Chapter 1

“I’m coming, Aaron.” Justin tried to pull out of Brian’s arms but he pulled him back for one more kiss. 

When he finally let him go he said, “Shut your eyes for a few more minutes.  You were up with him a couple hours ago.”  

Justin laid in bed and listened to Brian talk to Aaron.  “You are going to wear your beautiful daddy out and if you do that he doesn’t have any energy for this daddy.”  Justin heard Brian mumble and then heard, “Oh, god, we need to start feeding you real food.  These diapers…”

Justin smiled as he pictured them in the next room.  He knew Brian didn’t like to change dirty diapers at all but he had been doing his share. Justin heard a soft noise and when he glanced at the door he saw Gus peeking around it.  He waved him in and Gus ran in, climbing over Justin and under the covers. Justin pulled him close and whispered, “Sh, let’s surprise your dad.” Gus giggled softly but then went silent.

“For someone so little this kid can make the biggest mess!”  Brian commented. Justin pointed to the squirming blanket next to him and put a finger to his mouth. “You get the next diaper.” Brian laid Aaron between their pillows and Justin dropped a kiss on his cheek and then kissed Brian. Brian continued, “Good thing that Gus isn’t here.  We wouldn’t want him in our bed with us.  He doesn’t like to have fun..”

“Daddy, I like fun!” Gus popped out from under the blanket and Brian pulled him over away from Aaron so he could rough house with him without hurting Aaron.  Gus’ giggles were contagious.  He had to laugh as Gus pinned Brian down and then kissed his dad. Brian hugged his squirming son for a moment.

There was another knock on the bedroom door. “Is Mr. Gus in there?” Ronni’s voice came from the hall.  

“Ronni, can you save me from this little monster?”  Brian started tickling Gus again as their house manager walked in.  

“This young man must get ready for preschool,” she said in her clipped Jamacian accent. “Kiss your papas and come with me.”

“Ok, Ronni,” Gus, kissed Brian and then Justin.  “I can’t forget Aaron.” Gus kissed his little brother on the cheek and then scampered off the bed and took Ronni’s hand before she pulled the door shut.

“I hope we pay that woman enough. With Aaron getting up so often yet and you still need to be careful with your headaches, I don’t know what we would do if she didn’t keep us on schedule.  You know in a couple minutes she will ask if I got my lazy ass out of bed because she knows I have a meeting this morning.” Brian trailed his hand down Justin’s side and grabbed his ass pulling him against his erection, “And I really had hoped we had time for….”

“Brian, are you out of bed yet? You have no time to mess with your husband this morning.” Ronni’s voice came from the hall as she took Gus downstairs for breakfast.

“You don’t think she had cameras installed do you?” he kissed Brian and then slipped out of bed, pulling his robe on before picking up Aaron. “I need to feed this little guy anyway.” He followed Brian into the bathroom where he was getting in the shower.  “Are you going to be home late tonight?”

“I’ll let you know.  I should be home on time but if this meeting stirs anything up….”

“Is this the one with the European company?”

“It is.  I know at some point I will have to go over there but I don’t expect that for a couple months but …” Brian came out of the shower and started drying off. 

“But you could possibly have to go soon?”

“It’s a slim possibility.  I would need to go next week but I am hoping not to have to.” He kissed Justin. “You Ok with that?”

“I don’t have to like it but you have a business to run.  A business that takes very good care of all of us.” They kissed once more but Aaron started crying.  “I’ll go get his breakfast and make sure Ronni has your coffee made.”

When Brian entered the kitchen Ronni whistled, “You look as sweet as sugar and as spicy as creole.”

“I wouldn’t say he is spicy but salty…” Ronni pulled a face as Justin smiled at him and strolled over to kiss him.  “You look gorgeous.”

“I think Ronni even thinks so,” Brian said as he touched Aaron’s cheek and went to get his coffee from Ronni.

She handed him a travel mug filled with coffee just the way he likes it. “Here take some of these to the office.” She handed him several individually wrapped bars of some kind.”

“What are they?”

“They are protein bars.  I make them for my Jamie all the time. If you have to skip a meal, eat one. You need to stay healthy for this family of yours.’

Brian kissed her cheek.  “Thank you.” 

Ronni blushed and changed the subject. “Come on my Gus, I will drive you to school.” Gus who had been coloring at the table rushed over to her and they were off. Brian followed right behind and Justin stood in the house holding Aaron.

Justin laid Aaron down to nap and he looked at Ronni’s schedule.  It was Gus’ short day so she would run errands and get groceries and then bring him back about lunch. Then Justin would go to his studio and work for a few hours.  He made a cup of Ronni’s special tea and sat down to sip it.  He had a low thud in his head which was the norm but the tea kept it at bay and the doctors expected it to get better as everything healed inside his skull. He sipped the liquid as he sketched for a bit but as he finished the tea he set his head back on the sofa and closed his eyes.

Justin woke with a start when he felt fingers on his temples.  “What the …”

“Relax, sweetie, it’s just me.” Emmett continued the circular motion on Justin’s head.  “Is it bad?”

Justin smiled up with his eyes closed. “Nothing serious.  The tea is already helping.  They get a little less severe every day. I’d say in another month they should be better.  By then hopefully Aaron will sleep more at night and I will have healed some more.” Justin reached up and took t’s hand. “Do you have time for a cup of coffee?” 

“I’m all yours. Jamesy went into town to get lawn supplies and I have a busy weekend ahead but I have today all to myself.” He walked to the counter, “I’ll grab our coffee.  I was hoping I had James all to myself but…”

“Well, I hear it’s supposed to rain this afternoon so no lawn work.”  

“Oh, I hope you’re right.” Emmetttt handed him a cup and sat next to him on the sofa. “How are you really, Justin.  You have had so much going on.  I mean you are 21 years old. You’re married and have two children.  I know you love it all but….It’s a lot.”

Justin smiled at Emmett.  “It is but what would I give up?  If we didn’t have Ronni I wouldn’t survive.  Speaking of Ronni, how is it going with her and the two of you?”

“She still struggles to accept it sometimes but overall she is really trying her best. I will just keep being my same sweet lovable self and she will eventually love me because she loves Jamesy.” Em put his arm around Justin who was comfortable leaning against him. “Brian isn’t coming home anytime soon, is he? He might kick me off the grounds.”

“No, he’s in an important meeting this morning and pretty soon he may have to go to Europe for a week or two.”

“Well, if that happens James and I will move in so we can help you and Ronni with the boys.”

“Oh, Em, that would be nice.  I’m sure Mom will help out, too, but with Molly in school she can’t be out here as much.”

“Well, I love seeing my big, strong man holding those beautiful boys of yours.  It makes me all tingly and you know what’s tingling the most!” 

“I’m glad you’re here. It is so good to see you as happy as I am.”

“But not as tired.  You look exhausted, sweetie.  Why don’t you,” as if on cue Aaron started to whimper. Justin started to stand but Em pushed him back. “I got him. Come to Uncle Emmy.” Emmett picked up the fussing baby. “Well, I can tell what woke you up. Lay down for a few minutes, Justin.  I can handle him for ten minutes.”  Justin laid down and was out in seconds.

An hour later Justin sat up saying, “Aaron!” 

“He’s fine, sweetie.” Justin looked to the counter and saw Emmett standing next to James who had Aaron in his massive arms. “Jamesy gave him a bottle with a little water.  He said that would be good.”

Justin moved across the room to his son.  “You should have woken me.  What if…?

“As tired as you were, you weren’t any good to anyone.  You look much better rested.”

“I have to admit, my head isn’t hurting anymore. And if I didn’t even hear James, come in, I must have really been tired. I’m so sorry.”

“There is nothing to be sorry about.  I love holding this wee one.” James kissed the baby before passing him to his father.

“Looks like rain.  May I suggest you two go start the fireplace in your house.”

“I really should get to…” James started to protest.

“Tomorrow is supposed to be a beautiful day, although a little chilly.”

“Thanks, Justin,” Em kissed his cheek.  He kissed James.  “Don’t argue with one of your employees.”

Emmett led James to the door and they both put on jackets before running out the back door to the vehicle parked to the side.

As they fell into the car the heavens opened up and Emmett nearly crawled over the counsel to kiss James. After they kissed for several minutes Em said, “We better never have kids.”

“Why do you say that?” James asked as he finally started the car and drove toward their place.

“I’d be so horny seeing you hold our child that I would always have a hard on.”

James was flustered. As good looking as he was he still didn’t know how to handle compliments. They were both silent until they were in the house. Emmett unbuttoned James shirt. “Why are you so surprised when I compliment you? You are the most beautiful man I have ever seen.”

“Em, the girls always said that kind of stuff but I wasn’t interested.” He was so soft spoken but when Emmett had pushed his shirt to the side and started a trail of kisses down his chest and when he dropped to his knees and started undoing James’ fly.  As his tongue traveled lower James braced himself against the sofa and before they both knew what was happening they had flipped over the arm and Emmet landed on top of James and then they both rolled off the sofa and ended up on the floor in front of the fireplace. James made short work of undressing Emmett and then James slipped on a condom and moved into Emmett.  

As usual there was nothing quiet about Em and as he went over he shouted, “Damn, where have you been all my life?”

Gently he dropped onto Em and then rolled over. Very softly he said, “I’ve been looking for you.”

“James, don’t say things like that unless you mean it. I’ve been disappointed too many times.  I have probably only really been in love once and that was with George and George….”

“I know how special he was to you.  And I know why you were special to him. I am not going anywhere and I can only pray you don’t leave me. For the first time in my life, I feel like I know who I really am.”

“You’re the man I love. The man I hope to spend many, many years together.” Emmett slipped so he was straddling James’ narrow hips. He took James’ hands and pushed them over his head and held them there as he moved down to kiss him.

“Do you ever wish you had kids? When I watch Justin and Brian with the boys I sometimes wish….I never thought two men could have a family together but now I kind of wonder…”

Emmett began to move gently back and forth allowing his ass to brush against James' rising cock. Changing the subject he said, “I’m ready to take a ride on my stallion.” He turned around so his back was to James.  He raised his ass and James manually positioned his cock so as Emmett grabbed his ankles, he lowered himself down on his erection. “I want a bucking bronco!”

James thrust to meet Emmett and soon they were both crying out again. “Emmett Honeycutt, I love you!”  It was barely out of his mouth and Em turned around and looked at the man below him.

“James Augustin, I love you, too!” Emmett drops down on him as James wrapped his arms around him. 

It was about 12:15 when Ronni arrived with Gus.  Justin had made lunch for them and the three sat down to eat.  Justin had made soup and crackers and cheese and some celery with peanut butter.  Aaron was asleep and Justin could focus completely on Gus for an hour. After tucking him in for a nap, Justin left Ronni in charge and ran through the rain to the pool house.  He had several projects started. He was painting a commissioned portrait for someone but had also started a painting of Gus resting his chin on the edge of the cradle looking at Aaron.  He had a deadline on the portrait so he focused on that this afternoon.  About 3:30, he heard someone come in and was surprised to see Brian standing in the door.

“What are you doing home already?” Justin set the paint brush down and walked over to Brian he put his hands behind his back so he wouldn’t get paint on Brian’s Italian suit and kissed him softly. Brian quickly pulled Justin’s shirt over his head so his arms were trapped in the shirt behind his back.  Brian now, all paint on the inside of the shirt behind Justin, pulled him close and kissed him. This time Justin’s toes curled as Brian’s tongue worked its way around Justin’s mouth and by the time they separated Justin leaned against Brian.

“So, are you sorry I’m home?” Brian looked down at Justin whose arms were still trapped behind him.

“I never said I was sorry but if you come home early it usually means one of two things.  Something very good happened or something bad did.”

“Well, Sunshine, I guess this could be both?”

‘What’s up? Besides me that is.” He rubbed his fly against Brian’s.

“Can we take care of that,” he reached down and slipped his hand into Justin’s pants “first?”

“Damn, Brian, you’re distracting me.” Brian pushed his pants down and as he did it Justin slipped his arms out of the shirt behind his back. Brian took time to grab a clean towel and placed it on the floor before dropping to his knees in front of Justin and then, slowly, took Justin into his mouth. Justin soon grasped for a stool that was nearby and with Brian’s assistance it was moved behind him so he could lean against it. It wasn’t very long before Justin was filling Brian’s mouth.  Brian took great care to tantalize out every drop he had to offer.

“God, Brian, you are so good at that. Now what are you trying not to tell me?”

“The good news is that the video meeting I had this morning was a great success.  It is going to be a multi-million dollar contract.  I mean this will mean a very LARGE bonus for Ted, Cynthia, and myself. I was thinking that Ronni could definitely use more help so she can focus on the kids and I really thought you might like a better studio.  I was thinking maybe the area above the garage.  It is big and bright.  You wouldn’t have to go outside if it’s rainy or really cold.  And the boys will be able to come up and say hi without going out by the pool.”

“That would be great, but what aren’t you telling me, Bri?” He got up and pulled his pants back into place. You are making me nervous.”

“Oh, Sunshine, I hate the timing but I have to go to the Netherlands.  I tried to get them to agree to doing all of this via conference calls but they said no.  The owner of the company is a bit old fashioned in his own way.   He wants me to do a gay focused campaign but he wants to meet me to make sure I’m gay enough for him.” Brian laughed. “If Aaron was a little older I would take you all along.”

“My doctor probably wouldn’t want me flying right now anyway. Please tell me you won’t be gone too long.”

“It will probably be 10 days to two weeks. I promise I will make it as short as I can.  I hate leaving you alone.”

“Well, I won’t be alone.  I have Ronni, and I have James and Emmett, not to mention Mom and Molly.”

“So are you saying you won’t miss me?”

“Damn, Brian, you know that isn’t true. I just don’t know if….”

“I already have Ronni checking on more help.  She knows a young woman who is in night school and she just lost her job.  Ronni has her coming in tomorrow.  She can focus on the kids and the new hire will be in charge of the house under Ronni’s supervision. You have given up so much already for our kids.  I don’t want any of this to affect you anymore.” 

“But if you’re not here it affects me. I know some of it is just my brain still acting up but…”

Brian looked into his eyes and saw something that looked like fear.  “Oh, Sunshine,” he pulled him close.  “Forget it.  I don’t have to go.  I’ll just tell them they will have to go with video conference or go with someone else.”

“Oh, Brian, as much as I would love to say to do that, I …..I cost you so much already and you said this was a big account.  It probably could make you millions over time.”

“Sunshine, you are worth more than any amount of money.  You know that, right?” He kissed Justin’s silky hair.

“Is Cynthia making the arrangements?”

“She is but…” Justin stopped Brian with a kiss. 

“You are doing this for our family. You’ll be back and we will be able to do more for our children.  If this is that big a deal it is worth it. Just don’t forget I’m here waiting, we’re here waiting. I mean there will be lots of opportunity for you to … well, Amsterdam is very free.  If you …”

“Don’t even think….you are the only….” Brian stopped talking and thought through what he was saying. “I understand why you question my faithfulness.  I was horrible before but…”

“Brian, you have been nothing but ….well, perfect, since you rescued me.”

“You rescued yourself.” Brian’s phone beeped and he pulled the phone out of his pocket. “Damn,” he said.

“What is it?”

“Cynthia booked my flight for the day after tomorrow.  I have to be at the airport at 6:00 a.m which means I have to leave about 4:30.”  He texted her back and put his phone back in his pocket.  “I told her to cancel everything on my calendar and if anything has to be signed before I go, someone will have to run them out here. I am sure I will have to work an hour or two tomorrow, maybe while Gus is at school, and the rest of the day is for you and the boys.”

“Brian, you are a good man.”

Brian looked around the studeo. “That painting of the boys is going to be so amazing.  And this one is going to make the family who ordered it …. It is just amazing.  It’s not as beautiful as our boys but that’s because we have the most beautiful kids in the world. I am going to miss them so much. Just hearing Gus say, Daddy, makes my heart melt.”

“How long are you going to be gone?” Justin walked behind Brian and wrapped his arms around his slim waist.

“She left it open ended because we don’t know. What am I going to tell Gus.  His moms just left and now….”

“Gus knows he’s loved and supported.  He loves Ronni and if Em and James spend more time in the house, he will have lots of attention and if he wants to sleep with me he can.  Let’s go find our boys.  They should be done with their naps by now.”

“Justin?”

“Ya, Bri?”

“I love you.”

“I know you do.” He gave Brian one of his winning smiles and led the way to the house.”

Brian spent the next day with his family.  He met Tracy, the new housekeeper.  She was a soft spoken woman of about 25.  She had gotten out of an abusive marriage and was now trying to get her degree.  Ronni told them that Tracy’s ex had gotten her fired by coming by her employer’s house daily.  Here it was private property and with the security they had put in place for Justin’s security when he was first rescued from Craig.  James already knew the story and said he would gladly keep a closer eye on the property.  Before she left that day, it was decided she would move in the house.  She didn’t have to live there but they had plenty of room and as long as her ex was a threat she may as well stay where she was safe. After thanking them over and over, James and Emmett followed her home to help her pack up her few items and they could move her few pieces of furniture in the back of the truck James drove when he was working around the estate.  There was an old shed that they could use to store what she didn’t want in her room.  

Justin and Brian spent as much of the day with the boys as they could and by bedtime. Gus realized his daddy was going away for a while.  “Daddy,” Gus pulled Brian down on the bed next to him. “Can I come, too?”

“Well, Gus, if you come with me, who will take care of Aaron? He needs his big brother to take care of him.”

“He has Daddy Justin.”

“Well, who is going to take care of Justin?”

Gus curled up  against Brian, “He is big.  He doesn’t need anyone to take care of him.”

“Everyone needs someone to take care of them.” Brian smiled at his son.

“Well, who is going to take care of you?” Gus looked up at his daddy’s face.

“It will be hard but I think I can make it for a few days alone.”

Gus held on to his arm, tightly.  “I don’t want you to go away.”

“Oh, Gussy,” Brian pulled him close. “I will miss you so much.  How about if we have meetings.  We can have a conference call some nights.  That would be just like I do at work. I’m special like your work?”

“Oh, son, you are so much more important than work.  I will call all the time to talk to you and your brother.”

“Aaron is too small to talk.”

“Well, then I guess you will have to tell me what he is doing.”

“Ok.  I can do that.” Gus moved so he was laying across Brian. Gus yawned.

“I think it is time for you to get some sleep. In a couple of days, I’ll call and we can talk on Saturday, alright?”

“I don’t want…” he yawned again. “I’m not tired.”

“I love you, Gus.”

“I love you, Daddy.”

Justin stood in the door as Brian talked to his son and then kissed him before tucking the blankets around him and walking out into the hall where Justin waited for him.  When Brian pulled the door shut Justin took him in his arms. “He’ll be fine. He knows how much you love him and he will have lots going on.  I’m the one who is going to have to go without.” Justin kissed him.  “Who's going to take care of me while you're gone.”

“No one, I hope.” Brian pulled Justin close and started to pull him to the bedroom.  “You know I would love to but Aaron is…” As if on cue, Aaron started crying. “He needs his final bottle and then….”

“You go get his bottle ready.  I’ll change him and bring him down. And after he goes back to sleep I will remind you why no man can do what I do for you.”  He swatted Justin’s tight ass as he stepped into the bedroom.

When Brian arrived downstairs with the fussy little boy, Justin had the bottle ready for him. They sat on the sofa side by side.  As Brian snuggled with Aaron, holding his bottle, Justin slid his hand under Aaron and rested it between Brian’s legs.  Brian spread his legs just slightly, giving Justin room to massage his cock and balls through his pants. 

Brian leaned over, kissing Justin, long and gentle, cradling their son between them. Justin placed a hand on Brian’s cheek and then traced Brian’s jawline. His mouth followed his hand and then his head rested on Brian’s shoulder.  “I’m going to miss you so much.”

Brian kissed Aaron, “I will be back as soon as I can.  I will show them a picture of my family and they will know why I need to get back.” As The bottle was drained, they sat silently for a few minutes.

“We better get to bed.  We need to be up by 3:00 or so.”

“And that is why that wee one is going to sleep in my room tonight.” Ronni appeared from her room.  “You will be getting up in five hours and this one will probably still be sleeping.”  

Brian and Justin both kissed the sleeping child and Brian passed him over.  “Thank you, Ronni.  We appreciate it.” Brian kissed her cheek.

Justin smiled at her, “I should be home before you need to take Gus to school or I can take him.”

“We can talk tomorrow morning.  I am guessing you won’t get much sleep tonight so we can see how tired you are in the morning.”  Ronni turned and carried Aaron  down the hall.  Brian instantly had his hands everywhere on Justin. They barely made it to the room before they had their clothes off.  They made love fast and furiously and then just laid together.  They didn’t talk, they just touched and kissed until they fell asleep. 

When the alarm went off at 4:15, they still lay face to face.  “Sunshine, you don’t have to come to the airport.  In fact it makes no sense for you to make that long ride.  Stay home with the boys, please.”

“But,...” Justin looked at Brian’s face and knew he was right. As Brian showered, Justin packed up a few of Brian’s last minute things and then he slipped a picture of the boys with him sitting on the sofa.  He missed him already. 

As Brian and Justin walked down the steps, Brian got a text from his driver.  He would be there in ten minutes.  Brian set the suitcases outside the door and then came back in and took Justin in his arms. “I’ll call you when I land.  Fuck, I hate leaving you so soon after….well, after everything that’s gone on. I just took responsibility for my son and I am leaving.”

“Well, I hope you think of him as our son.  You would do the same for Aaron.  And I have plenty of help.  Veronica is here and now we will have Tracy, not to mention Em and James. I’ll be spoiled by the time you get home.”

“I hope you have lots of time to paint.  I can’t wait to see the one of the boys finished.” Brian kissed him, letting his tongue slide over Justin’s until they both were nearly crazy, just as they heard the car pull up.  “Damn! I love you, Sunshine.  I will talk to you when I am settled in my hotel.”

“Come back to us soon, Brian. I love you.” They kissed once more and by the time Brian went outside, the driver had his bags in the car and they drove away.

Justin knew it didn’t pay to go back to bed. Without Brian the bed would be too lonely.  He almost got in bed with Gus but he didn’t want to risk waking him. Instead he pulled on sweats and a jacket.  He scrawled a note to Ronni that he was in the studio and he would be back in before she had to leave with Gus.

For the next three hours he worked on the painting of the boys. He was surprised when the alarm on his phone went off.  He threw his brush in a jar of cleaner and rushed back to the house.

“Daddy Justin, I was scared you were gone, too.” Gus threw himself at Justin’s legs. 

“Oh, Gus, I’m not going anywhere.” Justin picked him up and Gus wrapped his arms tightly around his neck. “I was just out at the studio painting.” Gus sniffed a few times.  “Have you had breakfast yet?”

Ronni smiled over at him, “He asked for scrambled eggs and they are just done.  I put some strawberry preserves on your toast.”

Gus  bounced back quickly now that he felt secure, “Yummy! I love strawberry.”

After Justin set Gus on a stool by the counter he glanced around, he saw Aaron asleep in his cradle and he could hear Tracy in the laundry. He was just going to ask Ronni if she had talked to James and Emmett this morning when the door behind him opened and the two men walked in.  He loved seeing Em so happy although this morning he seemed to be walking a bit slowly.

Ronni watched him and just shook her head but Justin saw the corners of her mouth go up.  He knew she was happy that her son was so happy.  And so their routine began without Brian.  They talked to him most mornings, at least for a few minutes while Gus ate breakfast and Brian was eating lunch.  Tracy was fitting in nicely.  She was an excellent cook.  Justin found out she was in culinary school which got Emmett’s attention also. He was working on his catering service and Tracy was very interested in helping as long as it didn’t interfere with her job and school work.

It was after the boys were in bed at night that Justin felt alone.  Brian had been gone a week and Justin was only sleeping a few hours a night.  He tended to fall asleep with Gus but he would wake up about midnight, after sleeping for about four hours and then he would go out and paint. He would doze on the sofa when he just couldn’t stay awake and then go back  in the house in time for Gus’ breakfast.

It was about 3:00 a.m. and Justin had just dropped onto the sofa.  He had finally finished the commissioned painting.  By the end of next week he should be able to pack it up and ship it.  As he began to doze he heard his phone.  He grabbed for it, hoping Brian was calling him before a morning meeting. As soon as he glanced at his phone, he knew it wasn’t Brian.  It was an unknown number but he answered it anyway.

“Hello?”  He heard what sounded like sniffling.  “Is someone there?”

“I was told this was Brian’s phone.  Is Brian there?”

“Who is this?”

“This is Claire.  I’m his sister.  I need to talk to Brian. Are you his….I don’t know what to call you.”

“Yes, I need Brian.  It is just terrible, I don’t know what we are going to do.”

“Claire, take a breath and tell me what is going on.”

“It’s our mom.  She had a stroke last week and now they tell us,” for the first time Justin realized she was drunk.  “She needs to leave the hospital soon and I don’t know where she is going.  I don’t have room for her and I have too many steps.  She can’t be alone.  I don’t know what to do.” He could hear her take another drink.  “Brian needs to do his part for a change.  I always have her. What’s your name? Jason?”

“Justin.  I’m Justin.”

“Is Brian there? I need to talk to…”

“Brian is out of the country for work.  He’ll be back in about a week.  I will have him call…”

“No, she needs to leave tomorrow.  What are you going to do?”

“Claire, it’s 3:00 in the morning.  Where is Joan? What hospital?”  She said the hospital name.

“I’ll call in the morning when there are people to talk to.”

“Justin, you need to take her.  I can’t do it anymore.  I have my own problems.  The hospital will call you in the morning.” The line went dead.

Justin stared at the phone.  He hoped this was a dream.  He was going to go to sleep and in the morning he was sure there would be no record of a call from an unknown number.  This just had to be one more bad dream because he was sleeping alone. 

Chapter 2

When Justin woke the next morning he picked up his phone, hoping he had drank a little too much the night before and had a crazy dream.  But as he reviewed his phone history, he could see he had received a call from Brian’s sister. Damn, what had she all said? Brian’s mom was being discharged from the hospital and she needed a place to go.  He pulled on his jacket and jogged to the house.  

As he stepped in he smelled fresh coffee but because of the headache that was creeping in quickly, he started making a cup of tea.

“That is not a good sign,” Ronni’s voice said from behind him. She had Aaron in a seat she set on the counter.  “You know if you would sleep in your bed, like a normal person, your headaches would not be coming back.”

Justin threw her a look but he knew she was partially right.  “I just...never mind.  I had a phone call in the middle of the night.  I really thought at first I was dreaming but this morning I realized it was real.”

“And who was this call from?” Ronni asked as she took over making his tea while Justin picked Aaron up from his little seat on the counter.  

“Brian’s sister.”

“Brian has a sister?”

“And what did satan’s spawn want?” Emmett asked as he and James walked in the door. “This can’t be good.”

“Yes, Ronni, he has a sister but he has no contact with any of his family.”

‘Family is family.  You can’t just get rid of them,” Ronni said flatly.

“But, Veronica,” Emmett said knowing where she was coming from. “These people are evil.  I mean my family wasn’t great but I still keep in contact with them with cards and a couple calls a year. Brian’s parents were abusive. When his dad was alive the only time he talked to him was when he needed money, which Brian always gave him.”

“Now he just sends his mom a check every month so he doesn’t need to interact with her.” And now Justin continued.  “She was obviously drunk but she said Joan had a stroke and now needed a place to rehab.”

“You didn’t tell her to bring her here, did you?” Em blurted out.  “Brian wouldn’t want that woman on his property.”

“When will she arrive?” Ronni asked.

“Ronni, I didn’t say anything.  Well, I said something but I wasn’t sure if I was awake or asleep myself.  I think she said the hospital would be calling me today.  She thought she was calling Brian.”

“Oh, honey, what are you going to do?” Em slipped an arm around Justin’s shoulder and with his free hand started stroking Aaron’s cheek.

“He is going to have them bring her here. She can have my downstairs room.” Ronni’s statement had a note of finality to it.

“Ronni, I need to talk to Brian about this.”

“No, you don’t.  He is not here.  She is family.  You are his husband, not staff.  She will move in.  Then you tell him and see his reaction.”

“Ronni, he is likely not to come home if he knows she’s here.” Em commented and he felt Justin tense.  “I’m sorry, but it is true.  He will come home but I don’t think he will stay here if she is here.”

A sleepy Gus wandered in.  Justin handed Aaron to Emmett and picked up Gus. After hugs and kisses Gus said, “What’s everyone talking about?”

Justin diverted the conversation, “We were just talking about what to eat for breakfast.  It’s Saturday so we can all eat a fun breakfast together. What are you hungry for?” 

With that the conversation was changed but as soon as Gus was involved in a conversation with James and Emmett, Ronni led Justin out of the room. “Call the hospital.  I will get the room ready. I sleep upstairs most of the time anyway to be near the boys.”

“Ronni, you don’t understand.  Brian was abused by his parents and the thought of her moving in…”

“Justin, she is a human in need. Period.”

‘Damn,” Justin just slumped. “I need to call and find out her condition and see if any of this is true.  We may not even be able to take care of her.  Claire is almost as messed up as her mom.” Ronni opened her mouth but Justin raised his hand.  I will be back in a few minutes if Gus asks.  

“Eat first and drink your tea.  I can tell you need it.  If you get a call I will make excuses.”

“You’re right, Ronni, but don’t take this wrong, you have to remember you work here.  Brian wouldn’t want to do it, but if you push him on this, you’ll be gone.  When it comes to his family, common sense doesn’t always win.  When it comes to his family, he is Gus’ age and he is still hurting.

“Daddy Justin, I heard you say my name.  Did you need me?” The four year old came running and Justin swooped him up.  

“Gus, I always need you.  You didn’t eat my breakfast did you?”  And with that Justin was done talking to her for the moment.  

After Gus had gone off with James and Emmett for an adventure and Aaron was down for a nap, Justin called Claire back.  He figured it was late enough that she was probably awake, although he was sure she felt worse than he did.

“Who is it? Is this you, Brian?” Claire was obviously sober now but that didn’t change her temperament. 

“It’s Justin.  I told you last night that Brian was out of the country.”

“I thought he just didn’t want to talk to me.  What would he be doing out of the country?”

“You have no clue what your brother does, do you?” He realized it didn’t pay to be snarky right now so he changed his tone.  “I need details about what you said last night.”

“I don’t remember exactly what I said.  I have been under a lot of stress with Mom in the hospital and of course my boys are always a handful.

“Claire, please, I have two boys of my own and right now I don’t have time for pleasantries.  You said Joan had a stroke.”

“Yes, the hospital says she needs to leave the hospital and have therapy but both of us have steps in our homes and she can’t do steps right now. Her insurance doesn’t cover rehab and she can’t afford all that.”

“Brian already sends her money monthly.”

“Well, sometimes a mother needs her son to be there for her.”

Justin stopped himself from saying what he wanted to say.  “Will her doctor talk to me?”

“I talked to her doctor earlier and told her to expect a call from you.  I can’t tell you everything that’s going on.  It has all run together.”

“Not too surprising considering how drunk you were last night.”

“Well, I don’t do that too often but it had all piled up on me.  I don’t get my child support and…”

“Do you have the number for me to call?”  Justin cut her off.

Claire gave him the number.  “Are you really raising your bastard half brother? I mean he’s the son of the man who told everybody you died.”

So she had followed the court case.  “Aaron had nothing to be said about who his biological father is and as you have been telling me, family is important.  You should be there for them.  I will always be there for Aaron.  He is our son.  Now, I have to go.”

After a quick shower and pulling on clean clothes, Justin called the doctor’s office and although she wasn’t available, they were expecting his call.  They expected Joan would be ready to leave tomorrow morning and they gave him a run down of what she needed.  They had set up someone to assist her every day right now.  Her insurance would pay that for a certain amount of time.  The person at the end of the line made sure they had a place for her that would be accessible as long as she needed help to walk.  By the time he got off the phone he just walked down the steps and dropped on a stool in the kitchen.

“Mr. Justin, is there something I can do for you?” Tracy said as she came out of one of the other rooms.                                                                                                                           

“I wish it was that easy.  If you don’t mind, could you put some water on to heat.”

Tracy was very perceptive.  She had learned what went on in the house quickly and found out about his headaches quickly.  Justin liked her.  They were the same age and she reminded him a little bit of Daphne.  He missed her but she was out of the city most of the time now.  “Well, it looks like my mother in law might be moving in.”

“I take it you don’t get along well?” Tracy made his tea while they talked.

“If I let her come, I’m not sure Brian will move back in and I doubt she will want to be here either.”

“Can I help?”  She put his tea in front of him and looked at the stool next to him.

“Oh, please, sit.  I hope you have realized we aren’t formal here.”

“That’s why I love it here.  I, well my ex, told me I would never be anything more than someone’s servant but now I am going to school and your house is so welcoming.  I feel so fortunate.  Just the fact that you are letting me live here and have security.”

“Well, I am sure you heard why we put the system in.”

“Yes, you have had a lot of trials.”

“But look around.  I have a very good life now. I have my boys. I love them all so much.” He had slowly sipped his tea. “Ronni insisted Joan come here to live and there is a part of me that says she needs help and we help people but Brian doesn’t see his mother like that.”

“I wasn’t eavesdropping but I heard Ronni talking to James about her having a stroke.” Justin heard the nervousness in her voice.

“Tracy, there are a lot of people around here. You are going to hear people talking. You are fine, and thank you for volunteering to help.  Joan will have assistance most of the day but I am not sure what the schedule will be.”

“Well, I have to think about my schooling but when I am available,” Tracy commented.

Justin kissed her cheek.  “Thank you. She is not a pleasant woman but worse than that, Brian can’t stand her.”

It was her turn to put her arm around him, “Justin, if you ever need to just vent, I’m here and I was raised by an obstinate woman.  From what I’ve heard, I have a feeling that our mothers are very similar.”

“Daddy!  Look what I have!” Gus came flying in with Emmett and James right behind him. Justin unzipped his coat as Gus held up a handful of treasures he had found outside. Tracy smiled at Justin’s interactions with his stepson and slipped out of the way.

Justin spoke to Ronni and let her know that Joan would be coming tomorrow but she was not staying in the main house.  With the help of James and Emmett, they moved his art supplies into the second story of the garage.  Tracy helped Gus help his dad as they carried some small canvases and containers of brushes and paints.  Once his stuff was out of the pool house, it was time for Tracy and Ronni to clean the place and get it ready for Joan.

Late that afternoon, Brian talked to Gus for a bit and then Justin got on the call.  “Gus said you were moving your art supplies, well actually he said paint stuff to the garage. I thought you were going to wait until we added some features up there.”

“Brian, you have any of that good pot they have over there on you?”

“Well, yes. I happen to be sitting in a little shop having a joint.  They don’t let you take it home here but why did you say that? What is going on over there?”

“Brian, I need you to listen to the whole thing before you talk.”

“Justin, what the hell?”

“Brian, your mom had a stroke.”

“Please, tell me she is finally out of my life completely.”

“Brian, please listen.  She is not dead. Claire called and told me about it.  She is getting out of the hospital and she is…”

“Don’t say it, Sunshine!  She is not welcome at my house.  I will not have her under my roof!” People at other tables were now looking at him in the cafe so he quieted down. “Tell me you didn’t tell that bitch she could come to live with us.”

“Brian, there is no other option.  Claire and your mom’s houses have steps.  She will be in the pool house and she will have help during the day….Brian are you still there?” The other end of the line had gone silent.

“Justin, no, I can’t….our boys cannot be exposed…..no! She can’t stay there.” The line went dead. 

Justin tried calling him back but he did not respond. “Damn!” Justin said as he ran up the steps to the new studio.  When he walked in James and Emmett were in each other’s arms.  Em’s hands had moved under James’ shirt.  “Oh, shit, sorry.”

“No, we are sorry.  This is your studio.” James still responded formally.

“Jamesy, loosen up.  Justin isn’t mad.  I think he is getting a little lonely though. Did you talk to Brian?”

“Yes, he just hung up on me. Em, he is not happy.  In fact, if he was mad I could deal with it.  When it comes to his mom, he goes into a whole different mind set.  I’m worried about him. He just…”

Em kissed James but then walked over to Justin and put his arms around him. “Oh, sweetie, I know you were worried about this. He may not be happy but he will come around.  We will all make sure she stays out of his way.”

“James, I know your mom has a mind of her own but...Brian isn’t playing with his need not to be near her or not to have our kids near her.  Please make sure she realizes that.”

“I will talk to her, Justin.  I cannot promise anything.  As you said, she has a mind and a mouth of her own.”

“We will try, honey.” Emmett said as he walked back to James.  “This is really a nice space. You have a lot more room and it looks like it would have good light...I think artists need that.  You just need to get a little furniture up here to take a break on and maybe a small fridge.”

“Emmett, would you mind taking care of that? I agree, a small fridge and dining room type table and then a larger work table and a sofa and a couple chairs.  It has to be sturdy and easy to clean.”

“Leave it to me.  I will send you pictures before sending in the order.  Can I just use the credit card  James has?”

“That would be great.  Thanks, both of you, for all your help. Stay as long as you want.  I am going to go spend time with my kids and try Brian again before I go to bed tonight.” 

Emmett and James watched Justin walk down the steps and out the door at the bottom. “I’m worried about him,” James said as he pulled Emmett close and kissed him. “I wish I could control my mother but I will definitely talk to her.  She is just so stubborn and thinks her way is the only way.  I know it is because of the way she grew up but she has to realize not everyone is like her.  How bad was Brian’s home?”

“I honestly don’t know because Brian won’t talk about it.  I am fairly sure Justin knows some of it but Brian would be angry if he told anyone.  Brian realized how special Justin was when he thought he was dead so I don’t think he would do anything too stupid but he could make it miserable for everyone.  I can deal with Brian’s tantrum but his mother might be another case.”

Later that evening James spoke to his mom and told her the pressure this was putting on Justin.  Emmett had agreed that was probably the best way to go about this. Ronni loved Justin and her heart went out to him.  His father had done a number on him. She agreed to back off a bit but she still believed that a boy should take care of his mother and she told him he better not forget that. He assured her he would always be there for her but she had always been there for him, too.

Justin had fallen asleep with Gus again but to his surprise he didn’t wake until 3:00 am.  He slipped out of bed and out of the room.  He had hoped to call Brian a couple hours earlier.  He had to try talking to him.  By now Brian could be involved in some activity since it was 9:00 a.m.  Hopefully, he would be sitting somewhere with a cup of coffee instead.

Brian hadn’t slept all night.  Every time he started dozing off his mother’s face flashed in front of his eyes.  What was Justin thinking? How could he think Joan Kinney being near their children was a good thing?  The next time he started to fall asleep, she had popped into his mind and he pictured her in a wheelchair needing someone feeding her.and wiping her ass.  He would never, never be the one that took care of her.  Hell, she never took care of him.

He had given up sleeping at 4:00 and went for a run.  He found out that probably wasn’t the smartest thing he had ever done.  He ended up in the red light district and had looked at the beautiful boys in the windows but he realized all he wanted was Justin which tore him apart knowing Justin and his boys were at home waiting for him but she would be there also.

Brian had walked to a nearby cafe and had just sat down with a strong coffee and his laptop when his phone rang.  He looked at his phone and saw it was Justin.  He hesitated but the need to talk to Justin was too great.  “Hey.”

“Oh, Brian, I’m so glad you answered.  Fuck, I’m sorry and I miss you so much and the boys miss you.  I think Aaron does, too. He is just a little restless and fussy.  He needs to be in his daddy’s arms.” Justin hesitated.  “I need to be in his daddy’s arms.  If you really can’t have her here, I will try to find some place for her but that is going to be so expensive.  When I talked to the hospital this evening they told me she doesn’t want to leave there.  Well, more like she doesn’t want to come here. So I am sure she will work hard to get out of here.”

“As long as I don’t have to deal with her, she can be there but I will not talk to her.  Hell, maybe she hates the idea enough that she actually will be miserable.  What am I talking about? She is always miserable.  If you aren’t miserable, you are doing something wrong.”

“Brian, when will you be home?”

“I told the president of the company I had a family issue that had come up so we will be wrapping up everything on Tuesday so I will be back on Wednesday around dinner. I doubt she would even want to see them but the kids are not supposed to go near her.”

“I have told everyone that already but I’m a little worried about Gus.  He is such a loving and friendly little boy.   At least it is getting cold outside so he won’t want to spend time at the pool. I will try to let him know he shouldn’t talk to you about her.  Maybe we'll just call her someone Ronni knows and tell him she is too ill to have visitors.”

“Well, that wouldn’t be a lie. She isn’t fit to be near children.  Why are you up at 3:00 in the morning?”

“I haven’t slept much since you've been gone.  I have been sleeping with Gus because our bed is just too lonely.”

“Where are you now?”

“I’m in our room.”

“What are you wearing?” Brian was talking very softly so those sitting around him wouldn’t hear him. 

“Brian, I just…”

“Sunshine, start stroking yourself. Lay in my spot on the bed.  As the bed warms up feel my hand run across your chest and then I’d move it down lower.”

“Oh, god….”

Brian noticed the guy at the next table was beginning to flush and, he couldn’t be certain but, he thought he was stroking himself under the tablecloth.  “Sunshine, I”d take you in my mouth and let my tongues play over the tip. My hand would slide between your legs. Do it.  Slide your finger in and out.  I know you can reach your prostate.”

“Oh, damn, Bri….” 

Brian heard Justin orgasm across the Atlantic.  “Sleep, Sunshine.  I will send you details about my flight home. I love you.”

“I love you, too, Brian.”

It was 10:00 a.m. when the gate buzzer rang.. Justin didn’t think it would be Joan yet.  An ambulance service was bringing her but that wasn’t supposed to be until near noon. He pressed the intercom, “Who is it?” He could see a woman holding up an I.D.

“I am a social worker with the hospital.  I was asked to come and check on the facilities for Mrs. Kinney.  I know you didn’t expect this but can I come in and speak to Mr. Kinney?”

“I’m afraid Mr. Kinney is out of the country.  I’m Brian’s husband. Follow the drive and I’ll meet you at the front door.”

As the small sadan pulled up, Justin opened the door.  The woman walked up and as she got to the door she stopped. “You’re Justin Taylor!” She said with great surprise.  That’s why Brian Kinney sounds familiar.  

Justin stepped aside and let her pass.  “I’m sorry, should I know you?”

“No you shouldn’t.  I put together information for your court case against your father, trying to figure out how he pulled off everything he did.  The hospital was grateful you didn’t press charges against us.  I truly don’t know what else the hospital could have done.  Your father just had connections with the wrong people.”

“That is over. What can I do for you?” He motioned for her to follow as he walked over to pick up a fussy Aaron. “My nanny is out with our other son.”  

“Justin, let me take him for you.”

“Are you sure, Tracy? The kids are not your responsibility.”

“He’s ready for a bottle isn’t he?” Tracy took the now crying child.  “I’ve got him.”  She moved away from Justin and the unnamed woman.

“So what can I do for you?”

“As I was about to say, this is such an odd situation. Claire set all of this up from what I understand but once it was all lined up and you had made contact to set up the arrangements, Mrs. Kinney, whose speech has been affected, was very upset.  She managed to write something that said she was afraid of her son. I truly just need to check out where she will be staying and I know she will be having daily help so I don’t think I will have to come back if you could just show me her room.”

“She is actually going to have the pool house. Tracy and Ronni, who has our older son right now, will be available to help her when she doesn’t have assistance.” He grabbed a jacket and walked out to the pool area. He crossed the yard and they entered the pool house. “This is where I finished my recovery after Brian rescued me so the bathroom has all the assistance bars.  You can see there is a small kitchen but she will have her meals brought from the main house.”

“Obviously, this is ideal for her therapy and recovery.  It is none of my business but it doesn’t sound like you plan to be spending much time here and from what her reaction was, I take it they don’t have a close relationship.”

“Brian may speak to his mother once a year and he gives her financial support monthly but the woman was a tyrant.  I have met her once, before my accident and I am not sure if she has ever met her grandson.  If she did it was when he was with his mother.  Brian will not allow Gus or Aaron to be near her.

“Why are you having her stay here then?”

“Well, I had to make a decision.  Brian will be back Wednesday and he may decide at that time he wants her to go to a rehab center but Claire said she didn’t want that either.”

“Mrs. Kinney is an unhappy woman, that’s obvious.  If you need help finding a rehab place feel free to give me a call and I can send you information.  It sounds like you do have support with two women in the house as well as the means to hire more assistance if needed.”

“Yes, and we have a caretaker and his boyfriend on the grounds most of the time.  The caretaker is in charge of security also.”

“I don’t think she is worried about people getting in.  She seems petrified of her son.”

“She should be nervous because of the way she raised him, however, fortunately for me,that isn’t the man he became.” Justin rubbed his temple, a habit he probably would never stop.

“Do you still have a lot of pain?” the kind woman asked.

“Stress seems to be a big trigger and with Brian out of the country and Joan coming and…”

“And how old are you, Justin?”

“21.”

“And you are raising your husband’s child and have adopted your biological brother.”

“Oh, Brian is here for me 1000% but he had to go out of town on this business deal because it could mean security for us for years and he has hired enough help that I can work on my art as well.  If life would only mellow out for a month or two for my head to completely heal.”

“Well, I do have to go but I will assure hospital authorities that Joan Kinney is going into a safe, secure location and she will have the assistance she needs. Oh, and just because I have been in this job a long time, be assured that as Joan goes through therapists, and my guess is she will, the hospital will work with you.”

“Thank you.  I have to say, this visit has made me feel a little less alone in this.”

When Justin got back into the house, Ronni was back with Gus.  They got Gus playing nearby and then Justin, Ronni, and Tracy were around the counter talking.  Justin sat with a cup of tea and washed down one of his pain pills at the same time. He explained what the visit was about. “I don’t want either of you to take anything from her.  If she gets unbearable, tell me.  Please keep it from Brian, for now anyway. He will be home Wednesday, and this is going to throw him.  I am sure he will step up and help with our boys but he just can’t deal with her, so I will take on that spot.  She can’t get in my mind like she can his.” Justin looked over at Gus, “Ronni, if it is alright with you, I am going to tell Gus Joan is someone you know and are helping out.  He doesn’t need to get into the middle of all this.”

“I hate to lie to the boy but I understand why we need to do this.” Ronni looked over at Gus, “If this woman is as you have said, I don’t want her to hurt him and he is such a sensitive soul.”

“I know. When I look at him I picture Brian at that age and ….well, I don’t look forward to dealing with her but I am going to make this as smooth as I can. And if it can’t work,” he looked directly at Ronni, “We will find a rehab for her. No arguments. Is that clear? Brian can’t deal with it and I’m not sure I can. Brian’s wellbeing will always take priority.”

“I understand,” Ronni said softly.  Justin’s loyalty to his husband had touched her.  “I will help her get settled when they arrive.”

“Thank you, Ronni.  Thank both of you for everything you are willing to do.”

Justin looked at Aaron in his cradle and then walked over to Gus and dropped onto the rug and as they played together, Justin told him about the woman that was moving in for a while.

“Daddy, will I be able to trick or treat to her house next week?”

“Oh, Gus, I don’t think so but I promise you will get to go to Uncle James and Uncle Em’s house and we will go to Grandma Jenn’s and Ted and Blake’s.  But I think we will need to leave this woman alone.”

“Can I give her a treat for Halloween?”   Gus asked in between making truck noises as he guided a dump truck down the carpet.

“That is very sweet of you, Gus.  I will find out if she’s allowed to have treats. Maybe drawing her a picture would be a nice thing to give her.”

“Do you think she will like it?”

“I’m not sure, Gus.  She’s been sick and you know sometimes when you are sick you get a little cranky.”

“Like when you have a bad headache and you ask me to be a little quieter?”

“Exactly.  You know I still love you when I have a headache.” He pulled the little boy into his arms.

“I know you always love me, even when I do something bad.”

Justin teared up.  He wondered if Brian could ever say that to anyone.  “Oh, Gus, you are so right.  I will always love you.”

Gus had just laid down for a nap and Justin was feeding Aaron when the ambulance arrived transporting Joan.  Ronni was out there directing them to the pool house.  Justin saw her place a hand on Joan’s shoulder as she sat in the wheelchair.  He saw her tense up and wondered what she was thinking.  He would go see her a little later. He understood how  frustrating it was not to be able to speak.  He knew how frustrated and angry he had gotten.  But he was not going to allow her to mistreat his staff, his friends. He would let her settle in and then have a conversation with her.

Ronni came into the house and sighed. She said something Justin couldn’t understand in her native tongue and then she walked to the stove and turned on water for tea. “Justin, that is a sad woman. I think she brings most of it on herself but I have to feel sorry for her. I can’t imagine living with that much inner struggle.”

“Did she want Brian?”

“Not exactly. She really can’t talk much but it is affecting her left side and she’s right handed so she is able to write.”

“And?”

“She said she is scared of Brian.”

“Scared?”

“The next thing she wrote showed she wasn’t scared of him, it was more a disdain for him.  How can a mother have such scorn for her own son? I have not heard of or seen Brian do anything that would deserve this.”

“The only thing Brian did was be himself and she didn’t like who he was.”

“Well,” she poured herself some tea and offered him a cup.  He shook his head and she continued. “As a mother, I, well, we all have hopes for our children and we don’t want them to suffer but I could never treat Jamie like that.”

“Brian has said they really didn’t want him.  The whole family has that negativity but Brian, rather than falling into the same trap, made up his mind he would be who he was and get out of there as soon as he could.”

“The therapist is going to be there until 5:00 and a nurse would be coming in at 9:00 for the night shift for at least a week.  After that they would have to reevaluate for the insurance.  I will go out and…”

Tracy was walking past on her way to a class. “I will be back at 6:00 and I plan to go back there until the nurse comes.  Ronni, can you cover the hour?”

“Sure but…”

“I’ll go if you don’t mind making dinner and keeping an eye on Gus.  I might just take Aaron with me and have a heart to heart with her.  I need to make the rules clear to her.”

“Justin, she is still Brian’s mother.”

“And as a mother, she knows there are rules that have to be put in place. Trust me she had her rules.”

Ronni placed her hand on his forearm and said softly, “I understand she hurt the one you love but remember what your mother taught you about being a good human being.  Make her proud of the man she raised.”

At 5:00 p.m. Justin walked back to the pool house with Aaron asleep in his carseat. As he knocked the therapist stepped out to talk to Justin. She didn’t have much to say other than the morning help would be here at 7:00 a.m. and all instructions for her care was on a white board they had put on the refrigerator. 

“So, there is nothing I need to do for her?”

“If you can figure out how to change her personality…. I’m sorry, that isn’t professional.  This has just been a long day. I will be back at noon tomorrow.  We are doing five hour shifts.”With that the tired woman walked away, and Justin took a deep breath before walking in the pool  house. 

Joan was sitting in a chair watching the TV. Her eyes met his for a second and she began to look away and then flew back to him. She realized this was not hired help.  She recognized him from the one time she met him. She then looked at Aaron.

“Hello, Joan.  I didn’t know if you would recognize me.  We met about four years ago. My name’s Justin and I am married to Brian.”

Joan pursed her lips and tried to say something. She finally gave up and grabbed her notepad.  She wrote the word, ‘wrong’.  

“Well, maybe we aren’t legally married in the United States, yet, but we are committed to each other and we plan to raise our children together. Can I get you anything?”

She shook her head.

“Ok, then I think we need to have a conversation. You are welcome to recover in this place.  You are not welcome in the main house.  You will have assistance with you at all times for now.  Someone from our staff will be here from 5:00 p.m. to 9:00 p.m.  During that time, whoever is here will help you with dinner.  They are doing it because they are kind human beings. You hurt them in any way and you will no longer be welcome here.” Aaron started stirring and Justin got him out of the seat and into his arms.  He also pulled out the bottle he had brought along. “This is Aaron.  He’s our youngest. I don’t know if you have ever seen Gus but he is four now. He is Brian’s son with Lindsay.  I know Jack met him before he passed away.”

Justin saw her writing something. She showed him the tablet. ‘Saw with Lindsay twice.’

“Does he look like Brian? Do you have any pictures of Brian as a baby? Brian said you didn’t. Brian said you didn’t like him enough to take pictures.”

‘I have some.  Was a busy mom!’

“I know what it is like to be a busy parent, especially when Brian is gone.”

‘Where is Brian?’

“Brian is in Europe for business.  He will be home on Wednesday.”

‘Know I’m here?’

“Yes, I would never hide anything from him.  I love him.  And he said ok because he loves me.  My mother raised me to respect mothers.”

‘I failed at that. My children don’t care’

Justin put Aaron over his shoulder and patted his back. “At some point you have to earn it.” He kissed Aaron and snuggled him close.  “If you follow the rules, you can stay here.  If you cause trouble in any way, I don’t care where you end up but you will  be out of here.” He looked her in the eye and said, “I hear you had lots of rules.  I really only have a couple of them.  Show respect to those working with you.  And do not, under any circumstance, interact with Gus. Brian may or may not choose to stop by but our son is off limits.  I never want him to be exposed to your type of hate.”

Joan started writing something but before she finished, Tracy walked in carrying a basket of food.  “Hey, Justin.  I got out of class a little early.  I’m fine until 9:00.”

“Joan, this is Tracy.  She will be here until the night nurse arrives. Tracy, there are notes in the kitchen.  Joan, is able to write if you have any questions.”  Justin threw the blanket over top of Aaron, and picked up the car seat  before walking out of the pool house.

Emmett was inside the door when he walked in.  “So how is Joan the crone?”

“She can’t talk but she knows what she wants to say.”

“Did you say everything you wanted to say to her?”

“I gave her the two rules I have for her. Be polite to all of you and under no circumstance  does she go near Gus.”  His voice dropped as he saw the little boy come into view.  “Are you hungry, son? I am starving.” He placed a now sleeping Aaron in his bed and stuck his hand out to Gus as they walked to the table together.

Tracy set Joan’s meal up on a small table and put it in front of her.  “Let me know if you need any assistance.  It is stew so there is nothing to cut up.  Ronni is an excellent cook.” Joan set the tablet to the side as she began to eat.  After they had both eaten, Tracy picked up the dirty plates and went into the kitchen to wash up the dishes.  When she finished she brought the clean plates out to the living room.  She found Joan dozing.  She picked up the basket to replace what needed to be brought back to the house and she noticed Joan’s notebook.  She flipped back a couple pages from when Justin was in here.  Of course she didn’t know what Joan was responding to but the last note before she had arrived.

The note Joan had been writing when she walked in was meant for Justin.  It said, ‘How dare you tell me what I can or can’t do, you little faggot! And why would I want to talk to Brian or that little bastard he fathered.  That child can’t be normal being raised in this house’

Tracy looked over at the sleeping woman.  What would cause this woman to have such hate in her soul? Justin had been hurt both physically and mentally in his life but he still found forgiveness for Chris Hobbs. Why was she so evil?

Justin was sitting by the fireplace in the living room when Tracy arrived.  “You survived? Grab a drink if you want one.” He sat with a whiskey in his hand.

“She wasn’t a problem.  She ate dinner and napped for a while.  When she woke up she asked a couple questions about who I was and then she watched a show.” She sat on the other end of the sofa and curled her feet under her body.

“Why do I get the feeling there was something else?” Justin asked as he sipped his drink.

“She had been writing something when I walked in. Do you remember what she was responding to?”

“I had just told her the rules.  She had to be nice to those helping me out and that she couldn’t interact with Gus for any reason.  Did she say something about that? Well, not say something but write something.”

“I think you have the right to know.  Basically she said she didn’t want to talk to either Brian or Gus and…”

“Just say it.” He downed the rest of his drink. 

“She said Gus couldn’t be normal being raised in this house.”

“Fuck her!  First of all she doesn’t know what normal is! But to call our sweet boy abnormal…. Does she want to see Brian?”

“She says she doesn’t.”

“Well, then I hope Brian visits her every day!”

Chapter 3

By Wednesday morning, Justin was like a small child with no patience.  By the time Ronni went to pick up Gus from school, she took Aaron with her because Justin would be heading to the airport before she returned. After she had left with Aaron,  Justin decided he couldn’t wait around the house alone.  He took a walk over to James and Emmet’s.  He wasn’t sure if either of them were there but it was worth a shot. A car was picking him up in about 45 minutes.  He didn’t want either of them to have to drive on the way home.

Justin knocked on the door and Emmett came to the door in a robe. “Honey, come in.”

Justin looked at his wardrobe, “Am I interrupting something?”

“Not now.  James left over an hour ago to go into town for a security update of some kind and I just woke up a few minutes ago. What are you doing here?”

“I just couldn’t sit in the house alone for half an hour before the car arrives.  I just can’t wait for Brian to be home.”

“You have had a lot of stress not  to mention being celebate for nearly two weeks. Brian better know how special you are.”

“I am just a man in love with a man and his family.”

“Oh, honey, you are so much more than that. You know Brian would be a mess without you.  He would have never taken Gus on by himself and the fact you have Aaron, too, and now the Crone… Have you visited her lately?”

“Not since I laid down the law and she said Gus had to be damaged.”

“He isn’t damaged.  He hasn’t had to meet her, yet.”

“And he never will. It makes me a little nervous having her there but right now she can’t walk so she can’t wander out. Gus wants to bring her a treat for Halloween. He is so sweet and she is so wicked.  I want to keep him untainted.”

“What did you tell Gus?”

“I said maybe he could make one of his beautiful drawings for her. Maybe that will help her feel something.”

“Are you sure she has a heart or soul to feel anything?”

“When I see her I wonder how Brian survived at all.” Justin looked at his watch.  I think I am heading back to the house.  Maybe the car will be a few minutes early.  I just can’t wait to feel him…” he stopped talking.

“Go get your man, Justin. Let us know if you need any help.”

The airport was over an hour away and Justin was nearly crawling in his own skin by the time he got out of the car.  The driver planned to park in a waiting area until Justin let him know Brian had landed. Justin paced in an area near the luggage.  He stared at the screen of arrivals and when he heard Brian’s flight called he almost forgot to breath. He hated this feeling and he hoped Brian wouldn’t go away too often.

Justin saw him taking long strides down the terminal.  Justin swore Brian was moving in slow motion.  As Brian took the last few steps he opened his arms and Justin threw himself at him. Brian’s bag fell to the floor as he held Justin against his body as their lips sought each other. They lost any sense of their surroundings as they held each other. “I am so glad you are home. I love you.  I love you so much!”

“I love you, too.  I have missed you and the boys more than I would have thought possible.”

Brian picked up his bag and they started walking toward the luggage carousel in silence, fingers linked. As they waited for his suitcases, Brian wrapped his arms around him from behind. Justin noticed he was quieter than Brian normally would be and he didn’t have to wonder why.

“She has help.  Ronni and Tracy take turns helping out for a few hours each evening.”

“You haven’t been there have you?”

“Actually, yes, I went there the first night.”

“Why?” Brian snapped at him.  He turned Justin around to face him. “I don’t want you near that… that….”

Justin gently looped his arms around Brian’s neck and kissed him.  “Emmett calls her Joan the crone.” Brian dropped his head down on Justin’s shoulder. “I wanted to give her the ground rules.”

Leaving his head where it was he softly said, “And what were the rules you gave her?”

“I only gave her two.  I told her she had to treat those helping her politely.”

“Like she even knows what that is.”

“Well, so far, she can’t talk so there hasn’t been an issue yet.”

“So what was the other rule?”

“She never speaks to Gus.  She doesn’t go near him as she starts moving better. And I told her at any time she could be sent to a rahab.”

“Damn, I knew I loved you even if you let my mother move in while I was gone.”

“You know I didn’t have a choice.”  He pressed his pelvis against Brian’s. “What the hell is taking the luggage so long?”

“Did you park the car?”

“My darling husband, I hired a car and before we are off the airport property I expect to have your cock down my throat.” 

An older man standing near them looked at his wife, “You hear that, honey.  Are you going to do the same thing for me?”

“If you looked like him I would?” She smiled at her husband and kissed his cheek.  “It is obvious he is taken.  I guess I’ve had you for 40 years, I’ll keep you for another few.” 

Finally, the luggage belt began to move and Brian focused on locating his cases. Soon they were in the back of the car and the driver was putting the luggage in the trunk. Their hands and mouths were everywhere and by the time the driver got in and put the window up between the front and back, Justin was straddling  Brian and Brian’s shirt had been unbuttoned.  

“Damn, you are so gorgeous.”

“Brian, tell me you won’t have to be gone like that again for a long time.”

“No, Sunshine,  I miss you and boys too much to be gone after a couple days.  I told my new client I would make one short trip annually.  We will go as a family.” Brian unzipped his own fly and then did Justin’s and he positioned himself as Justin lowered himself onto his erection. As he took the discomfort Justin arched and as he settled onto Brian’s thighs, they began to move slowly. They didn’t want to rush.  They both wanted to feel every move. As they both grew close to cumming they could no longer hold back. 

Justin’s mouth landed on Brian’s and they both lost themselves in the feel of each other as they slid over the edge. 

They redressed and sat in each other’s arms as they continued, now slowly, as they hit rush hour traffic. “Tell me about the boys.  How are they doing?”

“Aaron has grown.  I think he has gained another pound and Gus, he can’t stop talking about you.  He missed you so much, almost as much as I missed you.”

“You haven’t been taking care of yourself.”

“Well, I have been a little stressed.”

“How are your headaches? I know you weren’t telling me the truth when we talked.”

“They have been about the same. I actually think it is getting better when I am not stressed.”

“But you have been stressed since I left.  I should never have gone.  I should have told him to find someone…”

“Brian Kinney, you just made millions for your family.”

“I made plenty to get my mother out of our life. I will get her out of there as soon as I can.”

“Brian, I don’t want her to leave.”

“What the hell? Justin, she is nothing but a pain.”

“Well, that might be true but she hates being there.  She hates feeling reliant on us.”

“I get the feeling you are not telling me everything.”

“Well, it’s what she said about Gus.”

“I thought you said she couldn’t talk.”

“Well, she can’t verbalize but she can write.”

“She didn’t threaten him, did she?”

“No, she knows she really can’t DO anything but she basically said Gus couldn’t be a normal kid because he was being raised by us. Like she would have a clue about raising children.”

Brian didn’t say anything.

“Bri, don’t let her get to you.  I just want her to see from her view what a loving family looks like.  I swear Em has nearly screwed James in the cold just so she might see them and be horrified.”

“Well, maybe I’ll take you pressed against the glass door.” Brian tried to make it sound light but Justin heard a dark threat in it.

“Darling, I understand, I do, but I think killing her with kindness or indifference is much harder on her. I have smiled and waved at her a couple times.”

“Sunshine, what would I do without you?”

“Brian, you would be just fine.”

“No, I wouldn’t.  If you hadn’t survived…. If you had really been dead….”

Did I tell you she did remember me? She remembered that morning she came by with a cake.” Justin laughed. “We had been fucking for hours and I could barely walk. She had been horrified.”

“That was the first time she had to face that I was gay and…. I wasn’t even aware of it yet but I had found the man of my dreams.”

“I love you, Bri.”

“I love you, too, Sunshine.”

Brian laid down with his head in Justin’s lap and napped the rest of the way home. 

Justin ran his fingers through Brian’s hair as he slept.  He was so much like Gus and in so many ways  he needed so much more than his son.  Gus never doubted he was loved and cared for.  Brian always doubted he was worth anyone’s love or care.

“Brian, baby, we are almost home. Gus is going to be so excited.  I’ll worry about the luggage you hug your boys when we get there.”

“I have never felt so pulled about being home.  It’s just daunting knowing she is there.”

“She can’t go anywhere on her own. Hopefully she will be gone by Thanksgiving or we can find a place for her to go by then if she can’t go home.”

Brian sat up slowly and kissed Justin. “Damn, I have missed that so much.”

“Napping?” Justin asked him.

“No, kissing you.” Brian put a hand behind Justin’s head and kissed him thoroughly. Before they separated the car was stopped. By the time they opened the car door, the house door flew open and Gus came barreling out. Brian took two large strides and then Gus was flying into the air and back into his daddy’s arms for a long hug and a kiss.  Justin stood by the car and watched his husband and son embrace and he was almost overwhelmed with love. The driver walked up beside him, snapping him back into reality.

“Oh, let me help with those.  I’ll take these.  Could you just put that big one on the steps?” Justin took out his wallet and handed the driver a $100 bill.”

“Thank you, sir. I will leave it in the entry.”

As Justin walked to the door, James stepped out.  He immediately reached for the bags Justin was carrying. He dropped them inside and turned to go back out for the last piece of luggage. “I’ll take that,” James reached for the large suitcase. Their eyes met and James said, “Len?”

“Hey, James,” the two men hugged. “I wondered where you have been hiding!”

“I’m not hiding. I just found a great job…”

“And the love of his life.” Emmett walked out of the house and saw ‘his man’ with someone else.

“Hey, Emmett.  Come meet an old friend.” Emmett walked over and draped a proprietary arm around James. “Em, this is an old friend of mine.  Len, this is Emmett.” The two men shook hands.

“I remember you from Babylon, don’t I?” Len asked.

“Oh, I remember you, too.  I think we danced a time or two.”

“Ya, I thought you looked familiar.”

“Didn’t you recognize Brian?”

“Of course I did.  Everyone knew Brian Kinney.  He is as beautiful as he ever was.  When I picked up his husband, I thought I recognized him.  I remember seeing him a couple times at Babylon and who could forget his tragic attack.  He looks so good.” Len said with a gleam in his eye.

“Don’t let Brian hear you say that about Justin.  He might have you for dinner.”

“He can have me for dinner anytime.” Len said and all three of them laughed. 

“Len, do you have a place to go? I am trying a new dish for dinner and I have plenty.”

“Em has his own catering business.” James said, pulling Emmett close.

“Is he as good a cook as your mom? Where is your mom these days?”

“She’s inside the house.  She is their nanny and house manager.”

“Let me make a quick call and see if I can keep the car for a couple hours.” While Len stepped away James pulled Emmett close, “This would be our first house guest.”

“Shit, did we leave our briefs in the living room?”

“I picked them up before we left.”

“My boss said the car is free all night so he said I just need to be back by 10:00.”

James kissed Emmett once more, “Why don’t you ride with him back to the house.  I will get the luggage into the house and make sure they don’t need anything.  I’ll be back there soon.”

“Oh, Daddy, I am so happy to see you.  I missed you so much. Look at Aaron.  He is such a good baby brother.  Ronni took me to school every day.  I learned about the difference between a dog and a wolf….” Gus rambled on and on as Brian just held his son. He was brought back to his surroundings when Gus said…”lady moved into the pool house.  She’s a friend of Ronni’s but they don’t act like friends.”

“Gus, why don’t you let your dad take a breath and hold your brother. I could use your help setting the table.  I bet Brian is hungry.”

“Daddy, are you hungry?”

“I am starving, Gus.” Brian smiled at Ronni and nodded at her to thank her. He picked up Aaron and found himself drawn to the patio doors.  He stood there and as he kissed Aaron’s chubby cheek, he saw his mother sitting in a chair looking at the house.  He shivered as he saw her standing up and grasping at the door. It was as if she felt his presence. She pointed a finger at him before someone was at her side and assisting her to another spot.

“Brian, you Ok?”  Brian didn’t seem to even hear him.  Justin gently slipped an arm around his waist, “Bri, are you alright?” The look on his face said everything Justin needed to know.

“Daddy, dinner is ready.” Gus came over and Justin picked him up. “Ronni said time to eat. You said you were starving.”

Brian’s smile didn’t reach his eyes until Justin tickled Gus just a bit and when he giggled the light came back. Gus leaned forward and Brian kissed his son’s nose.  He then moved to Justin’s mouth and savored it for a moment.  “It smells so amazing, Ronni.  The Dutch know how to cook but they don’t have the spice you do.”

Ronni put the food on the table but left the family to dine alone.  Brian and Justin both chatted with Gus and each other as they ate dinner.  Once Brian had eaten his fill, he fed Aaron his bottle while Gus finished eating.  The little family sat on the sofa for a little while as Brian read Gus a story but soon both Gus and Brian were ready for bed and Aaron was already sleeping. 

As soon as the boys were in bed, Brian and Justin got in bed, too.  Justin knew Brian was tired and he also knew he had to find out what happened earlier. 

Brian laid his head on Justin’s chest after they had made love. “I’m sorry, Sunshine.  I’m not very exciting tonight. I promise I will make it up to you tomorrow.”

“Brian, this is perfect. We’re perfect. You’re perfect.” He kissed the top of Brian’s head.  “What happened before dinner?” Justin felt Brian shiver.

“When?”

“Brian, you were holding Aaron by the door and I could swear for a split second, you were no older than Gus but you weren’t the happy little boy he is.”

“I just spaced off.  Jet lag.”

“Bullshit.  You were staring at the pool house. Did you see her?”

Brian’s hand traveled down Justin’s abdomen and a finger started traveling down his treasure trail.

“No fair distracting me. Did you see her?” Justin stopped his hand from moving through his pubic hair. 

“No, of course I….” Brian stopped talking.  “How can she do it?

“Do what, darling?”

“I swear she was in my head telling me what a disappointment I was to her.”  Justin stroked his hair hoping he would keep talking. “She was looking at me like she did when I was in trouble. I’m sure she wanted to brow beat me.  My house wasn’t good enough.  I don’t have enough help. I deserted her.”  His voice fell off.

That was it, Justin thought. “As horrid as his mother had been, he still feels the pangs of wanting her love.”

“Brian, she doesn’t know how to love.”

“She loves Claire.  Claire shows her the respect she needs.”

“Where is Claire now? Your mother has been here for four days and she hasn’t stopped by. Your mother can’t call her, can’t order her around.  She is probably enjoying her freedom.”

“She hasn’t been here?”

“No, she hasn’t been here.  I called her the first night to tell her your mom had arrived.  She never responded.”

Brian’s hand began to play gently with Justin’s cock and then he moved his head down and took it into his mouth. 

“Damn, Brian, that feels so amazing.”  Brian gently sucked as his tongue danced on and around the tip. When he began stroking Justin between this cock and asshole Justin had to fight for restraint.  He wanted this feeling to go on and on and yet he felt guilty for having so much pleasure while Brian was in so much anguish. But at least he was distracting him. Justin arched as he filled Brian’s mouth.

Brian was very quiet when he moved back up and as he laid his head on the pillow, he pulled Justin close, “I love you, Sunshine.  Thank you for being here.”

“Where would I be? If it wasn’t for you, I wouldn’t be here.  Who knows what I would be doing. Living above the little bodega, still fighting to increase my walking and my fine motor skills?” For a moment Justin felt for Joan.  He knew what it was like to have to learn all that over again.

Before Justin came out of his own thoughts, Brian was breathing deeply and as Justin tried to move a little bit and Brian tightened his grip on Justin.  “I’m not going anywhere, darling.  I’m staying right here.”

“Wow, Emmett, that meal was amazing.” Len sat by the table with James as Em. James wrapped an arm around Emmett and pulled him close for a kiss.  “So how long have you been together?”

“It’s been about three months.”

“Watching you I would have thought it was more like three years.”

“When you know it is right, it’s right.” James commented and Em’s heart skipped a beat.  He had never loved someone the way he loved James.”

James got up and poured each of them a drink. The old friends continued to catch up.  James asked him about his driving job. “It’s not bad but it isn’t what I want to be doing in ten years.”

“I have actually taken some landscaping and horticulture classes.  I seem to have a knack for designing gardens. There isn’t work here, is there?”

“Not this time of year but next spring there might be.”

“Well, keep me in mind if you need help.  I think I could get used to living in a place like this and eating food like that.” Len took the last sip of whiskey. “I better get the limo back to the city.”

“You’re good to drive, right?” Emmett asked.

“That one small drink isn’t enough.  Thanks for the meal.” Len patted Em’s back and then he hugged James.  Emmett tensed, thinking the hug went a little longer than he liked.  

As the car pulled away, Em looked at James’ face. He then turned on his heel, walked to the door and locked James outside. He leaned against the door and waited for James to knock.  He hoped James knew how to play games like this. He wasn’t really mad but he wanted James to realize where his loyalty should lie and if he had anything to say about it, that man would never live on these grounds and better yet, not work here.

“Em, what’s the matter? Why did you lock me out?” James' low, husky voice came through the door.

“Were you and Len a couple?”  Em said through the door.

“No, Emmy, I told you I have never been in love until now.”

“Did you hook up?”

“Emmett, I don’t care who you have been with. I’m with you now.”

“You know you just answered my question.  I just fed dinner to one of your lovers!”

Rather than getting louder, James spoke softer. “Emmett Honeycutt, you are the only man I have ever loved.  You are the man I want to grow old with.” His voice got even softer, “You’re the one I want to make love to for the rest of my life, no, our lives.”

Emmett unlocked the door and fell into James’ arms. “Oh, I love you, James.” Moments later the door was locked and James was chasing Em into their bedroom as clothes began to fly.

Ronni pushed through the door to the main house.  Tracy was standing in the kitchen when Ronni let out a string of words she didn’t understand. Tracy poured some water over tea leaves and handed it to Ronni.  Ronni walked to the bar and poured some rum over top of it.

“What did Mrs. Kinney do this time?”

“That woman...how dare she tell me I wear too much makeup. What difference does it make to her?”

“I can go out the rest of the week.  I don’t have any more classes at night this week.  I guess I may not be able to be back right at 5:00.”

“The woman could sit alone for an hour. Maybe Brian will want to spend some time with her.”

“Ronni, remember, Justin said don’t ask him, no matter what.  And I think I understand now.”

“I can’t believe I am saying this but I understand why that man doesn’t want to see his mother.”

“Do you ever wonder what happened to someone like her to make her that way?” She poured a little of the alcohol into her cup. 

“I don’t care what happened to her.  My life wasn’t all roses but I would have never exposed Jamey to what I had to live through.  I would have given my life for him in a heartbeat.  That woman doesn’t seem to care about anyone but herself.  She had no right becoming a mother.”

“I wonder what the sister is like.” Tracy commented as she sipped her tea.

Ronni drained her cup and looked at her, “We’ll find out Saturday.  She’s coming for a visit.”

Tracy’s head snapped toward Ronni, “Holy shit, does Justin know, or Brian?”

“I just found out so if they know she contacted them.”

“I have a very bad feeling about this. Why do I feel so sorry for Justin?”

“Justin is so young to deal with all of this.”

“At least Brian is back and, well, I know I am here to support him.” She quickly added,   “We both are here for both of them.”

“Tracy, you aren’t falling for Justin, are you?”

“Of course not!” she said a little too quickly. She then added, “Of course you have to admit him is beautiful to look at and there is nothing wrong with looking. I better get to bed.  I will be up early to do some cooking for the next week and then I have the afternoon class.”

“We’ll talk in the morning.  I’ll have Jamie and Em come up for breakfast and between four adults someone should be able to be near the pool house for that hour. You are brave, volunteering to take most nights.”  With that the women went to their own rooms saying goodnight as they moved out of the kitchen.

Brian lay awake.  Part of it was the time change but part of it was knowing that his mother slept just a few yards away. He got out of bed, being careful not to wake Justin.  After slipping on a robe, he stood and stared at Justin for some time.  His hair was mussed and his skin seemed to glow in the light from the window.  He moved out of the room and peeked in to see Gus curled up in a ball.  He quietly walked in and covered his boy up, dropping a kiss on his cheek and then moved out.  He moved into Aaron’s room.  He stood at the window for a few minutes.  It overlooked the pool area and he could see a slight glow from the pool house.  

Brian was transported to the house he grew up in.  He had to be about Gus’ age and he was in trouble again.  He couldn’t remember what he had done but the main thing was he hadn’t faded into the background like he usually tried to do.  His mother got angry and told him to sit and shut up.

Brian didn’t remember doing it but he realized he was now holding Aaron against his chest. Aaron was half awake and reached up to touch Brian’s mouth. “You will never, ever have to worry about anything like that.” Brian kissed the boy’s downy head and as he sat in the rocker a tear rolled down his cheek. “You are so loved and you will always know how much you are wanted.”

Brian rocked gently and as Aaron went back to sleep, Brian’s mind went back to that day when he was about five. He had been told he would have to sit in that spot until his father had arrived home.  He had wet himself because his mother told him he couldn’t move from that spot. Claire had come home from school and snickered at him.  She slipped upstairs and out of her mother’s rage.  Later she had come down and made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for her dinner before going back upstairs.  Eventually, when his father hadn’t arrived home and it was his bedtime, his mom ran a bath for him and berated him for the laundry she would have to do.  He almost wished she had just spanked him and sent him to his room.

Aaron made a soft sound in his sleep, snapping Brian back to reality. He realized his cheeks were wet from the tears he hadn’t realized were still flowing.  He wasn’t sure he could live here with her so close to her children. He knew he could take care of himself now but….

Justin woke and reached for Brian only to find emptiness.  Where had he gone? Justin turned toward the stairs but then heard a soft noise that caught his attention.  He walked toward the nursery  and then realized the sound he heard was the rocking chair. He looked in and in the glow of the night light he saw Brian with Aaron.  Brian’s eyes were open but he didn’t seem to be seeing anything. He walked over and dropped to the floor by Brian’s feet and rested his head in Brian’s lap.  “Brian, are you alright?” He felt one of Brian’s hands in his hair. After he had been there several minutes he looked up, “Let’s put this little guy to bed and get a little more sleep ourselves.” 

Justin stood and let Brian kiss Aaron before he took him out of his arm.  Once the baby was tucked back in his bed, Justin slipped an arm around Brian and they walked back to their bedroom. They both took off their robes and before they got back in bed, Brian pulled Justin close.  He clung to him and Justin wrapped his arms around him.  Justin felt Brian’s body tremble slightly after a few moments he softly said, “We’re both cold, Let’s get in bed.” Justin walked Brian to his side of the bed and got in with him.  He pulled the blanket over both of them and then brought his mouth to Brian’s. After a gentle kiss he said, “Baby, you don’t have to decide now but if she is going to do this to you, you can face her or find another place for her to stay. She is not going to do this to you. Not when I am around! There is no way you could be a better father than you are.”

“Why do I let her do this to me?” Brian was absorbing the heat from Justin’s body and it was obvious he was coming out of his funk as his cock pressed against him. 

“Because she was your mother and was supposed to be the one you looked to for approval.  That’s what instinct tells you to do but she failed you.” Brian began to slide up and down against Justin who offered Brian his back and Brian pressed in.  As Justin relaxed and allowed the invasion Brain continued to move close and as his pelvis pressed tightly against Justin’s ass and Brian pressed his mouth against Justin’s ear.  “I love you, Justin. Thank you for loving me.”

“Damn, Brian, I didn’t have a choice. I loved you the first night but more importantly, I loved you the day you came and found me.” 

Brian started moving and slammed into Justin, over and over and soon they both were in a world that only belonged to the two of them. As they climaxed together, Brian kissed Justin’s neck and holding on to Justin tightly he went to sleep.

Justin was up with the boys before Brian woke up.  He was suffering from jet lag and the emotional strain of having his mother on the grounds had drained him.  As Gus ate breakfast between Emmett and James, Justin sipped on his coffee while Aaron cooed in his arms.  

“Alright, we will need someone to spend an hour or so with Joan this evening.  Tracy is off to a class and will get back somewhere between 6:00 and 6:30. She will take over when she gets back but…”

“I need to talk to her.” Everyone jumped at the sound of Brian’s voice. 

“Daddy, you’re awake!” Gus ran to him and Brian picked him up and hugged him.

“I can’t sleep the day away.  I have been out of town so I feel like it is my turn to sit with Ronni’s acquaintance.”  He walked over and sat down next to Justin, putting Gus on his lap.

“Daddy, I don’t think she is a happy lady.  But tomorrow night is Halloween so I want to bring her…”

“Gus, you are not to go near that pool house!” Brian snapped at his boy and instantly hugged him, “I’m sorry, Guster. I didn’t mean to sound mean.  I just have heard she is pretty sick so we don’t want to bother her.”

“It’s Ok, Daddy.  You love me, even if you sounded mad.”

“Oh, you can’t imagine how much I love you.” Brian held on tightly to Gus.  “Do we need to get you a costume?”

“No, Ronni is making me one.  She said I would put it on for a final filling tonight.”

“I think you mean fitting.” Justin smiled over at Brian and Gus.

“Ya, that’s it.”

“Well, now that’s settled, How about you try on your costume before we take you to school?” Ronni led Gus off to her room to put on his costume. 

“Brian, are you sure? I can sit with her.”

“I need to do this. It is time for me to be a man.”

“You proved that last night, more than once.” Justin smiled at him. 

Tracy brought a plate of food for Justin and Brian. “Can I hold this beauty while you eat?” Tracy took Aaron into her arms.

As Brian and Jusitn ate, Gus tiptoed out and then jumped at Brian and made a grrrr sound.  He stood in a dinosaur costume.  All the adults assured him he was scary and that he made a great T Rex and then it was time to leave for school, he was back in his normal clothes. Tomorrow he would take the costume to school with him.

Once Brian and Justin finished eating Tracy passed a sleeping Aaron to Brian and she started working in the kitchen. “I better go into the office for a while.”

“Brian, I thought you would stay home the rest of the week.” Justin said as he sat on Brian’s lap carefully, not wanting to jar Aaron.

“I need to get some paperwork to the office and do just a few things.  You and Aaron could come with me. We will be home long before 5:00. I know Cynthia would love to see Aaron.”

“That sounds great. I haven’t been in the city for a while. Maybe we can go to Primanti Brothers for lunch?”

“If we do that, we won’t need dinner.  On second thought, we will pick up dinner and bring it home with us.” As they left they let Tracy know they would bring dinner home and Brian and Justin left with Aaron.  

When they arrived at Kinnetik, Brian went into his office and Justin stood by Cynthia as she held Aaron and snuggled with him. “Justin, he is growing so quickly and he is such a sweetheart.”

Justin smiled, “Ya, he is such a good baby.” He took a deep breath, “Cynthia, I know he is coming home with me in a little while but you need to know, Joan moved  into our pool house after having a stroke.”

“Oh god, Justin, How did that happen?”

“I wasn’t really given a chance.  Anyway, I just don’t know what to expect from him.  He is going to talk to her tonight. I don’t really want him to but he insisted and the more I think about it, it might be what he needs.  He needs to know he is still in charge.  She has no power.  She can’t hurt him anymore.  Too bad the 5 year old Brian is still deep inside him and wants approval from his mommy.”

“Oh, that isn’t going to be easy but, Justin, you hold his heart now.  She doesn’t hold the power she did when he was a child and I agree, I think meeting with her will do him good and it has to feel good that it is on his turf. He has done so well for himself.” 

Justin kissed her cheek. “Thanks, I needed that. Now, I need to place an order for us to pick up.  Is there a phone…”

“I’ll take care of that. Just give me the order.”

“Cynthia, you don’t have…”

“I know I don’t have to but I will and you better go show that baby off.  Everyone wants to see him.”

Brian sat at his desk working on a little paperwork.  “Hey, Brian, I’m surprised to see you here this morning.”

“You needed these papers so I thought I would drop them off.”

“They could wait until tomorrow.”

“I know but tomorrow is Halloween and I want to be around for Gus.”

“So have you seen her?”

“Hell, Theodore, that took you less than five minutes to get into my shit.” Brian snapped at him.

“Brian, I….”

“No, I’m sorry.  I am going to meet with her tonight and I know it is going to be …..” He walked over and looked at the bar but then pulled a bottle of water out of the mini fridge and drank most of it. “I’m going to talk to her tonight and I am not going to let her make me feel like shit and I am not going to play into her guilt.”

“Brian, come here and look at that young man out there.” Brian looked out and sawJustin talking to one of the young men in his art department who was making Aaron smile.  “Justin is the most intuitive person I have ever met and he has known since the first night he met you that you were the man he needed to make his life complete and it is obvious how good he is for you.  Live for the future not in the past.  I have known you for, what, about 10 years? You know as well as I do, your life came together the day you let him touch your heart.  Don’t let your past take that away from you.”

Justin could feel Brian’s eyes and looked at the office.  He moved Aaron’s hand so he waved at him. “Thanks, Ted, you’re right.  I need to face the woman who gave me life and tell her she has no power over it now.”

“Exactly, now, let’s get this paperwork sorted so you can go face what was and go on to what will be.”

“You better watch it, Theodore.  You are getting philosophical in your old age.” Then he softened his voice, “Thanks, Ted.  I know I can always count on you, too.”

An hour later, Brian walked out of his office.  He had finished up what had to be done this week and the rest would wait until Monday.  The rest of today was for his family and tomorrow was Friday and Halloween so it was going to be Gus’ day and he would see how the weekend played out.  He knew his sister was coming Saturday but she was coming to HIS house and his rules were the only ones that counted.

After stopping to pick up the sandwiches and salads, Justin and Brian held hands all the way home as Aaron napped in the back. “Damn, I missed you.” Justin said as Brian drove.  “Obviously, I missed you in bed but I forgot how much I just like being with you.”

“I never forget how much I need you.” Brian kissed Justin’s hand.  “When will Gus arrive home?”

“He is probably home already. Why?”

“I was hoping we would have time to…”

“There is always time for that.  Gus always takes a nap when he gets home and we should have an hour and a half before you go to the pool house.”

With Aaron secure with Ronni, Brian and Justin stripped and were soon in bed.  Justin started at Brian’s face, kissing his forehead and then each eye and then his tongue trailed along Brian’s jaw but before he could move further down, Brian flipped him over and had him on his stomach before he realized it. Brian straddled him, pinning his wrist above his head and after he had licked and kissed every inch of his upper back he moved lower and lower until his tongue slid between Justin’s cheeks and as his tongue began to probe Justin’s bud, and as Justin arched cumming hard, Brian started laughing. 

Justin looked over his shoulder curiously, “Brian, are you Ok?” He rolled off Justin and laid on his back continuing to laugh. “Bri? What is it?”

“I just decided I really need to greet my mother with a kiss.  And then tell her I just had my tongue up your ass.”

Justin had to laugh along with him. Soon they were in the shower and thirty minutes later they were downstairs.  Gus had woken and Justin sat on the floor and were building a tower with blocks.  Brian walked over and kissed Gus and then kissed Justin.

“Love you, Brian.”

“I love you, too, Daddy!” Gus wrapped his arms around his dad’s neck.  “We will wait and eat those ginormous sandwiches when you come back.”

“Thanks, Gus, but if you get too hungry you can start without me.”

“No, I will wait.  Ronni just gave me a snack. I want to eat with both my dads.”

“I love you, both.” And with that Brian walked out the door and went to meet with his mother.

Chapter 4

Justin got up and watched Brian walk toward the pool house.  Justin could see the hesitance in his strides.  “Daddy, what ya’ doing?”

“I’m just watching your Dad walk.”

“Why are you doing that? He knows how to get to the little house.”

“Yes, he does but when you love someone, sometimes you just watch them.”  Gus jumped on the sofa and looked over the back so he could see Brian, too.  “What are you doing, Gussy?”

“I’m just watching someone I love.” Justin sat next to him and gave him a hug.  

“I love you, Gus.  Your daddy loves you, too.”

“I know!  Can we play now?”  Gus went back to the rug to build his towers.  Justin had to smile and as Brian turned the knob to the small house, he turned and sat next to Gus.

Brian walked into the small living area that used to be filled with Justin’s art work and now there was an oppressive cloud over it.  “I hope you are Brian? Joan hasn’t stopped talking about you since yesterday.” Brian glanced and saw his mother wasn’t in the chair he expected her to be in. “She is in the bathroom right now.”

“I am sure she wasn’t happy about me coming.” 

“Well, she definitely wanted you to come by.  I just am not sure why.” She saw Brian’s look.  “That sounded wrong. She just, to put it bluntly, seems to want you to be here so she can be angry with you.”

“Welcome to my world.”

The nurse looked at her watch. “Well, I need to go.  She can walk around here with the use of her walker.  Her speech isn’t fluid.  She is starting to get out one or two words but most communication is through pen and paper. I,” the bathroom door opened and Joan walked out looking frailer than the last time he had seen her which makes sense. “Well, Joan it has been nice working with you.  Good luck in your recovery.”

“You aren’t coming back?” Brian asked a little nervously.

“Yes, the agency will be sending someone new.  Don’t worry, they only hire well trained staff.”

“But…..” Joan started writing as she got to her chair and the nurse opened the door.

“Someone will be here at 9:00.” and she was gone.

Brian heard a tapping behind him.  He turned and saw his mother tapping her pen on the paper to get his attention. “Well, hello, Mother.” Joan held the tablet out to him with her good hand. Brian took the book from her. ‘Where have I been? I am sure Justin told you I was in The Netherlands.”

‘You didn’t come see me.’ was scrawled on the paper.

“Mom, I have been home about 24 hours.  I haven’t seen or talked to you since Mother’s Day.  I didn’t think another day would matter.”

‘I’m a sick woman,’ she wrote.

“You had a stroke.  Could that be from your drinking?”

‘Are you even sober now?’ Joan asked him.

“Don’t act like you know anything about me.  I may have a drink in the evening but it is after dinner when the kids are in bed and my husband and I….” He stopped talking when she started writing.

‘Not husband. Can’t marry a man.’

“Mom, we did get married. Just because the country we live in still has archaic beliefs... “ He took a breath. “I am not going to go there. I hear you have a problem with my sons, too.”

‘You have one boy, a bastard.’

“Don’t you dare ever say that.  My son has four loving parents and he knows he is loved by all of us.”

“Huh,” she said verbally.

“I know that is something you don’t know much about.”

“Rude.”

“Oh, you think I am rude. If I am, I learned it from a pro.  You are one of the rudest people I have ever met, not to mention cruel and heartless.

She wrote again, ‘What would you expect when I deal with such a disrespectful child?’

Brian turned and looked out the door.  He could see a fire burning in the fireplace and saw Justin’s blond head knowing Gus was right next to him.

“Well, Mother, I had enough respect to let you move into my home.”

‘This isn’t your home.  This is a building behind the mansion you live in.’ She rushed the message on a tablet.

“You are right, as usual.  This is the pool house to the mansion I live in.  And, by the way, that I own.”

Writing again, she said, ‘You wouldn’t have let me stay. That child you sleep with set this up.’

“Oh, ya, the child I just got done rimming about half an hour ago.”

She was writing again, ‘Rimming?’

“Oh, yes, not a term you would use.  I had my tongue in his asshole.” Joan made a noise Brian couldn’t recreate. He was fairly sure she shivered. “I hear my dear sister hasn’t visited yet.”

‘Tomorrow.’

“Yes, I know she is coming to visit you tomorrow.  I plan to talk to her when she is here to see when she can take over your care.”

‘Has been good daughter.’

“Because she has no backbone. She fled the house like I did as soon as she could and she needed you to watch her kids so put up with your shit.”

“Language,” she said to him.

“Claire would have been by here already if she really wanted to show you how much she loves you.”

“Busy!”

“Oh, ya, I’m sure.” Brian turned and looked at her.  “I know you will never acknowledge your shortcomings.  I actually woke in a panic last night, knowing you were so close.  I know I can deal with you now but I have an impressionable little boy I need to protect.”

“Baby.”

“Oh, yes, I heard you met Aaron.  He is such a good baby.” Brian’s face softened when he thought about the little boy.

“Weak.”

“If showing that you love someone is a weakness, yes I am weak and I hope I always have that weakness.”

She wrote again, “Gay.  You are weak. Disappointment.”

“I think you are confused as to what gives a person strength. Just seeing Justin with the kids gives me strength. Knowing I have friends that live nearby that love my kids, too, gives me strength.  Hiring people to be around me that become part of our family, that makes me stronger. Making love with the man who loves me, who would give his life for me, that is what love is all about.”

‘Always could talk pretty. Always looked pretty.  That was your problem. Pretty on the outside but ugly is deep inside.’

Brian threw his head back and laughed out loud.  “You can’t hurt me anymore, Mom.  I don’t need your love anymore. You have lost all the power over me. It just hit me how pitiful you really are.  Mom, you will never know what you are missing out on. All I can hope is that the agency sending nurses has a large employee list because no one gets paid enough to spend that much time with you! Hopefully you will recover quickly so those poor young adults won’t have to be affected by you.  You are just a sad woman who wants everyone else to be miserable.”  Brian saw his mother wince as if she had been struck. He stopped.  If he went on, would he be any better than she was?

Joan sat and glared at Brian. She started to write but Brian took her notebook away.  “I think you should learn a little bit more about your grandkids.  Grandma’s are supposed to want to know about their grandchildren.  “Gus is a great little boy. He is so loving.  He is always ready to give or get a hug.  His moms taught him that but Justin, damn I love that man. He may be young but he is more mature than I will ever be.  His mother taught him how to love and how to be loved. There should be no strings attached to being loved. I mean think about it.  The father who told everyone he was dead fathered another child, and rather than having that baby be adopted, we are raising him.  He is and will always be ours. He is Aaron Daniel Taylor Kinney.  Neither of our boys will ever need to look for love. And in 20 years hopefully they can find someone half as good as Justin.”  Brian had been looking out the door while he talked but now he turned and looked at his mother.  Her eyes were closed and he was fairly sure she had gone to sleep.

Brian’s emotions were so mixed up.  He knew as much as he hated his mother, the little boy inside him still loved her.  He pulled a blanket off the sofa but as he gently laid it over her she woke up with fear on her face yelling, “No! Don’t touch me!”

“Well, looks like your speech is coming back quicker than we thought it would.” He turned, grabbed his jacket and walked to the door. “Do you really think I would hurt you? That’s your thing not mine.”

Once outside, Brian stood there.  He knew he couldn’t leave her alone.  Justin had just fed Aaron when he glanced out and saw Brian storm out of the pool house. “Ronni, can you…” Justin was just going to hand Aaron over when he saw Emmett and James walking up. Emmett turned and walked toward Brian while James came in the house.

“Brian, you alright?”

“Fine!” Brian snapped but then he patted Emmett’s shoulder. “Sorry, I’m just….”

“Brian, I know you and would probably not be friends if we didn’t share so many friends. But because we do, I think we have come to appreciate each other.  We both have family issues but we both have learned to be the best homosexual we can be and if our family can’t deal, we have each other.  Go be with the family that loves you.  I’ll stay with Joan the Crone until Tracy gets here.”

Brian opened his mouth but then closed it.  He looked at Emmett and said, “Thanks, Emmett.” Brian hugged and kissed him before walking back toward the house.

Emmett walked into the small house and looked at Joan who had been glaring at the door, watching Em and Brian talk and then kiss.  

“What are you scowling at, Joan? You just can’t stand to see your son happy can you? Actually, you can’t stand to see anyone happy. Joanie, who hurt you so bad that you can’t deal with happy.” Joan started writing something. “Lady, I don’t care what you think you have to say.  Your son is one of the best people I know.  He will help anyone who needs real help. And you know that, he is making it bigger than you could ever dream of.  Be quiet and deal with it!”  With that Tracy walking in and Emmett left without another word.

Justin opened the door for James. “Is Emmett up for this? We both know that Brian and Em aren’t…”

“Emmett’s heart is in this.  I wouldn’t want to be Mrs. Kinney right now. You know what he’s like when he is on fire.” James looked out the door to the spot Em and Brian were standing.

Justin smiled at James, “You really love him, don’t you?”

“Of course I do.  He knows I’m committed to him.  We are just going to wait and make it official when it is legal. We don’t have kids like you do.  I understand why you wanted to get married, even if it really doesn’t make a difference these days.”

“I’m glad you two found each other. Emmett is going to get you to loosen up and you ground him.”

That was when Brian kissed Em and started walking back to the house. “James, will keep an eye on Gus?” He nodded as Justin grabbed a jacket and met Brian. Justin pulled Brian into his arms and Brian clung to him. “Hey, gorgeous.   I am so proud of you!”

Brian didn’t say anything but brought his mouth to Justin’s and kissed him. “Let’s go get those sandwiches we bought today and our family can have dinner together as soon as Em gets here.”

“I love you, Brian.”

“I know you do and so do our boys and you know I love all of you. That woman is my past.  I don’t give a fuck if I ever see her again. In fact, I would prefer that.”

A few minutes later Tracy stopped by and picked up dinner for her and Joan and then Em came waltzing into the main house. “I need a drink and something amazing to eat.” Softly he said to James, “I’m planning on you for dessert.” James kissed him and they all sat down for dinner. They kept the conversation light and everyone listened to Gus’ excitement over Halloween. 

It was contagious and as dinner finished up, they decided they were going to have a party tomorrow night.  As James helped his mother straighten up the kitchen Brian, Justin and Em were calling friends  to come over tomorrow night. Then Ronni and James called a few friends and soon they were expecting about 40 guests that would be coming. Em and Ronni started planning the food and drinks.  Michael and Ben would be coming as well as Blake and Ted.  Cynthia and her current boyfriend would be there as well as several others from Brian’s office.  Jenn was coming but Molly already had plans so they promised Molly could come for a weekend very soon.  Justin was glad to hear Jenn was bringing a date and Brian made a note to call the nursing agency to get someone to cover the 5:00 to 9:00 shift so Tracy could join the party. 

James and Emmett left to enjoy ‘dessert’ at their own place and Brian took Gus to his room and read him a story.  When it was just Ronni and Justin who was feeding Aaron, she asked, “What happened between Brian and his mother?”

“I honestly don’t know. I didn’t ask for details.  He was shook up and he knows if he wants to talk he can but I don’t want to push him.”

“Justin, you know I was a little opinionated about your way of life when I started, well, more Jamie’s choices, but that’s not here nor there.  Brian would be lost without you and after meeting his mother, I know why he needs you. I hope the party takes some of the weight off his shoulders at least for the night.”

“Yes, it will be a lot of fun. I am trying to figure out what costumes we should wear. Oh, well, I think I am taking this little guy to his bed and see if Brian is going to head there, too.”

“Oh, Justin, I really enjoy Tracy and she is such a good help.”

“Why do I hear a but coming?”

“It isn’t really a but however, I want you to be aware that I think she has a crush on you.  You have never given her any reason to think you would be interested but I wanted you to know.”

“Thank you, Ronni.  I will keep that in mind if a situation comes up.  What would we do without you, Ronni?” He kissed her cheek and along with Aaron, he went upstairs. As he put Aaron down, he felt arms come around him. He laid his head on Brian’s chest and then turned to kiss him. He took his hand and led him to their room. Justin could see how weary Brian was.  He was sure it was a mix between jet lag and meeting with his mother. All he wanted was for Brian to relax and get a good night's sleep and tomorrow forget all his worries for a change.

“Sunshine, I hope you don’t mind but I am really tired.”

“Bri, of course I don’t mind. We made love this afternoon.  I am just happy you are laying next to me. You have been so busy since you got home you haven’t even seen my new studio.  I know I moved it in a hurry but I really do love it. Em had furniture in there for me the next day. I did finish the painting of the boys.  Maybe it will be dry enough tomorrow to bring it downstairs for the party.”

Brian’s head was resting on Justin’s shoulder and he listened as Justin talked softly about different things. As he started to drift off he said, “Thank you.”

“For what, darling?”

“For just being here and letting me just be.”

Justin kissed the top of his head, “Sleep.  Tomorrow we have a party to plan.”

Brian looped his arm around Justin’s waist and drifted off.

The next day was full of activity.  Gus had left in his dinosaur costume and he had given his dads and Ronni directions for planning the party.  His direction for Ronni and Justin had to do with decorations and food but his directions to Brian were more specific.  He told his dad he was in charge of costumes for the rest of the family. Brian promised to do his best and now he was committed. As soon as Gus left Brian was on the phone.

It was about 10:00 when Brian came out to the kitchen. “I am going into town to pick up our costumes.  Do you need anything?”

Justin slipped his arms around Brian’s neck and pressed himself against him. “I can think of a thing or two.”

Brian kissed him, “Now if I do that, our costumes might be given away.”

“Ooo, what did you decide on?”

“I’m not going to tell you.  All I’m going to say is it will work with Gus’ dinosaur.”

“Do I need to practice my T-Rex growl?”

“I’d rather be practicing that ‘ass-enter groen’ you have but that will have to wait.” Brian kissed him again and then took a chance at glancing at Ronni.  ‘Sorry, Ronni.  I know you aren’t comfortable with sex.”

“Oh, trust me, Brian, I am very comfortable with sex, but my sex life, not someone elses.” She smiled at the two men who she had come to care about. “I actually put an order in at the grocery store.  Can you pick that up? It will be ready by noon?”

Brian glanced at his watch and did a quick calculation.  “Noon should be a good time.  I will try to be back around 12:30. Do you want me to pick up lunch?”

“We are going to be eating so much tonight.  I was thinking I might just have a salad for lunch.  Do you want me to make you one?”

“That sounds great.  I’ll let you know if it is going to be much later.” Brian put a hand on each side of Justin’s face and tilted it up before bringing his lips down to meet his, “Maybe we can have lunch in your new studio.”

“I like that idea.” 

“I love you, Sunshine.”

“Love you, too.” They kissed once more before Brian left on his adventure.

Justin walked back to Ronni and picked up where he left off.  Eventually, Ronni said. “He is in a good mood today.”

“Ya, I think he put to rest some of his demons last night. And he really does enjoy a good party. He slept well last night and now …..I love this side of him.” Justin’s voice had a light hearted feel to it.

This made Ronni smile.  “You deserve some good vibes.” She squeezed his shoulder as she switched to another project for the party.

As the morning turned to noon, Justin fed Aaron and put him down for a nap before he started making a salad. “Ronni, do you mind keeping Aaron while we eat lunch? We’ll be back down before you leave to get Gus.”

“Sure, the angel will probably sleep the whole time anyway.”

“He is a great baby, isn’t he?”

“Jamie was a good baby, too.  He needed to be.  I was alone, raising him.  He often came along to work with me and sat in a basket while I worked.  He still has that patient demeanor. I sometimes wonder if he is too quiet but I think Emmett is bringing that part of him to life.”

“I am glad you can see that.  They do love each other.”  With that, Justin put their lunch on a tray.  “Can you send Brian up when he is ready?”

“Of course, take some time for the two of you. You haven’t had much of that since he got back.”

Justin smiled as he walked up the stairs into his sanctuary.  He looked around and smiled.  Emmett had outdone himself.  He had been very restrained for him.  There were neutral colors throughout with splashes of color in pillows and chair coverings.  He had picked a plush rug by the sofa so if Aaron and Gus were spending time up there they had a comfortable place to play.

There was a small table that could be used for sketching or to eat at.  The one thing that hadn’t arrived yet was a Murphy bed.  Emmett had suggested it.  He had said, ‘If you are working and realize it is 3:00 am and you don’t want to wake Brian, you can sleep there or if he just pisses you off enough for you to leave his bed, you have this little place.’ Justin had wanted to say that would never happen but he knew it would.  

Justin heard Brian pull in below and remembered they needed to check into a ventilation system up there.  Between the ability to have car fumes get up there and the fumes from his paint and other mediums, he would feel better if there was some kind of filtration, especially if the boys were there with him.

It was about fifteen minutes later that Brian knocked on the door at the top of the stairs.”Come in.”  While he waited he had put the frame on the portrait of the boys he had made earlier.

Brian took a couple steps in and started looking around, “Wow, this looks great! How did you get…”  Brian stopped when he saw the painting in its frame.  “That is  stunning.” He walked over to it and looked at his boys.  Can we put it over the fireplace?”

“That is what I was thinking. As for this place, Emmett gets all the credit.” Justin pointed to the back corner, “A Murphy bed will be in that back corner.” Brian walked over and handed Justin a small bouquet of flowers and kissed him.

“I hope you don’t plan on staying up here often.”

“I hope to start having more consignments and then if I end up working deep into the night, I don’t want to wake you up.  I can grab a nap.”

Brian pulled him close, “You know I don’t mind being awakened as long as you love me.” His mouth moved to Justin’s neck as his hands moved under his shirt.

“Damn, Brian, I have always loved you and I am always ready to be loved by you.” Brian grabbed Justin’s ass and lifted him off the floor as Justin’s legs went around his waist. Brian got them to the sofa and it wasn’t long before both had their pants around their ankles and Brian was bent over Justin. His arm was wrapped around Justin’s shoulders and was moving in and out of him as Justin supported himself on the arm of the sofa. Justin arched as he lost control causing Brian to cum, also.  “Shit, I was hoping to keep the sofa clean.” Justin laughed as he turned to kiss Brian.

“Think of it as a christening.  It is now officially ours.”

“Emmett made sure it was scotchguarded.” Justin laughed as he grabbed a paper towel and cleaned up the sofa. “Did you work up an appetite?” He pulled out the salads and some sparkling water.  

As they ate they talked about putting in a ventilation in the studio and then they talked about the party and what still needed to be done.  “Oh, did you get our costumes?”

“I did! I can’t wait to see you in yours.”

“Bri, you did remember my mother will be here, right?  What did you get for us?”

“I think it will be a surprise.  It will be a twist on an old favorite but I'm not going to tell you, yet.  I can’t wait to  see Gus’ reaction.”

“Brian, that’s not fair.” 

“Life’s not fair, Sunshine.  If it was, I wouldn’t have lost you for two years.” Brian squeezed Justin’s hand. “Do we need to get downstairs so Ronni can go get Gus?”

“Ya, if you don’t mind going down to Aaron, I need about 10 minutes to finish the frame on the back.”

“Take your time.  I can handle the little guy for a while.” Brian grabbed the dishes and moved to the door. 

Justin watched him and before Brian pulled the door shut, Justin stopped him. “I love you, Brian. Don’t ever doubt that.”

“That’s what keeps me going, Sunshine. My life couldn’t be any better.”

The afternoon was full of activity and excitement.  Brian still hadn’t shown Justin their costumes but most everything was ready now.  All afternoon Gus had been asking to bring a Halloween picture to the old lady in the house.  Ronni had put him off and finally she said, “You will need to ask your dad, Gus.  It is up to Brian.”

Gus ran to Brian’s office where he went to check his emails from work, “Daddy, Daddy, you in here?”

“Yes, Gus, I’m in here. What has gotten you oso excited?”

“No one has taken me to the old lady to give her my Halloween picture I colored for her.  Ronni said you had to give your approval.”

“Gus, I don’t want…” he took a deep breath.  He didn’t want Gus to think he was angry.  His son had such a big heart. “Gus, come here and sit with me a minute.” Gus walked over and he picked him up, setting him on his lap.  

“Daddy, you're not mad at me, are you?”

“Oh, no, I’m not mad at you.  It is just hard sometimes to explain some things to someone your age but even though you’re young I think you can understand.  This lady, she’s not sweet like your grandma Jenn or like Ronni and Tracy.  She is someone who just isn’t very happy.  I am not sure what she will say when you bring her a picture and she can’t talk very well right now.  I just don’t want you to feel bad if she doesn’t like it.”

“Daddy, why is she so grumpy?”

“You know, Gus, I really don’t know the woman but I will go out there with you, Ok? And if she is grumpy, what do we care? We have a party to go to tonight.”

“Daddy, can we give her some candy? Maybe she would like some of that? Candy always makes me happy?”

Brian hugged his son and tickled him just enough to make him giggle. “Oh, Gus, why don’t you go ask Ronni, nicely, to put together one of the candy bags we are going to have for tonight and then you go get your picture.  I will be there in a few minutes.”

Gus turned and hugged Brian.  “I love you, Daddy.”  And Gus was gone.

Brian heard Gus’ excited voice as he talked to Ronni.  He started thinking about the conversation he had just had with his son and realized how true his words were.  He really didn’t know his mother at all.  What had made her the way she was? What did he know about her side of the family? Nothing.  He knew nothing about the woman who gave birth to him. 

As he helped Gus with his jacket and pulled a sweater on himself, Ronni said, “I can take Gus to see my friend.” 

“Thanks, Ronni, but I got this.” Brian took Gus’ hand and as Gus pulled on it, he looked at Ronni, “She needs to know I won’t take any of her shit when it comes to Gus.  I don’t give a shit about me but ….” and with that Gus pulled him out the door.  He swooped Gus up on his shoulders as they walked the short distance to the pool house.  He saw his mom looking out at them as they moved. Brian put Gus down and knocked on the door. 

As the new therapist opened the door, she smiled down at Gus, “Well, hello there.  What is your name?”

“I’m Gus.  I have some Halloween treats for the lady.”

“Well, Joan, isn’t that nice.  Gus has brought you something for Halloween.”  Brian took a step into the doorway so he could make eye contact with his mother.

Gus took a step toward her. “I drew you a picture and I brought you some candy.  Everyone likes candy, even if I only get it for special occasions. I get lots of other good things.” He walked over to his grandmother and put the picture and bag of candy on the little table next to her.  

She finally broke the gaze with Brian and looked down at the dark haired little boy next to her.  She started to open her mouth but then she just nodded at him.

“Ok, Gus, let’s leave the lady alone.” As they walked out the door the therapist followed them. “Gus, why don’t you go back to the house and tell Ronni to start getting you in your costume. Stay away from the edge of the pool.”

“Ok, Dad. don’t be long.”

“I won’t, son.” He turned toward the therapist. “How did today go?”

“She is a hard woman but so am I.  I just wanted to let you know she is doing quite well.  From my evaluation today, I think in the next couple weeks we will be able to cut back on the therapy.  She didn’t say anything now but she has been talking more today and she is walking better around the house.”

“Did they leave detailed notes?”

“They did but I met your mother when she was in the hospital. She has come a long way.  I am thinking by the end of next week, she should be able to be here alone part of the time as long as you are this close.”

“I am not sure….” Brian started to tell her that she couldn’t say here when Gus called out the door.

“DAD!”

“I need to go.”

“Someone from the agency will call you next week.”

“I’ll talk to my sister this weekend and see if she can have her at her place.  I am sure Joan would prefer to be there.” Brian waved and jogged toward the house.

Brian couldn’t be happier.  His mother was doing better and she would get out of here soon.  He saw Ronni was helping Gus with his costume and said Justin was upstairs with Aaron. Brian took the steps two at a time. He walked in their room and saw Justin on the bed with Aaron.  

“You look happy about something.” Justin said as Brian dropped onto the bed and kissed Aaron’s chubby cheek. 

“We are going to have a houseful of people in half an hour and I get to see you almost naked as you put on your costume.”  Brian slipped his hand into Justin’s lap. 

“Speaking of the costume, can you show me it now?” Brian kissed him and squeezed his crotch just enough for him to sigh and then got up and picked up the clothing bag and unzipped it.  “First, this is Aaron’s costume.”

“Brian, Aaron is six months old what kind of….”  Brian held up something that was cream and speckled that sort of looked like a pillow.  “What exactly…”

Brian set it down and unzipped a zipper down the front and then picked up Aaron and slipped him into it, zipping him up in it. “Oh, I get it, since our other son is a dinosaur this one is a dinosaur egg.  I have to say, that is really cute. So what did you get for us and what has gotten you in such a good mood.  Did you take something? I heard you went out to your mom with Gus.  Did you take something ahead of your visit?”

“I didn’t take anything. He pulled out two costumes. Both of them looked like animal skins. One was solid brown and the other was orange with black spots. He laid them on the bed and then pulled out a plastic club and a large plastic bone.

“We are going as cavemen.  Ok, I get it.  Dinosaurs, cave people.”

“Not just any cave people.  I always thought Fred and Barney had something going on the side.  At least in my fantasy world they did.”

“Well, if anyone can pull it off it’s you and me.” Justin pulled his shirt off as he walked to Brian and then undid his fly. “This costume leaves a lot of airflow.  What are you wearing under it?”

“Oh,  I am fairly sure loin clothes are just like kilts.”

“I don’t think I am going all natural with my mom at the party but, darling, if you want to go for it.  I might take advantage of you.” 

“Damn, I’m not wearing a thing.” Brian stripped naked and slipped the fake animal fur on. 

Justin, in his own caveman costume stepped close and slipped his hand under the fur and found Brian’s bare ass.  “You are going to be one big distraction tonight.”

“I sure hope so.” As Brian pulled him close Aaron began to fuss.  “We’ll hold that thought until later.”

As Brian picked Aaron up off the bed, he said, “By the way, Joan is progressing well and tomorrow I hope I can get Claire to take her or I’ll get her resettled into her place with help. The main point there is, she will no longer be my problem and I plan to celebrate tonight.”

“Go ahead, Brian.  I’ll enjoy myself but next time I’ll get blotto and you can be on daddy duty.”

“Thanks, but I won’t get so drunk that we can’t continue what you started a bit ago.”

Just then Gus came growling through the door. “You look like cavemen! I can chase you.” And the family went down to greet their guests.

Gus had fun running around growling and everyone taking pictures of the little dinosaur with his brother still in his egg. And everyone oohed and aahed over the portrait.  Brian and Justin mingled, meeting up for a kiss now and then. Brian was never without a drink as promised.  

Cynthia and her date walked up to Justin and she slipped Aaron out of Justin’s arms.  The handsome man asked, “Do you mind if I take a picture of that portrait and show it to a friend of mine? He was looking for someone to do some paintings for him and I think he would like your style, not only of this one but I saw a few throughout the house.”

“Please do!  After the first of the year I hope to find some more to do.  My headaches are finally manageable and Aaron is growing so fast, I will be ready to do more by then.”  He wandered off and started taking pictures while Cynthia and Justin both watched Brian.

“He is drinking more than his share tonight.” She said as she handed Aaron back to his daddy.

“His mother is getting better and will hopefully be out of here in a week or so.”

“I am sure he is celebrating then. I just haven’t seen him drink like this since he lost you.  Well, right after that he had a few nights but since then ….”

“This mother thing has taken a lot out of him.  I think more than he realizes but if she is leaving I’ll get him back. He just needs to vent and tonight is the perfect way to do it.”  

Jenn stepped over and took Aaron. We will be leaving in a few minutes.  “I just need a little snuggle time with this boy…”

“Before snuggle time with that one?” Justin nodded toward her date who was talking to Tracy.  Tracy had dressed like a Barbie doll with super high heels and an overly exaggerated chest. She had a mini dress on and a long blond wig. She pulled off the look well.

“I hope so,”  Jenn winked at her son as she kissed her grandson. “Well, you better take this one back and I will find the little dinosaur before I go.  Are you going to be able to take care of Brian tonight?”

“He’ll probably just drink himself to sleep. And if I need help getting him upstairs, James and Emmett will be here to help.” Justin kissed his mom as she walked over to her date and then, before leaving, she said goodbye to Gus.

The crowd slowly thinned out and soon it was James and the old crew of Emmett, Michael and Ben, Ted and Blake as well as Justin, Brian and Tracy. Ronni had taken the boys and put them to bed. Brian, by now, was getting very unsteady.

“Hey, Brian, why don’t you let some of our friends help you upstairs.”

“I’m not ready to sleep.  Hey, Mikey, do you still get a hard on for me? Or has Ben finally fucked that out of you?”

“Brian, come on.” Justin tried to distract him. “Let’s get you to bed.  Em and James will say goodbye to our friends for us.”

“Can’t wait to get me in bed can you? Why do you even want me in bed? My mother obviously raised an asshole so...Oh, maybe that’s my attraction.”

“Michael, let’s get out of here.  Justin, it really was a great party.  Sorry it had to end this way.” Ben put his arm around Michael’s waist.

“Come on, Ben, it was good when we had…”

“Good night, everyone.” Michael said as Ben led him to the door.

“Come on, Brian, my big hunky boyfriend and I will help you up to bed.” Emmett, with the help of James, gave Brian no option but to go upstairs with them.

“Justin, are you alright?” Ted came over and put a hand on his shoulder.  

“I am.  I’m just….he hasn’t been like this since before…”

“We can stick around if you want us to,” Blake said coming to the other side of Justin.

“I’m not alone here.” As Justin said this, Tracy seemed to appear from nowhere.

“Really, guys, it is nice of you to offer but I can hang here with Justin as long as he needs someone and my bedroom is just steps away so you two go ahead to your own home.”

After a little more conversation, James and Emmett reappeared and the last four men walked out together leaving Tracy and Justin on the sofa by the fireplace. They each had a glass of wine.  As they sat there, Tracy slipped off the high heels and without batting an eye unbuttoned her shirt in front of Justin and popped out the falsies now looking like the slim young woman she was.  She pulled off the wig and ran her hands through her hair and then started to take off her false eyelashes. The first one came right off but the second one was caught on her natural lashes.

“Let me get that for you.” Justin moved closer and rested his hand on her cheek as he gently teased the false lash away from her real lash. As Justin placed the lashes in her hand she kissed him softly.”

“Um, Tracy, I….”

“Oh, I know, Justin.” She moved putting more space between them.  “I just meant to thank you for your help.  I would have probably ripped off half my lashes and I don’t have that many the way it is.” She smiled at him.

“I should say thank you for staying up with me. I better go upstairs.  Aaron will probably be ready for another bottle in about four hours and obviously Brian won’t be helping.”

“Justin, does he do this often?”

“When I met him this was the norm but tonight was because his mother is here.  This is not the man he is today but it is the boy his mother raised.  Thanks, Tracy, for sitting here with me.”

“Any time. Justin.  You are one of the sweetest people I have ever met.”

They stood and without thinking Justin hugged her.  Tracy eagerly hugged him back before they both went their own ways.

Justin made sure he had what he would need for Aaron’s bottle and moved upstairs. After dropping the bottle and formula in the nursery and kissing Aaron’s soft cheek, he moved to the master.  Brian was lying naked spread out on the bed but he could tell he wasn’t resting peacefully.  The blankets were all twisted at the bottom of the bed and Brian’s whole body seemed to be twitching and as Justin slipped into the bed next to him Brian started mumbling, “No, don’t want to.  No, I….” Justin couldn’t understand the rest of the words but his strong husband sounded like a scared boy again.  That woman had to go, and soon!

Chapter 5

Justin had gotten up and fed Aaron around 6:00 a.m. After feeding him and changing him, he laid the content baby back in his crib and went to check on Brian.  He had been up with him a couple times by 6:00.  He held him through a bad dream and stood next to him as he threw up, placing a cool cloth on the back of his neck and then helping him back into bed.  Once he was sure Brian was sleeping peacefully now as the sun was shining, Justin went downstairs with both boys.  Gus couldn’t stop talking about the party and how many people he scared because he was a big, bad dinosaur.

Ronni sent Justin off. “You need to relax, Justin,” she said as she handed him a cup of tea.  “Go up to your studio.  Sleep if you want.  Paint if you want.  Watch TV.  Just go take care of you because we both know that Brian will need you later.

“Thanks, Ronni.  I think I will do just that.” As he turned to head for the door he ran directly into Tracy.  “Oh, hey Tracy. Thanks again for last night,” he said in a polite tone.

“It was my pleasure.  Anytime you need to talk, I’m here.” Justin smiled and nodded as he walked past her.

Justin had barely closed the door when Ronni asked, “What did you do?”

“I didn’t do anything.  What do you mean?”

“I would be careful if I were you.” Ronni said softly, not wanting to draw Gus’ attention.

“Ronni, seriously I…”

“You cannot hide your feelings to me and I doubt you will keep it hidden for long from them. If you like your living situation you better get your feelings in check.”

“I have homework to do.  I will be able to make lunch and dinner.” With that Tracy turned and walked back to her room. 

Ronni looked at the door Justin had gone through.  She hoped he realized what was going on.  She had warned both of them.  There was nothing more she could do.

Justin pulled out a canvas but soon realized he wasn’t in the right mood.  He turned on the TV but then walked to the window and stared out to the pool area.  He glanced at his watch.  It was a bit after 8:00.  If Brian wasn’t awake by 10:00 he would go wake him.  Claire was supposed to be here around 1:00 and he knew Brian would need several cups of coffee and something to calm his stomach before he dealt with her.  He could see Joan walking in the pool house.  He hadn’t gone back there but he had seen her out with one of her caregivers a couple times for just a moment to get some fresh air and he could see she was making progress. All he could hope for was that they could offer Claire enough money for her to take over.  He would give her anything he had if she would take that off of Brian.

Eventually he moved back to the sofa, in front of the TV and very soon he was sound asleep. 

As his mind slowly woke he realized he was smelling coffee.  He first thought he was in bed but then remembered he was on the sofa in his workspace. He opened his eyes and saw Brian sitting in the chair next to the sofa. He held a mug in both hands and his eyes were closed, as if the light was too bright to deal with. 

“Good morning,” Justin sat up and realized Brian had brought him a cup of coffee, too. 

Brian’s eyes fluttered open, “Hey.” He stood and moved to sit next to Justin.  He set his cup down and turned to him.  He gently put his hand behind Justin’s head and pulled him close.   Justin could taste coffee and a hint of toothpaste.

“How’s your stomach? I can see how your head is.”

“I ate a piece of toast.  Wasn’t sure I would be able to even keep down the coffee without something to absorb the acid already churning in there. And the headache is getting better. Hell, how did I do this three or four nights a week.”

“You were younger and you didn’t have a business and a family.”

“I’m sorry.  I don’t know what I all said last night but I think I owe a few apologies, and you are the first.”

“Oh Brian, Michael and Ben are probably the only ones you should talk to.  What you said was very ‘Brian’ from the day but you probably did over step.”

“Did I say something about fucking him?”

“Yep.  You know Michael. He just let it go but,”

“Did you have to hold Ben back?”

“No, you know Ben is more level headed then that. He was sober.” Justin wrapped his arms around Brian and held him close. “Do you remember any of your dreams last night?”

“I don’t even remember that I did dream. Why, what did I say?”

“Never mind.  If you don’t remember, I would just be guessing.  What time is it?”

“It’s about 10:30.”

“I had planned to wake you up at 10:00.  Glad you got up on your own.”

“I had to piss too bad to sleep through it.”

“I’m glad you didn’t,” Justin said lightly, bringing a smile to Brian’s face. “Brian, are you going to try to talk to Claire before or after she sees your mom.”

“I think after.  I want her to see how well she is really doing. I will pay for any service she needs, that insurance won’t pay for.  I would give her anything to get her out of here.”

“I know, but you know we had to do what we have done.”

“I do know that.  And I hope I have convinced her that she doesn’t have control over me and she has met Gus. How can you meet him and not smile at that open, loving boy of ours?” Brian kissed Justin and this time pushed him to the side so soon he was laying on top of him. “Thank you.”

“For what?”

“For understanding.  I’ll call Ben and Michael. I owe them that.”

“Let’s go get you something to eat. You can’t meet with Claire on an empty stomach. Is there anything I should know about her?”

“I haven’t seen her in over a year.  She is a lot like my mom but instead of feeling like everything is owed to her, she feels like everyone has it out for her. She always tried to do what Mom asked just because she didn’t want to stand up to her. I think the same thing happened with her husband.  He just couldn’t stand her simpering after a while.  Her boys are almost unbearable but that is because she let them do anything not wanting to punish them in any way or for any reason. The problem is, she thinks that’s love.”

“You don’t have that problem anymore.”  Justin felt Brian’s hand slipping into his fly. “Oh, god, you have no problem showing love, and I am not talking about what you are…..” Justin had to compose himself for a second, “doing to me now.  I love all of you, both inside and out.” 

Justin unbuttoned Brian’s fly and soon they were both on the plush rug, holding the other’s cock in their mouth. Soon both men were reaping the reward. Justin flipped around and lay in Brian’s arms for a few minutes.  “As much as I would love to hide up here with you all day, I think I better go eat something beside you, not that I didn’t enjoy it.” Brian said and kissed Justin. “You know I couldn’t deal with this without you.”

Brian and Justin went down and had an early lunch.  Tracy was outside with Gus so they could talk freely.  “You know,” Brian said as he bit into some of the Primanti Brother sandwich left from yesterday. “It hit me how little I do know about my mother.  I think I am going to do a little research.  Her past does not give her a pass on her behavior but it might answer some lingering questions.  I am going to ask Claire if she knows anything more than I do. Well, I hope to ask her but I will have to see what her mood is.”

“Bri, do you want me to hang around or do you want time with her alone?”

“I need you there, Sunshine.  If I get….well, too rude, you will know how to smooth it over plus, I just want her to meet you.  I don’t know why that’s important to me but it is for some reason.”

“I would like to meet her, too, especially after we talked on the phone a couple times.  I’d like to come to an understanding with her.”

“Damn, I don’t deserve you.”

“Daddy, Daddy Justin, someone is coming! Who is visiting today? Are they just late for the party? Do they think the party is today?”

Brian captured his excited son and set him on his knee.  “Actually, Gus, this lady is visiting the lady in the pool house.  It is her daughter. Her name is Claire.”

“That makes sense.  I would visit you if I was grown up.” Gus smiled at Brian.

“Well, I am glad to hear that.  I would love it if you visited but now, it looks like you could use a little clean up and I bet someone will get you some lunch after your hands are clean.  I need to go show Claire where her mom is staying.” Brian hugged Gus and swung him in the air on the way to getting his feet on the floor.  As his feet touched down the doorbell rang.

“I’ve got him,” Tracy said and she led Gus down the hall to get him washed up.

“And I’ll answer the door,” Justin said as he got up and walked toward the front door. He pressed the intercom button and the wall and verified it was Claire before walking to the front door. “Claire, hope you didn’t have any trouble finding the place.”

“I had no idea it was this big.” She stepped in and looked around the entry.

“I’m Justin, by the way.  Your mom will be glad to see you.” 

“I doubt that.” As they took a few more steps into the house, Brian came into view. “Well, Brian, I wondered if you were home.  It’s nice to meet Justin, even if you never thought to introduce us…”

“Claire, don’t start.  You and I both know that we are never going to be that family.  Why don’t you go visit with Mom and when you are done there come back for a cup of coffee.  We will need to talk about the future.”

“You aren’t going to go out there with me?” Claire asked with a little nervousness in her voice.

“Claire, if you can’t hold your own with her now, you never will. She is starting to walk and talk. If you ever hope to act like an adult now is the time.” 

“But Brian,” Claire whined as Justin pushed her out the door.  She is staying over there in the pool house.  Just come back to this door when you are done talking to her. It will be unlocked.”

After Claire was gone, Brian walked back to Justin and pulled him close. “I never realized it but she is really nervous going to see her.  I guess if I am there with her I would be the one who was under attack but since she is there alone, she probably has to put up with some of that.”

“It is obvious your mother doesn’t go easy on anyone and I think she is learning she can’t make you her main target any more. But she will need to target someone.” Justin said intuitively.  

“Don’t feel too sorry for her.” Brian said as he kissed Justin’s neck.

“I have empathy for anyone who was raised in the chaos you grew up in.” Justin began to stroke Brian’s crotch.

“You aren’t going to do that to my sister are you?”

Justin shivered, “Seriously, you just made my flesh crawl. And you know that wasn’t an insult to your sister.  Sex with a woman one time was more than enough.”

“I never knew you had been with a woman,” both Justin and Brian jumped when they heard Tracy.

“Oh, I didn’t know you were there,” Brian commented  and then kissed Justin.  “And he wasn’t even drunk.  Every time I had hetero sex I was blitzed and then it was usually Lindz.”

“That’s Gus’ mom, right? Is that how Gus was born?” The look Brian gave her took her a second but then she said, “Sorry, that’s none of my business.”

“You’re right, it isn’t.” Justin said.

Brian tightened his arm around Justin, “No, Trace, she used a turkey baster.  We were just good friends in college and well…”

Brian usually didn’t give that much information about himself.  Justin felt a little self conscious with Tracy now. He was sure it was just because Ronni read something into it.  She had to know she didn’t have anything he wanted.

Tracy didn’t take the hint, “You’ve had sex with a girl? I know it’s none of my business but now I’m curious.”

“Just once.” Justin changed the subject, “I’ll make a pot of coffee.  Do you think Claire will stay a couple hours? More?”

“I think she will give her the obligatory hour and then rush back, hoping for more than coffee.”

“Tracy, do we have any cake or cookies?” Justin asked

Brian interrupted.  “Oh, I’m sure she would like something sweet but more importantly she will want booze.”

“Brian, she is going to be driving.”

“I didn’t say we should give it to her.  I just know she will want it. You have to admit, my mother could get anyone to drink.”

“Where is Gus, Tracy?” Brian asked.

“He’s napping.  He should be up in about half an hour or so.  I can….” 

“Go take the rest of the day off.  You have been working more hours then you need to.  We’ve got this.”

“But Ronni is off for the night and….”

“I think we can manage our boys.  I am sure you already have dinner ready to go in the oven so go somewhere and have fun.” Justin said.

“Well, I really don’t have anywhere to go but I will work on homework.  I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

Once she was out of the room Brian said, “Am I missing something? What is up with the two of you.”

Before Justin could answer the door opened. Justin glanced at the clock and it was one hour on the dot. “Why don’t the two of you go sit by the fireplace.  I will bring a tray as soon as the coffee is done.

Brian waved his arm toward the sitting area and he followed her over. She sat in the chair Brian pointed at, “She is really making progress.  She has been here a week and she is walking better and talking better.”

“Sorry that is coming back. If we could just keep her silent.”

“Brian, you are talking about our mother.”

“I’m not going to argue with you.  I am thinking she would be much happier with you than us.  It has always been obvious she would rather be with you than me.  I will gladly pay the staff she needs that the insurance won’t take care of. She is just more at home at…”

“Brian, she is not coming to my house.  I...well, I have a new friend and he isn’t going to ...well, he’s moved in and…”

“And you haven’t told our mother that you are living in sin,” Brian laughed softly as he said it. Justin walked over with a tray of coffee and some cookies and handed them each a cup of coffee.  “Fine, Claire, she can stay here…” 

Justin dropped his cup. “Oh shit,” Justin rushed back to the counter and brought a roll of paper towels with him, quickly cleaning up the spill.

“I’m sorry, Justin. I should have asked you first. Do you mind if Mom stays here for a little while longer?”

“Brian, can I talk to you a minute, in the kitchen? Excuse us, Claire.  We will be right back.” Justin grabbed Brian’s arm and pulled him over to the counter. “What the hell are you saying? I thought you couldn’t wait for her….you have been so tense.”

“Sunshine, do you trust me?”

“Of course I do.”

“Then, I’ll explain it later.” Brian kissed Justin and took his hand as they walked back to ‘Claire.

“Brian, you aren’t going to argue with me?” Claire was shocked.

“She can stay here but I do have a couple things to ask you.  What do you know about her family?”

“Mom’s family? She always said she didn’t have any but I vaguely remember meeting a sister of hers once when I was really little.  It might have been when you were born.”

“Do you have any idea what her maiden name was?”

“No, but I know it is in her Bible.”

“You promise me you will look for anything that might be at her house about her past and I will keep her here the next 4 weeks. December 1, and by then she should be good enough to go back to her place.”

“Ok, Brian why are you being so nice?”

“I’m really not as bad as you think I am, Claire.  Oh, and you do have to come visit weekly. I don’t want to hear her bitch about you not visiting because it would be my fault somehow. You have my email and my phone number so text or email any information you can find out about her.”

“Brian, she isn’t going to like this.”

“Claire, you have two options.  Either you help me with this or I promise you, she will be on your doorstep before the end of the week.”

Ten minutes later, Claire was gone and Gus came down the stairs looking for one of the adults in his life.  Justin knew he would just have to wait to figure out what Brian was thinking. It was about 10:00 p.m.  “Do you mind telling me what the hell you were thinking with Claire? You have been upset since she moved in and now you volunteered to have her stay another month?”

“Justin, I am doing this for Gus.  Well, for me but because of Gus.  He asked why she was so sad and I realized I had no idea.  Yes, it is possible that she just has a black soul but I can’t shake the feeling now that something had to have started all this. I mean, our dad was an ass but he was a man of the time but Joan, I just don’t know.”

“Ok, Brian, I can’t say I totally understand but I think I have an idea what you’re saying.”  Justin stripped and got in bed. “But Brian, if she hurts you, I will take her out on a back road and drop her.”

“I’m ready for this, Sunshine.  Just like I am ready to make love to you.” Brian’s mouth moved down one of Justin’s arms and nuzzled his inner elbow letting his lips move further down and took one of his fingers in his mouth.

“Oh, my love, one more thing before you take me over the moon!”  Brian started sliding down Justin's abs and stopped at his navel.  His tongue darted in and around it. As Brian followed the trail that led lower Justin just sighed, “Oh, hell, forget it!  Take me hard and fast.”  Brian helped him flip and Justin stuck his ass in the air and then Brian moved in just like he asked, hard and fast.

“Oh, god!” Brian adjusted Justin’s height and that changed the pressure on his prostate driving him nearly insane. The next noise he made was that of someone totally out of control of all reasonable thought and with that, Justin gave in. He thrust himself back and came off his elbows leaning against Brian as Brian wrapped his arms around Justin’s chest as he thrust a few more times before falling into the same bliss as Justin. He held Justin so close they truly did feel like one body, one soul when they were like this.

As their bodies began to cool, they separated and dropped onto the mattress, pulling the blankets over their damp bodies. Justin turned and faced Brian loving the feel of Brian’s body against him. His mouth sought Brian’s and his lips played with Brian’s but soon Justin seemed to be in another place.

“Sunshine, where did you go?”

“I was just thinking about your mother.”

“I hope you were picturing her in bed with us.”

“Oh, Brian, how am I supposed to get that image out of my head now.  I was just wondering what could have happened to her. What can I do to help?”

Brian kissed him, “You are so amazing.  I will let you know if I need help but right now, I’m ready to sleep.  You wore me out.”

Justin relaxed in his arm and softly said, “I love you.” and then he was breathing deeply.

“Sleep well, Sunshine.” and with that Brian fell into a restful sleep.

The next week went smoothly. Claire had emailed that their mother’s maiden name was  Sullivan. Brian came home every night and after playing with the boys and helping put them to bed, together, Brian and Justin would look for clues about his mother’s life.  At the end of the week Brian got a text from Claire.   After putting the boys down, Brian and Justin sat with sharing the laptop in their bedroom.

“You know I told you Claire texted today.”

“Oh, ya, what did she have to say? Is she coming over this weekend?”

“She’ll be here Sunday and she is bringing the heathens.”

“Lock up Gus.  He doesn’t need to meet his cousins. What else did she have to say?”

She thinks Joan might be mom’s middle name. She saw the name Catherine Joan Sullivan printed somewhere.  She didn’t tell me where.”

“Well, we’ve looked up Joan Sullivan and found nothing.  Let’s see if we can find Catherine Sulivan somewhere.”

It was nearly midnight when Brian took the computer off Justin’s lap and pulled him to his feet.  “You, my darling husband, are going to come to bed with me.”

“But I think I have a lead…”

“That will be there in the morning.  Right now, I just need to hold my husband until we fall asleep.”

“That’s all you need?”

“It is. That doesn’t mean I would be upset if you wanted more.”

“Let’s go to bed, stud.”

After making love, Brian spooned up against Justin.  “In the morning I’m going to go see my mother’s reaction to the name Catherine Sullivan.”

“Do you think that’s wise?”

“I don’t really care.  Monday they evaluate her improvement and she may be down to much less help. I am going to talk to Tracy and see if she minds sleeping in the pool house and help her with breakfast.  Then she will have help getting dinner before she is home alone for the evening.”

“Sounds like you have a plan.” Justin responded.

Brian had felt Justin tense when he mentioned Tracy. “What is going on between you and Tracy? Ever since the party I get the feeling you two had words or something.”

“Or something. Ronni thinks she has a crush on me and well, there was a moment after you had passed out at the party. She told me it was just a thank you for helping but I think it was a little more on her part.”

“Do I have to be worried?” Brian rubbed his cock against Justin’s ass. 

“What do you think?” Justin turned into Brian’s long, strong arms and kissed him. “Good night, Bri.”

“One more thing before you close those beautiful eyes.  Let’s take the boys out tomorrow.  There is a dinosaur exhibition at the children’s museum. I think Gus would love to see his ancestors.”

“That would be great.  I haven’t been in the city for a couple weeks.”

“We can leave late in the morning and that way they can take naps on the way in and I will be done irritating my mother by then.”

“I can’t think of a way I would rather spend my day.” Justin relaxed against him.

“Good night, Sunshine.”

In the morning Brian and Justin agreed not to tell Gus where they were going.  They just promised him the family was going out for lunch in the city and Gus could pick where they ate. Gus was very excited about the day out with the family. When Brian and Justin told Ronni about their plans she made a suggestion.

“I totally understand if you want both boys with you but it might be nice for Gus if he had both of you to himself. Plus, Aaron would love the day with his dads and brother but he may not like the change in his schedule.”

“But, Ronni, you don’t have to work. You are supposed to be done at noon today.”

“Well, I was just dumped by my date so I was hoping Aaron would take my mind off the gorgeous man I was supposed to be with.”

“Who is he? Is he crazy canceling your date?”

“Actually, he is a good man.  His mother, who I know, was in the hospital and just got home and he doesn’t want her to stay alone.”

“Are you sure, Ronni? I know Gus would enjoy it.  I had thought about asking Mom but…”

“Don’t you dare.  I may go to a movie after you come home but don’t rush for me.” 

“Thanks, Ronni.  I am sure Gus will like that.” Brian kissed her cheek.  “And I think now I’m going to check on my mother.”  He picked up a tray that had he had put together with a carafe of coffee and some treats.

“Brian, don’t push her too much. She is still recovering and...well, you want to get answers from her.”

“If she hasn’t told me in 33 years I doubt she will tell me anything now but I do hope I see that ‘look’ that tells me she recognizes that name.” Brian leaned down and kissed Justin and Aaron, who was in his chair next to Justin. “Come and get me if I’m gone more than an hour.” With that he walked out the door.

“What are you up to, Justin?” Ronni filled his coffee cup again.

“Brian really wants to figure out what caused his mother to be the way she is so we have been doing a little research. We think she uses her middle name so Brian is sure she will react if we are right.”

“Hiding something? That makes perfect sense.  But what could be so bad that it made her that bitter?”

“Well, my guess is a lot of it is just her nature but maybe something happened.  Brian doesn’t know her family at all so it seems to be a mystery he wants to investigate now.  I think he is planning on hiring someone who knows how to do this kind of research but he wants to know we are on the right track.”

“I think that is a very good idea. Do you mind watching the boys while I make a couple calls.”

“Of course not.” Justin picked up Aaron and they went to play with Gus in the play area.  After setting Aaron in a bouncy seat Justin and Gus began playing with cars. 

As they played, the back door opened.  Justin looked up, “Oh hey, Em, what’s up?”

“We are just coming to pick up some food Ronni made for us.  She made some spicy meals for James which is fine with me because that hot stuff gets his blood flowing in all the areas, and I know you know what I mean.”

“Hey, Em, do you mind staying with the boys just a second? I need to run up to the studio and I don’t want to leave them alone.”

“No problem. I thought you might take them up there on a day like today so you and Gus could get your paint on while Aaron practices just being the most adorable little guy there is.”

“I would but we need to work out the ventilation up there before I want them to spend time up there.”

“If it is dangerous, you shouldn’t spend time up there, either.” 

“I crack the windows when I am up there but won’t do that with the boys when it is so chilly outside. I’ll be right back.”

By the time Justin came back, James had joined Emmett and was making truck noises while Gus giggled. “Hey, Justin, I mentioned the ventilation system and he says he knows someone who could take care of that for you.”

“James, you already do so much for us.”

“Justin, I am not that busy now that I don’t have to mow. I can be an extra set of hands and it shouldn’t take us long.”

“That would be greatl.  I’ll let Brian know you will be charging materials and just let us know when you need a check to pay whoever you hire. Do I know the person?”

“Remember the guy that drove you and Brian home, the old friend of mine?”

“What’s his name, Leo?” Justin asked as he picked up Aaron as he started to fuss.

“Len.”

“James, you aren’t thinking about bringing that man…” Em bristled.

“Emmett, I know he can do this and it will only be a couple days of work.”

“Well, I will be right there with you two.  I’m not letting the two of you alone.”

“Emmett Honeycutt,” James' accent was heavy as he took Emmett in his arms, “You are the only man I want.  You are the only many for me.”   They kissed and by the time James loosened his grip Emmett spoke.

“If you don’t need me, I think we have something to finish back at our place, in the kitchen, and the living room, and the bedroom…” Em kissed James again and the two men made their way to the door.

Brian held his tray of coffee and scones in one hand as he knocked on the door and entered. He had been told his mother would be alone a couple hours so he wasn’t surprised to find his mother alone.  What did surprise him was seeing how she was still struggling to  walk between the kitchen and the chair. He had thought she was faking but now he realized she wasn’t.

“Brian.” She managed to get his name out but it was slurred.

“I brought some fresh coffee and scones.”

She didn’t say anything but she sat down and moved her small table up to her. Brian set a cup of coffee on it for her and then the pastry that would melt even in her mouth.  They sat in silence as they both sipped on the dark, steaming liquid. Brian waited for a thank you but then chuckled out loud as he saw the look of bliss on his mother’s face for a split second when she tasted the scone for the first time.

“My struggle is funny?” Joan managed to spit out.

“It wasn’t that at all.  Do you really think I am that focused on your every move? What does make you so edgy?  I used to think it was because you didn’t know if Jack would come home drunk.  Then I thought it was because you were drunk. Now I wonder if it is the shadow of Catherine Sullivan that makes you so nasty.”

Joan started coughing, choking on a bite she had just taken. He handed her a glass of water and she took a swallow of it.  “Don’t know her.”

“Come on, as a kid in the Irish section of town and you don’t know a Catherine Sullivan?”

To make it easier she picked up her tablet and wrote, ‘Well, as a girl maybe.  Not now.’

“Why don’t I believe you? Maybe because of your reaction to the name.” He sat silently for a few moments.  He thought he would let it sink in and see if she responded to anything else.  

‘Maybe a distant relative’ she wrote.

“Ok, you can play it that way.  My family is going into town today. Do you need anything from your house? We can pick it up.”

“Leaving?” she questioned with a bit of fear in her eyes.

“We aren’t leaving until your help for the day arrives.” He saw her relax. “And there is always someone on the property.”

“Fags,” she said through pursed lips.

“Ha, is that supposed to make me upset? Justin and I may not have a perfect relationship but at least we know what love is about and we are both here to make a life for our boys.”  Her face didn’t change. “So is there anything we can pick up at your house or at a store for you?”

“Ronni shopped.” He could see Joan was getting tired.  She picked up her tablet once more. ‘Address book by phone. Want to call friends when I can speak better.’  She paused a second, ‘Would like Father Tom to visit.

“Back in the day, I would have liked a visit from him, too.” Brian chuckled.

“What?”

“Never mind, I have to go.  We have an outing planned and I can see your nurse walking up. Have a good day, Catherine.”

Before she could say anything, he was out the door but he was sure he had the name right.  Why would she have changed her name? He would find out. And if his mother wanted to see Father Tom so badly, maybe they would invite him over.  A night in the hot tub in full view of his mother...he would have to see if Father Butterfield had a boyfriend right now.  He almost felt sorry for the man. How did you live a lie like that for so many years?

By 11:00 Brian, Justin, and Gus were on their way to Pittsburgh.  Gus picked a fast food spot and after eating played for a few minutes in the play area. And then  when Gus didn’t want to stop playing they told him where they were going and then they could barely keep up with him. 

They spent more than two hours looking around and by the time they got to the car, Gus was asleep in Brian’s arms.  Brian put him in his carseat and kissed his cheek as he snapped everything in place. He then turned around and pulled Justin close. “I can’t remember having one day like this with my parents. He is going to have good memories of growing up, isn’t he?”

“He is going to have amazing memories and I think I took enough pictures today to get a book made of it so he can keep the memory close.”

“Damn I love you,” Brian pulled him close for one more kiss.  “Now we have to go by the house and pick up a couple things for Catherine.”

“Brian, don’t call her that.  There has to be a reason she doesn’t use it.”

“And we are going to find out why.” A few minutes later he pulled up in front of his childhood home. 

Justin got out but stayed by the car to keep an eye on Gus.

“Brian Kinney, is that you?”  An older woman walked up with a little dog on a leash.

“Yes, Mrs. Connor.”

“How is your mother doing? You know we aren’t close but I don’t want her to be ill.”

“She is getting better.  She should be home around the holidays.”

“And where are your manners? Who is this adorable young man?” Justin blushed and smiled at the friendly lady.

“This is my husband, Justin.” He watched for her reaction.

“Was that supposed to surprise me? I saw you sneaking around when you were a boy. I knew but it was none of my business.” With that she saw Gus sleeping in the back.  “Oh, what a beautiful boy.”

“Mrs. Connor, could I ask you a big favor? Would you mind letting your pup just roam right here by our car and keep an eye on our boy while we spend ten minutes in the house?”

“You go ahead.  He is obviously tuckered out and my Joey doesn’t care where he walks.

Brian and Justin went into the house and immediately grabbed the notebook his mother kept her numbers in and Justin walked over to a bookshelf with photo albums.  “Bri, who is in these books? They are too old to have you in them.”

“I have no…..oh, ya, grab those. They might have some answers for us.”

“I hope so. Well, let’s go.  I trust Gus with Mrs. Connor but I don’t want her to get cold.”

“Why do I get the idea you like that old woman?”

“She has lived there since I was little and more than once when my mom was in a mood, she would invite me in.” As they walked out he glanced at the kind woman and her house. It was really showing its age.  “I think I will send over a handy man and help her get the place back in shape.”

“You are a good man, Brian Kinney.” Justin kissed him as they walked up to the vehicle.

“I can see real love between you two.  Bless you.”

“Thank you! Mrs. Connor, did you know my mom when she was young, like before you moved in next door.”

“Well, it may be a city but this is a small village here.  You know everyone knew everyone.”

“Do you know anything about my mom’s family? I am trying to plan a surprise for her. Did she have any siblings?”

“If I remember right she had two or three brothers but they left home young. I don’t think they ever came back.”

“Was her maiden name Sullivan?”

“Well, yes.  She didn’t ever tell you that?”

“No, she never mentioned her family.”

“Then you don’t know about your aunt?

“She had a sister, too?”

“Well, yes.  Anna Claire was your mother’s twin sister. Everyone always said that she got all the sweetness and light and your mother ….. Well, I don’t want to speak bad of your mother.”

“Mrs, Connor, do you know where my aunt is now?”

“I can’t believe….. Last I heard she was in a nut house.  I know that isn’t the appropriate thing to call it.  Your aunt had a breakdown and some people think your mother may have been partly responsible.  Now, I just talked bad about her again.  I don’t like doing that.  You take that little one home and give him lots of love and snuggles.  I am sure you never got your share.”

“Mrs. Connor, I always knew you were there when I was little.  And we have another one at home that I am really starting to miss all of the sudden.” Brian kissed the weathered cheek. “You don’t know how much you have helped me this afternoon.”

As Brian pulled out, Justin took his hand, “You ok?”

“Ya, I’m still absorbing. I have an aunt who has a story.  Maybe she can give me some answers.”

Chapter 6

Gus excitedly told Ronni about all the dinosaurs but as the sun started going down, so did Gus’ mood.  He had missed his normal nap and was just worn out so the little family had tomato soup and grilled cheese sandwiches for dinner and by 8:00 p.m. Brian and Justin sat on the sofa, each with a glass of bourbon and a photo album on their laps, looking at pictures.

“You have never seen these before?” Justin asked as they looked at the weathered pages.

“No, and I know I wasn’t into family but I don’t think they were there. I am hoping Claire can tell me something about these.”

Justin carefully took a picture out of it’s spot and looked at the back.  Do you have any idea who these people are?”

“None but since there are two girls that look the same age, I would bet they are my grandparents with Catherine Joan and Anna Claire.”

“Do you refuse to call her Mom when you talk to her, too?”

“She is not a mom.  A mom is someone who is there for her kids.  Like Jenn is with you and Molly, you always knew she loved you.”

“You’re right, even when I wasn’t so loveable.” 

“You’re always loveable,” Brian smirked at the goofy comment but leaned over and kissed Justin.  

“Are you going to go talk to her before Claire gets here tomorrow?”

“No, I don’t think so.  Maybe tomorrow evening you and I could have dinner with her or at least coffee.”

“No, Brian.  That is just going to irritate her.  What good is that going to do?”

“You’re right.  Do you think we will be able to find information about Anna Claire tomorrow?”

“Brian, maybe we should hire someone to just do this.  I don’t want you to stress out over this.”

“I’ll think about it but right now let’s keep looking at pictures.” 

An hour later they had both drunk a couple more glasses of bourbon and by now Brian was holding one picture. It was of his mother and aunt on some old man’s lap.  They looked to be about a year old.  They were dressed similarly. The photo was black and white but it looked like they wore the same dress in different colors.  Although the little girls looked similar, it was obvious to Brian which one was his mother. “This has to be Catherine.  Mrs. Connor said that Anna was always cheerful and we both know that my mother has maybe smiled twice in her life and I bet both times it was while she talked to Father Tom.  What would you say to having a threesome? It’s been a while and I would love to show her how special…”

“Brian, you know you aren’t going to do that.”

“No, I wouldn’t but she does want to see him,”

“I can understand that.  Church is important to her and if what we heard today really is something hanging over her head, it makes sense why her faith is important.  She may feel like she still needs to make atonement for something.”  Justin took Brian’s glass and set it next to his on the nearby table. “I am thinking I might have had a little more to drink than I thought and now I am horny as hell.” He moved so he straddled Brian’s lap. He started moving in a way that kept brushing his crotch against Brian’s and soon it was obvious he was having an effect.  He started kissing Brian as he slid his chest against Brian’s.

“Oh, god, take me now!” Brian groaned as he undid Justin’s fly.

“Do you mean that? You want me to screw you?”

“No, my love, I want you to make love to me with all the passion I know you have.”

“It’s been a long time.”

“It has been.  I’ve always said that to be a good top you have to bottom once in a while.”

“Ronni said she wasn’t coming home, right?” Justin commented as he pulled off Brian’s shirt.  He ran his face close to his body. “God, I love the smell of you.”

“I probably smell after the museum and …”

“You smell like Brian. Not like soap or cologne.  You smell of, well, you.”

It wasn’t long before they lost their clothes and Justin slowly entered Brian, taking his time to make it as comfortable as he could for him. As he did so he ran his hands down Brian’s sides and eventually rested on his hips.

“God, Sunshine, that feels amazing.” Justin stopped moving, “No, don’t stop now.”

“Shhh, I thought I heard something.” They both listened and could tell there was no noise coming over the baby monitor which picked up Aaron but also Gus if he called for them. “No, must have been a squirrel or something.” He started to move again and soon neither of them were hearing anything but each other.

At the end of the hall Tracy risked peaking out again. He really was gorgeous.  She watched every muscle in Justin’s body flex at his body glowed from the sweat that covered his body. She missed sex.  She could only imagine what sex with Justin would be like, or did she have a chance. She silently snuck back into her room and once she knew they hadn’t heard her she took a deep breath.  Maybe someday…. She undressed and turned her shower on.  She got in under the powerful stream of water and stood there with her face tilted  toward the spray, with her eyes closed and let her mind take her to bed with Justin.

Later on in their bedroom, Justin laid in Brian’s arms after they had made love again, this time Brian had been back on topping. “What time is Claire coming tomorrow?” Justin asked as he held onto Brian’s arms that were wrapped around his chest.

“She is coming right after lunch. I think only one of her boys is coming.  I don’t think John dares confront either of us.  I told her Peter could watch TV here after saying hi to his grandmother.”

“All I can say is he better not do anything to upset Gus or I’ll…”

“He’ll be fine.  Claire assured me. Is Molly still coming tomorrow?”

“Yes, she and Mom will be here around 10:00.  I think Ronni will have some brunch for all of us and then Mom is leaving before noon.  I think she has a hot date and without Molly home tonight I have a feeling...no I can’t go there.”

Brian kissed Justin below his ear, “The boys will love having Molly around.”

“We better get to sleep.  One or both of the boys will wake us up early.”

“Love you, baby.”

“Love you, Sunshine.”

It was a lovely November day.  It was sunny and calm. After a short discussion Brian decided he wanted to talk to his sister before his mother. He would go see her after Claire and Peter had left.  At least this morning would be pleasant.

Emmett and James showed up for brunch just before Jenn and Molly arrived.  Emmett appeared a bit upset and walked over to help Ronna and Tracy with the food. James walked over to Justin. “Does it work for us to work in your studio this week?”

“Oh, ya, I’m sure I can make that work.”

“Len will be here tomorrow and we will look at what we need.”

“I thought Len had said he was into landscaping.”

“He is but for a couple summers he worked for his uncle who was a plumber, well heating and plumbing and Len actually got licensed and for the heck of it he kept it up, thinking it would help if he ever did go into landscaping for running sprinkler systems.”

“Great.  I can’t wait.  Just let me know when you are actually going to start the work.”

“Emmett, what has gotten you all riled up this morning.” Ronni looked at Em, putting a hand on his hip.

“I don’t like the idea of Len coming to work with Jamesy.”

“Oh, Em, my son is as loyal as any man I have ever known.”

“Well, I know that but Len is slippery.  I don’t know why but I just don’t trust him for some reason.”

“It is only a couple days and I promise, I will keep an eye on my boy.”

“Thanks, Ronni.” Emmett hugged her just as the front door opened and Molly and Jenn came and added to the energy of the house.  

By 11:30, Jenn was driving away and Ronni and Tracy were cleaning up the kitchen.  “Ronni, you have taught me some amazing recipes.  Sometimes I think I learn more from you than I do from school.”

“School is always a good thing but learning from a friend is, too.” She realized Tracy wasn’t listening.  She could only see Justin, sitting on the sofa with his sister and sons. “Girl, you need to get those thoughts out of your mind.  That beautiful young man only has eyes for his gorgeous husband. 

Tracy grabbed Ronni’s arm and pulled her into the laundry room.  “I can’t stop thinking about him,” she whispered.  “I didn’t mean to do it but last night they were making love down here and I saw him naked and he is even more perfect…”

“You WHAT!” Tracy clamped her hand over Veronica’s mouth.

“I didn’t mean to, really and I didn’t stand and stare, but once I saw them…”

“Tracy, you need to take control of yourself.  This isn’t good for anyone, including Justin.”

“I don’t see why it hurts for me to…”

“You need to go find a nice, young man who is also interested in you.”

“But where do I find someone that is as sweet as he is and has a body that has everything a girl needs and I do mean everything?”

“Just remember when you are looking for a new job and place to live that I warned you.  I do not want to hear anything more about this.” And with that Veronica walked back into the kitchen. 

Justin had told Molly about Joan and that Brian’s sister and nephew would be here for a while this afternoon.  He also let her know that Gus did not know that he was related to the woman or the other people coming.

“That’s a little sad but I promise, I won’t say anything to him and I will keep him busy while they are around.”

“Thanks, Molly. I know you’re not a kid anymore.” Justin hugged his sister just as the doorbell rang.  “That will be Claire and Peter.”

“Aunt Molly, play with me please.” 

“Sure, Gus!  Let’s go to your room and you can choose what you want to play with.”

Justin smiled as he watched his sister and his son go upstairs before he answered the door. As he greeted Claire and Peter Brian appeared from the formal living room.

“Hi Claire.  Come in.”

“Claire, come in here.  I want to talk before you go out to see her.”

“Mom, do I really have to go see Grandma?”

“Well, pleasant as always I can see, Peter.” Brian looked at his nephew. “This is my husband, Justin.  If you treat him appropriately, he will show you where the TV is in the family room off the kitchen and you can find something to watch while I talk to your mom.”

Peter shot Brian a glare but he backed down quickly when he realized his uncle was not a pushover like his mother. 

“Come on, Peter.  Follow me.”

Once they got to the area off the kitchen, Peter looked at Justin.  “I didn’t think two men could get married.”

“Well, it will be legal very soon in the U.S. but we got married in Canada.”

“Does Uncle Brian really have a job that can pay for all this and is it legal?”

“Well, you are as charming as your grandmother, aren’t you?

“What do you mean? I’m not like that old bi…” Peter stopped when he saw the look on Justin’s face.  “How am I like her?”

“Well, your attitude stinks like hers does.  In our house we try to look at the good, not the bad.  We don’t want our boys to have that mind frame.”

“Kids? Mom said Uncle Brian had one boy.  Well, we have two boys. Gus and Aaron are brothers in every way that counts.” As if on cue, Aaron made his presence known and Justin picked him up.  

“Gus is almost five and Aaron is six months.” Justin saw a glint of a smile when Peter looked at Aaron. “You really need to say hi to your grandma but then you are welcome to come back here and find something to watch.”  Justin pointed to Tracy who was making something in the kitchen. “If you are hungry or thirsty you talk politely to Tracy, and she will get you something.”

“You aren’t going to be here?”

“I might be but this is a large house so sometimes it isn’t easy to find us but Tracy will be right there.” Justin started draping his arm around Peter’s shoulders but he felt him tense so he took a step away.  “I was just going to say that she is in culinary school so her samples are always amazing.”

“I don’t know about always but…”

“Are you guys always this happy? I am getting on overload.”

“It’s a good thing to be, isn’t it?”

Brian sat down and pointed at the spot next to him.  “Claire, have you ever seen these books?”

“These old photo albums? I remember seeing them in Mom’s closet once. They were high up on a shelf.  I wasn’t looking for them.  I was looking for a doll she had taken away from me because I had done something.”

“But she never showed them to you, did she?”

“No.  I think I remember them on the shelf the last couple years but I never looked at them. They are just a bunch of old people we never met.”

“You know that aunt you thought you remembered? Her name is Anna Claire and she is still alive.”

“What? If her sister is alive, why haven’t we met her?”

“I don’t know the details, yet, but I have a place to start now.”

“Well, I better go back there or she will yell at me for being late, not that I had a set time.” Claire stood and walked to the kitchen. She was so surprised to see Peter smiling as he made faces at Justin’s baby.  She couldn’t remember his name.

“Peter, time go to see your grandmother.”  Peter walked over to her as Brian followed her in.

“Claire, don’t tell her what we just talked about. I need to find out a few things before I talk to her about it.”

“You aren’t telling me something,” Claire whined. “What are you hiding?”

“I haven’t answered to you or her in years.  I’m not going to start now.”  Peter smirked as his mother got slammed by her brother.

“Isn’t Grandma in this house?”

“No, she is in her own house.” Claire snapped as she walked out the door, expecting Peter to follow. He shrugged and waved at Aaron as he walked behind her.

“Ok, what did you do to him in the ten minutes you were here with him?”

“I showed him respect and told him I expected it in return.”

“Damn, that’s why you are such good dad material.” Tracy watched Brian pull Justin into his arms and run his hand over that perfect ass. “Kiss me.” Brian said as his mouth came down on Justin’s. “That never gets old.”

“Tracy, come help me!” Ronni ordered from the laundry room.

“Sorry, Ronni, I need to check on my cake in the oven.” She wasn’t going to cow to the older woman.  She worked for Justin and Brian, not Ronni.  Brian and Justin were oblivious to the tension between the women.

“Peter, come give me a kiss.” There was no sweetness in her tone but Peter sluffed over and kissed her upturned cheek.

“So, you brought him to see the house of sin over there?”

“Mom, come on.  Brian and Justin are letting you stay here and making sure you have everything you need.”

“What I need is to be in my own home with my daughter taking care of me.”

“Mom, I am working long hours right now.”

“Not to mention the guy she is seeing,” Peter said as his mother shot daggers with her eyes.

“Man? You are bringing a man into your house?”

“Mother, I am a grown woman in my 30’s. I think I can…” with that Peter slipped out of the house. 

It was so nice he sat down on a bench that was out in the pool area.  He figured in the summer all these chairs had cushions.  He was just imagining what it was like living in this place when he heard some giggles coming from around the corner.  He got up and  moved so he could see around the corner but  he didn’t think whoever was there could see him. First he saw a couple guys.  They were walking hand in hand and the tall thin guy put his head on the other guy’s shoulder.  He smiled thinking his grandma had to hate living here with all this ‘sin’.  Then he heard more laughing. He moved right against the building and peeked around the corner.  

“Push me, Aunt Molly.  Higher, higher!”

“Gus, that is high enough.” She caught the swing and kissed the little boy.  As she let him go she was sure she saw someone just barely visible at the corner.  “You know it isn’t polite to spy on people.” Molly called over to a boy that had to be Brian’s nephew.  

Peter came out from behind the bush he was behind. “Who are you?” he asked awkwardly.

“I’m Molly.  I’m Justin’s sister. You must be Peter.”

“Ya,” was all Peter could say.  He liked the look of this girl.  Her strawberry blond hair and freckles were cute and he liked how she was so sure of herself but she wasn’t rude or anything. “I…..I was going to go watch TV in the big house.  You don’t live here, do you?”

“No, I am just visiting.  I love playing with my nephews.”

“Molly, push me. Who is that?”

“Oh, he is visiting the lady in the house. I will push you once more and then we need to go in.  Your daddy said you needed a nap.”

“I don’t want to nap,” he pouted a little bit.

“I promise to read to you when you wake up.”

“You will still be here?”

“I will even be here in the morning.” 

“Yeah!” Gus cheered as Molly gave him one more big push.

When she was struggling to get Gus’ foot out of the child swing, Peter walked over and helped get him free. When Molly set him down Gus took her hand and then reached for Peter’s.  He looked up at the ‘big kid’ and said, “Thank you.”

“Sure,” Peter stumbled over the word.  Were these people always this nice?

When the three walked into the house, Brian was surprised to see them together.  “It looks like you three introduced yourselves.”

“Daddy, Pete helped get me out of  my swing.” Gus reached up and Brian picked up his boy and instinctively hugged and kissed him. “Molly said she would read to me after I take a nap.”

“Well, that sounds like a great plan. Let’s get you some water and then head up to bed.”

“Where’s Daddy Justin and my broder?”

“They are in the nursery because it is time for Aaron’s nap, too.” Brian continued to talk to Gus as they moved up the stairs.  

“Are these people for real?” Peter dropped on the sofa and turned on the TV.

“What do you mean?”

“I mean they all talk so nice to each other.  I know Uncle Brian can yell.  I have heard it.”

“The only time I have heard him yell was when he was talking about our dad.”

“Why was he mad at your dad?”

“You don’t know what happened?” Peter shook his head. “After my brother got hurt my dad took him and let us think he was dead.” Peter’s mouth fell open.  “If it wasn’t for Brian, we may have never gotten him back.”

“Your dad took him away?”

“Ya, he’s in prison now because of it.  He broke a lot of rules and held my brother captive for almost two years.”

“Holy shit!  That is wild!” Peter looked at her face.  “Not in a good way but you really have had some crap in your life.”

“Yep, but now Justin is better and he is so happy and Aaron, he is such a sweet little baby.”

“Where did he come from? I know Gus is Uncle Brian’s through a lab.”

“That sounds so cold.  Brian loves him so much and so does Justin. And Aaron, well, he is the baby of one of Justin’s therapists.”

“He was with a girl?”

“No, he isn’t the biological father but they love Aaron so much.”

“All this love stuff is almost more than I can deal with.  I am just used to…”

“Peter, it’s time to go.  NOW!” Claire came storming in at that exact moment.  “You had to open your big mouth.  Now, she is never going to….” Claire’s voice trailed off as she walked through on her way to the front door.

“I hope I run into you again.  We are sort of, kind of related.”

“Ya, I’d like that.” Molly reached over and squeezed his hand a bit before he turned and walked out of the room.

Neither Peter or Molly noticed Tracy was in the kitchen. She walked over to Molly.  He’s cute isn’t he?”

“Oh, is he?” Molly played coy. Tracy bumped her elbow against Molly’s.  “Ya, I guess he is and he was just surprised people were nice to him but then if that’s his mom, no wonder he isn’t used to kindness.”

“How did Brian turn out as good as he did?”

“Well, I think as soon as he could he spent very little time at home. That’s what my mom said.”

“I always wondered.  Has your brother ever had a girlfriend?”

“The only girlfriend he ever had was his friend who’s a girl.  Daphne was his best friend all through school and she was so broken-hearted when Justin was gone.  They are still good friends but she doesn’t live around here now.”

“I bet he had girls that wanted to be more than a friend.”

“Maybe but I don’t think he ever wanted to be with a girl. He always looked at boys like that.  And I can understand why.  Boys can be SO cute.”  Molly raised her eyebrows at Tracy and they both laughed.

“Just remember, some of them aren’t so nice.  My ex is one of those and I’m not saying your dad is all bad because he has awesome kids but ….well, all people can have a bad streak.”

“I am not ready for a serious relationship,” Molly said so much like an adult, Tracy had to laugh.

“You better not be in a serious relationship.  Who are you two talking about?” Justin said as he and Brian walked in.

“No one,” Molly said quickly.  She looked at Tracy and Tracy winked.  Having Molly as a friend might be her way to find out more about Justin so she wouldn’t out her crush on Peter.

Brian looked around for Peter.  “I take it my sister and brat have left?”

“Ya, she stormed through here and Peter followed.”

“Guess I will give my mom a few minutes and then go talk to her myself.  Sunshine, why don’t you come with me.  You will be a good control for me.  You will know if I start to go too far. And Molly is here if the boys wake up.”

“Ok, Mol, text me if you need me.” Justin was glad Brian realized he wasn’t thinking that clearly right now.

“I know I’m not on childcare duty today but I am around so if they wake up I will be here to help if Molly has both of them up.” Tracy volunteered.

“Well, Sunshine, let’s go make a plan before we go talk to Catherine.”

“Catherine?” Tracy questioned.

“We’ll fill everyone in once we know what there is to know.” Brian said as he led Justin to the photos.  “I think we should take one of these pictures with us.  With the names on the back it will be hard for her to deny.”

“Brian, I understand why you want to push this.  I would, too, but I don’t think pushing her too hard is going to help.  If you are too stressed, just leave and I will see if I can find any more out without you there.”

“You’re right, that might work the best.  I know I will get worked up. Just seeing that woman gets me worked up. All the hate she has and all the secrets,  I’ll try not to push too hard because once we find Anna Claire I will have more questions I need answered.”

“Well, she has assistance right now so I think it would be best if we wait until she is alone. Let’s go to the office and look at the computer. I want to see if we have any messages from the researcher.”

Brian sat down at the desk and pulled Justin onto his lap. There was a message saying the researcher has an appointment at the institute next week. I have notified the institute and let them know as a relative I was sending someone over for my aunt’s records. Well, probably not records but to get information.” Brian was getting distracted with Justin’s ass pressed against his cock. He brought his mouth to Justin’s ear and his tongue flicked in and out of it.

Justin shivered, “You can’t do that and then just stop.” He turned looping a leg over each of the arms of the chair and resting his back on the desk behind him he unzipped Brian’s fly. At the same time, Brian did the same and before Justin could do anything else, Brian had him lift his hips and he slipped Justin’s pants down and then guided him downward. As he moved down he leaned forward and they locked eyes. It was like their minds linked and their movements synced.  As they began to move more quickly Justin moved closer and their lips came together. Now it was his turn to put his lips to Brian’s ear, “I love you, Brian Kinney.”

“Damn, what did I do when I thought you were gone?” With that he let go of Justin’s hips causing him to slide all the way down and wrapped his arms around Justin and pulled him against him as they both climaxed and then every muscle in their bodies turned to jelly.Neither of them felt like moving for several seconds.  Finally, Justin sat up and then moved his legs off the arms of the chair so he could move.

“Was that insane or was it just me?” Justin’s legs were like jelly as he stood next to Brian.

“That was definitely amazing!” Brian cleaned himself up and tucked himself back in, zipping his pants. “Well, before the boys wake up, we should go talk to Joan.”

“I am guessing you won’t be there long.  Maybe you should make a show of it and storm out.  I’ll hang out and see what she will tell me.” 

“Sounds like a plan, Sunshine, but you may be putting too much confidence in her.  Do you really think she cares enough to care if I am upset? I really don’t.”

Justin put his arms around Brian’s neck and kissed him.  “It is her loss.  Why don’t you call Father Tom and see if he will come out.  Tell him she has a secret and maybe she will confess to him.  If she confesses to him, maybe she will be willing to talk to us, too.”

“That sounds right.  You are my common sense.  Let’s go do this.”

When Brian and Justin walked into the poolhouse, Joan pulled a face and wrote, “You finally come together and it is just after you committed sodemy?” 

“No, woman, we made love.  Yes, I love my husband.  Could you ever say that Catherine!”

“Quit calling me that.  That isn’t my name.  That hasn’t been my name for a very long time.”

Brian glanced at Justin and nodded almost noticeably. “So you are admitting that is your name.  That’s good because I found this picture of you and Anna Claire.”

“Bri, take it easy.  I am sure your mom has reasons for hiding this.”

“Justin, your mother would never hide a family secret would she?”

“Brian, that’s not fair when we don’t know what her reasons are?”

“Brian, a lot of people change their names.” Joan stated, seeming to be trying to convince herself at the same time. 

“Does your Father Tom know you have a different name? Is it illegal to take communion with a different name?”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Joan said but Brian could tell she wasn’t so sure herself.  “Did you ever call Father Tom for me?” She wrote on her tablet.

“I will make sure that gets done,” Justin said sweetly.

“Justin, you aren’t falling for her shit, are you?”

Justin walked over and touched his cheek. His back was to Joan so she couldn’t see him wink. “I just think we need to give her some sympathy.   I mean she had a stroke and…”

“Don’t even go there.  After all she has done to make my life miserable! She and Jack were not fit to be parents but she doesn’t care what we think.  She never has. She probably hasn’t even gone to visit her sister since she was put in there.”

“Lie!” Joan said loudly. “Seen her.”

“I don’t even…..I am out of here. Obviously, she isn’t going to tell us anything anyway.” Brian turned and slammed the door as he left.

Justin signed and slumped in a chair. 

“Drama queen.” Joan said after the door shut.

“You have kept some important things from him.”

“Not his business,” she said.

“But it’s about his family.  I’m surprised his father didn’t tell him about your sister one night when they went out drinking.” Joan scribbled something down but then ripped the page out and threw it away. Justin smiled at her and said, “I’m sure you have your reasons.”

Justin sat there and talked with her a few more minutes.  He asked if there was anything she needed and he did a couple small things around the house for her. Before he left he brought her a bottle of water  and as he set it down with one hand he grabbed the paper out of the garbage without her noticing.

“Well, I will go remind Brian to call your priest and Tracy will bring your dinner out later.” Justin stopped at the door and turned to look at Brian’s mother. “Joan, I honestly don’t know if you truly care about Brian or not, and if you don’t it won’t phase you but all of this really does hurt him.  He covers it up with his bruskness and I don’t think you ever realized how tenderhearted he really is.”

When Justin got out of sight of Joan he pulled out the paper and read what Joan had thrown away.  He had to think about what exactly they had talked about.  He had said something about Brian’s father and why Jack hadn’t told Brian about Anna Claire.  He looked at the page and read it through twice. It was only three words but they were going to hit Brian like Jack’s fists had.

When Justin returned to the house Brian was playing with the boys.  “Hey, Sunshine, how’d it go?”

“We can talk later,” Justin glanced at Molly and Gus and Brian nodded. The rest of the evening they spent with the family.  They ordered pizza and Tracy brought dinner to Joan. She would spend the evening with her.  Once the boys had been put to bed, Molly went to her room to chat with friends. 

Justin poured each of them a drink while Brian put another log on the fire. Instead of sitting on the sofa, Brian stretched out on the rug with his back to it.

Justin handed Brian his drink and sat down next to him. “You’re killing me, here.  What happened after I left?”

“Not even a kiss first?” Justin turned toward Brian and Brian kissed him.  It was a long, lingering kiss that had both of them wanting more.  The kiss did what Justin had hoped, Brian relaxed just from the physical contact. Justin dropped his head on Brian’s shoulder and looked at the flames flicker. He took a sip of the liquid but sat silent for some time.

“Sunshine, what did she say? If she was rude, I have heard it all before. She isn’t starting to get to you, is she? You aren’t falling for her shit?”

“She called you a drama queen.  She can’t see it in herself.  I told her she wasn’t being fair to you.  I told her you deserved to know about your family.” He took another sip of the drink.

“You were out there for quite a while.  What blather did she spill or did she just sit there feigning helplessness.”  Justin didn’t respond.  “Justin, spill.  What did she say?”

“I told her she hadn’t been fair to you.  I told her you were family and as family you deserved to know about your family’s history.”

“And?”

Justin’s hand rested on Brian’s thigh. “Fuck, Brian, I am not sure if this means anything.”

“She has really gotten to you.” Brian sat up and looked at him.  “She wasn't mean to you, was she?”

“I’m a big boy…” 

“Ya, you proved that to me the other night!” Brian said, trying to lighten the mood.

“Brian, she wrote something down but then threw the page away.”

“And you picked it up and read it?”

“Well, ya, but she doesn’t know I took it.”

“You have it? Where is it? Let me read it!”

“Brian, I said I was surprised your dad hadn’t told you all this in one of your night’s of drinking.”

“Oh, ya, what did she say to that?”

“Remember, she changed her mind and didn’t want to blurt this out. It may be a lie, just something she wrote in haste.”

“Sunshine, show me the piece of paper!”

Brian reached out and Justin reached into his back pocket and pulled out the crumpled page. He handed it over and Brian looked at it. There were three words written on the paper. “Brian, remember there is no way to know if there is any truth to this.  She may have just said it to freak you out.”

Brian looked at it once more and then read it out loud.  “Not his father.” Brian stared at it as if he didn’t understand all the words.  “All those nights I sat at the bar buying him good whiskey and now she tells me Jack Kinney was not my father?”

Chapter 7

Brian was very quiet on Sunday.  Justin knew he needed some space so stayed around but out of his way for most of the day.  Jennifer came late in the afternoon to pick up Molly.  “Where’s Brian?” Jenn asked as she held Aaron, kissing his chubby cheek.  “This one is growing so fast.”

“Brian went out for a run.”

“I know Brian keeps in shape but since when does he just go out for a run, especially with the wind picking up like it is out there.”

“Mom, Joan has a lot of secrets and she is giving Brian just enough information to be tearing him apart.”

“Like what?”

“Well, we found out her real name is Catherine and that isn’t totally crazy.  Lots of people go by their middle name but yesterday she said Jack wasn’t Brian’s dad. Oh, and she has a twin sister who is in a mental hospital.”

“Wow, what is Brian doing about all of this?”

“Right now he is turning everything he thought he knew, over and over in his head.”

“Is someone looking into all this? Does his sister know anything?”

“Claire is clueless and tomorrow we will learn more about the aunt but this father thing …. He is going to have to learn more about that.  But right now I am giving him his space and as much as I like having you and Molly here, you better go. They say it is going to start snowing pretty soon and I don’t want you on the road if the weather gets bad.”

“You are probably right. Molly, time for us to go.  There’s a storm moving in and we need to get home”

Justin took Aaron from Jenn so she could hug Gus goodbye and then walked them to the door.  “If you see Brian on the road, send him home, ok?”

When Brian hadn’t returned a half hour later, Justin tried calling his phone but then heard it ring in his office.  “Damn,  Ronni?” he called loudly and she came out of her room.

“What is it?”

“I know you are off but can you watch the boys? Gus needs dinner but Brian hasn’t returned and he has been gone a couple hours and it is starting to snow.”

“Oh, yes, go.  Be careful.  It isn’t bad right now but this is supposed to be a bad one.”

Justin took his phone and grabbed his keys.  “I’ll let you know when I find him.”  With that Justin went into the garage and drove away.

James was out checking the property.  He wanted to make sure everything was secure if they got the blizzard that was predicted.  It was a little early in the year for a major storm but weather was never predictable.  The temperature had definitely dropped from yesterday and with the wind it was getting dangerously cold.  As he jogged from one area to another he thought about Emmett.  He was heating up some of his mother’s spicy stew and then promised to have something very special for dessert.  With Em that usually meant a new experiment in the bedroom which was always fine with him. Any chill he got out here would definitely be gone later tonight.  He came around the corner of the storage shed and wasn’t sure what he was seeing.

There was something leaning against the building. The sun had gone down and it was hard to see anything now that it was snowing. At first he thought it was a lawn chair that had gotten left outside the building but as he got closer, he realized it was Brian.

“Brian, are you alright? What are you doing out here?” James rushed to his assistance and nearly picked him up but Brian managed to get to his feet and James led him back to his place because it was close. “Em, come over here, quick!”James shouted when he got Brian into the house.

Emmett came into the kitchen obviously ready for date night.  “Oh my god, what happened to Brian?”

“Get him a cup of coffee and put a shot of something in it.” James sat him in front of the fireplace and threw another log to stoke the fire and then helped Brian out of his wet coat.  Brian still hadn’t said anything.  “Emmett, his pants are all wet.  Can you go grab some sweatpants? He needs dry clothes.”

“I’m alright.” Brian finally said something. 

Emmett walked over to Brian and sat next to him.  “Brian, what happened?” James moved away and went to get the pants himself.  Emmett knew Brian a lot better than he did.

“I went out for a run.  I got into a zone and then I realized how far I had gone and….I forgot my phone.”

“Oh, Justin is probably going crazy!” Em took the pants James was holding and said, “Thank’s, honey, Will you call Justin?” James bent and kissed Emmett before turning and walking a short distance away. “Brian, stand up and we will take those wet pants off.” Brian didn’t hesitate and stripped off his pants.  Naked from the waist down he pulled on the pants that Emmett handed him.

“Thanks, hadn’t seen me naked in a long time had you?” Brian’s sarcastic comment made Emmett relax a little.

“No but I get to see Jamesy regularly and if you have ever seen him  naked, which you never will… Brian, want to talk about it?”

“No I don’t,” he snapped but then relaxed. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why anything I learn about my mother surprises me. You’ll know everything when I do. What time is it?”

By now it was after 7:00 and when Emmett said that, Brian sighed. “Sunshine is going to be frantic.”

From somewhere behind him he heard James say, “Justin will be here in a couple minutes.”

“Brian, we’ll leave you alone. I can see him driving up now.” Em kissed Brian’s cheek, “Glad you are alright and Justin loves you.”

Brian nodded at Em, “That’s one thing I can count on in my life.”

As Emmett and Jamey slipped into their bedroom, Justin came rushing through the door and threw  himself into Brian’s arms. After a desperate hug and several kisses Justin moved a bit back so he could look in Brian’s eyes.  “Are you alright? What happened? Where were you?”

“I was lost in my head and by the time it started snowing I realized how far away I was and I was exhausted.  I just moved towards home and by the time I got to the shed and just planned to stand out of the wind for a minute.  Next thing I knew James found me on the ground.” Brian kissed Justin, barely grazing his lips. “I’m so sorry.  I didn’t mean to worry you. I didn’t mean to put myself through that.”

“I know, baby.  I am just so glad you are alright.  Gus asked for you before I left to look for you and his little face…’ This time the kiss was much more intense and as they separated there was fire in Justin’s eyes.  “I am going to go take that woman out of our poolhouse and dump her in a snowbank somewhere.”

Brian pulled him close, “No you’re not, because you would end up sharing a cell with your father and I can’t live without you, obviously.”

“It was James that saved you.”

“But you went looking for me.  She never came looking for me.  She knew I’d be at Debbie’s most of the time. Will you take me home, Sunshine? I want to share a hot bath with you and go to bed.”

Justin helped Brian into his coat and without saying goodbye Justin opened the passenger door and helped Brian in. When they walked into the house, everything was quiet.  The only lights on were above the kitchen area and Justin could see there was a pot on the stove that was steaming. 

“It looks like Ronni has something for us to eat.”

“I just…”

“You need to eat something and it is ready.  Come on.” Brian sat by the counter and Justin dished up two bowls of stew and cut two slices of homemade bread Tracy had made along with some herb flavored butter. Once Brian smelled it he realized how hungry he really was. They sat side by side until they had emptied the bowls and eaten the bread.

They walked hand in hand up the stairs and stopped by Gus’ room.  He was sitting on Ronni’s lap as she read him a story. When he saw his dads he looked at her and she lifted him off her lap and he ran to the door. “Daddy, where were you? Everyone was worried and see, Daddy Justin,  I told you Daddy would be alright. I love you, Daddy.” Gus gave Brian a kiss and then leaned over so Justin would take him.  “I love you, so much.” The little boy kissed Justin.  “Daddy, your face looks burnt.  There is no sun outside.”

“Your daddy has a frostbite.  That might be a bit painful tomorrow.”

“Does it hurt, Daddy?”

“If it hurts will you kiss it better tomorrow?”

“Sure I will.”

“Well, then it will be just fine.” Brian smiled at his son.

“Gus, why don’t you go listen to the rest of the story.  In the morning we will get you ready for school.”

“Ok, love you.”

Both men replied in kind and then quickly checked on Aaron before going into their own room.  Brian was really starting to feel the effects of the cold and the run. Justin started the bathtub water and then helped Brian undress and once he was settled in the water, Justin undressed and got in behind him. Brian leaned against Justin’s chest and Justin felt him start to relax. 

“Does your skin hurt?” Justin asked softly.

“Not too bad. It stings a bit but nothing worse than a mild sunburn.”

“Thank god, James found you when he did.  It could have been so…. Your mother has to go!”

“She will soon.”

“By Thanksgiving, Brian.  She needs to be gone by Thanksgiving and I will tell her if you don’t want to.  She is not a human…”

“Sunshine, not tonight, please. I need answers before ….”

“I’m sorry. I was just so scared. I didn’t know where you were. I thought you might have gotten hit by a car because of the snow and as I drove I kept looking at the side of the road.” Justin tightened his arms around Brian.  “Don’t do that again. I don’t know what I would do without you. At least if you go take your phone.”

Brian shifted so he could see Justin’s face and kissed him. “I know this is all crazy.  Now you are in the middle of it.”

“And you weren’t in the middle of my crazy family’s issues? I guess we are a perfect pair.” They kissed again and Justin touched the spots of red on Brian’s face. “Let’s get out and I will find some lotion for your face and you need to get some sleep.”

A few minutes later they were in bed. Justin had put some cream on Brian’s face and Brian’s head was on Justin’s shoulder, “Bri, can you take off tomorrow? I was thinking then you and I could go to the hospital and see if they will let us speak to your aunt rather than send the investigator.  Maybe if she sees you and knows who you are...I wish we knew how severe her problems are.”

“Will we be able to believe what she tells us?”

“Let’s try to get an appointment with her doctor in the morning. The doctor that helped with my case against my father has privileges there.  Maybe he will be able to get us connected.”

“I hope so.  I….I just want some answers about my life. Everything I thought I knew seems to have been a lie.”

“Just get some sleep.  We will figure it out in the morning.”

When Brian woke, his bed was empty and cold.  He got up and looked at himself in the mirror.  It looked like he was fortunate and his skin wouldn’t blister. He gently washed his face and put on more of the cream before going downstairs to see his family.  He knew that no matter what he found out, his sons and Justin were his family and they would always be there. He didn’t need anyone other than them.

“Daddy!  Does your face hurt? Should I kiss it and make it better?”

“Thank you, Gus, but I think it will be fine.  I’ll take a kiss anyway.” He smiled as Gus ran over and gave him a big hug and kiss.  

“That makes me feel better than almost anything in the world.”

“What makes you feel better?”

“A kiss from your other dad.” He walked over to the counter and kissed Justin and then the baby in his arms. He took Aaron from Justin and placed him in the crook of his arm as he got a cup of coffee. It wasn’t long before Ronni took Gus and Aaron upstairs, Justin and Brian could really talk.

“Brian, I called my doctor this morning.  He is fairly sure he has met your aunt and he will give us a call after talking to her doctor.  He is fairly sure we will be able to stop over this afternoon.” Justin said as he reached up and touched the spot on Brian’s cheeks.

Brian pulled him close.  “You do more work before I get up than I do the rest of the day.”

“You know that’s not true.  Oh ya, Len and James should be here in the next half hour.  They are going to take a look at my studio and then go get the supplies we need.”

“You know that guy, Len?” Brian said, “I get the feeling I should know him.”

“Well, remember James said he knew him from Babylon.  Maybe you saw him there.”

“I get the feeling we spent some time one on one if you get my drift.  I really don’t want to deal with him today. Is there anything I need to be involved with?”

“No, I will probably go up with them to make sure they know what I want and then, since James is with him, they can stay up there as long as they need to.”

“Great. I think I will go call the office and just check on what is going on there and then as soon as we hear from the doctor we will plan the rest of the day.”

After Brian left for his office,  Tracy appeared out of nowhere, it seemed. “Sometimes, I think he takes advantage of you.”

“You don’t have a clue what he does for me,” Justin responded.

“I didn’t mean that the way it sounded.  I just mean you were so worried yesterday and today you are dropping everything to go off with him.”

“Tracy, I know you came from a bad relationship but I would give my life for Brian and he would do the same for me. The two years my father separated us I didn’t feel like I could breathe. My father had told everyone I had died and he told me my family didn’t want me because of my injuries.”

“I can’t imagine Jenn ever…”

“If I had been thinking correctly I would have known but I had a brain injury and my thought process didn’t always work.  At first, Brian accepted it. He was in shock but when he started trying to get his life back, he said he just knew. So he started looking for me. If it wasn’t for Brian, I might still be living above a bodega in a small town in Pennsylvania thinking my family hated me.   I just can’t imagine a life without him and even more, I can’t imagine not having Aaron in my life.  Brian and I may never be able to have a biological child together but those boys are our blood and we are a family, maybe a bit unconventional, but a family just the same.”

Tracy had to swallow several times before she could say anything. “Can I say something, that may not be something you want to hear but something I need to say?”

“Sure, Tracy.”

“You were right in saying I came from a bad relationship.  The truth is, my parents are great separately, but they were not a great couple.  And I got involved too young with someone who didn’t want a partner but a slave.” She took a deep breath. “I saw how sweet you were with the boys, not to mention how gorgeous you are.” Justin flushed a bit.  “And I moved into a bit of a fairytale in my head.  I want a life like that and I guess I thought I could find a way into your life but I know how silly that is.  I really do.  I guess I should start packing.  I’m sure you don’t want me around.”

Just then there was noise outside the door.  “Tracy, we will finish this after I get Len started upstairs. Don’t start packing anything. James, Len, come on in.”

“Is this a good time?” James asked, always polite.

“Perfect. I was wondering if you would make it out here after the snow last night.”

“The main roads are clear. I thought Brian might be around, because of the snow.”

“He is but he is working in his office. Now,” Justin opened the door to the studio.  “What I need here is a beefed up ventilation system. Between my paint fumes and the cars below, I need to make sure it is safe up here, not only for me but sometimes the boys might be up here with me. I need to know it is safe for them.”

As Justin talked, Len moved around the space looking for the fuse box. “There are two ways to do this.  Do you prefer I run it through a window or to put it in the wall?”

“I would hate to take any of the natural lighting away from the space.  I would prefer it run through the wall.”

“Obviously, money isn’t a problem for Brian so I will go to the store and get a cost estimate of the supplies.”

“Do you have a timeline? Do you think it will be done this week or next?”

“It will depend on whether they have what I need.  But I will have it done by Thanksgiving, does that sound alright?”

“That sounds great. James has the credit card to pay for the supplies and he said you agreed with the pay?”

“Yes, Brian has always been a generous man. It is obvious you know that.”

“Um, actually I will be paying you.  It is my studio and I have money of my own. Well, Brian and I share most of our money but we each have our own business accounts and that is what will be paying for this.”  Justin could tell Len had stopped listening.  “Well, I need to go.  James will you please just make sure the door is locked when you leave.”

“I will, Justin.  Will you be home all day?” James asked.

“No, I …” Justin’s phone rang.  “I think we will be leaving for a bit. I need to take this.” With that Justin walked out the door and answered the call.

An hour later, Justin and Brian pulled into the parking lot of the hospital. Brian turned off the vehicle but didn’t make a move to get out.  Justin reached over and took his hand. “So what are you concerned about?” he asked as he turned to face Brian.

“Honestly, I think I am most worried that she won’t be able to help at all. I wonder if she still looks like her.  As kids they obviously looked very similar. It is just going to be so odd.  Did your doctor say anything more?  I mean…”

Justin reached over and touched Brian’s cheek.  “You don’t have to do this. I can go talk to her.”

“No, I need to do this. But don’t go anywhere when we are in there.  I just don’t know…”

“You know by now, I am not going anywhere without you.” He reached over and put a hand behind Brian’s head and pulled him close.  “I will always be here for you. I love you.” Their lips touched and Justin felt Brian relax a bit.

“I couldn't do this without.”

“You don’t have to. We need to go in.  He squeezed us in.”  

They walked into the building and followed the directions Justin had been given after checking in at the main desk.  As they walked they heard noises coming from other halls.”

“Why do places like this freak me out?”

“Because we are all one accident away from being here.” 

They walked in silence the rest of the  way to the office and knocked on the door. “Come in.”

“Justin, you look wonderful.  And this must be Brian.”

“Yes, thank you so much for getting us in.”

“I felt like I needed to.  Justin, it is great to see you doing so amazing but Anna Claire is kind of a favorite here and part of the reason she is, is because she has no one.  She has been here thirty years and she has not left.  She hasn’t had a visitor since she arrived.”

“None? No one has been here?” Justin looked shocked.

“Well, that’s not quite true.  Brian, your mother came by once, according to the records, and Anna Claire had such a reaction, your mother was banned.  Just so you know, your mother has kept in touch with her doctor but your aunt says she doesn’t want to see her.”

“Doctor, is she lucid?” Brian asked.  “Should I tell her who I am? I don’t want to upset her.”

“She is unpredictable.  Not that she is violent or anything like that but some days she is with us and others, not so much. I think if you are gentle with her, she will love you and be very responsive. And on that, I really do have to go.  If you wait here, I will send someone to bring you to Anna.  Just relax.  It could be 10 minutes or so but someone will come and get you.”

“Thank you for everything.”

“If this helps Anna Claire, I will be very excited.” They both shook his hand and he was gone. 

Justin slipped his arms around Brian’s waist, “How are you doing, babe.”

“I’m scared as hell but, I’m more worried once she finds out who I am she’ll shut down or kick me out.”

“Brian, just show her this side. Your heart will shine if you let it.”

Justin stepped close and looked up hoping Brian would kiss him and, of course, he did. There was a soft knock and the door opened.  “Mr. Kinney, I’ll take you to your aunt.” As they walked through several hallways, their guide stated, “We tried to prepare her for your visit. She doesn’t get many visitors.”

“DId you tell her who I was?”

“I told her you were a relative.  She did mention one of her brothers, who I have heard haven’t been around for 40 years. I have to admit I am a little nervous for her.  She truly is a sweet woman that just has a hard time with reality.  Please be gentle with her.” She stopped at the door to a small visitor’s room.  “If you need me, I will be at that nurse’s station.” She pointed down the hall.

“Thank you for the advice,” Justin said as she walked away.   Justin squeezed Brian’s hand and walked in the room together.

“Hello, Anna Claire.” Justin smiled at the woman sitting with her back to the door. 

She turned around and both Brian and Justin took in a breath.  There was no doubt this woman was Joan’s twin.  They looked so much alike, however, Anna Claire appeared to be 20 years younger.  She looked more like Joan’s daughter than her sister.

“You are too young to be one of my brothers but as soon as I saw you I knew that.  I know exactly who you are.  You are that wicked woman’s  son.”

“Hello.  You are right, I am Joan’s son.  I hope that doesn’t upset you.”

“You have never done anything to me.” She started but then got very quiet.  She looked out the window for a minute and then turned around and looked at Brian, “How have you been, Kevin? It has been so long.  I hoped you would come and see me.” She was paused again.  “I’m sorry, you are not Kevin.  You must be her son. You are as beautiful as Kevin.  And you are built like him.”

“Aunt Anna Claire, may I call you that?”

“Of course you can. I am proud to have such a beautiful nephew.  What is your name?”

“Oh, I’m sorry, I am Brian and this is my friend, Justin.”

“If I am not mistaken, he is more than a friend.”

Brian put his arm around Justin’s waist, “Justin is my partner, my husband.”

“Well, it is nice to meet you Justin.”

“Kevin, sorry Brian…” Anna Claire went somewhere else again. She sat looking at the wall but it was obviously she wasn’t actually there.

Justin sat near her and stroked her hand softly as he took it. “Anna Claire, who is Kevin?”

“Kevin is my boyfriend.  He is so handsome, isn’t he?” She looked at Brian.

“Oh, yes he is.” Justin looked at Brian and smiled.

“He’s not like that loser Catherine is married to.  She lets him call her Joan.  Why isn’t Catherine a good enough name.  Catherine Kinney.  She doesn’t dare come here again!” Anna started to get agitated so Justin tried to redirect her.

“Anna, tell me about Kevin.  You weren’t married?” Justin continued.

“No, he asked me though.  See, I still have his ring.” She held up her hand and she did have a lovely ring on her finger.

“What happened to Kevin?”

“She couldn’t stand it that I was in love with such a good man.  She had married the first man she had sex with.   But Jack Kinney wasn’t enough for her. She was always unhappy.  The only time I saw her smile was when she was looking at my Kevin.”

“Aunt Anna, I know Joan did something to upset you.  What did she do?”

“You were there, Kevin.  You know what happened! You were there!” Brian withdrew.  He glanced at Justin, and then fled the room. He needed a minute and more importantly, he felt his aunt didn’t need him there.

Justin was torn.  He wanted to go out to Brian but he felt she  was close to telling him something. He held her hand and just sat quietly with her for a few minutes. 

“I did bad, didn’t I.  That’s not Kevin.”

“Can you tell me what happened, Anna?”

“I am very tired.  You go after him.  You belong with him.  Just like Kevin belonged to me, not her.” She got up and went to the door, “Lily, take me to my room.  I need to go to my room.” She called out into the hall.  

Several other patients could be heard yelling now, “Lily.” “Lily.”  Several of them repeated Anna. 

As the young woman who had guided them walked up with a gentleman, Anna looked at Brian who was leaning against a nearby wall. “Will you come back tomorrow?”

Brian walked over, “If you would like us to.”

Anna Claire hugged Justin.  “Not you.  Just him. I will see you tomorrow?”

“You will see me tomorrow if I’m allowed but just me?” 

“Yes, it hurts too much to see him.” She nodded at Brian and with that Anna Claire walked away, Lily followed her.

“Gentlemen, I will help you find your way out.” They walked together down the long halls, “How did your conversation go? Anna is a sweet woman. Often she  seems to go somewhere.”

“Does she often talk about her past? Do you know how she got here?”

“I know it has to do with her fiance and her sister. Some say her sister married her boyfriend.  Others say her sister ran off with him.  But if I had to guess her sister had an affair with him.”

“Why do you think that?”

“She refuses to see her sister but she cries at the loss of her boyfriend.”

“Am I allowed to come back tomorrow?”

“That would have to be cleared with her doctor but I don’t think there will be a problem.” Justin gave him one of his business cards.  “An artist? You aren’t looking for a side job, are you? So many of our residents love art but we lost our art director to funding.  We have been looking for a volunteer or two that could maybe come once a month to do some art projects with them.  We would love to get two people. If we had someone come every two weeks that would mean only once a month for the volunteer.”

“Let me think about it.  We have two small boys at home that keep me pretty busy but I could manage once a month. Hopefully, I will be back tomorrow and we can talk more.  Come back tomorrow and I will set you up with the right person.”

Justin and Brian walked out hand in hand. “Brian, are you alright?”

“Ya, did she say anything more to you?”

“Nothing I can be sure about but with what she said and what our escort just said, I am wondering if Joan had an affair with Kevin. And whoever this Kevin is, could be your father. That could be totally off, because it could be that she calls a lot of people Kevin. I don’t want to get your hopes up.”

“Maybe tomorrow I will make another trip to the old neighborhood and maybe bring Mrs. Connor some flowers.”

“And pump her for some answers?”

“I can see what she knows.”

“Have Tracy bake some goodies.  I have a feeling Mrs. Connor has a sweet tooth.”

“How is Tracy? She’s been really odd lately.”

“Damn,” Justin remembered he had not gone back to her this morning. “We were talking things out this morning when James and Len arrived and I didn’t get back to her.  I hope she didn’t go anywhere.  She really is a great help and she seems to be able to deal with your mother better than anyone else here.”  

As they got to the vehicle, Brian opened the door for Justin and kissed him. “You are far too good for me.” 

Once Brian was behind the wheel Justin spoke up, “Speaking of acting weird, that Len is an odd one.  Have you remembered how you know him?”

“I have a feeling he was just one of the back room boys.  “Maybe I had him come over one night but that would have been it.”

“I thought you always said I was the only one you fucked more than once.”

“Well, there may have been one or two but you are the only one that counts.” He kissed Justin’s hand and then put both hands on the wheel. The road was still slick from yesterday’s snow.  “Are you seriously thinking about doing some art at the hospital?”

“I am. Once or twice a month wouldn’t take up much of my time and I know how much art helps me.”

“I am sure they would love it.”

“I think it might be good for me too.”

James had gone to the hardware store with Len and when they had finished Len said he would call James in a couple days, when he knew his schedule at the car service. James had stopped by the house to see Emmett before Em left for a catering job.  They ended up in bed and as they laid together after making love, James was a little too quiet as Em chattered on.

“What’s the matter, James? A few minutes ago, nothing was wrong with you, that’s for sure.” He kissed his nose, but you are quiet, even for you.”

“I was just thinking about Len.  He is an odd guy.  I think he still has a crush on Brian but then again, there are probably a lot of men that do. Brian was such a god at Babylon. Len just seems to be in a bit of a time warp.  Brian hasn’t been in that scene for well over two year. Maybe he just has to get it out of his system.  He will realize Brian is just a man, a great father and husband.”

“Just keep an eye on him when he is working there.  I don’t like him and I don’t want him stealing anything just because it is Brian Kinney’s.” Emmett’s hand moved down James’ powerful back. “And now, I think we should get a little more exercise before I go to work.”

“My pleasure,” James responded as he rolled Emmett over on his back.

Once Brian and Justin pulled into the garage, Justin got out and waited for Brian to walk around the car. Justin  put his arms around Brian’s waist and kissed him.  “Why don’t you play with the boys for a while? I need to talk to Tracy if she is home and then maybe Gus can help me make dinner and it can just be the four of us.”

“I love you. What would I do without you helping put this into perspective? I do need to call the priest.  I have a feeling she can’t lie to a priest as easily as she lies to me.”

Brian entered the house and went directly over to his boys who were both playing in front of the fireplace with Ronni overseeing their activities. “Ronni, take the night off.  Go take a hot bath, watch your favorite movie.  Call that man you act like you don’t have and talk sexy to him.”

“Brian! My love life,” she tried to sound serious but had to start laughing. “Are you sure? I was planning on working a couple more hours.”

“No, go.  I need my boys. Gus is going to make dinner.”

“Daddy, I can’t make dinner!  I’m too little and I can’t touch the stove.”

“Well, how about with Daddy J helping you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, your daddy said he would need your help.”

“Yeah, where did he go?”

“He’ll be back in a minute,” he said as he tackled Gus onto the rug and the giggling began.

Justin walked down the hall and after checking the laundry room, he went on to Tracy’s room and knocked. “Is that you, Ronni?”

“No, it’s me.” Justin said. “I wanted to finish our conversation.”

“Just a minute.” He could hear a little noise and then the door opened. “Sorry, I was just getting dressed.  I have to leave in a few minutes.  I am helping Emmett with a catering job.”

“I just felt like we needed to finish our conversation.”

“I am sorry, Justin. I think you are just such a loving man and such a good daddy, I just started fantasizing about having a relationship with someone like you.  That is all I have ever wanted in my life. I want to find someone to love and who loves me.  I want to be a mom with an equal partner to raise a kid or two.”

“Tracy, you’ll find him and I hope you will continue to work for us.  You are doing a great job and you are the only one who puts up with Joan.”

“Thank you, Justin.  I couldn’t find a better job. And I don’t want to be rude, but Emmett will be here in a few minutes….”

“Oh, of course.  I have a cooking date with my son so I better go anyway.”

Justin and Gus worked on dinner.  Gus stood on a step stool and Aaron sat in a seat on the island so he could watch them. “Where is Daddy? He would like to help cook, too.”

“He had a phone call to make but he will be here to help very soon.”

“I thought we could each make our own pizzas.  What do you think?”

“I get a whole pizza?”

“You sure do!”

Brian sat at his desk.  He looked at the number for Father Tom Butterfield. He was trying to figure out how much to ‘confess’ to the priest.  He wanted him to help but he wasn’t sure he would be willing to do that.  He picked up his phone and entered the number and waited.

“Father Tom.” he answered.

“This is Brian Kinney.  I don’t know if you remember…”

“Oh, sure, Brian.  I remember you.  How is your mother? I have tried to call her several times but she isn’t at her home.”

“That’s because she is at mine, making life difficult.”

“How is she doing? I’m sorry, you called me.  What can I do for you?”

“Well, my mother wants you to visit.” 

“I would be happy to come see her. I have time tomorrow afternoon.  Do you think that would work for her?”

“I am sure it would. There is something I am going to tell you and I don’t know if you will think I am a jackass for telling you or if you will think you should know.”

“Brian, your mother has told me over the years that you two don’t really have a relationship so I am very surprised she is…”

“That I have her at my house? Well, she is actually living in my pool house and I don’t spend much time with her but something new has developed.  Well, I guess it is actually old but it is new to me.”

“What are you trying to say, Brian?”

“Did she ever tell you she had a twin sister?”

“Actually, that did come up once.”

“What did she say?”

“Brian this was in confession.”

“So you know she has lots of secrets and lies. Did you know she had an affair and it is very likely that Jack Kinney wasn’t my father?” His silence told Brian this was new to him. “I know you aren’t going to say anything to me about this and that’s fine but I think some of her cheery disposition comes from her secrets. I think she can’t live with herself so she doesn’t want anyone else to be happy either.”

“Your mother, well, even though she is alway pleasant with me, I have seen the other side and what you just told me could be part of the cause.”

“Since you know she has a sister, did you know that her sister is in the mental hospital and has been for more than 30 years?  The affair was with her sister’s boyfriend. I don’t know details but I will figure it out.”

They finished the conversation and Tom would be there at 3:00.  Brian figured that would give him enough time to visit Mrs. Connor while Justin visited his aunt again and then they could be back here by 3:00.

The Taylor-Kinney crew had a great evening.  Gus loved making his pizza and after everyone was full, they all sat on the sofa and watched a movie of Gus’ choice. Soon Brian was carrying Gus up the stairs and Justin followed with Aaron.  Brian tucked Gus in while Justin did the same with Aaron.’

“Daddy,” Gus said groggily, “Can Daddy J come give me a kiss.”

“Of course he can.  Love you, Gus.”

Gus reached up and hugged Brian, “I love you, too, Daddy.”

Brian walked into the nursery just as Justin laid Aaron down. “Gus wants Daddy J to give him a kiss.”

“I love the Daddy J thing.  Why don’t you put some of that lotion on your cheeks and nose and I will meet you in bed in a few minutes.” Justin dropped a quick kiss on Brian’s mouth but Brian pulled him back and when they separated, Justin was flushed.  “I’ll be right there.”

Justin slipped into Gus’ room quietly.  “Is that you Daddy J?”

“Yes, it is Gus.” He walked over and sat on the edge of the bed and leaned over to give Gus a hug and kiss. “Good night, son.”

“Good night, Daddy.  You know what? Some of my friends at school say they are sad for me because I don’t have my moms here to give me hugs and kisses and I miss them but I have two dads and I get lots of hugs and kisses.” Gus barely got it out before turning over and drifting off.

Justin was afraid his heart would explode.  He couldn’t imagine being able to handle any more love than he had right now. He walked over to their room and rushed into Brian’s arms and kissed him long and almost desperately.  They both lost their clothes quickly and then Brian was sinking into Justin. It was fast and furious and soon they were both covered in a sheen of sweat and then they dropped onto the mattress.

“I am not complaining but what brought that on?” Brian said as they laid in each other’s arms.

“My heart was going to explode if I didn’t do something with all the love I was feeling. Those boys of ours couldn’t be more perfect.”

“I totally agree.”

“So you are able to go with me again tomorrow? I mean, into the city? If you drop me off and go on to Mrs. Connor and maybe between her and Anna we will get the answers we are looking for.

The next morning, Brian and Justin drove Gus to school and they went on to their destinations.  Brian dropped Justin off and, with a box of pastries, went back to his old neighborhood.  He had called Mrs. Connor yesterday and she said she would have coffee ready.  Soon they were sitting at her kitchen table with steaming coffee and gooey sweets.

“Someone at your house made these.  Oh, these are good.”  Mrs. Connor took a hearty bite.

“Yes, Tracy is in culinary school.  She cooks for us and helps with both our boys and with Joan right now.”

After chatting a little more, the older woman touched Brian’s hand.  You didn’t come here to feed an old lady.  What do you want to ask?”

“We met my aunt yesterday.  Justin is talking to her right now but she didn’t want me to come back so soon.  She called me Kevin several times while I was there.  She went back and forth from being present to being somewhere else.  Mrs. Connor, do you know who Kevin was?”

“Yes, Kevin was engaged to Anna Claire.  She was so happy but she was always fragile.  I don’t know exactly what happened but the rumors were that one night Kevin had too much to drink and he stopped by your house because Anna was supposed to be staying there.  Your mother may be the only one who really knows what happened.  But the results  changed the lives of Anna Claire and Kevin, well your mother, forever.”

“Mrs.Connor, do you know what happened to Kevin? Did Anna send him away?“

“Brian, all I know is the story that went around.”

“Please tell me.”

“When Kevin realized what he had done, he confessed to your aunt and it broke her.  She was always fragile but Kevin had loved her so.”

“And he didn’t try…” Brian couldn’t imagine losing Justin because of something stupid he had done.

“She was almost catatonic at first.  When he tried to visit she had violent reactions so they asked him to stop coming.”

“Mrs. Connor, I don’t mean to be rude but I need to know what happened to Kevin. Where is he?’

“Brian, I am not sure where he is but I can tell you what he is. He left and joined the monastery. Last I heard he was a priest in New York.”

Chapter 8

Brian sat in his vehicle in stunned silence.  He could have dealt with a father in jail.  He would have known what to do if the man was homeless and lived under a bridge. But what in the hell was he going to do with a priest? He hadn’t done church in years unless doing the priest counted and that had been a bit ago. He kept watching the door, needing to talk to Justin.  He was about to get out of the vehicle when he saw Justin walking toward him.  He got out and stood watching him walk.  Justin saw him and started jogging toward him.

“Sorry, you had to wait. I got caught up talking about the art program and then…” Brian’s mouth came down on Justin’s to quiet him. He felt he needed to silence him and by kissing him it calmed his nerves a bit. “Bri, are you alright?” He put his arms around Brian and felt his whole body vibrate. “Did Mrs. Connor tell you something?”

“Sunshine, will you drive home?”

“Sure, darling.  What happened?”

“I just need to think. Did you learn anything from Anna?”

“Anna wasn’t with us today.  Lily said she has been in her own little world since yesterday.”

“Oh, shit, we broke her.”

“It is normal for her, I was told.  We just happened to hit her on a really good day. Lily admitted she seemed to be a bit restless because of our visit but she was no help.  What did you learn? Did she know anything about Kevin and where he is?”

“Well, sort of.”

“Sort of?””

“Last time she heard of him he was in New York.”

“Did she know anything about him? Do you have any brothers or sisters?”

“I hadn’t even thought of that but I think the answer to that will be no.”

“Why, has he died? Has something happened to him?”

“Justin, after Anna had her breakdown he became a priest.  My father is a father.”

“Holy shit,” Justin said softly. “Did Mrs. Connor know what happened?”

“She only knew what the rumors were. It was said that Kevin came to my parents house expecting to find Anna.  He had been drinking and was out of it.  Well, he thought Joan was Anna and Joan didn’t protest. He confessed to Anna what happened and that is when she had her break from reality.”

“And you were conceived that night?”

“So it is said. You know I just realized I didn’t get a last name? I’ll have to call Mrs. Connor.”

“Brian, I think I have that.  Lily looked back in Anna Claire’s file and found the next of kin.  There was a name there.”

“And?”

“His name was Kevin, are you ready for this?”

“Justin, I am not in the mood for games.”

“Brian, if all of this is correct, your father’s name is Kevin Taylor.”

Brian tipped his head back and laughed loudly.  “Well, finally a name I would be proud to have.”

“You don’t have any long lost uncles do you? I wonder if my mother even realizes what your last name is?”

“I honestly don’t know.  What are you going to do next, Brian?”

“I am going to go have a conversation with my….her.  I promised I would have her out of here by Thanksgiving and that is only a couple weeks away so I am going to push her and then I am going to go dump her at her front door.”

“Brian, she isn’t ready to go without some assistance.”

“I know.  I talked to the agency that has been supplying the therapists and they say she doesn’t need nearly as much therapy anymore and it is much cheaper to hire home health care than therapists so her insurance will now cover her assistance at home.”

“I can’t wait to get her out of our place.  She has been nothing but a pain in the ass since Ronni insisted she come to our place.  Well, now she is on her way out.”

“I plan to talk to her the next couple days but after that I hope I never have to lay sight on her again.”

Justin pulled into the driveway and noticed a small car parked by the garage and next to it was a few pieces of wood and a box which Justin could only imagine was the ventilation system. As the garage door moved up Len stood in the front of the garage.

Brian walked directly into the house, not wanting to make small talk. Justin sat in the car for a second longer and saw the way Len watched Brian walk. He watched Len lick his lips as Brian closed the door to the house. He was glad his studio was being upgraded and then he hoped he never had to see this guy again.  He wasn’t sure what it was but he gave him the creeps.

“Hey, Len, were you able to get everything you needed for the project?”

“James told me he had dropped off the supplies and I told him I would move it into the garage and I will be back tomorrow to start the project.”

“Oh, that’s great.  I am looking forward to having a safe place to work and have my boys with me.”

“Brian looks like he has managed to play dad well.”

“He isn’t playing.  He is one of the best fathers I have ever seen.”

“Well, considering where your father is, you don’t have the best example.” Len smiled but it was a smile that didn’t reach his eyes and a shiver ran through him.  

“I will help you grab the supplies and then you can enjoy the rest of your day.”

“You and Brian still play now and then?”

“No, once we found each other again we committed.”  Justin grabbed some of the supplies and brought them in and so did Len.

“What do you have that kept the great Brian Kinney?”  He set down the wood he carried.

“I guess I have his heart.” Justin said as he pushed the remote by the door and it slowly went down, leaving Len on the outside.

As Len got in his car he mumbled to himself. “I wonder who’d claim it if you were gone.” He looked at the house and he pulled away.

Brian was sitting at the counter glowering at Ronni and the look Ronni was giving her told Jusitn something had gone on. “That one of yours, Justin, you can deal with him.  I will go and check on the beautiful child that somehow came from his seed.” Ronni walked toward the steps and stopped.”There is some tasty stew warming and some bread, too, if you want it.”

“Thanks, Ronni.” Justin forgot about his encounter with Len. It wasn’t important. He glanced at the clock and saw it was after 1:00.  Neither of them had eaten since early this morning so he dished up two bowls and grabbed some rolls.  Justin knew it was best to give Brian a little time but he pushed the bread across to where Brian was sitting and then he sat down next to him and set a bowl in front of each of them.  He leaned over and kissed Brian’s shoulder, “Eat at least a little bit.”

Brian opened his mouth but instead of saying something he decided to pick up his spoon and took a bite. “She can be such a bitch!”

“My guess is she asked how the morning went?”

“It is none of her business!”

“She just cares about us.”

“Are you on her side?”

“Brian, we are all on the same side.  You know that.” Justin reached toward his face but Brian pushed his hand aside. “Come on, Brian.  You were quiet on the way home but now you’re damn right hostile. We’re not the enemy.”

Brian took a couple more bites and then reached for Justin’s hand. “I know you’re right.  I’m sorry. I am just so angry…. What if ….

Justin kissed him and ran his fingers through Brian’s hair. “Do you want me to go with you when Butterfield gets here?”

“I….yes, I’m sorry to make you go back out there but, I just can’t trust myself.  I’m afraid I’ll just end up yelling and that isn’t going to help anything.”

“Is the father stopping by here first?”

“Yes, I told him I wanted to talk to him before I brought him to her.”

“Ronni’s got the boys so I want to go with you. It will be fun to watch her squirm.”

“Do you think she will even react?” Brian rested his forehead on Justin’s

“I’ve been wondering that.” Justin rested his hand on the back of Brian’s neck. “I think she will if Tom is willing to back us up a little.  I know he’s a priest but he’s a priest that lives on the edge. All he needs to do is say she owes her son the truth.”

“And it’s true.  She has lied to me all my life.  I just want the truth.” He tugged Justin off the stool and pulled him between his legs.  “Thank you.  I will apologize to Ronni later.” His hands were just working their way onto Justin’s ass when Brian’s phone and the doorbell rang simultaneously. “Damn,” he said under his breath. He glanced at the number. “I’ll be right back.” He went to his office.

“I’ll get the door,” Justin moved to the front of the house while Brian headed to his office..  “Hey, come in.” After shaking hands he looked at Father Tom in his collar.  “What do you prefer to be called? Father Tom? Father Butterfield?”

“Tom, please.”

“Thanks for coming, Tom. Brian just had a business call come in but he will be with us shortly. Since we have a minute, Brian is very upset and he has a right to be.  Can I give you an idea of what is going on? I know Joan is one of your parishioners but she is a wicked woman.”

“Wicked is a strong word, Justin, or would you prefer to be called Mr. Taylor?” He smiled.

“Touche’.” Justin said. “Tom, can I get you a cup of coffee?”

“No, what has Joan Kinney done to make her so wicked.”

“In brief, she slept with her sister’s fiance and then didn’t tell Brian that Jack wasn’t his father.  And her sister has been hospitalized ever since.”  Tom stood there with his mouth open. “She has been heartless to him since his birth and now it might all make sense.”

“What is it you want me to do?” Tom asked softly.

“I want you to make her tell me the truth!” Brian’s voice came from behind them.

“Brian.” Tom said with a nod. “I think you know I can’t make her tell you the truth. It sounds like you have learned the truth.”

“Well, that is partially true.I know my father’s name is Kevin.”

Justin continued, “Brian wants to find out who his father is. We don’t know if she will tell us. And maybe if she won’t, you could help us,” he added.

“Now I’m confused,” Father Tom said.  “Was he Catholic? Do you want me to look into church records?”

“Well, you see, Tom, you take after my father more than I do.” Brian commented. Justin could see Brian’s patience was running low.

“And what does that mean, Brian?”

Justin put a hand on Brian’s arm, “After Kevin realized what he had done and that he had lost his love, we were told he went to a monastery and is now…”

“My father is a priest or at least that is the story.”

Now Tom looked at Brian and saw the pain he was really in.  He stepped toward Brian and put his hand on his shoulder. “Brian, I will do my best to help get the information for you, whether that means from your mother or through the church.”

Brian nodded and Justin said, “Thanks, Tom.  That means a lot.”

“If you direct me, I’ll go talk to your mother.”

“She has never been my mother.  She may have given birth to me but that is all she ever did for me. I’m going with you.  I want to see if she has the guts to tell me what she really did.”

“Brian, vengeance….”

“Vengeance is mine, says the Lord.  Well, back in the day I was called a god.” He stopped and took a deep breath. Justin put an arm around Brian’s waist. “Just once I would like to see if she will do what is right.” He put an arm around Justin’s shoulders and pulled him close.

“Follow us, Tom.” Justin and Brian led the way out the back door and over to the pool house.

Brian and Justin hung back and let Tom walk in first.  “Oh, Father Tom, it is so good to see you.  I didn’t think HE would ever call you.”

“Do you mean your son?”

“Well, of course I do!” she snapped but then remembered who she was talking to.  “He has just kept me here.”

“Well, from how well you are speaking at the moment, I think you could have called me yourself.” Tom’s voice was gentle but made his point.  “Your son has a lovely home and husband.”

“Sodomist!” Joan scowled at Brian and Justin as they walked in.

“Joan, your son and his husband obviously love each other and, from everything I can see, have supplied you with a nice place to stay and good healthcare.”

“He doesn’t care.  He has only come by a couple of times in the month I have been here but, who wants to come visit his sick, widowed mother.”

“Oh, stop the bullshit. Poor widow my ass.  A cheating whore is more like it.”

At the same time Justin and Tom said, “Brian!”

“No, it is time this was said.  Who was Kevin? Was his last name Taylor? Don’t you think I have a right to know who my father really is. I don’t mean the drunk you were married to but the man you screwed one night that drove your sister into a hospital over 30 years ago. What was his last name?”

Justin tried to get Brian to move out the door but he had his eyes locked with his mother. Justin stepped between them and forced Brian to look at him.  “Brian, why don’t you go back to the house.  You trust me, right?”

Brian looked at Justin, and nodded. “Go play with the boys and I’ll be in shortly.”  Brian opened his mouth and was going to say something and then he turned and walked out.

Before turning to face Joan and Tom, Justin took a deep breath.  He wanted to lash out at her like Brian had.  He couldn’t understand how a human could treat another human that way, especially your own child. He turned but didn’t say anything. He just looked at Tom.

“Joan, it seems like your son is very stressed because of something he learned about his past.”

“Do you really believe those two?” she said, now looked at Justin.

“Joan, we have all made mistakes and if that is what happened, don’t you think it is Brian’s right to know his true lineage?” Tom went on, “I am sure it hasn’t been easy to keep this all these years.”

Justin saw Joan starting to shut down.  He walked over and pulled a chair right in front of her. “Joan, was his name Kevin Taylor? Brian deserves to know if not for himself, for his son.” Justin shrugged at her silence and then stood and looked at Tom.  “Stop by the house before you leave. Stay for dinner if you can.”

As Justin walked out the door he heard her say, “I have never been invited for dinner.”

“Joan, now that we are alone I can take your confession if you would like.” Tom put the stole he had brought along on.

“Father Tom, you can’t agree with my son’s way of life. The Bible says it is wrong.”

Tom looked directly in her eyes, “The Bible says lying is wrong, too.”

She looked surprised at his response. “So you are believing what he told you?”

“Brian and I spoke before I arrived and I did a little research into this.”  That was partly true.  He looked up Joan’s history at the church. She had been baptized and married in the church. “I saw records of Anna Claire.  She is your daughter’s Godmother.”

“She was weak.” 

“I saw records of her doing so many good things for the church,” Tom stated.

“All she did was smile,” she said a little softer.

“Happy people are so pleasant to be around.”

“But she was mentally feeble.  I mean she just fell apart.” Joan no longer looked him in the eye.

“What caused her to fall apart?”

Joan was silent for a moment but then stiffened and in a flat tone said, “I may have made a mistake but I raised him by myself.  My husband was no help.”

“But Joan, why all the hate? He didn’t cause the situation.” 

“He was always an unpleasant child.”

“He was a child.  Maybe you are placing unpleasantness in the wrong place.  But, I will say goodbye now.  I have a dinner invitation I plan to accept.” Tom had never been so rude to a parishioner but it was time for him to leave.  “If you ever want to make a confession, feel free to call.” With that, Tom zipped up his jacket and walked to the door. He turned and looked at her, “You know you can confess without me around.  Was Kevin’s last name Taylor?”

As he pulled the door shut he was sure he heard her say, “Yes.”

When Justin had arrived back at the house, Ronni had the boys and pointed up the stairs.  “Thanks.  By the way, I think Father Tom will be staying for dinner.”

Justin went upstairs and walked into the bedroom.  He found Brian staring out the window onto the pool area.  He wrapped his arms around him from behind. “Are you alright, darling?”

Brian took Justin’s hands as Justin dropped his head on his back. “Did she say anything to you?”

“Nothing worth repeating.  I tried to get her to admit Kevin’s last name but she didn’t say anything.”

“You weren’t begging her when you went in front of her, were you?”

“You could see me?”

“Yes, just like I can see Tom put on the stole right now.”

“I was just trying to talk to her.  I guess showing the love I have for you doesn’t go very far with her.”

Brian turned around and put his arms around Justin, pulling him close. “You know that’s enough, right? You and the boys, that is more than I deserve.” Brian’s mouth descended down to Justin who accepted the kiss eagerly.

When they separated, Justin rested his head on Brian’s chest. “I invited Tom to stay for dinner.”

“Why did you do that?”

“Because I’m nice,” he said as he smiled up at him. “It’s dinner time and he may have learned something else but think about it, Brian.  He doesn’t have a family to eat with.”

“You are nice.  I can’t argue with that,” Brian hugged Justin. 

Justin saw  movement over Brian’s shoulder.  “He is on his way back to the house. Let’s go down.”

“I’d love to go down but we have company.” Brian gave Justin’s crotch a little squeeze and he smiled.  “I love you, Sunshine.”

“I love you, too, Brian.”

“My name is Tom.  And what is your name?”

“I’m Gus and my brother’s name is Aaron.  He can’t talk yet but he is getting bigger.”

“Well, he has a big brother to talk for him.”

“Do you know my daddies?”

“I do. I also know your…”

“Tom, glad you could join us,” Brian interrupted just before Tom could finish his sentence. “Gus, Tom works at a church and he knows Joan. He came to visit her and is going to eat dinner with us.”

“Will you sit next to me?” Gus asked the priest.

“You won’t eat my food will you?” Tom smiled down at him and Gus giggled.

“Ronni always makes lots.”  

Brian poured four glasses of wine. Ronni took a sip when Brian handed it to her. He kissed her cheek and she patted his.

“I need to bring Joan her meal and then I will be back and serve up the meal.” She looked over at the priest, “Sir, are you on a timeline?”

“No, I am in no rush. I would enjoy getting to know this young man a little better.”  Gus smiled up at Tom. 

“Do you like to fix puzzles?” Gus asked.

“Gus, our guest may….”

“I would love to fix a puzzle, Gus.”

Brian and Justin sat on the sofa with Aaron moving back and forth between the two of them.  They watched Tom and Gus’ interaction.  “You know he is with a lot of people but I wonder how often he spends time like this?” Justin said softly. “He’s really good with him.” 

Brian pulled Justin against him and Aaron crawled up Justin’s chest and kissed him sloppily.  Brian reached over Justin and lifted Aaron up and he squealed happily. Soon they were all sitting around the table with Ronni and Justin putting the food on the table.  Everyone chatted and ate.  Tom talked to everyone but made sure Gus felt included and when he started getting restless Ronni took both boys upstairs to start getting ready for bed.

The men cleared the table together and then each took their glasses of wine and sat on the sofa, Justin relaxing against Brian. 

“You two have a wonderful family, despite the woman in the pool house.”

“Did she say anything after Justin left?” Brian asked.

“She seemed to verify that his name is Kevin Taylor. Justin, you don’t have any relatives…?”

“Not that I know of and I doubt my mother will know since it would have all happened long before she married my father and as far as I know his family wasn’t Catholic.”

“It is not an unusual name.  More than likely you aren’t related. I will do some looking into Kevin Taylor for you.” Tom looked at Brian, “I am sorry, Brian.  No one should have that kind of hostility coming from a parent.  I knew she wasn’t a pleasant woman but I had no idea the depth of….” He wasn’t sure how to even finish the sentence so he changed the subject.  “Gus is such a wonderful little boy.  I take it he doesn’t know that Joan is your mother?”

“No.  We didn’t want him to be hurt by her.  He has talked to her a couple times but you can tell what a gentle soul he has,” Justin drifted off thinking about their son.

“You are doing an amazing job.  I know Gus is your biological son, Brian, but may I ask about Aaron? Is he your son?”

“Both of the boys are our sons,” Brian said a little sharply.

“Bri, he didn’t mean it that way.  He can tell that they are both our boys. I am sure you know my whole story.  My father had a relationship with a lovely woman and Aaron is the result of that.  She knew she was not in a place to be a mother and I couldn’t see family going to strangers. I legally adopted him.  Of course, they wouldn’t put Brian’s name on the birth certificate, too, but he has legal guardianship as well as I do.”

Tom sipped his wine and watched the fire. “I love my job and most of my parish,” he smiled a bit, “but I sometimes wish I had this.”

Brian kissed Justin’s hair and said, “Tom, you’re welcome anytime you need a little ‘family’ time. I don’t know what I would do without all of them, including Ronni and Tracy.”

“Well, gentlemen, I better go before I have another glass of wine and have to stay. I will be in touch if I learn anything from either Joan or about Kevin.”

“Thanks for everything, Tom,” Justin gave him a hug.

Brian stepped up to him and was surprised when he hugged him instinctively.  “Tom, do you have plans for Thanksgiving?”

“I have had a few invitations.”

“Well, you are welcome here if you would like to come.  It is obvious Gus would like to see you again. You don’t have to answer now.  As Gus said, we always have plenty of food for one more.”

Tom paused for a moment and then said, “I’d like that.  I feel like I can be me here.”

“Great!  I’ll be in touch once we have a time locked down.”

They said goodbye and Brian and Justin went upstairs.  After checking on the boys they got ready for bed.  Justin came out of the bathroom and saw Brian staring out the window toward the small house his mother was in. 

Justin got in bed and softly said, “Brian, come to bed.”

Brian walked over to the bed and got in next to him. “Justin, can we not talk tonight.  I just don’t want to talk.”

“I can think of other ways to communicate.” Justin stretched over Brian’s chest and their lips met. Justin began working his way down Brian’s body and as he did he could feel Brian ‘s body begin to respond and forget about outside distractions.  As Justin’s mouth slipped over Brian’s cock, Brian audibly sighed and his body arched so Justin could take more of him in but Justin began to toy with him until he begged for release.  Justin took him all the way into his mouth and as the warm liquid rushed down Justin’s throat, Brian shouted and then relaxed as Justin coaxed every drop out of him.

As they lay there a little later, they talked softly about everything that had happened throughout the day.

“I will be glad when that Len is done.  I don’t know what it is about him but I just don’t feel comfortable with him around. He has a fixation on you.  He kept bringing you up.”

“Well, we can hire someone else.  There have to be others out there that could do the job.” Brian pulled him close.

“He has everything he needs and he is going to start tomorrow.  By the end of the week he should be done.  By mid week next week she will be out of here, right?”

“Yes, I told Claire she needs to pick her up next Wednesday.  She will be out of here the day before Thanksgiving.” Brian’s hand moved down Justin’s body and his fingers began to slide between his well formed ass.

“Well, that is definitely something to be thankful for!” As Brian said this he found the spot he was seeking and his finger slipped in and soon it was Justin’s turn to feel the pleasure only Brian could give him.

James received Len’s text that he would be at the house in 40 minutes. He walked up behind Emmet who was brushing his teeth and wrapped his muscular, ebony arms around him and held him tightly against his impressive chest. “I wish I had more time,” he kissed Emmet’s neck and onto his shoulder, “for this right now but I need to get ready.  Len is on his way.”

“Damn, I don’t like that guy.  There is something about his aura that just doesn’t feel right.” James kept running his mouth below Em’s ear. “Hell, you make it hard to think.”  He could feel James erection pressing against him.He set his toothbrush down, turned to face James, and after a quick kiss he went down on his knees, taking the towel wrapped around James’ waist with him. He opened his mouth and took him deep in his throat. 

As Emmett’s mouth and tongue began to work, James leaned over to support himself on the sink as his knees felt like they might give out. Emmett and James soon were in a rhythm and then James lost control.

“Emmett, you are the most amazing…” Emmett stood and kissed him.

“As I was saying, I don’t like that Len and the sooner he is out of here the better.”

“I don’t think he is a threat to anyone but there is something about him. Well by the end of the day tomorrow at the latest he should be done and I will make up some excuse in the spring why we can’t hire him.” He kissed Emmett once more, “Emmett Honeycutt, I love you.”

“Oh, Jamesy.  I love you, too.”

An hour later James stood in the studio with Len.  “Jim, you don’t have to be here.  I will need help placing the unit later but that won’t be until the end of the day.  Just leave me.  I will call you if I need a hand.  I am sure you have other things to take care of on this estate.”

“Well, ok.  I will stop by from time to time and give me a call if you need an extra set of hands or have a question.”

Once James had left Len alone, he got busy. He went through the supplies.  He watched Ronni leave. He wondered how many people were actually on the property. He had hoped to get a glimpse of Brian.  That man was still as hot as he had been five years ago. There was a time he thought he might actually have a chance with him.  Brian had always looked for him in the back room but he had to accept the fact that he fell for the little blonde.

Justin popped in around lunch.  “How’s it going? Ronni won’t let anyone go hungry here so I brought some lunch for you.”

“Just set it down,” he said dismissively.

“So how’s this system going to work? Will there be a switch? Or will it be a remote?” No answer. Now Justin was irritated.  “Excuse me, but I’m asking you something and since you are working for me…”

“And you will rub that in!” Len then caught himself.  “I apologize.  I had a fight with my boyfriend this morning,” he lied.  “I have just been stewing over it all morning.” He then went on and explained it would be a remote operated system that would work like anything else run with a remote. As he continued to work he said, “It will have a low and a high setting.  I would suggest you always have it run low but if you are using something with more chemicals you can put it on high.” He then looked at Justin. “Do you work up here a  lot?”

“Lately not as much as normal.  With a baby and Brian’s mother here, there just is always something to do.”

“Brian’s mother?”

“Long story.  She has had some health issues.  She will be leaving next week. We can’t wait to have her off the property.”

“Is that both of you or just you?”

“No, Brian doesn’t speak to his mother more than a couple times a year. Brian’s stress level will be cut in half once she is out of here.” Now Justin shivered.  He wasn’t sure why but he was liking Len less and less. “Well, I better go.  Ronni will need to go pick up Gus in a couple minutes.  You can either leave the dishes here or drop them in the kitchen,” and Justin made his escape.

Brian put in a long day.  He had not been in the office as much as normal lately so he wasn’t expected home until late.  Sweet natured Gus was not in a good mood.  Justin and then Tracy had tried to put him in a better mood but Justin finally sent him to his room. Then to top off his night, Joan messaged that she needed someone to help with something in the pool house. 

Tracy volunteered to go see what she needed but Justin said, “I’ll check it out.  I get the feeling this is something with the actual house.  Aaron is asleep and, well, you know Gus’ mood.”

“I’ll see if he wants me to read him a book.  Maybe that will make him happy.” 

As Justin slipped on his jacket, he saw the stack of pictures he had just printed out.  He picked one of his favorites and took it with him.

“What can I do for you, Joan?”

“My son isn’t responding.  I guess he is still upset with me,” Joan commented.

“He is still at the office.”

“Looks like he takes advantage of your kinder nature.”

Justin took a deep breath, “You said something about the sink?”

“Yes, the drain is very slow.”

He laid the picture of the boys on her small table and then took care of the sink. When he came back into the living room and saw Joan looking at the picture.  “Since you are going to be leaving soon, I thought you might enjoy having a picture of your other grandsons.” Justin looked around the room and noticed most of the therapy equipment was no longer there. “This place seems to be a good place to heal.  When I got here I couldn’t speak well or move smoothly either.” Justin noticed Joan looking at the picture. “Does Gus look like Brian? I have never seen any baby pictures of him.”

“I don’t remember what he looked like.” She said bluntly.

“Well, I better go. Gus wasn’t happy tonight.”

“Now that sounds like his father,” Joan blurted out.

“The truth is he misses his father.  If Brian was a fussy child maybe it was because he missed his father’s and mother’s love.” With that said, Justin left the pool house.  As he walked toward the door he glanced up and saw that a hole had been cut in the wall of his studio and the ventilation unit had been put in.  From here, even in the dark he could see that some trim would need to be done before it was complete.  Once Len had left Justin had checked inside and from what he could see, it looked like Len had done a good job so far.

When Justin got back in the house he went up to Gus’ room where Tracy sat in an overstuffed chair with Gus on her lap but he still wasn’t happy. “Daddy J, where did you go?” he sniffled. Justin picked him up off of Tracy’s lap and he clung to Justin’s neck.

“I don’t think he is feeling well,” Tracy commented.  “I asked him if something hurt but he wasn’t sure.”

“I’ve got him.  Thanks for your help.”

“If you need anything I will be practicing a couple things in the kitchen.”

“Thanks.” Justin turned his focus on Gus.  He placed his forehead on Gus’ and could feel it was warm.

“Where’s Daddy? I want my daddy.”

“Let’s look at my phone and see when he will be home.” Justin looked and saw what time Brian had left the office and he should be pulling in any time. “Your daddy should be here very soon.  Let me tell him where we are.” Just quickly texted him and said Gus wasn’t feeling well.  In a few minutes Justin heard Brian’s car and then they just waited.

When Brian walked into his bedroom, Gus instantly moved off of Justin’s lap and rushed into his daddy’s arms. “Hey, Gussy, I hear you aren’t feeling well.”

“Oh, Daddy, I missed you.  Where were you? You are always here for dinner.”

“I am so sorry. Daddy had to work late tonight but I promise not to do that often.” Brian sat down with Gus and Justin could see the little boy relax and after having him take something for his fever Brian laid with him in bed until he was asleep. 

Brian went to look for Justin.  He found him in the kitchen where he had warmed up a plate of food for him and a glass of whiskey. Brian put his arms around Justin.  “Bad day?”

“I just hate seeing Gus like that and then Joan…”

“She didn’t give you any trouble did she?”

“No, I was just glad Tracy was here to stay with Gus, and Len was here all day and…” Justin took a deep breath, “I’m sorry, you worked hard all day. You don’t need this.”

“I need all of this.  We share all of this,” Brian said as Justin pointed to the seat and brought the food and drink to him and then sat next to him with his own glass of amber liquid.

While Brian ate, Justin told him about the day.  He told him about his encounter with Len but that he had made good progress and he told him about giving a picture of the boys to Joan.  “I don’t know how she can’t look at those sweet faces and feel something.”

“You are too kind sometimes.” Brian kissed him.  “I promise I won’t be late again until after the first of the year.”

“Bri, you can’t promise that but thank you.  I know you don’t like to be late.”

“Do you have any idea what is up with Gus? Was he complaining about anything?”

“No, he was just not his cheery self.  Maybe he is getting a cold. Little boys have off days.  If his fever is higher tomorrow I will call the doctor. He wasn’t happy with me today.  He only wanted you.” 

Brian could see this bothered Justin a little bit.  “You know how much he loves his Daddy J.”

“I do know that.  It just made me feel a little helpless.”

I told them I would be in late tomorrow. If Gus is still fussy, I have to run in for a bit but I will be home most of the day.  Right now, I would love to share a bath with you.”

“That sounds like just what I need.” Justin responded and kissed Brian. Brian put his dishes in the dishwasher and arm in arm, they went upstairs together.  As they sat in the steaming water the tensions of the day drifted away. 

“I am keeping Gus home tomorrow, no matter what. By tomorrow night I think the ventilation system will be in place and Len will be gone.”

“And a week from today is Thanksgiving and I will be thankful that she will be half an hour away. That is something to definitely be thankful for.  Let’s try to get together with Ronni, Emmett, and Tracy together tomorrow and get the Thanksgiving party planned.  We have everyone invited but we haven’t given them details yet.” Brian’s hands slid over Justin’s water slicked body.

Justin sighed, “I think that is a great idea.”

“I think I will go in early and be back by lunch.  You can tell Gus I will be with him all afternoon.”

“Brian, you are such an amazing dad.  You have to know that.”

“That is the nicest thing you could ever say,” Brian whispered as his hand turned Justin’s head for a kiss.

Chapter 9

Gus woke up with a very stuffy nose and a cough.  Ronni immediately prepared a honey and lemon drink for him along with some magic herbs.  The honey made it sweet enough for Gus to drink and then he curled up on the sofa with his favorite blanket and watched cartoons until he drifted off. Justin was glad to see James was planning on spending the morning helping Len.  With Brian at work, he liked having someone available to watch him. 

By noon, Brian was back home.  He took Gus upstairs and laid down with him.  After eating lunch with Len, James let Justin know that Len was just going to finish up the trim work and painting and he would be out of there.  At 3:00 they had their Thanksgiving planning meeting.  Tracy had snacks for them and Gus, though looking much more subdued than usual, snuggled on Brian’s lap wrapped in his blanket. Justin’s heart could barely handle the tenderness Brian was showing him.  Aaron was down for a nap so they thought they could talk uninterrupted but just as they started, Len silently appeared.

“Oh, Brian, I didn’t know you were home.” Len commented. “If you would like to see the final product…”

“Justin is in charge of this product.  Anyway, I have more important things to do right now.  My son isn’t feeling well.”

“Ronni, can you get out the household checkbook while I take a quick look.  James knows how much we owe him.”  With that Justin followed Len back up to his studio.  He was impressed.  The installation and cosmetic work around it looked great.  “This looks like a great job, Len.  Thanks.  Do I need to know anything special about the remote?”

“No, I am sure you can figure it out.” They walked back down together and then, before entering the house, Len said, “Oh, the first couple times you use it, there might be a bit of an odor.  You  know how it is with new electrical stuff.  You have to blow away that factor smell.”

“I won’t panic if I smell anything. Let’s get your check and you can be on your way.” Justin said with a smile.

“You seem to be in a hurry to get rid of me.” Len said softly with a threatening undertone to his words.

“Not at all. I just couldn’t see you excited about hanging around now that you have finished the project. I’m sure you are busy with your other job.

“Not so much.  Nothing I can’t deal with. No one seems to realize what I am all capable of but their loss.” With that he entered the house to retrieve his check and then with a nod he left without a word.

Both Emmett and Justin let out a sigh of relief.  “He did a good job?”

“It all looks great and he showed me how to use the remote but James,” Justin said, “don’t hire him again.  I don’t know what it is about him but I don’t trust him.”

“Honey, I totally agree.” Emmett added. “He has a creep factor of 1000. I don’t remember him being like that when he was younger.”

“Well, you have your ventilation system and he has a little cash and now we have a holiday to plan.” Brian stood and laid a now sleeping Gus on the sofa before returning to the table.  

“We are looking at around 20 people, right?” Ronni questioned.

“Well, Mom and Molly and maybe her boyfriend.” Justin stated.

“And Ted and Blake,” Brian added.

“Father Tom.”

Emmett held up his hand, “Wait!  Did you say Father Tom is coming for Thanksgiving?”

“Yes, Em.  He is helping us get Joan ready to move home.” Justin and Brian had decided to play down his paternity until they had real answers.

“As long as Joan the crone isn’t coming.”

“Emmett, you don’t have to worry about that.  I would never have her near the boys that long.” Brian glanced at the sofa to make sure Gus was still sleeping.  “Someday I will tell Gus about the woman who gave birth to me but he will never be exposed to her for any amount of time.”

They covered the remainder of the people coming.  Veronica had a couple friends coming as well as the mystery boyfriend and Tracy had invited a couple of people in her classes that had no place else to go bringing the total between 18 and 20. They decided the meal would be about 1:30 and then people could stay into the evening if they chose to. If it was a nice day they expected to use the hot tub and no matter what they planned to just have a relaxing day.

They spent the next half hour planning the menu and Emmett had said he would take care of snack foods people might like to eat later in the day as the evening went on while Tracy, with the help of Ronni were going to make the turkey and everything else you could imagine to go along with it. 

By the time Emmett and James walked out hand and hand, Brian had Aaron and Gus while Justin went back to send an email with the details they decided on to all their guests. The evening went on quietly.  They had decided Gus would just stay home the next day, Friday. The preschool was closed all next week so that should give Gus lots of time to get over his cold.  

Saturday was very relaxed.  Gus was still under the weather but was satisfied to watch a movie as long as one of the adults was nearby.  Brian heard from Claire and she would come on Sunday to move their mother back home.  That was the best news they all could hear. 

When Gus overheard their conversation he said, “Daddies, can I go say goodbye?”

“Oh, Gus, you are such a sweet boy but since you have a cold it is probably best if you don’t go see her.  You could draw her a picture. Then one of us can bring it out to her before she leaves tomorrow.” Justin tried to redirect  him, not wanting him to talk with her again.

“Ok,” Gus took a deep breath and then coughed a little. “When I saw her she just didn’t seem happy.  I will draw her some flowers.  Flowers make everyone happy.”

“She better love that,” Brian said under his breath.  Brian looked over at Justin and he saw a look in his eye, “Sunshine, go up to your studio for a couple hours.  I can tell you need a little time alone.”

“But it is Saturday.  It’s family day.”

“None of us are going to be slighted if you take a couple hours.”

“I can take Aaron up with me.  He would just sleep.”

“If he is just going to sleep, let him sleep.  If I need help, Tracy and Ronni are around here, too. Now, go!”

“I love you, Brian.” Justin kissed him. He then smiled down at Gus whose head was in his daddy’s lap.  “I love you, too, my Gus.”

“I love you, Daddy J.” 

Justin took the steps two at a time.  He hadn’t realized how much he missed working on a project but life had been too crazy lately to take the time.  He wanted to start thinking about projects for the hospital. He spent an hour with a sketch pad and then he pulled out some paint.  Talking to himself, he said, “I have the ventilation system now, I should use it.”  He pressed the power button on the remote and the system kicked on. Justin pulled out his paints and a canvas. He divided it into several sections.  He decided he would put different techniques in each square.  Damn, Len wasn’t kidding.  It really smelled in here but it didn’t smell the way he expected.  He wasn’t sure what it smelled like but it wasn’t pleasant. He felt a headache coming on and then looked at the clock.  It was time to go see what was in the kitchen for dinner anyway.  He turned the fan off before heading down the steps to the house. He had hoped he was over these horrible headaches. 

“Hey Sunshine, are you alright? You don’t look so good.”

“I’m not sure if it was the smell of the new ventilation system or just happened but I am getting one of my headaches.  I’m going to drink a cup of Ronni’s miracle tea and then I will make dinner.”

“I thought the system was supposed to make it better, not worse.”

“He warned me the first couple times I used it there would be a smell.  You know a lot of new electronics have that smell.  This is just worse.  I am starting to wonder if he got it off the back of a truck.  He looked sneaky the whole time he was here.” Justin made his tea and once he had finished it the headache had gone away. Since Gus wasn’t feeling 100% he pulled out some homemade chicken noodle soup Tracy had made and made garlic bread to go with it. 

As the smell wafted through the kitchen Brian came up behind Justin and wrapped his arms around his shoulders, “Damn, you are so frickin’ sexy.  I hope the boys sleep well tonight. We have some celebrating to do.  As Em says, Joan the crone will be leaving us.”

As Justin dished up the soup Brian got the boys to the table. It was a subdued dinner with Gus on the quiet side.  Aaron kept a running chatter going when he didn’t have food in his mouth which eventually got them all laughing. After dinner Brian took Gus upstairs and put him in the big bathtub in his and Justin’s bathroom. After they put some herbs in the water that Ronni put together for them, Gus relaxed and his stuffy nose cleared up some.

“Daddy?” Gus looked at Brian.

“Yes, son?”

“The lady in the little house, are we related to her?”

Brian hesitated, not wanting to lie to him.  “Why do you ask that, Gus?”

“I wasn’t trying to listen but I heard Uncle Em and Ronni talking.  They said she is your mama.”

“Well, Gus, I wouldn’t call her my mama but yes, she is my mother.” Brian saw the confused look on his face. “It is hard to understand but remember when you said she wasn’t very happy?” Gus nodded.  “Well, she wasn’t very happy when I was your age either. She just wasn’t the kind of person that gave hugs and kisses.”

“She never gave you hugs or kisses?” Gus looked up at Brian.  

Brian swallowed hard, “I guess….” he thought for a moment, “No, she never did.”

“Not even when you got hurt or had a bad dream?”  Neither Brian or Gus saw Justin walk into the bathroom.

“No, I don’t think she did,” Brian said softly.

“I’m sorry, Daddy.  Mommies and Daddies should always give hugs and kisses.” Gus went silent for a moment and then he looked up at Brian’s face. Brian’s face had gone somber as he thought about his own childhood. Gus carefully stood up and then without restraint, threw his arms around Brian’s neck. “I am always here to give you a hug and a kiss.”

Justin saw the tears begin to run down Brian’s face.  Brian hugged his son hard as the tears dripped from his face to Gus’ wet body. Justin walked over and picking up a towel wrapped it around Gus, taking him from Brian. “Let’s get you ready for bed, son.” Justin took a moment to put his hand on Brian’s cheek and with his thumb wiped away the tears and mouthed, ‘I love you’. 

Justin helped Gus into his pajamas and then into bed. “Daddy J. did you know that Daddy never got hugs and kisses?”

“I did.”

“I know Grandma Jenn gives good hugs and kisses.”

Justin smiled, “Yes, she does. I always knew she loved me.”

“Why was that lady so mean to Daddy.  Moms are supposed to take care of their kids.”

“Yes, they are, Gus.” Justin kissed Gus and hugged him. “You need to get some sleep, Gus.”

“Daddy J., will you take care of Daddy? I think he needs someone to take care of him.”

“As soon as you fall asleep I will take care of him.”

“I can fall asleep by myself. Goodnight.” 

“Goodnight, Gus. We both love you so much.”

“I know that.  You always give me hugs.”

Justin turned on the night light and turned off the light as he pulled the door shut. He was worried about Brian.  He rushed back to their bedroom.  Brian sat on the edge of the bed with his head in his hands. Justin sat down next to him and wrapped his arms around Brian.  Brian turned into the embrace and wept. It was several minutes before Brian pulled himself together. “Damn, that kid just got to me.  How did I ever get a kid that sweet?”

“I am guessing he takes after his father who takes after his father.” Justin took his shirt sleeve and wiped Brian’s cheeks and then kissed each cheek. He then tugged at Brian’s shirt and pulled it off over his head. Justin ran his hands up Brian’s chest and then his mouth grazed several spots before Brian pulled Justin’s shirt off. Soon they were both naked and Justin had Brian lay on his stomach and then with great restraint, Justin began massaging first his shoulders and then began working his way down Brian’s spine.  As his hands moved lower he also left a trail of kisses and as he got to Brian’s lower back he placed a kiss at the base of his spine and then his tongue continued its path until he had worked it down to the one spot that Justin first slipped his tongue in but then replaced it with his finger and as he began to stroke Brian’s prostate, Brian sighed as his body tensed and then an uncontrollable shiver ran through him.

Justin moved and laid on top of Brian’s back and linked his hands with Brian’s.  He placed his mouth next to Brian’s ear and softly said, “You will never be without love.  There will always be at least three of us who will always be here to give you hugs and kisses.”

Brian moved and Justin laid on his back on the mattress.  Brian positioned Justin’s ankles on his shoulders and as he moved into position and then entered Justin he began to move slowly, in and out. Brian began to speak as he moved in and out. “I didn’t know what love was until you came into my life and showed me.” With that, Brian drove in one last time and they both climaxed and then Brian dropped onto him positioning himself with his head on Justin’s chest and then he just said, “Will you hug me? Just hug me?”

“I will hug you the rest of your life.” Justin held him tight and soon they both drifted off to sleep.

Sunday morning, Gus felt a bit better and immediately started working on his picture for the woman he now knew was his grandmother.  When he finished he went to play with his cars and Brian and Justin looked at the picture. The picture included a small yellow hair figure, a little bigger dark haired figure, and then figures that had to be Brian and Justin.  It was obvious it was a picture of the family.

Brian softly said, “Do we give it to her? She will probably just throw it away.”

“I’ll go bring it to her.  I don’t want him to see her toss it if she does. Tracy is out there helping her pack up right now so maybe she will be a little tolerable.” Before leaving Justin hugged Brian tightly and whispered, “I’ll always be here to hug you.”

Brian hugged him possessively.  “Damn, I am so lucky. I maybe put up with her for 16 years but I get to have you for 60.” Before he let him go he kissed Justin.  “Hurry back.  I was thinking we could go out for lunch so we aren’t here when she leaves and then I insist you take time to work in your studio.  I already talked to Tracy and she is available if I need her so you should have a nice chunk of time up there.”

“I love you, Brian Kinney.” Justin kissed him once more and was out the door.

Justin didn’t rush to the pool house.  He took a couple deep breaths of the crisp air.  He was working out what he was going to say because he needed to take one more shot at getting information from her. He would do anything to find the answers for Brian.

Justin knocked but when he didn’t hear a response he entered the pool house. Joan walked out of the bedroom, “Oh, thought it would be Claire.”

“I have something for you.  Gus wanted to make you a going away gift.”

“A gift?”

“He drew you a picture,” he said as he handed it to her.  He had folded it in half and placed a picture he had printed off of Brian and the boys along with it. She actually looked at it longer than he expected her to.”

“I suppose you are going to ask about Kevin again.”

“Joan, Brian just wants to know about his biological father.  Does he have health issues we should worry about?  If not for him, Gus should be able to know who his grandfather is.  Brian looks like him, doesn’t he? Anna Claire called him Kevin more than once.  I am not making any judgements.  I just know the feelings I have for my boys and I want everything possible for them and with Gus part of that is knowing who he is actually related to.”

“I don’t think…”

“I don’t believe that.  I think you ‘think’ about your past all the time and from what I can tell, your eternal soul is also important to you and, although I wasn’t raised Catholic, I am fairly sure you need to confess your sins to know you’ll go to heaven.   Maybe you should call about a confession.”

Justin moved to the door and as he turned the knob he glanced at her once more. “You never know when another stroke might come.”

“STOP!” Joan shouted.  Tracy came out of the bedroom to check on both of them. Joan continued, “You make a good match for him. He always thought he could pull the wool over someone’s eyes but he can’t do that with you.”

“He doesn’t have to.  He just tells me the truth in the first place. I won’t judge him for his decision.” She glared at him and Justin continued in a softer tone.  “Joan, he is your flesh and blood.  He may have been unexpected but you have an obligation…”

“I have no idea where Kevin Taylor ended up.  If he is still alive, he is likely still giving communion.” She looked carefully at Justin and took another breath, “Brian is a lot like him.  Everything he did seemed to thrive.  Brian was probably the only failure he ever had.”

“Joan, he wasn’t the failure.  You were.” Justin could hardly control his impulse to run back to Brian.

Joan watched Justin walk away and then turned to Tracy, “Can you believe how he spoke to me?”

Tracy looked over at her and with no change of expression she said, “He told you the truth, whether you wanted to hear it or not.  I don’t know the whole story but Brian had absolutely nothing to do with being born.  I would say you have tried to place the blame on everyone except the one that should be blamed.  You!” With that Tracy picked up her jacket and walked to the door. “Everything is packed.  The grandsons you claim should be able to carry everything for you in a couple trips.”

When Justin walked into the house both Aaron and Gus were crying.  “Which one should I take?” 

Brian handed Aaron to him. “He fell trying to pull himself up and barely bumped his head on one of Gus’ blocks.  The fall scared him and,” he picked Gus up and held him tight, “Gus, Aaron is fine.  He just got scared.”

“But it was my toy that made him cry.”

“No, sweet boy, he was just startled in the fall.” Both men nurtured a son until both drifted off to sleep. Gus laid on the sofa and Aaron was in his play pen sound asleep.

“I think maybe today isn’t the best day to go out for lunch.  How about we heat up some of the amazing mac and cheese that Tracy made and we can have lunch up in the studio so if Claire stops by to complain it will look like we are gone,” Justin suggested to Brian.

“I think that is a great idea. I really don’t want to have to deal with either of them today.” Brian pulled Justin into his arms and together they walked to the sectional and sat on the opposite end from Gus. “You know your time is always perfect.”

“I don’t know about that but…” Justin was interrupted when Brian’s mouth came down on his. “Brian, I…” Another kiss. “But I was going…” finally Justin gave in and relaxed against Brian’s strong chest and after a few more kisses they both had dozed off.  They both hadn’t realized how much stress they had been under and just knowing Joan was leaving they could feel some of the pressure lifting.

Justin woke to Gus crawling onto his lap. “Daddy J., Baby Aaron is ok, isn’t he?”

“Oh sure he is.  Do you want to stay snuggled with Daddy or do you want to help me get lunch started?”

“My nose is snuffy. I hate that.  I talk funny.” 

Justin had stood and took Gus with him, hoping Brian would continue to sleep. “Would you like some of Ronni’s tea?”

“Not too hot.”

“Of course not.” Justin set him down on the counter dropping a kiss on the little boy’s nose.

“Daddy J, did you go see the lady?”

“I did.” Justin dropped an ice cube in the sippy cup of tea he had made and drizzled some honey in it. “This should be just right for you to drink.”

“Thank you, Daddy J. Did she like my picture?”

“Oh, how could she not like it!  You did such a good job coloring it.”

“Did she say that?”

“Oh, Gussy, you know she isn’t a happy lady but I could tell she liked it, even if she didn’t say it.”

“What’s going on over here without me?”

“I have a snuffy nose, Daddy, but Ronni’s tea is making it better.” 

Brian wrapped an arm around his son and smiled, “I’m glad.  I think your cold is getting a little better every day.  By Thanksgiving it should be all better.”

Aaron woke up and the four of them slipped upstairs just as they saw Peter walk into the pool area.  Brian had told Claire they wouldn’t be around so they hoped no one came to the door. They allowed Gus a treat and let him have a little soda with his lunch and Aaron loved eating the cheesy pasta with his hands. 

After they had eaten Brian looked at the vent that Len had put in.  “I have no idea what it is supposed to look like but he did a neat job.” Brian stopped talking as he watched his mother, who was using a walker, and his sister making  their way out of the backyard.  “At least now if the boys come up here with you I know you can turn on the ventilation system so the odors won’t affect any of you.”

“I just hope that whatever that scent was it goes away quickly.  I think if I come up later today, I will open the window and turn on the vent.  That should burn off whatever is in the system and give me fresh air at the same time but since the boys had a long morning nap they may not want to sleep for a while.  Maybe I will come up after Aaron has gone down for the night.  I can then work from 7:30 or so until whenever.

Brian received a text from Claire whining about their mother before the end of the afternoon and Brian reminded her she had been staying with them almost two months and if he was helping with the bills she was in charge of the crone. The rest of the day was just spent hanging out with the boys.  

Ronni arrived at the house in time to make dinner for them.  She had spent the day with Emmett and James as well as her boyfriend but she had not brought him to the main house yet. As she worked in the kitchen Brian walked over and as she reached into the bowl of pudding to stick his finger into it, he tried to coax more information out of her but other than telling him to get out of her food, she was tight lipped.

Justin smiled over at the two of them, “Ronni, you are allowed to have your secrets but please promise you won’t leave us without giving us a head’s up.”

“Justin, even if this man and I, well, come to an agreement, I will not be giving up my job.  But I promise, we are not at that point just yet.”

“Well, you know he is welcome to, um, have breakfast here, too.” Justin glanced at the always alert Gus.

“Thank you, Justin.  In case we end up here, for breakfast, I will let him know he is welcome.”

After the meal, Justin made sure Aaron was settled in for the evening and Gus sat on Brian’s lap getting a story read to him as he drifted in and out of sleep.  Justin dropped a kiss on the top of Gus’ head and then Brian’s.  He brought his mouth to Brian’s ear and said softly, “Do you want me to wake you up when I come to bed?”

“I will be leaving early for a meeting,” Brian said gently.

“I’ll try not to wake you then.” They kissed once more and Justin went up to the studio.

Justin had grabbed an old sweatshirt and put it on before he opened the window and then turned on the ventilation.  Justin got out a large canvas and oil paints. Ever since seeing Brian so broken yesterday he felt there was a painting he just needed to produce. He planned to leave facial details out because Brian felt like a nobody so he would leave that as a blur.  Justin couldn’t believe he could still smell that unit but with the window open it wasn’t bad and at some point it got just too cold to keep the window open.  Justin shut it and went back to his work.  

Sometime later he wasn’t sure what time it was. He was surprised the painting had come along so far but it wasn’t the first time he lost track of time while he painted but then he realized his head was pounding and when he tried to stand he fell to the floor.  Why was he so dizzy? What time was it? He should get to Brian.  He….  Justin lost his fight to stay continuous.

Brian reached for Justin but he wasn’t there.  He looked at the clock and saw it was 2:12 a.m.  He laid there for a while, wanting Justin to come to bed. He wanted him right now. As he lay there he realized he never had heard what his mother had said to Justin. He tried calling Justin but he didn’t answer which meant one of two things, Justin had gone to sleep on the sofa up there or he was in the middle of a painting and he was in his own little world. When he was still awake at 3:00 and Justin hadn’t arrived yet he got up and slipped on his robe.  He went down the stairs and then up above the garage.  He decided as he walked he would see if it was possible to put a connector in somehow between the studio and the house so there wouldn’t be a need to go down and back up.

As he approached the door to the studio he could hear music playing but he also thought he smelled something. He opened the door quietly not wanting to scare him awake if he was just sleeping. He looked at the sofa first and when it was empty, he looked toward the corner and then he saw him.  Justin lay on the floor with a small trickle of blood under his head. His skin was red, far redder than a sunburn.

“Christ, Justin! Sunshine, can you hear me?” Brian smelled something.  He wasn’t sure what it was but it wasn’t the smell of something electrical.  He quickly opened a window but he couldn’t see the remote to turn off the fan. He checked Justin for a pulse and he found one but it seemed erratic. He hadn’t taken his own phone with him but Justin’s was here somewhere.  He found it and quickly first called 911 and then he called Ronni.  The next several minutes were a blur.  Ronni arrived and took charge.  She opened a couple more windows as Brian rested Justin’s head in his lap.

“Ronni, go direct the ambulance.  They will never…”

“Tracy is watching for them.  I woke her before I rushed up.  Do you know what that smell is?”  Brian didn’t hear her.

“Brian! Do you know what that smell is?”

“No, I should have checked.  He told me it smelled.  Why the hell didn’t I check?” Justin groaned. “Oh, Justin, the ambulance is on the way.  Come on, hang in there.”

“Cold,” he said softly. “So cold and my head…”

“Oh, darling,” Brian kissed him.  “Can you take a deep breath?” 

After that everything was a blur.  A police officer entered and Ronni told him about the new system and the smell. The paramedics arrived and took Justin out with Brian right behind him.  

“Boys, who will watch the boys?” Justin managed to say just as they pushed him out of the house.

“Tracy and Ronni will take care of the boys.  Don’t worry about them.”  Brian said as he got in the back with Justin along with one of the paramedics and the other shut the doors and then drove the ambulance. Brian didn’t even notice when the lights and sirens were started.

By the time they pulled into the hospital and Justin was removed the paramedic put a hand on Brian’s arm,  “He seems strong. And his breathing has gotten stronger. You will need to stop at the desk and answer some questions.”

It was about an hour later when Brian felt a hand on his arm.  He looked up and saw Ted. “How did you…”

“Ronni called James and Emmett and Em called me. Any word?”

“No, I was about to…”

“Blake is trying to find out what is happening. Em said something about poison gas? Sounds like he and James may have been drinking last night.”

“I don’t know about the drinking but something smelled horrible up there. I don’t know what it was but I was only in there for a few minutes and I still have a headache.”

“Emmett said there were detectives there checking things out.” He looked up and saw Blake coming over.

“Well?” Brian asked.

“The nurse couldn’t tell me anything but said someone would be here within ten minutes.”

“Oh, shit, Jenn!  I didn’t call Jenn!” 

“I’ll call her,” Ted took Justin’s phone out of Brian’s hand but before he could call her, Jenn rushed over with Molly behind her. 

“Brian, what happened? What’s going on?”

Before Brian could answer Jenn, a doctor walked up.  “You are with Justin Taylor?”

“This is his mother and I’m his partner.”

“Well, Justin is  stable.  If he had been in there any longer he probably wouldn’t be alive now.”

“So he is going to be alright?”

“If he hadn’t had his head injury I would say he will be fine but there is still a slight chance that he could have some side effects but I think he will be fine in a couple days.”

“What kind of side effects?”

“Well, he has a history of headaches and seizures. Something like this could have done some damage to his already damaged brain.  We will know within 24 hours I think.”

“Do you have any idea what it was?”

“The police called us with their information but I am not allowed to say anything at this time. If the two of you would like to come with me, I’ll bring you to see him.”

Brian glanced at Ted and Ted said, “I’ll call the house.  Go be with Justin.”

With that, Brian took Jenn’s arm and Molly walked behind them as they followed a nurse into a hallway. “What happened Brian?  Emmett just called and told me to meet you here.  What happened to Justin?”

“Someone tried to kill him!” was all he said before they were shown behind a curtain, where Justin lay on an exam table.

Molly and Jenn went to one side while Brian went to the other side but he didn’t say anything.  He just took Justin’s hand with one hand and brushed Justin’s hair off his forehead with the other.

Jenn bent down and kissed his cheek. “Oh, Justin, what happened?  Brian said someone tried to kill you.”

“Mom, I’m alright.  Brian found me and got help right away.”

“Justin, do you have a fever? Your face is all red.”  Molly said as she stood next to her mom. 

Justin reached out to her and she gave him a hug the best she could.  He had an IV in one arm but with the other he hugged her tight. “Molly, I’m fine.  Don’t look so worried. The skin color is from some of the medication they gave me.”

“But you just said someone tried to kill you! Why would anyone want to do that?”

“Well, I’m not sure why but we know who.”

“And I’m going to kill him,” Brian said it so softly no one was sure if he actually said it.

Justin reached up and pulled on Brian’s jacket until Brian bent down.  Forehead to forehead, Justin softly said, “I love you.”

“This is my fault.  I’m not sure how, but it is. You told me there was something weird and…”

“No, it isn’t your fault.” Justin kissed him lightly and then sighed. “I have a major headache.”

A nurse walked in, “We have a room for Mr. Taylor.  If you can give us a half hour, we will get him settled and then you can spend as much time as you want with him.”

“Mom, please go on with your day.  I am fine and Brian will call you once we know when they are letting me go home.  I was hoping that would be about now.”

“Mr. Taylor, the doctor said you will need to stay at least 24 hours.  Because of your head injury, we need to keep an eye on you.”

“My head is…” Justin started to sit up but immediately dropped back down.

“You are not going anywhere, young man, until the doctor says you can,” Jenn said sternly. 

The attendants arrived and moved Justin onto a gurney.  The nurse looked at Brian, “I’ll let you know when you can come up and be with him.”

“Brian, what is going on? Who did this?”

“I think the ventilation system we had put in was sabotaged. Jenn, can you stay? I need to go back to the house.  I need to check on the boys and…”

“Of course I’ll stay but Brian, don’t do anything stupid.” Jenn looked at Molly.  “Molly, why don’t you go home with Brian.  The boys will need a distraction.”

“Molly, that actually would be really nice.  Are you willing to come along?”

“Oh, yes. I know I can’t do anything to help Justin but I can help with the boys.”

“And that will help your brother, knowing someone is giving them extra care.” Jenn hugged her daughter and then Brian. “Doing something stupid won’t help Justin.”

They walked to the waiting room and over to Ted and Blake. Brian put a hand on Molly’s shoulder and then realized, “I don’t have a car here.”

“You can take mine but the tank…”

“Brian, take mine.  It’s the company car.  Blake and I drove separately, realizing something like this might happen.  Justin is alright?”

“He should be fine.  I am running home and Jenn is staying with him until I get back.”

“Don’t worry about the office.  I will be there on time,”  Ted said and with that they all went their own way.

Molly didn’t try to talk to Brian until they were almost to the house.  “Brian?” she said tentatively.

“Yes, Molly?”

“Who tried to kill Justin? And why?”

“I think I know who but I don’t know why and I plan to find out!”

There were a couple police cars in front of the house when Molly and Brian got there. The boys were just waking so Molly went upstairs to help Ronni. Brian was going to go up to the studio but an officer stopped him. 

“You will let me pass if you know what’s good for you.”

“Sir, I don’t know who you are but I was told…”

“Let him up,” a voice came from above.  The young man stepped aside and Brian took the steps two at a time. 

James and Emmett were up there with a man in a suit and a couple of techs looked at the ventilation system which had been taken apart. “Brian Kinney, this is Detective Grey. He is investigating…. Oh, Brian, I am so sorry I brought that man into this house.”

Emmett gave Brian a look that dared him to be angry with James.  “James, it is not your fault.  How would you know the man was unstable.”

“Where does he live? I want to…”

Detective Grey interrupted, “He is in custody. We picked him up on the edge of town.”

“On the edge of what town?”

“Brian, honey, he was just a couple miles from here.  It was like he was waiting for something to happen.  He had to have seen the ambulance go past.”

“Gentlemen, let’s go downstairs so the techs can finish their work without us in the way.” Once they were in the great room, Emmett went over to the kitchen area and started a pot of coffee. James followed him like a lost puppy. “Mr. Augustin has been very helpful.  He is the reason we found the suspect so quickly.”

“Do you know what he did? How he did it?”

“I’m not going to guess without results but they definitely found a canister of some kind of aerosol in the system.”

Emmett brought coffee over to the detective and Brian. As Brian took a sip he heard small footsteps and then he saw Gus rushing toward him.  He quickly set the cup down and caught Gus as he flew into his lap. 

“Daddy, I didn’t think you would be home anymore.  I thought you would be on your way to work.  My cold is getting better.  I’m just a little snuffy this morning.”

“I’m so glad to hear that, Gus.”

“Where’s Daddy J.?” Gus started looking around.

“Gus, this is Detective Grey.” Brian said and Gus instantly got shy.  He tucked his head under Brian’s arm.  He was about to apologize to Detective Grey but the smile on his face let him know he understood.

“Gus, why don’t I help you get you some breakfast,” Molly walked over and picked him up off of Brian’s lap.

“Daddy, you didn’t tell me Aunt Molly was coming today.” Gus said over Molly’s shoulder as she walked away.  At the same moment Ronni walked over and dropped Aaron into Brian’s lap.

“You have a busy household.” 

Brian responded to the detective, “The big one is Gus and this is Aaron.”

“Gus is definitely yours. Does this one favor Justin?”

“Yes, both our boys are biologically related to us.” Brian held onto Aaron a little too tightly and he started to squirm and out of somewhere arms came down and Aaron was swept away for breakfast. “I have a lot of great help obviously.”

“I can see that. Mr. Kinney, is there someplace a little less, um, active to talk.”

Brian stood and, picking up his cup of coffee and the carafe with more in it he walked toward his office.  The detective followed him.

Once they had both settled into a chair on either side of Brian’s desk the detective continued, “Do you know this Len? Do you have any idea why he would have done this?”

“Grey, I have a history.”

“I don’t expect you to remember me but we have met before.  I did some investigation on Justin’s case and was in charge of digging into your history so I know your history.  This Len was one of….”

“He was one of my fuck boys, not that I knew him well.  We probably hooked up in the backroom a few times and I think he came home with me once but that never happened more than that.  Justin was about the only one that came home more than once. I don’t want to be rude but I am going to need to get back to the hospital pretty soon and I am going to have to tell Gus something.”

“I understand Justin will be alright.”

“Unless he isn’t. What is normal for most isn’t for him anymore, not after his head injury. If all is good for 24 hours he should be alright.”

“I’ll let you go.  I have your number from your friends and I will be in touch soon.”

“What can he be charged with? He tried to kill Justin.”

“Brian, I can’t say anything yet and findings will be passed on to the district attorney if it comes to that.”  He saw the tenseness on Brian’s face and stated, “You will have to trust us.  I promise to make sure everything is looked at. Justin deserves that.  I can see the two of you have a beautiful life here and you have both been through enough.”

By the time Brian had taken a quick shower and came downstairs, he knew he had to talk to Gus before he left but as he entered the great room, Gus ran up to him, “Daddy, are you going to go see Daddy J.? Aunt Molly said Daddy had a bad headache but he would be back tomorrow.”

Brian smiled at Molly, “Yes, I am going to go spend the day with him.  Is that alright with you?”

“Sure, I will help with Aaron.  Give Daddy J a big hug from me.  I know you’ll give him a kiss. You kiss him a lot.”

“I will try to be back in time to tuck you into bed tonight, alright?”

“Ok, but I understand if you need to stay later.”

As Brian drove away he had mixed emotions.  He hated leaving the boys but it was obvious they were well taken care of and he needed to see that Justin was alright.  He wasn’t sure why but he felt like he needed to get back there.  He was about ten minutes from the hospital when Jennifer called him.

“Brian, where are you?” Although she was trying to sound natural Brian could tell something was going on.

“Jenn, what is it? I’m nearly to the hospital,” Brian floored the gas pedal.

“Justin had a seizure.”

“And?”

“They can’t get it to stop.”

Chapter 10 

“Get the hell out of my way! I need to see my husband!”  A guard appeared out of nowhere and tried to stop Brian and if it hadn’t been for a nurse recognizing him, he may have been taken down to the ground.

“Joe, he’s good.  Mr. Kinney, come with me.” Brian stepped around the guard and followed the nurse.  She didn’t say anything else but led Brian to Justin’s room. As they entered, there was another nurse in the room along with Jenn. Justin lay in the bed.  His skin had a more natural color than he had before but he was now pale and lay deathly still.

“Oh, god, Brian.” Jenn rushed over and threw herself into his arms but he went past her and just stood watching Justin’s chest.  It seemed like an eternity before Justin took a breath.  Brian than reached back and pulled Jenn into his arms. 

“How is he? The seizure stopped?”

“It stopped only because they put him into a coma of sorts.” One of the nurses stated.  

“And will he...how long will he be like this?”

“They will keep him under for a few more hours just so he can rest and then they will let him come out and hopefully not have another seizure.” Jenn said to Brian, repeating what she had been told earlier. The afternoon drug on and eventually Brian sent Jenn home.  She said she would stop by her place and then go out to Britan. “Call me if anything happens.”

“I will, Jenn.  I’ll stay with your boys if you will watch mine?”

“I love you, Brian, but more important, my son loves you.” Jenn kissed his cheek and left. 

Brian wouldn’t leave Justin’s room. The doctor came in and nodded at Brian.  After checking Justin’s vitals he looked at Brian, “You the husband?”

Brian heard an undertone of mockery in his voice. “Yes, Brian Kinney.” He was too worried about Justin to cause trouble with him. “Dr., what’s next?”

“We have been slowly taking him off the med for the last hour.”

“Will he be awake soon?”

“I can’t tell that.  Hopefully he will slowly gain consciousness and not go into another seizure.”

“So tell me the good and the bad.”

“Well, the good would be he would wake up and go home in the morning.”

“Is that really possible?”

“Anything’s possible.  Hopefully, he will wake and be well enough to leave in a day or two on seizure medication.”

“And the worst case?”

The doctor looked at Brian, “He will wake up and go back into a seizure.”

“What are his chances?”

“If he hadn’t had the head injury, he would likely be fine but he has had so much trauma. How long have you been...um, married?” he smirked a bit as he said it.

“Dr. you don’t have to agree with our way of life. In fact, you can say anything you want to me but I love this man.  We have two sons that right now are probably wondering where their daddies are.”

“You are parents? Who thought that was a good idea?”

That was all Brian could take. He took the doctor’s arm and led him out of the room.  The doctor sputtered as Brian propelled him to the nurses’ desk. He looked at the young girl, about Justin’s age, standing there. “This man is not welcome in that room again.  Justin’s neurologist will be here in the next half hour.  He will tell you who will be in charge of Justin’s case if he can’t for some reason.”  

“No one talks to me like…..”

“Well someone sure as hell should have long ago.” Brian turned around and walked back to Justin’s room.  He tried but if he had to listen to that man say one more thing…. He walked back into the room and sat down next to Justin taking his hand. He rested his head on the bed, eyes closed. He wasn’t sure how long he had been there when he heard the door open and Justin’s doctor walked in.

“Brian, how is he?”

“You’re supposed to tell me that.”

“I read over his chart. They did what I would have done, even though I may have given him a little less of the drug.  Brian, I hate to say it but we just have to wait.  We both know how strong he is.”

“He may be but I am not sure how strong I am.”

“I can stay around for a bit. Why don’t you go and get something to eat.”

“No, I couldn’t eat anything. Are you going to stay around?”

“Brian, I will give detailed instructions to the doctor on call. I know you ran into the biggest asshole on staff but all of them are good.” The doctor made notes on the chart and then went to the door. “I will stop by early tomorrow morning.”

Before Brian could sit down again, Ted walked in.  He brought Brian a sandwich and chips , along with a soda. “Ted, thanks but I’m not hungry.”

“Well, I’ll just leave it in case you are later. Do you want me to stay for a while?”

“No, Theodore, you were here at 4:00 a.m. and kept my business going all day.  Go home to Blake.  Screw his brains out and tell him you love him more with every breath.  Marry that man and don’t ever doubt that a relationship is worth every ounce of blood, sweat, and tears you put into it.”

Ted put his arms around Brian, and Brian hugged him tightly for a few moments. “Brian, are you sure you don’t want me…”

“Go, Ted.  Justin will wake up.  I know he will.”

“I know he will, Brian.  He has too much to live for.” Ted kissed Brian’s cheek and then, after kissing Justin on the forehead he left them alone.

Brian ate a couple bites of the sandwich and then called to the house and talked to Jenn and apologized to Gus for not tucking him in.  “That’s Ok, Daddy.  Can I say good night to Daddy J?”

“He is sleeping, Gus….but wait a minute….” Brian walked over and held the phone near Justin’s ear, “Ok, Gus, he can hear you.”

“Daddy J, I know you are sick but I love you. Come home soon.”

“Goodnight, Gus, will you give Aaron a hug and kiss for me?”

“I will, Daddy.  I love you.”

“I love you, too, Gus.  I will see you tomorrow.”  After Brian used the bathroom, he slipped into bed next to Justin and pulled the blanket over both of them before resting his arm around Justin’s waist and fell asleep.

Brian began to dream. He was on the dance floor at Babylon.  He was in the middle, surrounded by beautiful men. He was looking for Justin and then remembered Justin was gone.  He had died but he couldn’t have. ‘Brian, let’s go to the back room.’ It was Len. ‘I’ll help you relax.  I promise you will feel better.’ Len had gently stroked Brian’s crotch and Brian took him to the back room. 

The dream went on or was it a memory. Len was on his knees in front of Brian and he had his cock in his mouth.  ‘Damn, boy, you are pretty good at that,’ Brian said to him. ‘If you want to do that for me again, come by my place tomorrow night.’ 

Then he was laying in his bed. Len was naked on his hands and knees and Brian was riding him hard.  All he wanted was Justin, not this guy. This Len guy wasn’t in the same league as Justin but Justin was dead. He would never be with Justin again. He would never be able to put his mouth around Justin’s amazing dick again. 

Now Brian was in a room full of beds. Each one had a different guy in it but everytime he turned one over they were Len and all he wanted to do was find Justin. “Justin, where are you? Justin?”

“Brian, baby, you’re dreaming.  Wake up sweetheart.  I’m right here.  I’m not going anywhere.” Brian’s eyes fluttered open and Justin was over top of him. “There you are.  You were having a nightmare.  You were mumbling.”

“Sunshine! Oh, god, Justin! You’re awake! You’re alive.  I was dreaming...I…. how are you? I need to get the doctor. Oh, god…” Brian kissed him “How are you?”

“Kiss me again and I’ll tell you.” Justin said. Brian gently made him lay down and this time kissed him gently, feeling the inside of his mouth with his tongue.

“Your mouth is dry.  Let me go get a nurse and see if you’re allowed water.”

As Brian got up, Justin said,  “The boys.  Who’s with the boys?”

As he walked to the door, Brian said, “Ronni, your mom, and Molly are there.” Brian stuck his head out and whistled softly, getting a nurse’s attention. “He’s awake.” He spoke softly, not wanting to disturb anyone in the surrounding rooms. Brian walked right back so he could hold Justin’s hand.  He just needed to touch him. As he sat on the edge and bent to kiss him once more someone walked in.

“Well, Mr. Taylor, it is good to see those beautiful blue eyes.” The male introduced himself as a doctor and stated he had talked to his neurologist. “How are you feeling?”

“My mouth is very dry.” The doctor immediately picked up a glass and filled it with water, passing it to Brian so he could hold it for Justin.  Justin took a long draw from the straw. The doctor had to smile seeing the care Brian was giving to Justin.  He couldn’t stand to break contact with him.

“I bet you got an ear full from my associate.”

“I am told he is a good doctor.” Brian tried not to make his feelings clear about the previous physician.

“Oh, he is but he’s a homophobic, biggeted asshole.”  He took out a little flashlight and checked Justin’s eye reflex.  He saw Justin’s pain reflex. “I’m sorry,” he gently touched his shoulder. “It’s obvious you are in pain. Other than the headache, how do you feel?’

“I’m really tired. What happened?” Justin first looked at the doctor but then looked to Brian.  “I was in my studio and it smelled but I was getting cold and thought the odor had finally gotten better. What happened? Was it a faulty ventilator?” Brian sat down and started to lay down but stopped himself.

“Not exactly.  You were poisoned,” the doctor said. “I’m going to get something ordered for that headache. Brian, there is nothing wrong with you laying with him and maybe filling him in on the details you know.”

Brian stretched out and pulled Justin close. “Len?”

“I should have listened to you.  He nearly killed you! If one of the boys had been up there with you, it would have seriously hurt or killed them.” Brian didn’t realize how tightly he was holding him.

“Brian, um, it’s getting hard to breath.”

“Shit, I’m sorry.  I am just so mad at him.  If they hadn’t already arrested him I would have found and killed him myself!”

“They have him? Well, then there is nothing for us to worry about.” Justin couldn’t hide the strain. His head was killing him.  Brian repositioned himself and with Justin now between his legs he began to rub Justin’s temples.  He instantly melted against Brian’s chest.

That’s how the nurse found them. She added something to the IV.  “That should help almost instantly.”

“Oh, that’s good.” Justin started smiling.  “Oh, ya, that’s really good.”  Brian could feel Justin’s whole body relax.

“I’ll leave you two alone.  The doctor said he would stop by before he gets off at 8:00. We’ll bring you both some breakfast around that time, too.  Sleep is the best thing for both of you from the looks of it.” By the time she had filled Justin’s glass with water, both of them were sound asleep. 

Brian woke up just as the sun was peeking into the window. He managed to get out of bed and left the room, hoping he could find a cup of coffee somewhere.  Finding a waiting room with a coffee maker he made himself a cup and was adding a handful of sugar packets when he realized someone was beside him. “Oh, I didn't hear you,” he said as the doctor made a cup for himself. “So, was this an accidental meeting or were you looking for me?”

“I guess both.  I hoped to talk to you but I really needed this,” he held up his cup of coffee.” The doctor motioned to a couple empty chairs in the empty waiting room. 

“I am guessing you have results  from some of the tests they ran. Please tell me he will be fine. I can’t go home to my boys if he isn’t with me.”

“Brian, may I call you Brian?” Brian nodded. “I really think you found him in the knick of time. My opinion is the seizure was his fight to get rid of the rest of the gas in his system. It is obvious he has a life to live for so I don’t expect him to be going anywhere. Ok, I’m rambling. I’m tired.  The tests do not show any permanent damage besides what was there already.  As long as his headache subsides I am thinking he will get to go home before dinner tonight but I don’t have the last word. And don’t take this wrong but you look like hell.”

Brian took a long sip of the coffee.  “Have you ever found something you thought you had lost forever and then just when you think you can breathe again, you fear you are losing it again? I started to blame myself but it isn’t my fault.  He was someone I spent a night with, no strings or promises. He knew who I was and he knew it wasn’t going to be more than one night of sex.  I had thought Justin was dead and I knew I could never love someone else but I still ….”

“You don’t have to explain anything to me.  The food isn’t great here but it isn’t bad.  I told them to double Justin’s food tray so you both can find something to eat and maybe you can have someone bring you some real food for lunch.  Order Justin’s favorite.  Then you can have dinner with your sons. And my guess is by Thanksgiving, this will be just a memory. Now get back there so he doesn’t have to wonder where you are.  He is going to lose the good juice very soon and we will send him home with some painkiller for the pain.  I think in the next day or two his headache will be gone.  He may feel a bit tired. Have him drink plenty of water and I wouldn’t leave him alone with the kids.  I don’t expect him to have another seizure but it is for safety.”

“There is always someone around besides us. Oh, I need to call my boy.  He is going to be beside himself without talking to us.” Brian stood and headed back to Justin’s room and then realized he had just left the doctor sitting there.  “Oh, I’m sorry. I guess I’m not thinking.”

“You might be a bit scattered but you are thinking about what is important. You’re a good father and husband, Brian.  Go.  I have to do rounds anyway.”

Brian looked into Justin’s room and he could see he was still sleeping.  He glanced at his watch.  Gus would be up so he found a quiet corner and called the house. “Kinney-Taylor residence.” It was Tracy’s voice at the other end. 

“Hey, Tracy, is Gus awake?”

“Oh, Brian, how is Justin?”

“Hopefully he will be home by dinner.” He was fairly sure he heard Gus crying somewhere in the background.  “Let me talk to Gus.”

“Maybe he will listen to you. He isn’t happy. Gus, your dad is on the phone.”

Brian heard sniffling, “Is it Daddy J? I need to talk to him.” There was more sniffles and then a little voice. “Daddy J, is it you?”

Brian’s heart nearly broke. “Hey, Gus, your daddy J is sleeping but he is doing much better.”

“Daddy, you said you would come home last night.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, Gus.  You’re right.  I did say that.”

“How is Daddy J? Why is he in the hospital?”

“Well, he….”

“Big James was scary.  He got really mad. Ronni told Uncle Em to take him home. I want to talk to Daddy J.” Gus’ voice started wavering again.

“Oh, son, I don’t want to wake him up.  How about we call you as soon as he is awake.”

“Ok. Don’t forget.” Brian heard another voice in the background.  “Grandma wants to talk to you.”

“Brian, how is he? Please tell me he is ….”

“Jenn, he is doing well.  He is sleeping now but he will be coming home late this afternoon as long as he feels up to it.”

“Brian, has he been awake?”

‘Yes, Jenn.  He woke with a headache in the middle of the night.  We talked for a little bit and then he went back to sleep.”

“Have you slept, Brian?”

“I’m fine.  Jenn, thanks for being there for the boys. I’m sorry you have a sad one.”

“Aaron misses you both just as much. He just doesn’t know how to express it.”

“Tell Ronni we will be home for dinner.  I will let you know when I have an estimated time.”

“Brian, tell my son I love him.” Jenn’s voice caught in her throat.

“Jenn, he has never doubted that.  I’ll give him a kiss for you and then tonight you can give him one yourself.”

By the time Brian got back into the room, Justin was waking up. Brian sat in the chair next to the bed and took his hand.  His eyes opened and he smiled at Brian, making Brian’s heart flutter. “Damn, I love you.” Brian kissed him. “That was from your mother. This one is from me.” Brian took him in his arms and kissed him with much more depth. Justin’s free arm wrapped around his neck and slid his tongue into Brian’s mouth.

“God, I want you,” Justin said softly.

“The feeling is very mutual and thank god you are feeling that well. I had a cup of coffee with the doctor.  He said you can go home late this afternoon as long as you eat well and your head is feeling better. How is the headache?”

“I don’t know what they put in that IV but it did wonders.  I am feeling much better.  I think some of Ronni’s tea and I will be back as good as new.”

“Oh, that reminds me.  Are you up to talking to Gus.  He is very worried about you.”

“Poor Gus.  I am sure he is very confused.  Of course, call him.”

Brian called the house and as they got the phone to Gus, Brian handed the phone to Justin.

“Daddy J., is that you?”

“It is, sweet Gus.  How are you? I miss you so much.”

“I miss you too, Daddy J.  I miss Daddy, too.  Are you sick, Daddy?”

“Not anymore.  I will get to eat dinner with you and I promise I will read you lots of stories tomorrow.  How is your cold, sweetheart?”

“It’s lots better. Ronni or Grandma just have to wipe my nose sometimes.”

“Oh, that is so good.” An orderly brought in a tray of food.  “Gus, I have to go.  My breakfast is here.  I love you, Gussy.  I will see you later today.”

“Love you, too, Daddy.”

After eating breakfast, Justin’s neurologist arrived and reviewed the test results.  He told them there was no damage and he was good to go if he went seizure free until later afternoon. After he had left the doctor who had been in last night stopped by before leaving for the day. 

“Well, you look better.” He said, looking at Justin. 

“I feel much better.  Just a small headache and I have those all the time. Thank you for the magic medication in the middle of the night.”

“I knew it would knock you out and that is really what you needed.  So glad you’ll be home tonight.”

“So am I.  Thanksgiving is only a couple days away.”

“Yes, I almost forgot since I will be here.”

“You will be working at the hospital?”

“Well, I had to stay around and my wife and daughter went to her parents so I will probably pick up some take out for dinner.  I have to be within a half hour of the hospital in case there is a big emergency.”

Brian could see Justin’s mind working already, “Doc, you aren’t eating alone.  If you don’t mind eating with a house full of strangers, come over. We have about 20 people coming over. We will have more than enough food and the house is big.”

“Are you sure? I have to admit I wasn’t very excited about the holiday.” 

“You have our address on my records.  Come anytime between Noon and 1:00.  We plan to eat around 1:00.”

“Thank you.  That is so kind of you. I will see you Thursday.” He walked out whistling.

“Well, looks like we have one more for dinner,” Brian ran his hand through Justin’s hair.

“I have to stink. I haven’t showered in over 48 hours and I can tell my hair is disgusting.”

“You are still gorgeous.  I love you, Justin.  And I can’t smell good, either. Would you feel better if I helped you wash up a little?”

“That sounds good.”

Brian filled the little plastic tub that was in the bathroom with warm water and got a washcloth and some soap, along with a towel. Justin had taken off the pajama top and Brian gently washed his back and under his arms.  After washing his chest he rinsed the cloth and handed it to him, “You better take care of yourself under the blankets.  I’m afraid I …..”

Ten minutes later, Justin was sitting in a chair in his room, wearing a clean pair of hospital pajamas. There was a knock on the door and the detective who Brian had seen at the house walked in. He introduced himself to Justin and asked if he could talk to him for a few minutes.

“Sure, but I don’t think I will be much help. I don’t know what I could tell you that you haven’t heard from someone else.”

“I spoke to James and Emmett.  James said you were acquaintanced with our suspect?”

“I really don’t think I had met him but Brian, James, and Emmett had met him.”

“Detective, I had sex with him once, well maybe twice. He came to my apartment once. This was when I thought Justin was dead. Any idea he had of a relationship with me….”

“Yes, both James and Emmett made that clear to me.  I take it, was it James’ idea to hire him?”

“Well, yes but that’s because he is a nice guy and he was trying to help Len out,” Justin said.

“And James, how long has he worked for you?”

“Detective, I don’t know what you are insinuating but James would never do anything like that. He and his mother have been with us a little over six months but both are part of the family,” Brian assured him.

“I agree but I had to see what you said.  Our suspect tried to pull him into his plan but I didn’t believe him.”

“Has he been charged?”

“He is being held on attempted murder although I think that will be lowered.  He actually admits to everything.  He said he had done it but he had no idea it would have the effect it did.  He thought it would make you sick.  Our investigators said his experiment didn’t work correctly.  It was supposed to spray the chemical for 30 minutes and then stop.  It was supposed to do that every time he turned it on but something went wrong and it kept sending out the chemical, rather than shutting off.”

“Did he say what he thought would happen?” Brian asked.

“He said you had rejected him and he knew how much you loved Justin so the best way to get back at you was through him.  The man is totally guilty but I really think he didn’t expect you would end up here.”

“Please tell me this won’t go to court.  I have been in too many courtrooms,” Justin signed and Brian could tell he was getting tired.

“Detective, I think Justin needs to rest.”

“Yes, I’ll be leaving.  I will be in contact.  I think I have enough to give the district attorney.”

“Please let us know what’s going on.”

“I’ll be in contact.” The detective left the room. 

Without a word, Brian helped Justin back to his bed and after he was comfortable, Brian got in next to him and soon they were both sleeping.

Brian woke to someone touching his arm.  His eyes fluttered open and he found Emmett standing next to him and James by the door.  He got out of bed and followed them into the hall.  James looked horrible. “Honey, you have to tell James you don’t hate him.  He hasn’t slept since it happened. Jennifer said Justin will go home today.”

Brian smiled at James, “You are not to blame for this, James.  It was the asshole’s fault. You are just a nice guy who tried to help out a guy who was looking for work. He is in jail.  James, we’re good. I would like it if you got someone to check out that system so it is safe for Justin.”

“That’s already done, sir.”

“Oh, god, James. Do not call me sir.” Brian realized he had no idea why they were there.  “Everything at the house is alright, isn’t it?”

“Gus is very upset but, yes, everything is good.  We are getting some groceries for Ronni and she told us to bring some clothes for Justin to wear home. I have some fresh underwear and socks, along with some jeans and a shirt.” Em handed Brian a bag. 

“Oh, I hadn’t even thought about that yet.” Brian said.

Emmett noticed how weary Brian looked.  “Brian, why don’t I go with James to get groceries and then I will drop him off to drive you both home.  You look wrecked.”

“Well, thanks,” Brian said cynically but then softened, “I would appreciate that.  Thanks, both of you.”

“Brian?” Justin’s voice came from inside the room.

“You want to say hi?”

“No, we’ll see him tonight.” Em kissed Brian’s cheek and James patted his shoulder before, hand in hand, they walked away.

Brian walked in to see Justin coming out of the bathroom. “Who were you talking to?” Justin asked as he walked over and put his arms around Brian’s neck. 

Brian kissed him and held him close, “Emmett and James dropped off some clothes for you to wear home.  They didn’t think you would want to wear home what you had on when you came here.”

“Oh, that’s great.  They could have come in.”

“I told them that but they said they would see you tonight. They are on a mission from Ronni to get groceries for Thanksgiving.” 

Justin started to kiss Brian’s neck as his hand found Brian’s fly, “I want you.”

“Damn, Justin, we really should wait until we get home.”

“I am 100% sure Gus will be sleeping between us tonight.  And he is too old for us to screw while he’s in bed.” As he said it, Justin began to unzip Brian’s fly.

“Shit, just a second.” Brian broke away from Justin and he quickly moved a dresser in front of the door and then moved a chair there and clicked the locks that were on the wheels.  Justin pulled the curtain that blocked the view of the bed from the door and he was naked before Brian could take off his shirt. “God, you are so beautiful.” Justin stood by the bed and lay his chest down on it. Brian undid his pants and took Justin’s hips and began to press into him. 

“Oh, Brian,” Justin reached back and wrapped one arm around Brian’s neck and used his other hand to help him balance on the bed.  As Justin arched, Brian pressed in once more and held Justin tightly around the waist as he orgasmed deep inside him. They stood like for a few moments as they both worked at getting their breathing back to normal. “Was I right or was I right?” Justin said as he turned his head far enough that they could kiss. “I love you, Brian.”

“I love you, too, Sunshine.”  As Brian put the furniture back in place, Justin put on the clothes Emmett had gotten for him. At first glance he thought Em had maybe gone a little overboard.  A sweatshirt would have been fine but he had brought him a deep blue sweater and once he was dressed he had to smile.  He felt better now that he looked like a real person again.

“Brian, can’t we just go home? I want to get out of here.” Justin’s emotions came to the surface.  “I want to see our boys, Brian.”

“I’ll go see if I can get an ETA and James is going to drive us home so I can focus on loving you.  Actually, they think I am too tired to drive and I can’t argue with them.”

When James walked in an hour later, Justin had been given the OK to leave.  As James went to get the car pulled to the front, an orderly pushed Justin in the wheelchair and Brian, carrying the bag of his dirty clothes followed behind. 

Once settled in the backseat together, Justin leaned against Brian, who held him tightly.  He never wanted to let him go.  He had come too close to losing him again.  He could not raise those boys alone.  He had no reason to live if the man in his arms wasn’t here.

“Brian, Justin, we are almost home.  I know Gus will be so excited to see you.  I thought you would like to wake up a bit before going in.” James had watched them in the mirror as they communicated without talking. He started thinking about this last year and how much fuller his life was now. A year ago he could barely admit he was gay to his mother and now he found the man he planned to spend the rest of his life with. Maybe someday he and Em would have a couple children of their own. They had never talked about kids.  Would Em want children? He would be so good with them, although he would definitely have to be the disciplinarian.  His Em had such a sweet nature.

James pulled the car into the garage and then as Brian offered his hand to Justin, he took the bag of dirty clothes from Brian. He hung back so Brian and Justin could go into the house together. Justin and Brian walked in the great room and saw Molly on the sofa reading a book to a very sad little boy.

“Gus, look who is home,” Molly said as she kissed her nephew’s head.

“Oh, my daddies!” Gus rushed over and both Brian and Justin dropped to their knees and together they hugged and kissed him.  He turned and put a hand on each of Justin’s cheeks, looking him straight in the eyes, “Did you really ride in an ambulance?”

“I did but now I am home and I am not going anywhere, Gus. I missed you and Aaron so much.” Justin kissed the boy and held him tight. 

“Come, Daddy J. I think you need to sit down. Can I get you a cookie or some water?” Gus said in his most grown up tone.

“Why don’t you ask Ronni to make me some tea and then come sit next to me on the sofa.”

“Ok, Daddy J.” He gave Justin one more hug and then hugged Brian before running over to Ronni.  

By the time Brian and Justin got to the sofa, Molly hugged her brother. “I was so worried about you, Justin.” She hugged him even tighter. “You scared the hell out of me.”

“Don’t let Mom hear you say that?” Justin kept his arms around her.

“Did you miss me?” Brian smirked as he sat down on the other side of her and ruffled Molly’s hair as he hugged her. “He scared me too.” He hugged her a little tighter than normal. “Enough with the hugfest.” 

Gus came rushing back and sat on Molly’s lap so he could be between his dads. Justin drank his tea and when Aaron woke from a nap, Justin took him for snuggles and Gus climbed onto Brian’s lap.

The remainder of the day both boys insisted on being with their dads and by the time they were ready for bed, so were Brian and Justin. After Aaron was put down, Brian and Justin got in bed with Gus between them, just as Justin had predicted. But as soon as Gus fell asleep, Brian moved to the other side so he could sleep up against Justin but with a hand resting on Gus as well. He softly said, “We have a lot to be thankful for. God, I can’t imagine a better life. The wicked witch of the west has returned to Oz and we are in the land of the munchkins.” 

Justin leaned forward and kissed Gus’ head. “We do have two perfect munchkins.” Justin sighed as Brian pressed against him. “Brian, Are you going to look for him?”

“I don’t have a choice.  I need to but it will wait until after the holidays.  The next five weeks are always the busiest of the year.  And if he had wanted to find me, he would have contacted me long ago.”

“Do you think he knows about you?” Justin moved his ass so it pressed against Brian’s cock.

“Oooh, you play dirty!” Brian managed to move Justin’s pants down far enough that, when he slipped his own down, he managed to slide his cock between Justin’s cheeks. “Are you game?”

“Oh, yes!” He moved ever so slightly bringing one leg up giving Brian better access. Brian tried to be gentle so Justin remained silent, and once he was all the way in, he pressed himself against Justin’s body.

“If anything was possible in the next year, where would you be?” Brian whispered in Justin’s ear.

“Right here with you.  Maybe Anna Claire would be better and come visit.”

“Maybe your father could be here.  You know it is very likely she didn’t tell him about you.”

“Sunshine, do you really think so? Why would a priest want to find out he has a grown son?”

“Because a priest cares about people. He obviously loved your aunt.”

“But that woman...leaves ruined lives in her wake.”

“Brian Kinney, are you saying your life is ruined?”

“Absolutely not, but if it had been left up to her….  You and our family have saved me.  She can’t hurt me anymore.”

“She lost control of you long before I arrived on the picture.”

“No, I had gotten away but her cold clammy grip still held onto something deep inside me.  You loosened that grip and now….”

“You are safe from her. And now….” Justin started moving just the slightest amount until he and Brian both climbed to the pinnacle and then Brian held onto Justin tightly as they drifted off together.

Chapter 11 

“Are you still sleeping?” Gus whispered loudly as Justin’s eyes fluttered open. 

“Good morning, Gus.” Justin pulled the little boy close as he wrapped his arms around Justin’s neck.

“I’m so glad you are home.”

“I am very glad to be home, too.”

“Am I invited to this snuggle fest.” Brian said, peeking over Justin’s shoulder.  

“Daddy, you moved.  How did you get over there? You were over here,” he pointed behind his small body.

“I was a little chilly so I asked him to come warm me up,” Justin jumped in.

“Did it work?” Gus asked.

“It definitely did.” As Justin said this, Brian pulled Justin’s pants into place, and then his own.  “I better go check on Aaron.” Justin started to get up but Gus put a hand on his shoulder.

“Ronni got him a while ago.  I am so glad you are home but I will miss Grandma and Molly.  I wish they always lived here.”

“Well, you will see them again tomorrow when they come for Thanksgiving and I think Molly will stay for a few days.”

“Grandma can’t stay?”

Brian smiled at Gus, “I think your grandma has a friend she wants to spend a couple days with.”

“Well, I’m her friend, too.” Brian and Justin had to laugh at Gus’ pouty face. He then went directly into, “I’m hungry.  Are you hungry? I bet Ronni is making breakfast.”

“Why don’t you run down and tell her we will be down in a couple minutes.  I will make sure Daddy J feels Ok and then we will be down.”

Gus was barely out the door when Brian ran his hand under Justin’s shirt.  “I think you feel great but how’s your headache.”

Justin turned to face Brian, kissing him. “It is actually barely there.  I think Len was telling the truth.  I don’t think he had any intention of killing me.  I think he’s an idiot but he knew the easiest way to get you upset was through me.”

“Well, it worked. I think they should put him in a cell with that shit spraying.” Justin gave him a look, “We better get up.  We can come back up and shower after breakfast.”

“And maybe have a workout?”

“I’m counting on that.”

After breakfast with the boys, Brian and Justin walked back to their room and undressed before Brian followed Justin into the shower. Justin picked up a bar of soap and began to slowly run it over Brian’s chest.  Soon he put the soap down and began to  move his hands over the slippery skin. He brought his hands up to Brian’s face and brought it down so he could kiss him. Brian’s arms encircled Justin and ran his hands down Justin’s back and rested on Justin’s ass, pulling him close.

Brian dropped his head on Justin’s shoulder, “It is so good to have you here in my arms.  I really want to wrap you in bubble wrap and not let you leave my side.”

“Brian, you know I am safe in the house.”

“We thought you were safe in the house.” Now Brian picked up the soap and ran it over Justin’s back and then his ass, continuing to add pressure as both of their cocks grew harder. As their mouths fused once more Brian dropped the bar and he began to gently massage Justin’s pink bud.

“Brian, I need you.  I need you, now.” Justin turned and supported himself against the glass and Brian, holding onto his hips, slipped in. He heard Justin sigh. Brian was not in the mood for slow sex.  He began to move fast and furious and within moments they both cried out as they hit climax together. Brian leaned against him pressing him tightly against the glass and stayed there for a few moments. 

“Can we stay here all day?” Brian said in his ear.

“I would love to but there is too much to do today,” Justin turned into Brian.

“Sunshine, you are not going to do anything today except play with our boys and nap.”

“Brian, I have to help.  We are having twenty people for dinner tomorrow.”

“And we have a caterer, a culinary student, and our house manager that can all do that.”

“I know but...Bri, I need to get things back to normal. James needs to see me back to normal.”

“It is just like you to put everyone else first. Just promise to take it easy and if I see you pushing yourself, I will make you.”

“I love you, Brian. I love you because you take care of me, even when I don’t need taking care of.” They finished rinsing off and dressed for the day.  

“In case you have forgotten, I love you, too, Sunshine.  I just can’t imagine going on if you weren’t here.”

“But you would because we have two beautiful boys that would need their daddy. Now lets go see what Ronni has for us to do. Oh, and don’t forget the doctor is coming now too.”

By the end of the day,  Justin was tired but he felt good.  He hadn’t had a headache all day and, as the day went on, he saw Gus relax back to his normal self. It was after 10:00 when the house went quiet.  Ronni and Tracy were getting up early so it was just Brian and Justin by the fire with a hot toddy. They quietly talked about the next day when Brian felt Justin drift away.

“Sunshine, where’d you just go?”

“I need to go up to the studio.  I don’t want to have that hanging over me.  I need to go up there and chase away all that negativity.  I love that space.  It is so perfect for me to work in.  The lighting is amazing.  And James needs to know I’m good with it.”

“Let me go with you.”

“You don’t have to.  I will be fine.”

“I need to.  I keep picturing you on the floor. Your skin was so red.” Brian shivered. “I was so scared.”

Justin stood and offered his hand to Brian.  “We have both had to face too much. But you know what?”

As they walked toward the door Brian put an arm around his shoulders, “What, Sunshine?”

“We have made it through my father and your mother.  I think we are in for good things, a good life.  I mean look at our boys.  No matter how much is thrown at us, they are always there to show us what is good in our life.”

“Yes, they do.” 

They entered the studio.   Justin went right over to the remote and picked it up. He pushed the power button and stood there, looking at the fan system defiantly. He took a deep breath and only smelt a flow of fresh air. 

“Let me sketch you.  Just relax.  Turn on TV if you want or listen to some music.” Brian stretched out on the sofa and picked up the TV remote.  He flipped through channels and without thinking about it started watching a nature documentary with beautiful scenery.  Justin watched him evaporate into the show. He worked quickly and started at Brian’s feet propped on an ottoman. He drew up those amazing long legs.  He could feel them in his mind, the fine hair that covered them as it ran over his own legs. By the time his sketch was ready for Brian’s face, Brian was sound asleep.  Justin drew each plain and curve of the perfect face and when he looked at the whole image, he realized the face he had drawn, although it looked like Brian, had a child’s look to it somehow.  It reminded him of Gus when he was sleeping. It just showed him how many demons Brian lived with when he was awake but when he could let himself go…. How could his parents….how could the Kinney’s treat him like that. They didn’t deserve him.

“Brian, let’s go to bed.” He sat next to Brian and gently shook him. “Hey, it’s midnight.  We have a full day tomorrow.” 

Brian’s eyes fluttered open and he smiled a gentle, sweet smile, so much like Gus. “Sorry, I fell asleep.” He wrapped his arms around Justin and pulled him in, kissing him on the forehead. “At least you didn’t have to tell me to stop moving,” he smiled at Justin.

“No, you were the perfect subject.” Justin said as he stood and moved toward the door.  He picked up the remote and turned off the ventilation system before flipping the light switch and moving down the stairs.

“Sunshine, what would you think of connecting the upstairs of the house to the studio?”

“I mean I can do the steps but it would make it simpler for the boys to pop in.  Wouldn’t it take some major structural additions?”

“I’ve been thinking that maybe we could just add a walkway along the back of the house. I think we could have a window in the studio changed to a door and then a walkway to the window in the hall.”

“I like that idea.” Justin moved through the house and back up the stairs to their bedroom. They peeked in on both boys who were sound asleep and then they stripped and got in bed.

“I didn’t even look at the picture you drew.” Brian said as they lay side by side.

“I think I am going to paint it.  You can see it when I am done. Goodnight, love.” Justin lay his head so he could hear Brian’s heart thumping.

Brian tightened his arms around him, “Goodnight, Sunshine.”

Tracy and Ronni woke before 6:00. They worked side by side, Ronni focused on the side dishes while Tracy finished up a couple desserts.  It was rare that it was just the two of them in the busy kitchen and their friendship had cooled a bit since the interaction about Justin.  They had been polite but each had kept their distance but this week they had worked together helping with the boys and now they were getting ready to feed a houseful of people.

“I take it you have come to your senses?”

“Well, that is questionable but,” she smiled, “if you are talking about Justin, yes. If only I could know a man cares about me as much as Brian and Justin care about each other.”

“They do have a love that is rarely seen. I think Jamie and Emmett have something special, too.  I have never seen my son so in love and watching Emmett protect him this week, when he was feeling so low, showed me he will watch out for him when I can’t.”

“And you, are you in love, Veronica?”

“Oh, I wish you could answer that for me.  I do care about this man a lot.”

“This man? He has to have a name.” Tracy draped an arm around Ronni’s shoulder.

Ronni smiled, “His name is Dante.  Dante D’Angelo.  His name means steadfast angel and oh he is that.” The smile that lit up her face told Tracy all she needed to know.

“Remember what Brian and Justin said.  He is welcome here.  If I had someone I loved, I would be spending every night I could with him.”

“Well, he has a life and he travels for his company.  He has done well for himself and one of the offices is in Chicago so he spends some time there.”

“And does he own a home here?”

“He actually owns a house in Chicago right now and rents a place here.”

“Well, I am anxious to meet this man. We should have a fun group of people around today,” Tracy said with a little excitement in her voice. I told my friends that there would be a fun group.”

“Did you have a chance to check all the bedrooms upstairs?”

“I did.  All the beds have fresh sheets and the bathrooms have towels just in case someone wants to spend the night.  No one has an excuse to drive tipsy when we have plenty of room between the house and the poolhouse. If my friends choose to stay overnight I told them they could have the poolhouse.”  Tracy glanced at her phone.  

Ronni had noticed Tracy’s phone had been very active all morning.  “Who are you ignoring today? I have seen you answer a couple texts but you are ignoring most of them.  Are they from your family?”

“I did text Happy Thanksgiving to them earlier.”

“Then who wants your attention now? Is there someone you haven’t told me about?” As Ronni said it she saw Tracy’s expression change.  What is it, Trace?”

“Damn, I was trying to ignore it, hoping he would just go away.”

“Who, Tracy?” Now Ronni had more concern.

“It’s my ex.  He is trying to be sweet.  He figured I didn’t have any place to be today so he invited me to his parents.”

“Well, I hope you told him you have plans that he can’t match.” Ronni said flippently but then she looked into Tracy’s eyes. “Tracy, you aren’t actually thinking about doing that are you? You told me he was cruel.  He used to beat you.  You know that hasn’t changed, right?”

“He has completed his anger management and….Ronni, he has been very sweet. He told me he was sorry.”

“You didn’t tell him where you lived did you?”

“I didn’t but….”

“Tracy, but what?”

“He said he knows where I live. I don’t think he knows exactly where I am but I do think he has an idea what area I live in.”

“Tracy, you are playing with fire. Block him.  Change your number.  Remember one of the reasons you liked this job in the beginning was because the place does have protection. You aren’t in a place alone.”

“I know but now I am wondering…”

“Ronni, oh Tracy you’re here, too. Happy Thanksgiving!“ Gus rushed in and hugged both of them around the waste. Is the turkey in the oven?  Is it cooking?”

“Look, silly, it is right here.”  Tracy picked him up and showed him the unbaked turkey on the counter behind them.

Gus pulled a face, “We can’t eat it that way.”

“No, you are right.  I am putting it in the oven right now.”

“Will it be ready on time?”

“Yes, Gus.  It should be done around noon and we aren’t eating until 1:00.  What would you like for breakfast?”

Can I have cereal?” Gus asked as he climbed onto one of the stools, watching Tracy put the big bird into the oven.

“You may have cereal but you might like one of these.” Ronni showed Gus a plate of freshly made cinnamon rolls.  “Tracy made these last night and baked them this morning.”

“Oh, yes please.”  As Gus pulled the first round off of the roll, Brian, Justin , and Aaron arrived in the kitchen. 

Brian held a smiling Aaron as he took his first sip of coffee. “Come here, beautiful boy,” Ronni said as she took him out of his daddy’s arms.  “Let’s put you in your seat and give you a bit of the cinnamon roll along with some fruit of course.”

“Brian, do you want one of those?”  Justin asked as he got out two plates.

“Of course, otherwise Gus will be mad when I eat his.” He ruffled Gus’ hair and then acted as if he was going to take his breakfast but Gus slapped his hand and Brian hugged him tight, kissing his cheek. “It is all yours, Gus.”

Justin set a roll in front of Brian and then in front of an empty stool where he sat down on the other side of Gus.  When Brian had finished eating and was putting his dish in the dishwasher, Ronni, inconspicuously, pointed into the laundry room and they both slipped out of the room. “What’s up, Ronni? You want me to give you away at your wedding?”

“Be quiet, Brian.  This is serious.” Ronni pulled some dried towels out of the dryer.

“Sorry, Ronni.  What is it?”

“I have already texted Jamie about this but I wanted to let you know too. Tracy is thinking about seeing her ex.  It is the holiday season and she is feeling alone.  Her family doesn’t want her around and he has started contacting  her saying he’s changed.  We know that is bull.”

Brian was serious now.  “I am not sure what I can do but thanks for letting me know.  Maybe Justin can figure a way to approach the subject.”

“No, Brian, you need to talk to her.  You know what it is like to have to make a family rather than be with your own.”

“I never thought of it that way but I do have a family now.” 

“Brian, she has met your mother.  She knows you had to work at it but look at the family you have made. I think it will be best if it comes from you. Of course, she may totally ignore you.  Jamie will check that security is in place and he will wait at the gate and lock it when the last one arrives.”

“Ronni, you are a good friend.  I will ….”

“This is where you two are.  What’s going on?” Tracy walked in and  picked up a couple towels Ronni had just folded.

“I will take all of these into the kitchen,” Ronni took the towels from her and left Brian standing there in front of Tracy.

“Oh, I guess I know what’s going on now. She told you about my texts this morning.”

“Tracy, she is just concerned for you.”

“She can be very nosey.”

“Maybe a little but we both know her heart is in the right place.” Brian shuffled, not really knowing what to say.  “This is usually something I would pass off to Sunshine but Ronni is a wise woman.  Trace, I know I can’t tell you what to do but I can tell you when Justin was gone and I didn’t think I would ever see him again. I realized no one is better than the wrong one. I know it is different but, don’t settle.  I spent a couple years at Jenn’s for the holidays.  I knew I was loved there and I wasn’t just looking for a physical fix.  Don’t settle for someone who might make you feel good for a minute but leaves your heart and maybe your body, aching.”

“But Brian, this is so different. I love him.  He isn’t dead and he’s changed.  He went through the classes he needed to take.”

Brian put his hand on Tracy’s shoulder, “Tracy, you are a grown woman.  I can’t tell you what to do but think about what he’s done to you in the past and did he WANT to take those classes to become a better person or did he need to take those classes to stay out of trouble. You are so young and talented. You have time to find someone who truly only wants to do what is best for you.”  Brian kissed her cheek.  “Just be careful.  We need you here.”

“I….I will be careful.  I need to go check on dinner.”  With that Tracy rushed out.

By the time Brian was back in the great room, Emmett was in the kitchen and although he didn’t see James, he was sure he was around, checking on security. Justin saw Brian go toward his office and he followed him.  “What is going on? First Ronni and then Tracy.”  Justin kissed him and put his arms around Brian’s waist.

“Sure you just wanted me to feel that amazing cock of yours pushing against me so I want you so much I can taste you.” With that Brian crushed his mouth against Justin’s.  

“Wow, and now I’m supposed to think straight?” Justin continued to lean against Brian. “So what’s up?”

“Tracy’s ex is trying to get her back.  James is going to stay at the gate until everyone arrives and then set all the alarms and stuff.”

“Why would she put herself through that again? Everyone knows people like that don’t change.”

“Well, it is not so easy to get your heart to change either.  It’s the holidays and she doesn’t have a family that wants her around.”

“And Ronni knew you’d understand that.”

“I wanted you to talk to her but, ya, Ronni knew I could understand.”

 “Are you going to call your mother today?” Justin asked.

“I don’t know.  I usually do on Thanksgiving but I just had her on my property for almost two months. I think I have had more than enough time with my family. I don’t think I will.”

“Did you talk to Claire? Is she going to be with your mom?”

“Actually, Claire is spending the day with her new man and the boys are with their father so I guess Catherine Joan is on her own. She’ll have her help in at some point today.” Brian kissed him again. “Damn, I would love to do this all day but, I have to send a note to Ted and the others coming from the office about the security check.”

“Ya, I am going to try to get Aaron, and maybe Gus to take a little nap and maybe get 20 minutes myself.”

Brian stroked Justin’s cheek, “That sounds like a great plan. I will see you in a little while.” He kissed him lightly before Justin let go of Brian and walked out of the office.  

Justin was surprised at how fast Gus and Aaron dozed off on the king sized bed in the master.  Once he knew they were asleep, he got up and moved out of the room.  It was 11:30.  He took out his phone and called Joan’s house.  

“Hello,” Joan’s clipped voice came over the phone.  

“Happy Thanksgiving.  Brian just told me you would be having lunch alone today and I wanted to …”

“Make sure I was miserable? Well, I am.  My neighbor is bringing me lunch but I don’t know what she will make.”

“I am sure Mrs. Connor will make an excellent meal.” Damn, why did he say that?

“How do you know Mrs. Connor? Let me guess that son of mine came to talk to her.  That makes a lot of sense.  That is how he got some of his information.  Has he found him yet? I am guessing he will look for that poor excuse for a man.”

“Joan, he hasn’t decided what he will do yet.” Justin talked a little bit longer to her responses of grunts. “Well, I need to go.  Our guests will be coming soon.  Gus is very excited.” There was a short pause. “That boy has ….” she stopped but Justin really thought he heard a little softness in her voice. “I’ll send you pictures now and then, if you would like.”

“Well, I guess it won’t hurt anything.”

“A person is only a baby once.  I bet Gus reminds you of Brian at that age.  I would love to see what he looked like as a baby.”  Silence.  “Well, have a nice day, Joan.” Justin put his phone away.  He wasn’t sure why he called her.  She just was apathetic about everything.  Well, he wasn’t going to think about her.  The first guests would be coming at any time now so he checked on the boys and after changing his shirt and moving Aaron to his crib, he and Gus went down to start the party.  

By 12:30 the house was buzzing. They had the dinner room table set as well as the set up in the great room Father Tom and the doctor were entertaining Gus or Gus was entertaining them.  Tracy’s friends from culinary school were helping in the kitchen and Ted and Blake along with others from Kinnetik were chatting by the fireplace.  Jenn and her friend, Tucker Martin were getting to know Cynthia and her date while Molly walked around with Aaron in her arms.

Emmett kissed James as he arrived at the house after setting the security after the last guest arrived. They joined Dante, Ronni’s friend, while she helped with getting dinner organized.

Finally, dinner was ready and Ronni directed everyone to find their seat.  Name cards had been placed at a seat making sure couples or two friends were near each other so everyone had a friend nearby but also had someone new to get to know. 

Brian and Justin stood in the one area they could see both tables of people.  Justin started, “We are going to have everyone move through the kitchen in a buffet line in a few minutes but first I just want to thank all of you for joining us today.  I know what it is like to spend a holiday alone and this is just much more enjoyable so welcome and please, if you need anything please feel free to ask.”

“You all know this year Gus and I got Justin back in our lives and then Aaron joined our family.  And there is nothing I could be more thankful for. Now I am not going to go around the room and make you all say what you are thankful for but while we are enjoying this feast so many helped prepare, maybe tell someone about something you are thankful for.  I know I have never felt more love than I have this year and for that, I am thankful.”  Brian lowered his head and kissed Justin before turning the meal over to Ronni.

The next two hours were filled with food, laughter, and building new friendships. As people left the table they all seemed to gravitate to different areas.  There was a movie started in the media room and music playing in the great room. Brian and Justin moved around and mingled but everytime they were apart for more than a few minutes they found each other again, just to touch or share a quick kiss as they moved on.  

At one point Justin stopped by Gus who was again monopolizing Father Tom’s time. Tom stood and put a hand on Justin’s shoulder.  “This has been wonderful.  I can’t remember the last time I have had such a great time.”

 “I hope you know you don’t need to stay with him,” he nodded toward Gus.

“I enjoy it.  I hate that because of some bad priests the rest of us have gotten such a bad reputation. The one thing I regret about being a priest is not being able to have a child of my own.  And because of said reputation, I have to be extremely careful about being in the presence of children.”

“I had never thought of it like that.  Well, if you ever have the urge to play cars  or play house or watch cartoons, give us a call.  Gus would love a play date.”

“Father Tom, are you going to play more?” Gus asked.  “Hey, Daddy J, I love company.” He hugged Justin and Justin lifted him up and kissed him.  

“You haven’t had dessert yet, have you?”  Gus’ face lit up and he shook his head.  “Well, why don’t you go over to the kitchen and ask Tracy’s friend Gracie to help you get whatever you choose.”  Gus kissed Justin’s cheek as Justin set him down.  “Tom, why don’t I show you my studio,” Justin said, putting his hand on the small of Tom’s back leading him out to the steps.

Once they were upstairs, Tom said, “So this is where your incident occurred?”

“It is but, don’t worry, it is safe now.”

“Yes, I heard that.  I am so thankful you are back to good health.”

“Yes, I have to regain a little stamina but other than that, I’m good. Tom, have you heard anything from the feelers you sent out about Kevin?”

“I have to admit, I have not had a lot of time to look yet.  I have talked to a couple of my friends at the seminary but I haven’t heard anything back.  How is Brian handling this?”

“He hasn’t had a lot of time to absorb it.  I think any relationship he had with his mother is now over.”

“I can understand that.”

“I called Joan this morning.”

“You did?” Tom looked surprised.

“I don’t want to break off the entire relationship with her until Kevin is located.  If we need any information I want her to not be completely pissed.” 

“That is very smart of you and very kind.  She is a bitter woman.  I shouldn’t tell you this but she did call me to take her confession this week.  I don’t see her ever changing but I have seen a glimmer of honesty on her face and I think, although she will never change, she is coming to an awareness that she must own her own actions.”

“I am hoping she will send me Brian’s baby pictures.  I don’t expect there to be many.  I have seen one of Jack holding him as an infant but that is the only one I have seen of him until he was in Jr. High when he spent a lot of his time at the Novotny’s.”

“Yes, Debbie is a colorful character but she has a heart of gold.” Father Tom smiled at the thought of the colorful woman.

“Well, I better join my guests.  Thanks for trying to help us.”

“Thank you for giving me such an amazing day.”

“Stay as long as you like. I think we have enough food for the next several days.  Before you leave please be sure to take leftovers with you.  Tracy and her friends were going to pack to go bags.’

The two men went back into the house and Brian appeared out of nowhere at Justin’s side.  “Where did you go?” Brian had worry in his voice.

Justin put a hand on either side of his face and kissed him. “I am fine, darling. I’m sorry.  I never thought you wouldn’t have seen us leave. I was just showing Tom my studio and giving him a break from Gus. What did we miss?” Justin slipped one arm in Brian’s as they walked further into the house.  “Have you talked to Dante, yet?”

“Just a little polite conversation.  Let’s go give him the third degree and see if he is worthy of her,” Brian said with mock strenuous.

“Ha, we can’t afford to lose Ronni and you know she would be out of here if you did that and from what I can tell, Dante could easily support her so she doesn’t need us.” Justin led the way across the room.

Brian draped his arm around Ronni’s shoulders as he so often did, “So, D’Angelo, what is it you do for a living?”  Brian had already completely reviewed his history from his humble, rough upbringing in Jamaica to his education in the U.S.  He was a sharp business man that Brian knew he would like.”

“Mr. Kinney, Mr. Taylor,” he nodded at both of them separately, “Thank you for the invitation today.  You know how to throw a great party and know how to make all your guests feel very welcome.”

“Well, we have told Ronni many times you are welcome to visit any time you are around,” Justin commented. 

They talked, getting to know each other, until Emmett walked up, “Excuse me, gentlemen.  Can I talk to you for a minute?” He took Justin’s arm and they walked off. “Jamesy asked me to find one of you.  Have you seen Tracy?”

“No, Em.  Where is James?”

“A man came to the gate, looking for Tracy.  He, of course, told the guy he didn’t know any Tracy and sent him away but he is still hanging out by the road.  One of the cameras is focused on him but he doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.”  Emmett led Justin to the small back security office where James sat.  He had a close up screenshot he had captured.

“Hey, Justin.  Have you ever seen a picture of Tracy’s ex?”

“I think that’s him.  Let me see.” Justin pulled out his phone and looked on a media site where he knew there were pictures of Tracy with him.  He held the phone up to the screen and although the guy’s hair was longer now, it was definitely him.”

“As long as he stays where he is, we can’t do anything about it, except warn Tracy. Thanks, James, and sorry you have had to work on a holiday. He doesn’t look like he is going to try to break in.  Come enjoy yourself.  You can keep an eye on him on your phone.”

“Don’t rush him off, Justin.  I have plans for him right now.” As he said it, he straddled James’                                                     lap and waved Justin off.

Justin moved back to the kitchen and located Tracy. “Hey, Justin, this is a great party.  My friends are enjoying themselves.”

“I’m glad.  You have wonderful friends.  Tracy, I need to tell you something. Your ex has placed himself outside of the gate. He somehow figured out where you were.”

“Oh, I’ll go talk to him. He has been texting and I haven’t been responding.”

“Please don’t go out there. Can’t you see, he is already getting control over you, again? Do you really want to feel like you have come or respond every time he calls?”

“Justin, don’t you do that with Brian all the time?”  Tracy was a bit defensive.

“The difference, Tracy, is that we have made a commitment to each other and if I ever texted and told him I was doing something he would give me my space and then it is up to me to let him know if I will be longer so he doesn’t worry.  And you know with Brian he worries because he loves me, not because he can’t stand not being in control over what I was doing.”

One of Tracy’s friends, Mark, walked up. “Hey, Tracy, is something wrong? You look so serious.”

“Oh, it’s my ex.  He is trying to get me to come out. He says he wants to get back together.” 

“Tracy, after all you have told me about him and you are thinking about going back to him?”

“Listen to him, Tracy.  Mark is a true friend.” Justin patted his shoulder and then slipped away.  He had seen the way Mark looked at Tracy.  He hoped Tracy could see this is what a good man looked like and how someone who cared really acted.

Brian’s arms crept around Justin’s shoulders and Justin rested against him.  “You are a hard man to keep track of today.”

“Sorry, Tracy’s ex is at the gate.  Well near the gate.”

“Tracy’s not going out to talk to him, is she?”

“I hope I showed her how wrong that would be and right now Mark is talking to her and I think he will get through to her.  He really cares about her.”

“Hell, he wants to be under her skirt.” Brian said softly.

“Such a romantic.  Good thing I know you don’t want under anyone’s skirt.” Justin turned around and dropped his head to Brian’s chest.

“You need to rest,” Brian walked him to the sofa and made him sit. “Relax for a few minutes. Close your eyes.  I will make sure the doctor says goodbye when he leaves but I think everyone else is staying until later.”

Justin didn’t argue.  He lifted his face and Brian kissed him before throwing a blanket over him and walking away.

Brian found James, wanting to check on the ex situation.  He found James looking at his phone, checking the cameras.  “Is he still out there?”

“He is.  I can tell from his behavior, he is getting really agitated.”

“Where’s Tracy?”

“I think she is in the hot tub with her friends.”

“Where’s her phone?”

“It is on the counter. And trust me, it is blowing up.”

Brian walked over and tried to open the phone.  

“Brian, that is not really proper,” James said.  “It is her private…”

“She lives in my home and her ex is a threat to my family right now.  I want to know what he is saying.” 

Ronni walked up, “Is that Tracy’s phone?”

“Ya, why?” Brian asked as Ronni took it and then handed it back. He could now see her texts.

“I have seen her open it a hundred times. But I didn’t do that and I will never do that for you again.  I know this is for her safety.”

Brian started looking at the texts with James looking over his shoulder. He forwarded several of the texts to his phone and then from his phone he texted it to the detective on Justin’s case.  He then walked to the office and waited for a call.  Moments later his phone rang.

“What the hell is going on over there, Kinney?”

Brian explained who had written the texts and that he had just completed court mandated anger management.  “I don’t think he realizes she lives here.  I think he thinks she is just here for the day. You can tell from the texts he has gotten angrier and angrier as time has gone on.  Now a couple of my guests are getting ready to leave and I don’t know if I can trust his stability.  James and I will go out but I thought if you had any connections out here….”

“Do not go out there.  I think someone will be there in about five minutes.  If the guy moves on, the officer will stay outside your place to make sure he has really left.  If he won’t go, he will be arrested for ….well I am sure he is doing something to do with his anger management.”

“Brian, a police officer is out front,” James said as he entered the office. 

Brian nodded at James and said, “The officer is here.”

“Great.  Let me know if you have any further issues.”

“Thank you so much and, Detective, Happy Thanksgiving.”

Brian knew he had to tell Tracy what was going on. As he walked into the kitchen Ronni sidetracked him.  “Jamie told me you have contacted the police.”

“Those texts were threatening not only to her but to all my guests.  I have an obligation to everyone I invited here today.”

“You don’t have to convince me, Brian.”

“How do you think she will react?”

“You wanted Justin to talk to her? Now is the time for him to talk.”

“Thanks, Ronni.  Is she still in the hot tub?”

“She is getting out now.  I will stall her long enough for you to fill Justin in. She will need to change but then she will look for her phone.  I will tell her I put it somewhere and can’t remember where but that won’t last long.”

James walked up and softly said, “The police have pulled up.” James handed the Tablet to him that he had pulled the camera up on and as he did so Brian watched as the police got out of the car and before anyone could decide what was going to happen,  Tracy’s ex who had been pacing by the car reached into the open window and pulled out a gun. Brian and James both caught their breath and before either of them could say anything they saw him aim in the air and pull the trigger. 

Everyone in the house gasped at the sound of the shot.  Tracy and her friends rushed in draped in towels and as another shot rang out, the camera turned to snow.  Had the police fired a warning shot? Had Tracy’s ex shot out the camera? They all stood there in fear as several more shots followed and then all was silent.

Chapter 12

James rushed out the door without thinking about what he was doing. He took cover behind car after car working his way up to the front gate.

“Brian, what is going on?” Justin called across the room as he held Aaron in his arms and looked to see Gus protected by Father Tom. 

Brian rushed across the room and put his arms around Justin and Aaron as Tom made his way over to them with Gus,  “Gus, it’s alright. We are going to go by your dads, Ok?”  Once they got near, Gus rushed to his dads. 

Tom continued out of the room and followed James outside. He saw James ahead of him and followed his lead. As he saw James stop at the edge of the gate. Tom whistled softly to get his attention as he came close to him, not wanting him to surprise him. “Do you have any idea what’s going on?” he whispered.

James brought his mouth close to Tom’s ear.  “A police car, two police officers, one suspect.  Suspect shot first and then lost the camera.”

Tom looked at the gate and getting low on the ground crawled until he could see around it.  Without turning to look at James, Tom, nearly silently, jumped and boosted himself over the gate and dropped on the other side. Immediately ducking behind the bushes. He then saw a police officer sitting up leaning against the car, blood running down his arm.  Tom closed the space between him and the car. “The man?”

“I don’t know.  I’m alright.  Can you see my partner?” the officer asked.

As Tom moved around to the back of the car, James came over the gate.  James went to check the first officer’s arm and Tom looked around the back of the car and saw two men down. Just as Tom got to the second police officer, another police car arrived. Tom checked for a pulse and found one.  He then lifted his hands up and called to the new arrivals, “I’m Father Tom Butterfield.  I was attending the gathering here today.  Both officers need an ambulance.  I have not checked the other man yet.  When James stood, the officers aimed their guns at him but in one hand he was holding up the security credentials showing he was employed here.

One of the new arrivals recognized James, “What happened here?” They were doing first aid on all three men as the ambulance pulled up. That’s when Tom got the gate code from James and jogged back to the house to let everyone in the house know it is safe.

Everyone in the house was in small groups and as the silence outside continued people started getting restless.  “Gus, you take care of Aaron and Daddy J.  I am going to see if I can find out what is going on.”

“Brian,” Justin grabbed him and kissed him.  “Don’t you dare do anything stupid.”

“I won’t.  I will be back in a few minutes. Love you.”

“Damn, Brian, I love you.” Molly moved over and started telling Gus a story, hoping to distract him and herself.

Ronni had told Tracy what was going on and she was beside herself.  She had run to her room and Mark followed her.  “Mark, I should have just gone and talked to him. If I had done that none of this would have happened.”

“Tracy, if you had done that, you may have been out there and we don’t know what has happened yet,” Mark gently put his arms around her. “I don’t want anything to ever happen to you.  Tracy, you deserve so much better than what he did to you. You showed me some of today’s texts. He is dangerous Tracy.”

“But what if he hurt someone?”

“Oh, Tracy, to think you could have been out there with him.” Mark kissed her cheek and then after looking directly into her eyes he whispered, “You did nothing wrong except fall in love with the wrong person. Let me show you what a real relationship should be like.”

“Mark, are you saying….”

“I’m in love with you.  I’ve been in love with you a long time. You don’t have to love me back but at least give me a chance.” 

Tracy moved closer and Mark gave her a light kiss, “I am willing to take this one day at a time and it can take as long as you want it to.”

Brian moved out of the house and let out a sign of relief as he saw Father Tom jogging up. Brian grabbed him and kissed him without thinking about it.  “Thank god.  What happened? Where’s James?”

“He is still up front with the police.  Two police officers and the other guy were all shot but all of them are alive.  An ambulance just arrived.  I’m sure James will be able to tell us more when he comes back.”

“Why did you run after James? What did you think you could do?”

“Right out of high school I joined the Marines.  I was military police.  Whenever there is an emergency I just go into military mode and think about it later. And besides, I have a lot of conversations with the big guy and if it is my time, I’m ready.”

The rest of the evening was a blur.  The doctor had rushed out as soon as Tom and Brian returned to see if he could help and once the ambulance had left he followed them to the hospital since he was supposed to go in soon anyway.  Once Ronni had given James a hug she started putting food out.  Tracy and Mark stayed in her room but the other culinary students along with Jenn helped and soon people were eating and drinking plenty of wine and whiskey.  

Emmett hugged James a long time without saying a word and then they walked back to their house in silence.  Once they arrived home, Emmett looked at James and kissed him.  It was first soft and sweet but then some desperation crept in.  They made it to their bedroom and then frantically removed their clothes and James took Emmett hard and fast before they both dropped onto the bed. They lay facing each other still touching and kissing and then tears began to roll down Emmett’s face.

“I was so scared.  All I could think was my big, strong, beautiful man is going to get killed.  I finally found someone who actually loved me and he…..”

“Emmett, it’s my job but I was careful and I was never in danger.”

“But I didn’t know that?”

“Oh, Em, I will always come back to you.  I love you. I would never be careless.  I know you are waiting for me.” He kissed Emmett adding depth to the kiss, stirring even more emotions in both of them.  When he finally backed off he looked at Emmett’s still damp cheeks.  “Emmett Honeycutt, I wasn’t going to do this yet but, will you marry me.  I mean I want to have a commitment ceremony with you. I want everyone to know that I belong to you and hopefully you want to belong to me.”

“Oh, Jamesy, yes!  A thousand times yes!” Em and James spoke about the future and what kind of ceremony they would have and when.

As their adrenaline returned to normal after the day’s events they began to doze but before they fell asleep, James brought up one more thing.  “Em, we’ve never really talked about it but, I’m hoping that you will have a family with me.  I watch Brian and Justin with their boys and I want to have that, too.”

“Nothing would make me happier,” Em said as he laid his head on James shoulder and they fell asleep.

It was after 11:00 pm when Brian wandered through the house once more.  Every bed in the house was occupied including the Murphy bed in Justin’s studio.  Father Tom volunteered to sleep there feeling completely safe there after talking to Justin up there earlier.  Brian poured himself a glass of brandy.  It wasn’t something he drank often but for some reason it was what he wanted tonight.  

“Do you mind if I join you?” Dante asked, appearing out of the dark hallway leading to Ronni’s room.

“What’s your poison?”

“Whatever you are having is fine.” Brian handed him a glass and gestured to the sectional where they both took a seat.

“I was wondering if we would have a chance to talk.”

“Are you worried about Veronica’s reputation?” Dante smiled.

“Oh, I enjoy breathing too much to cross her,” Brian laughed.

“She is a formidable force isn’t she?”

“We are very fond of her.  We hope she will stay with us for many years. I guess I am hoping she can stay with us if she chooses to stay with you.”

“Well, it would be nice if when I am in Pittsburgh we could be together and right now that isn’t always convenient with the distance between this place and the place I’m renting in the city.”

“Are you attached to your place in the city?”

“No, I mean it is a nice place but it is just a rental.”

“Well, I have several acres here that are not being used. I would be willing to build Ronni a house of her own.  That way she would be close, which her job does require but she would have her privacy to live her own life with you if that’s what she chooses.  I can see a three bedroom with an office and den.  That would give you enough room to work out of the house since your headquarters are actually in Chicago.  And we are willing to work with her time off and things like that.”

“Brian, that is very generous of you.”

“I know when I have a good thing and hiring Ronni and James was one of the best things we have ever done.  Our boys are our world and she is now like a grandmother to them.  By the way, my grandmothers never looked like her.”

“She is a very sexy woman. She is also very intelligent and has a heart of gold.”

“I was also thinking sometime, not tonight, I would like to talk business with you, too.  I think we could help each other out in a couple ways.”

“That sounds like a plan. I will be around for several days. Maybe early next week we can set up a meeting at your office.”

“That sounds good.”

“Angel, who are you talking to?”  Ronni came into the light wearing a filmy nightgown that definitely showed off her assets.

“Coming, Veronica.  Brian and I were just having a drink. Do you want me to bring one back for you?”

“The only thing I need is you,” she said and glided back into her room.

“We will set up something for next week.  Now I know I have a gorgeous woman waiting for me and you have a loving husband warming your bed.”

“Yes, and I think I can finally go to sleep.  Good night, Dante,” Brian stood and offered to take his empty glass.

“Sleep well, Brian.”

Brain entered quietly and undressed before sliding into bed.

“Baby, where have you been?” Justin asked as he rolled against him.

“I didn’t want to wake you. I’m sorry,” he pulled Justin close.  “Well, I would say we had an epic Thanksgiving celebration.:

“I am thankful that everyone is Ok.” 

Brian kissed the tip of Justin’s nose. “I am sorry the officers got hurt but I am happy that Tracy is now free of that asshole.”

Justin pressed his body along the length of Brian’s, “I’ve been laying here thinking about a lot of things. I don’t know how we can up our security and I don’t know if we need to.  I know today wasn’t directed at us but…”

Brian’s mouth moved to Justin’s and, putting a hand behind his head, Brian deepened the kiss. Justin reacted by draping his top leg over Brian’s hip and moving his cock ever so lightly against Brian’s sending a shiver through both of them. “I’ll do whatever it takes for you to feel safe.” Brian whispered in his ear as he grabbed Justin’s leg and pulled him into a position where he had access to Justin. He began to run his fingers behind Justin’s cock and then stroked the perineum until Justin begged for more.

“Please, my love, take me now. I need to be one with you.  We are one in heart and soul.”

Brian thrust his hips and Justin let out a sound of pure pleasure. As their lips and hips brushed against each other.  “Sunshine, you are right, we are one and will be until our lives end here. Our boys are so perfect. You are perfect.” Brian drove in a last time and Justin sent warm, creamy fluid over Brian’s stomach. 

Now it was time for Justin to move ever so slightly as he contracted around Brian’s erection until he, too, released his elixir deep inside him.  “Damn, Brian, how can you touch my very soul.”

“I love you, Brian Kinney and no matter where the future takes us just remember we will go there together.”

“I wouldn’t go anywhere without you, Sunshine.  You and our boys make everything worthwhile. Now, turn over so I can hold you as we go to sleep.”

Tracy and Mark were up early and started making pastries.  A little later their other two friends arrived in the kitchen and by the time the rest of the house started waking, the kitchen was again filled with wonderful aromas. Fresh rolls were layered in baskets and pans full of bacon and sausage were in warming trays along with eggs.  For those who wanted something light there was yogurt and fresh fruit.  Brian and Justin arrived early with the boys and Molly who had slept in with Gus.

“Wow, it’s like a fancy restaurant,” Molly said as she looked at all the food. 

Brian walked over to Tracy and slipped his arm around her waist.  “I just want you to know how happy I am that you are safe.”

“Brian, all that yesterday. It was my fault.”

“No, Tracy, the only thing that you did was try to think that he could change.” He glanced at Mark and softly said, “I think he’s a good guy.  Give him a chance.”

“Ya, I think I will,” she smiled shyly in his direction.

“This food looks beyond amazing.” Justin said as he poured a cup of coffee for Brian and himself.

Soon more people were trickling in, following the scent of food. Ronni and Dante strode out holding hands, not noticing anyone else in the room full of people. And as they sat down with a plate of food they were sharing Emmett and James walked in looking as happy as Ronni and Dante. 

Once Em and James had picked up some food and coffee, they went and sat near Ronni and Dante. “Jamey, you and Em both look very happy this morning.”

“I could say the same for you, Ronni?” Emmett said.

“Mama,” James said as he reached for Emmett’s hand, “I want you to know first.  Emmett and I are going to get married.  Well, as close to married as we can.  We know we want to be together and have a family.  Please, say you are happy for us.  I know you always wanted me to find the right person and….”

“And Emmett is the perfect person for you, Jamey.  I know how much he loves you and I can see your love for him.  Go tell your friends.  It is time to celebrate.”  

As they walked away, Dante brought his mouth to her ear, “We can announce our news, later.  We have the rest of our lives to spend together.” 

“Thank you, Angel.  They deserve this moment.”  Ronni kissed her love and then broke a piece of a croissant off and popped it into his mouth.

“You deserve the world, and I plan to work the rest of my life to give it to you.”

“I don’t want you to work.  I want you to enjoy life with me.”

“Veronica, I plan to do just that.”

A cheer went up as Em and James announced their decision.  Ted and Blake were the first over to congratulate them with others following behind. Brian and Justin hung back, Brian pulling Justin close, “It looks like we have a lot of unions to look forward to.  I don’t know when but I am fairly sure Dante and Ronni are a permanent thing and Ted and Blake are committed,” Justin said as he kissed Brian, lightly.

“They can just see how perfect life is when you are with the right person,” Brian held Justin tightly.  “Remind me to tell you about my conversation with Dante last night.”

“Ya, you talked to him quite a while last night.”

“I think we will be talking more often.  Right now I think we need to mingle before our friends start leaving.”

It was almost noon before the last group left.  Molly was staying until Sunday and Justin insisted Ronni and Tracy take off the rest of the week.  With Molly’s help they would easily take care of the house and the cooking, especially with all the leftovers.  

Over the weekend everyone had a chance to relax.  On Saturday afternoon when the boys were taking their afternoon naps,Brian told Justin about his offer to Dante.  “I think Ronni and Dante will definitely need space of their own and the poolhouse is just too small.  I think the best option is to have a house built in another corner of the property.  We can agree on a price I will pay and Dante can pick up the rest if they want bigger and better.”

“That sounds like a perfect solution,” Justin responded as he rested against Brian on the sofa. “What are you going to do about finding your father?”

“Well, I know Tom is doing some of the legwork and passing it on to the private detective I hired. I told them not to look too hard until the first of the year. I don’t want anything to distract me from celebrating Christmas.  Since I don’t think Lindsay and Mel are coming back for the holiday, I want to be here for Gus.  They told him they would come for Christmas and now it doesn’t sound like they will even be together after Christmas.”

“Well, we will have to make him feel safe and loved.  Hopefully we can set up some calls with them at least.”

“And if they don’t get their shit straightened out I will take full custody of Gus.”

“Can you imagine the house without him in it all the time?” Justin went quiet.

“No, I can’t and I don’t see it happening any time soon.  He loves it here.  He loves being with his brother, not to mention Ronni,” Brian said as he joined Justin in silence. Justin shifted so he was sitting across Brian’s lap and then pulled him down and soon they were stretched out next to each other and silently touched and kissed until they drifted off.  

“Daddies!  Why are you sleeping?”

“We’re sleeping because we knew you were having fun with Aunt Molly and Daddy J needed a nap,” Brian smiled as Gus crawled over them.

“Seems to me you were sleeping, too!” Justin said.  “Don’t let your daddy tell you he wasn’t sleeping.” 

“I don’t always like naps but sometimes I do.  Mommy and Mama used to take naps when I did sometimes. I miss Mommy and Mama.  How many weeks until they come home for Christmas? Can I make a calendar and cross off the days?”

Justin instinctively tightened his arm around Gus and looked at Brian. He nodded and they all sat up, Gus sitting on Justin’s lap. 

“Daddy,” Gus took Brian’s hands, “why are you looking so sad?”

“Well, Gus, I guess I am sad because I think you will be sad.”

“Why will I be sad?”

“Your mommy emailed me and they are so sorry but they aren’t going to be able to come for Christmas.” Brian held his hands tightly as Gus’ lower lip began to quiver.

“But I want to see them.  I love them,” big tears slipped out of his eyes. Brian pulled Gus into his arms and held onto him tightly as he wrapped his arms around Brian’s neck.  His whole body trembled as he sobbed. Both Justin and Brian’s eyes were teary as Justin put his arms around both of them and they sat that way until Gus loosened his grip on Brian and turned around to face Justin. He crawled over to Justin and hugged him next.

“I’m sorry you are so sad, Gus.  We are sad, too.”

“Why aren’t my mommies coming to see me? Don’t they miss me?”

“Oh, I am sure they do, Gussy.  I am not sure why they can’t come but I am sure it is important.  You know you are important to your moms.  And you are so special to us.”  Justin rocked Gus in his arms for several minutes.  As he did so he could see how angry Brian was.  He was sure there would be an email sent to Europe before the end of the day if he didn’t stop him.  “Brian, don’t do anything until we talk,” Justin said softly.   “Gus, how about we go up to the studio and you can paint a picture for your moms. If we send it to them this coming week they should have it by Christmas. You can tell them how much you miss them.”

“Ok, Daddy J.”

Justin stood with Gus in his arms as Gus wrapped his legs around him. Justin turned to Brian and Brian kissed him.  “Go check on Aaron and let Molly know we are in the studio.”

By bedtime, Gus had come to terms, as much as a five year old can,with the fact he wouldn’t see his moms for Christmas. He had painted two pictures, one for each of his moms and Brian would get them in the mail on Monday. The remainder of the weekend Brian and Justin were amazed at Gus’ resilience. On Sunday evening Brian and Justin, along with Aaron, put Gus to bed together.  

“I have preschool tomorrow?”

“Yes, you have preschool tomorrow.  I think you are going to have lots of fun.  You are going to have special activities until Christmas.” Justin said as he pulled Gus’ pajama top over his head as Brian pulled the blankets back and fluffed up his pillows while Aaron crawled away from him on the bed.  Brian snatched him up and threw him in the air.

“Brian, don’t rile him up.  It is almost time for him to go to bed,” Justin had to smile at Aaron’s expression of pure joy.

Gus got in bed and, handing Aaron to Justin, Brian tucked the blankets  in around him.  “Daddies?”

“Yes, Gus,” Brian responded with a smile.

“I’ve been thinking about my mommies. I miss them so much but, I still have my dads. Some kids don’t have any mommies and daddies or their moms and dads aren’t very nice. And Aaron doesn’t have a mommy but we both have you. I am so lucky I have lots of people that love me.”

“Oh, Gus, you are so right. Your Daddy and I love you. Grandma Jenn and Aunt Molly love you.  Ronni and Tracy love you,” Justin and Aaron hugged Gus and kissed him goodnight.

“Do you think my other grandma, the one that was in the little house, loves me?”

“If she doesn’t she is the one losing out,” Brian kissed him before turning on his night light and walking to the door.  They turned off the light and each threw him one more kiss before shutting the door.

Brian and Justin took Aaron with them to their room and set him on the bed as they both undressed and pulled on shorts and t-shirts.  It was early but, although it had ended up being a relaxing couple days after the excitement of Thanksgiving, they were ready to just relax in their bed.

Aaron crawled up on Justin’s lap and when he snuggled against him, Brian and Justin brought him to the nursery where he grabbed his favorite bunny and immediately fell asleep. Together they returned to the master. 

Justin pulled Brian close, “You know life couldn’t get much better.  Gus is just so amazing.  How did we deserve him? Thank you for bringing him into my life.  It just shows me what an amazing child you were.”

“I was a shit. Oh, and Aaron, how did you and he turn out so amazing?”

“You were just treated that way. I am guessing your heart was just as big as Gus’ but you weren’t allowed to show it.” Justin tugged off Brian’s shirt and in one motion he pulled Brian’s shorts down and pushed him back onto the bed. He dropped to his knees and spread Brian’s legs apart enough so he could slide between them and then as one hand slid under him, Justin took Brian in his mouth as he slipped his finger into him and began to stroke his prostate.

‘Oh, god Justin, I don’t know how you make that feel,” Brian arched as Justin changed the angle of his finger, “OH, so good,” he fought not to climax.  He didn’t want it to end, not yet. Justin knew how to work him.  He would bring him to the very edge and then back off.  He would either remove his mouth or hold his finger still and then he would again let him soar.

Eventually, Brian pleaded with him, “Sunshine, let me …. Oh I need to….” with that Justin began to thrust his finger in and out and began to suck throwing Brian into a major climax. His whole body reacted as he cried out. As he began to come down he grasped at Justin’s t-shirt, pulling him up at the same time he was pulling it off. He pushed Justin onto his back and began to return the favor.  He took it very slow and before he even got near his cock, Justin was desperate for more.  Brian teased and taunted him without taking his dick in his mouth but then at the moment Justin knew he couldn’t hold on, Brian’s mouth lowered onto Justin erection and drained him as Justin thrashed with pleasure. They both collapsed onto the mattress.

For several minutes they laid flat on their backs, fingers laced together just working at breathing normally again. Eventually, Justin shivered and Brian reached down, pulling a blanket over them. “Sunshine, I want to make this a Christmas Gus will never forget.  Let’s have Em and Ronni decorate every inch of the house.  Maybe Gus can pick where he wants the trees.”

“He will love that so much. Brian, maybe now isn’t the best time but, can we just get away for a weekend or maybe for New Year’s Eve?”

“You see if you can line up childcare and leave the rest up to me for New Year’s Eve.”

“Really, Brian? Do you think Gus will be alright with that? If not we can wait until maybe Valentine’s Day.”

“We will talk to him.  If he doesn’t want us to leave we will stay.”

“I will talk to Molly and see if maybe she could come out and maybe Tracy will be willing to spend New Year’s Eve in.  Mark could stay here with her,” Justin said and he moved close to him. His hand trailed down to Brian’s stomach.  “Make love to me, Brian.”  Justin turned over and Brian put his arm around Justin’s waist as he moved into him.

“I love you, Justin,” and with that Brian put all his efforts into making love.

The weeks between Thanksgiving and Christmas were full of activities.  Justin talked to Tracy and Molly and they were both willing to stay with the boys.  Mark was going to do his best to come over.  Brian also made sure Emmett and James would be on the property for security, although Tracy’s ex would be locked up for several months if not longer. They had joked he and Len could be cell mates.

Em and Ronni out did themselves and the house was so beautiful.  It smelled of Christmas everywhere.  Gus had decided that four Christmas trees on the main floor was perfect and then one in his bedroom.  There was a tree in the foyer, as well as one in the formal living room, one in the dining room and then a huge one in the great room where they spent most of their time.  He also insisted on small ones in the office and in Justin’s studio. 

Brian took Gus out to buy Justin a gift and then Justin took him out another day after preschool to shop for the rest of the people he loved.  He got Ronni and Tracy each a small gift he picked and he picked out something for his Aunt Molly and Grandma Jenn. As they walked to pay for the gifts Gus stopped, “Shouldn’t we buy my other grandma a present?”

Justin hugged him tightly, “I think that would be very nice.  What do you think you want to give her?”

“Something soft and fuzzy.  Soft and fuzzy always makes me happy but I don’t think she would want a teddy bear.”

“What do you think about getting her a soft fuzzy robe? You like to snuggle in yours after a bath.”

“Oh, yes!  That way she can get a hug everytime she wears it.” 

When they left thirty minutes later, there was a deep rose color robe with matching slippers in a store bag.  Gus insisted on wrapping it himself with Justin’s help and then the next day Justin said he would pick up Gus at preschool and they would drop it off.  

At the last minute, Justin took Aaron with him.  He also had Tracy pack up a basket of goodies for Joan.  He totally understood why Brian couldn’t and probably shouldn’t go visit but he wanted Gus to see kindness should be offered to everyone.  They could explain to him when he was old enough why Brian doesn’t interact with her.

Justin had texted Joan to make sure she was home.  She responded with just what he expected, ‘Where would I be’.

Gus walked ahead of Justin, carrying Aaron up to the door and Gus pushed the doorbell.  “Was this Daddy’s house?”

“Yes, this is where he moved when he was just about your age.”

“I like this little house.”  Gus said as the door opened.  “Merry Christmas!” Gus said as he handed her the big box.

Joan was taken aback.  “Well, what’s this?” 

“It’s a Christmas present, silly. Daddy J has something for you, too,” Gus just walked past her.

“Well, I guess you are coming in,” she stepped to the side letting Justin and Aaron to walk in.

“Merry Christmas, Joan,” Justin said as he entered.  “I’ll just set this basket on the table.  It is just some Christmas sweets that Gus has been helping Tracy make.  Oh, by the way, Tracy says hi.”

Justin was almost sure he saw Joan’s mouth flutter upward for a moment. Aaron started squirming trying to get out of Justin’s arms, “Let the boy down.  My floor is clean.  A girl came in yesterday and vacuumed.”

“Joan, I never doubted that your house was clean.” Justin sat on the sofa and set Aaron down so he could hold himself up using the length of it.

Gus was polite but had to look around a little in the living room.  “Did my daddy really live here?” he looked at her.”

“Of course he did,” she said a little harshly.

Gus continued to roam.  He picked up a piece of paper.  “You kept my picture! And that’s a picture of me and Aaron and Daddy.” He had picked up a framed picture.

Justin smiled, “You framed it.”

“Well, it was time to put a new picture in that frame. And it fit.”

Justin nodded, “It is a great picture. Oh, Aaron, come here.” Aaron had started crawling over to Joan. He was surprised when she lowered her hand and helped Aaron to his feet.

“He has grown.”

“Yes, he is growing too fast. He will be walking soon.” After a few more minutes, he could see Joan was getting uncomfortable.  “We’ll be going.  The boys need lunch and then it will be nap time.

As Justin picked up Aaron, Gus came over and opened his arms for a hug.  Joan awkwardly bent and gave him a little hug.  “Oh before we go, can you open your present? I want to see if you like it.”

“Oh, well, I guess.” Joan picked the package up off the table and carefully opened it.  As the paper fell away she lifted the lid and pulled the tissue paper away.

“I helped Daddy J wrap it.”

Joan couldn’t resist reaching in and touching the soft fabric of the robe and as she pulled it out, Gus took the box off her lap and set it on the floor by her feet.

“I am sure the robe will fit but if you prefer a different color or if the slippers don’t fit, there is a gift receipt in the bottom of the box,” Justin informed her.

“I picked out the color,” Gus offered.

Joan patted his shoulder.  “It will do.”

“Isn’t it soft? We talked about it and thought it was like getting a hug so maybe sometimes when you put it on you can think of me giving you a hug.”

Joan was now very quiet.

“Ok, Gus, we need to go now.” Justin directed Gus toward the door.  It was obvious Joan wasn’t going to say anything more.  “Thanks for letting us stop by.  Gus insisted he had to bring it himself. I’m glad you put up the picture.  Enjoy the robe.” With that they left Joan alone.

After putting the boys in their carseats and pulling out onto the road Gus said, “Daddy, she always seems sad or angry.  Why is she always mad?”

“Well, Gus, maybe she forgot how to be happy.”

“I will never forget how to be happy.  I am sad my mommies are so far away but I still have things to be happy about.”

“Oh, Gus, you could teach all the adults so much.”

That night as Justin told Brian about the trip, he rested his head on Brian’s chest and listened to his heart beat.  “She just won’t allow herself to be happy. I am starting to think she has forgotten how to feel anything.”

“Well, you have done far more for her then she is owed.”

“Brian, I totally understand why you feel that way and you have every right to, but love, if it wasn’t for that woman, I wouldn’t have you or Gus.  I owe her for giving me the two of you.”

Chapter 13

“Santa was here!  Santa was here! Daddy! Daddy J!  Santa came.” Gus threw himself between his dads.  “How did he get in my room and put them under my tree?  I was sure I would see him!”

“Merry Christmas, Gus.  That Santa is a wily one?” Brian kissed Gus.

“What does wily mean?” Gus looked at Brian.

Justin wrapped his arms around Gus and hugged him tight.  “Wily means he is sneaky but in a good way. He managed to get in there without waking you. What did Santa give you?”

“I didn’t open them yet.  Some of them are for Aaron so I wanted to open them with him.” Gus bounced onto Brian as he laid on the bed.

“Oh, take it easy on your old dad.”

“You aren’t old, well, you are but not really old.  You aren’t old like….”

“Watch it, boy,” Brian flipped and pinned him to the mattress as he leaned over and kissed Justin. “Merry Christmas, Sunshine.”

“Merry Christmas, my love. I will go check if Aaron is awake and meet you in your room.” Justin said to Gus.  “Just give me a couple minutes to change Aaron.”

Justin walked into the nursery, “Dadadada,” Aaron said and smiled at Justin. 

“Good morning, sweetheart. Merry Christmas! I know you don’t know what that is but I promise you will love it.” Justin lifted him out of the crib and carried him to the changing table where he changed his diaper and then slipped him out of his pajamas and put on the adorable Christmas romper Jenn had bought for him.  “I know you may not make the day in this but you have two more Christmas outfits.”  By the time Justin carried him into Gus’ bedroom Gus had divided the gifts into two piles on his bed.

Brian and Justin had bought several small but special gifts for the boys.  They were all things Gus had talked about but never actually asked for.  Aaron’s gifts were things Brian or Justin had heard Gus say he was sure Aaron would love. “Well, it looks like Gus has everything set out for you, Aaron.”

“Merry Christmas, Aaron,” Gus hopped off the bed and Justin dropped to a knee so Gus could hug his brother.  Aaron squealed. 

“Well, I think it is time to open the packages Santa dropped off,” Brian said with excitement in his voice. He took Aaron from Justin and sat on the bed. The next several minutes were filled with giggles of laughter and sounds of excitement as Gus and Aaron opened the gifts.

“How did Santa know this is just what I wanted?” Gus said now sitting on the floor with a small train 

“Well, you should know Santa always knows what you want most.”

“Oh, he did Daddy.  These are all just what I wanted.” 

“Well, I think I know what you want now,” Justin said.

“What’s that?”

“Your favorite caramel rolls that Tracy makes?”

“Oh, that would be good but Tracy isn’t here to make them.” Gus said holding onto Justin’s hand as the family of four made their way downstairs.

“Well, if I’m not mistaken, I think I smell cinnamon, just like in those rolls.”

“Daddy J, are you teasing me?” Gus broke away at the bottom of the steps and ran into the kitchen.  “Ronni, did you make my yummy rolls?”

Ronni stood by the counter with Dante beside her, an arm around her waist. “Well, Gus, all I did was bake them.  Before Tracy left yesterday, she made them especially for you and all I did was bake them.”

“Thank you, Ronni! Oh, and Merry Christmas!”

Ronni walked over and kissed the small boy, giving him a hug, “Merry Christmas, Gus.”  James and Emmett walked in arm in arm and Veronica hugged both of them.  Brian and Justin had talked with the household and had decided to make it a family Christmas. It would be the ten of them.  Emmett, James, Ronni, and Dante, would go to Emmett and James’ house and open gifts while Brian and Justin and the boys opened up theirs.  At 1:00 pm Molly and Jenn would join them and they would all have dinner together before opening the gifts they had for each other.  Then James and Em  and Ronni and Dante would all spend the evening together as couples while Molly and Jenn spent the rest of the day with Justin, Brian, and the boys.

There were many gifts for the boys and some for Brian and Justin. When Aaron had laid down for a nap before lunch and Gus was enthralled by his new toys, Brian handed Justin a small box and Justin handed one back to him. “You go first,” Justin said.

Brian peeled the paper off and flipped the lid open. “Oh, Sunshine, they are great!” Nestled in a deep burgundy velvet was a pair of platinum cufflinks.  They were engraved.  Each had a heart and in the center there was an A in one and in the other there was a G. They were simple and perfect for Brian to wear to work often.

“What did you get, Daddy?”

“Daddy J gave me cufflinks for my shirts.   Can you see what is on them?”  

Gus walked over and looked at them.  “I see my letter there and I see A for Aaron.”

“Your Daddy J did a great job picking them out.”

“Daddy J, what did Daddy give you?”

“Well, let’s find out.” Justin looked at the box and after pulling off the paper, he took the lid off.  “Oh, Brian,” Justin lifted out a black leather braided bracelet.  On the bracelet were four white gold small bands and each band had one of their names on it. Justin swallowed hard.  “This is so perfect. I mean…” Justin moved close to Brian and kissed him.  “Thank you, my love.”

“I like that!” Gus said looking at it closely.  

“I’m glad you do because,” Brian pulled out another box, “I have one for you, too. I got one for everyone.” Inside this box was a small bracelet which he slipped on Gus’ wrist and then slipped one on his arm.   There was still a small one in the box.”

“Brian they are so great for the whole family.”

“Both Gus and Aaron will be able to upgrade the band as they get bigger.”

“Gus, can you go over and play with your toys so I can kiss your daddy?”

“You will kiss him anyway,” Gus hugged Brian and walked to his toys.

Justin moved over and sat on Brian’s lap. “This is so special.  I love you.”

“I love you, too, Sunshine.”

“Are you done kissing so I can come back?” Gus said squeezing between them.

“Well, son, your dads will never be done kissing but right now,” Brian pulled him close and started dropping kisses all over his face and Justin joined in, kissing the cheek closest to him but then he ended up finding Brian’s lips and soon Gus was pushing them apart.

“We know, you love each other,” Gus said as he rolled his eyes.

Snow began to fall around noon and both Brian and Justin, along with the boys were glad Jenn and Molly made it to Britan before it got too heavy. Molly had texted that they were bringing clothes and planned to stay the night so they didn’t have to worry about traveling home after dark.  

By 1:00 p.m. the house had more occupants.  James and Emmett showed off the rings they had gotten for each other.  They were wearing them for the day but then they would be put away until they had their commitment ceremony.   Veronica and Dante also seemed closer than ever. Gus had fun showing his grandma, aunt and Ronni both his and Aaron’s gifts and they could see how proud he was of his new bracelet. They enjoyed the food and each other's company.  More gifts were shared but soon it was just family again, including Molly and Jennifer. They all relaxed around the great room.  Molly played with her nephews while the three adults sipped wine.

“I was surprised when you said it would just be the two of you.” Justin said.

“I really like Tuck but I prompted him to go to his family for the holidays. So many of my friends have brought someone home for Christmas, and they were in all of the pictures and by the time they were framed the relationship was over.   I wanted my kids to myself today.” Jenn choked up a little. “I never thought I would have another Christmas with both of you.” 

Justin moved from Brian’s side to Jenn’s, handing Aaron to Brian as he moved. He wrapped his arms around his mom and held her tight.  “I’m sorry.  I don’t think about how it affects you nearly as often as I should.  You are always here for us. We love you.”

“Oh, honey, I never doubt that.  You and Brian, and your amazing boys have brought me so much joy.  I can’t believe how Aaron…. First, he is growing so fast but more importantly, I wondered if it would be a struggle to really fall in love with him but, He is you. He is Molly, He is Brian. He is what I fell in love with about your father when I was twenty something.  Aaron is as perfect as you were.  And Gus I have loved for several years now. He will always be my first grandson.” Jenn watched the boys play with Molly as her son held her.  “I don’t think I could imagine a better Christmas.”

The remainder of the day was relaxed and enjoyable.  As the sun set, light snow began to fall. “Daddy, can we go outside and play in the snow? It isn’t too cold is it?”

“Well, it is definitely too cold for Aaron to be outside long,” Justin saw Gus’ face. “Brian, why don’t you take him outside.  I can stay in…”

“Both of you go outside.  I will stay in here with my beautiful grandson.  Go build us a snowman and then I will bring Aaron out to see it.”

Soon they were outside and building a snowman commenced. The temperature was mild and perfect for rolling balls and soon there was a snowman almost twice as big as Gus. standing in the front yard.  It had a scarf and a hat and Gus had named him  Fred.

“Gus, where did you come up with the name Fred?”  Justin asked as he packed a snowball and through it at Brian. 

“I don’t know.  I just like the name Fred.”

Brian scooped up Gus and they dodged behind ‘Fred’ as another snowball flew past them.  Brian and Gus made snowballs of their own and threw them at Justin, Gus giggling the whole time.  “Molly, come help me against these two.”  Molly rushed to Justin’s side and everyone engaged in the battle. Soon Brian snuck up and ‘captured’ Molly while Justin was at Gus’ side. Then in all the commotion, Brian snuck up on Justin and soon they were rolling in the snow. Justin pushed Brian onto his back and kissed him and as Brian rolled, pressing Justin into the snow, they were bombarded with snowballs that Molly was handing to Gus as fast as she could make them.  Soon Gus ran, giggling, with a snowball in each hand toward his dads and threw them at the same time.  He ended up tripping and falling between them and Brian and Justin immediately started dropping snow on him.  His laughter was contagious.  Molly walked over and Justin tossed her into the pile.

“Incoming,” Jenn’s voice surprised them all.  She lowered Aaron into the pile and soon he was in the mix of all the entertainment. “I’m going to get a little something together for dinner.”

Fifteen minutes later everyone entered the house, dropping wet coats onto the floor.  After getting Gus out of his snow pants and putting Aaron into his highchair. “We will be back down in a couple minutes, Mom.  We need to get into dry clothes.” Justin said as he grabbed Brian’s hand and they ran upstairs.

“Get out of those pants,” Justin said as he pulled off his own and braced himself against the back of the love seat.  He spread his legs far enough that Brian could enter him easily. It was fast and forceful and as soon as they had both cum, they quickly dressed. 

As they reached the door, Brian pulled Justin against him,  “Damn, I love my life!” He kissed him and they walked down the steps together.  

The rest of the evening they just wound down.  They watched a Christmas movie all together as they ate some popcorn all snuggled on the sectional in front of the fireplace. Aaron was the first to fall asleep and then Gus. Jenn looked at Molly, “Let’s put the boys to bed and then get some sleep ourselves. I am sure you want to contact your friends and tell them about the day.”

Molly reached down and picked up Gus who was curled up on Justin’s lap, “Come here, Gus, time to go to bed,” Gus wrapped his arms and legs around her while Jenn picked up Aaron out of Brian’s arms.

“Thank you,” Brian smiled at Molly and Jenn  as he reached for Justin, and pulled him close. “Merry Christmas.”  As Jenn walked past the light switch she flipped it off, leaving them in the light of the Christmas tree and the fireplace. Brian leaned into the corner of the sectional and Justin laid against him half laying on Brian’s lap.  They sat like that a long time.  Kissing from time to time but both lost in their own thoughts.  “What are you thinking, Sunshine?”

“I was just thinking about the last two Christmases.  My dad spent an hour or two with me and brought a meal from some place and then he left me on his way to who the hell knows where.” He took a deep breath, “Could today have been any better?”

It doesn’t get much better than today. I spent the last 2 years with your mom and Molly.  Craig stopped by both years.  I bet he was on his way back from lunch with you and the fucker didn’t tell us anything.”

Justin felt Brian tense up, “Darling, he lost.  He is in prison and we have a perfect life.”

“Perfect? You were in the hospital a month ago.”

“Yes, but you were there with me. We have so much to look forward to.  I can’t believe how fast our boys are growing.”

“Maybe we should try to have another one,” Brian’s hand rested on Justin’s crotch.

Justin laughed, “You and I have a baby?”

“Well, there is no possibility but we could have fun trying,” Brian’s mouth came down on Justin’s as his hand moved into Justin’s pants.

“I don’t want the night to end but let’s go to bed.” Justin said as he sat up and together they moved upstairs.  They peeked in at Gus and found him in Molly’s arms in his bed.  They were both sound asleep.  After looking at Aaron they went to their own room.  “Brian, are you going to tell me where we are going for New Year’s Eve?”

“No, that would ruin the surprise.”  Brian kissed him resting one arm over Justin’s waist. “Goodnight, Sunshine.”

“Goodnight, Brian.”

Brian let Justin know they were leaving on the 28th.   Justin still didn’t know where they were going but Brian let him know he needed no special clothes as they would probably not see another person from the time of their arrival to the time they left. 

“What are you going to do? Lock me in a hotel room?”

“Would that be so bad?” Brian asked as he ran a hand down Justin’s back and rested on his bottom.”

“No, it wouldn’t. I’m ready if you are.”

“I am.” They had said goodbye to the boys when Jenn and Molly had taken them to their house earlier that morning.  They would stay there the first two days and then the boys would go back to Britan and Molly would stay with Tracy and the boys the remainder of the time.  Ronni would be around as well as Emmett and James so Brian and Justin had no worries about their boys.

Brian and Justin loaded their overnight bags and as they pulled out of the driveway, they saw the mailman pull away. “Brian, can you pull up to the mailbox? I’m expecting a package about a painting I am being commissioned to do.”  Brian pulled up so Justin could grab the mail and then they were on their way.  

Justin looked through the mail and flipped through the pictures that he had been looking for. As he set the pack on the back seat he noticed another small package and after seeing the return address, he tucked it into his bag.  

“Anything important in there?”

“Well, the pictures I was looking for.  I will be painting a portrait and they have included about a dozen photos for me to use. Are you going to tell me where we are going? Is it a long drive?”

“We’ll be there in time for a late lunch unless you want to stop for a quickie on our way.  Then we could pick something up before we get there.”

“Come on, Brian, Where are we going? I feel like I should know.” For the two hours they talked and anything but their destination.  As Brian pulled off a main road something clicked.  “Bri, are we going to Cynthia’s cabin? The one we stayed at when we got married?”

“Yes, we are.  It is extremely snowy, as you can tell and there is a chance we could get stuck there for an extra day or two.”

“Oh, Brian, that sounds perfect.  I can’t think of a better place to be alone with you. I feel like it has been months since we had more than a few minutes to just be alone. The next couple days are going to be perfect before the new year and new responsibilities. ”

“You are taking on a big project at the hospital.  Are you sure you are ready for that? I mean you have your commissioned paintings you are doing and the boys are always active.”

“Well, Gus will be going to preschool everyday now and Ronni can manage Aaron easily. I will only be at the hospital a couple mornings a week.”

“Sunshine, you aren’t doing this because of Anna Claire and Kevin are you?”  Brian reached over and took his hand, kissing the palm and then continued to hold it.

“Oh, no, I hope maybe I can get something from her but I can relate to the people there.  I mean after my attack I wanted my old life back.  I knew what I had been able to do and what I couldn’t do then.  I can see that in some of the people I have already met there.  I hope that my art projects for them help them find a way to express themselves.”

“Sunshine, if anyone can do that it is you.  And if Anna Claire has a lucid moment or two….” He removed his hand from Justin’s as the road conditions declined and he needed to focus.  They rode in silence the last few miles as Brian focused on the path.  

When they arrived at the cabin there was a spot for him to park and a path to the cabin.  There was about four feet of snow on either side of the walkway and even part of the porch was totally encased in snow and ice. Grabbing their bags, Justin followed Brian as the path was not wide enough for them to walk side by side.  They walked into the familiar house to find a fire roaring and the smell of something amazing wafting through the room.

“I don’t know what I am smelling but I am forever grateful to whoever made it,” Justin walked over to the kitchen area and found a note. “It looks like we can thank Cynthia’s uncle for the food.  He admits he didn’t make it but he has had the fridge and cupboards stocked with plenty of food for our visit. What we are smelling is beef stew. It is in the oven on low so we can decide if we want to eat first or….”

Brian placed a hand on either side of Justin on the counter and pressed his body against him as he brought his mouth to Justin’s ear. “I think we have enough energy to…” Justin was already unbuttoning his fly and Brian did the same on his own. As Brian’s teeth sank gently into Justin’s shoulder his cock sank into that glorious spot that was the very core of their physical love but he knew that Justin’s soul was the true heart of their relationship. As he began to move quicker, his mouth softened and then he removed it as he arched as he and Justin came at the same time.

Justin turned into Brian’s arms, “I love our family but they definitely have put a damper on spontaneous lovemaking.” They kissed and Justin said, “I think I have worked up an appetite now.” His hand ran over Brian’s ass. “I’m expecting some playtime myself later,” his hand rested there for a moment before Justin pulled up Brian’s pants.  “Later, damn that ass is perfect,” Justin shivered, “but I think we need to eat first.”

Brian and Justin ate the stew along with crusty rolls before they found their way to the sofa and they laid together and soon were talking about the boys. “I can’t believe how fast Aaron is growing. I wish we could slow that down. I want to enjoy every minute of his life.”

“Sunshine, are you saying you want another baby? We have never talked about it.”

“Not anytime soon but, if you are open to it, maybe in a couple years?”

“Can we just say it’s a possibility that can be broached at a later date?” Brian kissed him. “I am definitely not saying no.  We have perfect children, how could I not wonder what another would be like, and of course, how we would achieve this will be something to think through.”

As they lay in the warmth of the fire and each other’s arms, they drifted off.  They woke up as evening fell and so did the snow.  In the 45 minutes they had dozed the car had accumulated a couple inches of white fluff  and it did not appear that it would be slowing down any time soon.

“Let’s go look at what there is in the kitchen so we can decide what we will want later.  Then maybe we can,” Justin stopped as Brian stood and offered his hand.

“Then we can take a long hot soak in a tub and have a late dinner,” Brian completed his thought.

“That sounds perfect.”

The night was perfect and by the next day, Brian and Justin were glad they weren’t planning on leaving for a few days because they could barely see the car and the path that led to it was completely indistinguishable from the rest of the front yard. They listened to the forecast and heard they had the possibility of getting another six inches  over the next couple days.  

It had been a long time since they had that much time together.  For the next couple days they made love whenever the spirit moved and besides watching movies they even got out a jigsaw puzzle and started working on it.  Brian was soon bored and decided they needed to make a game of it.  Soon every time they put a piece of puzzle that had manmade items in it they needed to take a shot.  The puzzle was mostly nature but there were a few small homes in the background, not to mention a car and a boat here and there.  That slowed down the progress of the puzzle but soon they were going back upstairs to make love.

By New Year’s Eve, both Brian and Justin were more relaxed then they had been in months.  They had talked about so many things.  But there was something they hadn’t talked about yet. Justin and Brian had worked together planning what they would like for their dinner and as the afternoon turned to evening they sat on the sofa but Justin put a little space between them and turned to face Brian, Justin put one leg up on the sofa between them and reached for Brian’s hand.

“Brian, I think it is time we talk about your parents.  I guess mainly Father Kevin. I know you needed time to soak all that in but now, darling,” Justin reached and touched Brian’s cheek, “are you going to try to find him or are you going to just see if information surfaces?”

Brian’s face was relaxed but serious. He took both of Justin’s hands. “What do you think, Sunshine? Is it worth the effort? If he doesn’t want to be found, he won’t be.”

“But we are pretty sure he doesn’t even know about you.  Would he have a reason to be in hiding?” Justin questioned.

Brian pulled Justin closer, needing to be physically touching him. “Justin,what if I track him down and find out, he wants nothing to do with me.  What if I screw up his life? I don’t want him to suffer for something he wasn’t to blame for.  All he did was get drunk and go to Catherine’s house.”

“But Brian, if he is as kind as people have told us, don’t you think he would want to meet you? Doesn’t he have the right to know about you? Darling, You deserve to learn more about him.”

“You’ll be there, right, Sunshine? I don’t think I could do it alone.  I have had two shitty parents already.  I just don’t know if I could take the rejection….”

“Oh, Brian, of course I will be with you.  Did you actually have to ask?”

Brian kissed Justin.  “No, I know I can always count on you.  You are the one person who has never hurt me.”

“Oh, I don’t know if this is a good time for this or not but I totally forgot about it until just now.  I’ll be right back.”  Justin went up the stairs and came back down with an envelope in his hand.  “I totally forgot about this.  I’m not sure how I managed that.  This was in the mail we picked up as we left.”

“Oh, ya, I remember you sticking it in your bag.  All I know about this envelope is it came from your …. from Joan.”

“Shit.” Brian said softly as he glanced at it and then looked into Justin’s eyes.

“I should have thought of it a couple days ago.  I didn’t want you to look at it while you were driving and then I just thought we both needed time to unwind before looking at something that would cause more stress.  And then we were so relaxed I totally forgot about it.”

“Sunshine, you didn’t do anything wrong. All you did was try to protect me.  What’s in it?”

“I haven’t opened it.  It is addressed to me but I wasn’t going to open it without you.”

“Can we just leave it until tomorrow.  Tomorrow is a new year.  I think that is a good time to see what she has to tell us.  Who knows, she might be returning the Christmas card I am sure you sent her.”

“Actually I didn’t.  You know we dropped a gift off for her.”

Brian touched his cheek, “You are so kind.”

“It was all your, our, son’s idea. But you added pictures, didn’t you?”

“I did.  I want her to know how special pictures are to us and I am hoping she will share some of the pictures she has of you when you were a baby or small child.”

“I doubt she has more than a handful.”

“You might be  surprised.  If she had any feelings for your father she could have taken some, hoping to share them with Kevin.”

“You are giving her credit for having feelings.”

Changing the subject Justin said, “Tomorrow sounds like a great plan, now.” He leaned forward and pushed Brian back so he was leaning against the side of the sofa. He pulled down Brian’s zipper and reached in to pull out his cock.  Justin spent the next twenty minutes taunting Brian.  He ran his tongue along the underside following the vein that was there. His tongue darted over the head seeking the first drops of precum and then his tongue circled around and around.

“Oh, lord, Sunshine.  Please….”

“I am not done, my love.”

After a few more minutes, Brian grabbed Justin’s head and pressed it over his throbbing dick. It was only seconds before Justin was swallowing his offering. He then slid his body across Brian’s sensitive member up to Brian’s mouth and kissed him. “I love you, Brian. You are the most important thing to me in my life.  I love our boys but you are the keeper of my soul.  In the years I was missing you said you could feel me.  You just knew I had to be alive. Well, I could feel you, too, but I was told it was just wanting a lost love. “

“You know that was all a lie now, right?” Brian had adjusted so Justin could lay comfortable half on and half off of Brian.

“Of course I do. I think we should get dinner started. Then we can figure out what we are doing the rest of the evening. Bri, do you miss being with a bunch of people tonight?”

“Justin, the last two New Year’s Eves I spent in the loft alone. I drank until I passed out.”

“I am sure you had invitations.”

“I didn’t want to be anywhere trying to celebrate. What is that noise?” There was a low rumbling coming from somewhere.

“If we were in the mountains I would say it was an avalanche but I believe it is a plow.  I was hoping someone would come soon.  I miss the boys so much that I was hoping you might agree to leave tomorrow morning.  If we leave around 8:30 we can be home by noon.”

“I like that idea.  I miss them, too, you know,” Brian pulled Justin into his arms.

“Of course you do. I have loved our time without them but I didn’t realize I would miss them this much,” Justin kissed him and then together they went to the kitchen. 

By the time they had finished assembling dinner the road was cleared as well as the path and the vehicle.  “Well, as long as it doesn’t snow tonight, we should have no trouble getting out of here in the morning,” Brian commented as he carried the filled plates to the small table.  Justin followed with the bottle of wine and the glasses.   

As they ate dinner they talked about a variety of things, They had steak and scallops along with creamy potatoes and shaved Brussel sprouts. “This is just a little better than eating Chinese takeout from the box.” Brian said as he took a sip of wine.

“I have some fond memories of those nights.  They usually ended up with us making love on the rug or over the sofa.”  Justin stood and moved around the table.  Brian scooted back far enough that Justin could sit on his lap, facing him. “I hope, in 50 years, you and I will be spending the evening very much like this. You know, as long as I can kiss you anytime I want, I am a happy man.” Justin returned to his seat and they finished their meal. As Brian put the dirty dishes in the dishwasher, Justin started some music on his phone and played it through the cabin speakers.

Brian walked over and said, “May I have this dance?”

They spent the next hour in each other’s arms. They danced around the cabin, talking part of the time but most of the time they were comfortable just being in each other’s arms, no words were necessary to tell each other how they felt. They both knew this is where they belonged.  Around 10:30 p.m. they shared something sweet and then as the time drew closer to midnight they changed the music to nothing but slow, love songs. At 11:50, Brian opened a bottle of champagne and filled two glasses and then, with a glass in one hand and the other hand around each other.  They swayed to the music, kissing more than dancing by this point. With two minutes left, they turned on TV and did the countdown as the ball dropped and as the shout went out they clinked their glasses, took a sip, and kissed.

“I love you, Brian.  Thank you for rescuing me.”

“You are the one who rescued me.  I wasn’t living without you. My life started again the day you came down that long staircase  and trusted me enough to bring you home with me.”

They ascended the stairs and deliberately Justin first tugged off Brian’s shirt and then undid his fly and Brian stepped out of his pants.  Next, Brian did the same.  He tugged off Justin’s shirt and then he very slowly first undid Justin’s button and then every so slowly pulled down his zipper letting his knuckles brush Justin’s cock through the thin material of his briefs.  He took a sharp breath in and then Brian, slid his hands over Justin’s slim hips, taking his underwear down with them. 

Both men stood naked and together they stepped closer. “Sunshine, I want you to …”

“Lay down on your stomach, Bri.” Justin started at Brian’s neck and slowly worked his way down Brian’s body. He massaged his shoulders and worked his way down his spine, first with his hands and then his mouth.  As he got to Brian’s lower back, he groaned as Justin found a knot and worked it out and then he took in a sharp breath as Justin’s tongue worked its way between his cheeks and then sank it into him. When Brian asked for more, Justin positioned himself and entered Brian, slowly and steadily. They got into a steady rhythm and then, they both climaxed together.

After a short rest, Brian and Justin made love once more before falling into each other's arms in exhaustion.

“Good night, my love. Thank you for finding me and bringing me back where I belong. And, Brian, you and I will find Kevin and whether or not he is interested we will be alright.  Together we are always alright.”

“Life is perfect so anything more we can have will only add to the best life ever.” With that said, Brian pulled Justin close and they drifted off.

Brian woke around 7:00 a.m. and went down to make coffee and then brought up a cup for each of them.  “Hey, Sunshine,” he set both mugs down and kissed Justin. “If we want to be on the road on time.”

Justin sat up in bed and stretched before reaching for the cup next to him.  “What got you up so early?”

“I woke up about an hour ago.” He got back in bed so he could be partially under the covers. “I was thinking about Kevin.  I want to be very careful with that situation.  I don’t want to cause any issues for him.”

“Of course you don’t, Brian.  That isn’t what this is about.”

Brian took another swallow of coffee and set it aside as he reached for the envelope that came from his mother.  This is the other thing I couldn’t stop thinking about.  Will you open it, Sunshine?”

“You know you could open it.”

“Please, Sunshine.  I don’t know why this has me so nervous but, damn, that woman can even get me by sending you something.”

Justin kissed him and rested against Brian and the headboard as he took the envelope.  He opened and then stopped.  “Just remember, Brian, that no matter what she says in this envelope, it is nothing that can hurt you or me.”

“I know you’re right.  What is it?”

Justin reached in and pulled out a small sealed envelope in it. “Damn, she can’t make anything easy, can she?” He opened this envelope and reached in, pulling out a small stack of what he first thought were cards of some kind but then he looked at what he had in his hand and he looked at Brian, “Brian, look!” he said softly.  

Justin was holding a stack of pictures.  The top one they had seen before.  It was a picture of Jack holding Brian. Jack wasn’t a good father but he may have had a reason to be unhappy with his life.  Maybe that’s why he felt Brian owed him that extra money from time to time.  Then Justin put that one on the bottom and looked at the next and then the next.  They were chronological order from youngest up to about the age of ten.

“Bri, she sent them to me.  I talked to her more than once but it finally sank in and she took the time to get these together for us.” Justin kissed him again. He looked through the stack and found the one closest to Gus’ age.  “I knew Gus looked like you.  Look at this one.when you were about the same age as Gus is now.”

“He really does.” Brian agreed. “Can we shower and go home now?”

“Of course we can, Brian.”  Justin dropped the photos back in the envelope and the envelope in his bag.

An hour later they were pulling away from the cabin.  “I think we need to make a get away a regular thing. Maybe a weekend every three months.” Brian said as he pulled out onto the main road.

“That sounds perfect.” As they continued down the road, Justin reached back and pulled the envelope to look at the pictures that had been sent by his client but as Justin got a good grip he realized this wasn’t the right folder but since he had it, he decided he would look through them once more. As he pulled the pictures out of the envelope he noticed a small slip of paper stuck in the bottom of it.  Justin read what it said  and he got very quiet.

“Justin, what is it?”

“I found a note from your...from Joan.”

“What does it say?” Brian asked

“Brian, you have to remember that this is Joan.”

“I don’t expect anything from her.”

“The note says, ‘Brian - I will look for more’.”  Justin looked over at Brian, “You know what this means, don’t you?”

“She isn’t very organized?”

“Brian, she is willing to look.  If she is willing to take time to do this, maybe she will be willing to answer more questions soon.”

“She will never be a mother to me but maybe she will at least be a human being. And you know what? That is fine with me. I don’t expect her to answer any more questions and I have all the love I need. I have you and the boys.  We have wonderful friends and your family. I will do all I can to be the best person I can be. All I can ask for is to live this life with no remorse.” With that Brian lifted Justin’s hand to his mouth and kissed it as they moved toward the life they had created together.

Stay tuned for A Father’s Remorse