss if Brian and he broke up. That was what he had been writing on his list when Bischoff caught him.

"What are you going to do?" Brian asked.

"I figure I'll work as hard as I can and see what happens. Meanwhile I'll polish up my resume."

"Good boy. You know you can always use me for a reference."

Justin snorted. "For what position? Bottom boy?"

"Justin!"

"Sorry, but you really don't know anything about my work."

"Of course I do. You've helped me with graphics many times. Think about that great poster you did for the Carnival at the GLC."

"Hm."

"What?"

"I don't think potential employers are going to be very impressed when my reference is my boyfriend."

"Partner."

"Okay, partner."

"Maybe it won't come to that."

"I wish. I really like it there. Even Kyle's worried."

"Who's Kyle?"

"I work with him. He's been with the company for ten years."

"Surely they wouldn't fire him."

"I don't think so, but that doesn't stop him from worrying."

"Sounds like with this new management you might be just as well off somewhere else."

"Except that I don't really want to go somewhere else. Speaking of somewhere else, where are we? This isn't the way home."

"I figured you could use a little treat. We're going out for dinner."

"Really?" Justin asked with a smile. It would be nice not to have to cook and clean up.

"Luigi's."

"Yum, lasagna."

"I knew you'd say that," Brian smiled.

Sometimes they really did know each other so well. Justin glanced at Brian. He could see the concern on Brian's face.

"Thank you for this," Justin said softly. "It's what I needed."

"Along with a couple of bottles of wine."

"Definitely."

The following day Justin had a reasonably good day at work. He didn't have any visits from Alec Bischoff, so that made it a good day right there. He did see the little rat scurrying around behind the scenes making notes. He wondered if he was on any of those lists. He'd find out on Monday.

At lunch time he and Kyle went across the road to the deli. They sat eating their sandwiches in a booth, each of them talking about what the future might hold. Justin was pretty sure he was the one who was going to be fired.

"You know, Justin, if it is you there are lots of other graphics firms in Pittsburgh. Any of them would be lucky to have you."

"Thanks," Justin said around his mouthful of sandwich.

"I can't believe the new owners of this company put that weasel in to manage. So far I haven't seen him do anything except upset the whole staff, make everybody uncomfortable, and not bring in any new accounts."

"No new accounts?" Justin asked.

"Yeah, I was talking to Keith down in sales and he said that he has been getting no positive feedback from Bischoff at all. He seems to not want to make any deals with companies, and as a result they have lost three potential accounts. Bischoff didn't seem to care."

"You're kidding?" Justin could hardly believe his ears. "If we're losing business then I'm sure to be fired. But I don't get Bischoff's lack of concern. Isn't profit the bottom line in business?"

"You would think so, but he just doesn't seem to care."

"There's something screwy about this whole takeover," Justin said thoughtfully.

"I think so too."

"If we only knew what it was."

"If only…"

After lunch Justin worked on his project diligently. He didn't see anything of Bischoff. When he mentioned that at coffee break one of his co-workers said he had seen some handsome, well dressed man go into Bischoff's office right after lunch. He thought they had been in there ever since behind closed doors.

"Maybe he'll pull in a new account and I won't be fired," Justin sighed.

"I don't know who the guy was, but that's a long meeting."

"Curiouser and curiouser," Justin remarked.

At five Justin and Brian had their next appointment with Dr. Jamison. Justin made sure he wasn't late, meaning that he left his job fifteen minutes early. He wondered if he should, but he had come in a half hour early and had completed all his work for the day. He didn't want Brian and Frank talking about him when he wasn't there. And he hadn't seen Bischoff since he went into that mysterious meeting with the handsome stranger.

Frank ushered them into his office. He asked how they were doing and got some non-committal replies. Therefore, he decided to get right to the point.

"I sense some reluctance on both your parts today," Frank stated. Brian and Justin looked at each other, but said nothing. "So, I want to see your homework."

Each man reached into his pocket and drew out a piece of paper.

"Who would like to go first?"

Justin decided he might as well get this over with. "I will," he volunteered. He began reading his list beginning with how lonely he'd be without Brian and ending with having no one to commiserate with about losing his job.

Frank looked thoughtful at the end of Justin's remarks. "Are you worried about losing your job?"

"Yeah."

"Is that adding to the strained relations between you and Brian?"

"Probably, but I had these feelings long before there was the takeover."

"I see. Brian, what did you write down?"

"I only wrote one thing," Brian said after he cleared his throat.

"One thing?" Justin asked. "You could only think of one thing?"

Brian shrugged and Justin looked aghast that Brian could only think of one thing that would affect him whether they stayed together or not.

"Let's hear it, Brian," Frank said sensing that Brian's words were going to make an impact or would destroy everything.

Brian pulled out a piece of paper and unfolded it. He cleared his throat and took a quick glance at Justin. Justin was staring at the floor refusing to look at him. "My life will never be the same," Brian read from his paper and then refolded it.

"What does that mean?" Frank asked.

"If Justin stays and we work things out, my life will be … good. It won't be the same as it is now, but it will be good. And if Justin leaves and we can't work this out, my life will be … meaningless."

Justin's eyes came up at Brian's words and he looked into the hazel ones that he knew he still loved. "You mean that?" he asked tentatively. Brian nodded. Justin gave a wan smile, but at least it was a smile and he was no longer angry.

"Sounds like you both have a lot to think about."

They nodded. "I think we should stop there for today."

"No homework?" Justin asked.

Frank smiled. "You might want to discuss what you wrote on your lists."

"Thanks, Frank," Brian said. He placed his hand on Justin's back and guided his partner to the door.

Frank watched that intimate gesture and thought about all the couples that he had counseled, many of whom would never think to touch each other in any way, shape or form. He seriously hoped he was making headway with these two men. He wanted them to succeed.

-----

Justin looked at himself in the mirror in the bathroom. He expected that when he came home after work this day, that he would look different. He would be unemployed and he hated that idea.

He thought back to the weekend that he and Brian had had. They had talked a little when they came home from Frank's office, but mostly they had skirted the big issues. They had fucked a few times and Brian had tried to make love to him once. He could always tell the difference. Justin wondered if Brian appreciated how hard he had tried to get into it, even though he hadn't totally succeeded. It had, however, been … better.

Justin wished he knew if Brian thought the same thing. Maybe Brian thought it was just the same old, same old. If that was the case maybe they didn't have a chance of working things out.

Brian came into the bathroom. "Want a ride to work?"

"Sure," Justin said wiping the toothpaste off his face and heading into the bedroom to get his sweater.

Brian followed him looking furtively at Justin.

"What?" Justin demanded growing uncomfortable under the scrutiny. "Why are you looking at me like that?"

"You weren't supposed to notice," Brian said sucking in his lips.

"I notice a lot more than you think I do."

"So do I?"

Justin looked into Brian's eyes. Had he noticed? Had Brian really seen how hard he was trying? "What are you trying to tell me?"

"There used to be a time when I didn't have to tell you anything. You just knew."

"I guess those days are gone," Justin said before he realized how harsh it sounded.

Brian shook his head. "I've been trying to figure out how to tell you that … that … I noticed."

Justin smiled in spite of himself. "Maybe those days aren't totally gone," Justin said softly. He knew exactly what Brian meant. Brian had felt it, and he had expressed his appreciation in his usual Brian way. "I hope it made a difference."

"It did. It made clear that you want this to work. I think we can do it if we persevere."

"I'm willing if you are."

"Me too. Let's go to work."

"For the last time," Justin said sadly.

"Wait and see."

-----

Brian picked Justin up after work. He could tell by the look on his partner's face that it had not been a good day.

"What happened?" Brian asked as Justin climbed into the car.

"They let me go," Justin managed to choke out.

"Fuck!" Brian reacted as he pulled Justin into his arms. He kissed Justin's forehead and held on tight as he felt the silent sobs emanating from his lover. Finally Justin calmed down and Brian released him a bit. Justin's tear filled eyes looked into Brian's.

"It's not fair," he whispered in a barely audible voice.

"I know."

"No, you don't understand."

"What don't I understand?" Brian asked.

"He … he told me that I was incompetent."

"Incompetent?" Brian asked in disbelief. "Is that what he actually said?"

Justin nodded. "He called me into his office about ten minutes ago. He waited the whole fucking day knowing he was torturing me. He said I had been doing a lousy job, shirking my responsibilities and costing the company business. It's Bischoff that's fucking costing the company business. Everybody knows that."

"I'm going in there and kick his ass," Brian said making to get out of the car.

"No, no, don't do that. I feel stupid enough as it is. I'm never going back there."

"But…"

"No buts. Take me home, please, Brian."

Justin wanted to get away from there, from his public disgrace of being dismissed just as everybody was walking past the office. Bischoff had deliberately left the door open so that everyone could hear. It was so fucking humiliating.

Brian pulled out into traffic but he gave the front door of the company a murderous look as he drove past. It didn't take long to get home. Brian made Justin a cup of his favorite tea while Justin lay in a ball wrapped in an afghan on the couch of the family room.

As Brian handed Justin the tea, he sat down beside the boy that he knew so well, the boy who was now a man in so many ways, but still a boy in so many others.

"Are you all right?" Brian asked after swiping the hair back from Justin's forehead. It was the only form of caress and comfort that seemed right at that moment.

"I will be," Justin declared.

Brian was glad to see some of the old defiant bulldog Justin. The despair he had seen in the blue eyes outside of Hartford Graphics had really scared him. "Can I do anything else?"

"Hold me," Justin asked as he set down the cup of tea.

Brian pulled him into his arms and wrapped the afghan around both of them. He heard Justin sigh against his chest as he rubbed the boy's back. "We'll get past this," Brian whispered into his hair.

Justin heard the 'we' and that did comfort him, but it wasn't enough. "You know, almost everything Bischoff said about me is untrue."

"I know."

"I really mean it, Brian. It's all lies. Kyle has worked in the art department and he told me that I am one of the best workers they have. If Bischoff had said I was fired because of downsizing I could have handled that. I wouldn't have liked it but I could have taken it. This … this was just … lies!"

Brian thought about Justin's statement. He knew Justin was hard on himself. If he said Bischoff's accusations were false, then they were. Besides, Brian knew Justin's talent and work ethic. There was no way he would not be doing his job properly. Hell, his work would have been exemplary. Brian frowned.

After a few minutes Brian said, "How would you like some macaroni and cheese from Luigi's?"

"I'd love some, but I can't go out in this state."

"You don't have to. I'll get them to deliver."

"Luigi's doesn't deliver," Justin replied.

"They will. They owe me a favor."

Justin looked up at Brian and knew the man was doing his best to look after him, including getting him his favorite comfort food. "You think you can arrange it?"

"I know I can. Drink your tea while I order it. I'll be right back."

Brian extricated himself from the afghan and the blond and went to make his phone call. Justin pulled the wrap back around himself and snuggled into it cradling the tea in his two hands. Brian had put it in his favorite big round mug. Justin smiled in spite of his depression. Brian really did love him. He was looking after him so well, just like he had said on his list of reasons to fix things between them.

"It'll be here in twenty minutes," Brian said coming back into the room. Justin lifted the afghan and slid back up against Justin's warm body. "Are you feeling any better?"

"A little. But now I'm getting fucking angry. I hate that fucking Bischoff. I would never have been fired if Mr. Hartford was still there."

Brian kissed the top of Justin's head. He knew that was probably true. "You can't live your life on 'what if's'. You'll find a new and better job."

"You think?"

"I know," Brian said well aware that Justin needed all the reassurance that he could get at the moment.

Justin's head rested on Brian's chest and he could feel the gentle rise and fall as Brian breathed. He felt Brian's fingers massage his scalp and sift through his hair. He sighed and closed his eyes. He was almost asleep when the doorbell rang heralding the arrival of macaroni and cheese.

Brian gently shoved Justin over and covered him with the afghan. He went to answer the door. Justin looked at the cold remains of the tea in his mug. He could use some more nice, hot tea. Brian returned in a moment carrying a paper bag. He set it on the ottoman and picked up Justin's cup. Justin smiled as he realized that he was going to get the refill he had been wishing for.

It took a few minutes for the kettle to boil and then Brian returned with a steaming mug of tea and a fork.

Justin gave out a little laugh.

"What?" Brian asked.

Justin nodded at the fork. "You're going to let me eat macaroni and cheese in here?" he asked.

"No."

Justin's face fell. "Then what's the fork for."

"I'm going to feed you," Brian said matter-of-factly.

Justin almost choked on his sip of tea. It was hot and sweet, but he couldn't believe Brian's words.

Brian nudged him over and sat down beside him. He took the foil dish containing the macaroni out of the bag. He carefully loaded the fork and brought it to Justin's lips. "Open up," Brian whispered.

Justin opened his mouth and accepted the food. "Yummy," he smiled as he chewed the creamy, cheesy mixture.

Brian continued to feed him mouthfuls of food watching Justin's lips and tongue the whole time. He was getting hard from the sensuous effect of watching his lover eat. After many mouthfuls Justin grabbed Brian's wrist and directed the food into Brian's mouth. Brian balked a bit but finally ate it knowing that it tasted delicious. At that point he didn't want to refuse Justin anything. Justin took the fork and fed Brian a few forkfuls. Taking one for himself, Justin leaned in and kissed Brian licking cheese from Brian's lips and depositing some of his own food into his lover's mouth. He heard Brian moan.

"You know what," Justin said. "I'm not going to worry about Bischoff anymore. Fuck him and his lists!"

"No, fuck me."

The next thing they knew the macaroni dish was on the floor along with the afghan and their clothes. As they rocked together Brian could feel that they were almost there, almost back to what they had had before and then Justin shut down. Their orgasms were almost upon them and they came to completion, but that last intimate bond wasn't shared once again.

"Almost," Brian whispered as he regained his breath.

Justin smiled up at him. "Maybe we can make it next time." Brian caressed Justin's cheek and drew out. He hoped that would be the case. This had been better but it just wasn't good enough.

Domestic Bliss

The Wrath of Kinney

"Theodore? Get your ass over here." Brian hung up immediately. He knew Ted would heed his call.

Fifteen minutes later Ted appeared in Brian's doorway. "You bellowed?"

"Close the door and sit down," Brian ordered.

"Uh oh," Ted muttered. He wondered what he had done to bring down the wrath of Kinney upon him.

"Have you ever heard of a company called JB3 Industries?" Brian asked getting right to the point.

Ted thought for a moment. "Don't think so. It doesn't ring any bells."

"Find out who they are."

"What do they do?"

"Their latest acquisition was Hartford Graphics. I don't know what else they own."

"Are they a new client?"

"Fuck no!"

"Then, why the interest, if I may ask?"

Brian sighed. He ran his fingers through his hair. "Justin's new job was with Hartford Graphics before it was taken over about a week ago."

"And you want to check out who his boss is? How sweet," Ted grinned.

"Fuck off, Ted. Justin was fired on Friday."

"Fired? Friday? But he's such a good artist."

"I fucking know that. There's something screwy about this whole takeover and everything that has happened since."

"I see. You want to know who owns JB3 Industries and why they fired Justin."

"Justin says he was doing a good job there. There was no reason to fire him."

"I know Justin would do a good job. Anything he's ever done has been excellent," Ted stated.

"Thanks for that, Theodore. I'll tell him you said so. But you can see why he was so confused when they accused him of incompetence and shirking."

"Shirking?"

Brian had to chuckle. That seemed to be everybody's reaction to Justin having been told just that by the asshole Bischoff. "That's the word."

"Holy shit! Are they blind?"

"I think there's something a little more sinister than that going on. The new manager is one Alec Bischoff. See what you can find out about him too."

"Will do, Brian. I'll start on the internet. I should have something for you before close of business."

"Good," Brian said in a distracted manner. He had a bad feeling deep in his gut about this one.

Picking up the phone, Brian dialed his home.

"Hello," Justin answered.

"Got those resumes mailed yet?"

Justin giggled. "I've only been unemployed for the weekend. Give me a break."

"No way! I expect you to keep me in the manner to which I have become accustomed."

"Certainly, your highness."

"Do I detect sarcasm?"

"Maybe just a tad," Justin admitted.

"Have you been painting?"

"How did you know?"

"I could smell the paint fumes over the phone."

"Briiaan!"

"You always paint when you're dealing with difficult or emotional situations."

That statement stopped Justin dead in his tracks. He thought back to the bad times. With the exception of the bashing where he couldn't control his hand, he did paint or sketch as a way to release what he was feeling. The painting he had been working on in his studio was dark and ominous and sad, just the way he felt.

"How do you know that?" Justin asked.

"I'm pretty observant."

"You are, are you?"

"Are you okay?" Brian asked after a short pause.

"Ah, the real reason for your call."

"I worry."

"I'll be fine. Go back to work."

"Yes, sir," Brian smirked but he cut the connection and did just that.

Brian, however, found it difficult to concentrate on his work. He was constantly thinking about Justin and the situation they were in. He wondered when Ted would get back to him. He worried that Justin's dark mood combined with their "marital" troubles might lead to depression. There were too many things to think about. When had his life become so complicated? He knew the answer to that was the night he met Justin Taylor, but he also knew that he wouldn't have it any other way.

As he was packing up for the day there was a knock on his door. Brian called, "Enter."

Ted came in carrying a sheaf of papers. "I finally found out who owns JB3 Industries," he said proudly. "It took a lot of digging. I bet you can never guess."

"Trip Bedford," Brian said softly.

"What? How the fuck? If you already knew, why didn't you tell me?"

"I wanted it confirmed before I said anything."

"How did you figure it out?" Ted asked. "He hid his trail really well."

"I bet he did. Trip's real name is the same as his father's, Jerome Bedford. He's call Trip because he's the third generation to carry that name. Hence, JB3 Industries."

Ted shook his head and smiled. "You're absolutely right."

"Did you find out anything about this Bischoff asshole?"

"Not much. He's never had a management position in a graphics firm before."

Brian snorted. "I'm not surprised."

"He has worked in other companies, but he has no credentials for the position he was given at Hartford Graphics."

"So, basically he's the flunkie while Trip calls the shots."

"That would be my guess."

"Fuck! What is the matter with that man? I thought we were friends."

"Or lovers?" Ted asked avoiding Brian's eyes.

"I have to do something about this."

"What can you do? He bought the company for an exorbitant price. But that's his prerogative. He can name whomever he wants as manager. What can you do about it?"

"I don't know … yet. Look, Ted, thanks for the information. And this stays between us." Ted nodded as he went out the door.

-----

A couple of days later Cynthia buzzed Brian to tell him that he had a visitor. Brian smiled to himself. He knew his phone call would produce this result.

"Send him in," Brian said.

A few seconds later an elated looking Trip Bedford stepped through the doorway of Brian's office. "I'm so happy you called, Brian. I've wanted to see you again ever since that day…" Trip let his voice trail off not wanting to put into words what had happened between them.

"Have a seat," Brian said flatly.

Trip looked at Brian perhaps expecting a hug or a kiss, since Brian had been the one to call and request this meeting. He sat down looking expectantly at Brian. When nothing was forthcoming Trip said, "So, you wanted to see me?"

"How have things been with you, Trip?"

Trip smiled. That was better. Brian was interested in what he was doing and how he was doing. Maybe all was forgiven. "I've been good."

"And how's business?" Brian asked pointedly.

"Business is great, but surely you didn't call me here from Indianapolis to renew my account."

"The last time I saw you I think I told you to take your business and shove it," Brian smirked.

"But you didn't really mean that, did you?"

"Why would you say that?" Brian asked staring at Trip.

Trip shifted uncomfortably under the gaze. "Well, you called me here today and we've always been … friends."

"Have we?"

Trip frowned. This wasn't going the way he had expected when he had agreed to come to Pittsburgh at Brian's summoning. He had hoped they were going to mend fences and be together again now that that blond kid was out of the picture, at least out of work. Trip smiled at the thought. He was the equal of Brian and now Brian would have seen that, since Justin couldn't even hold onto his menial job.

Trip wanted to get to the point of this visit. "Brian, what's going on? Just why did you ask me to come here?"

"So you could apologize."

"Apologize? For what? I know when we fucked; you probably blamed me for that. But I'm not going to apologize. There was nothing to be sorry for."

Brian felt the steam rise in his head. "Probably blamed you?" Brian demanded. He did fucking blame Trip and he had told him so. But he blamed himself more.

"Let's leave the past in the past and move on," Trip said seeing how the memory had stirred something unpleasant in Brian. It only held fond, no, hot memories for him.

"Some things from the past just keep shoving their unwanted heads into the present."

"What does that mean?"

"I think you know."

Trip felt himself unable to look at Brian. Did Brian know what he had done? He had a sinking feeling deep inside. And then he was afraid. Brian would destroy him if he ever found out. But he couldn't have found out. He had covered his tracks very carefully.

The silence hung between them like a huge weight ready to crush everything beneath it. Then Brian moved. He picked up a file from his desk and practically threw it at Trip. Trip grabbed it and felt his heart die as he saw JB3 Industries clearly printed across the front of the file.

"Brian," Trip said but it came out as little more than a whimper.

"I know what you did, and it's just about the most despicable thing I've ever seen."

"What … what do you mean?"

"YOU are JB3 Industries. YOU bought Hartford Graphics. YOU had Justin fired. YOU tried to make him feel like shit."

"Brian…"

"Don't say my name. It makes me sick to my stomach to hear it come out of your mouth."

Trip pulled himself together slightly and sat taller in his chair. "Brian, I have to protest these accusations. I have little to do with the day to day running of any companies that I might own."

"I never knew you were such a good liar," Brian said staring at Trip. "Your father would be so proud."

Trip felt the dagger pierce his heart. "Don't mention my father," he hissed. He knew his father would be so ashamed of what he had done.

"I'll mention whatever the fuck I want!"

"Brian, please…"

"Trip, I did think at one time we were friends, and maybe if what happened after your father's funeral hadn't happened…"

"I don't regret anything that happened," Trip said defiantly. He would not let Brian sully what they had shared together.

"Well, I regret ever meeting you, and this comes from the man who doesn't do regrets." Brian shook his head. He saw Trip wince. Maybe there still was a conscience in there somewhere. "Trip, I want you to apologize to Justin."

"Are you fucking nuts?"

"No, I'm completely sane, and if you were too, you'd see that this whole thing is crazy. You have to put an end to it."

"Then come be with me," Trip ventured.

"I love Justin."

"No, you love me."

"How many times and in how many ways do I have to tell you that that is not the case. I love Justin. That's who I want to be with."

"He's just a boy. He can't stick with you. How many times has he left you? I'm the man you need."

"If you don't stop saying fucking shit like that, I'm going to come around this desk and beat the fucking crap out of you."

Trip visually recoiled at Brian's words. He had never heard Brian talk like that before. "I think it's time for me to leave," Trip said standing up. Clearly there was no reasoning with Brian. Trip had been brought there under false pretenses. He needed to get out of there as fast as he could.

"You're not going anywhere," Brian stated and he moved to stand between Trip and the door out of the office.

"You can't seriously be threatening me," Trip scoffed although he could hear the little vibration of fear in his voice.

"I'm going to do whatever it takes to put an end to this once and for all."

"How can it end," Trip moaned slumping back into his chair. "I love you."

"You don't love me. You don't even know what love is. Justin would never do something like this that would hurt me so much."

"Hurt you?" Trip asked bewildered. "I'd never hurt you, Brian."

"What hurts Justin hurts me."

"No," Trip tried to deny Brian's words, but he merely sounded defeated.

"Your father would not want this, Trip," Brian tried again. "He was a good man and he raised you better than this."

"Raised me to be alone," Trip mumbled.

"You don't have to be alone. You need therapy. You're a great looking guy and you have so much going for you…"

"Then why don't you want me?" Trip asked the tears evident in his voice.

"If I hadn't met Justin, I might have … wanted you. But that's not the case. I did meet Justin and I love him. Not you!"

Trip's head dropped down and he cradled it in his hands his elbows resting on his knees. The sobs that shook his body could not be disguised so easily.

"Trip," Brian said softly venturing around the desk and within reach of the devastated man. "It's not too late to make this right."

"I …I can't," Trip gulped. "I love you."

"You think you do, but I don't love you. That makes all the difference. When that's the case, it's not love; it's obsession."

"Obsession," Trip repeated wiping at his eyes.

Brian went to the conference table and poured Trip a glass of water. He brought it back and handed it to the man. "Drink this."

Trip swallowed some water and looked up at Brian. He knew that everything Brian had said was true, but he just couldn't let go of the dream of him and Brian being together. "Don't you have anything stronger?" he asked trying to get control of his emotions.

"That's not what you need at the moment."

"I suppose you're going to tell me what I need," Trip said.

"I already have. You need treatment. Justin and I are seeing a psychologist, Dr. Frank Jamison. I would recommend that you see him too, or somebody else back in Indianapolis."

"You're seeing a psychologist … with Justin?"

"Don't get your hopes up that things aren't good between Justin and me," Brian lied. He didn't want Trip thinking that he had an opening. "We've seen Frank before, and we go back … periodically."

"You do?"

Brian could see the look Trip was giving him. He knew he should never have mentioned that he and Justin were seeing a psychologist. "Look! The point I'm trying to make is that Frank has been able to help us sort things out. Someone like that could do the same for you."

"I guess I could see … Frank."

"It doesn't have to be Frank," Brian said hurriedly.

"It doesn't matter," Trip replied. "Is that all I have to do to make things right between us?"

"No, I told you before you have to tell Justin what you did and apologize."

"I don't think I could do that."

"Then I hope you rot in Hell," Brian stated emphatically.

"Brian…"

"You heard the terms. What's it going to be?"

"If I apologize, where does that leave us?"

"I won't hate you like I do at this moment."

Trip shuddered. The thought that Brian hated him made him physically ill. "You don't hate me, do you?" His voice was barely a whisper.

"With all my heart and soul."

"I … I'm sorry," Trip managed to get out.

"It's not me that you need to apologize to."

"I … I guess I should try to talk to Justin."

"Let's go."

"Go where?"

"Justin's at home. You can tell him how sorry you are right now."

"Now? I don't know. I … need to think this through."

"If you intend to apologize, then it shouldn't matter if it's now or later."

"I … I suppose."

"Let's go.

Reluctantly Trip stood up and followed Brian out to his car.

"Do you have a rental car?" Brian asked.

"No, I took a cab from the airport."

"Get in."

The ride to Brian's home was mostly in silence. Trip tried a couple of times to make nice with Brian, but Brian cut him off, telling him he should be thinking about what he was going to say to Justin. As they approached the house, Trip had decided exactly what he was going to say.

Brian opened the front door and called out for Justin. Trip followed Brian into the house. They found Justin sketching in the family room.

"Hey," Brian said.

"Hey," Justin smiled up at his partner until movement behind Brian caught his eye. His face changed immediately to one of disbelief and horror. "What the fuck is he doing here?"

"He has something to say to you," Brian replied looking knowingly at Trip.

"Get him out of here. I don't want him in our home."

"Not until you hear this," Brian said firmly.

"If he won't leave, I will," Justin said standing up.

"Wait, Justin," Trip said raising his hand to keep Justin in the room. "I need to say this."

"Say what?" Justin asked.

"I need to say that I love Brian and I want to be with him and he wants to be with me." Trip blurted it all out before he could think or regret his words.

"You fucking son of a bitch!" Brian reacted as his fist connected with Trip's face. I should fucking kill you!" Brian grabbed Trip by the lapels of his jacket and bodily hauled him to the front door of the house. He yanked the door open and planting his foot firmly in Trip's backside he pushed with all his might. Trip went flying down the driveway until he lost his footing and lay sprawled on the front lawn. "Too bad it isn't garbage day so they could pick up the trash!" Brian yelled at him. "If you aren't off our property in the next three minutes, I'm calling the police." Brian slammed the door.

Quickly he returned to the family room where he found Justin huddled on the couch.

"Are you all right? I brought him here to apologize to you. He said he would."

"Apologize to me for what?" Justin asked. "You didn't fuck him again, did you?"

Brian kneeled by the couch. "Justin, I'll never touch Trip Bedford again. I already promised you that. Trip owns JB3 Industries. He bought out the Hartford Company and had you fired. I found out a couple of days ago, and I wanted him to tell you. I wanted him to apologize, to grovel, for all the damage he's done to us, to you."

"So why did he say what he did?"

"Because he's a fucking asshole and he thought he could hurt you."

"He did hurt me. I almost believed him."

"Almost?"

"Until I saw the look on your face."

"What look?"

"It was murderous. I've never seen you look like that even when you were very, very angry. It was … scary."

"I didn't mean to scare you," Brian said softly. He realized just how out of control he had been.

"I did enjoy seeing you lift Trip off the floor by his lapels. You have superhuman strength when you're angry."

Brian smirked. "I am Rage."

"My hero."

"You mean that?" Brian asked with a frown.

"I do," Justin cooed running his fingers down Brian's cheek. "You saved our home from the evil villain."

"I shouldn't have brought him here."

"It's okay. I did enjoy the ending of this comic book adventure."

"You should have seen him flying down the driveway when I kicked his ass."

"You did?" Justin chuckled. "I can see that in the next issue of Rage."

"You're not mad at me for bringing him here?"

"I was, but I'm not now."

Brian let out a sigh of relief.

"In fact," Justin said. "This Trip incident has had a surprising effect on my lips."

"On your lips?"

"They're craving a great kiss. Do you know where I could get one of those?"

Brian knew an invitation when he heard one. And he wasn't about to pass this one up. He pulled Justin toward him and gave him his best toe curling kiss. That was followed by another and another. Finally he pulled back to look into the dark, lust filled eyes of his partner.

"Let's go to bed," Brian said gently as he pulled Justin to his feet.

On the way to their bedroom they shed pieces of clothing so that by the time they stood beside their bed they were naked. Brian ran his hands up and down Justin's arms.

"We're all right, aren't we?" Brian asked. He was referring to what had just happened.

"I think we're more than all right," Justin replied. He was referring to the declaration that Brian had made by kicking Trip Bedford's ass. It was so much more than the simple act of the kick. It proved to Justin what each of them, both he and Trip, meant to Brian.

Brian shoved Justin back onto their bed and covered his body with his own. He nibbled at Justin's neck and collarbone, and then kissed his way down to Justin's straining cock. With a swipe of his tongue through the slit he collected the precum bubbling there. His next kiss let Justin taste himself.

Justin reached into the nightstand and handed Brian a condom and lube.

"It won't be much longer and we won't have to use these anymore," Brian whispered.

"I know, but it's okay for now."

Brian rolled on the condom and lubed up. He squirted some lube into Justin's hole before he lifted Justin's legs onto his shoulders. Gently he pushed in until he was home, safe and warm and where he wanted to be. He began his rhythm and felt Justin respond in kind. With a smile he leaned forward and kissed Justin's full lips.

"I love you," Brian said as he began to speed up the pace. They were coming to the end of the ride. Brian wondered if Justin would pull back like he had every time lately. With a final few thrusts and a couple of tugs on Justin's throbbing dick, they were both coming. It was explosive and satisfying and complete.

"Yes," Brian groaned as he rolled away.

"You felt it?"

"The difference?"

"Yeah."

"We're back. You're back. It was the way it should be."

Justin looked into the hazel eyes and nodded. They had found each other again.

Domestic Bliss

Fresh Starts

Justin carried his book and a glass of iced tea out to the patio and started to shove the chaise out into the sun. It wasn't very sunny, but he decided he wanted some rays. He wouldn't stay long enough to get burnt, but he was depressed and maybe the pale sunlight would refresh his body. The front leg of the chaise caught on something and stopped its forward movement rather abruptly. Justin felt his book slide out of his hand and the tea sloshed all over his arm and down onto the book at his feet.

"Fuck!" he said loudly. This was just another miserable event in the fucked up last few weeks, culminating with him being fired from his graphics job.

"Justin, is that you?" a voice said from the other side of the hedge.

"Yeah, it's me, Gwen."

"Are you all right? I heard you call out."

"If you don't count inherent clumsiness, I guess I'm fine."

Gwen walked around the hedge and surveyed the sodden book and Justin trying to shake the iced tea off his arm and hand. "Let me get you a towel," she said heading for the kitchen.

"Next to the sink," Justin called after her.

Gwen returned with a towel that she had found and helped Justin clean himself and his poor wet book. They sopped up the spot of tea that had landed on the chaise cushion as well. When they were done, Justin let out a long sigh.

"Is something wrong, Justin?" Gwen asked. "It's not like you to get so upset about some spilled milk … or tea as the case may be."

"It's not just the tea. The last week has been the shits. Pardon my French."

"Want to talk about it?"

Justin looked at her thoughtfully. It might do him good to talk to someone about what was bothering him. "Would you like some iced tea? I have a pitcher in the fridge," he offered.

She nodded and he went inside to get it. While he was gone she pushed Justin's chaise into the sun and pulled the other one up beside it. "I thought we could sit in the sun for a bit," she said when he returned with the glasses of tea.

"Thanks, that's what I was trying to do when I made such a mess."

"It wasn't much of a mess. You should see some of mine."

Justin chuckled and so did she. It felt good to do that.

"Thanks for making me laugh. I needed it."

"What's wrong? Speaking of which, why are you home on a workday."

"It's not a workday for me," Justin said letting his words hang in the air. She looked at him funny. "I got fired."

"Fired? No!"

"Yep, a few days ago."

"Were they downsizing?"

"I wish. They called me incompetent and sent me packing."

"I can't believe that, Justin. I'm so sorry."

"That's just the beginning of the saga," Justin said shaking his head.

"What do you mean?"

Justin sighed. He wasn't sure how much he wanted to tell Gwen, or anybody, for that matter. "Let's just say that there was some unpleasant behind the scenes activities."

Gwen's eyebrows went up. "You mean they terminated you unjustly?"

"Kind of."

"Then sue!"

"Sue?" Justin had never even thought about anything like that, but he had to admit that the idea of making Trip Bedford pay financially for what he had done would be very satisfying. Gwen watched his reaction. Justin decided that it might be better just to let this go and not explain any further.

"It's something to think about," she said gently.

"Yeah, but I don't know…"

"Well, on a more pleasant note, I think you should do something to get you out of the house."

"I should, should I?" Justin laughed. Gwen was making him feel better.

"Definitely. I have two tickets to the Pittsburgh Philharmonic for Friday night. What do you say?"

"You want me to come with you?"

"I believe that's what I said. Marc really doesn't like classical music, but I usually force him to come with me. But … this Friday he's playing in a golf tournament, and they have this big dinner afterwards. So how about it?"

"It sounds like a nice night out. I'll go if you let me take you to dinner first."

"I thought you just lost your job," Gwen laughed.

"I didn't say we'd go to Pappaganos," Justin chided her. "I think I can afford a passable restaurant though."

"Deal," Gwen said holding out her hand for Justin to shake.

"Oh, I need to run it by Brian, but I don't see that it should be a problem."

"Good, then I guess I should go start the chicken I was going to have for dinner." Gwen stood up and carried her empty iced tea glass towards the kitchen. "I'll leave this on the counter."

"Thanks for everything, Gwen. I do feel better."

"My pleasure, sweetie," she said as she disappeared around the hedge.

-----

"God damn fucking, Vance," Brian muttered loud enough for anyone in the house to hear. He slammed the front door behind him and dropped his metal briefcase with a loud clang on the hardwood floor.

"And a hearty welcome home to you, partner," Justin said daring to stick his head out of the kitchen.

Brian muttered something unintelligible and headed upstairs to change his clothes.

Justin debated if he should follow, but decided that he would do better waiting for Brian to come back down. Over the years he had learned that pressing Brian made him clam up. He would explain what was wrong when he was ready. Justin went back into the kitchen to work on dinner.

After about twenty minutes there was still no sign of Brian. Justin turned dinner off and stuck what he could in the oven. Reluctantly he made his way upstairs. Surprisingly there was no sign of Brian in the bedroom or the bathroom. He checked Gus' room only to find it empty. With a frown he walked back into the bedroom and over to the doorway to his studio, the little room with the big window, just off their bedroom.

In front of the window stood Brian. He wore his old worn jeans that fit in all the right places and a T-shirt that showed all the ripples of his chest.

"Brian?" Justin said softly.

Brian didn't turn around or acknowledge his presence, but Justin knew he was aware that he was there. He waited.

After several minutes Justin needed to break the silence. "What are you looking at, Brian?"

There was continued silence. Finally Brian said barely above a whisper, "A squirrel."

Justin frowned. It wasn't like Brian to notice nature, and even less like him to comment on it. "A squirrel?" Justin's mind was racing. Something was very wrong.

"They have such cute tails when the bounce across the lawn. They're fluffy and perky."

"Brian, are you sick?" Justin was really worried now. Cute and perky and fluffy! Not in Brian Kinney's vocabulary.

"No, not sick."

Justin let out a long breath. "Then what's going on?"

"Have you ever noticed how industrious the squirrels are? They work and work building their stores for the long winter ahead. They never question what they're doing."

"Brian…?"

"Fucking Vance told me today that my contract runs out in a few months and he will have to re-evaluate taking me back on, and whether my salary will be the same."

"Is he fucking insane? You bring in more business than any three other ad execs he's got, and at least double what he does himself."

"I know," Brian said with a little grin. It was nice to hear Justin defend him, and the kid knew what he was talking about.

"Tell him to go fuck himself," Justin declared.

Finally Brian turned and looked at Justin. There was something in his eyes, something that Justin couldn't quite pinpoint.

"I've been thinking about doing just that."

"Wha … what are you saying?"

"I think it's time that I left Vangard and that fucking hypocrite Vance behind."

"But what will you do? Is there another ad agency interested?"

"Probably, but that's not what I want." The little smile on Brian's face began to expand and it lit up the small room almost like people had told Justin that his smile did. Justin stared at his partner not knowing what to say. He felt happy for Brian because the man so obviously was pleased about this idea. But … there was a small gnawing cramp deep in his stomach. He knew it was fear.

Justin swallowed hard and then had to speak. "Brian, do you think this is the right time to be contemplating going out on your own?" He tried to keep his voice even and not let his emotions show.

"I think it's the perfect time, Sunshine."

"But … I don't have a job and starting a new business is pretty iffy…"

"No faith in me?"

"Of course I have faith in you, Brian. But … it's not long ago that we got this house. And I know you paid more for it than you wanted to. How are you going to finance a new business?"

"That's what I was thinking about while I was watching the squirrel," Brian said looking out the window again.

"And what did the squirrel tell you?"

"He told me that hard work and perseverance is what I need."

"You certainly have that," Justin said venturing to step inside the room. As soon as he made the first step, Brian's arms opened up to enfold him. "Are you sure?" Justin whispered into Brian's chest.

"Fuck no!" Justin looked up into Brian's eyes. "But I want to do this. If I don't do it soon, I never will. And I don't want to be stuck at Vangard for the rest of my life."

Justin drew in a deep breath. "Then let's go eat dinner before it's ruined … and we can talk about how we're going to pull this off."

Brian slung his arm over Justin's shoulder and kissed his cheek. "How we're going to pull this off," he repeated against Justin's ear as they headed back downstairs.

-----

Dinner was almost over. They had actually done a lot more talking than eating. Brian was just full of ideas about what he wanted his new company to be like. Justin had some ideas about how he could help. He was already thinking about possible names for Brian's new company. He had some ideas of what the new offices should look like too. He wanted them to reflect Brian but also be warm and inviting.

Then a thought occurred to Justin. "Can Vance stop you from starting a business?" Justin asked.

"What do you mean … stop me?" Brian asked with a frown.

"Aren't there rules about not starting a competing business, or stuff like that?"

"Where did you hear about that?"

"At Hartford we had to sign something about not freelancing for other graphic companies that were in competition with Hartford."

"I don't see how that could apply to me. If Vance is letting my contract run out, then any stipulations in it should also run out."

"Maybe you should get Mel to look it over for you. Just in case," Justin suggested.

"That might not be a bad idea," Brian said thoughtfully.

"You know," Brian said staring into Justin's eyes, "I think I need to go to bed."

"Why? Too much excitement for one day?" Justin asked innocently.

"No, not enough."

"Huh? OH! Right," Justin mumbled finally getting the point.

"Think you might join me? We could both find some excitement," Brian said with a waggle of his eyebrows.

Justin giggled. He sounded like a teenager and that was the way he felt at the moment. Even if he had lost his job and had to face Trip Bedford, he suddenly felt good about things. It was nice to see Brian so energized by the idea of starting his own company. Maybe this was the beginning of good things for both of them.

"I should clean up this mess," Justin said waving his hand at the kitchen.

"Why? It'll still be there in the morning."

"You mean if I let you take me to bed, we won't be getting up again until tomorrow."

Brian nodded. "Precisely."

"Then I better get a snack," Justin chuckled as he stood up.

Brian grabbed him and pulled him onto his lap. "I'll feed you a high protein snack at midnight. How's that?"

"Sounds like a win/win situation to me," Justin laughed. He leaned in and kissed Brian allowing his lips and tongue and breath to tell Brian how happy he was at that moment. It felt good to work on something together, to act like a couple, and help each other.

"Let's go," Brian said as he stood Justin on his feet and they made their way upstairs.

They slowly undressed each other, feeling no need to hurry. Brian tugged Justin's hand as he led his lover to the walk-through shower. He started the water and pulled Justin into a long, slow kiss that had them both hard before it finished.

"You have the most ambidextrous tongue," Justin cooed when Brian's mouth released his.

"How can a tongue be ambidextrous?"

"I don't know, but yours is."

"You're so … juvenile," Brian laughed.

"Hey, don't insult me."

"I meant it in only the very best way."

"Okay then." Justin launched himself at Brian leaping up to wrap his legs around Brian's hips. He felt their hard ons collide and let out a little gasp. "I love you," he whispered before Brian could capture his mouth once again. Finally when neither of them could stand to be separate any longer, Brian set Justin down and turned him around.

Soapy fingers probed and opened. Hard cocks leaked and ached. Needy mouths kissed and caressed. Hungry hands squeezed and kneaded. And then they were locked together as only they knew how. Brian drove into his lover filling him and finding that warm, safe harbor for his desires and his love.

As Brian pounded into Justin the younger man knew that this was the start of something special. They both had big changes in store for them. Justin would have to find another job and Brian would open his own business. Nothing stayed the same forever, but that was what made life so exciting.

"Brian," Justin moaned as Brian hit his sweet spot.

"I know, Sunshine. I know," Brian whispered against Justin's ear. "I love you too."

And then they were coming, quivering and shaking as their orgasms shot through them, locking them together for those exquisite moments before the laws of gravity made them separate.

Justin turned and leaned against the wall of the shower feeling the warm water rinse over him. He pulled Brian against his body and felt Brian's weight lean on him. This was the way it was supposed to be. These were the feelings that they had been missing since the whole Trip Bedford fiasco. It was a fresh start in that department too.

"Take me to our bed, Brian. I want to make love to you all night long." Justin's voice was husky with emotion.

Brian pulled back a little bit and looked into Justin's eyes. He could see the emotion there, and knew that it mirrored his own feelings. "We can do this together. We can do anything as long as we're together."

"I know," Justin said with a small smile which was obliterated when Brian's lips covered his own in another scorching kiss.

Brian led them out of the shower where they dried each other off softly and gently, touching and feeling and reacquainting themselves with all the lovely places on their bodies that made them feel alive. They kissed and caressed their way back to their bed where they made love long and slow.

When they were finished Justin lay cradled in Brian's arms. "I feel great," Justin whispered as Brian held him close.

"Me too," Brian whispered. "I used to hate this part. I never knew what to say, never wanted to say anything. And yet, when we were having problems this is what I missed the most. You used to roll away and fall asleep."

"I'm sorry," Justin said softly.

"Don't be sorry. That was how you coped. I was the one who screwed up … big time."

"But it's over and we're okay."

"Thank the gods."

"I have quite a bit to be thankful for, and hopefully … much more to come in the future. I see nothing but good things ahead for us."

"What … are you psychic now?" Brian teased.

"I've always been psychic where you're concerned."

"You think so, huh?" Brian asked.

"Yep," Justin smirked.

"Then what am I thinking right now?"

"Hm, let's see. You're thinking what a great fuck I am and how you love to hear me laugh and how attractive my ass is and how much you want it again. How'd I do?" Justin asked batting his baby blues.

"Hrmph," Brian reacted. "I always think about your ass. There's nothing psychic about that!"

Justin giggled. "Okay, let me try again." Justin stared into Brian's eyes and looked thoughtful. "You're thinking about your new business. I have to say I'm insulted. After fantastic sex, you think about that instead of me." Justin pretend pouted.

"I just told you that I always think about your ass and the incredible things I can do with it and to it." Brian smirked at his partner. "However, my brain is capable of multi-tasking."

"No shit!" Justin chuckled. "I guess that goes right along with your ambidextrous tongue."

"Twat," Brian laughed kissing Justin's forehead. "What else am I thinking?"

"Hm, you're thinking that you need a good name for your company, and what accounts you might try to win in order to get started."

Brian raised an eyebrow. "Not bad, Svengali."

"See, I told you I'm onto you."

"Don't get too cocky."

"You love my cock too."

"Not as much as you love mine," Brian said tongue in cheek.

"Well, I'll give you that one."

"So, anything else I'm thinking about?"

Justin stared into Brian's eyes and held his breath. "Um … were you by any chance wondering if maybe I would help you with the art work in your new ad company?" Justin waited breathlessly to hear what Brian would say. This would be the ultimate if he and Brian could work together and take the advertising world by storm.

"Wrong!" Brian said emphatically.

"Oh," Justin said his heart sinking. Obviously Brian wasn't thinking along the same lines he was. Brian probably wanted the top graphic artist in Pittsburgh, not some newbie who had just been fired.

Brian watched the emotions flit across Justin's face. He decided he had to put him out of his misery. "I don't want you to help me with the art work…" Brian paused.

"Okay, I get the point. I don't measure up to your exalted standards. You don't have to rub it in." Justin crossed his arms on his chest and glared at the opposite wall.

"If you'll let me finish…"

"Go right ahead. I already know what you're going to say. I'm not experienced enough. You want the best for your new company, just like you're the best at what you do. I'm just some kid who got fired from my job."

"Are you done?" Brian asked when Justin stopped to take a breath. Justin shrugged and pouted some more. "You're right that you don't have the amount of experience that I would like for my art department, but you have something better."

Justin looked up. "I do?"

"You are the most creative and imaginative artist I know."

"I am?" Justin's smile obliterated the pout.

"You are. And that's why I don't want you to help with the art work."

"Oh," Justin said as a light dawned. "You think I should be painting or creating real art, not doing ads."

"Hey, watch it. Ads can be real art in the hands of a master."

"I guess," Justin admitted even though he didn't really believe that. "I suppose I could work on some paintings while I look for a new job. Being an artist doesn't really pay until you're well known."

"I know that, but I really think your psychic powers have failed you this time," Brian smirked.

"How so?"

"I gave you as many clues as I could."

"What the fuck are you talking about?"

"I don't want you to help with the art work at my new company, I want you to be the art department at least until I get on my feet."

"Are you kidding?" Justin asked eyeing Brian warily. Did he really mean it?

"Would I kid you about something this important?" Brian asked innocently.

"That's exactly what you've been doing for the last five minutes … if what you just said is true."

"It's true," Brian said with a little smile. "I was yanking your chain. You nailed it in your third psychic guess."

"You mean it?" Justin asked his face ablaze with a dazzling smile.

"I mean every word … that is, if you want to do it."

"Oh, I want to do it," Justin said rolling on top of Brian. "I can see us working together, making our fortunes, turning the advertising world on its ear."

"Are these more psychic predictions?" Brian laughed as Justin tried to tickle him.

"Uh huh," Justin smiled as Brian's hands roamed over his ass kneading and squeezing. "I see your attention has turned back to the really important stuff," Justin noted with a smirk of his own.

"I told you I was always thinking about your ass. But I'm also multi-tasking."

"Deciding on my new title?" Justin chuckled.

Brian gave him a look and made the sign of the cross to ward off evil. "You're spooky sometimes."

"So what will it be?"

"Let's see, Chief ASSistant to the CEO?"

"It will not! I'm not anybody's assistant," Justin said defiantly. "Not even yours."

Brian raised the eyebrow again. "Okay, then what about Head of Hard and Deep Operations?"

"You are so bad! I want a good title," Justin declared rubbing his abdomen against Brian's and feeling their cocks come back to life.

"Then Head of the Art Department! How's that?"

"Hey, I like it," Justin grinned.

"Of course, you will be the complete art department, but we can still call you the head."

"You're not just saying that so you can fuck me, are you, big guy?"

"Most certainly," Brian smirked.

"Asshole!" Justin griped as he gave Brian's nipple a none too gentle tweak.

"Ow! I may have to demote you," Brian threatened with a mock glare. But Justin felt Brian's dick get even harder and knew that he would never be demoted in any way, shape or form.

"Why don't you fuck me instead?" Justin said latching his mouth onto Brian's wounded nipple.

"Anything to keep the employee happy!"

Domestic Bliss

New and Old

Brian contacted Justin's mother and told her that he was looking for some space for his new ad agency. She agreed to draw up a list of potential office space and get back to him. They had gone and looked at four or five places but none of them were what Brian wanted. He wasn't interested in the traditional highrise office space in downtown Pittsburgh. He wanted his business to be unique and the office space needed to say that. Jenn set about drawing up another list of not so usual business spaces.

Friday afternoon Justin was changing his clothes when he heard a car pull into the driveway. A few seconds later the front door opened.

"Brian?" Justin called.

"Yeah, it's me."

"What are you doing home so early?"

"I've had it. Vance was being a complete ass today."

Justin came down the stairs wearing his slacks and sports jacket over a sky blue pullover sweater.

"You look good enough to eat," Brian said pulling him into his arms for a heated kiss. Brian's hands wandered to Justin's crotch immediately starting to get him hard.

"Um … Brian, we can't," Justin said as soon as he could talk.

Brian pushed him back and looked into his eyes. "Why not?" he asked, the worry evident on his face.

"It's nothing like that," Justin assured him realizing that Brian thought this had something to do with the Trip Bedford incident as he now chose to think of it.

"Then what?"

"You forgot, didn't you?"

"Forgot what?" Brian frowned.

"Forgot that I have a 'date' tonight." He used his fingers to put quotation marks around the word date.

"A date?" Brian asked searching his memory for the piece of information that would help to make sense of this. "Gwen!" he said as realization dawned. "The symphony."

"Almost," Justin laughed. "You get half a star."

"Why?"

"It's the Pittsburgh Philharmonic, not the symphony."

"Since when did you get to be such a classical music aficionado?" Brian immediately regretted his words as soon as they were out of his mouth. Neither of them wanted to think about their separation during the Ethan Gold period.

Justin chose his words carefully. "I'm not especially fond of classical music, but Gwen was trying to cheer me up when she invited me."

"Do you still need cheering up?"

Justin smiled one of his megawatt ones. He shook his head. "You've been doing a pretty good job of that. I especially like the part about working together."

Brian smirked. "Glad I did something right."

"So why are you home so early? Weren't you and Mom going to look at properties?"

"She called and said she was having trouble finding anything that I might want, so we put it off till next week."

"So, I guess you're going to be home all by yourself," Justin smirked.

"Oh, I forgot to tell you about the underwear party that we're hosting tonight. Correction, I'm hosting."

"Asshole!"

"Are you sure we don't have time for a quickie?" Brian asked as he nuzzled Justin's neck and let his hands massage that wonderful ass. He could feel Justin grow hard.

"Brian…"

"I need you," Brian whispered.

"I really don't have time," Justin said before Brian's mouth descended on his and he lost his train of thought.

He could feel Brian's hands removing and discarding the clothes he had taken so long to select. The kisses continued, robbing him of oxygen and making his insides burn with need. Brian's warm hands were everywhere arousing him even more. Brian's tongue was on his neck and his nipple and his ear. He moaned as the assault continued.

Finally when he was sure he couldn't stand it anymore Brian shoved him against the door frame into the kitchen. He managed to kick off his slacks which had pooled around his ankles and threatened to topple him over. He grabbed the door frame to keep his balance but also because his knees were so weak. He hung on for dear life.

Justin felt Brian's hot breath on the back of his neck and it made him shiver. Brian was still fully clothed and Justin was stark naked, all his "date" clothes strewn across the front foyer. He could feel Brian's hard cock trapped in his trousers as the man pressed against him.

"You forgot something about today too, Sunshine," Brian whispered.

"I did?" Justin was having trouble thinking at all, let alone remembering anything special about this particular day.

"It's six months since I … made that mistake. We don't have to use condoms anymore."

"Are you sure?"

"Abso-fucking-lutely."

"Briiaan," Justin moaned as he felt Brian's fingers probing and opening. He felt the coldness of lube being applied and then Brian was pressing into him and it felt so fucking good. It had been so long since they had done it raw, and nothing felt better. It was like every groove and vein of Brian's cock left its imprint inside him. He moaned as Brian continued his thrusts.

"Oh, my fucking god, Brian. I'm going to explode!" Justin cried.

"Hang on just a bit longer," Brian panted as he thrust again and again. He never wanted this to end, but he knew they were both so close.

"Shit! I can't," Justin gasped as he shot his load all over the door frame and Brian came at the same time inside of him, so deep that he could almost taste it.

"Fuck!" Brian panted as he tried to get his breath and stay upright while the room spun around him. He closed his eyes and hung onto Justin.

Justin's nails dug into the door frame looking for purchase, anything to keep him from tumbling to the floor. His legs felt like rubber and his heart was pounding at least double its normal rate. He felt Brian's weight against him and his softening cock still inside him. They hadn't had an orgasm quite like that since before Trip Bedford.

"We're back," he managed to whisper as he felt Brian slip out, and his lover gently bit his neck.

"Yeah," Brian agreed trying to open his eyes and focus. That had been one of the most intense experiences they had ever shared. He snaked his arm around Justin and pulled the smaller body against his own. "That was worth a few extra minutes, wasn't it?"

Just then the front doorbell rang. Justin let out a groan.

"That has to be Gwen and I'm fucking naked."

"Grab your clothes and run upstairs. I'll stall her," Brian said as he adjusted his trousers and smirked at his partner. Bent over picking up his scattered clothes, there was nothing Brian wanted more than to plow that tight little ass one more time. However, he cleared his throat as Justin raced up the stairs. Brian headed to the front door.

He pulled it open with a cheery, "Hello, Gwen."

She looked at the smirk on his face but decided not to say anything as she had just an inkling of an idea about what might have been going on when she rang the bell. The heightened color in Brian's cheeks and his jaunty air spoke volumes. Definitely a self-satisfied man, or rather a partner-satisfied man.

"Is Justin ready? We have a dinner reservation in twenty minutes. I was expecting him ten minutes ago."

"He's upstairs primping," Brian said smugly. "You know how he is."

"Hrmpf," she said letting him know she didn't buy that for a minute. Then she smiled to let him know it was all right. She understood a little bit about lust herself. Marc was one sexy man when he wanted to be.

"Come in for a minute. I'm sure Justin will be right down."

Gwen walked into the foyer and looked around. There was a pair of underwear lying on the third step of the stairs. She smiled to herself. She had been right about what they were doing before she arrived.

"Would you like a drink?" Brian asked moving to the bar and pouring himself a glass of Beam.

"No, thanks. We really need to get going," she said looking at her watch. She hated being late.

"Justin," Brian shouted. "What the fuck are you doing up there?"

At that moment Justin came down the stairs wearing what he had had on a few minutes before. He didn't look too rumpled but his cheeks were definitely crimson.

"I'm ready, Gwen. Sorry to keep you waiting," he said as he gave Brian a death glare. "Let's get going before we lose our reservation."

"I'm so glad you're coming with me," Gwen gushed as she linked her arm through Justin's. "Bye, Brian."

"Enjoy your night at the symphony."

"Philharmonic." They disappeared out the front door with Justin mouthing, "You'll pay later."

Brian merely snickered to himself. Somebody would pay later that night but he didn't think either of them would mind.

-----

Brian made himself a sandwich and then tried to find something on TV. He wasn't used to being alone at night anymore, especially on a Friday night. He had long since forsaken clubbing at least as a regular activity. The clubs had always been the place to find a trick and he hadn't needed a trick since Justin. Even though he refused to admit that to Justin for such a long time, the truth was that he had little desire for other men once he knew Justin was waiting for him. He had fought that realization for many years, but now he was fully committed to it and to Justin. They were tied together in more ways than he liked to think about. And he was about to initiate one more link between them. If he could start his own company, then Justin would be working for him for at least the first while.

Brian finished his sandwich and switched off the TV. He hit the remote for the stereo and had to smile. Justin must have put this CD in. It played, "Let's Hear It for the Boy".

That song had bittersweet memories. It was the beginning of the end of his old life. He shook his head but had to chuckle to himself. Justin had balls. That was for sure. He knew what he wanted and he went after it. Always had.

He also knew what he didn't want. He didn't want a Brian who couldn't show him love and respect in the traditional ways. Back then Justin hadn't understood all the ways that Brian was telling him how much he loved him, without ever saying those words. And Brian had paid the price for his inability to say "I love you".

Ethan Gold! Where the fuck did that name come from? Brian stared at the stereo. Justin was going to hear classical music tonight. He wondered if his husband would be remembering the man he had once left Brian for. How could he help but remember while sitting in a symphony hall. There would be several violinists in the orchestra.

Brian wondered what had happened to Ethan Gold. They had parted ways with a tacit understanding that Ethan needed to value himself and make his way in the world. He needed to leave Justin alone. The last Brian had heard of him he had gone off to study and play in Europe. He was probably still there.

The song on the stereo ended and Brian flicked it off. He was going to go crazy sitting there listening to old songs and dredging up memories that were best left in the past. He grabbed his cell phone which he had set on the coffee table. He hit number three on his speed dial.

"Hey, Brian, what's up?" the familiar voice said.

"Mikey, what are you up to tonight?"

"Are you asking me out?" Michael laughed.

"Yeah, I guess I am."

"Um…is something wrong?"

"Wrong? Why do you ask?"

"You haven't called me to go out in what … over a year?"

"Has it been that long?"

"Yes, asshole. Where's Justin?"

"He had a date."

"A date? What the fuck are you talking about?"

"With a woman." Brian couldn't help but yank Michael's chain.

"Have you two gone nuts?"

"No, he's out with Gwen, our next door neighbor."

"Oh … well … I guess that's all right then," Michael said.

"Of course it's all right."

"So what are they doing?"

"They went to the symphony or the philharmonic or some fucking classical thing."

"Classical? Are you sure that's wise?"

Brian knew Michael was thinking about Ethan just the way he had. "It's fine, Michael. It's just a night out for Justin. And speaking of nights out, how about you meet me at Woody's for a drink?"

"Tonight?"

"Yeah, are you busy?"

"Um … can I bring Ben or did you want it to be just the two of us?"

"Bring the good professor by all means," Brian sighed. "I thought we'd shoot a game of pool and have a couple of drinks. That's all."

"Sure, we can do that. An hour?"

"Sounds good."

-----

Gwen and Justin finished up their meal at the little restaurant not far from the symphony hall.

"That was very good, Justin," Gwen smiled. "But I think we better skip dessert and coffee and get over to the hall. It's almost a ten minute walk and we don't want to be late."

"It was good you knew about that parking lot. It should save us a lot of time. We don't have to move the car and we should be able to get out easily when the hall lets out," Justin said as he signaled for the check.

"I discovered it a long time ago. We used to park in the lot next to the hall and then we would be a half hour getting out of it. Marc used to be furious by the time we finally pulled into traffic. This way we get a little exercise and his blood pressure doesn't go through the roof.

Justin signed the credit card slip and they got up to leave.

"Thanks for dinner," Gwen smiled as they walked outside.

"It's a nice night for a stroll," Justin said looking around.

"I think a brisk walk is more in order," Gwen replied looking at her watch.

Justin nodded and they started off at a quick pace.

"The only flaw in this whole parking plan is when it's pouring rain," Gwen laughed as they hurried along.

"It's not supposed to rain tonight, is it?" Justin asked with a frown. "The umbrella's in the car."

"I don't think they're calling for rain, but it wouldn't be the first time that I've come home looking like a drowned rat," Gwen laughed.

"You mean Marc didn't run through the rain and pull the car up to the main entrance to get you?"

"Would Brian do that for you?"

"Not bloody likely. He'd grab my hand and we'd make a run for it."

"Welcome to my world," Gwen laughed as they arrived at the front steps of Philharmonic Hall.

-----

A little before nine Brian arrived at Woody's. He walked in to find Ben and Michael already there. They had nabbed a table to shoot pool. Brian grabbed a beer at the bar and joined them.

"Professor," Brian smirked as he gave Michael a kiss.

"Brian," Ben smirked back.

"So, you ready to have your ass kicked, Mikey?"

"It just might be my night to tan your hide," Michael boasted while Ben smiled approvingly.

"That'll be the day," Brian said as he racked them up.

"I'll watch from over here," Ben said. He took his beer to a nearby table and sat down. He grabbed the newspaper that was lying there and started flipping through it.

Michael broke and Brian proceeded to clear the table.

"Fuck!" Michael reacted when the last ball fell.

"Haven't lost my touch," Brian stated his tongue in cheek. "I need another beer." He headed for the bar.

"How the fuck does he do that?" Michael asked Ben as he walked over to the table where Ben was sitting. "He never practises."

"I bet he has a pool table hidden away in the basement of his house. A secret practiser," Ben laughed. "He probably spends hours at the pool table every night," Ben said trying to cheer Michael up.

Brian reappeared with three beers and handed one to each of them. "Want me to break for you?"

Michael shook his head. "I'm sick of being the butt of your handiwork."

"I thought you were Ben's butt?"

"Ha, ha, ha," Michael said making a face.

"You're so much fun tonight," Brian stated.

"You just miss Justin."

"Yeah, I do," Brian admitted.

"You did pretty well without his crotch to aim at."

"Actually that was always somewhat of a distraction."

"So, how come you didn't go to the symphony too?"

"I wasn't invited."

"You two are never out separately anymore," Michael observed.

"Sure we are," Brian frowned.

"No, you aren't. You're joined at the hip, just like Ben and me."

"Well, we are committed," Brian smirked. He wasn't sure whether he was pleased by Michael's observation or ticked off by it.

"I never thought I would hear those words come out of Brian Kinney's mouth, but here you are. Remember the days when you couldn't even say the word relationship?"

"Ancient history."

"Yeah, I guess it is for both of us."

"Let's sit down and finish our beers." Brian slid into the seat across from Ben and Michael pulled up another chair. "What's so interesting?" Brian asked when he realized Ben was staring at a page of the newspaper as if transfixed.

"There's an ad here for the philharmonic. They're doing Mozart tonight."

"Fascinating," Brian said sarcastically.

"And guess who the guest soloist is."

There was a long pause as Brian frowned. Ben held up the paper and pointed to the ad where the soloist's name was printed in heavy black type.

"Fuck!" Brian managed to get out after he recovered from choking on his beer.