Title: You’re the One I Need…
Story Type: AU
Word Count: 1554
Warnings: Angst, Passion and Lust…
Beta Queen: Bigj52

Summary: Imagine if S1 E9 had gone a little differently.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, plot, etc. are property of their respective owners, including, but not limited to Russell T. Davies, Cowlip, and Showtime. The author of this story is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended…


You’re the One I Need


“You promised! You knew I was making dinner tonight, and now you’re bailing on me!”

“Justin. Please. Trust me. This is the last thing I want to do tonight. Listen. I’ll try and get home as soon as I can.”

“Fine! Whatever! Take as long as you want!”

Shit! I hate disappointing Justin, again. But my old man is broke and as much as I hate him, I always end up helping him out.

I procrastinate at the office as long as I can, finishing up all the paperwork on my desk before I head out to the Union Hall.

“Sonny Boy! Come here, and have a drink with the boys.”

“This is my son. The executive!”

I cringe as I look down at the weary old men who spend their evenings here drinking, avoiding going home to their wife and kids. I’m so thankful this isn’t my life. It could easily have been, if I didn’t work my ass off studying. Luckily I landed a scholarship to Penn State. They’re weathered and beaten down long before there time, living a miserable life from paycheck to paycheck.

“Sonny Boy. Come buy your old man a drink.”

We head to the bar, and he orders top shelf whisky. Nothing but the best for my old man when someone else is paying. But I don’t mind. I can use a stiff drink, because I know what’s coming. It’s always the same, but I’m not the same anymore. I’ve changed and it’s time to make a few things clear to dear old Jack.





“How’s my rich son? Are you still working at that fancy job, making lots of money? What is it you do anyways?”

“Advertising.”

I can’t believe he still doesn’t remember what I do for a living.

“Right. Well, don’t work too hard. You’ve got to leave time for the ladies.”

“Always.”

“But be careful. They may say they don’t want to get married, but trust me, Sonny Boy, they all do.”

“Don’t worry about me.”

“You still banging that blond? She sure was a looker. What was her name?”

“Justin. My blond’s name is Justin.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Cock! I like cock, dad!”

God, I can’t believe I actually just said that. But, if Justin can confront his old man, so can I.

He roughly grabs me by the arm and pulls me outside.

“What the fuck are you saying? No son of mine is going is be a goddamn fag!”

“Careful, dad, some of the boys might hear you!”

“It’s a lie! Take it back!”

“I can’t. It’s who I am.”

He swings his fist towards my face, but I duck, missing his punch that surely would have left me with a black eye. But long gone are the days of Jack beating me, leaving me quivering on the ground.

“You goddamn bastard! I should have insisted that she abort you! I never wanted you anyways! I should have known you’d end up being some kind of queer!”

It hurts hearing him say it, not that I don’t already know it. But it hurts more than I expected. I can’t help wondering why he never loved me. I turn and start to walk away, when I hear him calling after me.

“Wait! Sonny Boy!”

I stand there looking at him as he comes closer. Pathetic little man that he is.

“Listen. I’m a little short on cash. Can you help your old man out?”

I can’t believe the nerve of this man, but I knew he wouldn’t forget. That’s the only reason he asked me to meet him tonight. I can’t help wonder why I put up with all his bullshit. Why I always hope things will be different between us. I reach inside my suit jacket and pull out an envelope.

“Spend it wisely. Because this is the last time I’m coming to your rescue.”

“Don’t be like that! Show me some respect!”

“Right, like the respect you show me?”

I turn and walk away this time, determined not to turn back around.





I usually give him a few hundred dollars, but I knew this was the end of the road for us. I can just see his eyes bulging out of his head when he sees it’s five thousand dollars. That should be enough to sever all ties between us.

I know I should head home, but I make a left instead of a right, and end up in some sleazy bar. The kind of place where whores flaunt their big tits, hanging on anyone that will buy them a drink. Just the kind of place I’m sure Jack will be spending his windfall. I sit in the dark, alone at a table in the back of the bar. I can’t help pondering why my parents never loved me, as I proceed to drink myself into a stupor.

~~~

I hear someone pulling the loft door back, but it’s not Brian. It’s Michael.

“Where’s Brian? Did he already go to Woody’s?”

“He’s working late.”

“I don’t think so. I already went by his office, and no one was there.”

I try not to show the disappointment and sadness that descends upon my heart, as Michael tells me that Brian probably blew me off for some other man.

“Maybe he had a dinner meeting?”

“Right! Maybe he’s fucking some tall, dark and handsome stranger. Someone more to his liking. You know he’s not really attracted to blonds.”

“There’s no locks on our door. Brian’s free to do as he wishes.”

God, I hate how much it hurts to hears those words come out of my mouth.

“Either way, he’s not here.”

“I’ll try and catch up with him at Babylon. Don’t wait up!”

Michael slams the door on his way out, as I feel my heart clenching in my chest. He promised we’d have tonight all to ourselves. Just the two of us. I wonder why I’m still here.

~~~

I must have fallen asleep, as I wake up hearing Brian stumbling into the loft. Thank God he’s alone. I don’t think I could handle it if he brought home a trick.

“Sunshine! God! I missed you!”

He lands on top of me, pinning me to the sofa. He reeks of whisky, and I can’t help sniffing him for the smell of sex. To my surprise he smells like stale cigarettes, and that unique scent that is all Brian. He runs his fingers through my hair, and kisses me with so much passion that he’ll leave bruises on my lips.

He’s slurring his words, as he pulls at his suit jacket, trying to remove it. I help him as he continues ranting about his evening. I have no idea what he’s talking about, but it’s obvious he’s upset and very drunk.

“I fucking hate that bastard!”

“Ssssh. Calm down. You’re home now.”

I wonder if he got into a fight with Marty Ryder about making partner.

“I love my son!”

“Of course you do. You’re a great father.”

“I’m better than him! I worked hard to get where I am!”

“Yes, you did. You’re a brilliant ad man.”

“It’s not my fault that his life turned out the way it did!”

“Of course not. We’re all responsible for our own choices.”

Wow. He’s really all over the place. I can’t seem to follow his conversation. I have no idea what he’s talking about. But he’s talking to me about his feelings for the first time, and that’s something. So, I guess we’re making progress.

“He was just too chicken shit to break free, to try and make a better life for himself!”

“Some men are just weak.”

“I love my son!”

“I know.”

“But, he never loved me! Why couldn’t he love me?”

This is about his father? Wow, he never talks about his father.

“I missed you tonight. I wish I’d brought you with me.”

“Really?”

“Can you just imagine the look on his face when I introduced you to him?”

“I told him! I put it right in his face! Loud enough for his drinking buddies to hear! Jack’s fancy executive son likes cock!”

“Oh my God, Brian… You told your father?”

He sways as he stands, animatedly telling me, “You’re not the only brave little fucker in this household!”

I reach out and hold him steady as he regains his footing. He pulls me into his arms, holding me close. I can hardly believe what I’m hearing. “I love you, Justin. You’re the only one I need, the only one I want.”

I know he’s drunk, so I help him to the bedroom, and undress him. He tells me about Jack’s hurtful words, and questions again why his parents never loved him. I hold him tight, telling him that I love him, and that I’ll always be there for him. I’m so proud of him for finding the strength to admit who he is, and who he loves, to his father. In a strange way I’m glad he went to see Jack tonight, even if he had to experience the pain of hearing his father’s homophobic disdain. We lie in bed holding each other, and I know things have changed between us. He’s no longer afraid to express his feelings and say he loves me.