Aftermath

Chapter 1

“Brian, it’s time,” Ted said gently for the second time in as many days. The solemn accountant laid a hand on Brian’s shoulder, somehow breaking through the wall that Brian had resurrected. The first time Ted said the words was at the concert hall when the rescue squad arrived. Brian’s head was still resting in his mother’s lap. It was now time to leave the funeral home to take his mother to the church where Father Tom would say the mass for the dead. Then Joan would be laid to rest next to her husband.

Brian was reluctant to leave. “I’m staying,” he growled.

“Bri, do you really want to watch them close the coffin?” Ted asked as carefully as he could. He knew all too well that tone in Brian’s voice. It was the one that said ‘Fuck with me and I’ll break you in two.’

“Yes.”

“All right, we’ll be just outside the door,” Ted assured him then turned to go.

“Ted,” Brian began, taking a breath before Ted left. “Thank you. I’ll be right out,” Brian said, a little calmer and back in control. The funeral director and assistant had come into the room to perform their last duties and prepare Joan’s coffin for the trip to the church. Brian’s suspicious nature would not let the procedure go unobserved, but most of all he wanted one last private moment with his mother.

“What’s he doing in there?!” Brian could hear his sister wail through the thick doors. He rolled his eyes; some things would never change, including Claire’s dramatics. Even Emmett, the queen of all things dramatic, was remaining sedate as he and his boys paid their last respects.

Brian could hear Justin trying to explain and calm Claire, but she was having no part of it. It was taking both Debbie and Jennifer and their no nonsense ways to keep Claire under control.

When the director was done and the pallbearers were in place, Brian slipped out of the room to rejoin his family.

“Are you all right?” Justin whispered as Brian took his hand to lead him to the parking lot.

“Yeah,” Brian murmured, his eyes searching the lot.

“She’s with my mother and Seth. Gus is with her too,” Justin assured his spouse.

“Thank you,” Brian said with relief. Claire was too distraught to make any of the arrangements so it was up to Brian to handle everything including shouldering the expense. But that also meant everything else including explaining things to Bree was left to Justin. Brian was feeling a bit guilty about that.

“No need to thank me, that’s what husbands are for,” Justin said half teasing, trying to lighten Brian’s mood.

Brian looked down at Justin, then pressed his lips to the side of Justin’s head. “I love you,” Brian whispered, his heart a little bit lighter.

“I know,” Justin replied with a touch of smugness.

They got into Brian’s Jeep Wrangler then maneuvered behind the limo that was taking Claire and her family to the church. Brian could have arranged for another limo for himself, Justin, Gus and Bree but he decided he was more comfortable in his Jeep. He realized that at one point in his life the Jeep represented the ‘faggot’ in him, and it would have been the last ‘fuck you’ if he and his mother had not reconciled. But now the Jeep, along with his Corvette, just represented Brian.

“Brian, I can drive, if you want,” Justin offered. Brian just shook his head. This was something he needed to do. When all the cars were in line, they made the slow procession to the church.

*****

“Who knew old Joanie had this many friends,” Debbie whispered to Carl as they entered the church which was rapidly filling up with members of the family and the community.

Huddled together in one section were patrons of Danny’s bookstore and other members of The Village restoration. They had all gotten to know Joanie as a friendly, outgoing and helpful member of their little tight knit part of Pittsburgh. Many of Hunter’s kids were there; several of whom Joan had helped further their education.

“Why are we here?” grumbled Craig.

“Because Joan was your granddaughter’s grandmother,” Susan growled back at him. She gave her stubborn husband a glare worthy of Brian Kinney. Craig sat back in his pew, deciding he better behave himself for the rest of the ceremony.

Riley, a few pews up from Craig and Susan gently picked up his partner’s hand. “Danny,” he said gently. Danny continued to stare at the front of the church like he was seeking some invisible answer. “Danny,” Riley repeated.

“Um, yes, what?” Danny asked finally turning to his partner.

Riley noticed the shadow over Danny’s usually mischievous eyes. “She’s in a better place,” he told Danny.

“Better place? Fuck it! I want her here with us. I loved that old woman,” Danny declared. “The store won’t be the same without her.”

“We’ll all miss her.”

“Not as much as me.”

Riley knew that was probably true. Danny and Joan had become fast friends. Instead of protesting that things would be all right, Riley decided the best thing he could do for his partner was to hold on tightly to the hand he held. That’s exactly what he did, giving the hand a gentle squeeze of support.

Claire and Steve McNally walked into the church. As they made their way to a seat near the front, Claire noted the good turnout. She thought Joan would have been pleased. They sat down in a pew, Claire letting out a soft sigh. Steve took her hand.

“I know,” he said.

“She wasn’t much older than me,” Claire replied.

“Yeah, it kind of brings it home that we’re all heading to the same place.”

“I … hated her for quite a long time.”

“I can’t imagine you hating anyone,” Steve told her truthfully.

“I was young, and I loved Jack, and he chose her over me. He left me alone and pregnant. It was a lot to deal with.” Claire wiped a tear from her eye, more for herself than for Joan.

“But that was a long time ago.”

“Yes, a long time. I guess I came to terms with it somewhere along the line, but it was hard.”

“No one would ever know that when they met you.”

“I’m good at covering things up?” Claire asked, almost surprised by the statement.

“When you want to,” Steve said with a gentle smile. “But thank God you don’t want to … not anymore.”

“No, not anymore,” Claire said with a little smile of her own. “I grew to like Joan.”

“I know, and that’s a good thing.”

“Yes it is. I’ll miss her.”

“We all will,” Steve said patting Claire’s hand.

John, Bobby and Patrick slid into the pew next to Claire and Steve. Claire smiled at her son. He was the best thing that had ever happened to her. Her one regret was that Jack had never known his son. Joan had got to know John, and they had become quite close over the years. Claire was pleased that the relationship had been friendly and warm. John would have good memories of Joan.

“How is Brian doing?” Claire asked her son.

John shook his head. “He’s not ready to talk to anybody,” he said softly. “He only wants to be with Justin.”

“He’s not shutting you out,” Claire replied, sorry to see her son sad, and Brian must be hurting so much.

“He is shutting me out,” John said. “But I understand. I would probably do the same if this was your…” He couldn’t finish the statement.

Claire decided to finish it for him. “My funeral,” she stated. “I hope when that time comes, and it will, that you won’t shut Brian out. You two have always been there for each other … once you found your way to your brother.”

“You mean once Brian found me.”

“Yes, that’s what I meant. How is Bree taking this?”

“She’s with Seth and Jennifer while Brian dealt with all the details for the funeral. I’m not sure how much she really understands. Justin tried to explain it to her, but he said she just wanted her Gamma Joan.”

Claire looked over at Patrick. “How are you doing, Patrick?” Claire asked.

Patrick shrugged. “I don’t know why people have to die,” he said sadly.

“It’s the circle of life,” Claire replied, hoping that might clarify things for her grandson.

“Like from The Lion King?” Patrick asked with a furrowed brow. It was one of his favorite movies. He remembered that the baby lion had taken his place as the king.

“It is like that,” Bobby told his son. “Life goes on no matter how much we miss those who have passed.”

Patrick looked at the floor. He knew his dad and his grandmother were right, but he also knew how sad Bree was. He wanted to fix it for her, but there was nothing he could do. He was sad too. He liked Gramma Joan. He didn’t like funerals at all.

Michael and Ben entered the church and walked down the aisle to sit with Debbie and Carl.

“Hi, Maw,” Michael said.

“It’s a sad day,” Debbie responded.

“She was old,” Michael noted. Debbie gave him a not so gentle smack to the cheek. “Ow!” Michael reacted rubbing his face. “What was that for?”

“I’m old too, in case you haven’t noticed. Joan was only a little older than me. Is that what you’re going to say at my funeral? She was old!”

“No, Ma, I didn’t mean it like that.” Michael tried to correct his seemingly harsh statement.

“I think Michael meant that Joan had lived a good long life,” Ben supplied. He hoped that would help his husband get out of the hole he had dug for himself.

“Yeah, that’s what I meant.”

Debbie looked at her son. “I hope so,” she muttered.

Carl decided to step in. “It’s going to be difficult for Brian,” he observed. “Have you talked to him?” he asked Michael.

“I tried, but Justin was taking all the calls. He said Brian didn’t want to talk to anyone, but I know he would have talked to me if Justin would have given him the phone,” Michael complained.

“I’m sure Justin was following Brian’s wishes,” Ben stated.

“Maybe,” Michael conceded. “Is my honeybun here?” he asked looking around the church. He spotted JR sitting with Lindsay and Candy. He waved much to the dismay of his husband. “What?” he demanded when Ben gave him a gentle elbow to the ribs.

“This is a funeral, not a sporting event,” Ben admonished.

Michael giggled. “Brian used to think things like this were stupider than sporting events,” he commented.

Debbie shook her head. “But Brian grew up,” she stated.

Michael looked somewhat bewildered at Debbie’s comment, while Ben merely shook his head.

“I guess a lot of people will miss Joan,” Michael noted as he took in the church quickly filling with people.

“Joan made a lot of friends since she and Brian reconciled,” Debbie said.

“Yeah, I guess she did,” Michael agreed, although he still remembered all the bad things Brian used to say about his mother … and even more about old Jack.

Suddenly there was a hush as some new people entered the church through a side door. Loud sobs preceded the appearance of Claire who was supported on each side by one of her sons. Peter and John looked rather embarrassed by the actions of their mother as they tried to hustle her over to the front pew where they would sit. Claire’s husband followed behind looking baffled by the church full of people. His wifew was carrying on like she and her mother had been so close. He knew that wasn’t really the case.

After more wailing, the boys finally got Claire seated and sat down beside her. Everyone waited for Brian Kinney to appear.

A couple of moments later Brian and Justin came through the same door that Claire had used. Brian looked pale and tired, but there certainly wasn’t any wailing on his part. He was as handsome and well dressed as ever, but those that knew him well knew how he was suffering. Justin held Brian’s arm and only had eyes for his husband. He looked very concerned. He and Brian sat down on the same pew as Claire and her family but as far away from them as they could.

Bree and Gus were in the pew behind, and Bree reached for her father. Brian lifted her and her grey bunny over the pew and she cuddled against Brian’s chest. He held her and the bunny tightly while leaning against Justin.

Gus squeezed his father’s shoulder and Brian gave his son a sad smile in return.

“I’m here, Pop,” Gus whispered.

“Thanks,” Brian replied. “I’m going to need you.” Gus nodded in understanding.

“Dada, can we go home?” a teary eyed Bree asked.

“No, Squirt, we have to do this for Grandma Joan.”

“I want her to be here with us,” Bree stated.

“She’s in heaven now,” Justin whispered to their daughter. “But she’ll always be in our hearts and memories.”

“I don’t want memories,” Bree replied. “I want her.”

“We all do,” Brian whispered into Bree’s hair.

Bree looked up into her father’s face as a tear ran down each of their cheeks. Brian squeezed his daughter tighter.

Father Tom stepped up to the pulpit from where he would conduct the funeral. All eyes turned from Brian to the priest. All eyes except Justin’s whose eyes were full of worry. He prayed Brian would be able to get through the rest of the day.

“Let us pray...”

Brian tuned out the ceremony of his youth and focused solely on the little girl in his arms, the silent strength from the man sitting next to him and the quiet concern and determination from the young man sitting just behind him. Brian felt surrounded by the love of his family, something he never thought he’d ever have in his wildest dream, but it was a reality. He was painfully aware that many of his family were expecting Brian to go off on a bender or revert back to the behavior of his checkered past.

At some point Father Tom called for members of the congregation to come up and share a few of their Joan memories. Danny came up and shared many stories of how he and Joan formed their special partnership at his store. The former drag queen entertainer and the very Catholic matron made a very unique combination. A slightly more masculine version of Divina Devore made his appearance as he spoke of Joan’s level-headedness and how she brought out the best in the kids that would come into the store looking for books to help further their education. And how the lending library with the local colleges came about. Danny choked, unsuccessfully holding back his tears as he described a determined woman who attacked new technology so that she could keep up with her grandchildren and with those she ‘adopted.’

“I will miss that old woman, I really will,” Danny said finally just before he left the podium.

One by one, members of the family came up to share their Joan stories. John stood to share his own, slowly walking up the aisle then turning to face the crowd.

“My name is John Anderson and I’m Brian’s older brother. The good looking brother just in case you hadn’t noticed,” John added, successfully lightening up the morose mood of those gathered in the church. Brian looked up and smiled at John. A few people nervously giggled. John and Brian’s resemblance was still striking. John had a certain ruggedness to his looks while Brian had that polished way about him. Both remained stunning. The congregation gave John their full attention.

“I first met Joan right here in this church. I had been asked to give an estimate on the roof. It seems that God’s house had sprung a leak and Father Tom wanted my opinion. The good news was he didn’t need a new roof, just a few repairs. The better news was that Joan agreed to come to Bree’s christening. A lot happened on that day, not only was Bree christened but the rift between Joan, her son and our family began to close. It didn’t happen overnight nor was it an easy fix. But as a builder I know when you have the right materials, the blueprints, the right tools, and lots of determination, you’ll get the job done.

“Joan became an important part of our family, bridging a gap across more than just generations. Her presence will be missed but she leaves grandchildren that have wonderful memories of a grandmother that loved them without reservation, and a son who finally had the mother he always wanted and deserved.” John and Brian exchanged knowing looks.

While John slowly walked back to his pew, Brian stood, passing Bree and her grey bunny to her daddy. Brian met John in the aisle and the brothers hugged long and hard.

“Go on,” John whispered into Brian’s ear. “Say what you need to say. And in your own way; you are the word man,” John reassured his brother.

“Yeah, this coming from the rock man,” Brian quipped. John patted Brian’s back, relieved to see some of the old Brian Kinney back. John released Brian so that he could go up and say a few words.

Brian stood in front of the church near his mother’s casket which was draped in a blanket of white roses. He placed his hand on the casket, gently fingering a flower petal. Claire began to wail again; Brian waited until she had calmed.

“This is the last place I’d ever imagined being. Being here in a church, at old Joanie’s funeral. It’s amazing the damn place hasn’t crumbled down around my ears,” Brian said as he looked up at the richly decorated ceiling. Those who knew of the tumultuous relationship Joan and Brian had shared and Brian’s notorious past nodded their heads knowingly. Debbie couldn’t help letting out a short cackle. Jennifer laughed but then quickly got herself under control. Justin giggled; Brian Kinney, ex-stud of Liberty Avenue, who in Joan’s former eyes was as bad as the devil himself, was now eulogizing her in her own church.

“My brother, rock man, calls me the word man. I guess I am, it’s how I make a living, using words to make ordinary people spend their hard earned money to buy what I’m selling. But I never bought into this,” Brian said with a sweep of his arm. “Like many of us, we were taught that God loves us, loves all his people, unless of course, you’re like me. A fag. I was taught that God drew the line at loving fags. And then a miracle happened, a tiny blond baby girl miracle happened and I began to believe that maybe God did love me in his own way. I’m sure if old Joanie could hear me now she’d have some choice words for me but she’d have to agree that sometimes miracles do happen.”

Brian looked around at the faces of his family and the people who came to honor Joan’s memory.

“Brian fucking Kinney is standing here in a church, saying the prayers that he thought he had long forgotten for a woman that for most of his life he wished he could forget.”

Brian bent down to reverently kiss his mother’s casket. “Thank you God for making miracles,” Brian said out loud looking back up to the ceiling then gazing lovingly at the casket. “I love you, Mom. I’ll miss you.” Brian kissed the casket for the last time then proudly sauntered back to his family.

“I’m proud of you,” Justin whispered as he kissed Brian when Brian retook his seat. “I love you.”

“I know,” Brian replied smugly. They all turned to give their attention back to Father Tom.

Father Tom walked down from the altar to address the congregants. “I’ve know Joan for many years as her spiritual advisor and as her friend. I was fortunate to bear witness to her transformation from a bitter lonely woman to a loving mother, grandmother and friend as evidenced by all of you here today. She would have been so touched by this outpouring of friends and family. And probably never would have believed it!” Father Tom said with a sly smile.

Brian laughed as he nodded at the priest.

“We celebrate the life of Joan Kinney even as we mourn her death. Let us pray.”

Father Tom made a sweeping motion with his hands. The congregation all stood as the priest led the closing prayers.

*****

The funeral procession slowly made its way past Joan’s house, the last leg in the journey to her final rest. The limo carrying Claire and her family was following closely behind the hearse. Brian’s distinctive Jeep was behind the limo. Gus and Bree decided to take the ride with their dads. Bree was a little calmer with her daddies and with her Gus. John, Bobby, Patrick with Claire and Steve were right behind Brian. The rest of the family followed. It seemed like all of Pittsburgh was following.

When they finally reached the cemetery, Brian, Gus, Justin and John took their places next to the pall bearers, slowly walking beside the casket to the prepared grave. Father Tom followed quietly saying prayers. Claire began to sob softly in the background.

As the casket descended, Father Tom said the final prayers.

“God our Father,

we thank you that you have made each of us

in your own image,

and given us gifts and talents with which to serve you.

We thank you for Joan ,

the years we shared with her,

the good we saw in her,

the love we received from her.

Now give us strength and courage

to leave her in your care,

confident in your promise of eternal life

through Jesus Christ our Lord.

Amen.”

Everyone was given a white rose from the blanket that had been draped on the coffin. One by one friends and family dropped a rose in the grave, saying goodbye to Joan as they paid their last respects.

When the crowd was finally gone and all that was left was Brian and Justin, Brian reached into his pocket to pull out a small silver flask. He unscrewed the cap and took a swig of Joan’s favorite sherry. He reached back to offer some to Justin. Justin took a small sip then returned the flask to Brian.

“To you, Mom,” Brian said as he raised the flask in a toast. He then poured a few drops into the grave then finished off the flask as he dropped his own flower into the grave.

“Brian, it’s time,” Justin said gently then led his spouse away.

 

Aftermath

Chapter 2

“Brian, we need to go back to the house,” Justin said softly.

“Fuck the house!” Brian stared into the grave looking at all the flowers that had been dropped there by Joan’s friends and family.

“Brian, everyone will be waiting.”

“Fuck everyone!”

Justin decided to try another tack. “The men need to fill in the grave.”

Brian made some kind of strangled sound, barely audible. Justin realized that was not the right thing to say. He tried again. “Bree will be waiting for you wondering what’s happened.

Brian blinked hard. “Bree…”

“Yes, she needs you right now.”

“Yeah … I need her too. Did she go with Jennifer and Seth?”

“Yes, she and Gus.”

“Gus will look after her.”

“I know, but she wants you too.”

Brian shook his head. “Why is this so fucking hard? I … I miss her already.”

“You got to spend a lot of time with her these last years,” Justin said gently. “You were both happy about that.”

“It doesn’t make up for all the time we wasted.”

“But it’s better than never having reconciled at all.”

Brian looked deep into the blue eyes full of concern. He drew in a deep breath. “Let’s go,” he said after a minute.

With that, they made their way to the Jeep. Brian took the familiar streets leading to Joanie’s house. It was like being on autopilot. He didn’t have to think and that was a good thing.

When Brian entered his old home, a hush settled immediately, except for Claire sniffling in the background. Bree ran up to her father and threw herself into Brian’s arms.

“Dada, I thought you weren’t coming,” she whispered.

“I’m here, Squirt.” Bree’s hug squeezed him tight.

“You okay, Pop?” Gus asked with a worried look on his face.

“I will be,” Brian said not really believing his words. “Do you want to take Bree back to Jennifer and Seth’s? I think she’s had enough of this.” Brian glanced at Justin who nodded.

“Sure, Pop. I’ll go find them and make sure it’s okay.”

“It will be,” Justin said. “Sweetheart,” he said to Bree, “Gus is going to take you to Grandma Jenn’s and spend some time with you. Okay?”

“Nooo,” Bree said shaking her head. “Dada?” She clung even tighter to Brian.

“It’s for the best. Gus will play with you,” Brian said through the haze that this whole day had become.

“Come on, short stuff,” Gus said taking Bree from Brian. “Grandma Jenn is ready to go.”

“Love you, Dada,” Bree said reaching to kiss her older father. She did the same with Justin.

After more kisses and reassurances Jennifer, Seth, Gus and Bree left. Brian looked across the house packed with people. Claire stood next to Father Tom sniffling and weeping as she told him some irrelevant thing about her life and how much she loved her mother. Bullshit! It was all bullshit, Brian thought to himself.

“Brian, come sit down,” Justin said tugging on Brian’s arm.

Brian allowed himself to be directed over to the sofa where he and Justin sat down, people having given up their seats for the grieving son and his spouse. Brian realized this was where he had sat when Jack had died. That day he had been clutching Jack’s bowling bag which contained his father’s bowling ball. Brian looked over at Claire still moaning to the priest. She stood by the table of food that had been lovingly prepared by Debbie and Emmett and neighbors and friends. He remembered that Claire had asked for remembrances of her father, and how little good anyone had had to say about dear old Jack.

That was the moment he decided that he must do something to make this different from the unpleasant events at his father’s funeral. He cleared his throat and stood up. Justin looked up at him worry in his eyes.

“May I have your attention for a moment?” Brian said in a loud clear voice. He wanted his mother to be proud of him. The house quieted as eyes turned toward the tall handsome man.

“I want to thank you all for attending my mother’s funeral. Joan would be pleased with the turnout.” Some people chuckled. “For many years mom and I…” Brian hesitated. He had used the term “Mom” deliberately, but he found it hard to continue. “Mom and I were not on very good terms,” he finally managed to proceed. He glanced at Claire whose pinched face and wet eyes did nothing to bolster Brian’s confidence. “But since the birth of Justin’s and my daughter, Briana, Mom and I have found … a kind of … grace. We put our differences aside because we loved that little girl. We have had many happy years together since then. I will miss Joan very much.” Brian sat down.

The hush remained for a moment. A few people wiped their eyes as they thought about the journey that Joan and Brian had been through.

“I … I’d like to say something too,” Claire said. She didn’t want to be left out. This was her mother too.

“Fuck,” Brian muttered. He couldn’t imagine what she would say. “Why can’t she leave well enough alone?” Justin squeezed Brian’s arm in support.

“I loved my mother very much,” Claire was saying. “We didn’t see as much of each other recently as I would have liked.” She looked pointedly at Brian. “She has two fine grandsons, my boys, Peter and John,” Claire continued.

Brian felt his blood pressure escalate. “Joan has three grandsons. My son Gus should be included in that number,” Brian felt compelled to remind her. He wasn’t going to have his son slighted just because Gus was doing his duty as a good son and wasn’t there to speak for himself. “Gus and Joan were very close.”

“Of course,” Claire conceded with another sob, “but Gus couldn’t miss Joan any more than my sons and I do.” She looked defiantly at her brother daring him to contradict her.

Brian was about to do so. Sometimes his fucking sister was such a cunt.

Before he could open his mouth, Justin whispered, “Don’t Brian. Don’t stoop to her level.”

Brian really wanted to stoop to whatever level was required to make his sister eat her words, but he knew that would do nothing but ruin Joan’s final farewell, and he sincerely did not want to do that. He bit his tongue and said nothing.

Claire looked at the assembled group triumphantly and said, “At my father’s funeral in this same house, I asked people to express some memories of him. I’d like to do the same this time … for my mother.” She looked at her sons, silently asking them to say something about Joan. They both shook their heads.

Brian wondered if they simply didn’t want to speak in front of the large group or if they truly had nothing good to say about their grandmother. Whichever it was, it was a disgrace to Joan’s memory. “If I had Jack’s bowling ball, I’d brain them both with it,” Brian muttered.

Justin shook his head. He hadn’t been at Jack’s funeral, but he had heard enough about it to make the connection of the bowling ball which Brian had used to terrorize Claire’s boys, saying he had Jack’s head in the bag containing the ball.

Once again Brian’s friends came to the rescue. Lindsay spoke up. “I got to know Joan very well over the last few years. She was a wonderful mother and a loving grandmother to my son Gus and to Briana. Joan loved her grandchildren so very much … all of them. Lindsay felt that needed to be said. “She was a good woman and a kind soul.” This was quite different from Lindsay’s words at Jack’s funeral. “He gave me a mint,” she had said back then. How pitiful it had been that that was the only good thing she could think to say about the man. Now her kind words resonated through the house.

Claire wailed loudly.

“I spoke at Jack’s funeral too,” Michael said. “I didn’t know Joan as well as many of the rest of you might, but we could share a joke and a story. I thought she was a fine old broad.”

Everyone laughed and Claire wailed some more.

Brian looked at his friend. Michael looked tired; a funeral did take its toll on everyone. He nodded his approval of Michael’s words.

It was Emmett’s turn to stand up and clear his throat to get everyone’s attention. Brian wondered what on earth his longtime friend would say. Emmett was always unpredictable.

Emmett studied his audience for a moment. “I don’t know why we’re doing this after all the heartfelt and wonderful things that were said about Joan at the church. I’d like to conclude this with my own brief story of something Joan did recently.”

Brian frowned as he studied Emmett’s face. Emmett merely gave him a toothy grin.

“It’s okay, Brian. I won’t embarrass you,” Emmett said.

“You! Embarrass me?” Brian asked. “Like that would ever happen.”

There were lots of chuckles at the verbal sparring of the two men. Emmett stuck his tongue out quickly at Brian earning some more laughs. Brian merely smiled and shook his head.

“If I may continue,” Emmett said, “after being so fondly interrupted.” Brian had to smile at that statement. “A few weeks ago Drew and I adopted our son Richie. Right after it became official I received a box in the mail. It contained a picture of Drew, Richie and me in an elegant silver frame. It had been taken at our celebration party for Richie’s adoption. Joan had not attended that party. I suspect she wasn’t feeling all that well even back then, because she loved all our family gatherings and was usually there for all of us.”

Brian nodded as he felt tears well up at the memory of that last big gathering without Joan.

“With the picture was a note, “Emmett continued. “It said that she wanted to congratulate Drew, Richie and I on having made a family together. She said she had got the picture from Brian and had had the frame specially engraved. On the frame it said, Family is everything. I know that’s exactly how Joan felt. Her family was so important to her.” Emmett looked at Claire who had finally stopped crying while she listened to Emmett’s story. Emmett knew he had accomplished at least part of what he wanted to do. “If you have a glass, please raise it in a toast to ‘a fine old broad’ as Michael so eloquently stated.”

To a chorus of “Hear, hear!” and “To Joan”, they all sipped their drinks.

Brian let out a soft sigh and stood. He walked over to Emmett and gave him a big hug.

People started to file out of the house knowing nothing more need be said.

“Bri, will you be okay?” Michael asked before he and Ben left for home. Michael wasn’t ready to move back to Pittsburgh, not just yet. He had grown used to the quiet of the lane but they had decided to spend a few days here, air out the house and check on the store. They’d go back to the lane within the week.

“Yeah, Mikey, I will be,” Brian said with a big sigh as he pulled the smaller man closer to kiss his head. “Don’t worry, I won’t be showing up in your bedroom, drunk or otherwise, anytime soon,” Brian reassured his old friend with a chuckle.

“That’s good, cause I’m not sure how Ben would like it,” Michael replied with a small smile.

“I’d allow it for one night then I’d throw your skinny ass out, Kinney,” Ben growled then winked at his spouse and friend.

“Thanks professor, I’ll keep that in mind,” Brian said as he released Michael then accepted a hug from the big muscle man.

“Come on, babe, time to go home. It’s been a long day,” Ben said as he got their jackets. “Good night, Brian. Please let me know if there’s anything I can help you with,” Ben said as he squeezed Brian’s shoulder. Brian nodded as he watched his friends leave Joan’s house.

“What are you going to do with this house?” John asked. He, Bobby and Claire’s family were the only ones left in the house, plus Father Tom who appeared to be one of the few who could get Claire calmed enough to listen to reason.

“I’m not sure,” Brian answered. “I did convince Joan to draw up a will. Considering the mess Jack left when he died, it didn’t take too much convincing. Joan didn’t leave much. Whatever cash she had and insurance policies will be split up between the grandkids. She was very specific about that. She does give Claire first refusal on the house,” Brian explained being familiar with the terms of Joan’s will.

“I don’t want it!” Claire shrieked then began to cry again.

“You don’t have to make any decisions right now,” Brian said more to Claire’s husband, Andrew, than to Claire. Brian had had enough of Claire’s histrionics. Andrew was Claire’s second husband, a quiet gentle man who appeared to have the patience of a saint when dealing with one very emotionally overwrought Claire Kinney.

“Andrew, the house has been paid off and it’s wired with an alarm. We have time to decide what to do with it and its contents,” Brian explained. Andrew nodded. “I think I’ll stay here for a while until the will is read,” Brian said as he looked around the room.

“Here?” Justin asked. This was the first he’d heard of Brian’s plans.

“At the loft,” Brian qualified his statement, but Brian staying in Pittsburgh was still news to Justin.

“Brian, Bree needs to go back to school,” Justin whispered as he leaned into his spouse.

“I know, Sunshine, and Gus has to go back to Penn. I’ll just stay for a while until we make some decisions and then I’ll come home. I can spend time at Kinnetik.”

“I’m sure Ted and Cynthia will be thrilled,” Justin muttered. He wasn’t very happy at the thought of being separated from Brian, especially at this time when Brian was a lot more vulnerable than he would ever admit.

“Brian, I’m at a critical juncture with the city reclamation project and I’m getting tired of hotel food. Could I stay with you at the loft?” John asked after a quickly whispered conversation with Bobby. Justin was visibly relieved at John’s suggestion.

“Yeah,” Brian said distractedly. “That would be fine,” he said not realizing that he was just manipulated. Normally Brian would have seen right through the ploy.

“Good, then I’ll bring my bag over to the loft,” John said.

“I guess we should clean up,” Brian said almost absentmindedly.

“Bri, Emm and Debbie took care of all that and we have leftovers to bring to the loft.” Justin held up the bags that Emmett and Debbie had packed up for Brian and for Claire’s family. Andrew gratefully took the bags then led his sobbing wife out to their car. Claire’s sons had already left. They had their own families to deal with.

“I’ll be on my way,” Father Tom said to the brothers and their spouses. “Brian, if you need me, please don’t hesitate to call on me. I’m your friend as well as Joan’s priest.”

“You’ve been a good friend to my mother and to me. I think you’re one of the few who really knows all my sins and doesn’t give a shit about them,” Brian said with a smirk.

“It’s what I do, Brian,” Tom said with his own smirk. “I mean it, anytime you need to talk, day or night, I’m there.”

Brian drew the priest into a hug. “Thank you,” he whispered.

Tom said goodbye, again expressing his condolences then blessing them all before leaving Joan’s house.

“I guess that’s our cue to leave, Sunshine,” Brian quipped. They gave the house one more check, setting timers, removing any trash then finally setting the alarm as they locked up. John and Bobby followed Brian and Justin back to the loft.

“John, I’m worried about Brian,” Bobby commented. Steve and Claire were staying overnight with Debbie and Carl then leaving early the next day. Patrick was with them. He was going to be dropped off at Rachel’s; he had to get back to school too.

“Mmm,” John mumbled.

“Is that all you can say is ‘mmm’? Your brother looks like he’s on the verge of an emotional breakdown,” Bobby stated.

“No.”

“No? No, what? No, you’re not worried? Or no, you don’t agree with me.”

“Just no. I don’t think Brian’s on the verge of anything. Just the opposite, I think he’s handling it quite well. But just in case I’m wrong, I plan to stick with him like glue. He does better with someone or something to care for. I think he prefers that over caring for himself.”

“So you’re going to let him take care of you.”

“Yes.”

“He’ll eventually see through your act.”

“It’s not an act. I had an awful vision of my own mother’s funeral. Joan wasn’t that much older than mother.”

“Maybe, but Joan’s health wasn’t the greatest even though she cleaned up her act; her alcohol abuse did take its toll. Claire keeps herself healthy.”

“I suppose but it didn’t stop me from thinking about it.”

“Death of a family member always makes you think.”

“Mom’s only eighteen years older than I am,” John deadpanned.

“John Anderson, stop it! You’re going to live to be a hundred and I’m going to be right there with you,” Bobby said with conviction. He couldn’t bear hearing the love of his life talk about death. He reached out to take John’s hand.

“All right, you win, I live to be one hundred.” John smiled as he gave Bobby’s hand a squeeze. “Brian’s going to need us, all of us. Our needs may have to take a back seat for a while. Are you all right with that?”

“I’m fine. As long as I know you love me, I’ll be fine. Just try not to stay away for too long. I don’t sleep well without you.”

John pulled over into a parking space close to the front of Brian’s building. He turned off the car then turned in his seat, releasing his seatbelt at the same time. As Bobby released his own seatbelt John took him into his arms.

“I love you,” John murmured into the red-head’s hair as he kissed him senseless. “For as long as I live and beyond, I will always love you.” The lovers hung on to each other for a few minutes.

“We should get up there,” Bobby whispered after a while. He felt John nod in his arms. “I love you, John Anderson, for as long as I live and beyond.” Bobby kissed John then they got out of the Navigator to go up to the loft.

Justin put away the leftovers in the refrigerator. “Do you want a drink?” Justin asked Brian.

“Water.”

“You sure?”

“Yeah. I think I’ve had enough alcohol, don’t you?” Brian asked as Justin handed him a bottle of water. Brian twisted off the cap to take a good long drink.

“No one’s accusing you, you know.”

“I know but it’s been a long time since I’ve felt the need to drown myself in booze. I don’t intend to use Joan’s death as an excuse to resurrect my former pain management techniques.” Brian watched Justin’s face; the relief was almost instant.

“Brian,” Justin said with almost a sob. Brian stood in the middle of the floor, his arms opened wide. Justin went into them immediately; he couldn’t help his tears. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered.

“For what, Sunshine?”

“For everything. For Joan’s loss, for being afraid that you’d get drunk and do something stupid, for not trusting the man you’ve become. I’m just so sorry.”

“No need to be sorry. We’ve been living a charmed life. I imagine you’re not the only one with that opinion of me. And who knows, if I didn’t have you, Gus and the Squirt with me, getting drunk and having a trick suck me off would probably be just what I’d do.”

“You really don’t want to?” Justin asked, moist blue eyes looking up into the clear hazel eyes of his spouse.

“No, Sunshine. My life is complete with you and our family. Tricks and excessive abuses of drugs and alcohol have no place in my life. I promise you.” Brian kissed Justin, pouring his heart and soul into his kiss. They broke apart when they heard the sound of the loft door sliding back.

“Get a room,” Bobby teased his in-laws. Bobby and John kept walking into the loft until they were right next to Brian and Justin. In a wave of emotion, they joined them in a group hug. John bussed his brother’s head and gave Justin a peck on the cheek.

“Are you all right?” John asked Brian.

“Truthfully?” John nodded. “Not really. I think old Joanie had a feeling something was happening to her but she neglected to fill me in. If I thought cursing and tearing up the place would do any good, I would. But that would only succeed in making a mess of my loft and piss me off even more. I happen to like this old furniture.”

“It still looks pretty good to me,” Justin commented as he looked around the still impeccable loft with its white Italian leather furniture and gleaming stainless steel appliances.

“That’s because it’s fucking expensive and the best quality. With care it should last until our grandchildren jump all over it,” Brian said with a smirk. “I just wish I had been better prepared.”

“You’re never prepared for this kind of loss,” John murmured. Brian searched the eyes that mirrored his own.

“Claire’s healthy as a horse. She’s going nowhere in a hurry,” Brian assured his brother.

“I know but I can’t help thinking about it,” John admitted. Just then Bobby yawned and rolled his shoulders. The men could hear his joints popping. “You okay?” John asked his spouse.

“Yeah, just tired, it’s been a long day. I guess I’m feeling it,” Bobby admitted.

“Then come on, old man,” John teased. Let’s get ready for bed.”

Brian let John and Bobby shower first while he and Justin made up the futon cushion. They got the extra duvet and pillows to make a cuddly warm nest for John and Bobby.

“Oh man, that looks like heaven,” John said as he toweled off his hair, standing over their made up bed.

In borrowed sweats pants, John and Bobby slipped in between the sheets then covered themselves with the thick duvet.

“Oh yeah,” Bobby murmured appreciatively as he cuddled close to John. John wrapped his long limbs around his spouse then they fell blissfully into a deep sleep.

*****

“Are they asleep?” Brian asked as he followed Justin into the alcove to check on John and Bobby. Brian and Justin shared their own shower while John and Bobby settled in for the night.

“Out like the proverbial light,” Justin replied as he dried off his blond mane. He looked upon his in-laws fondly. They were his foundation. He could depend on them as readily as he depended on Brian. “They were really tired.”

“Yeah,” Brian whispered. “Come on, let’s follow their example. I’m beat.”

 

Justin followed Brian into the bedroom, shedding their towels along the way. Brian slid into the big loft bed, holding up the blanket. Justin crawled in and snuggled into Brian’s arms. Within moments all that could be heard were the gentle snores of four exhausted men fast asleep.

Aftermath

Chapter 3

“Gamma Jenn?”

“Good morning, sweetheart,” Jennifer replied to the little girl who had just walked into her kitchen. “You’re up early.”

“Where are my daddies?”

“They’re at the loft.”

“I want them.”

“They’ll be here to pick you up soon.”

Bree frowned. “I thought they’d come get me last night.”

“Your Dada wasn’t feeling so good after … the funeral.”

“Is he going to die too?” Bree asked with tears in her eyes.

“My goodness, no! Come here, sweetheart,” Jenn said. Bree walked towards her grandmother, still holding her grey bunny. She refused to let go of her bunny ever since her fathers had told her about her Gamma Joan. Jennifer pulled her into a fierce hug. “Your daddies will be fine. They’re just sad because Grandma Joan is … gone.”

“You promise they’re all right?” Bree asked looking up into Jennifer’s eyes.

“I promise you they’re all right.”

“Why didn’t they want me with them?” Bree wanted to know. She didn’t like being sent away, even if it was with her Gus.

“They thought you would be … tired, dealing with all the people that were at the funeral. I know they were both very tired.”

“I cried before I went to sleep,” Bree confessed when Jennifer released her.

“It’s okay to cry when someone dies,” Jennifer assured her. She stirred what she was cooking on the stove.

“Do you think my daddies cried?”

“I think that’s very possible.”

“Oh,” Bree said. That seemed to satisfy the little girl.

“Are you hungry?”

Bree nodded her head. She wasn’t sure if she should be hungry, but she knew she was.

“I made you some porridge,” Jennifer said. “I know it won’t be quite up to Hudson’s standards, but I thought you might like it. It’s kind of nippy out today.”

“Does it have raisins?” Bree asked standing on her tippy toes to try to see into the pot.

“Yes it does, and I added nuts and some maple syrup.”

“Oh.”

“This was your Daddy’s favorite when he was a little boy.”

“He makes me porridge at home,” Bree said sadly. “Am I going home?”

“Of course you are,” Jennifer said firmly. “Your daddies will come get you later this morning.”

“I’ll be late for school,” Bree noted as she looked at the clock in the kitchen.

“The school will understand when your daddies explain what’s happened.”

Bree stared at her grandmother who was dishing her up a bowl of porridge. “Are you going to die too, Gamma Jenn?” Bree asked.

“Not anytime soon, I hope,” Jennifer replied trying to keep her voice light.

“That’s good.”

“Yes it is good. Here’s your porridge, but be careful, it’s hot.”

“’Kay.”

Jennifer sat down at the kitchen table with her granddaughter. Bree took a little spoonful of her porridge blew on it and then tasted tentatively.

“Good,” Bree said.

“I’m glad you like it, sweetheart.”

“Is Gus going back to school today?”

“Yes, he will be when he gets up.”

“Should we wake him up?”

“He was tired too, so I thought I’d let him sleep as long as he wants.”

Bree nodded. That sounded like a good idea. “Gamma Jenn?”

“Yes, dear.”

“Why did Gamma Joan die?”

“I don’t know for sure, but she did have trouble with her heart, so that may have been why.”

“My Dada said she was old and tired.”

Jennifer thought that didn’t sound like a very good explanation. “Your Grandma Joan was getting elderly,” Jennifer conceded.

“Is that why she had gray hair?”

“Yes, we get gray hair as we get older.”

“Your hair is pretty.”

Jennifer smiled. “I’m not as old as your Grandma Joan, and I have to admit that I color my hair.”

“It looks nice,” Bree replied.

“Thanks.”

“Would it be gray if you didn’t color it?”

“I’m sure it would.”

“But you won’t die, will you?” Bree asked with concern.

“No, sweetheart, I told you that I’m fine. Eventually everyone does die though.”

“My daddies?” Bree asked with worried eyes.

“Even your daddies, but not for a very, very long time.”

“Good,” Bree stated emphatically. “I need my daddies. I don’t want anything to happen to them.”

“You don’t need to worry. They’re fine.”

“Good.”

At that moment Gus and Seth came into the kitchen.

“There’s my short stuff,” Gus said with a big smile. “You’re up early.”

“Gamma Jenn made me porridge. You should have some too,” Bree informed her brother as she hugged Gus when he bent down to kiss her.

“I’d love some,” Gus said.

“Coming right up,” Jennifer said getting out bowls for Gus and Seth. She dished up the porridge for each of them.

“Aren’t you having any, my dear?” Seth asked as he poured himself a coffee.

“I had some toast while I was cooking the porridge,” Jennifer said. She gave a bowl to each of the men.

“Are you leaving soon, Gus?” Bree asked.

Gus hesitated. He knew how Bree usually reacted when he had to leave his sister. “I’m afraid I have to,” he said hoping Bree wouldn’t make a fuss.

“Gamma Jenn told me you had to go back,” Bree admitted. “I’ll miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too,” Gus responded. He was surprised that Bree seemed so calm.

“Bree’s been asking a lot of questions about what happened to her grandmother,” Jennifer said. “I think she’s beginning to understand.”

“That’s good,” Gus said.

“And she’s growing up,” Jennifer added, earning a smile from her granddaughter.

The doorbell rang at that moment.

“That must be your daddies,” Seth said.

“Yay!” Bree crowed as she practically leapt off the chair and raced to the front door. “Daddy! Dada!” she screeched as she yanked the door open.

“Hi, sweetheart,” Justin replied picking her up and giving her a big hug.

Bree kissed his face, but then looked around uncertainly. “Where’s Dada?”

“He’s staying in Pittsburgh for a couple of days with Uncle John. You’re coming home with me.”

“But … I want Dada.”

“I know, but he has some things to do for Grandma Joan’s house. He wants to get all the loose ends tied up.”

“But he’s okay?” Bree asked.

“He’s fine,” Justin said wishing he could be totally sure of that. At least John would be with him.

Bree seemed to believe her father. “Gamma Jenn made me porridge.”

“Is it as good as Hudson’s?” Justin asked. That was their rating scale for porridge.

“It’s almost as good as Hudson’s and just as good as yours, Daddy.”

“Well, who do you think taught me how to make it?”

“Gamma Jenn?” Bree asked.

Justin chuckled and nodded. He kissed Bree’s cheek. “Are you ready to go home?” Bree nodded. “Go get dressed and we’ll be off,” Justin said. Bree ran upstairs to get dressed.

“How was she?” Justin asked his mother who had joined them in the front hall.

“She has lots of questions, and she needs reassurance that everybody else isn’t going to die, but otherwise she seems fine.”

Justin nodded. “Then I guess it’s time to go home.”

After some juggling of cars, it was decided that Bobby, Justin and Bree would go home in the Navigator. John arranged for a company truck so that he could make his rounds of his Pittsburgh construction sites. Brian had his trusty Jeep to get around in.

Bobby and Justin had barely made it one block away from Jenn’s condo when Bree began to sniffle then cry.

“Bobby, pull over,” Justin quietly requested.

“What’s wrong, sweetheart?” Justin asked Bree.

“I want my Dada,” Bree cried softly. In spite of assurances that her elder father was fine, Bree needed to see Brian in person.

“Bri, where are you?” Justin said into his cell phone.

“At Kinnetik. Why?”

“Bree really needs to see you. I think she thinks you’re sick or dying,” Justin whispered.

“Maybe I’ve been going about this the wrong way,” Brian mumbled more to himself than to Justin. “Bring her to the office,” Brian said clearly.

“We’ll be right there,” Justin said. Justin gave Bobby a look and without saying a word, Bobby got back on the road heading for Kinnetik.

“Dada!” Bree screeched as she ran into the old bathhouse and spied her father coming out of his office into the main room. Brian knelt down as Bree flung herself into his arms. She burst into tears.

“Come on, Squirt, let’s go for a walk,” Brian whispered into Bree’s ear as he carried her outside into the alley.

*****

“Well, shit,” John deadpanned as he looked into the hole in the ground. A backhoe was rumbling away in the background, its driver awaiting orders.

“My words exactly,” Gordon said as he stood at the edge of the hole looking at the same things that caught John’s eye.

“We have to call the authorities,” John commented.

“I figured,” Gordon said as he waved his cell phone. “They’ll be here soon.”

“I better alert the mayor’s office. They were hoping we’d have a block of one family houses up before winter,” John said.

“If it’s a crime scene, we might make it. If it’s a long lost burial site...”

“Yeah, I know,” John waved his hands in frustration. As the wail of police cars got closer, John and Gordon took out their plans for an alternative construction site.

*****

Brian sat on one of the rainbow painted benches that lined Liberty Avenue. Bree sat on his lap. The October sun was warm but there was a hint of Fall in the air. A cool breeze wafted by making Bree shiver. Brian took off his sport coat and draped it around his daughter.

“Are you going to die?” Bree asked in a tiny voice.

“We all die eventually,” Brian answered. This was not what Bree wanted to hear. “Briana, this is something I can’t promise you. Life sometimes doesn’t obey our rules but I can promise you that I try to eat healthy food. I exercise regularly and I go to the doctor for my check ups. So far the doctor says I’m very healthy.”

“But Gamma Joan was healthy.”

“Not really. Her heart wasn’t in the best shape and before she got to know you and Gus, she abused alcohol. Do you know what that means?” Bree nodded her head. “You know when Daddy and I have a beer or a glass of wine?” Bree nodded her head, her ponytail swung back and forth. “How many glasses do you see us having?”

“One or two,” Bree said after she thought about it. Brian once let her smell a glass of beer. Bree didn’t like it, wrinkling up her nose in disgust.

“Well, my mother used to drink much more than one or two glasses of wine every day. Have you learned about that in school?”

“Too much alcohol can hurt your liver and your brain,” Bree said. “We learned that in health class. The teacher said that drugs can do that too!”

“She’s right. Grandma wasn’t always very happy, and sometimes when someone isn’t very happy they turn to drugs or alcohol to make them forget why they’re sad. But then you came along and helped to make grandma very, very happy. She stopped abusing alcohol, began to eat right and to follow the advice of her doctors. Bree, you and Gus made Joan so happy that she took better care of herself. But some things couldn’t get better. The damage to her heart and liver was extensive. Do you know what that means?”

“It means that there was too much damage,” Bree said seriously. “We learned that some damage is irr...irra...”

“Irreversible. That’s right.” Brian stopped talking. He was watching several same sex couples quietly walking hand in hand down Liberty. It was one of the few places where they could without fear. Bree sat quietly on her father’s lap, thinking about what they had discussed.

“Dada, Gamma Jenn said she was afraid that you’d do something stupid.”

“Did she now?” Brian smirked, he wasn’t surprised. He knew a lot of his family was waiting for Brian to do something stupid. They’d have a long wait.

“What did she mean?”

“Bree, you’re only eight but we both know how smart you are,” Brian said as he looked into her bright violet blue eyes.

Bree nodded. Bree knew she was smart. She also knew that there were lots of things that she didn’t know, but she almost never forgot things that she was taught or read.

“When I was younger I wasn’t very happy and I did some things that I probably shouldn’t have.” Bree’s eyes grew very wide. “It took a few years, but after I met your father and our relationship grew...” Brian smiled to himself. Relationship.

“What is it, Dada?” Bree noticed the change of expression on her father’s face.

“When I was young and stupid I never believed in relationships.”

“But now you do?”

“Yes. That was one of the many things I learned from your father. I learned about love and relationships and about being a good person.”

“But you are a good person, Dada!” Bree said as she wrapped her little arms around Brian’s neck. “You are a very good person and you’re my Dada.”

“Thank you, Squirt.” Brian smiled, a beautiful smile at his most precious daughter then pecked her little nose. “I haven’t done anything stupid in a long, long time. And I had stopped before I did any permanent damage.”

“Not like Gamma Joan,” Bree said sadly.

“No, but you know what? Because of you and Gus, Gamma Joan stopped doing stupid things so that she could spend the best time of her life with you and with us. You and Gus made her the happiest person ever.”

“And you and Daddy? Did you make her happy?”

“Yeah, I think I did. She loved spending time with us at the lane. She especially loved the time we spent in New York together and she was very proud that you wanted to learn about your heritage and culture. She loved being involved with our whole family.”

“You mean our cwazy wittle family?” Bree asked using her father’s term. Brian laughed for the first time in days.

“Oh, yeah, our cwazy wittle family.” He hugged the little girl hard. “We did the most important stuff yesterday to honor Joan and her memory. We gave her a good send off but now it’s time for you to go back to school, to continue to learn just like me and Daddy and Joan want you to do.”

“But why can’t you come home with us?’ Bree’s face fell.

“Because there’s some stuff that I need to take care of for Joan and instead of driving back and forth for the next few days, it’ll be easier for me to stay here. Uncle John is going to stay with me, and he won’t let me do anything stupid.”

“Oh. I thought he has to work too. That’s why he wants to stay.”

“Well, yes, he and Gordon are working on a big project but that’s just an excuse. He really wants to take care of me.”

“Like Gus and Patrick take care of me cause they’re older? And Gus is my big brother?”

“Yup. Uncle John is my big brother and he likes to take care of me. He doesn’t think I know but I do. It’ll be our secret, okay?” Brian gave Bree a sly smile. She giggled and nodded, joining her father in the conspiracy. “It’ll be easier to get my business done faster if I stay here for a few days rather than doing everything over the phone.”

Brian was talking to Bree like she was much older and Bree seemed to understand.

“Okay, Dada. I’ll go back to school and learn. I miss Ashley,” Bree said, crisis almost all over. “But I’m gonna miss you.” Bree hugged her Dada.

“I’m going to miss you too but I’ll talk to you every day. And I wonÂ’t stay away too long. I like our nice quiet lane. Besides, Uncle John snores,” Brian whispered, making Bree laugh. “Come on, we better get back. Your daddy and Uncle Bobby are probably getting mad at me.” Brian picked up Bree to carry her back to Kinnetik.

“There you are!” Justin called out as Bree and Brian walked into Kinnetik. Justin was visiting with several of the artists and employees. Bobby was talking business with Ted. Justin took Bree from Brian then kissed Brian over Bree’s shoulder.

“Is everything okay?” Justin asked Brian.

“We’re good. Bree and I had a heart to heart talk and she understands why I have to stay here for a few days and why it’s very important for her to go back home and back to school. Besides, she misses Ashley.”

“Ashley. Yes, I’m sure Ashley misses you too.” Justin put Bree down and asked her to go get Bobby. As soon as she scurried off Justin turned to Brian. “What happened?”

“Do you know we have a very smart daughter?” Brian asked, circumventing Justin’s question.

“Yes, I know,” Justin replied with a smile then he gave Brian a hug.

“I told her the truth, Sunshine,” Brian murmured as he held onto his spouse. “I told her that Joan abused the booze and that it hurt her body. I also told her that because of Bree and Gus, Joan stopped drinking to excess and embraced life. That because of her, Joan was happy. And that you’ve made me happy. So happy that I stopped doing stupid things that could hurt my body.”

“Did she understand?”

“I think so. She seemed calmer. I also told her that I know why John is staying with me.”

“You figured it out, huh?” Justin snickered.

“Yeah. Took me a while but I did. I promise, I’ll get Joan’s affairs straightened out then I’ll come home,” Brian said kissing Justin’s head then his lips, not caring that most of Kinnetik was watching.

“Promise?” Justin asked sounding a lot like Bree.

 

“Promise, and I don’t lie,” Brian assured his spouse. Justin rounded up his daughter and his brother-in-law then left for Edna’s Treasures.

Aftermath

Chapter 4

It was lunchtime when Bobby pulled into Edna’s Treasures Lane. He stopped at the house and they all got out.

“Am I going to school, Daddy?” Bree asked.

“Do you want to or would you rather wait until tomorrow?” Justin asked.

“I’d rather stay with you, but I want to see Ashley,” Bree said. She was torn.

“Maybe we can have the best of both worlds,” Bobby suggested. “What if you stay home with your daddy and he could call Ashley’s mother, and I could pick her up after school when I get Patrick. I could bring her here for dinner.”

“That’s a great idea,” Justin said with a smile. “What do you think, Bree?”

Bree thought for a moment and then nodded her head. She clutched grey bunny to her chest as they all headed for the house.

*****

“Kinney,” Brian said as he answered his cell phone. He was working at Kinnetik, keeping his mind busy and accomplishing some good work on an ad campaign that the company had been recently hired to create.

“How are you?” a worried Michael asked.

“I’m … okay.”

“I was glad you didn’t arrive drunk at my door last night.”

Brian thought about the night of Jack’s funeral and how he had needed Michael so much that night. This time had been different though. “I really miss Mom,” Brian admitted. “But we had come to terms with things. That never happened with Jack. I think that’s the difference.”

“I’m glad you and Joan were able to settle your differences,” Michael replied sincerely.

“Bree had a lot to do with that.”

“How is she?”

“Worried that I might die.”

“Jesus…”

“I think I reassured her,” Brian said quickly. He didn’t want Michael worrying when he should still be concentrating on getting well.

“Good. Ben and I are going back to the lane today. I’ll be there if you need me.”

“Thanks, I know you will,” Brian said before cutting the connection.

*****

“Kinney,” Brian said once again.

“It’s Lindsay. I was wondering how you were doing.”

“Not bad.”

“That’s good, I guess,” Lindsay said not sure if she believed him.

“How are the girls?” Brian asked not deigning to answer her implied doubt about his condition.

“They’re okay. They miss Joan.”

“Oddly,” Brian mused, “I think a lot of people will miss her. Who would have thought…?”

“She became an important part of the family.”

“Yes she did.”

“You’re going to be okay?”

“I’m planning on it.”

“Good.”

Brian cut the connection.

*****

“Kinney.”

“How the hell are you, and don’t tell me you’ve been taking up your old ways.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it, Deb.”

“Good.”

“Thanks for all the food … and everything you did at Joan’s.”

“Not a problem. It was the least I could do for old Joanie.”

“Joan would have been pleased with it all.”

“Yes she would, and you should be proud of what you and she were able to accomplish.”

“Accomplish?” Brian asked surprised at the choice of that word.

“You and Joan were able to create a happy family. That’s no mean feat when you consider where you both started from.”

“Yeah, I guess that is something to be proud of.”

“Very proud.”

“If only Claire could stop wailing long enough to make some decisions,” Brian said with a sigh.

“The house?”

“She doesn’t want it, but I can’t get her to agree to sell it.”

“She’ll come around.”

“I doubt it.”

“Don’t doubt yourself, Brian. You did good so far.”

“Thanks.”

“Talk to you soon, and hang tough.”

Brian laughed. “I will,” he said as he set the phone down.

*****

“Kinney,” Brian said answering his phone with a big sigh. It would undoubtedly be another one of his friends checking up on him.

“Brian, it’s Jennifer.”

“Mother Taylor.”

“That’s Harris to you.”

“Old habits die hard.”

“I hope you’re not indulging in any of those old habits of yours.”

“Nary a one,” Brian replied. He was almost proud of that fact, but so many people seemed to doubt him. “I don’t know why everyone thinks I will revert to my old pain management techniques.”

Jennifer immediately regretted what she had just said. She knew Brian had changed, but there was still a little grain of worry about what he might do when his emotions were so raw. “We don’t think you will do … any of those things,” she explained. “We’re praying you won’t, but we all know how hard this must be for you,” Jennifer added.

“I’m okay.”

“But Bree isn’t.”

“What do you mean?”

“She’s really worried about other family members dying on her.”

“I know,” Brian said with relief since he had already dealt with that problem. “Justin brought her here before they went back to Edna’s Treasures. She needed to see with her own eyes that I was all right.”

“That’s good.”

“We had a long talk and I think she understands. She’s a smart little girl.”

“Yes she is. That’s really what I called for. I thought you should know how she was feeling.”

“Thanks for worrying about her.”

“She’s my granddaughter. I love her.”

“She loves you too.”

“But she’s missing the grandmother that’s gone.”

Brian rubbed his forehead. All this talk about Joan was starting to get to him. He decided to change the subject. “If I can get Claire to come to her senses and agree to sell Joan’s house, would you look after that for me?”

“Of course … if that’s what you want.” Jennifer was pleased that Brian wanted her to be part of this.

“It’s what I want.”

“Then consider it done.”

“Thanks.” Brian cut the connection. Then immediately hit number one on his speed dial. “Sunshine,” he said.

“Is everything all right?”

“Yes, aside from all the concerned phone calls that I have been fielding all day.”

“The family?”

“The family. Everything okay on your end?”

“Yes, I decided to keep Bree home for the rest of the day. Ashley’s coming over after school.”

“Bree will like that.”

“She can hardly wait.”

“Tell her I love her.”

“Why don’t you tell her? She’s pulling on my arm as we speak.”

Brian chuckled. He could just picture his little princess yanking on Justin’s arm. “Put her on.”

“Dada!” Bree yelled.

Brian took the phone away from his ear. “I’m here.”

“I love you, Dada, and Ashley’s coming over and Daddy and me painted.”

“That’s good, Squirt.”

“Are you coming home?”

“In a day or two.”

“’Kay, Dada. I love you.”

“Love you more,” Brian said before he heard Justin’s voice.

“Bobby just drove up with Ashley,” Justin informed his husband.

“That should make the Squirt happy.”

“It will. I love you too, and stay strong.”

“Or as Debbie so aptly put it, ‘Hang tough.’”

“That too,” Justin said with a laugh. They each ended the call feeling a little better.

*****

It was a couple days later when Brian joined a somewhat calmer Claire at Joan’s attorney’s office. Brian pecked his sister on the cheek then held open the door for her. As they entered the lawyer’s inner office, the waterworks started up again.

“Claire, can’t you put a sock in it?” Brian growled. He was just as broken up about his mother’s death but he didn’t go around whining and sniveling about it all the time.

“Just because you’re heartless, doesn’t mean I have to be,” Claire said. “I miss my mother.”

“Don’t you think I miss her,” Brian said as he grabbed Claire’s arm then glared at her. “She was my fucking mother too,” he growled. He leaned in close and tightly held onto her arm. “I waited over forty years to have a real mother, Claire, and now after only a few years with her, she’s gone. If I had nothing better to do, I’d go around wailing like a banshee too, but decisions have to be made and life goes on. Now pull yourself together and let’s get through this fucking shit!”

Claire took her brother seriously and the tears ceased almost immediately. Brian handed his sister a tissue then they walked into the office together.

*****

“So it’s now an archeological site,” John explained to the Mayor. The Mayor sighed.

“At least it’s not a crime scene,” Gordon added. The Pittsburgh Archeological Society had been called in to view the construction site just after the Pittsburgh PD pathologist determined that the bones in the ground were old. Very, very old.

“But it also means that the whole area will have to be excavated making it unavailable for the housing project,” John said. “From the plans your Housing Commissioner has laid out, we do have several alternatives. If we can get on them quickly enough and...”

“If you don’t uncover any more old bones,” the Mayor interjected.

“We should have some homes built before severe winter weather sets in,” John stated with confidence. Gordon and the Mayor nodded with relieved smiles.

“I do have one concern,” the Mayor began. “One of the new homes was earmarked for the Jason Kemp Center,” the Mayor explained.

“Why does the Drop In Center need a house?” Gordon asked.

“Apparently, Mr. Montgomery feels that some of his ‘rescuees’ are sorely lacking life skills.”

“What does that mean?” John asked.

“Honestly, I’m not sure,” the Mayor replied. “But since the inception of the Center, crime, prostitution, and underage STDs have been drastically reduced in that part of town and in the city overall. Some of his older ‘graduates’ have started smaller programs in other areas of the city with links back to Hunter. He’s found a way to get to these kids. They know his history and they trust him. They see first hand that there are options and hope. I don’t want to disappoint him.”

John and Gordon exchanged looks.

“We’ll make the house for the Center our first priority,” John assured the Mayor. “I’ll speak to Hunter today to see if he has something special in mind for the house.”

The Mayor was satisfied that his reclamation project would go on as scheduled.

*****

“Well, that’s just about it,” Joan’s lawyer said. “She didn’t leave much. Mrs. Kinney bequeathed all of her jewelry to you,” the lawyer indicated Claire. “Except for one small gold crucifix.” The lawyer held up a picture of the piece. “She wanted this to go to Briana. Claire, as you know gets first refusal on the house. Mrs. Kinney also stated that if you decided to sell the house, the proceeds minus any taxes would go to Claire.”

Claire nodded, smiling, knowing that her mother had left practically everything to her. Then she frowned.

“What about Brian? Did my mother leave anything for him?”

Brian stayed quiet. There was nothing material he wanted. Although he was devastated from his mother’s loss, and angry that they had had very little time together, he was very grateful to the gods for the time that they did get to share. Especially the time Joan shared with Bree and Gus.

“About a week before your mother’s death, I did receive a call from her stating that there were some personal papers, postcards, letters and documents that she and Briana were looking over. Apparently, Justin had helped Joan to organize these mementos.”

Brian nodded, confirming what the attorney had said.

“What about them? Were they the papers in that big old cardboard box that she kept in the back of her closet?” Claire asked her brother.

“I think so. Joan had asked Justin to get them out of the closet for her. They were working on them for weeks. Bree has a school project about cultures and her heritage,” Brian said with a shrug.

The attorney smiled. Apparently he too had a school aged child who was working on a similar project.

“When I was a kid, she caught me playing in her closet. I looked through the box but the papers were dusty and smelled funny. I sneezed a lot then put them all back in the box. It’s fine with me if mom gave them to Bree.”

The lawyer made some notations on his pad and on some forms he had Brian and Claire sign.

“When you decide what you’d like to do with the house, let me know. Joan owned the property and was up to date with her property taxes. There’s no rush to make any kind of decisions on it.”

“I’ll discuss it with my husband but we live in a nice condo. I don’t want to live in a house again and be responsible for lawns and shoveling sidewalks and stuff like that. And I don’t think Brian wants the house either.” Claire felt confident to speak for her younger brother.

“Either way, talk it over with your family and let me know what you decide.”

Brian knew a dismissal when he heard it. There was nothing earth shattering about the will. It was pretty basic and unbeknownst to Claire, Joan had discussed the contents of her will with Brian a long time ago. The lawyer was someone Bobby had recommended so Brian knew that everything was fair.

Brian led Claire out of the office and they went their separate ways.

*****

John slid the loft door shut with a bang. Brian looked up from his computer.

“What’s eating your ass?” Brian asked from behind the monitor. He had come home after the meeting with the lawyer, changed into his faded jeans and wifebeater, got himself a beer then began doing some work on the computer.

“Our project hit a major wall the other day,” John began as he got his own beer from the fridge, unscrewed the cap and took a good swig. “We can work around it but the delay may affect Hunter and his kids.” Brian’s brow arched. “You heard me talk about the reclamation project, right?”

Brian nodded. “Justin was dogging you around Pittsburgh sketching your men and looking at old buildings for a while, right?”

“Yes. He’s interested in some of the old buildings that we’re renovating,” John explained. Brian made a ‘get to the point’ motion with his hand. John glared then got to the point. “Part of the plan is to make blocks of affordable housing, but nice housing that fits into the scheme of the neighborhood.”

“So no ultramodern highrises cutting off the view of the river from the little people?” Brian snarked.

“Something like that, but we ran into a snag. Bottom line, I learned from the Mayor that Hunter wanted one of the houses.”

“Hunter? What the fuck does he want a house for? I thought he and Nick liked it downstairs.”

“Not for them,” John said as if talking to a two year old. “For the Center.”

“Okay. What does the Center want with a house?’

“That’s what I wanted to know so I called Hunter. He feels that a lot of his kids need some place where they can transition from their old life back to a normal life. Some of these kids never had a normal life.”

“Meaning what?”

“Doing laundry, cooking a meal, paying bills. Normal everyday things that we take for granted. Sure they keep their cot tidy and the center’s bathroom and pantry area clean but that’s not caring for a home.”

“Like a halfway house.”

“Yeah. Nothing fancy. An ordinary home in an ordinary neighborhood. But someplace where they can learn responsibility. Learn to mow a lawn, rake leaves, things like that.”

Brian began to smile.

“What?”

“Big bro, I think I have the answer to your prayers.”

An hour later, there was one happy Kinney sister and two happy Kinney brothers. Plus one very happy Master of Social Work.

“You know the plumbing in that old house won’t take much abuse. It was just old Joanie for years,” Brian quipped as he and John put together a simple supper out of all the leftovers and care packages that were in the refrigerator and freezer.

“Well, Hunter does want his kids to learn about real life. What better than learning how to unstuff a stopped up toilet,” John mumbled around a dinner roll. “Gordon and I will modernize the place. Maybe finish off the basement and add another story. The house has to come up to code depending on the number of occupants. Joan had mentioned to me that she had always wanted to do a whole house makeover, but she was happy with what we did to it.”

“She was very happy with it. She said you made it more comfortable for her,” Brian said wistfully. “Thank you, big bro.”

“Anytime. We Kinneys have to stick together,” John smiled.

“Yeah.”

“Bri, are you ready to go home? Bobby said Beau’s been sneaking into your closet. He pulled out one of your boots.”

“Not my Pradas?” Brian asked in mock horror then snickered. John put a hand on Brian’s shoulder.

“I’m sorry to inform you that Beau has taken your favorite Prada boots and is holding them hostage until you’ve been returned to the old homestead,” John said with a straight face.

“Okay, I surrender. I’m ready to go home.”

“Good. Now eat!” John pointed to Brian’s almost full plate.

Brian ate.

Aftermath

Chapter 5

The school bell had rung and Bree was heading outside to wait for whoever was picking her up today. She wanted it to be her Dada, but he still hadn’t come back from Pittsburgh. She tried not to worry, but she missed him so much, and it wasn’t good that he was not there with her and her daddy.

With a heavy heart Bree pushed the door open and exited the school. She scanned the parking lot looking for her Dada’s Jeep, but there was no sign of it. There was no sign of any of the familiar vehicles that usually picked her up. She frowned wondering if this was a day she was supposed to take the school bus and nobody had told her.

She looked around for Patrick. He would know what was what. She didn’t see him or any of the kids he usually hung around with. Patrick’s class must not have been dismissed yet.

Suddenly Bree felt so alone. She wanted her Dada and her grey bunny and her Gamma Joan. She could feel tears behind her eyes threatening to come out. Blinking hard, she tried to keep them at bay.

“Bree?”

“Huh?”

“You okay?” Ashley asked.

Bree had been feeling so sorry for herself that she hadn’t heard her best friend come up to her. “Yeah, I guess.”

“You look sad.”

“I was hoping my Dada would pick me up today, but nobody’s here.”

“My mommy will take you home if you want to wait for her,” Ashley offered.

Bree shook her head. “I want my Dada,” she said sadly.

“I hope he comes home soon,” Ashley said. She threw her arms around her best friend and hugged her tight.

“Everything’s all screwed up,” Bree gulped as the tears started down her face. “Ever since Gamma Joan … died.”

“I know. I’m sorry,” Ashley said sincerely.

“Why did my Gamma hafta die?” Bree asked.

“I don’t know.”

“Me either.”

“Bree?”

“Huh?” Bree turned around to see her Uncle Bobby standing next to them. “Unca Bobby!” Bree cried and threw herself into his arms.

“Easy, sweetheart, what’s the matter?”

“She misses her grandma,” Ashley supplied when Bree did not reply immediately.

Bobby could feel Bree nodding her head in agreement against his chest as he held her. “We all miss her,” he said gently. “But you and your grandma had a very special relationship.”

Bree leaned back so she could look up at her uncle. Her big violet eyes were full of tears. “I love her so much. Why did she hafta go?”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t leave you in a million years if she had a choice,” Bobby said gently. “But her heart just wasn’t up to going on. She loved you very much.”

“I want my Dada,” Bree begged.

“He’s coming home. In fact he might be there when we get home.”

“Really?” Bree asked, the tears in her eyes glistening in the sunlight.

“Really! He called to say he was coming.”

“That’s good, Bree,” Ashley contributed. “I hope you feel better tomorrow.”

“Me too,” Bree said giving her friend one more hug before following Bobby to the car where Patrick was now waiting for them.

“You okay, Bree?” Patrick asked as they got settled in the car. Patrick decided to sit in the backseat with Bree so he could hold her hand all the way home.

Bree shook her head in answer to the question, but she liked the feel of Patrick’s hand holding hers. Her heart was beating pretty fast as they neared the lane. She hoped her Dada would be there.

When they turned in through the gate to the lane, Bree strained forward hoping to see her Dada’s Jeep. It wasn’t there. She let out a weak sob and pulled her hand out of Patrick’s.

“He’ll be here soon,” Patrick promised. “Poppa said he was coming home.”

“No he won’t,” Bree protested. “He’s not coming home. He’s leaving us like Gamma Joan did.”

“Your Dada wouldn’t do that, Bree,” Patrick said trying to reassure his cousin and friend.

“Come on, Bree,” Bobby said. “Your Daddy has snacks ready, and your Dada will be here soon.”

“No he won’t,” Bree contradicted as she got out of the car. “He don’t love me no more.”

“Then who’s that?” Bobby asked as a familiar Jeep barreled up the lane.

“Dada!” Bree shrieked as Brian brought the Jeep to an abrupt halt near the house. Amid a cloud of pebbles and dust, Brian Kinney stepped out of the vehicle. “DADA!” Bree screamed at the top of her lungs. She propelled herself like a rocket towards the source of her sudden happiness. Arms enfolded her and held her tight as she whispered “Dada” one more time.

“Squirt,” Brian whispered back in response.

“I missed you so much,” Bree declared.

“I missed you too.”

“I didn’t think you were ever coming home,” Bree told her father. “I was scared.”

“I’ll always come home,” Brian promised.

“I love you.”

“Love you too, Squirt.”

“Can I have some of that love?” Justin’s voice said.

“Absolutely, Sunshine,” Brian replied, pulling his husband into a fierce hug while still holding onto Bree.

“Absolutely, Daddy,” Bree concurred. Her little face shone with a radiant Taylor smile made all the more poignant by the sparkling tears in her eyes.

“It’s so good to have you home,” Justin whispered.

“Yeah, good,” Bree agreed.

“I feel exactly the same,” Brian said and he meant that with every fiber of his being.

“Let’s go inside,” Justin said. He noted that Bobby, John and Patrick had disappeared into the house probably thinking that the Kinney-Taylor family needed some alone time and some privacy for their reunion. They probably wanted to have the same, since John had come home with Brian as well.

The Kinney-Taylor family walked toward the house, each man holding one of Bree’s hands. When Brian opened the door, Beau stood just inside with a Prada boot in his mouth. He looked up quizzically at Brian.

“Yes, Beau, I have returned,” Brian said trying not chuckle. “I heard that you had taken my boots hostage. Are you going to give them back?”

Beau dropped the boot and gave a woof of approval that his master had returned. Justin quickly grabbed the boot before Beau could change his mind.

“We tried to get them away from him,” Justin said as he handed the boot to Brian. “But every time we got near he would growl.”

“No shit!” Brian said shaking his head. He examined the boot. “Nary a tooth mark,” he observed.

“He didn’t seem to want to chew them,” Justin explained. “He just refused to let us have them.”

“Well, it looks like he got his way,” Brian chuckled.

“Dada, will you sit with me?” Bree asked. She wanted some more of her missing father’s attention.

“I think that could be arranged, Squirt.”

“You two go snuggle on a chaise in the sun porch,” Justin ordered earning a raised eyebrow from Brian. “I know you don’t like to think that you snuggle, but you do it all the time … and very well, I might add.”

Bree giggled. “Yeah, you snuggle good, Dada.”

“Thanks, I think,” Brian replied, but he couldn’t help but smile. He was very glad to be home.

“I’ll bring you both some snacks,” Justin said. “I made some of that savory cheese that you both liked.”

“Yum,” Bree said before she and her older father went to snuggle on the chaise.

They had just gotten comfortable when Beau appeared beside the chaise holding the other Prada boot.

“Is that a peace offering?” Brian asked.

Beau dropped the boot and gave a little woof.

“Thank you for not chewing them up,” Brian said scratching Beau’s ruff.

“He likes that, Dada,” Bree said as Beau’s mouth dropped open in pure enjoyment.

“Yes he does … almost as much as I like being home,” Brian added. Beau laid his big head on the edge of the chaise so that Brian could continue to pet him. All was right in the world.

*****

“Is she asleep?” Justin asked as Brian re-entered the sun porch, a couple of beers in his hand. He handed a bottle to Justin.

“Yes,” Brian replied as he shoved Justin’s hips over on the chaise then snuggled close. Justin had been quietly sketching while Brian spent time with Bree.

After dinner, Brian reviewed Bree’s homework with her, discussed how her culture project was coming along then helped Bree with her bath and hair, which she was quite capable of doing on her own. Then he sat with her as they looked through the albums Joan had given her and read her a bedtime story, which she was also very capable of doing. Brian tucked Bree into bed, grey bunny in her arms then laid down next to her until she fell asleep. He watched his little girl sleep for a while before joining his spouse in the porch.

Brian grabbed the afghan that Joan had made for them from the back of the chaise and threw it over Justin. “We’re going to have to turn on the heat soon,” Brian commented.

The rest of the cottage was still warm enough but as the days grew shorter and the season changed, the sun porch became chilly.

“She missed you.”

“I missed her...and you,” Brian murmured as he kissed Justin’s temple.

“She was convinced that something horrible had happened to you.”

“I know. I think the whole family was waiting for something ‘horrible’ to happen to me.”

“I have faith. The old Brian is gone,” Justin said with conviction.

“No, the old Brian is still here but he’s carefully controlled. I let him out when I’m negotiating a contract or making a pitch to a stubborn client. Then I tuck him away until he’s needed again.”

Justin didn’t know what to make of Brian’s admission. He had never heard Brian talk that way.

“Do you know what I find interesting as I get older?” Brian asked out of the blue. Justin shook his head. “Most of our family have stopped talking about me getting older.”

“What do you mean?”

“No one has mentioned the odd grey hairs I have.”

“Because they only make you sexier.”

“The crow’s feet?”

“They make you look distinguished.”

“And the fact that I’ll be turning fifty next year?” Brian chuckled as Justin sputtered into his beer bottle. “No, Sunshine, I haven’t overlooked it. Brian fucking Kinney, ex-stud and potential over the hill club boy is turning fifty. And I have you to thank.”

“What?” Justin asked, surprise written all over his face as he turned to look at Brian. “Thank me for what?”

“For giving me a reason to live until this ripe old age, and beyond. I have a beautiful family, including those crazy people in the Pitts. I have a brilliant son, a phenomenal daughter and a spouse who’s a household name and not because of his legendary ass,” Brian said with a straight face.

Justin glared at Brian for a second then broke out into laughter, giving Brian his best 100-watt smile.

“See?” Brian said as he grabbed both their beer bottles to put them out of harm’s way. He then wrapped his arms around Justin. “I have everything I could possibly want and I have you to thank for it.” Brian squeezed Justin then held him to his chest.

“Are you really all right?” Justin whispered some time later.

“I will be. I’m still angry at the gods for only giving me a few short years with the old bat but I’m grateful for them too.”

“I know. Joan became such an important part of our family. I’m going to miss her. She became one of our staunchest supporters.”

“That she did. Makes me believe that there really is a god.” Justin gave Brian a look. “Well, some sort of god,” Brian smirked.

“For a minute I thought you found religion.”

“The only religion I’ve found is fucking. I will worship your ass until my last breath.”

“Which won’t be for a very, very long time.”

“Amen, Sunshine.”

“Blasphemer.”

“Damn straight.”

“If you’re up to it, I could use a little worshiping right now.”

“I’m always up, Sunshine,” Brian quipped as he stood up and extended his hand to Justin. Justin took the proffered hand and stood.

“Why don’t you start the shower while I clean up? I’ll be in in a few minutes,” Justin said as he reached up on his toes to peck Brian’s lips. Brian nodded then turned to go.

“I love you,” Justin called after him.

“I know,” Brian said as he nonchalantly sauntered to their room.

*****

“Dada, do I hafta go to school today?” Bree asked her elder father at breakfast. She was understandably a little clingy.

“Yes, you have to go to school,” Brian replied with an arch of his brow. Her sad little pout and batting eyelashes were not working this morning.

“Okay,” she said with a put upon sigh.

“I’ll pick you guys up this afternoon,” Brian said by way of compromise.

“Yay!” Bree shouted then threw her arms around her father.

“Go get your bag. The bus will be here soon,” Brian said.

“Coffee,” Justin mumbled as he stumbled out of their room and into the kitchen which was alive with morning traffic.

“Good morning, Sunshine!” Brian grinned as he handed his partner a cup of liquid life.

“How come you’re so wide awake?” Justin grumbled as he took a sip of the piping hot nectar of the gods.

“Oh, maybe because I slept like a baby in my own bed after a night of hot passionate sex,” Brian said as his grin got wider. He chuckled as Justin batted away his roaming hands and lips.

“I’ve got morning breath. Worse, I’ve got morning and coffee breath,” Justin grumbled.

“I love your morning coffee breath. I love your rumpled bed head and your sleep creased face.”

“Thanks, I think,” Justin sat at the table and nibbled on a piece of toast. He and Brian tore up the sheets last night. For a man approaching fifty, Brian had more than enough energy to wear Justin out.

“Bye, Daddy!” Bree shouted as she ran past her father toward the front door. The school bus was just buzzed onto the lane.

“Bye, Uncle Bri, Uncle Jus!” Patrick called out as he was hot on her trail.

Brian watched the kids get on the bus, waved and then went back in the kitchen to buzz them out the gate.

“What’s his problem?” John asked Brian as John came into the kitchen and headed straight for the coffeepot.

“Youth, quick out of the gate but no staying power,” Brian teased. Justin flipped him the bird as he tried to find a comfortable position on his chair.

“Ah, the reunion,” John surmised. “Don’t feel bad, Justin. I got a bit of a workout myself,” John said with a satisfied grin. He and Brian clinked coffee mugs.

“Anymore coffee?” Bobby asked as he bounced into the room. He was dressed to the nines in his ‘court’ suit. He passed out kisses as John handed him a mug.

“Am I the only one that feels like shit warmed over?” Justin asked as he watched his peppy in-laws and spouse.

They all giggled making Justin glare his best attempt at a Kinney death glare.

“Aw, Sunshine,” Brian said gently as he put his arms around his exhausted Sunshine. “Justin, what have you been doing while John and I were in Pittsburgh?”

“I don’t know. Painting, looking after the kids, shopping, raking leaves, cooking.”

“I’m sorry Justin. I’ve been in court for most of this week,” Bobby admitted.

“It’s no wonder you’re tired,” John said. “You’ve been chief cook and bottle washer for almost a week.”

“Not to mention, worrying about me,” Brian said as he tilted Justin’s weary face up to look in the sleepy blue eyes. “Come on, back to bed,” Brian commanded. “I’m home now and there’s no reason for you to be awake at this time.”

“I gotta go,” Bobby said as he looked at his watch. “I might be late,” he added as he ran out after he kissed John.

“Bri, I’ll be up in my office today, if you need me,” John said to Brian. “You take care of Justin.” Brian nodded as he led Justin back to their room.

*****

“How is he?” John asked as Brian rounded the spiral stairs and came into John’s attic office.

“Still sleeping,” Brian answered as he handed his brother a sandwich and tall glass of milk. It was lunchtime and John was still hard at work at his drafting table. “How did I not notice how tired he was?”

“Don’t beat yourself up about it. Justin’s a big boy. If he wanted help he could have said something. He wasn’t completely abandoned, you know,” John assured his brother. “Besides, you’ve been a little preoccupied. He’s young, he’ll bounce back fast. How are you doing?”

“Better now that I’m home. I love the loft but it’s not me anymore. This is me.” Brian waved his hand around.

“Then it’s a good thing that you’re home, isn’t it,” John teased. “But you have no intention of giving up the loft.”

“Nope, it’s mine until I tear down the building. But if Gus wants to live there, he can, when he’s ready.”

“If he does decide to take over Kinnetik, the loft will be convenient for him.”

Brian nodded. “What about you?”

“What about me?”

“John, we’re a lot alike and I don’t mean our looks. I know you’re worried about Claire.”

“Yeah, that terrible thought did cross my mind more than once but since I can’t do a damn thing about it, life goes on,” John said with a shrug.

“Life goes on,” Brian repeated.

“You going to pick up the kids this afternoon?”

“Yes, I promised.”

“Good. Why don’t we peruse the pantries, make a list then do some shopping before we get them. We can cook up a feast for our hard working spouses,” John suggested.

 

“Sounds like a plan,” Brian agreed. He stood to leave his brother to his work and went to take inventory of the refrigerator.

Aftermath

Chapter 6

“Richie, what are you doing home?” Emmett asked as he heard the loft door slide back and saw his newly adopted son step inside the apartment.

“I…um…wasn’t feeling so good,” Richie explained hesitantly.

Emmett immediately was beside his son feeling the young man’s forehead. “What’s wrong? Is it your stomach? Your head doesn’t feel warm. I should take you to the doctor or the walk-in clinic. I should call Drew. He’ll know what to do.”

“Emmett, Emmett, Emmett,” Richie said as he tried to interrupt all to no avail.

“I could call Debbie. She usually knows what to do if someone’s sick. She’ll make chicken soup. Her chicken soup is the best. It’ll make you better…”

“Emmett!” Richie managed to shout over Emmett’s babblings.

“Wha…what?” Emmett stammered.

“I’m not sick. I just don’t feel good.”

“What does that mean? What do I need to do? I better call Drew.”

“Emmett, I’m okay … sort of.”

“What’s wrong?”

“Could we just sit down? I need something to drink.”

“Milk, juice, water, bourbon? What the fuck am I saying?” Emmett asked the loft.

“I don’t know if you don’t,” Richie replied, chuckling in spite of himself. “And some juice would be really good.”

“Okay, juice it is. Sit down and I’ll get you some.”

Richie dropped his backpack beside the couch and sat down. He leaned forward on his knees wondering how he was going to explain all this to Emmett. It didn’t even make sense to him.

“Here you go,” Emmett said cheerfully handing Richie a large glass of orange juice. “Now kindly tell me what you’re doing home. School won’t be over for another hour or two.”

“I just had to get out of there,” Richie said sadly.

“Did…did someone call you names or beat you up? Are you hurt? Is school too hard and you’re failing? You can tell me anything. I can deal with it.”

“Emmett, it’s nothing like that.”

“Then what is it like? I need to know or I’m going to go crazy.”

“Or you already have,” Richie joked.

“Hey!”

“Sorry, but you keep asking me what’s wrong and then you won’t let me get a word in so I can explain.”

“Oh, sorry,” Emmett said. “Does the school know you left? We should call them. I don’t want you getting into trouble. Drew won’t like that.”

“No, the school doesn’t know I’m gone,” Richie admitted. “You could call and tell them I’m … not feeling well.” Richie knew that would make things easier when he returned to school.

“I’ll call right now and then you have to tell me what’s going on. I can’t stand not knowing for one more minute.”

“Okay,” Richie said deciding he needed to talk about what was happening. Emmett could be a good listener once you could get him to calm down and shut up.

Quickly Emmett returned from making things right with the school. He sat down beside Richie and waited, finally deciding that it was time to close his mouth and listen to what his son had to say.

“You know Grandma Joan died,” Richie began.

Emmett nodded. “But I didn’t know you called her Grandma Joan,” he added.

“She called me after my adoption party,” Richie continued. “She was sorry she couldn’t be there.”

“We were all sorry she didn’t feel up to attending. I think she must have known something was wrong.”

Richie nodded. “She said she wanted to welcome me to the family, and she also said…” Richie hesitated swallowing hard. Tears were very close.

“What did she say, sweetie?” Emmett encouraged him.

“She said … that a person could never have too many grandmothers. She wanted me to have one too.”

“Oh my!” Emmett squeaked, tears forming in his eyes too. He pulled his son into a fierce hug. “That was so sweet of her, and she’s right, you can never have too many grandmothers.”

“But now she’s gone,” Richie sniffled against Emmett’s chest. “And I never even got to call her Grandma Joan to her face. She said I could on the phone.”

“Oh sweetie, she was a wonderful old broad. I’m glad she called you and told you that you had a grandma.”

“But now I don’t,” Richie sniffled.

“You know what?” Emmett said as a thought struck him. “You do have a grandma. You just don’t know it.”

“What do you mean?” Richie asked pushing back from Emmett so that he could look into the kind eyes of his new father.

“Drink your juice,” Emmett said. “I’ll be right back.”

“What are you doing?” Richie asked but Emmett had already disappeared into his bedroom. Richie could hear him talking on the phone, but couldn’t make out the words he was saying.

When Emmett returned, he had a smug look on his face. “More juice?” he asked.

“No, that was good. Emmett, what did you mean that I have a grandmother that I don’t know about?”

“You’ll find out in a few minutes,” Emmett replied enigmatically.

“I don’t understand.”

“You will,” Emmett promised as he sat down beside his son again. “You know, Joan would be pleased that people are missing her, especially a fine young man like you.”

“What do you mean?”

“Joan and Brian didn’t get along for a very long time. It’s only the last few years that they became close. I think Joan would have liked to make up for the strained relationship she had with her own son by having a close relationship with you.”

“I’m sad she won’t be here to do that.”

“My Aunt Lula used to say that it was all right to be sad, but one should never wallow. Every cloud has a silver lining.”

Richie shook his head. “When…” Richie couldn’t find the words to say what was troubling him.

“Go ahead, son,” Emmett said gently. “You can tell me.”

Richie took a deep breath. “When I saw my parents at the judge’s chamber, and my mom was pregnant, it was like they were replacing me. My family died that day, kind of like Grandma Joan died, only even more painful. I guess I just wanted more of a family … not that you and Drew aren’t great, but you know, aunts and uncles and … grandmothers … and things.”

“Everyone at your party considers you family now,” Emmett told him.

“I know, but…”

The doorbell rang at that moment. Emmett got up to answer the door. Richie turned around to see Debbie entering the loft.

“May I present your Grandma Deb,” Emmett said proudly. Debbie grinned from ear to ear.

“Huh?” Richie said.

“That’s right, kiddo,” Debbie said proudly. “I’m your Grandma Deb.”

“You … you don’t have to do that,” Richie said uncertainly. He thought this was something Emmett had cooked up to make him feel better, and he didn’t want pity. He just wanted his Grandma Joan.

“Have to?” Debbie shrieked. “I don’t have to do anything I don’t want to do,” she assured Richie. “I’m here because I want to be, and I would be very honored to be your grandma.”

“Really?”

“Absolutely,” Debbie told him. “All my boys, Ted, Brian and Emmett are like my own children, just like Michael, so technically I was your grandmother from the moment you got together with Emm and Drew.”

“But you never said…”

“Honey, I know things have been really hard for you since the problems with your parents. I didn’t want to step on anybody’s toes. I didn’t know if you had a grandmother of your own. I thought you might resent me trying to butt in.”

“I wouldn’t resent you, Deb,” Richie said with a little grin. “I think you’re awesome.”

“I think I’m pretty awesome too,” Debbie boasted proudly. “I won’t be a conventional kind of grandmother, but you’re not a conventional kind of kid, so it should work out just fine. I intend to be a fucking good grandmother. Just ask JR or Hunter or Bree or Gus.”

“I don’t have to ask anybody,” Richie stated. “I see how much you care about all of them.”

“And I care just as much about you, sweetheart,” Debbie said. “You can count on that.”

“Thanks, Grandma Deb,” Richie said standing and giving the brazen redhead a big hug.

“I think I’m going to blubber,” Debbie sniffled.

“Me too,” Emmett added. “Group hug!”

And that’s just what they all did, tears of happiness flowing unabated.

A few minutes later while Emmett was distributing tissues to Richie and his “Grandma Deb” the door bell rang again.

“Are we expecting company?” Richie asked as he blew his nose.

“Not that I know of,” Emmett said as he went to get the door. Debbie remained suspiciously quiet as she blew her own nose. “Jennifer?” Emmett addressed the fashionably dressed blonde standing in his doorway.

“Hi, Emmett,” she said as she pushed her way in and strode over to the newest member of the family. “And that’s Grandma Jennifer to you!” Jenn said as she gave Richie her own fierce hug.

Needless to say another group hug ensued along with another bout of happy tears.

*****

Life began to return to normal as life will often do when there are kids that must go to school, business that must be conducted and art shows that must open whether we like it or not. And then there were the holidays that appeared to have crept up on the family when they least expected them. Brian wasn’t looking forward to Thanksgiving without Joan.

“You know we don’t have to do this,” Justin said as they were all sitting around the table at the Anderson-Morrison end of the cottage after dinner. Bobby had a pad and pencil in his hand jotting down notes.

“He’s right, you know,” John began. “No one would think anything of it if we don’t host Thanksgiving this year.”

“I want to,” Brian said. “We can have a quiet Christmas, just for us. I think I need to do this.”

“Affirmation,” Bobby mumbled.

“What, Babe?” John asked his spouse.

“An affirmation of life. I know it sounds hokey but I’d like to do it too. And a quiet Christmas sounds good to me. I know we talked about going away for the holidays this year but I think I’d prefer to stay home. Let’s do a big Thanksgiving. Invite Simon, Ken and the boys, if you think they can get away. With the new B&B and the rest of the cottages, we have plenty of room to put up everyone,” Bobby said. His hand began to scurry across the page making lists of who could go where.

“We’ve been in doom and gloom mode for weeks now and I’m tired of it. I want decorations and the smell of homemade apple pie. I miss my mother’s chocolate cake,” Bobby said wistfully.

Brian and John weren’t the only ones with older parents. Bobby had more than a few thoughts of his parents not being around to celebrate the holidays for much longer. He had begun passing by his parent’s house in Bridgeton on his way home from his office on occasion.

“Then that settles it. We get the party fairy to plan the biggest fucking shindig this lane has ever seen,” Brian added with determination.

“Dada, can we make special invitations like we did for my princess party?” a little voice asked from her chair.

Bree had been watching the adults who had become so serious since her Gamma Joan died. For weeks now everyone seemed so sad. Bree was tired of crying herself to sleep. She found herself taking her grey bunny and sneaking into Patrick’s bed. He always made her feel better even if he didn’t say anything. The first time it happened, Justin was scared out of his mind when he went to wake her up for school and found an empty bed. He went flying into the porch and slammed into Bobby who was coming to get him. Bobby led Justin to Patrick’s room and there was Bree sleeping peacefully next to Patrick, with grey bunny and Beau at the foot of the bed.

“I think that’s an excellent idea. We can work on it this weekend,” Brian replied.

“We can make it a family project,” Justin suggested getting nods from everyone. “I’ll go to the art store and buy plenty of special paper so we can make the right card for everyone in the family.”

“Oh, thank you, Daddy!” Bree exclaimed as she got down from her chair then flew into her daddy’s arms. It was the first time in weeks that Edna’s Treasures had seen a sunshine smile. “And my Patrick will help too, right?”

“Yup!” Patrick confirmed with his own sunny smile. Bree giggled madly, clapping and bouncing gleefully in Justin’s lap.

As if the clouds parted, the men of Edna’s Treasures smiled and laughed.

*****

“Oh! Oh! Oh!” Emmett squeed into the phone after Brian called him about their Thanksgiving plans. Brian held the phone at arms length.

“You through piercing my eardrum?” he snarked.

“Yes, sire,” Emmett replied, getting himself under control. His brain was already in overdrive planning the menu. “Do I have your permission to call in the troops?”

“You have my permission to call anyone you wish, you big fairy,” Brian said. “And decorations. I want all the fucking Fall leaves, turkeys and cornucopias that you can fit into this house. Both houses and the B&B too,” Brian demanded.

“Your wish is my command, General!” Emmett snapped to attention and saluted even though he knew Brian couldn’t see him. Brian smirked, he had an idea what Emmett was doing.

“You just make sure that everyone that shows up is wearing a smile,” Brian demanded.

“Smiles. Check! Anything else?”

“Not that I can think of.”

“Just make sure you turn up the heat,” Emmett said.

“What’s our furnace got to do with anything?” Brian asked puzzled.

“We’re going to be awfully cold just wearing smiles and nothing else,” Emmett teased.

“This is me hanging up,” Brian said as he hung up the phone glaring at the offending instrument. Then he broke out into a fit of giggles.

Emmett put down the phone and laughed.

“Wanna let me in on the joke?” Drew asked as he walked into the kitchen and saw his spouse laughing like a hyena.

“Oh nothing, just teasing our Mr. Kinney,” Emmett said very pleased with himself.

“Did anyone ever tell you that you have one hell of a set of balls? Not many people can get away with teasing Brian Kinney and live to tell about it.” Drew gave his brave spouse a hug.

“It does take a very special kind of person,” Emmett admitted with a smug smile.

“Yes, it does and you are one very special person,” Drew purred then kissed his special person senseless.

*****

It was Saturday morning and the family had just finished waffles and berries in the Anderson-Morrison side of Edna’s Treasures. John and Bobby had decided it was their turn to lay out a feast for breakfast. It was part of the plan to spend the morning making the invitations for Thanksgiving.

Patrick and Bree were very excited to be part of the process. The adults all had ideas about what the invitations should look like, but so did the children.

“Daddy, what color paper did you get for the invitations?” Bree asked, referring to Justin’s trip to the art supply store the day before.

“I chose card stock in autumn colors – orange and brown and gold and red. And then I got a packet of mixed colors so we can have accents.”

“That’s good,” Bree agreed with her great knowledge of art gleaned from her talented father.

“But what are the invitations going to look like?” Patrick asked.

“I think we should make a different one for each person,” Bree stated. “Just like we did for my birthday party.”

“We have a lot more people to make invitations for this time,” Justin cautioned.

“I think we should settle on one design, and then we can each help make them,” Bobby agreed.

“That makes sense,” John contributed. “I’m not much at designing cards.”

“But you’re great at buildings,” Bobby said with a smile for his husband.

John blushed in spite of himself. Bobby’s opinion meant the world to him.

“Are you two finished the mutual admiration society?” Brian asked, but with no malice in his voice. “I think we need to get this creative proposition underway.”

“We could list all the symbols of Thanksgiving, and then we can pick one to use for the invitation,” Justin suggested.

“Good plan,” Brian agreed. John and Bobby nodded their approval.

“I think we should use a turkey,” Patrick suggested.

“Turkey,” Justin said as he wrote that on his list.

“Cornercopia,” Bree threw in.

“Corn-u-copia,” Justin corrected as he added it to the list.

“Autumn leaves,” Bobby said.

“A big cranberry,” John said with a chuckle.

“You’ve got to be kidding,” Brian interjected, but Justin ignored him and added it to his list. “I’m good at drawing circles,” John explained, “and we could cut them out of red paper.”

“What about a pumpkin?” Patrick asked.

“Any other suggestions?” Justin asked as he read out the list. Everyone shook their head. “Then I have an idea. What if we make a cornucopia filled with cranberries, squash, autumn leaves, etc.”

“And a turkey leg,” Brian suggested with a wicked look. He could see what Justin was doing incorporating everyone’s suggestions.

“No turkey leg,” Justin stated. “And then we could have a pumpkin that folds out to reveal the information inside.”

“That sounds great,” John said. “Can you design it?”

“Sure,” Justin said. I think we can do most of it on the computer and then we’ll have to cut it out and assemble it.”

“Great work, Sunshine,” Brian said. “So you don’t need me.” Brian stood up.

“Oh yes we do!” Justin replied grabbing Brian’s hand as he tried to escape. “We need a catchy verse inside to get everyone’s attention, and that will be your job, O great adman.”

“What the fuck for?” Brian demanded. “Usually we just make a few phone calls and they all show up.”

“This year is different,” Justin said. “So get to work.”

“Yes sir, O bossy bottom.” Brian saluted and headed for his office to think about his assignment.

Justin headed for his computer to look at the fall symbols he had listed and see if he could make them into a design. John and Bobby began the clean-up from breakfast. Bree and Patrick went to set up pencils, crayons, scissors and glue on the big table in the sun porch.

About a half an hour later they all assembled in the sun porch to see what had been devised. Justin had run off a cornucopia filled with all the things he had listed except the pumpkin and the turkey leg. There was a space in the end of the cornucopia for the message to be placed.

“Where’s the pumpkin?” Patrick asked. That had been his idea and it wasn’t included.

“Don’t worry, Patrick,” Justin assured him. “Your pumpkin is going to be the central thing of this design.” Justin took a piece of orange paper, laid the cornucopia which he had cut out on top of it and then sketched a pumpkin at the end. He folded the pumpkin back and it fit perfectly into the open end of the cornucopia still revealing parts of the other things in the cone. The pumpkin covered the message area so that it would have to be opened to reveal the purpose of the card.

“Pretty, Daddy,” Bree said giving her stamp of approval. Everyone nodded in agreement.

“But what’s the message going to say?” John asked. They all looked at Brian.

“I came up with two that I’m hard pressed to choose between,” Brian said. “So you can decide.” He began reading the first:

I can’t imagine anyone else I’d rather invite to share in our food-induced coma than you.

Join us for Thanksgiving at Edna’s Treasures.

“Are you serious?” Justin asked in horror. Brian merely smirked.

“I thought you wanted this to be special,” Bobby said in bewilderment. This was not what he had expected.

“Everything I write is special,” Brian stated.

“Dada, what’s the real message?” Bree asked. She knew her father was putting them all on.

“Ah, the youngest one is the smartest one,” Brian said with a smile of approval to his daughter. “I was just funnin’ ya.” John gave his brother a well placed elbow. “Ow! Okay, okay, here’s what I came up with.” He read once again:

There are few things we are more thankful for than having our family and friends in our lives.

Please celebrate Thanksgiving with us at Edna’s Treasures.

There was silence.

“Well?” Brian asked with a frown. He thought he had done a good job, but the silence said otherwise.

“Sometimes you take my breath away, little brother,” John finally said giving Brian a hug.

“Perfect!” Bobby agreed.

 

“Let’s get to work,” Justin said with a happy smile.

Aftermath

Chapter 7

“Here’s the mail, honey,” Carl said as he placed a stack of envelopes on the table.

“More bills,” Debbie said with a snort.

“There’s one that looks different.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, this one,” Carl said pulling a slightly larger than normal envelope out of the pile. He handed it to Debbie before pouring himself another coffee and sitting down.

“What the fuck is this?” Debbie asked examining the envelope from all angles and holding it up to the light.

“Why don’t you open it and see?”

Debbie snorted again at the simplistic suggestion, but she ripped the envelope open and pulled out the cornucopia that had been so lovingly constructed at Edna’s Treasures.

“What is it?” Carl asked as Debbie just sat there looking at it.

Debbie turned the pumpkin back and read the message inside. “Holy shit!”

“What…what is it?” Carl asked, getting slightly worried by Debbie’s reaction.

“It’s beautiful,” Debbie said with a little sniffle. “Read it.”

Carl took the card in the shape of a cornucopia from his wife. He looked at the carefully crafted piece of work. “There’s a little rainbow with black and brown at the edges drawn near the tip of the cornucopia,” Carl observed.

“Bree,” they both said.

“Read what’s inside,” Debbie ordered.

Carl flipped the card open and read the message inside the pumpkin. “That’s really … nice,” he said.

“It’s fucking awesome!”

“Whose idea do you think this is?” Carl asked.

“It’s Justin’s artwork, but it’s Brian Kinney from the heart,” Debbie declared.

“You think so?”

“I know so. Joanie’s death has had a profound effect on that boy.”

“He’s hardly a boy,” Carl informed her.

“He’ll always be my boy, one of my lost boys, only he isn’t lost anymore. This proves it.”

“So, are we going?” Carl asked with a little smile.

“You bet your hunky ass we are!”

“Hunky ass?”

“You heard me, big boy.”

“You gettin’ frisky there, Mrs. Horvath?”

“Come here and I’ll show you.”

And she did.

*****

“Have you seen this?”

“What?”

“This invitation.”

“What invitation?”

“From Edna’s Treasures.”

“What are you talking about, Drewsie? I have no idea to what you might be referring,” Emmett said.

“I found this cornucopia on the counter. Did you get it?”

“Oh, that old thing,” Emmett said. “Did you read it?” he asked with a tiny intake of a breath.

“Yeah, just a minute ago.”

“What did you think?”

“I think it’s rather out of character for the inhabitants of Edna’s Treasures to be so formal … and honest,” Drew responded. “But I guess things are different this year … without Joan.”

“Yeah, Brian called me a few days ago and said they were going all out this year. It’s going to be a Thanksgiving to remember,” Emmett said happily.

“You’ve been planning and plotting ever since, haven’t you?” Drew said shaking his head.

“Of course! I’ve just about got all the decorating planned. I’ve drawn up a list for the food, and I will be calling people tomorrow to tell them what to bring.”

“You’re a party planning machine,” Drew said as he kissed Emmett’s cheek.

“I think the sentiment inside the card was lovely. I want this to be a really special day for Brian fucking Kinney and his whole family.”

“I know you’ll make it very special, because you’re special.”

“Care to show me how special I am?” Emmett asked with a wink and a toothy grin. “I think I deserve a break from all my hard work on this party.”

“It would be my pleasure,” Drew said, “and I hope your pleasure too.”

“Oooh, Drewsie,” Emmett sighed as he allowed himself to be led to their bedroom.

*****

“Look at this,” Ken said handing the cornucopia card to Simon.

“What is it?”

“An invitation.”

“To what?”

“To Thanksgiving at Edna’s Treasures. Read the inscription.”

Simon read the inside of the card. “That’s lovely. I … think we should go. We didn’t make it to Brian’s mother’s funeral, so this would be … nice. What do you think?”

“I think we talk to the boys and see about going. Something about this card and the words inside it say that this Thanksgiving is very important to our friends. We should be there for them.”

“Ray and Gus will be over the moon spending Thanksgiving together,” Simon observed.

“And I’ll be over the moon spending it with you and the family.”

“Let’s make it happen,” Simon said as he pulled his mate into a long, passionate kiss.

The cornucopia card was spreading good will and lots of love wherever it was received. All this unbeknownst to its creators.

*****

At several more homes in Pittsburgh, the cornucopia card made the recipients feel all warm and fuzzy. Many made serious changes to their plans so that they would be able to travel to Edna’s Treasures for this special holiday. The phone on the lane began to ring with people accepting and wanting to contribute to the food.

Brian passed them on to Emmett. He was surprised at how many compliments he got on the card and the sentiments expressed inside it. It made him feel all warm inside too.

*****

Brian was checking off Lindsay and the girls on his list of invitees when the phone rang once again.

“Party central,” Brian said when he saw who was calling.

“What?”

“It’s okay, Sonny Boy, just your old dad having some fun with you.”

“I just got my invitation,” Gus said. “It’s beautiful.”

“That seems to be the consensus of opinion about the card,” Brian said smugly.

“You wrote the words inside the card, didn’t you, Pop?”

“What makes you think that?”

“They’re … really meaningful. I couldn’t have said it better myself.”

“Is that so,” Brian observed, but he was secretly touched that Gus had figured that out and agreed with his sentiments.

“You are the man of words.”

“Sometimes that’s a good thing and sometimes it’s a curse,” Brian said thoughtfully.

“This time it was definitely a good thing.”

“Thanks,” Brian said simply.

“I saw Bree’s trademark rainbow on the end of the cornucopia.”

“She insisted.”

Gus chuckled. “I think you’ve got her into branding already. She’s going to be an advertising genius in a couple of years.”

“Couple of years? She already is!” Brian told him in no uncertain terms.

Father and son had a good laugh over that. It felt good to share some frivolity.

“How you doing, Pop?” Gus asked after a minute or two.

“I’m okay. What about you?”

“I miss her.”

“Me too.”

“She was a good woman.”

“Yeah, who would have thought? There were so many years that we couldn’t stand each other. We … wasted a lot of time.”

“Dad, I’d really like to talk to you about your childhood when I come home for Thanksgiving.”

“You … you don’t want to hear about that,” Brian protested.

“Yes I do. I know it won’t be easy, but I really want to hear your memories … bad and good.”

“You won’t like it.”

“Let me be the judge of that,” Gus stated.

“I heard from Simon and Ken. They’re coming for Thanksgiving along with Ray and Jeff.” Brian hoped this piece of news might distract Gus from the conversation they had been having.

“Really? That’s great.”

“I thought you might be pleased.”

“You’re just hoping I’ll be too busy with Ray to ask about your childhood.”

“Would I dare think such a thing?”

Gus laughed. “Oh yeah!”

“You know me too well.”

“But not as well as I want to.”

Brian sighed into the phone. He didn’t want to talk about this anymore. “Bree will be over the moon when she hears that you’re coming home.”

“She’s not going to stop me from talking to you either.”

“Give it a rest, Sonny Boy.”

“Okay, Pop, but I intend to find out what I want to know.”

“Why didn’t you talk to your grandmother if you’re so interested?”

“I did.”

“When?” Brian asked surprised.

“On a few occasions. Grandma and I had an understanding.”

“What kind of an understanding?”

“What happens in the past stays in the past,” Gus said trying to be funny.

“Then why are you dredging it up into the present?”

“I just … want to understand.”

“Some things are inexplicable.”

“Or so you’d have me believe.”

“Gus…”

“Pop, it’s all right. I don’t want to pry. If there’s things you don’t want me to know, I can live with that. Just tell me what you can.”

Brian rubbed his hand over his eyes. “This is important to you, isn’t it?’

“Yes it is.”

“Try not to let it ruin Thanksgiving.”

“I’d never do that,” Gus promised. “It sounds like this is going to be an extra special Thanksgiving.”

“That’s what we’re aiming for.”

“Pop, I’m really proud of you.”

Brian opened his mouth to say something flip, but then it closed without a word coming out. After a minute Brian was able to say, “Thanks.”

“I mean it, you know.”

“I’m really proud of you too, Gus.”

“Us Kinneys aren’t a very big group, but we are mighty,” Gus said with a chuckle, hoping a bit of levity would relieve the seriousness of what they had just said to each other.

“Yeah, and we can count on each other.”

“One hundred percent.”

“Looking forward to seeing you in a few days.”

“Me too, Pop, me too.” Gus cut the connection.

Brian stared at his phone for a long time before he finally placed it back in its base.

*****

When Justin arrived back from Pittsburgh following a meeting with Sidney at the gallery, he found Brian standing in the sun porch staring out at the backyard.

“It’s kind of sad, isn’t it?” Justin said as he walked up behind Brian and gave him a peck on the cheek.

“What’s sad?”

“The gardens. The flowers are almost all gone. They’ve been stripped for the winter.”

“Kind of like old age.”

Justin frowned not clear as to Brian’s meaning. “What do you mean by that?”

“I’ve been thinking while you were gone.”

“That can be a scary thing.”

“When we get older, life is gradually stripped away from us, like the gardens are stripped in the fall.”

“How so?” Justin asked with a frown.

“Joan didn’t come to Richie’s party. She thought the trip was too long and tiring. Yet she loved the family and wanted to be here to see her grandchildren and to help celebrate a new member to the family. She was stripped of that enjoyment by her age and health.”

“I see.”

“Life can be a bitch.”

“I guess you could say that. But life also has some wonderful parts to it.”

“Such as?”

“Want me to show you?”

“In a minute,” Brian said. Justin could see the wheels turning. Brian needed to get something out, and sex wasn’t going to cut it until he did.

“Tell me what you’re thinking,” Justin encouraged.

“Gus called. He liked the card.”

“That’s good. We did a great job as a family.”

“Yeah. He wants me to tell him about my childhood.”

“I see.”

“You know I hate to talk about it.”

“Yes, but maybe Gus’ desire to know is more important than your reluctance to reveal some of the bad things that happened during your childhood.”

“Why does he need to know?” Brian asked. “Why can’t it just … die with Joan?”

“It’s part of Gus’ history too, Brian. He has a right to learn about his family.”

“Even when it’s totally dysfunctional?”

“Even then.”

Brian shook his head. “I knew you were going to say that.”

“It wasn’t so bad when Bree was learning about the family, was it?”

“No, but she barely scratched the surface.”

“And you think Gus will want to dig deeper?”

“You know he will,” Brian averred.

“And what’s so bad about that? He knows your father was rough with you, and he knows about Joan’s drinking. He already knows the worst.”

“I don’t want to put it into words,” Brian said.

“Tell him as much as you can. That’s all he wants.”

“I’ll try, but I don’t know…”

“You’re the bravest man I know, Brian Kinney. You can do it.”

Brian laughed. “I was reading on the internet today…”

“You were?” Justin asked in mock horror.

Brian ignored his antics. “They say that part of grieving a parent’s death, especially when it’s the last parent, is coming to the realization that you are now the elder generation. You have no parents, you are the parents. I’m the next generation to die if life follows its timeworn pattern.”

“That’s a lot to contend with.”

“Yeah, but it puts things in perspective. I wonder if that’s why Joan finally decided that her remaining life was too short to live it in hatred and bigotry.”

“I bet that probably had something to do with her transformation into the loving person we grew to know. Remember to tell Gus about that too.”

“I will.”

“Are you ready for me to show you some of the wonderful things that the world has to offer?” Justin asked with a suggestive bat of his eyelashes.

“That sounds like a great idea. I’m ready to stop thinking about death and taxes.”

“Taxes?”

“That was the only other bad thing I could think of at the moment.”

Justin laughed heartily. “Come on, my foolish husband. I have some things to show you in the bedroom.”

“We better get at it before the hordes descend on the lane for Thanksgiving. We’re going to be chock-a-block. Nobody’s turned us down.”

“That’s great.”

“Yeah, great,” Brian said, and he realized that he actually meant it. He grabbed Justin’s hand and pulled him towards their bedroom. They had plenty of things to do before the kids came home from school.

 

Aftermath

Chapter 8

Epilogue

About a week before the holiday the Thanksgiving ‘fairies’ descended upon the lane. Every blank surface was decorated with images of the season and the occasion. Emmett started with his own cottage then spread out to the B and B and Molly’s cottage. Not to be outdone, Rachel went all out in her own home at the top of the lane. The front door of the greenhouse was sporting a large wreath of dried flowers. Even the Wendy house had a drawing of a turkey with rainbow colored tail feathers (Bree’s rainbow) on its door, much to Bree’s delight.

As if by magic, decorations kept popping up throughout the conjoined cottages.

“Justin, did you do this?” Brian pointed to a tasteful collection of mini gourds in a beautiful wicker basket sitting on top of the toilet tank in their private bathroom. The basket startled Brian when he came into the bathroom to perform his morning ablutions.

“Nope, wasn’t me,” Justin said with a twinkle in his deep blue eyes.

“How is he doing it?” Brian mumbled. “I haven’t spotted Emmett on the lane. Richie still has school for a few more days and I know for a fact that Drew is in Chicago with the Ironmen. Who’s doing this?”

“Maybe there really are Thanksgiving fairies,” Justin quipped as he reached up to peck Brian’s lips.

Brian shrugged his shoulders, resigned to just accept.

The day before the main event the lane began to fill up with cars. Since certain little people still had school, the visitors refrained from descending upon the cottage, allowing for some normalcy, and going about their business with their pre-cooking tasks.

“Dada, do I hafta go to school today?” Bree asked as she waited by the front door with Patrick for the school bus. Bree recognized the cars and wanted to spend the day with the family. Brian merely arched a brow. Bree sighed, kissed her fathers goodbye then ran out to the bus when it pulled up in front of the cottage.

“Persistent, isn’t she?” Justin stated with a smile.

“Takes after her father,” Brian snarked as he swept Justin into his arms for a proper kiss.

“I love you,” Justin whispered against Brian’s lips. Brian stared into the sapphire blue eyes. “I love you for doing this.” He waved his hand indicating the impending ta-do. Brian said nothing, but kissed Justin again then retreated to his attic office.

*****

It was Thanksgiving Day of 2020, Brian was looking forward to having his cwazy wittle family around him for the day. But he was painfully aware that an important member of the family wasn’t present. He was trying his best not to become morose and sullen, channeling his negative energies into doing productive things such as being the official greeter for the event and bartender for the day. Watching the blender crush ice cubes was becoming cathartic for Brian. When about the tenth person came up to him with an exaggerated smile plastered onto his face, Brian burst out into laughter.

“Okay, I get it!” Brian said out loud so that the whole family could hear then he drew Owen Sr. into his arms for a fierce hug. The family cheered as Owen patted Brian on the back then went to mingle.

When it was time for dinner, the family settled around the long table in the sun porch. The smaller round wicker tables came in handy for the overflow and for a ‘kids’ table. Before the meal commenced, everyone turned toward Brian, giving him their undivided attention. Justin had made sure Brian was seated at the middle of the table so that he could have a view of their entire family. At a nudge from Justin, Brian stood up.

Brian cleared his throat as he looked at each of the faces of his family and at Beau who was standing close to Bree, contentedly wagging his tail. Brian realized that he truly was blessed.

“We’ve had one hell of a year, haven’t we, Sunshine?” Brian said as he leaned over to kiss the blond head. Justin smiled as he silently nodded.

“We...I’d like to thank you all for coming here today to share this day with us. A little over a month ago the gods took away someone who had grown very important to me, to all of us over the past few years. I’m still fucking pissed about that, but having you all here today is proof that sometimes the gods do get it right once in a while.”

He paused as a wave of chuckles flowed through the room. Bree was beaming him one of her sunniest smiles, grey bunny sitting on her lap. Gus, happy as a pig in you know what since Ray was sitting right next to him, was glowing. Gus laughed as Brian arched a brow at them; their hidden hands suddenly appeared on top of the table.

“There was a time when holidays meant nothing to me, just another excuse to get shit-faced and trick. How times have changed. And I am very grateful for every moment of it.

“We have a few additions to our family to be grateful for and I welcome you all,” Brian indicated Candy, Richie, Todd and Gerry, each getting hugs and kisses from someone sitting close by. Richie was especially happy, sniffling with more happy tears when earlier in the day he was presented with two more grandmothers. Claire and Emily had cornered him to declare themselves.

“Before I completely turn into a lesbian...” Brian heard a snort from Debbie, “I just want to say thank you to all of you for being here and sharing this day with us. I am very thankful for my cwazy wittle family.”

As the porch erupted into cheers, Justin stood to give Brian a kiss. When some order had finally resumed, Brian and Justin sat then called upon Father Tom, who was intimately (a-hem) acquainted with the family. Father Tom stood to address them.

“As we mourn those who are not with us here today, we celebrate life and give thanks for the miracle that brings us all together.” Father Tom held out his arms then silently made a sign of blessing.

Cognizant of the different faiths present in the room, Father Tom said, “Please join hands, look into your hearts and give praise.” Tom looked up toward the glass ceiling of the sun porch, the waning rays of the setting sun shining gold and red, bathing the family in its ethereal light.

“Bless us all.”

*****

“What am I doing here?” Brian grumbled as he took off his coat and stuffed his scarf in the sleeve.

“You’re enjoying a bit of culture,” Justin teased as he settled into his seat.

After the Thanksgiving extravaganza with the family, Justin presented Brian with a pair of tickets to the Trockadero de Monte Carlo. He knew Brian had been interested in going to see the Trocks at one time and Ted had bought tickets. Brian had lost interest in the ballet after his mother’s death, but Justin thought it would be a good diversion for his husband. Ted had been able to get tickets for this performance that Justin had selected.

The Trocks were performing in a little theater in the Chelsea section of New York City. Justin decided to take Brian to the show the weekend before Christmas, so that they then could spend a quiet holiday together with their Edna’s Treasures family. Since the Trocks were only performing in New York, Justin had made reservations at a swanky hotel with all the perks. He was determined to pamper Brian even if it killed him.

“Ballet is so not me, Sunshine,” Brian said glumly.

“This ballet will be, I guarantee it. So sit back, shut up and relax,” Justin ordered. As the house lights dimmed and an announcer with a phony Russian accent introduced the night’s performance, Brian sat back, shut up and relaxed. From that moment on Brian and Justin laughed.

“That was fucking great!” Brian proclaimed as they strolled along Seventh Avenue. He leaned down to give Justin a loud kiss on his rosy cold cheek. The New York winter could be bitter.

“The “Dying Swan” is hysterical!”

[To catch a glimpse of the cultural experience Brian and Justin enjoyed, go here.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YRp5nE0Hlsc&feature=related ]

“I knew you’d like it,” Justin said smugly then pulled Brian into one of the many gay friendly restaurants that lined Chelsea. They enjoyed an intimate meal then walked along the tourist packed streets of the Village before hailing a cab and going back to their hotel for a bit of Brian and Justin magic.

In between rounds of lovemaking, Justin leaned over the side of the bed to dig something out of a bag. He presented a box to Brian.

“What’s this?”

“It’s something your mother wanted you to have,” Justin said gently. Brian fingered the wrapping.

“It’s not Christmas yet,” Brian whispered.

“It wasn’t meant as a Christmas gift. Open it,” Justin urged.

Brian slowly and carefully unwrapped the box. In it on a bed of tissue paper was an album bound with a cover of tooled leather.

“This looks expensive,” he murmured.

“Joan had it made especially for you. She knew how you appreciated quality.”

“She shouldn’t have.”

“Brian, she wasn’t destitute,” Justin said as he placed his hand on Brian’s. “You and Ted showed her how to wisely manage her money. She needed to do this.”

“But...”

“Just open it.”

Brian took out the album, pushing away the box then laid it across his lap. He slowly opened the cover.

“While we were organizing the other pictures and documents, Joan showed me another box,” Justin explained further as Brian turned the first few pages. “She kept practically every article she could find about you. This had come to her by accident.”

Justin pointed to a Penn State Alumni magazine. Brian’s face was on the front cover. The article was written around the time of the Stockwell debacle. Someone had found out Brian’s involvement and leaked it to the college editor.

Justin closely watched Brian’s face looking for signs of stress or pain as Brian flipped through the book. “She wasn’t sure if she should give this to you.”

“Why?” Brian looked up and into Justin’s eyes. The hazel eyes were moist with unshed tears.

“She thought maybe you’d get angry or feel betrayed.”

“Betrayed?”

“She did love you. From the moment you were born, she did love you.” Justin pointed to the picture of baby Brian in Jack’s arms. It was a copy of the one Brian had in his wallet. “But somehow her feelings for you got all twisted up. And for years she couldn’t express them. Even when you thought she hated you, she loved you. She just couldn’t tell you.”

There was an article about Brian winning the Clio and a newspaper article about the opening of Kinnetik.

“Holy fuck!” Brian murmured.

“I convinced her to put this all together. With her contacts at the bookstore she found a book binder that could do it justice.” Brian closed the book to again look at the elegantly etched cover and spine. Justin ran his hand over the rich leather. He mused over how much of their lives had been affected by what he had once found in a book and now another book was making a significant impact.

“It’s beautiful,” Brian said. “Thank you,” he whispered pulling Justin into his arms. “Thank you for convincing her to do this.”

“You’re not angry?”

“I’m fucking angrier than a cat caught in the rain but not at you. I’m angry at myself and at old Joanie. We wasted so much fucking time.”

“Maybe you did, but maybe you two just weren’t ready. And when you were, something wonderful happened. Just know that deep down, your mother always loved you.”

Brian nodded then he set the album aside. He wasn’t ready to examine it closely. He would one day. But not just yet. Besides he had a gorgeously hot blond lying naked next to him.

Brian Kinney had more important things to do.