Chapter 1

Justin was humming along happily to the music that was playing on his iPod, looking at the painting in front of him which was nearly finished. He had been able to get some good work done on it today and was happy with the progress he had been making.

He had started the painting two days ago and was planning to use it in his next show which was scheduled at a gallery in New York early next year. With Thanksgiving and Christmas just around the corner though, Justin knew that he would be busy and wouldn't find a lot of time to paint, so he had been happy for the time he had been able to spend on the painting in the last two days.

It wasn't like he wouldn't have anything to show if he didn't finish any more paintings in time, but he always liked seeing where his creativity took him and right now he was really happy with this newest painting and felt really good about including it in the show. It was inspired by some of the beautiful flowers and colours he had seen on their honeymoon to Hawaii four months ago. A lot of paintings recently had been and it had amused Brian greatly when Justin had shown him some of his most recent creations and he had realised where Justin's inspiration had come from.

“When did you have time to even look at anything besides the bedroom?” Brian had joked, earning himself an outraged gasp from his husband.

“All those times I forced you to leave the villa? What were you looking at?” Justin had asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Your ass,” Brian smirked which only earned him a snort from the younger man.

“I should have known.”

“You really should have, Sunshine. How long have you known me now?”

“Too long,” Justin had replied, though his face had shown how happy he really was. He had smiled brightly as Brian had pulled him closer and had started kissing him and just thinking back to that made Justin blush now.

He couldn't believe how happy he had been in recent months. It wasn't like he hadn't been happy before, but ever since they had gotten married four months ago, he had just been that much happier. It had seemed liked being married had made him and Brian even more connected to each other and Justin couldn't really describe it, but he knew that they were even closer now than they had been before.

Being married to Brian had been amazing, just like being with Brian had been all this time and Justin still couldn't believe how life had turned out. Here he was, married to Brian Kinney, Kinney-Taylor now, they had three children, two of them their biological children that Brian had carried and after everything they had been through with Brian's cancer and everything concerning Luke's birth, Justin had never thought that they would make it this far. But they had, not the least because of how much Brian had changed and because of the amazing man he had turned out to be once he had allowed himself to stop caring about what other people thought about him and had allowed himself to just be a father and later on a partner.

Justin knew that he couldn't love Brian more than he did, he loved him with all his heart and always would, just like he loved their children. All three of them.

Yes, they had made it through some pretty bad times together, but – and that was what mattered to Justin – they had made it. They had made it together by holding on tight and now they had finally moved on to the good times that they had promised each other in their wedding vows. They had survived the bad times and were now enjoying the good times and the last four months, the last couple of years ever since Brian had beaten his cancer and Vicky had survived her early birth, had been great for their family.

Justin felt blessed to have Brian and his children at his side and as he looked back at the painting in front of him, he knew that he was one of the luckiest men alive. He was loved by his husband and his children, loved them back just as much and he genuinely loved his job, loved being able to just create whenever he felt like it and to create whatever he wanted without any pressure, knowing that even if he didn't create anything for a month or even longer, they would still be fine. Both he and Brian were doing very well financially, which gave him a sense of security he had never had when he had been younger and had just started out. Having it now made him even more grateful for how his life had turned out. He was a lucky man and in a position many other people on this planet would kill for.

As his smile widened, Justin forced himself to look away from his painting when he heard the doorbell ring. For a second he was tempted to ignore it, but knowing that he was the only one in the house, he sighed, putting away his brushes and quickly wiped his hands on a wet cloth he had lying on a small table close by.

He sighed as he heard the doorbell once again and made his way out of his studio. “I am coming,” he muttered to himself as he made his way down into the foyer.

Brian had promised to pick up Vicky from her playdate on his way back home from the office, but he knew that they wouldn't be home for about another half an hour and Luke was still at soccer practice and wouldn't be back home for another hour at least. Gus was in New York and wouldn't be back home for another couple of days when he would come home to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with his family. He was already on his Thanksgiving break, but needed a bit of time to finish some projects he had been working on and would only arrive in two days time.

As he made his way to the door, Justin wondered who it could be, knowing that he wasn't really expecting any visitors that day.

The doorbell rang once again, making Justin call out once more. “I am coming!”

A couple of seconds later he had made it to the door and opened it. “Sorry, I was in my studio,” he apologised as he opened the door and frowned when he saw a teenage girl standing in front of him.

She looked about the same age as Luke was, which was 15, though Justin wasn't really sure. With makeup and everything you never really knew. Maybe she was a year or two older, but she was definitely younger than Gus was, who was 20 now.

“Can I help you?” He asked politely as he looked at the girl in front of him. Something about her looked slightly familiar, but he couldn't quite place where he had seen her before. Or if he had ever seen her before at all. Maybe in some pictures? He wasn't sure, but he was sure that there was something familiar about her. She was rather short for her age, thin, had short dark hair and dark eyes and reminded him a bit of a pixie.

“I am looking for Gus Marcus-Peterson. Is he around?” She asked, meeting his gaze head on.

Justin frowned, not having expected that. Not because she had been asking for Gus, but because of the last name she had been using. Gus hadn't used that last name in a long time. Even when Justin had come back from New York Gus had already been called Gus Kinney and later when Justin had adopted him, he had taken the name Gus Kinney-Taylor, wanting to have the same last name as his siblings and his parents once they had gotten married and taken each others names.

“Gus? He's not here. He goes to university in New York and won't be back for another couple of days until Thanksgiving,” Justin informed her. As he was about to continue, he was interrupted by the young girl.

“Oh shoot! That sucks! You're Justin Taylor, aren't you? I think I remember seeing you in some pictures,” she said, smiling a friendly smile at him.

“Kinney-Taylor,” he corrected her automatically, before he registered the rest of what she had said. “Pictures? I am sorry, do I know you?”

“I think you used to babysit me when I was younger,” the girl informed him which only confused Justin more. “Me and Gus, whenever my mother was busy.”

Justin eyed her closely and suddenly something in his mind clicked. He suddenly realised why she looked familiar and why she would have asked for Gus by his old name and why she would have known Justin from pictures. “Your mother is Melanie Marcus?” He asked, feeling like he was in an episode of Twilight Zone because he sure as hell had not expected to ever be caught in this situation, not after what had happened between Brian, Gus and Melanie so many years ago.

“Yeah,” the girl sighed and the sigh sounded frustrated and angry. “I am Jenny Marcus. I am Gus' sister.”

Chapter 2

“Papa! Papa, we're home!” Vicky announced excitedly as she ran into the house from the garage where her father was just getting out of the car, mumbling to himself that it was a good thing they had no immediate neighbours or they all would know now as well. He followed his daughter into the house and smiled at her excitement as she went in search of Justin.

It was amazing how well Vicky had developed after the rough start she had had into her life, but now, at almost six years old, she was one happy, exuberant girl that absolutely adored her Papa. And himself. Brian knew that Vicky loved him to bits as well and she couldn't have made him and Justin happier than she did every day. Just like Luke and Gus did. He was really lucky with his three children and loved them all so much. They meant the world to him and always would. Just like his husband, who had helped him raise them all and had created this beautiful family with him.

“Sunshine, are you around?” Brian called out for his husband, wondering if Justin might still be stuck in his studio. He had mentioned earlier that he wanted to paint and when Justin got into one of his moods, he more often than not forgot about time and just created to his heart's content.

“Kitchen,” Brian heard the voice of his husband reply and he smiled when he saw Vicky immediately turn around from where she was about to head up the stairs to his studio and dart off towards the kitchen instead. Brian followed her, though at a much slower pace. Not that he didn't share his daughter's excitement about seeing Justin, but running? That wasn't his style.

When he made it into the kitchen, he saw Vicky in her father's lap, excitedly hugging him and greeting him. Brian's eyes then wandered to the young girl sitting at the kitchen table with Justin and he frowned, not having expected a visitor.

He walked over and gave Justin a quick kiss, raising an eyebrow at his husband when he nodded towards the girl. “I didn't know we were expecting a guest,” he said as he turned towards the girl.

“Brian,” Justin started and Brian could immediately hear something in his husband's voice that he didn't like. Nervousness and anxiety. “This is Jenny. Jenny Marcus.” Justin met Brian's eyes and gave him a meaningful nod as he went on. “Melanie's daughter.”

“Hi Jenny, I am Vicky,” Vicky immediately introduced herself, waving at the girl from her father's lap, a sunshine smile on her face.

“Hi Vicky,” Jenny smiled, enjoying the little girl's excitement. She had been smiling since the girl had stormed into the kitchen and then into her father's lap, so focused on greeting her father that she had probably only noticed her presence now when her other father had pointed out that there was another person in the room.

“Why don't you go and watch some TV while we talk,” Justin suggested to his daughter, nodding towards the living-room. “I'll come out and spend some time with you in a few minutes, okay princess?”

Vicky nodded, happy enough at the prospect of being allowed to watch TV on her own. She usually wasn't allowed to watch TV unsupervised, so she was really excited now. She happily made her way off her father's lap and into the living-room, her blond locks bobbing up and down as she went.

Once she had left the room and they could hear the sound of the TV being turned on, Brian immediately turned to Justin with a frown. “Okay, what's going on here?”

“Sit down, please,” Justin said calmly, taking Brian's hand as he pulled him down into the seat next to his. “Jenny came by earlier looking for Gus.”

“Gus?” Brian raised an eyebrow, not liking what he was hearing one bit. He turned towards Jenny, a question in his eyes. “What do you want from Gus?”

“Brian, it's okay,” Justin said calmly, running his hand up and down Brian's thigh in an attempt to calm down his husband. He knew only too well how much Brian hated Melanie and Michael and hoped that Brian's hatred for them wouldn't automatically move over to their daughter as well.

“Jenny only recently found out about Gus' existence and now she came here to see her brother.”

“What about your mom?” Brian asked as he looked at the girl and Justin was glad when he heard genuine curiousity but no anger in Brian's voice. “What does she have to say about you coming here and looking for Gus?” Brian could only imagine that Melanie would be anything but happy about that and he honestly wasn't sure how he felt about that.

“She doesn't know,” Jenny muttered, lowering her eyes and not looking at either man.

“What do you mean she doesn't know?” Brian asked, clearly looking for something more.

“Jenny ran away,” Justin supplied, giving Brian's thigh a squeeze before he shook his head slowly, giving Brian a silent warning to tread carefully where the girl in front of them was concerned.

Brian nodded in silent promise, as if to let Justin know that he wouldn't explode in front of the girl and would stay calm.

“How did you find out about Gus being your brother?” Brian asked next, not surprised to know that Melanie would have kept the news from the girl for the last fifteen years.

“I found some boxes with old pictures and documents in the attic and went through them. The pictures showed my mom with another woman and a small boy and... it also showed other people, including you two with either me or that boy,” she said as she nodded at Brian and Justin. “In the box with the documents I found several documents refering to Gus Marcus-Peterson, listing this address and reading them, I figured that we were siblings.”

Justin gave Brian's thigh another squeeze, this time in warning. Technically, Gus and Jenny weren't really siblings as they weren't blood related at all, but it wouldn't do to go into that now. Brian seemed to understand what he was implying and made no comment on that, but just nodded.

“Where does your mother think you are right now?” Brian asked her instead, not liking the idea of having to get involved with Melanie in any way whatsoever. He had hoped that he had seen the last of her all those years ago, but with her daughter now sitting in his kitchen, he realised that that hope was probably futile.

Jenny just shrugged. “I doubt she'll even notice that I am gone,” she said, her voice sounding strangely void of emotion.

“What do you mean?” Justin asked, looking at her from confused eyes. “She's your mother, of course she must notice that you're gone.”

“She's very busy with work,” Jenny started to explain and her tone of voice made it clear that that wasn't all there was to it. “She's working on a big case right now.”

“But still, she must know that you're not at home. She must notice that you don't show up for dinner,” he pointed out, not quite sure if he understood what she was saying.

“We don't have dinner together. She's... she's very focused on her work and... we don't spend a lot of time together. When she's busy with a case, we sometimes don't see each other for weeks.”

Justin could feel the anger rise inside of Brian and had to take a deep breath himself. He knew that Brian didn't think much of Melanie on the best of days, but hearing this certainly wouldn't help either man's impression of her. Both Brian and Justin were dedicated parents and had always made sure that their children came first. Their children had always been their priority and more than once their jobs had to stand back so they could focus on being parents first. Yes, they knew that they were lucky and in a financial position where they could afford to make the children their priority all the time, but even if that hadn't been the case, Justin knew that something like what Jenny had described wouldn't have happened in their family. Both Brian and Justin had had their fair share of bad parents in their own lives and had always known that they wanted to be better parents than they had had growing up. Neglecting their children for work in the way Jenny seemed to have been neglected by her mother would not have happened in their family.

“And who takes care of you?” Brian asked, hardly able to suppress the anger in his voice.

“I take care of myself. I always have,” Jenny shrugged. “My mom... she was never the maternal type or... like other mothers. Her career always came first for as long as I can remember and she always said that she had to work so much, so she could provide for me, so... I have always been very independent from a young age.”

Brian nodded, but didn't say anything else to that. Justin could hear by his breathing how angry he was and if he was honest with himself, he felt just as angry himself. How could anyone neglect their child like that?

“Do you have any other family around that takes care of you when your mom is working so much?” Justin asked next, not surprised at the answer he received.

“No, it is just me and my mom. Until I found the pictures and documents, I didn't even know that I had more family out there. She never mentioned anyone.”

“Not surprised by that,” Brian muttered, then sighed. “I am sorry, but... your mother and I... we have never been friends.”

“I figured as much,” Jenny replied, then shrugged once more. “If it comforts you, most of the time I can't stand her either.”

In fact it didn't and Brian just shook his head, before he turned to Justin. Justin nodded after they had a silent conversation with each other for a couple of seconds, then turned to Jenny again.

“Look, why don't you stay here for tonight? We have a couple of guestrooms and I am sure Vicky will love having another girl in the house. There isn't much we can do tonight, but tomorrow, we can try and see what we can do about this situation.”

“I really just want to see Gus and get to know my brother,” Jenny started, looking at both men. “I don't want to impose myself on you.”

“You are not imposing,” Brian immediately replied. “And at least we'll know that you'll be safe staying here.”

“Only if it's really not a problem,” Jenny said once more.

“No, it's not. Like Brian said, we'll know that you're safe here and it's no imposition.”

“Why don't you go and join Vicky in the living-room while we get started on dinner? Our son Luke should be home soon and he'll be famished after soccer practice,” Brian said, nodding towards the living-room where Vicky was still watching TV. “We can have dinner and then we'll show you the guestroom where you can stay.”

“That's very nice of you,” Jenny smiled, before she got up and left the two men on their own.

Once she had left, Brian ran a hand over his face and sighed. “I don't like this, Sunshine. Not at all.”

“I know,” Justin agreed as he turned towards Brian. “I think she's honest though. She really only seems to want to meet Gus.”

“Did she say anything about Michael or Debbie?” Brian asked, nodding when Justin shook his head in answer to his question.

“I am not sure she even knows about them. I don't think Melanie mentioned anything to her about the Pittsburgh family and she only seems to have found out about Gus by pure coincidence. She mentioned seeing pictures of Gus and what I assume to be Lindsay. She also mentioned that she had seen pictures of me with her and Gus and of you with Gus, so maybe she has seen Michael and Debbie, but doesn't really know who they are or that they live here as well.”

“How old is she now?” Brian wondered. “She can't be 18 yet, right?”

“I think she's 17. Gus was three when she was born, wasn't he?”

“God, I wish I had paid more attention, but at the time...,” Brian started, then stopped.

“Hey, it's okay,” Justin said quietly, before he leaned in and rested his head against Brian's. “We can figure this out tomorrow.”

“We have to inform Melanie. If Jenny's not of age yet,she has a right to know where Jenny is,” Brian sighed. “Not that she seems to care much anyway.”

“Hey, let me worry about that, okay? I don't want you to have to worry about dealing with Melanie. I'll deal with her.”

Brian chuckled and kissed Justin gently. “My knight in shining armour.”

“I thought that was you,” Justin smiled back, running his hand over Brian's back and neck, before he turned more serious. “I know that you and her never got on and that things didn't end well between you...”

“That's putting it nicely,” Brian muttered darkly, closing his eyes.

“She always had a soft spot for me. Let me deal with her, okay?” Justin whispered, giving Brian's neck a gentle squeeze.

“I doubt she'll still feel the same way now that you're married to the enemy.”

“I don't care. After what she did to Gus, she might as well consider me her enemy as well... God, can you imagine that she would be this neglectful with her own daughter?”

“She was always more focused on her career than her children. Even when Gus and Jenny were still babies,” Brian pointed out.

“How do you think Gus will react to this?”

“I honestly don't know. Sonny boy is strong and... he moved on from Melanie's disappearance a long time ago. I hope he'll be fine. He'll probably be happy to hear from Jenny again,” Brian guessed, though the crease on his forehead betrayed the worry he really felt concerning his son's reaction. “I just don't want him to get hurt any further.”

“I know, neither do I,” Justin agreed, pulling back and looking at Brian. “It's probably not right to feel this way, but I am rather glad that he isn't home yet. At least we can figure some things out before he comes home.”

“I know, I was thinking the same.”

Just as Justin was about to say something else, they heard the front door and knew that Luke was home as well.

Justin looked around, then sighed. “How about we order some takeaway. I don't really feel like cooking and I think we need to explain to Luke and Vicky who Jenny is and why she's here.”

Brian nodded in agreement, then got up. “I'll order some Chinese. How about you go and take the princess and talk to her and I'll speak to Luke? By the time dinner arrives we'll hopefully have made some sense of all of this.”

“Okay,” Justin agreed, getting up as well. “I love you,” he said before he leaned in and gave Brian a quick kiss.

“Love you, too,” Brian replied, before they were interrupted by Luke coming into the room.

“What's for dinner? I am famished,” he announced as he walked over and gave both his fathers a clap on the back in greeting.

“You always are. You are like a bottomless pit,” Brian chuckled, before turning away from Justin and towards his son.

“We'll have Chinese tonight. Your dad was just about to order it,” Justin announced. “We have a guest for dinner, but your dad will explain all about that to you once he's ordered the food. I'll check on Vicky and Jenny,” he finished, before he gave Brian's hand a squeeze and moved out of the kitchen.

“Jenny? Who is Jenny?” Luke frowned, looking after his father as he left the kitchen.

“I'll explain to you in a minute, okay? Just let me order dinner first,” Brian announced as he took his cell phone out of his pocket and dialled the number of their favourite restaurant.

Luke got himself a bottle of water from the fridge, then plopped down at the kitchen table with a nod. “Okay.”

Chapter 3

Brian sighed as he wrapped his arms around Justin's body, pulling him closer. “What an evening. Not what I expected when I left the office earlier.”

“I know,” Justin agreed, moving closer to Brian's body. “Can you imagine how shocked I was when I realised who she was, standing outside our door and ringing the doorbell?”

“Probably as shocked as I was when you told me who she is,” Brian muttered, running his hand over Justin's arm. “What are we going to do about Melanie?”

Justin took a deep breath before he chose his words carefully. They had asked Jenny for her mother's phone number earlier and had tried calling Melanie, but all calls, both to her home and her mobile phone, had only gone to voicemail or answering machine. Justin had left some messages for her on both, informing her that Jenny was staying with them and safe and could she please get in contact with him, so they could figure out a solution for their situation. By now, hours later, Melanie had not answered any of those calls. Something Justin knew had made Brian only angrier. He had heard Brian's angry mutterings of what if something serious had happened to Jenny and Melanie could not be reached. And he agreed. He couldn't understand how Melanie hadn't gotten back to them yet. What kind of mother would know that her daughter had run away, had left the state, had made her way to people she didn't know and would not call back? Or even show up? It made him angry as well and had made him wonder all evening what kind of mother Melanie had been to Jenny.

“I will try again tomorrow. I will also try to call her at work. Jenny gave me the name of the law firm she works for. Maybe I can get her there. And if not, I think we should ask Carl what to do.”

“Yeah, I agree. He will know how to handle this,” Brian nodded. “I just don't want to give her any chance to come after us for anything.”

“Like what?” Justin frowned, not sure he knew what Brian was talking about.

“Kidnapping or whatever,” Brian said quietly, before he closed his eyes against the memories that simple word brought back.

Justin looked at him sadly and ran a hand over his cheek. “I don't think it's kidnapping if she came here on her own. It's not like we took her away from her home against her will.”

“You know Melanie. She hates my guts and whatever she can accuse me of, she will,” Brian reasoned and Justin knew that he had a point.

“I really don't understand her, you know? How can she care so little for her own daughter? It's horrible. I feel so bad for Jenny.”

Brian nodded. Jenny had told them some more about her life with Melanie earlier and what it had basically come down to were years of neglect on Melanie's part where she had only cared about her work and career and had basically left Jenny to take care of herself. If Jenny's version of the story was true, of course, but so far they had no reason to doubt her, and the fact that Melanie didn't seem to have noticed her daughter's disappearance and hadn't replied to any of their calls so far supported what Jenny had told them.

“I always thought that... she had behaved towards Gus the way she did because he was my son, you know? I know how she felt about me and how she felt about me fathering him, so... I always felt like she treated him differently because he was my son and then after Lindsay... He wasn't her biological son, so I always explained it away like that, but with Jenny? It's almost like she only had her so she could say that she had done it all: The career, the baby, all of it, you know? Just like ticking a box in the game of life. I always hoped she would have treated Jenny better, but... It makes me so angry. I really want to wring her neck!”

“I know,” Justin murmured, cuddling closer to Brian. He knew how much Brian hated parents that neglected their children. He knew how much Brian hated parents that mistreated their children in any way or form and how he had no sympathy for anyone that treated a child badly. Not after everything he had gone through as a child himself and not after how much he had changed to become a great father. How much he had changed to become the exact opposite of what he had experienced growing up. And he had. Brian had broken the cycle and had become a great father. The best father any child could wish for. Definitely the best father their children could have wished for.

Justin leaned a bit closer and left a gentle kiss on his husband's mouth. Deciding not to dwell on the negative any longer, he tried to change the topic. At least a bit. “Vicky seems to really like her.”

Brian snorted, then looked at Justin from amused eyes. “Vicky is just happy to have another girl around.”

“She doesn't really understand why Jenny would be Gus' sister but not hers,” Justin said, meeting Brian's gaze. “I tried to explain it to her, but I don't think she really understood.”

“Yeah, I know. When I took her to bed earlier, she told me how happy she was to have a sister now as well. I tried to explain it to her as well, but she just said that Luke was Gus' brother and also her brother, so if Jenny was Gus' sister, why wouldn't she be her sister as well?”

“She's got a point. You have to admit that there's some logic to it,” Justin said, smiling at Brian. “It's hard to explain how Jenny is Gus' sister when they are not related by blood at all.”

“I'll try to talk to her tomorrow. I'll try to explain it to her again. For now I am just happy that she and Luke don't seem too bothered by Jenny's appearance.”

Justin nodded in agreement. “Yeah, I am sure it will be fine. I am more worried how Gus will take it, to be honest.”

Brian sighed. “It's been so long... And he has never mentioned her. I know that... when he was small and I had just had Luke, he always said how he loved that he was allowed to help with Luke and how he loved being able to feed him, how he loved being allowed to hold him. He was never allowed to do any of that with Jenny and they never really included him in raising her. It always felt like he had never really built a connection to her in the way he was allowed to do with Luke and... I wonder if that's why he never mentioned her when he grew up.”

“I guess we'll find out soon. In any case, I am glad he'll get to meet her here with us around. He won't be alone, he'll have everyone he loves around to support him. I think it'll help that it's happening here where we and everyone else can support him instead of her finding him in New York where he would have been on his own.”

“Yeah, I was thinking the same earlier,” Brian said quietly. “Looks like it's going to be one interesting Thanksgiving.”

Justin smiled ruefully. “At least we know how to deal with interesting by now.” He then leaned in and gave Brian another kiss. “We'll be fine.”

Brian nodded, knowing that Justin was right. On the grand scale of things, they had already made it through so much in their relationship, had dealt with so much drama together that this would hopefully just be a small blip on their radars.

***

“Okay, could you please just let her know that it's about her daughter and very urgent,” Justin said, sounding frustrated and slightly angry. He had been trying to call Melanie for an hour now, trying to call her home phone, her mobile and now her office where a less than pleasant secretary had been trying to get rid of him for several minutes now.

“As I said, Mr. Kinney-Taylor, Mrs Marcus is in a meeting and not to be disturbed.”

“But this is about her daughter Jenny. Surely you must be able to interrupt her meeting for an emergency concerning her daughter.”

“I am sorry, but she can't be disturbed under any cirumstances.”

“Not even when it's about the well-being of her daughter?” Justin felt his anger rise. “This is an emergency.”

“I will leave a message for Mrs Marcus and will ask her to get back to you once she has time,” the secretary replied stiffly.

“When will the meeting be over? I can try calling her again then,” Justin offered, trying to curb in his anger as well as he could.

“I am not at liberty to give out that kind of information. I will leave a message for Mrs Marcus and will ask her to get back to you when she has the time.”

“Okay, thanks,” Justin sighed, feeling absolutely defeated. “Can you believe her?” Justin angrily slammed down the receiver of the phone in Brian's home office and looked up at the older man who had been pacing in front of his desk, listening in to the call that Justin had put on speakerphone.

“What if Jenny was seriously injured and no one could get a hold of her?” Brian fumed, his face showing the anger he was feeling.

“I think we should get Carl involved and ask him for his advice. I don't know how many more messages I can leave on her voicemail without yelling at her,” Justin admitted honestly, meeting Brian's gaze with a question in his eyes. When Brian nodded in agreement, Justin called Carl and put the call on speakerphone as well.

Brian and Justin had given Carl a short summary of what had happened in the last 16 hours since Jenny had shown up at their place and to say that the older man was shocked was an understatement. It had taken a few minutes for him to get over the shock of finding out that Jenny had shown up at Britin and was this close when he and Debbie had worried about her fate for years. Much like them, the older man had been beyond angry at what he heard about Melanie's behaviour and Brian and Justin felt quite glad that Carl was in Pittsburgh at his house and not in Florida close to where Melanie was supposed to be. They both had a feeling that it wouldn't end well for the woman. Once he had calmed down enough though, he had given them valuable advice on how to handle the situation.

When Justin had suggested calling the police, informing them of what had happened and about them not being able to get in contact with Jenny's mother, Carl had reasonbly pointed out that every call they made to the police would be logged as a report and that local authorities in Florida would then most likely refer this report to the child protective services over there, starting an investigation into Melanie's neglect of her daughter. While neither man really had any problems with that, Carl pointed out what a move like that might look like to Melanie and what it might do to Jenny if she was in the end taken away from her mother and put into foster care. He suggested that it might be best to keep the authorities out of it for now and to talk to Melanie face to face to avoid that from happening.

After much deliberation, Brian and Justin agreed in the end, knowing that Carl was right. They wouldn't help Jenny by having her put in a foster home somewhere in Florida. And they could all imagine the wrath Melanie would bring down on them in return.

They decided that it would be best for Justin to go down to Florida and try to meet with Melanie in person. Everyone agreed that Brian was not the right person to make this trip as a meeting between him and Melanie would only end in a bloodbath. Carl offered to come along on the trip, but Justin assured him that he would be fine on his own.

While they still talked some more, Brian started looking for flights and got Justin the last seat on an early afternoon flight to Tampa that would have him arrive in Florida late afternoon, giving him enough time to make his way to Melanie's law firm. They were lucky that they had still gotten a flight. It was the Tuesday before Thanksgiving, so most flights were booked already.

Justin suggested that Carl should inform Debbie and that they should come over for dinner that night. He could only imagine how much she would love to see her granddaughter and his children always loved a visit by their grandmother. Carl liked the idea and promised that he would break the news to Debbie gently before they came over to Britin.

Once their call ended, Justin had about an hour left before he had to head to the airport. He spent that hour talking to Jenny, trying to get some more information about where Melanie worked and where they lived, informing her of what was going on. He also used the time to explain to Vicky and Luke why he would be leaving in such a rush, promising them that he would be back the next day and that their Thanksgiving was not in danger because of this unplanned trip.

When he was ready to leave, he and Brian kissed goodbye, he gave each of his children a kiss and a hug and then made his way towards the airport, starting on a trip into the unknown. A trip that nobody was sure how it would end and what it would bring.

Chapter 4

“I am sorry.”

Brian looked up from his desk in his home office and frowned when he saw Jenny standing in the door, hanging her head sadly.

“What for?” Brian asked, waving for the girl to come into his office and take a seat.

“It's my fault that Justin had to leave in such a hurry and … I didn't mean to cause any problems.”

Brian shrugged. “It's not really a problem and as far as I can see, you're not at fault for your mother not answering her phone or refusing to take our calls.”

Jenny sighed sadly. “She doesn't care. She never did. It's all about her cases and her career. She never cared if I was okay or needed anything...”

Brian could hear the bitterness in the girl's voice and could relate to that. He had felt the same about his own parents for the longest time and felt the pain that she was going through. “I doubt that. I am sure that deep down she loves you. She's your mother,” he said anyway, not wanting to hurt the girl anymore by saying what he really thought of her mother.

Jenny met his gaze and smiled. “I know that you don't like her. You don't have to lie for my benefit. I know that I've always been a millstone around her neck and nothing more.”

Knowing that he wasn't dealing with a young child, but a teenager that was the same age Justin had been when they had met, he nodded, carefully thinking about what he wanted to say next. “You're right. Your mother and I... we never really got along and things happened in the past that... let's just say I don't have a high opinion of her. And I know all about parents that are neglectful and don't care about their children. It sucks. I am not going to lie to you. It sucks, it hurts and even though you might not believe it: It's not your fault! It's her fault.”

“You know?” Jenny just asked with a raised eyebrow, wondering if she had understood correctly.

Brian nodded, before he took a deep breath. “My parents weren't good parents. Quite on the contrary. As far as bad parents go, they are right at the top. I had to learn the hard way how to take care of myself and how to make sure that I would still be able to achieve anything in life. So yeah, I know what you're going through and... I know it seems that way, but you're not alone. You came here and you have a whole family here that is only waiting to get to know you. And if I know them at all, I know that they will be there for you and will support you in whatever way they can. I know that Justin and I will.”

“But you're not my family,” Jenny replied sadly. “You're Gus' fathers, but you have no responsibility where I am concerned.”

“It's not about responsibility. You are our son's sister, yes, but even more than that...,” Brian stopped and eyed Jenny with a questioning gaze. “Did your mom ever tell you anything about your family? About your father?”

He knew that he had to tread carefully and he also knew that it wasn't really his place to tell Jenny about her family history, but with Debbie coming over, he knew that he needed to prepare her a bit and needed to explain some of their family's history. Whether Melanie wanted her to know the truth or not.

Jenny shook her head. “No, until I found the documents in the attic with Gus' name and your name I always thought it was just my mother and me. I figured she must have gotten pregnant from an anonymous sperm donour or something, but we never really talked about it. And then... I saw all these pictures. Family pictures, so... I think what I assumed so far could be wrong.”

Brian nodded slowly in understanding. “Actually, it is. Your mom didn't use an anonymous sperm donour. She and her partner at the time, who is in fact Gus' mother, decided to have a friend donate his sperm.”

“That would be Lindsay Peterson, right? I saw her name in some of the documents.”

Brian forced himself to take a deep breath, trying to push away the memories the mention of Linday's name brought. He nodded slowly. “Yes, Lindsay and your mother had been together for years. And at one point they wanted a child. At the time your mother couldn't have children, so Lindsay decided to carry the child. She and I had been friends since college and... she insisted on me being the father which caused a whole lot of trouble with your mom because she already hated me back then. But in the end they went ahead anyway and Lindsay had Gus. She and your mom were supposed to raise him, but... they hadn't counted on me loving my son and wanting to be a part of his life as well, so... tensions ran high...”

Jenny listened intently, quite intrigued by finally finding out more about her history.

Knowing that he had the girl's full attention, Brian went on. “After some time, Melanie had some procedure or other done, don't ask me about the details, because I don't really know and suddenly they announced that they wanted to have another child, this time with her carrying the child. They settled on Michael as the father. He was my best friend at the time.”

“Michael?”

“Michael Novotny. We were all part of the same group of friends and your mom got pregnant with you shortly after. They had you, but... things were problematic between your mom and Gus' mom and they split up, got back together... It was a mess, to be honest.”

“Is that when you took Gus away from them to live with you and Justin?” Jenny asked curiously.

“No,” Brian shook his head in reply. “Things happened, they worked it out and in the end they moved to Canada with you and Gus.” Brian took a breath, not quite sure how much he should explain to this girl that he hardly knew. “At the time Justin and I went our separate ways as well and I had no intention of being a full time father to Gus. Not at the time, but... things changed. Lindsay... she tried to kidnap our son Luke and when shit hit the fan and she got arrested, your mom stopped me from seeing Gus. She blamed me for what Lindsay had done and thought she could punish me by keeping me from seeing Gus.”

“She kidnapped Luke?” Jenny's eyes had widened to comical proportions. “That's fucked up.”

“It was,” Brian agreed, not wanting to go into further detail.

“Why did my mom think it was your fault?”

Brian shrugged. “She was always jealous of my friendship with Lindsay and I guess she had a point that Lindsay had an unhealthy obsession with me, though... I am gay, always have been, that should have given her a hint that we would never have been a happy family. Things went bad after Lindsay was sent to prison and your mom stopped me from being able to see Gus. So I got myself a lawyer and in the end I got custody of him. Your mom didn't take that too well and stopped all contact with anyone in Pittsburgh. She took you, left Toronto and we never heard from her again. Until you showed up here.” Brian met the girl's gaze and saw her take in everything he had said. He knew it was a lot to take in, but he had always believed in honesty and at 17 years old, he hoped that she was old enough to understand everything.

“What about my father? Did he try to stay in contact with me?”

Brian sighed, knowing that this question would have come up sooner or later. He knew that the answer would hurt the girl, but he hoped that she would be strong enough to make it through that.

“Jenny,” he started, leaning forward to look at the girl from warm eyes. “Your father... he was part of the ploy to kidnap Luke. He helped Lindsay and was also sentenced to prison.”

“He what?”

“I know this is hard to stomach, but I think you deserve the truth. And I need you to understand these things before you meet the rest of your family here. Michael... he helped Lindsay and he went to prison as well and after he was released... the last we heard he lived in California, but... I have to admit that I couldn't care less.”

“I...,” the girl looked utterly shocked and the colour had visibly drained from her face. “I don't know what to say... Why are you so nice to me?”

Brian frowned, not quite sure he understood. “Why not?”

“All you've told me is how my father tried to kidnap your son, my mother tried to keep you away from my brother and basically hates you and... yet here you are, being so nice to me. I mean... Justin even left to try and see my mother when really you should have kicked me out the minute I came here.”

Tears started to run down Jenny's face and Brian cursed himself for maybe having said too much.

“Jenny... you are not responsible for your parents' actions. You are your own person and you haven't done anything wrong as far as Justin and I are concerned. Quite on the contrary. Of course we would be nice to you. You are Gus' sister.”

“I should leave,” she suddenly announced as she got up from her seat and moved towards the door. “I have already caused you enough trouble.”

“Jenny, please,” Brian started, getting up as well. “Don't you want to meet your brother? The rest of your family?”

Brian watched as Jenny turned around and looked at him from sad eyes. “What family? My mother is a bad person, my father is a bad person...”

“But you're not. You seem like a great girl from all we have seen so far. You seem smart, proactive, brave. Hell, you came all the way here on your own without knowing what you'd find, just so you could see your brother. Don't you want to at least wait until he's home and you can get to meet him?”

“Does he even want to see me?” She asked, looking at Brian from sad eyes.

“I am sure he wants to. I... I can't tell you how he will react and I will be honest, Gus... he hasn't always had a good and easy time with your mother, but... I am sure he will also know that you are not your mother and not responsible for her actions and I think he would really like to meet you,” Brian said, not sure if he was right, but knowing Gus and hoping that this would be his reaction anyway.

“I still think I should leave. I should go to a motel or something until he comes back.”

“Jenny, stay, please! Justin will have my ass if he comes back and finds that you're gone because of something I said. He used to babysit you a lot when you and Gus were small and he cares about you a lot,” Brian said, knowing very well how angry his husband would be if he came back only to find that Jenny had left because of Brian's big mouth. “And I don't even want to imagine how Debbie will react.” He actually shuddered then.

“Debbie?”

Brian nodded, then looked at Jenny from sincere eyes. “I guess this is what I really wanted to tell you, but I went about it the wrong way, I think. I am not good with words which everyone who knows me can attest to and I am sorry if I said too much, but... Debbie... she's Michael's mother, your grandmother. She has always been my surrogate mom and a second mom to Justin as well and she's a grandmother to our children, just like her partner Carl is a grandfather to them. And as she's Michael's mother, she's your biological grandmother.”

“I have a grandmother?” Jenny's eyes widened at that bit of news.

“Yes and she's coming to dinner later. She's been devastated after your mom left Toronto with you and no one heard from her again. She always cared about you and worried so much about how you were doing. If I know her at all, she's probably driving Carl up the walls right now, demanding to come out here right now and not to wait until dinner.”

Jenny actually moved back to the seat she had occuppied earlier and flopped down. “Wow...”

“I know your mom never told you, but you have a family here. Your brother, your grandparents... uncles...Well, not really biological uncles, but we all kind of became our own family when our biological families abandoned us for one reason or another... They are my children's uncles and they were yours as well when you and your moms still lived here in Pittsburgh. They will be ecstatic to meet you, Jenny.”

“I don't know what to say,” Jenny muttered, hiding her face in her hands.

Brian walked around the desk and leaned against it, squeezing Jenny's shoulder. “I know it's a lot to take in and... I know it will be even more to take in once you meet them, but Justin and I thought you might like to meet your family and that you would like to get to know them as well as Gus.”

Jenny stayed silent, but nodded slowly after a while.

“I know I probably could have gone about this a different way, but... I guess I just wanted you to know the history before you meet these people. Tonight, your grandparents will join us for dinner if that's okay with you. If not, just say the word and I'll tell them to stay away.”

Brian watched the girl, wondering if maybe he had thrown too much information at her at her age. Maybe he had said too much and the wrong things. Really, this was what Justin was good at, not him, but with Justin on his way to Florida, it had been left to him to fill her in and maybe he had given her too much information in too short a time.

After the longest minutes of silence between them, Jenny looked up at Brian and met his gaze. She wiped away the tears on her face and nodded. “I would love to meet my grandparents. I never even knew I had any...”

“I know it's a lot to take in and... just to warn you, especially Debbie is a lot to take in when you first meet her, but believe me, she has the biggest heart. She will be so happy to know that you're well and here and she will spoil you ridiculously. You couldn't ask for a better grandmother. Gus, Luke and Vicky love her and I am sure you will come to love her as well once you get to know her,” Brian assured the teenage girl.

“I can't believe that you're doing all this for me...”

“You're family. It's what you do for family,” Brian said, before he squeezed her shoulder once more. “I know what it's like to feel alone and like no one loves you and cares about you and... really... Debbie was the first person to show me what it felt like to have someone care about you. It's a lot to take in, but if you want, you'll always have a family here in Pittsburgh from now on.”

“Thanks,” Jenny said, her voice sounding sincere. “I... I never had a family before and... I don't know what to say...”

Brian nodded, before he walked away from the desk and towards the door. “It's a lot to take in. Take all the time you need and... if there's something you want or don't want, let us know. Justin and I are here to help in whatever way we can.”

“Thank you,” Jenny said once again, watching as Brian opened the door.

“I should probably check on Vicky. She has been suspiciously quiet for a while now. You just take all the time you need, okay?”

Jenny nodded, then watched as her brother's father left his office and gave her some peace and quiet to come to terms with everything she had been told by him.

***

“Sunshine, did you see her?” Brian asked as he picked up the phone and saw Justin's name on the caller ID.

“No,” Justin muttered angrily. “By the time I made it to her office she was already gone and the office was closed. When I made my way to her home, she was nowhere to be found. I left more messages, but Brian, what is wrong with her? Her daughter has been missing for at least two days and she doesn't seem to care...”

“Hey, take a deep breath. I can hear how agitated you are,” Brian said as he took a deep breath himself, feeling quite angry himself.

“It just makes me so fucking angry. Jenny could be dead, lying in a ditch somewhere and... it's just so wrong. She seems like such a nice girl and to be treated like that by her own mother...”

Brian could hear how Justin was talking himself into a rage and he understood exactly how his husband was feeling. He felt the same. “She's got us now. At least she found us and made it to her family here.”

“I know, but...,” Justin sighed, then took a deep breath. “Are Debbie and Carl there already?”

“No, they should be here any minute. I am actually quite surprised that Carl was able to keep Debbie away for as long as he did,” Brian was chuckling at that point and was happy when he heard Justin's amusement as well.

“Did you prepare Jenny for meeting Debbie?” Justin asked next, his voice sounding more serious and concerned now.

“I tried, but it's Debbie,” Brian said. “How do you prepare someone for that?”

“Brian,” Justin sighed. “That's not what I meant...”

“I know... and yes, I did... I tried to explain to her about Michael and Lindsay and the family here as well as I could.”

“How did she take it?”

“As well as could be expected, I think. She seemed okay, but... it's a lot to take in. And you know me, I am not good in these situations. I think it would have been better for you to talk to her.”

Justin could hear the doubt in Brian's voice and didn't like it one bit. Brian always put himself down when in fact Justin was sure that he had done just fine with Jenny. “I am sure you did great, Brian. And... I think it was better that you told her... I mean... I wasn't even there when most of it happened and Michael and Lindsay were more your friends than mine.”

“Yeah, but you are better at dealing with these situations. She cried... she fucking cried,” Brian muttered, running a hand over his face.

“I hope you didn't react like that when she did,” Justin snorted, knowing fully well how much Brian hated to deal with emotions and even worse than dealing with his own emotions, dealing with other people's emotions.

“Come on, you know me better than that...”

“I do, which is why I have no doubt that you did just fine,” Justin said seriously.

Not wanting to dwell on his earlier conversation with Jenny any longer, Brian changed the topic. “What will you do now?”

“I'll stay here at their home for a while longer. Maybe Melanie will come home soon. If not... I guess I'll try her office again tomorrow before I fly back. Brian, what do we do if I don't get to talk to her?”

Brian sighed. “I guess we'll have no choice but to call the authorities then...”

“Yeah,” Justin sighed as well. He was about to go on when he heard the doorbell in the background. “Debbie's there?”

A second later they could hear Vicky's excited voice calling out. “Daddy, Grandma Debbie and Grandpa Carl are here.”

Brian chuckled. “Yep, I guess they are.”

“It will be fine, Brian. At least Vicky seems excited.”

“She is your daughter. She's always excited, Sunshine,” Brian snorted as he slowly made his way towards the foyer where he could hear Vicky talking excitedly to her grandparents.

“One of the many things you love about her,” Justin said wisely, knowing that it was true.

“Of course,” Brian agreed, before he arrived in the foyer. “Sunshine, I'll call you back later when they're gone, okay?”

Justin nodded, even though Brian couldn't see him. “Okay. I love you.”

“Love you, too!”

He then hung up and made his way over to welcome Debbie and Carl as well.

Chapter 5

“Hey princess, why don't you let go of your grandparents and see where Luke and Jenny are? Tell them that Grandma Debbie and Grandpa Carl are here,” Brian said as he walked over to where Vicky was talking a mile a minute in her best Taylor fashion.

“Okay, Daddy,” she exclaimed happily, before she ran off and up the stairs to the second floor of the house.

Brian watched after her with a smile on his face before he turned towards Debbie and gave her a hug. “You okay, Ma?”

“Why didn't you tell me before, asshole? Carl said she came here yesterday?” Debbie immediately started, but stopped when Carl put a hand on her shoulder.

“Debs, remember what I told you? Everyone is still trying to figure out what the best way is to deal with Jenny showing up here.”

Debbie sighed, before she looked at Brian from contrite eyes. “I know... It's just, it's been so long. I've wondered for years how she was doing and where she was and now she's here and...”

“So are you,” Brian said as he let go of Debbie and nodded at Carl in greeting. “It's a difficult situation.”

“Carl said Sunshine has gone to Florida to see Melanie?” Debbie asked as she looked from Brian to Carl and back.

“Yeah, but he hasn't had any luck so far. I just spoke to him, but he missed her at her office and she doesn't seem to be at their home.”

“God, what's wrong with that woman? Jenny could be hurt, could be dead... How can she not care?”

“That's the big question,” Brian sighed, before he led everyone into the kitchen. “Are you guys okay with Italian? I thought I could order something so there'll be more time for talking.” He made a face as he said the 'more time for talking' part which actually made Debbie chuckle.

“Honey, how long have you known me?” She then turned to Carl. “Would you mind getting the food, Carl?”

The older man nodded and turned back towards the main door of the house.

“You cooked?” Brian raised an eyebrow, amusement dancing in his eyes.

“It calms me down, so shut up!” She then left her handbag on the counter and turned towards him. “And my granddaughter will not eat any takeout food when there are family recipes she has no idea about.”

“How many hours on the treadmill is this gonna cost me?” Brian asked, but never got a reply as they were interrupted by the children arriving in the kitchen.

“Hi Grandma Deb,” Luke immediately came over and greeted her with a hug and a kiss.

“Hi, baby Sunshine. God, you look more and more like your father...,” she smiled at the boy who with his blond hair and blue eyes indeed looked a lot like Justin.

Luke made a face. At the age of 15 there were worse things to hear from your grandmother, but also better ones. And it wasn't like she didn't tell him every time she saw him which amused his fathers to no end and slightly annoyed him. Gus had once told him that now he finally knew what it felt like to be him, because everyone always pointed out how much he looked like Brian, so it was only fair that Luke had to suffer the same fate.

He then moved aside to make space for Jenny who had stayed a bit behind watching the interaction from curious eyes.

“And God... Jenny... honey...,” Debbie breathed out as her eyes settled on her teenage granddaughter who was still hanging back as Luke and Vicky went off to help their grandfather carry the food into the house. “It's so good to see you...”

“Hi,” Jenny said shyly, not quite sure how to react or what to do. “It's nice to meet you, Mrs Novotny.”

“Mrs Novotny? God, it's Grandma Debbie or just Debbie or Debs or whatever, but no Mrs. Novotny. Come here, honey,” Debbie said as she opened her arms to her granddaughter.

Jenny threw a glance at Brian who just shrugged and muttered something which sounded suspiciously like 'I tried to warn you'. In the end she went ahead and went into the waiting arms of her grandmother who immediately engulfed her in a crushing hug.

After her talk with Brian earlier that day, Jenny had spent some time with Luke who had told her a bit about their family and Grandma Debbie in particular. He had also jokingly warned her about Debbie and how she could be a bit much at times, but even despite that Jenny had felt immediately how much both the boy and his sister loved their grandmother and were looking forward to her visit. Both seemed to adore their grandmother and if their stories were anything to go by, Grandma Debbie was a loud, big woman with the biggest heart you could imagine. And she gave crushing hugs that took your breath away which Jenny now experienced for herself as she was held close by the woman.

“Debs, honey, let her go. You're probably scaring her to death,” the amused voice of an older man interrupted their embrace and actually made her grandmother let go of her.

“Oh shit, I am so sorry. I am just so fucking happy to see you. It's been so long...,” her grandmother immediately started to apologise when she pulled back.

“It's okay. I am fine,” Jenny immediately assured her with a smile. That hug had actually felt nice and she had a feeling that she might come to like this woman as much as Luke and Vicky seemed to do as well.

Once all the food had been put away on the counter, not without Brian looking at it in horror and asking how many armies Deb intended on feeding, Carl turned towards Jenny as well.

“Hi, I am Carl. It's good to see you, Jenny. Not that you'd remember me, but well, you know?” He said as he held out his hand and shook hers in greeting. Even though he had been with Debbie for more than 17 years now, he had never taken up her habit of just hugging everyone and everything. He had always been more reserved than that.

“Hi,” Jenny replied with a smile before she turned and looked at all the food in awe. “What's that?”

“Oh, I prepared dinner for us and I wasn't sure what you liked so I prepared several dishes,” Debbie said, before she made her way over to the counter. “There's Lasagna, there's Baked Ziti, there's tuna casserole and because I didn't know if you were some vegetarian or something, I also prepared some vegetable lasagna and salads.”

“Wow,” Jenny said, clearly impressed by the spread in front of her. “I can't remember the last time I had a homemade meal...”

“Doesn't your mother cook for you, honey?” Debbie asked, looking at her granddaughter from inquiring eyes. The tone in her voice made it clear what her thoughts were on that.

“No, she's too busy. She works a lot,” Jenny said, her voice clearly sad. “She's not really maternal in the sense of the word.”

Debbie grumbled, making it obvious to everyone around what she thought of that. “Well, you're here now, honey, so you better get used to some homemade meals. No granddaughter of mine will eat takeout food when I can cook for her.”

Before Brian even got the chance to reply anything to that, Debbie held a finger in his face. “And you won't complain, you hear me?”

“Didn't dream of it,” Brian said, making a zipping motion with his fingers over his mouth, indicating that he would be quiet.

“Good,” Debbie said, before she turned towards the food and started unwrapping dishes. “Now come and help your grandmother, honey. Tell me what you'd like to eat tonight.”

Knowing that they had basically been dismissed, Brian took a beer for himself and Carl and ushered him and the children towards the living-room, giving Debbie and Jenny some time to get acquainted.

***

“How did dinner go?”

“Good. Debbie is ecstatic and from what I could tell, Jenny seems to like her as well. They decided to spend the day together tomorrow. Debbie wants to show her more pictures and stuff from when she was a baby.”

“That's good,” Justin said as he flopped down on the king size bed in the hotel room. “That makes me happy for Jenny. She deserves to know that she has a family that actually loves her.”

Brian could easily hear the frustration in his husband's voice. “I take it from your cheery tone that you weren't successful?”

“I waited outside her house for three and a half hours, but she didn't show up. I really don't know what's wrong with her.”

“I have some ideas, but I am sure you're not interested in hearing them,” Brian offered as he sat down on the side of their bed in the master bedroom.

Debbie and Carl had left about an hour ago and the kids had all gone to bed. Brian had just checked on Vicky who was sleeping peacefully and was ready to turn in for the night himself.

“It just makes me feel so bad for Jenny,” Justin sighed. “And to think that I am missing a night in your arms for her and this shit...”

“I miss you, too, Sunshine,” Brian said quietly. “So do the kids.”

“Vicky you mean,” Justin laughed. He was realistic enough to know that Luke at 15 years old was old enough to survive one night without his father in the house. Vicky however was a different story. There hadn't been many nights where she had been without one of her fathers and she missed him terribly. He had heard it earlier when she had called him to say goodnight.

“Apparently you're the only one that can do her hair right. Whatever it is you do, my skills don't seem to even come close to it,” Brian said with amusement in his voice, remembering how he had brushed her hair earlier and how she had complained over and over again about the way he had done it.

'No daddy, not like that. You have to do it the way Papa does', she had said over and over again. Brian seriously hadn't known that there were so many things you could get wrong when doing your daughter's hair.

Justin chuckled, knowing fully well how particular their daughter could be over her blond locks. “I am sure you tried your best.”

“I did and it seems that in the end the final result was good enough for one night though she made it clear that you're on hair duty again tomorrow and I am back to storytelling.”

“I can live with that,” Justin agreed, a smile dancing on his lips. “I miss you, you know? I mean it's only one night, but... I wish I was home and not stuck here.”

“I wish you were home. God knows doing these things in person with you are more fun than doing them over the phone,” Brian said his voice taking on a husky tone.

“Hmmm, I wonder what things you are talking about,” Justin played along, knowing where Brian was taking their call now.

And indeed the next half an hour turned out to be the best half an hour of his otherwise frustrating day.

***

“Could you please let her know that I am still waiting to see her?” Justin politely reminded the secretary outside Melanie's office that had made him wait for more than 30 minutes now.

“I told you, Mr. Kinney-Taylor that Mrs Marcus is very busy and since you don't have an appointment...”

“I am not here as a client,” Justin explained once more, trying to stay calm. God, this woman had to be the most frustrating person on the planet ever. He had been over this with her at least three times now. “I am here concerning an issue with her daughter. Could you please tell her that it's urgent and about the wellbeing of her daughter?”

“Mrs Marcus is in the middle of a meeting.”

“And can't spare five minutes concerning the wellbeing of her daughter?” Justin asked in disbelief. “What if she was injured or hurt?”

“Mr Kinney-Taylor, you said yourself that she's not, so I am sure that whatever you need to talk to Mrs Marcus about can wait a bit longer until she has the time.”

“You know what? No, it can't! It's waited for two days now and I am done waiting,” Justin announced as he walked past the secretary and unceremoniously made his way into Melanie's office.

He heard the shocked secretary call after him and knew that she was following him, but he couldn't care less. He had waited long enough and if Melanie thought that she could avoid him or make him wait until he lost his patience, well, she had won. He had lost his patience and wouldn't wait any longer.

As he entered the office, he saw her sitting behind a large desk. When she looked up, their eyes met and Justin couldn't help but notice how they seemed to soften a bit when they settled on him.

“Justin,” Melanie exclaimed in surprise as she got up. She had aged well, Justin had to give her that. She was still thin and had let her hair grow out which made her face and features seem a lot softer than Justin was used to.

“Melanie,” he said as the secretary also made her way into the office.

“Mr Kinney-Taylor, I told you...,” she said, clearly outraged by the fact that he had just walked into the office like that.

At the mention of his full name, Melanie's features hardened and she nodded towards the secretary. “It's okay, Tina. Leave us alone and make sure we're not disturbed.”

The secretary looked from Melanie to the man who had just stormed into her office and then left with a nod. “If you wish.”

Once the door had closed, Melanie was the first one to speak. “Kinney-Taylor...,” she said, nearly spitting out the Kinney part of his last name. “Who would have thought?”

“I am not here to discuss my private life with you. I am here concerning Jenny,” Justin just announced, not rising to her bait.

“There is nothing to discuss,” Melanie said as she sat down in her chair once more.

“Did you get any of the messages I've left in the last two days?” Justin asked, clearly outraged by her obvious dismissal.

“As you can see, I am very busy. I didn't have time to check my messages yet.”

“I've left you nearly 40 messages! I even left messages here with your secretary. Don't act like you haven't gotten any of them.”

“I am working on a big case right now. Tina knows better than to disturb me,” Melanie announced as she turned back to the file on her desk that she had been looking at when Justin had entered the office.

Justin slowly got an idea and hoped that he was wrong. “When's the last time you have seen Jenny?”

“Why would that be any of your concern?” Melanie asked, not even looking up from her file in front of her.

“Are you telling me you don't know that your daughter has been gone for at least two days? Maybe even more?”

“Gone? JR is at home,” Melanie announced, looking up and meeting Justin's gaze. “Not that it's any of your concern.”

“Oh, it is my concern. She is at home alright. My home!” Justin announced, not even pretending that this conversation was over and instead moving over to the desk and sitting down in one of the chairs in front of it. “She has been staying with us for two days now.”

“Us?” Melanie frowned, for the first time not sounding as sure anymore as she had before.

“Brian, me and our children.”

“Children... So you actually went back to him and bent over for him again... Even after what he did to you...I always thought you had a backbone, but I guess I was wrong. He really must be a damn good fuck if he's got that much power over you.”

“I am not here to discuss my relationship with Brian with you,” Justin announced coldly, glaring at Melanie. “I am here to talk to you about the fact that your daughter has run away, has come to our home and has been staying there for two days and that we had no way to get in contact with you about that.”

“Why would she be at your place?”

“She came to see Gus,” Justin announced, still glaring at Melanie, his voice sounding ice cold as he continued. “You remember him? The boy you claimed to be your son, but then just abandoned without even so much as a goodbye?”

“She doesn't even know about Gus,” Melanie gave back coldly.

“Well, once again you don't seem to know your daughter at all. She found documents and pictures in your house. She figured out what they meant and figured out that she could find Gus at Britin. Where she turned up two days ago.”

“Well, send her back,” Melanie just said, before she turned towards her file again.

“Excuse me?” Justin raised his eyebrow in question.

“Send her back. I don't want her interacting with anyone in Pittsburgh. Her home is here. Send her back. I didn't allow her to go to Pittsburgh.”

“You didn't even know she has been gone for days. She could be dead, lying in a ditch somewhere and you wouldn't know. What kind of mother are you?” Justin finally felt his anger boil over. “I will damn well not send her back to a home like that where no one even notices that she's gone for days.”

“What kind of mother am I? Really, that's the conversation you want to have with me? You? Who went back to Brian, so desperate for a fuck that you didn't even care about him having your child and not telling you about it. What kind of parent does that make you?”

“You know nothing about me, Brian or our family. And I am not here to discuss my life with you. At least my children wouldn't be able to run away and not have their parents notice that they're gone. What kind of parent does that make me? The kind of parent that knows where his children are at night because I care enough about them to make them my priority and not my work.”

“Oh, is that what JR has been telling you? That she feels neglected? Well, someone has to make sure that we have a roof over our head. Not everyone has a rich sugardaddy who will pay the bills.”

“You know what, I am out of here. I came here to tell you where your daughter is, but if you're more interested in talking shit about things you don't know anything about, I couldn't care less. I have a family that's waiting for me to celebrate Thanksgiving with them.”

“I expect you to send Jenny back on the next flight,” Melanie said as she watched Justin make his way towards her office's door, ready to leave.

“I will do no such thing. Your daughter is underage. You get your ass on a plane and come and pick her up.”

“Don't be ridiculous. I have a huge case to work on that's going to trial next week. She was old enough to make her way to Pittsburgh on her own, she's old enough to fly back here on her own.”

“No, she will celebrate Thanksgiving with her brother and grandparents. Until you come and pick her up, she will not leave our house.”

“You have no right to keep her there. That's kidnapping.”

Justin actually snorted at that. “Kidnapping is what her father and your former wife did to my son. She came to us of her own free will and doesn't want to come back here. Last time I checked that's excercising her free will, not kidnapping.”

“If she is not on the next flight out, I'll call the police.”

“Please do. I am sure they would love to hear about how you didn't even notice that she was gone for two days until I came here to tell you.”

With that parting shot Justin turned around and left the office without another glance at the person that he had considered a friend many years ago.

Chapter 6

“While I am proud of you for doing the right thing, I think this could mean big trouble, Sunshine,” Brian sighed after he had listened to Justin's summary of his conversation with Melanie.

“I know, but she just made me so angry and really... I mean, she clearly didn't care. If anything she's the one who should be in trouble, not us. She's the one who didn't even care that her daughter has been gone for days. Hell, she didn't even notice her absence. How does that make us the bad guys?” Justin ranted, leaving no doubt about how angry he was.

“I know, I am just saying. You know her. She'll cause trouble. She always does.”

“Then we'll be ready for it. I refuse to send Jenny back to a mother who cares as little as that. No child deserves that,” Justin emphatically stated, making it very clear where he stood on that matter. “She's got a family that loves her and actually wants to spend time with her for christ's sake.”

“Hey, take a deep breath,” Brian said calmly, trying to follow his own advice. He was just as angry as Justin was and probably even more so at Melanie. After everything she had done to Gus, Brian couldn't believe that she would behave like this to her own daughter as well. “I'll call the lawyer and see what he says. Ask if he thinks there's any trouble we should prepare for, anything she can do about Jenny being with us.”

“Thanks,” Justin replied, now slightly calmer. “I just want her to know that there's someone out there who cares.”

“I know and I am sure she does. She's spending the day with her grandmother, she will see her brother later tonight. I am sure she realizes that there's more than just Melanie out there as far as family goes.”

Justin nodded, even though Brian couldn't see it over the phone. “Speaking of Gus, I was thinking that I should wait for him at the airport and take him home. That way I can prepare him for what is going on.”

“Are you sure? I can come and pick him up,” Brian offered, knowing that Justin had to be desperate to come home and get into the mood for Thanksgiving with his family. That he wanted to see his children and just forget about the trip to Florida.

“Don't be stupid. He's supposed to land less than two hours after I land. It would be a total waste of everyone's time to have you drive out to the airport when I am already there anyway. I'll just get myself some coffee and will wait for him. It's fine,” Justin assured his husband as he listened to the announcement that just came on over the PA system. “They are boarding my flight now. I'll call you when I've landed in Pittsburgh, okay?”

“Okay,” Brian agreed. “Have a safe flight and try to calm down, okay? I love you.”

Justin smiled, still feeling beyond happy every time he heard Brian say those words to him, even though Brian said them regularly by now. It still made him feel special, no matter how often Brian said them to him. “I love you, too. See you later.”

“Later.”

***

“Papa? What are you doing here?” Gus exclaimed as he saw his father waiting for him at his gate with a small carry-on suitcase by his side as he came off his plane in Pittsburgh.

“Surprise,” Justin announced as he engulfed his son in a hug and pulled him close. “I just came in an hour and a half ago myself and decided to wait for you. I figured I could give you a ride to Britin, if you don't mind.”

“No, of course not,” Gus smiled as he pulled back. “I didn't know you were going anywhere. Why didn't you say? I thought you'd be busy at home getting ready for Thanksgiving.”

“It was an unplanned trip,” Justin sighed. “Believe me, I'd much rather have stayed home instead.”

Gus frowned when he heard his father's tone of voice and saw the almost pained expression on his face. “Is everything okay?”

Justin nodded, trying to put on his best smile, not ready to tell Gus about Jenny's appearance in the middle of a crowded airport terminal. “Yeah, yeah. Sorry, I am just a bit tired. It's been a stressful couple of days. Let's head home.”

Knowing that this wasn't the time and place to ask more questions, Gus followed his father towards the luggage carousel to pick up his suitcase.

While they were waiting for Gus' luggage and as they made their way to the car, they made small talk, Justin telling Gus how excited Vicky was to see him and how much everyone had missed him since they had last seen him.

Gus updated his father on some of the latest projects he was working on for his classes, but the whole time he noticed that something was off. He could see that his father was tense and that his voice sounded strained at times which wasn't really like him. Usually Justin was the more relaxed, laid-back and happy of his two fathers. Not that his dad wasn't either, but just compared, Justin was always the one smiling and laughing. So the fact that he wasn't now, immediately alerted Gus to the fact that something was wrong. Only he couldn't quite imagine what it could be. He had last spoken to all of his family on Sunday before they had been off to Sunday dinner and everyone had seemed just fine then. He had texted with his dad earlier that day to confirm the status of his flight and his dad had sounded okay in his replies as well. So whatever it was, it didn't seem to be any problem in their family. Or at least Gus hoped that it wasn't.

“Papa? What's going on?” Gus asked after they had left the parking deck and had made their way onto the Interstate.

“Hmmm? Nothing,” Justin replied, looking ahead and concentrating on the traffic in front of him.

“Don't lie to me. Something is going on. You've been tense and stressed ever since you stood outside my gate. And just the fact that you'd be flying somewhere this close to Thanksgiving. Something is going on, isn't it?” Gus asked, looking at his father in concern.

Justin sighed, throwing Gus a quick glance. He smiled to himself before he replied. “You're too smart for your own good, you know that?”

“No, I just know you well enough to see that something is bothering you. Is it Dad? Luke? Vicky?” Gus asked, hardly able to hide the worry in his voice.

“No, don't worry. Everyone is fine,” Justin immediately tried to calm down his son's fears. When he saw that Gus didn't look convinced, he turned to him once more and met his eyes shortly. “Really, everyone is fine.”

Gus saw the honesty in Justin's eyes and heard it in his voice and he really doubted that his father would lie about something as important as his family's well-being to him, so he believed him and took a deep breath. “But something is going on. Otherwise you wouldn't have flown somewhere on such short notice. Where did you go?”

“To Tampa, Florida,” Justin replied, knowing that he had to tell Gus the truth. Gus more than anyone deserved to know what was going on and just the fact that they hadn't wanted to tell him over the phone what was happening was the reason why he was still the only one who didn't know about Jenny's appearance.

“Why Tampa? What's in Tampa?” Gus frowned, knowing that there had been no mention of Florida before in any of their conversations. He knew that Justin had an upcoming show in the new year, but that was in New York and Justin's agent was also in New York, so Florida seemed a weird location for what he himself called a last minute trip.

“Your mother,” Justin just replied, knowing that there was no easy way to break the news to Gus.

Justin felt more than saw Gus tense up. Gus was so much like Brian and much like Brian he didn't often show his true feelings. Yes, he was more open with his feelings than Brian and also a lot more sensitive than Brian had ever been, but when it came to unpleasant news, Gus reacted a lot like his father and Justin wasn't surprised to notice the way his jaw seemed so tense it almost looked painful.

“I don't have a mother,” Gus just pressed out in reply, not looking at Justin.

Justin knew that the crowded interstate was no place to have this conversation, so he was glad when he saw an Exit coming up and went off the Interstate. He didn't care where they were and just pulled the car into the nearest car park. Once he had turned off the vehicle, he turned to Gus and put a hand on the boy's, no young man's, shoulder. He could immediately feel the tension in Gus.

“Gus, honey.”

“I don't have a mother...Why would you go and see that woman?” Gus asked as he turned to Justin, looking at him from hurt eyes.

Justin had heard the whole story about how Melanie had left Gus with Brian without even a goodbye once she had lost custody of Gus and he had also heard all about the therapy that Gus had needed after losing both his mothers within months. As Gus had gotten older, Justin had once tried to talk to him about his mothers, but Gus had insisted that he didn't have any mothers, that they had both left and abandoned him and that he couldn't care less about them and that he had two fathers and that was all he needed to be happy. Knowing that neither he nor Brian were looking forward to any interactions with Melanie or Lindsay, Justin had just accepted that reply from Gus at the time and had left it at that. It wasn't like he could blame the boy. Both his mothers had turned out to be big disappointments, both had disappeared from his life at a young age and Gus had been living with his fathers for longer than he had ever been with his mothers, so why bring it up again when he was happy with the family he had?

“Your sister Jenny... she came to see you at Britin earlier this week,” Justin said, carefully watching Gus' reaction to that news.

“Jenny? You mean... JR?” Gus frowned, looking at his father in confusion.

Justin nodded. “She goes by Jenny now and yes, she came looking for you at Britin.”

“How? Why? I don't...,” Gus started, but then stopped, looking beyond confused.

“Apparently your mother...,” Justin immediately corrected himself when he saw Gus' expression at what he had said, “... Melanie... She had never told Jenny about you, but... Jenny found some old pictures and documents and she put two and two together and figured out who you were and where to find you.”

“And she came looking for me?” Gus asked, still not sure he understood what was going on.

“Yes. She doesn't have any family besides her mother and... from what we could gather, they don't have a good relationship. Quite on the contrary. So when she found out that she had a brother in Pittsburgh, she ran away and made her way to Pittsburgh,” Justin explained.

“And why did you go to Tampa? Why did you see her?” Gus asked, meeting Justin's concerned gaze with his own confused one.

“Jenny is 17, she's still underage. So your Dad and I tried to reach Melanie, but... we couldn't. In the end, we decided that it was best to have me go and see her in person, to speak to her directly.”

That actually made Gus chuckle a bit. “I can see why you would go and not Dad.”

Justin smiled in amusement as well and nodded. “Yeah, we figured things might go better if I go and see her. She and your Dad... That has never ended well.”

“And, did you see her?” Gus asked, raising an eyebrow. The way he did it made him look so much like Brian that Justin couldn't help but smile. As he thought about how to best answer Gus' questions, he turned more serious again.

“Yes, I did. And it did not go well,” Justin told his son in all honesty. Gus was old enough and had a right to know the truth.

He and Brian had always tried to be as honest as possible with their children and Justin didn't want to change that now.

“What happened?”

“It took forever to get to see her. I couldn't see her at home and her secretary made me wait forever in her office until I finally had enough and just stormed into it.”

Gus' eyes widened as he listened to his father's words. “You what?”

“I was really angry and frustrated. We'd been trying to talk to her for two days about her daughter's well-being and she had totally ignored all our attempts to get in contact with her. So yeah, I've finally had enough and just stormed into her office.”

Shaking his head in amazement, Gus chuckled. “And they say you're calmer and more reasonable than Dad...”

“She just made me so fucking angry,” Justin justified with a shrug. “Not that she seemed to care. She hadn't even noticed that Jenny was gone... It seems like her work comes first and Jenny is just a millstone around her neck.”

“So she hasn't changed at all,” Gus replied flatly.

“Gus,” Justin started, running his hand over his son's arm, but stopped when Gus went ahead.

“I knew she never cared about me, but I thought... I still remember when I was small and we were in Canada... how she at least seemed to care about JR, I mean Jenny back then... I knew she never liked me because of Dad being my Dad, but... Jenny is her own flesh and blood.”

“We are all very angry with her right now... It's why I was in such a bad mood at the airport. I wish I could tell you something else, honey. I really do.”

Gus shrugged and spoke after taking a deep breath. “I never had any illusions about her caring about me... I just thought she would have been different with Jenny.”

“It seems not,” Justin said sadly. “She never told Jenny about you or anyone of her Pittsburgh family. So coming here brought quite a few surprises for Jenny as well.”

“Grandma Debs?” Gus asked, looking at his father for confirmation.

Justin nodded. “Yes, they met yesterday. Debbie and Carl came for dinner and met Jenny then. Your Dad said they are spending the day together today to get to know each other better.”

“That's good,” Gus smiled. “I bet Grandma Debs must be very happy.”

“She is according to your Dad. And I am sure it's doing Jenny good as well to know that there is some family out there that loves her and likes spending time with her.”

Gus nodded once more, then turned to look at his father from sad eyes. “Is Jenny angry with me?”

Justin frowned, not sure he understood the question, but he could see in Gus' face and hear in his voice that he seemed really worried about this for some reason. “Why would she be?”

“Because I never came looking for her... I mean, now she's here and... apparently she did what I never did.”

Justin looked at Gus' face and saw the guilt and also blame there that his son now seemed to be putting on himself. God, he really was too much like his father.

“Gus, don't even think that,” Justin started, pulling his son closer and taking him into a hug. He held him close as he continued speaking. “You've got nothing to blame yourself for.”

“But shouldn't I have gone and looked for her? I mean... she did and came looking for me,” he pointed out as tears filled his eyes. “What if she hates me for never coming to look for her.”

“Gus, don't think that. She came looking for you because she wants to meet you. Jenny seems like a really nice girl and I am absolutely sure that she doesn't blame you for whatever you think you deserve blame for. You did nothing wrong.”

“But I could have done the same and never did.”

“Why not?” Justin asked, for the first time realising that he and Brian had never really talked to Gus much about Jenny. In fact he couldn't really remember mentioning her to Gus at all. “Were you scared of what your Dad I and would have said?”

Gus immediately shook his head. “No... I know that even if you had disagreed with what I wanted to do, you would have supported me anyway.”

Justin nodded, knowing that Gus was right. Even if they hadn't understood or had disagreed, Gus was right. Brian and he would have supported Gus in whatever he wanted to do, no matter what they might have thought about an attempt to get in contact with Jenny. Not that he had ever thought about it. Which he probably should have. Maybe they should have even suggested it to Gus, just to put the option out there for their son.

“We would have, but... I know we never suggested anything like that to you. Maybe we should have.”

Gus looked at his father and then smirked. “Who's blaming himself now?”


Justin had to chuckle. His son knew him too well. “I am just thinking that we never presented the option to you either. I mean... I am sure we could have hired an investigator or something to look for Melanie and Jenny if you had wanted us to.”

Gus was quiet for the longest time. When he spoke his voice was eerily quiet. “I never wanted you to.”

“Gus?” Justin frowned, not quite sure what to make of that statement.

“I was happy with you and Dad. With Luke and Vicky. I mean... maybe it makes me a bad person, but... I never really thought about Jenny much... after everything. That was another life. A life that has ended a long time ago.”

Justin nodded, understanding to a certain degree what Gus was saying. “It doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you an honest one,” Justin said, kissing his son's auburn locks as he pulled him close once again. “What you went through... at such a young age. You were just a small child when you came to live with your Dad and Luke. And Melanie made the decision to move away with Jenny without leaving us any way to contact her. It was not a decision you made, Gus. It was a decision she made for you. She closed the door on that life, not you.”

Gus leaned into his father's embrace and sighed. “But maybe I should have opened it again...”

“And maybe you would have some time in the future. Who knows? Just because you didn't do anything yet, doesn't mean you're a bad person. Far from it,” Justin said, meaning every word of it. He would be damned if Gus now went ahead and blamed himself for something that wasn't his fault as far as Justin was concerned. Gus had just been a small, scared, six year old boy who had just lost his mother and Melanie had then made the decision to take away his sister and to abandon him on top of that. He would be damned if Gus now went and blamed himself for having had a happy life anyway with their family. “You deserved all the happiness you could get, Gus. And seeing the amazing man you've become... you have no idea how proud your Dad and I are of you and everything you've achieved. You're a lot of things, but a bad person is not one of them.”

“Thanks, Papa,” Gus smiled, now wrapping his arms around his father and hugging him back. “Thanks for always knowing what to say when I need to hear it.”

“That's what parents are for,” Justin replied, holding his son tight.

“Good parents,” Gus corrected, pulling back and looking his father straight into his blue eyes. “You and Dad have been amazing for as long as I can remember and... hearing about her and how little she seems to care about Jenny, I just realise once more how lucky we are to have you and Dad.”

“We love you, Gus. Your Dad and I love you and your siblings more than anything,” Justin said seriously.

“I know. I love you, too,” Gus whispered, kissing his father's cheek before he pulled back and ran a hand through his own hair.

“You okay, Gus?” Justin asked, as he looked at his son in concern.

Gus nodded, trying to smile at his father. “I think I am. And if not, I know that you and Dad will be there to help me.”

“Of course,” Justin agreed. “Always!”

“Thanks, Papa!” Gus said sincerely, smiling at his father. “For everything.”

Justin nodded, smiling back at his son, before he turned towards the steering wheel again. “I think we should head back. Your Dad must be worried by now where we are.”

Gus agreed and looked out the window as Justin started the car once more. “What's she like?” He asked after a couple of minutes of comfortable silence between them.

“Jenny?”

“Yeah.”

“She's nice, polite. She seems smart. Luke and Vicky seem to like her and get on with her. Vicky considers her her sister now as well. We tried to explain to her that Jenny is your sister, but she doesn't seem to understand how she's your sister and not hers, so I think she's made Jenny her honorary sister as well.”

“Well, it is complicated,” Gus agreed. “I mean, she's not even really my sister if you think about it...”

“No, I guess not,” Justin agreed, turning towards Gus. “Is that a problem for you?”

“No,” Gus said. “Just because we don't have the same parents doesn't mean we can't be siblings. If things had gone differently, we would have grown up as brother and sister...”

“I guess...”

“I am just glad that she has found us and the rest of the family. Everyone deserves to have a loving family and to be cared about. And I know that our family will welcome her with open arms.”

“Yeah,” Justin agreed, smiling at his son, proud of him for what he had just said. “They will. She will have us, her grandparents, her uncles. She has a family now.”

Gus nodded, a smile on his face as well, before he turned away to look out the window again as they made their way home.

Chapter 7

“Gus!!!” A happy voice exclaimed as Vicky ran towards the door and jumped into her brother's arms. She loved her big brother and always missed him terribly when he was away in New York at university.

“Hey munchkin, did you miss me?” Gus smiled as he hugged his sister and twirled around with her in his arms.

“YES!” She exclaimed as she covered his face in kisses. “I missed you soooooooo much.”

Justin laughed as he came into the house behind Gus, totally being ignored by his daughter for the moment who was too focused on Gus to even notice that her Papa had come home as well.

“Good to know that you missed me, too, Princess!”

“I missed you,” a deep voice said as Brian made his way towards Justin and pulled him close. “A lot. And you, too,” he added, as he gave Gus' shoulder a squeeze, who nodded happily at his father.

“I know, I missed you, too,” Justin sighed as he sank into his husband's arms, enjoying the feeling of being held by Brian again. Yes, he had only been gone a day, but that had been too long as far as he was concerned.

“I missed you, too, Papa,” Vicky then announced, still in her brother's arms, but now at least looking over to where her fathers were hugging.

“I am glad to hear that because I missed you as well. And I heard you weren't happy with how Daddy did your hair?”

Vicky looked at him from her big eyes and emphatically shook her head. “No, he did it all wrong.”

Brian just chuckled, then nibbled on Justin's ear. “Told you...”

“I guess it's good that I am back, so I can take care of it again.”

“Yes,” Vicky nodded, before jumping down, out of her brother's arms and moving towards her fathers. “I'm glad you're back home, Papa,” she said before she wrapped her little arms around his waist and held him tight.

Justin smiled and ran his hand through her blond locks. “So am I.”

“Why don't you help me unpack my luggage?” Gus suggested as he took his sister's hand, who seemed only too happy to oblige and went up the stairs towards the bedrooms with her brother. “Hey, baby brother,” they heard Gus say as he made his way up the stairs and just a second later they saw Luke hug his brother at the top of the stairs as well.

“He seems okay,” Brian said as he looked after their children as they disappeared around the corner towards Gus' room.

“Yeah, I think he is. He seemed quite shocked at first and blamed himself, but I think he's better now...,” Justin sighed then gave Brian a quick kiss before he took his suitcase and headed for the stairs as well. Brian followed him and once they made it to their room, hearing the laughter of their children from Gus' room, Brian turned towards Justin with a frown.

“Blamed himself? What for?”

“That he never went and looked for Jenny and that it has been her who came looking for him.”

“That's bullshit,” Brian muttered as he looked at Justin.

“Not to him. He felt like it made him a bad person that he never even thought about looking for her,” Justin tried to explain, knowing that Brian wouldn't like hearing this.

“He hardly knew her. She was what? A year and a half when Melanie left? And before he wasn't really involved in her life either. He told me how he had never been allowed to help take care of her or feed her... He had no relationship with her,” Brian argued, looking at Justin from confused eyes.

“I know,” Justin said calmly, running a hand over Brian's arm as he spoke. “I think he just felt like he should have been the one looking for her, not the other way round. He thought she might be angry with him for not looking for her.”

Brian went over to the bed and flopped down on the side of it. “Did he think we wouldn't support him if he wanted to look for her?”

“No,” Justin joined Brian and sat down next to him. “He knew we would have. I think it has really never crossed his mind. He said it felt like Jenny and Melanie were another life. A life long gone. He has been happy with us, with Luke and Vicky. I don't think he ever really thought much about his old life with her and Jenny... Not that I blame him.”

Brian nodded, pulling Justin close. “I guess this is not the Thanksgiving he was looking forward to.”

“It's not the Thanksgiving any of us had planned,” Justin chuckled, resting his head on Brian's shoulder and running a hand over Brian's thigh. “But we'll be fine. All of us, including Gus. He knows that we're here to support and help him. I know he'll be okay.”

Brian smiled ruefully as Justin continued to run his hand over his thigh. “I hope so.”

“I know so. He's got a good head on his shoulders. And he's got the whole family here for support. I mean... at least she came here where we can help and support him. Imagine if she had just shown up in New York and he would have been on his own.”

Brian shuddered at the thought. “Yeah, I guess you're right. I am just worried because... God... Melanie did quite a number on him and when she left... he was a mess.”

“I know,” Justin sighed, remembering the stories Brian and his mother had told him about the problems Gus had had in the wake of Melanie's disappearance. “He got really angry when I called her his mother. He immediately insisted that she wasn't his mother.”

“That's my boy,” Brian whispered, not able to help himself despite the seriousness of the situation.

Justin shook his head, not able to hide his own amusement at Brian's reaction. “You can't imagine how cold she was. She didn't care. She didn't even know that Jenny was gone and had been gone for several days already. All she went on about was her big trial that was coming up and you.”

“Me?” Brian frowned.

“I am sorry to break it to you, but she still doesn't like you,” Justin said, before he pulled back and met Brian's gaze. “She seemed more interested in me and you being married than in her own daughter.”

“I am not surprised,” Brian admitted. “After everything Jenny has said... She also mentioned quite a few things when Debbie and Carl were here and none of them any good.”

“I am glad they are spending the day together and getting to know each other. I think this will be good for both her and Debbie.”

“Yeah. Debbie is over the moon to have her here. She's cooked enough to feed five armies, just so that Jenny can try every family recipe that Debbie has ever heard about... You don't want to see the fridge and freezer.”

Justin chuckled, once more running his hand over Brian's thigh. “I am happy for them. And I am sure we will survive.”

“You're not the one that will have to run an extra hour each day for the next month. It all just goes right where it belongs.”

“To my bubble butt,” Justin snorted, rolling his eyes at Brian.

“Exactly,” Brian nodded, before he moved his hand to said bubble butt. “And what a nice bubble butt it is.”

Justin leaned in for a quick kiss, but then pulled away and got up. “And you can play with it later all you want.”

“Is that a promise?” Brian raised an eyebrow and Justin could already see the ideas forming in his head.

He leaned in for another kiss. “It is,” he whispered into the kiss, before he moved over to his suitcase and started unpacking. “But later. I think you should talk to Gus first.”

“Way to kill the mood, Sunshine,” Brian complained, before he got up as well, knowing that Justin was right though. They would have all evening and all night later, but for now their children were more important.

“I'll make it up to you later,” Justin promised with a smirk, shaking his ass as he went into their ensuite to put away his shaving kit.

“You better,” Brian muttered, as he went towards the door of their room. Though he had no doubt that Justin would. So far he had always kept his promises and Brian knew that tonight would be no exception. It would be well worth the wait.

***

“They are really happy that you're back home,” Brian said as he watched Luke and Vicky leave Gus' room, in search of their Papa, ready to welcome him home as well.

“Yeah,” Gus smiled happily, as he looked at his father. “I missed them, too. All of you.”

“I am glad you're back home, if only for a couple of days,” Brian said as he moved over to Gus' bed and flopped down on it. Gus would be home until Sunday, before he had to return to New York for his classes that would start again next week.

“I'll be here for longer for Christmas,” Gus said as he looked at his father.

“I know. It's just so weird to not have you home anymore,” Brian sighed.

“Dad, this is already my second year at university. You should be used to it by now.”

“There are some things a parent will never get used to,” his father chuckled. “You better get used to that.”

Gus chuckled as well, then flopped down next to his father on his bed, knowing that his father wanted to talk to him and also knowing what about. “I am okay, Dad.”

“Are you?” Brian asked with a raised eyebrow.

Gus nodded. “I think so, yeah.”

“It would be alright if you weren't,” Brian said, but then stopped.

“I won't lie. I was shocked at first when Papa said Jenny had shown up here and... I won't lie about it also bringing back some memories I'd rather not think about, but... Papa and I talked and I think I am okay. And if not, I know that I'll be. That you and Papa will be here to help me.”

“Of course we'll be,” Brian immediately agreed. “You're not alone in this, Gus. Everyone is dealing in their own way right now, but if you need to talk to me or your Papa about this, we're always here to help.”

“I know, Dad. And I also know how incredibly lucky I am that you are,” Gus threw an arm around his father's shoulders and leaned in to give him a kiss on his cheek. “I love you, Dad.”

“Love you, too, Sonny Boy,” Brian whispered back, pulling Gus closer.

They stayed like that for several minutes, before Gus pulled back. “I guess I just realised once again how different my life could have been if you hadn't fought for me and gotten custody back then, you know?”

“Gus,” Brian started, but stopped when Gus shook his head.

“I know you always would have. It's just that I know how lucky I am to have had you and Papa supporting me in everything I did growing up. Hearing about how she treated Jenny just made me think back to how she treated me and... I just know that I was very lucky to have you on my side fighting for me. What Jenny went through... it could have been me, if things had gone differently.”

Brian didn't quite know how to reply to that. He wanted to say that it never would have been that way for Gus, but he knew well enough what Gus' time with Jenny and Melanie in Toronto had been like when she had lied to his son about Brian being too busy with Luke to see him. So instead he just nodded and stayed quiet.

“I am just happy that she found us and Grandma Debs and Grandpa Carl. She deserves a loving family as well,” Gus went on. “She deserves better than what that woman did to her.”

“Yeah, she does,” Brian agreed, pulling his son close once more. “You're a good boy, you know that? I am so proud of you!”

“And I am proud of you, Dad. You did what she never could have,” Gus said, leaning into his father's embrace. “You changed your whole life and always made sure that we were your priority.”

“Because you are. You, Luke and Vicky are all that matters. Nothing else is worth anything if you three aren't happy,” Brian said, meaning every word of it.

Yes, he had done very well professionally and both Kinnetik and Babylon were making him a rich man, but none of that money mattered to him. What mattered were his children and Justin and their happiness. None of the money could make him as happy as these four people could.

“And Papa. Don't forget him,” Gus chuckled, knowing that his Dad wouldn't be happy if his other father wasn't either.

“Never,” Brian chuckled. “He wouldn't let me live it down if I forgot about him.”

“And rightfully so,” Gus pointed out, before he got up again and went back to his suitcase. “I am really okay, Dad. You don't have to worry about me.”

Brian nodded, looking at his son and seeing that Gus was speaking the truth. “Alright,” he said as he got up and walked towards Gus' bedroom door. “I will always worry about you though. It's what I do.”

Gus smiled at his father, meeting his gaze. “I know. I am glad you do.”

Brian nodded once more, then left the room.

***

“Can I come with you?” Gus asked as his father announced that he would be heading to Debbie's to pick up Jenny.

“Sure,” Brian nodded. “If that's what you want.”

“Yeah, I think it'll be better to meet her at Grandma's place for the first time instead of here with Luke and Vicky around,” Gus said.

“Your Papa can keep them busy,” Brian offered, looking towards Justin who nodded in agreement.

“We'll get started on preparations for tomorrow's dinner. They both want to help, so we'll be busy in the kitchen for a while,” Justin added.

They had just finished dinner and Luke and Vicky had run off towards the living-room after helping their fathers clear the table, leaving Gus and their fathers on their own.

“No, I think it's better this way. And I think I also don't want to wait any longer than necessary,” Gus said, looking from his Dad to his Papa and back. “I just want to get it done with, you know?”

“It will be fine, Gus,” Justin said, looking at his son from concerned eyes. “She's a really nice girl and I am sure she will like you just like Luke and Vicky do.”

He hadn't been blind, neither had Brian been, and they had both seen how nervous and distracted Gus had been ever since they had come home. It hadn't been very noticeable, but they both knew their son well enough to notice anyway and they had both been sure that it had been about Jenny. Now they weren't surprised to have their suspicions confirmed.

“Yeah,” Gus just replied, before he looked at his fathers. “What will happen next? I mean... I know you went to Tampa to talk to her, but you said it didn't end well...”

Justin sighed and met eyes with Brian. When Brian nodded, agreeing that they should tell Gus the truth, Justin went on. “Your Dad talked to a lawyer earlier today. Melanie threatened to call the police on us.”

“For what?” Gus seemed outraged at the mere idea and his face immediately showed his anger.

“Kidnapping,” Brian said quietly.

“How is it kidnapping if Jenny came here of her own free will?” Gus frowned, not sure he understood.

“That's what we're thinking as well, but just to be on the safe side, your father talked to a lawyer,” Justin said.

“And what did he say?”

“That for now we're on the safe side. It's not kidnapping and Melanie wouldn't be getting anywhere with her claims,” Brian said.

“But?” Gus raised an eyebrow, meeting his father's gaze head on. He had clearly heard the but in there.

“But, she is Jenny's mother and has custody. As Jenny is underage, Melanie is the one who can and has to decide where Jenny will be, especially once school starts again,” his father finished.

“What does that mean?” Gus asked, looking from his Dad to his Papa. “Does that mean Jenny will have to go back to her?”

“Not necessarily,” Justin said, carefully considering his words. “As Jenny is already 17, the situation isn't quite as clear as it would be if she were younger. At her age her wishes would most likely be taken into consideration at this point.”

“So, if she wants to stay here, she can?” Gus asked, still not sure he really understood.

“It's more complicated than that,” Brian sighed. “We'll have to sit down and talk about how to go forward, but we should do that together with Jenny. For now, she will stay here and celebrate Thanksgiving with us and then afterwards, we'll sit down and have a conversation about how to go forward. As Melanie has custody, we can't just ignore her wishes.”

“Her wishes? Why would her opinion matter? She didn't even know Jenny was gone,” Gus was outraged and both his fathers could hear it.

“We know,” Justin said, looking at Gus. “Custody issues are complicated and don't always make sense.”

“Can't you take her to court for custody like you did with me?” Gus asked, looking at his Dad questioningly.

“Things are different than they were back then,” Brian replied slowly, not wanting to disappoint Gus.

“Because I was your son, but she's not your daughter?”

“Yes,” Brian agreed. “When it was about you, I had rights because I am your father, but with Jenny... It would be different. Melanie is her mother and her father is gone. That leaves Melanie with all the rights.”

“So, Jenny would have to go back to her until she's 18 and can make her own decisions?”

“We don't know, Gus. It's a very complicated issue with many things to consider. We'll all have to sit down together and talk about this together to see what our options are. And then we'll make a decision together,” Justin said, taking Gus' hand and giving it a squeeze. “But even if she had to go back until she was 18, she would now have a family here and she wouldn't be alone. She'd have our support. And who knows? Maybe Melanie will agree that she's better off here with her family than with her. It would give her more time to focus on her work after all.”

Gus wasn't surprised to hear the bitterness in his father's voice at the end of his statement. He felt the same about Melanie, but also knew that it would never be that easy. “You don't believe that, do you? She would never let Jenny stay in Pittsburgh. She hates all of us.”

“Gus,” Brian started, but stopped when Gus turned towards him.

“Maybe not hate, but she certainly doesn't like us. Do you really think she would let Jenny stay with us?”

“I can't say that I can see that happening right now, but stranger things have happened,” he replied diplomatically. “We shouldn't worry about it too much though. Not now. We don't want this to spoil our Thanksgiving. We'll have a nice Thanksgiving tomorrow, welcoming Jenny into the family and then afterwards, we'll sit down together and consider all our options.”

“Together?” Gus asked, wanting to make sure that he was to be included in whatever decision was going to be made.

“Together,” Justin agreed.

Gus sighed, not really happy with the answer, but knowing that for now with the holiday coming up there wasn't much they could do anyway. And his fathers were right, they shouldn't let it spoil their holiday. Everyone had been looking forward to Thanksgiving for a long time and Gus knew that his grandmothers and his Papa always put a lot of work into preparing a huge feast for the whole Liberty Avenue family. They should try to enjoy the holiday and then afterwards they would get together and talk over their options. For now it seemed like the best plan they had.

“Okay,” he nodded, meeting his fathers' gazes head on. “That's what we'll do.”

Five minutes later Brian and Gus were on their way to Pittsburgh to pick up Jenny.

Chapter 8

“Gus, honey! I didn't know you were coming,” Debbie said happily as she saw her oldest grandson outside her door with his father.

“Hi Grandma,” Gus greeted her and allowed her to engulf him in a crushing hug.

“God, what are they feeding you in New York? You're only skin and bones,” she complained as she released him from her arms and gave him a once-over.

“I am sure you and Grandma Jen will be feeding me tomorrow,” Gus replied jovially, knowing that it was true. He knew that both grandmothers had always complained about his fathers being too thin and now they had moved on to complain about him being too thin even though he didn't think he was. They just wanted to fatten him up.

“You bet on it, honey. It's not like he ever would,” she threw a glance in Brian's direction, shaking her head as she muttered. “No carbs after seven, my ass.”

“And what a nice one it is,” Brian snarked, before he followed Gus into the house, stopping shortly to leave a kiss on Debbie's cheek.

“You kids nowadays...,” Debbie shook her head, before she closed the door.

“I ate your tuna casserole yesterday and will eat the turkey tomorrow. I really don't know what you're complaining about,” Brian shrugged, giving her a winning smile.

Debbie shook her head in amusement, knowing that this was an argument she would never win. They just didn't know how to appreciate good food. Instead she decided to focus on Gus again.

“Honey, how are your classes going? Sunshine said you were busy finishing up some projects.”

“Yeah, I had to finish two paintings and a sculpture for my courses, but I am happy with the final result. I can show you some pictures when you come over tomorrow.”

“Who would have thought that I would end up with two Picassos in my family?” Debbie gushed, leaving another smack of her lips on Gus' cheeks.

“I wouldn't go that far yet,” Gus started, never quite sure how to react to people praising his work. As far as he was concerned his father was a true artist, but he was merely just dabbling around in the arts. He would be lucky if he would one day have half the career that his father had and could live of it. Most artists couldn't and he was well aware of how hard an artist's life was. Nonetheless his fathers had always supported him in his choices.

“Take the compliments while you can get them,” his father advised, squeezing Gus' shoulders. “Didn't I teach you anything?”

Everyone laughed at that before they moved further into the house.

“Gus, it's good to see you back. Did you have a good flight home?” Carl asked from his seat on the sofa where he was watching the news on TV.

Gus walked over and sat down next to the man who had pretty much been his grandfather for most of his life. “Yeah, it was good. Though going through security and all of that took longer than the flight itself.”

Carl nodded. “Well, if it keeps everyone safe.”

“I guess so. I just wish it was easier to come home, you know? But it's good to be back and see everyone again. I am really missing the family dinners. Eating alone on a Sunday is just not the same.”

“Awww, you know we miss you, too,” Carl said, smiling at the young man at his side.

Brian and Debbie watched the scene as they made their way into the kitchen.

“Where's Jenny?” Brian asked, noticing that the girl was nowhere to be seen.

“Upstairs in Sunshine's old room,” Debbie said.

Brian nodded, clearly having heard what she hadn't said. That it was also Michael's old room.

“She wanted to have some time on her own, she said.”

“Is she okay?” Brian frowned.

“I think so. It's just a lot to take in, you know? She's found out a lot of things in recent days and not all of it good. She seemed fine and I think she just needed a bit of time to process it all.”

Brian nodded. He could very well understand that. It wasn't easy to find out that you had a whole family that you had never heard about and to hear that your father who you thought was an anonymous sperm donor was anything but, but was indeed a convicted felon and practically the black sheep of the family you had only just found out about.

“How did Sunshine's trip to Florida go?” Debbie asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Don't ask,” Brian sighed as he leaned against the counter. “It was a disaster.”

“Did he get to speak to Melanie?”

“Yeah, but it didn't end well. Short summary: She's still a bitch, didn't even know that Jenny was gone and was more concerned about Justin being back with me than her own daughter. Oh and she wants to get the police involved if we don't send Jenny back on the next flight home because she doesn't want her daughter to interact with us.” Brian made a face that clearly told Debbie what he thought of that.

“The police? What for?” Debbie nearly screeched which also got the attention of Gus and Carl who looked over curiously. After checking that everything seemed okay, both men returned to their own conversation.

“She says we kidnapped Jenny. Fuck me if I know how that makes sense in her head.”

“You didn't do anything! You and Sunshine took care of her daughter when she didn't even know where Jenny was. How dare she?” Debbie erupted, her face red in anger. “God, that woman... I swear to God, if I ever lay eyes on her again, I will...”

“Get in line and wait until it's your turn,” Brian smirked. “Don't forget that I still have an ax to grind with her for what she did to sonny boy,” he added as he looked over at Gus in the living-room.

Debbie nodded, then took a deep breath. “What are you going to do?”

Brian shrugged. “Sunshine told her we would not be sending Jenny back and that she would have to come here and get her herself.”

“Good for him!”

“I spoke to our lawyer earlier, he said we have nothing to worry about as far as her claims of kidnapping go, but... aside from that. She's Jenny's mother, she's got custody and Jenny is underage,” Brian shrugged. “Not much we can do to argue with that.”

“So Jenny will have to go back?” Debbie seemed outraged and her hand flew to her mouth in shock. “No, we can't allow that.”

“As she's 17, her opinion would be taken into account. Also Melanie's apparent neglect, but...,” Brian sighed. “Custody issues are complicated. Justin and I were thinking that we should get together after the holidays, you guys, us, Gus and Jenny and talk about all options that we have. And then make a decision together.”

“Too right we should. I will not allow my granddaughter to go back to that woman!”

“But first, we should all try and have a nice Thanksgiving. I think we all need it after this week. And Jenny most of all,” Brian added. “Anything else can wait until after the holiday. I doubt that Melanie will do anything tonight or tomorrow. According to Justin she's got this really big case coming up next week and it seems that all her focus is on that.”

“That woman... What is wrong with her?”

“Do you really want me to get into that? It would be a long list.”

They were interrupted by Gus at that point, who had come over to the kitchen. “If it's okay, I'll go upstairs and check on Jenny.”

Debbie and Brian nodded and it was Debbie who spoke in a gentle voice. “You do that, honey. She will be happy to see you.”

Gus nodded, then made his way upstairs to what he knew used to be his Papa's old room when he used to live in his grandma's house when he was younger.

He stopped outside the door and knocked first, not just wanting to burst into the room. When he heard a quiet 'Come in', he opened the door.

“Hey Jenny,” he said as he slowly made his way inside. He saw Jenny turn around in surprise from where she had been standing looking at some pictures on a pin board over the desk and it was obvious that she clearly had expected someone else to come looking for her. Maybe Debbie or Carl, maybe even one of his fathers, but clearly not Gus himself.

Her eyes widened and she looked at him for the longest time. “Wow...you really look like a younger version of your father. I thought they were kidding.”

Gus just nodded, by now used to comments like that. “Yeah, it's a curse and a blessing.”

She shrugged. “It could be worse.”

“I guess it could be,” Gus agreed, as he made his way over. “Grandpa Carl said you have been up here for a while now. Are you okay?”

She shrugged, turning back to the pin board. “I guess. It's a lot to take in.”

“I can only imagine. My fathers told me that you didn't know anything about the Pittsburgh family.”

“No, nothing. I always thought it was just my mom and me. And now there is this whole family here with so much history and...,” she stopped, not quite sure how to continue.

“Shit?” Gus asked, wondering if that was what she wanted to refer to.

“Yeah,” she nodded. “It's a lot to process.”

“And I guess Grandma Debbie can take some time getting used to as well,” Gus winked, trying to break the sombre mood that had settled between them. “I can't believe you made it through a whole day with her after only getting to know her yesterday. That's brave.”

“She's so nice,” Jenny sighed. “Everyone has been so nice.”

“Yeah, they are. It's a great little family,” Gus said with a smile on his face. And he meant it. He loved his family, not only his fathers and his siblings, but also his grandparents, his uncles. Everyone. As mismatched as they might appear to someone on the outside, as great and loving they were to everyone in the family.

“You are so lucky,” Jenny said, before she turned away from the desk and back to Gus. “I didn't expect to find this when I came looking for you.”

“I can only imagine,” Gus nodded, before he moved towards the bed and plopped down on it. “I have to admit that I didn't expect to hear that you were here when I came home either.”

“I am sorry for just showing up like that. I guess I should have started with a letter or email or something before I just appeared like that,” Jenny hung her head and shoulders and Gus immediately felt bad for the way what he had said had sounded.

“That's not what I meant. I am glad you're here,” he immediately replied. When he saw Jenny's doubtful expression, he went on. “I really am. I have to admit that I was shocked at first, but when my fathers told me about you and your life with your mom... I am happy that you found us, that you found your family here. Everyone deserves people that love them.”

“They don't even know me.”

“That won't stop them from loving you. Especially Grandma Debs. She's over the moon to have you here. You're now part of the family, so you better get used to it. And from what I hear, Vicky has declared you her new sister, so...,” Gus winked.

“She's amazing. She's so open and welcoming. And so happy,” Jenny couldn't help but smile as she thought about the little girl who had welcomed her into her heart over the last two days.

“That would be Vicky,” Gus agreed with a smile.

“Everyone in your family has been great. I mean, your father just up and left and flew to Florida because of me. I'm sure he would have had better things to do, but he did it anyway.”

“Yeah, he's pretty great.”

“Is he back now?” Jenny asked as she moved over to the bed herself and sat down next to her brother.

“Yeah, he arrived back earlier this afternoon. He's at home preparing stuff for tomorrow with Luke and Vicky.”

“Do you know how his trip went? Did he get to see my mother?”

Gus nodded. “Yeah, he did, but from what he told me, it didn't go well.”

Jenny hung her head. “Yeah, I am not surprised.”

“Apparently your mom hadn't really noticed your absence and when she heard that you were staying with my fathers, she seemed to be more concerned about my Dad than about you,” Gus told her honestly. He had thought about lying to her at first, but Jenny was 17 and she knew her mother better than anyone, so Gus was sure that her expectations hadn't been too high anyway. And in any case, she had known that his father had flown to Florida because Melanie had ignored all their messages, so she knew the truth about how much her mother cared or rather didn't.

“They really can't stand each other, can they?” Jenny asked with a raised eyebrow. “I know your Dad has been trying to be nice about her for my sake every time he talked about her, but... he really can't stand her.”

“No, he can't. Most of the family here doesn't have a high opinion of her,” Gus confirmed. “Some things happened and there was a custody trial when I was younger and when my Dad was awarded custody of me, she never even said goodbye to me and just disappeared with you. She never talked to anyone in the family again after that. I know he never got on well with her before that either, but after that, he never forgave her for that.”

“And then there's what my father did to your brother... I am surprised he is this nice to me.”

“Of course he would be. You are not responsible for your parents' behaviour. My dad would never blame you for anything they did. No one here would. In our family everyone is really big on taking responsibility for your own actions. They will judge you for those, but not for what anyone else did. I mean... if you look at it, my biological mother is the one that tried to kidnap my brother. And here I am living with my dads...,” Gus said quietly.

“It really is one colourful family history, isn't it?” Jenny said, sounding slightly amused.

“And you don't even know half of it,” Gus joked, glad to see when Jenny smiled in return. “But at the end of the day, you couldn't wish for a better family. They are great!”

“Yeah, I am starting to see that. I really like your fathers and siblings. And Grandma Debbie and Carl are really nice.”

They stayed upstairs in Justin's old room for another half an hour, before they decided to return downstairs and join everyone there.

They found Brian and Carl on the sofa in the living room, deep in conversation and Debbie was in the kitchen cleaning up from their dinner.

“There you are,” Brian said as he got up from the sofa. He locked eyes with Gus, then Jenny. “You guys okay?”

When both nodded in reply and Brian could see that they really meant it, he felt relieved. “That's good.”

Debbie came over and joined them, clutching her dish towel close. “It's so good to see you guys together again. I never thought this day would ever come, but now that it's here,” her voice got teary as she spoke. “I am so happy.”

“So am I,” Jenny said as she came over and gave her grandmother a hug.

“We all are,” Gus agreed and Brian nodded in reply.

“Okay, before this gets too lesbionic even for me, let's head home. I still have plans for my husband tonight,” Brian smirked and was rewarded with an outraged 'Brian!' from Debbie and a disgusted 'Dad' from Gus. Jenny just looked at him as if she wasn't sure if he had really meant what he had said or not.

“You'll get used to him,” Gus just said as he nudged his sister's side with his elbow. “He's hopeless when it comes to Papa.”

Brian rolled his eyes, not even dignifying his son's statement with a response. Instead he walked over to Debbie and left a kiss on her cheek. “See you tomorrow, Ma!”

Debbie nodded as she kissed him back. “You give Sunshine my best.”

“Why?” He raised an eyebrow. “You'll see him in what? 12 hours? 13 hours? Do it yourself.”

“Brian Kinney-Taylor,” Debbie started, raising her hand which still held the dish towel.

“Alright, alright. Just saying,” Brian smirked, before he walked over to Carl and squeezed his shoulder. “See you tomorrow, Carl.”

“See you, son,” the older man said with a smile, before he got up and said goodbye to Gus and Jenny as well.

Lastly, Debbie said goodbye to her grandchildren, hugging both of them tight and kissing them on their cheeks.

“I had a nice day, Grandma. Thanks for inviting me,” Jenny smiled at her as she pulled back from the kiss.

“Anytime, honey. Anytime.”

Five minutes later Brian, Gus and Jenny were heading home, after all Brian still had plans for his husband as he had reminded everyone once again when they continued saying goodbye for another couple of minutes.

Chapter 9

“Brian, stop,” Justin admonished, though his voice sounded playful more than anything. “I have to get breakfast ready for the kids.”

“They are old enough to get their own breakfast, Sunshine. I know of so many better things we could be doing instead,” Brian smirked, before he continued nibbling on Justin's earlobe while his husband tried to prepare breakfast for their family.

“Vicky isn't,” Justin pointed out as he tried to move away from Brian's wandering mouth and hands.

“She's got two older brothers that can get her something to eat.”

“You are hopeless,” Justin chuckled as he finally made his way out of Brian's embrace. He threw his  husband a playful glare before he opened the fridge and got some juice and milk from it.

“Hopelessly in love with you? You got that one right,” Brian chuckled, before he sighed dramatically. “Fine, you win. Breakfast first.” He then moved over towards the counter and got started on preparing scrambled eggs when Justin handed him the box of eggs.

“You are the best husband ever,” Justin snorted, but then came over and wrapped his arms around Brian's midsection. “I love you,” he said more seriously, leaning into Brian's broad shoulders, sighing happily.

“You need to make up your mind, Sunshine. It's either breakfast or play time.”

Justin left a gentle kiss on Brian's neck, but didn't release his hold on his midsection yet. “Breakfast now and I promise to make play time worth the wait later. How does that sound?”

When Brian turned around in his arms, Justin smiled up at the taller man, happy to see the happiness in those hazel eyes that he loved so much.

“Sounds great,” Brian whispered, then leaned in and claimed Justin's lips in a searing kiss.

***

“What's going on? Why are you waiting here outside the kitchen?” Gus frowned when he saw Jenny standing next to the doorway, but not moving inside.

“Your fathers... they are...,” she started, but then stopped, not quite sure how to continue.

“Making out?” Gus raised an eyebrow in question. When Jenny nodded, he wasn't surprised at all. “They always are. You'll get used to it.”

With that he unceremoniously passed his sister and made his way into the kitchen. “Dad, Papa, can you please stop? You're scaring Jenny,” he said as he passed his fathers on the way to the coffee machine.

They were locked in an embrace and kissing and he wasn't even sure if they had heard him or not, until they broke apart slightly breathless. The blush on Justin's face was a clear indication though that he had heard him.

“Uhm, morning Gus,” Justin muttered, before turning to Jenny, still blushing furiously. “Morning, Jenny. Sorry about that.”

Brian couldn't hide his amusement at his husband's blush and playfully squeezed his ass as he moved towards the fridge again. “You're such a WASP. Always so proper.”

“Brian,” Justin sighed, then got some more stuff for their breakfast out of the fridge. He walked over to Jenny and smiled at her. “Ignore him. He's hopeless.”

“It's okay,” Jenny muttered, looking from Gus to his fathers and back. Gus didn't even act like what had just happened was out of the ordinary, so she assumed that it must have been a pretty normal display of affection between the two men. “I don't mind. I think it's cute how much in love you are. I just didn't want to...”

“Interrupt,” Gus supplied. “You guys really need to learn to keep it to your bedroom when we have guests. You might have scarred me and Luke and Vicky for life, but leave Jenny out of it.”

Everyone in the kitchen could hear the joke in his voice and Brian shook his head dramatically. “How did I end up with such a prude for a son?”

“I am not a prude. I just know how to behave in company,” Gus gave right back, before he took his first sip of coffee and sighed happily.

A second later Luke came into the room, looking around at everyone. “What's going on here?”

“Jenny caught them making out,” Gus readily supplied, then flopped down at the kitchen table.

Luke snorted, then walked over to Jenny and gave her a clap on the back. “Welcome to the family. You're now as scarred for life as we are.”

“You make us sound like horrible parents,” Justin muttered, as he placed a plate with some slices of toast and some bagels on the table.

“You know that we love you,” Luke grinned as he grabbed a slice of toast and took a bite. “That doesn't mean that we can't be disgusted by our parents making out like any other decent teenager would be.”

“Hey, I am not a teenager,” Gus complained, just as he was about to take another sip of coffee.

“I was speaking for myself,” Luke explained, before he flopped down next to his brother.

Jenny watched the interactions between the brothers and their fathers and could see that everyone in the kitchen had a smile on their face and that no one seemed offended by what had been said. Everyone seemed amused more than anything.

“Where's your sister?” Brian directed towards Gus and Luke with a raised eyebrow, surprised that Vicky hadn't made an appearance yet. Usually she would be the first of their children to wake up and would come and wake him and Justin up at the crack of dawn.

“Right there,” Gus nodded towards Jenny, then stuck out his tongue at his father when he rolled his eyes. “Oh, you mean the other one? The incarnation of the devil...”

“How early?” Justin just asked, as he sat down at the kitchen table and poured himself some more coffee.

“Barely 6 o'clock,” Gus gave back, then nodded towards his cup of coffee. “Hence the need for coffee this morning. She said she missed me so much and she couldn't wait to tell me all about her new teacher and all the things she had learned in recent weeks and boy, did she tell me alright. I think she talked for two hours straight.”

Brian brought over the scrambled eggs and placed them in the middle of the table. “She's got that from him, not from me. Just saying,” he said with a smirk at his husband.

“She missed you,” Justin said with a gentle smile on his face. “And she's really excited about you being here for a couple of days.”

“I know,” Gus replied. “And I missed her too. It's just that she went back to sleep and is sleeping now, while I am here trying to get myself ready to survive the day with coffee. It's unfair.”

“We'll make sure she'll leave you alone tomorrow morning,” Brian offered, locking eyes with Justin who nodded in agreement.

“Nah, it's okay. I know she misses me and really? I missed her too and I think it's cute.”

Once the table was set, Justin excused himself from the table. “I'll check on her. She will be sad to miss breakfast with all of us. You guys already start, we'll be back in a minute.”

Everyone started having breakfast and indeed Justin returned just a couple of minutes later, carrying his still tired daughter in his arms. He sat down with her, brushing her hair out of her face.

Brian leaned over, looking at her in concern. “Hey princess, you alright?”

“Tired, Daddy,” she muttered, before she yawned to underline her statement.

“That's what happens when you wake up at the crack of dawn,” Justin chuckled, before he started preparing his bagel with cream cheese, skillfully preparing it while his daughter was still nestled into his chest. “You want some juice?”

Vicky nodded and whispered a quiet thanks to her Dad when Brian filled her glass and handed it to her.

Conversation picked up around the table once more and after a couple of minutes of fully waking up, Vicky joined in as well, being her usual lively self once more, entertaining everyone around the table with her tale of waking up Gus earlier that morning.

***

After everyone had finished breakfast and helped with the clean up, preparations for their big Thanksgiving dinner started.

Justin, Luke and Vicky continued whatever preparations they had started in the kitchen the day before while Brian and Gus checked on the dining room, got the dinnerware and cutlery, so everything would be available when Emmett turned up, ready to set the table.

Jenny watched in quiet fascination how the family seemed to work together like a well oiled machine. Everyone seemed to have their dedicated tasks and seemed to know exactly what they were doing.

It wasn't long before the first members of the family started to arrive. The first ones were Debbie and Carl. Jenny's eyes widened when she saw the amount of food they carried into the house, but nobody else seemed surprised at all. She had seen Justin and Luke and Vicky working on food, so she hadn't expected her grandmother to bring that much food as well, but apparently everyone else had.

Greetings and hugs were exchanged, before the doorbell rang again.

“Auntie Em,” Vicky exclaimed excitedly as she ran into the arms of the tall man that made his way over towards the kitchen.

“Now if it isn't my favourite goddaughter in the world,” he exclaimed just as happily as he hugged her close.

Once he let her down, he moved on to say hello to everyone else. Jenny couldn't help but be amazed about the familiarity in which everyone greeted the newcomer. There were hugs, smiles, jokes and all throughout she could see how Vicky, Gus and Luke were part of every conversation. This was so different to how her mom and her friends behaved with her. They always told her to go to her room and not to disturb them, claiming that she wouldn't understand what they were talking about anyway, but here, everyone included the children in their conversations and preparations and no one had sent anyone away so far.

“And you must be Jenny,” the tall man now had come over to her, exposing a toothy grin. “The last time I saw you, you were still in your diapers,” the man gushed, excitement clear to hear in his voice.

Thankfully Gus and Luke had prepared her for this Thanksgiving meal the previous night and had told her about all the guests that would be coming, so she had been prepared and knew all about Emmett's lively persona. 'His flame is shining brightly' Gus had said and now that she saw him, she understood what he had meant.

“Yes, I am. It's nice to meet you,” Jenny said, not quite sure how to react to this man that knew her, but that she had no recollection of at all. She had been too young when her mothers had moved her and Gus away to Canada.

“Polite and beautiful,” Emmett grinned. “Now if that isn't a perfect mix.” He was still smiling widely when he took her hand and led her away from the kitchen that was getting pretty crowded by now and towards the much quieter living-room. “Everyone here calls me Auntie Em, so that would be me. Your Auntie who will plan the perfect event for you, be it a birthday party, a wedding or a family Thanksgiving feast. Party planner extraordinaire, but also a very good listener and pretty good at giving advice. So if you ever need someone to talk to or to ask for advice, just call me, okay?”

Jenny nodded, smiling back at the man. “Thanks.”

“Oh honey, nothing to thank me for. You're family. Once you get over how crazy we all are, you will love this family.”

“I think I already do,” she said honestly, feeling like she could tell him the truth.

“That's good, honey. Everyone is so happy that you're here. It wouldn't do for you to not enjoy your time with us. Let me know if there's anything I can do, okay? Even if it's just to take you out of this house for a while to get a bit of a break.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it, but I think so far I can still cope,” Jenny chuckled, enjoying talking to this man who just like everyone else seemed very welcoming.

They were interrupted by Brian who made his way over to them. “Honeycutt, are you scaring her?”

“Don't call me Honeycutt,” Emmett said in mock anger, before he turned to Jenny. “As if she would be scared of me. Old Auntie Em. Seriously...If anything, she should be scared of you, Big Bad!”

Brian actually snorted at that. “You have no idea. According to Gus and Luke we have already scarred her for life as well.”

“Oh no,” Emmett gasped as his hand flew to his mouth. He then turned to Jenny with wide eyes. “You caught them in the act?” His face then broke out into the biggest smile possible. “You're really a member of our family now.”

“Kissing,” Brian clarified, glaring at Emmett for jumping to conclusions. “Contrary to public opinion, Sunshine and I know how to behave.”

“Pft,” Emmett rolled his eyes. “Baby knows how to behave. All hope is lost for you and has been for years.”

“Why does everyone always think he's the innocent one and I am the evil one?” Brian frowned. “I thought we would have disabused everyone of that notion years ago.”

“It's the blue eyes, blond hair and his youthful looks,” Emmett shot back right away. “Everyone knows you're the bad influence.”

Brian shook his head, then turned to Jenny. “See what I am up against in this family?”

She couldn't help but laugh when he dramatically rolled his eyes to underline his statement. Before she could reply, the doorbell rang again.

“That must be Mother Taylor,” Brian said, before he headed towards the door.

“Justin's mom,” Emmett supplied for Jenny. “She's really nice. You'll love her. And she's your namesake.”

Jenny nodded, already having heard about Grandma Jen from her brother and his siblings.

“Honey, I better get started on setting the table or Big Bad will have my ass. If you need anything, just holler, okay?” Emmett said, before he headed off towards the dining-room.

Jenny nodded after him, then made her way back to the kitchen where she watched everyone welcome Grandma Jen. She saw the blond woman who had to be Grandma Jen give a hug to her son, after hugging her grandchildren. She then greeted Debbie and Carl and called out a greeting to Emmett in the other room. Once again everyone seemed to get on really well and there was a sense of familiarity between all these people that Jenny had never experienced herself with anyone else.

“Grandma Jen, this is Jenny, my sister,” Gus introduced her as he came over to where Jenny stood with the elegant woman by his side.

“It's nice to meet you, Mrs Taylor,” Jenny greeted the woman, who was smiling at her warmly.

“Oh, none of that, Jenny. Mrs Taylor is my former mother in law and believe me, she's not someone I like. Just call me Grandma Jen like everyone else does. You're family.”

“Are you adopting even more grandkids, Mother Taylor?” Brian winked as he walked by to get the door once more as it rang again.

“Ignore him,” Jennifer chuckled. “You're Gus' sister, Gus is my grandson, so in my book that makes you my granddaughter, too. End of story!”

Jenny nodded, feeling quite overwhelmed by how welcoming everyone was to her. Noticing her slight discomfort, Jennifer smiled at her gently. “Don't worry, Jenny. You will get used to us. We might look like a crazy bunch, but you couldn't find better people anywhere.”

“It's just that everyone is so welcoming and... you don't even know me,” Jenny began. “And my parents...”

“Oh honey, of course we are. You're part of the family. And you're not your parents. If anyone knows about the burden of bad parents, Brian and Justin would and they would be the last people to judge anyone by their parents' behaviour. And they would never allow us to do it either. You are Gus' sister, Debbie's granddaughter. That's enough for us to welcome you into the family.”

“Thanks, I really appreciate it,” Jenny said sincerely as she met the older woman's gaze which was full of warmth.

“I better go and help with the food, but why don't you and Gus come by some time before the weekend is over? Maybe we can have brunch together or something,” Jennifer offered, turning to Gus and kissing his cheek. “I've really missed you, honey and Justin mentioned how proud he was of your latest work.”

“I am sure that can be arranged,” Gus agreed, hugging his grandmother close. “I'll show you some pictures later, but just so you're warned, he's biased.”

“Honey, you know that he isn't. He's really proud of your work and thinks that you're a brilliant artist. And quite frankly, I agree with him,” she smiled at her grandson, then moved towards the counter where Debbie was busy directing tasks.

Gus rolled his eyes, but then smiled at Jenny. “He's my father. Of course he has to say that he likes my stuff. And as my grandmother, she has to as well.”

“I don't think they would say it was great if they didn't really believe so,” Jenny said, honestly believing that they wouldn't. “They all strike me as pretty honest.”

“They are. Honest to a fault,” Gus agreed. “But they are great, all of them. I wouldn't change anything about them.”

“What did she mean when she said that your fathers knew all about bad parents? She doesn't seem like a bad parent to me,” Jenny mused and watched how Jennifer interacted with everyone else in the kitchen, most of all with her son. She could see from the interactions and smiles that there was some real closeness between Justin and his mother. And from what she had heard from Gus before, she also seemed close with Brian.

“Papa's father,” Gus sighed. “And Dad's parents... it's a long story. She is awesome though. Papa and her are really close, as are Dad and her. And she's also a pretty cool grandma. Even though I am not her biological grandchild like Luke and Vicky are, she has never treated me any differently. She's always treated me just the same. You will love her when you get to know her better.”

Jenny was just about to reply to that when she saw a big smile spread on Gus' face. “That's Uncle Teddy and Uncle Blake. The last ones you have to meet.” He took her hand and pulled her towards the men that were talking with his father in the hallway.

Gus had told her about Ted and Blake the night before and she knew that Ted was Luke's godfather and Blake was Gus' godfather. He had mentioned that Ted worked with his father and was a partner in his company and that he loved them both very much.

“Ted, Blake!” Gus exclaimed as he made his way over and hugged first one, then the other man.

“Gus!” Both men greeted, hugging him back. “How are you? How is New York?”

“Loud, busy, you know it,” Gus shrugged, then nodded towards Jenny. “You've heard about Jenny? My sister?”

“Right,” Ted nodded, before he turned to the girl. “Brian has told us about your visit. He said it's the reason he couldn't sign off on the Christmas bonuses yet,” the older man chuckled.

“No talking about work, honey! You know the rules,” the younger man by his side, Blake, interjected, before holding out his hand to her in greeting. “It's nice to meet you Jenny. We've heard so much about you.”

“Same here. Gus has told me so much about you,” Jenny gave back with a smile.

“I hope only good things,” Ted joked and everyone laughed when Brian muttered 'My son is not a liar, Theodore'.

“Only the best,” Jenny confirmed. “It's nice to finally be able to put a face to the stories he's told me.”

“Well, that's everyone now,” Brian said, opening his arms wide and turning towards the kitchen, the living-room and the hallway, all the places where people were gathered in his house. “Meet your crazy Pittsburgh family.”

Chapter 10

“Oh, I am sorry. I didn't think anyone would be out here,” Jenny immediately apologised when she realised that someone was sitting in one of the deck-chairs by the pool that was now covered with a plastic cover for winter. As it was already dark outside, she didn't immediately recognise the person sitting by the pool, wearing a winter jacket, looking out at the pool, apparently deep in thought.

“No need to apologise,” a deep voice answered which she immediately recognised as Brian's voice. She saw him turn towards her with a frown on his face. “What are you doing out here in this cold?”

She shrugged, but didn't reply.

“It's okay,” Brian said quietly. “You don't have to explain. It's probably the same I am doing.” He pointed towards the other empty deck-chairs. “Sit down.”

“What are you doing?” Jenny asked, not quite sure she understood what he had been refering to.

“Taking a break, enjoying some solitude for a few minutes. They can be a lot to take in,” he finished, nodding towards the house where they could hear conversation and laughter behind the windows.

“They are your family. I thought you love them,” Jenny pointed out, sitting down in the chair next to Brian's.

“I do,” Brian agreed, turning towards Jenny with a smile on his face. “Doesn't mean though that I don't need a break from them at times.” He raised an eyebrow as he locked gazes with her. “You okay?”

“Yeah,” Jenny sighed, pulling her jacket tighter around her body.

“It's just a lot to take in, I know. And they are a lot to take in. No need to explain,” Brian nodded, watching her in concern. “I still feel that way at times, even 15, 20 years later.”

Jenny was silent for several minutes, but somehow felt that she had to explain herself. Even though Brian had said that there was no need to explain, she felt like she had to. She didn't want to seem ungrateful after everyone had welcomed her into the family and had been so nice to her.

“Everyone's been really nice and welcoming... it's just that...,” she started, but then wasn't quite sure how to continue.

“You're not used to family celebrations like this,” Brian offered and nodded in understanding when Jenny nodded to confirm that he had been right.

“No... It's always been just me and my mom and... we never even had a Thanksgiving dinner. Most years she would be busy working on one case or another and I would be left with the task of ordering some takeout for us. That would be as festive as we'd get...”

Brian looked at her, his eyes warm with understanding. “This is really Justin. He loves these big family celebrations, getting everyone together, spending holidays with your loved ones. If it were up to me,” he shrugged.

“You don't like it?” Jenny asked, feeling honestly surprised by that. She hadn't gotten the feeling earlier that Brian hadn't enjoyed dinner. Quite on the contrary, he had seemed to have a good time just like everyone else.

“No, I do. I guess after years of being part of this family, I can see the appeal, but... much like you... in my family, growing up, there wasn't much celebration on Thanksgiving or for other holidays. Until Justin and the kids, I'd make my short appearance at Debbie's dinner and that would be it. I'd then go back home and...,” Brian stopped, not sure if this was something he should be sharing with a 17-year old. He would have gone home, would have gotten drunk and high and would have fucked some nameless tricks. “Well, they were different times.”

“Do you miss them?” Jenny asked, looking at the older man in the chair next to her.

Brian laughed softly, then shook his head. “No, I don't. They can't compare to what I have now with Justin and the kids.”

“So why are you here, outside on your own and not inside with them?” Jenny couldn't help but ask, then looked at Brian apologetically. “Sorry, that's none of my business.”

“It's a fair question,” Brian shrugged. “Why are you here outside on your own?”

If Jenny noticed that Brian had cleverly redirected the conversation to her, she didn't mention it. “I just needed a couple of minutes. It's a lot to take in. I am not used to having so many people care about how I am doing, if I am having a good time...”

“Yeah, same here. Even after all these years, it still gets a bit much at times. I guess all these years of not celebrating holidays at all have fucked me up more than I'd like to admit. Sitting there, with all of them, looking at Gus, Luke and Vicky, seeing how much they enjoy spending holidays with their family... I can't help but think back to when I was a kid and how different it was in my family. I am happy that they are having these celebrations and that Justin and the grandmas insist on them, but yeah... I can't help but think back to other Thanksgivings and what they were like...”

“Jennifer mentioned that you and Justin had your own experience with bad parents,” Jenny said, not sure if it was the right thing to say.

“That would be the understatement of the year,” Brian snorted. “Leave it to Mother Taylor to still be PC when talking about that.” He shook his head in amusement. “My parents were the kind of people that should have never had children. To be fair, my father never wanted to and told my mother to have an abortion, but she refused, being a good Catholic girl and all...My father was an abusive drunk who showed his displeasure with his fists and my mother was a religious nutjob who cared more about Jesus and going to mass than about her drunk husband hitting her children.”

“I am sorry,” Jenny whispered, not having expected that.

“It's not your fault,” Brian shrugged. “And it was a long time ago. But yeah, that didn't leave much time for family celebrations in our house. So every time people talked about their favourite holiday traditions or what they were looking forward to before the holidays... I just talked about some bullshit I'd seen in a movie or a magazine. Telling people that you hoped to make it through the holidays without broken bones didn't really make for a good story.”

“I used to do the same. Well, I mean not the broken bones and stuff, my mom has never hit me, but...we never had any traditions either, so I just talked about something I had seen in a movie instead,” Jenny admitted.

“And now you're here, sucked into our holiday festivities,” Brian chuckled. “It's overwhelming.”

“It is and...,” Jenny sighed, but didn't continue.

“And?” Brian asked, looking at her from concerned eyes. When she stayed silent, he continued with what he guessed she was feeling. “And now you're scared of enjoying it too much in case it will never happen again.”

After the longest time, Jenny just nodded.

“Don't worry about that. You're part of this family now, Jenny. Your grandmother would have all our asses if we didn't make sure to include you in all festivities from now on.”

“But what if my mom doesn't allow me to come here again?”

Brian could hear the worry in Jenny's voice and knew that this was a real concern of hers.

“You'll be 18 soon. Once you are, it won't matter what she wants or doesn't want and until then... we'll figure something out. You're not on your own anymore, Jenny. You have a family now,” Brian said quietly, his gaze meeting hers.

“That's a lot to process,” she admitted.

“I know. That's why I still come out here even after 15 years...”

Before Brian could continue, they were interrupted by Justin's voice. “Hey, what are you two doing out here?”

Brian turned around and saw him standing behind the deck-chairs, rubbing his shoulders to keep warm.

“Talking. Come here, you must be freezing.”

“Because it is freezing,” Justin gave back, but made his way over anyway, settling in front of Brian, leaning into him when he opened his jacket and wrapped it around Justin's shoulders as well. “I expected to find you here,” he said with a look towards his husband, “but I didn't expect to see you out here as well,” he finished as he looked at Jenny. “You okay?”

Jenny nodded, but it was Brian who answered. “We were just talking.”

Justin heard something in Brian's voice that told him that he had it under control and that he would tell Justin later, so he just nodded in response.

“You okay?” He asked next, raising his head, so he could meet Brian's eyes. By now he was well-used to Brian's tendency to disappear for a while during a family celebration. This wasn't the first time and Justin had found his husband outside during several Christmas and Thanksgiving dinners before. He knew why Brian disappeared outside, knew why Brian needed that time to himself and as long as he knew that his husband was okay, he didn't mind giving him that time.

“Hmmmmm, just needed a couple of minutes to myself.”

“Can't you go somewhere warm to be by yourself? Your office, our room?” Justin muttered, leaning further into Brian's embrace, trying to get more body heat from his husband's chest that way.

“The cold air helps me think,” Brian replied seriously.

Justin sighed. “I know... I'd just feel better if I knew you weren't sitting out here in the cold by yourself.”

“I am not by myself,” Brian winked, nodding towards Jenny. “And I have barely been out here for 15 minutes.”

“You know what I mean,” Justin said, running his hand over Brian's thigh. “I worry,” he whispered, so that only Brian could hear him.

Brian pulled him closer, tightening his embrace around his husband. “You don't have to. I am okay. Just needed a couple of minutes.”

Justin nodded, before he pulled away from Brian and looked at him. “Come back inside, please.”

Brian nodded, leaning in for a quick kiss. “I will. Just give us two more minutes, okay?”

“Okay,” Justin agreed, as he got up and moved towards the door. He stopped when he felt Brian reach for his hand and hold it.

“I love you,” Brian said, meeting his gaze head-on and Justin saw nothing but honesty and sincerity in those eyes.

A smile spread on his face as it always did when he heard Brian say those three words to him. “I love you, too.”

He then returned inside to join the rest of their family again.

“We should head back inside. He will have my ass if I am not back in two minutes,” Brian chuckled as he turned back to look at Jenny.

“You two are amazing, you know?”

“Yeah, we are,” Brian agreed.

“You seem so in love and so in sync. I don't think I've ever seen a couple like you two,” Jenny said and Brian could almost hear the awe in her voice.

“There is no other couple like us,” Brian smirked, then slowly got up from his deck-chair. “We weren't always like this. It took hard work from both of us, but especially Justin, to get us here.”

“You really love him,” Jenny said, a smile on her face.

“More than life itself,” Brian admitted, then held out his hand to help her up. “But he deserves nothing less.”

They then headed back into the house, to re-join the Thanksgiving festivities that were still going on. The moment they came back into the dining-room, Jenny noticed how Justin's eyes immediately found Brian's and how their gazes stayed locked until Brian was seated next to his husband again. She watched as Justin happily leaned into Brian's side, smiling to herself as Brian placed a soft kiss on his husband's blond hair.

“Hey, there you are. I was looking for you. Are you okay?”


Jenny turned around and looked at Luke, who was coming over to her. She nodded. “Yeah. Yeah, I am.”

And she knew that she was. Yes, this week had been a lot to take in, but she had a feeling that she would do well in this family. Her family.

Chapter 11

The Friday after Thanksgiving had been a quiet day in the Kinney-Taylor household, as it usually was. The family tried to relax and move on from the food coma they had gotten themselves into the day before.

Everyone had slept in and after some fruit for breakfast, had moved to the living-room for some more rest and relaxation. They had watched a movie together, before Gus and Justin had disappeared to Justin's studio and Brian and Luke had gone out on a run, Brian claiming that he had to run off all the extra calories he had consumed the day before and Luke to stay in shape for his next soccer practice after the Thanksgiving break was over. Vicky had asked Jenny if she wanted to play with her and Jenny had agreed which was how the two of them had ended up in Vicky's room, playing a game on the floor.

When Vicky got thirsty, they stopped their game and moved into the kitchen. Jenny was surprised to find Gus and Justin there, having expected them to still be in the studio, but apparently their conversation about Gus' most recent work had moved into the kitchen where she could see several images lying on the table.

“Hey, you two. I was just preparing some leftovers from yesterday for lunch. Are you hungry?”

“Yes, Papa!” Vicky immediately nodded, walking over to look at what Justin was preparing.

“I could do with some lunch,” Jenny agreed as she made her way over as well.

“I was just preparing some turkey sandwiches. Hope that's okay. I think everyone's still too full to conquer the rest of Debbie's Lasagna,” Justin chuckled, looking at everyone in the kitchen.

“Don't even mention Lasagna or I'll puke,” Gus sighed, rolling his eyes. “I had way too much last night.”

“Sandwiches sound great,” Jenny said. “Is there anything I can do to help?”

Justin smiled at her, but shook his head. “Nah, don't worry. I was planning on preparing some extra ones anyway. Brian and Luke will probably be hungry when they come back from their run.”

She then moved over to the table and took a look at the images lying there while Justin continued getting sandwiches done for everyone.

“This looks really cool,” she said as she picked up an image of a black and white painting of two clasped hands holding onto each other tightly.

“Thanks,” Gus said, a small blush creeping up on his cheeks. “My professor wants to display it in the end of year show at the end of the semester.”

“You are really talented,” Jenny said seriously as she looked through the images on the table, taking in her brother's artwork.

“Thanks,” he accepted her praise shyly.

“Yes, thanks, Jenny! He never seems to believe me when I say that he is,” Justin said as he came over, putting two plates with sandwiches in front of them.

“You are my father. You're biased,” Gus gave back, rolling his eyes.

“And she's your sister,” Justin pointed out, shaking his head. “And you know I wouldn't say that your work was good if I didn't think so.”

Deep down Gus knew that Justin wouldn't lie to him. Justin had helped him with his art so much ever since he had been a young boy, had given him so much advice on how to improve his technique over the years and yes, there had been times when Justin had voiced that a certain piece wasn't really working for him, so deep down Gus knew that Justin wouldn't lie to him, but still... it was hard accepting praise from your father, especially if he was a world-renowned artist himself.

Before they could continue their conversation, they heard the door of the house opening, announcing the return of Brian and Luke.

A couple of seconds later, Luke came into the kitchen, making his way straight to the fridge to get a bottle of water.

“Where's your Dad?” Justin asked him when he couldn't see Brian coming into the kitchen with his son.

“Catching his breath,” Luke answered after he had taken a huge gulp of water.

“You didn't overdo it, did you?” Justin asked, his voice immediately sounding concerned.

“Stop fretting, Sunshine. I am fine,” he heard his husband's reply, who was clearly still trying to catch his breath as he came into the kitchen as well.

“Gee, Brian. Are you okay?” Justin immediately made his way over to his sweating and wheezing husband. He rested his hand on Brian's chest, frowning when he noticed the rapid rise and fall of his chest. “You know not to overdo it like this.”

After taking a sip of water and trying to control his breathing some more, Brian glared at Justin. “I didn't overdo it. We just went out for a run.”

“And you're not 20 anymore,” Justin glared right back at his husband. “You don't have to keep up with Luke.”

“Papa, he's fine,” Luke said calmly, looking at his fathers from where he stood. “We took it slow.”

Now Brian glared at his son for admitting that they had taken it slow.

“If this is you taking it slow, I don't want to know what you'll look like after a normal run,” Justin huffed as he moved back to the counter where he had been preparing the sandwiches. “You know you're not supposed to overdo it.”

He grabbed one of the plates with a sandwich and took it over to where Brian was standing, handing it to him. “Turkey on wholewheat without mayo. Enjoy your lunch!”

Without another word he then left the kitchen and stormed off.

“Justin,” Brian called after the younger man and sighed when he didn't stop or reply. He put the plate down on the table, then made to follow his angry husband.

“You know he's just worried, Dad,” Gus said quietly, looking at his father from understanding eyes.

“He's overreacting,” his father just gave back, as he was about to leave the room. “It was just a run.”

“Can you blame him? After everything?” Gus asked with a frown. “He'll always worry.”

Brian met his son's eyes and nodded. “I know...” He then turned towards Luke and Vicky. “You guys have lunch, okay? If you need anything, Gus will take care of it.”

“Thanks, Dad!” Gus called after his father with a shake of his head as he left the kitchen.

Luke grabbed the plate with his sandwich and walked over to the table, plopping down into a chair next to his siblings. “We really took it slow. He didn't overdo it. I was careful that he wouldn't.”

“I know,” Gus sighed, before he took a bite out of his sandwich. “You know how Papa worries.”

“They will kiss and make up,” Vicky announced, once she had finished her sandwich. “They always do.”

“Exactly,” Gus nodded, putting on a smile and agreeing with his little sister. They always did. This wasn't the first time that Justin had worried about Brian overdoing it and Brian had gotten angry with him. It was actually one of the most common reasons they would argue and all three Kinney-Taylor children knew better than to worry about what they had just witnessed. Before long, their fathers would make up and would be as in love as they had ever been.

Once everyone had finished lunch, Luke went up to take a shower and Vicky asked Gus if she would be allowed to watch some TV which Gus allowed her to do. That left him and Jenny in the kitchen to clean up after lunch.

“I am sorry you had to see that,” Gus said as he picked up his father's sandwich and put some plastic wrap over it to keep it fresh. “Papa is always worried about Dad overdoing it when he exercises.”

“Your dad looks pretty fit and in good shape,” Jenny replied, not quite sure she understood why a simple run would cause this argument between the couple that had seemed so in love and in sync the whole time she had been staying with them.

“He is,” Gus agreed. “He had lung cancer though. A couple of years ago when he was pregnant with Vicky. They had to remove a big tumour and some part of his lung and ever since Papa is worrying about him every time he is out of breath.”

“Oh,” Jenny just said, not quite sure what to make of that information.

“He was in pretty bad shape and could have died and... his pulmonary function has never been a full 100% afterwards. He's supposed to take it easy and not overdo it, but... my Dad is stubborn and likes to pretend that everything is alright and he can just do whatever he wants as he used to before. And Papa worries about him, scared that he will overdo it... My Dad used to be on oxygen for a long time after they removed the tumour and... I guess Papa never really forgot what that was like,” Gus shrugged.

“That must have been scary,” Jenny said quietly, looking at her brother from understanding eyes.

“It was. At the time both my Dad and Vicky could have died and... it was pretty scary. But they both made it and they're both alright. It's all that matters.”

“I can't blame your father for being worried though, not after making it through that,” Jenny said quietly.

“I know,” Gus agreed, then sighed. “My Dad just doesn't like people worrying about him. And he's not really angry at Papa, he's mostly angry at himself because he knows that he worried him and shouldn't have. They will be fine. Just give them an hour and they will be back to normal.”

“Are you sure? Justin seemed pretty angry,” Jenny worried.

“They will be fine,” Gus assured her with a nod. “They always are.”

Jenny nodded, trusting Gus to know better than her. After all Gus said this had happened before and he knew his fathers better than she did.

They then decided to join Vicky in the living-room, watching some TV with her. Luke joined them a bit later as well and they all decided to watch a comedy that would be age appropriate for Vicky as well.

***

“Sunshine,” Brian sighed as he entered the master bedroom, not surprised to find Justin sitting on their bed, his head in his hands.

“Leave me alone,” the younger man muttered angrily, not even looking up at Brian when he spoke.

“You're overreacting. I am fine. It was just a run,” Brian said quietly as he made his way into the room.

Now Justin looked up and angrily glared at his husband. “I am overreacting? Fuck you, Brian! You were wheezing, barely able to catch your breath...”

“Because I was out on a run,” Brian gave back in exasperation. “What did you expect?”

“Maybe that you would take it slow and be careful because you know that you're missing part of your lung and that you're not 20 anymore,” Justin angrily gave back.

“We took it slow,” Brian said as he moved over to the bed and sat down next to Justin. “You've trained Luke so well, he wouldn't even dare to go on a run with me at the pace he'd usually go.”

When Justin just continued to glare at him, Brian shook his head in frustration.

“Give me some credit, Sunshine. Don't you think I know how fast I can go and when my body will stop cooperating? Don't you think I know how to read my body and when to take it slow?”

When Justin didn't reply, Brian moved a bit closer, bumping his shoulder against the younger man's.

“I know that you're worried, but you don't have to be. Do you really think I would overdo it? While I am out on a run with Luke? Do you think I'd put him into that situation? Do you really think I'd risk collapsing while out on a run with him?”

After the longest silence between them, Justin finally shook his head. “No.” And he knew that it was the truth. Brian would never put Luke into that situation. He would never put any of his family in that situation.

“I know that you worry, but you have to trust me, Sunshine. I am not overdoing it. It was just a simple run. I am fine.”

Justin hung his head. “I know.” After the longest time he turned to look at Brian. “You have no idea what hearing you wheeze like that, gasping for breath, does to me...I get so scared that...”

When Justin didn't continue, Brian wrapped his arms around the younger man and pulled him closer. “Hey, you're only driving yourself crazy. I am fine, Sunshine. You know that I am.”

And it was true, Brian was healthy and all his tests ever since he had beaten the cancer had come back negative, but that didn't mean that the cancer couldn't come back one day. They both knew better than to believe that.

“I know,” Justin sighed, resting his head on Brian's shoulder. “I know that it's irrational, but I can't help it. Hearing you catching your breath just worries me.”

“Just know that I would never overdo it. I've learned my lesson. I know what I can and can't do. And I would never put Luke into a position like that. Never!”

“I am sorry,” Justin whispered, giving Brian's thigh a squeeze. “I caused quite a scene, huh?”

“They all know that you're only worried. In fact Gus reminded me of that before I went up here,” Brian chuckled. “They know us so well.”

“I didn't mean to make you angry. I overreacted and …”

“And I overreacted to you overreacting. We make quite a pair,” Brian chuckled as he gave Justin's shoulder a squeeze.

“That we do,” Justin agreed with a smile on his face.

“I know that you worry, Sunshine,” Brian continued after a couple of minutes of comfortable silence between them. “And I know that you'll never stop, because I never stop worrying about you and the kids either. It's just who we are...Just try to trust me, okay?”

“I do,” Justin said sincerely, before he leaned back from Brian's embrace. “I do... It's just that sometimes I am not perfect and overreact anyway.”

“Then it's good that I love you, imperfections and all.”

As Justin was about to respond, Brian leaned in for a gentle kiss. “And you're allowed to worry. Actually, it warms my heart to know that you care so much...,” he admitted once their kiss ended.

“As if you're any better,” Justin snorted, then held out his hand. Brian immediately took it and started massaging it, almost automatically. “See? I didn't even paint anything today and here you are massaging it.”

“It's second nature by now to worry about your hand,” Brian admitted, never stopping his gentle massage. “I can't help it.”

“Even though you know that I wouldn't overdo it and know when to stop before it gets too much,” Justin pointed out.

“Yes, even despite that,” Brian sighed. “And I've had 19 years to get used to that worry, you only had 6.”

Justin snorted, looking at his hand in Brian's. “I don't think I ever will...”

“Neither have I,” Brian admitted, then let go of Justin's hand. “I'll always worry and just like I know I will, I know that you will as well. I'll just need to get used to the fact that you're just worrying and not overreacting.”

“We really make quite a pair... It's a good thing we ended up with each other. I don't think anyone else would have had the patience,” Justin whispered, before he leaned in for another kiss.

“And I thank God every day that we made it work,” Brian replied, pulling Justin close.

“So do I,” the younger man agreed into the kiss.

Once the kiss ended, Brian pulled back. “You really must love me. Kissing me like this... I must stink,” he made a face as he looked down his sweaty shirt.

“As if there was any doubt after all these years,” Justin laughed, before he helped Brian get out of his sweaty shirt. He ran a hand over the scar on Brian's chest, gently caressing it. “How about you show me how much you love me while I join you for your shower?”

“I can definitely do that,” Brian said huskily, then got up and pulled Justin up with him and towards their ensuite bathroom.

Half an hour later, they came out of the bathroom again, got dressed and made their way downstairs again to check how the kids were doing.

They both grabbed their plates with their sandwiches, then joined the kids in the living-room. They didn't notice how Gus nudged Jenny once they had settled in each other's embrace on the sofa, eating their sandwiches, while their bodies were as connected as they could be in front of the kids.

“See?” he said as he nodded towards his fathers. “I told you they would be fine.”

Jenny nodded, watching with a smile as the two men leaned in for a kiss once they had finished their sandwiches. Everything seemed back to normal between them and she was glad for it. Even though they weren't her fathers, she liked them and wanted them to be happy, not fighting. And it made her glad for her brother to know that he had been right about his fathers and knew them well enough to know that even a fight like that wouldn't be anything that wouldn't be forgotten within an hour.

Chapter 12

The rest of Friday had been quiet. Gus had gone out in the evening to meet with some friends from school that were home for Thanksgiving as well, catching up with the ones he didn't usually see much anymore as everyone now went to different universities and colleges all over the country.

Once Vicky had been in bed, Brian and Justin had excused themselves for the rest of the night and Jenny and Luke had spent the rest of the evening playing video games.

Now they had made it to Saturday afternoon after a quiet morning and were ready to talk about Jenny's future. As they had previously decided with Debbie and Carl, they had agreed to meet after Thanksgiving to talk about what options they had.

Jennifer had offered to watch Vicky and Luke was out with some of his soccer teammates, which left Gus, Jenny, Brian and Justin as well as Debbie and Carl who had come over for the conversation.

Brian had started their talk by summarising what the lawyer had said concerning their situation, that Melanie couldn't really come after them for kidnapping or anything like that as Jenny had run away of her own free will and had not been coerced in any way to stay with them. He also mentioned the current custody situation which meant that Melanie had sole custody, but with Jenny already being 17, her opinion definitely mattered.

“Can she force me to go back with her?” Jenny asked, looking around at the adults in the room.

“Legally, yes,” Brian said, before he continued. “But we don't know if it would even come to that. So far she hasn't even been in contact once and it has been three days already since Sunshine came back.”

“What if Jenny doesn't want to go back with her?” Gus asked, looking at his fathers for advice.

“Well, should it come to that, we can always get a lawyer involved as well and look what our options would be,” Justin replied.

“Meaning?” Gus frowned, not sure he understood what his father was talking about.

“I think we would have a pretty good case arguing that Melanie is not what one would consider a good mother and that Jenny would be better off staying with her family in Pittsburgh. We could argue that Melanie didn't even notice her absence for several days and if it's Jenny's wish to stay here, I am sure that would also have some weight,” Justin went on explaining.

“I want to stay here,” Jenny added quietly, looking at everyone around the table. “I know I don't really know you, but even after just these couple of days I already feel more welcome here than I ever did with my mom... I want to get to know my family and find out more about who I really am. My mom never told me the truth and … I think I want to know it and want to know who I really am.”

“Honey, you are always welcome here,” Debbie immediately said. “We are your family and we'll always love having you around. You will always have a place to stay with me and Carl.”

“Or with us,” Justin added with an encouraging nod.

“Should the situation arise, I think we might have a better chance of success should Debbie and Carl contest the current custody situation. They are your biological grandparents and with Carl being a former police officer that should vouch for their characters,” Brian pointed out, looking at Jenny. “Which doesn't mean that you're not welcome here. Like Sunshine said, you'll always have a place with us here. You're Gus' sister and as such you're family.”

“I... I don't know what to say,” Jenny stammered. “You're all so nice and helpful.”

Before anyone could reply to that, they heard the doorbell ringing. Justin looked up with a frown and Brian shook his head in reply. No, they weren't expecting anyone else as far as he knew. Maybe it was one of Luke's or Gus' friends looking for them. He got up and left everyone to see who was standing outside their door. When he opened the door, he wished that he hadn't and that Justin had gone instead.

“What do you want here?”

“I want my daughter. Now!” A furious Melanie announced as she glared at him, not even bothering with any kind of greeting after all these years of not having seen each other. “I told Justin in no uncertain terms that I expected her on the first flight back to Florida, but she still hasn't been returned to me.”

“Returned to you?” Brian couldn't help but snort. “What is she? A possession?”

“None of your concern. That's what she is,” Melanie spat, pushing past him into the entrance hall of Britin. “JR! JR, come here!” She started calling for her daughter, not even caring that Brian hadn't invited her in so far.

A second later, Justin showed up in the hallway as well, looking from Melanie to Brian, then back to Melanie. “Melanie,” he greeted her coldly. “We weren't expecting you.”

“After not returning my daughter to me even though I told you that I expected her back home days ago?” Melanie scoffed.

“Yes, days ago,” Brian interjected. “You didn't seem to care so far, so colour us surprised that you seem to care now.”

“Brian,” Justin said quietly, trying to calm his husband down. He could see by one look at Brian's face and whole stance how angry his husband was. Not that he could blame him or that he felt much different, but he had a feeling that they would need to stay calm for everyone's sake.

Brian had gotten the message though and just nodded back at Justin, not saying anything more for the moment. He couldn't promise though that he would stay calm for long.

“Where is she?” Melanie asked, looking at Justin from angry eyes.

“She's spending some time with her family, her brother and her grandparents,” Justin said calmly, nodding towards the living-room where everyone was gathered. “Why don't you come and join us and we talk about this quietly.”

“Yes, why don't you come inside and join us?” Brian scoffed, looking at Melanie with fake politeness.

“I just want my daughter and then I am out of here. She doesn't have family here.”

“I beg to differ,” Justin replied. “Gus is her brother and Debbie and Carl are her grandparents. You might not like it, but you can't deny that fact.”

“He is nothing to her, they're not even related. And you had no right to introduce her to Debbie,” Melanie fumed, as she stomped over towards where Justin had nodded earlier.

“I think you will find that your own daughter will disagree with you,” Brian muttered as he followed everyone into the living-room.

Melanie didn't acknowledge anyone in the room and just directed her gaze to Jenny. “JR, pack your things. Now!”

“No,” Jenny said, looking up at her angry mother from where she was sitting between Gus and Debbie who had moved closer to her once they had heard Melanie's yelling from the hallway.

“JR! I said go and pack your things. I don't have time for one of your tantrums.”

“Now calm down a minute,” Debbie started, looking at Melanie angrily. “You can't speak to her like that.”

“How I speak to my daughter is none of your concern,” Melanie shot back.

“Of course it is, she is my granddaughter and if you can't treat her with the respect that she deserves, you better turn around and get your ass out of this house right now,” Debbie gave back without pause.

“What? Do you want me to pamper her like you pampered Michael? We all know how that ended, don't we?” Melanie scoffed, before she turned back to her daughter. “Now, JR! We have a plane to catch. I already lost too much time on this newest tantrum of yours. You know I have a big case coming up.”

Several people were about to speak at once, including Brian and Justin, but it was Gus' voice that stood out above all else. “How dare you speak to Grandma Debs like that?”

“Gus, honey,” Debbie started, but Gus just shook his head.

“No, she can't just come here and throw around accusations like that.” He then turned towards Melanie. “You don't have the right to accuse anyone of anything.”

“Why am I not surprised that no one ever taught you to keep your mouth shut when adults are talking,” Melanie shook her head.

Before Gus could reply something to that, Justin had stepped in front of her, glaring at her from icy blue eyes. “If you ever talk to my son that way again, you will regret it! He has every right to speak his mind in whatever way he wants.”

“And in case you forgot, which I wouldn't even put past you with how little you obviously cared about me, I am 20. I am an adult!” Gus shot back right after, now getting up and stepping next to Justin.

“I think it's time for you to leave,” Brian announced unceremoniously, walking up to Melanie's side as well. “You're not welcome here, so get out of our house!”

“Now if that isn't quite the image,” Melanie huffed as she looked from one man to the other, then settled her eyes on Justin. “Your son? My ass! He is no more your son than he was ever mine.”

“How dare you?” Brian hissed, taking a step closer towards her.

“He is more my father than you have ever been my mother,” Gus replied calmly, meeting Melanie's gaze head-on. “And I think my Dad is right, you should leave. You're not welcome here.”

“Oh, I will leave. I have no intention of staying here. Get your things, JR. I can't wait to get out of here.”

“Jenny will stay,” Gus said, his voice dangerously low. “She told you that she doesn't want to go with you.”

“And I don't care. I am still her mother and have custody. She has no right to be here. She is to go where I tell her to go which is back home.”

Gus just shook his head and snorted. “Do you even care that she doesn't want to go with you? That she prefers staying with people she hardly knows to going back with you? You know... I thought it was just me, that you couldn't love me because of who my father was, but now I am not so sure anymore. You seem to have no idea what being a mother is about and how to be one. No wonder she doesn't want to go back with you. You are a horrible person!”

“How dare you speak to me like that?” Melanie angrily shouted, apparently looking ready to lunge at Gus any second.

“He has every right to speak to you in whatever way he wishes to after what you put him through,” Brian hissed, stepping right in front of her. “And you better think very well before you even think about attacking my son. You will not like the consequences.”

“Guys, why don't we all calm down?” Carl interjected, walking over to where the standoff took place, trying to get in position between Brian and Melanie, trying to avoid the situation getting out of hand completely. As it seemed, no one was paying attention to him though.

“What I put him through? More like what you put him through. You're the one that sued for custody.”

“Because you wouldn't let me see him. What did you expect me to do?” Brian gave back, his face red with anger. “You're the one that left without as much as a goodbye. And that's the one thing he will always remember about you. That you left and couldn't be bothered to even say goodbye.”

“He seemed fine with Justin leaving without as much as a goodbye. Looks like they seem pretty close anyway.”

“Excuse me?” Justin's voice rose and he looked at Melanie as if she had just lost her mind.

“Oh, don't play innocent with me. Sitting on your high horse, acting like you're all holy and sanctimonious when we all know that you're no better. Who stopped coming to Canada to see him? Who didn't care about Gus missing him? You think you're so much better than me? Well, I don't remember you saying goodbye to him either or staying in contact. So don't tell me you care about him when you made it awfully clear that you didn't.”

“How dare you?” Brian shouted again, ready to lunge. “You know that's not what happened!”

“Brian,” Justin said quietly, reaching out a hand to put it on Brian's arm, trying to restrain his husband. He could see that Brian was this close to exploding and he knew that Melanie had made a terrible mistake by accusing him of being no better than herself. She had no idea that she had just pushed the wrong button with Brian, reminding him of that time in their lives, a time Brian still regretted terribly and felt awfully guilty about. Brian was well aware of the role he had played back then and would never allow anyone to blame Justin for anything that had happened back then. Justin knew that, but it was very obvious that Melanie didn't. Or maybe she did and had done it on purpose. Justin wasn’t sure if she would be that stupid and suicidal though. “Don't,” he whispered, tightening his grip on Brian's arm.

When Brian's eyes locked with his, Justin could see the inner struggle in his husband. He just kept their eyes locked, then shook his head slowly. She wasn't worth it. She wasn't worth getting in trouble for. As much as he could understand Brian's desire to lash out, she just wasn't worth it.

After the longest time Brian nodded. He then closed his eyes for a second, before he turned to Melanie once more. “OUT! Get out of my house! I don't want to see your fucking face ever again!”

“What? The truth hurts?” Melanie laughed bitterly. “Just because he bent over for you and forgave you, doesn't mean we all forgot what you did. Don't act like you're such a good father when you cost your son years with his father.”

“Carl, if you don't get her out of my house right now, I will not be held responsible for my actions,” Brian warned with a look to the former police officer, who immediately understood the seriousness of the situation. Just like Justin had realised that Melanie had pushed the wrong buttons, he had realised it as well. And he had no doubt that Brian meant every word. If Melanie didn't get out of here soon, Carl wasn't sure he would be able to stop Brian with the way she kept pushing his buttons.

“Melanie, I think you should leave now,” he said with as much authority as he could muster, gently reaching for her arm and guiding her out of the room.

“I will not leave without my daughter,” Melanie angrily yelled at him, struggling to get out of his grip.

“She doesn't want to go with you. She made that very clear,” he just gave back as he continued to lead her towards the front door.

“You have no right to keep me from my daughter. I have custody and she's underage.”

“And you didn't even notice she was gone for several days. Yes, I know the story. The whole story. Melanie, let me give you some advice: If you continue down this road that you're on right now, you will lose her for good.”

“You know nothing about me or my daughter,” Melanie gave back, looking angrily at Carl.

“I know enough to know that your daughter doesn't want to be with you. And I know that she is old enough to have her wishes respected.”

“She is underage and I didn't give her permission to come here.”

“You do realise that you will lose her for good if you force her to come back with you now, don't you? She doesn't want to be with you. She wants to get to know her family here. What harm is there in that?”

“I don't want her interacting with people like him,” she spat the last word, making it clear who she was refering to.

“You are doing him wrong, Melanie. He is a great father and loves his children very much,” Carl said quietly, looking at Melanie intently.

“Yeah, why am I not surprised that mighty God Kinney has you in his pockets as well. How much did he pay you to overlook his past, huh?”

“He didn't have to pay me anything,” Carl shot back. “I have eyes in my head and I recognise a good person when I see one.” He left the implications of that statement open, but it was clear that he didn't consider Melanie a good person.

“I want my daughter to come back with me now. I will not leave here without her,” Melanie said, not even reacting to what Carl had previously said.

“She will not go back with you, Melanie. Either you accept that and we all start trying to come to a solution together or you will lose her for good.”

“A solution? I know the solution: My daughter will come home with me. Now!”

Carl just shook his head. “She will not, Melanie. Let me ask you something: Why are you so intent on taking her back with you? You didn't notice that she was gone for days even though we tried getting in contact with you. You didn't come here for three days even though you knew exactly where she was and apparently have such a big problem with it. And now you want her to come back with you even though you've told us repeatedly that you have a big trial coming up, are busy and don't have time for her. So why are you so intent on taking her back when she is surrounded by a loving family here?”

“This is not her family. And I don't want her hanging out with the lot of you.”

Carl was about to say something but was interrupted by Justin's appearance in the hallway. His voice was ice cold when he spoke.

“You accuse me of being sanctimonious, you accuse Brian of things you have no idea about, you lash out at my son and think you have a right to? Let me make one thing very clear, Melanie: The only person that is sanctimonious is you! You act like you’re so much better than anyone else, but are you really? You accuse me of having left Gus without a goodbye when it was your wife who told me to go! I didn’t hear you say anything about that. I didn’t hear you say anything about Brian’s pregnancy and Luke to me either. How dare you act like you’re so much better than anyone else when you lied to me just the same as everyone! You are no different, Melanie, but unlike them, you don’t see anything wrong with your behavior and just accuse everyone else instead of taking responsibility for your actions. You’re the one who left Gus even though Brian wanted you to stay in contact and wanted you to have visitation. You are the one who continued reading my contracts even after my son was born and never mentioned him with one word to me. You are the one who continued lying to me for years. Lindsay was already in prison, Gus was already living with Brian, but you still replied to my emails in which I asked about the kids and Lindsay that everyone was doing fine and things were great. The next time you want to accuse anyone of anything, take a good look in the mirror first!”

When Melanie was about to reply something to what Justin had just said, he just shook his head and continued.

“You should leave, Melanie. You caused enough trouble for one day. You are not welcome here. You will hear from our lawyer concerning Jenny's custody on Monday.”

“You have no right,” Melanie started angrily, but was stopped by Justin right away.

“Jenny doesn't want to go with you and we won't force her. As Carl has told you several times already, we respect Jenny's wishes. On Monday our lawyer will get in contact, but believe me, we will do whatever it takes so she will never have to go back to you ever again.”

“You have no right,” Melanie spat, but once again Justin had no intention of listening to anything she was about to say.

“Maybe, maybe not. I'll leave that with the judges to decide. Now leave. If you're not gone in the next 60 seconds, we will call the police for trespassing. I am sure Carl can confirm that we have asked you several times to leave our house.”

Carl nodded. “You should leave, Melanie. Don't cause even more trouble.”

“You will hear from me again. Don't think that this is over,” Melanie spat as she turned towards the door.

“I am sure it won't be,” Justin sighed, as he watched after her as she stormed out of the house. Once he was sure that she was in her car and driving off, he closed the door and leaned against it with a deep sigh.

“Are you okay, son?” Carl asked, looking at Justin in concern.

Justin nodded slowly, before he met the older man's gaze. “Can she call the police on us? Because we refused to let Jenny go with her?”

Carl ran a hand over his face, taking a deep breath. “I guess, but she would only cause more of a rift with Jenny if she did that.”

“I don't think it's Jenny she really cares about,” Justin said sadly, not surprised when Carl nodded in agreement.

“Justin, I think it might be best if Jenny stays with us for the time being,” Carl said carefully, gauging Justin's reaction to his statement. When the younger man just frowned at him, he continued. “If Melanie's problem is Brian and your family, maybe it's best to take all of you out of the equation.”

“Carl,” Justin sighed, shaking his head. “Jenny came here to get to know Gus and to spend time with him. I don't think we should send her away just because of some trouble that Melanie might be causing.”

“Gus will go back to New York tomorrow anyway, won't he? And just because she's staying with us doesn't mean she can't spend time with you guys anymore. You know how much time Debbie spends here anyway. You heard what Brian said earlier, if it comes to a custody hearing, we might have more chance of success than you and Brian, being her biological grandparents. And with Jenny staying with us, it won't matter if Melanie wants to come after you guys or not.”

Justin listened to what Carl had to say and nodded slowly, knowing that the man was most likely right.

“I just don't want her to feel like she isn't welcome here because of her mother.”

“She's smart, I am sure she will understand.”

Justin nodded once more, then started to walk towards the living-room with Carl right behind him. He frowned when he entered the room and found only Debbie and Jenny there, Jenny hiding in Debbie's arms, clearly crying and upset.

“Where are Brian and Gus?” Justin asked, knowing that they had still been in the room when he had left a couple of minutes ago.

When Debbie just shook her head, indicating that Justin shouldn't follow them and leave them alone for the moment, he nodded, even though everything in his body spoke against it. He wasn't surprised that Brian and Gus had disappeared, both of them needed time to work through their emotions and feelings on their own before they were ready to talk to anyone about them. While Justin prefered talking things over right away instead of letting them fester, he knew both his husband and son well enough to know that they were different and needed more time than he did before they were ready to talk about how they felt. And he would be willing to give them that time, knowing that when they were ready to talk to him, they would.

Instead he focused on Jenny, who seemed very upset. “Hey honey, are you okay?”

Jenny continued sobbing for a few minutes, allowing Justin to sit down beside her and run a gentle hand over her back. Once she had calmed down a bit, she pulled back from Debbie's embrace and looked at Justin from the most sorrowful eyes he had ever seen.

“I am so sorry. So sorry... I never meant for any of this...”

“Hey, hey, don't say that,” Justin immediately replied, trying to smile at her. “It's not your fault. You're not responsible for your mother's actions.”

“The things she said... She was so hostile...”

“Jenny, we always knew that your mother didn't like us and has her problems with our family. None of that is your fault. You are not responsible for what happened in the past. You were merely a baby... So don't worry, okay?”

“Is Gus okay?” Jenny asked, looking at Justin from concerned eyes. “He seemed so angry.”

Justin took a deep breath before he replied. “No, I don't think that he's okay, but he will be... He will need a bit of time to work through everything that happened today, but he will be fine. Don't worry about him, okay?”

“I don't want him to hate me for bringing her back into his life,” Jenny whispered, before new sobs wracked her body.

Justin took her into his arms and held her close, as Debbie now rubbed her back in a soothing motion. “He doesn't hate you. He never could. Gus knows that you are not responsible for Melanie's actions and he would never blame you for them.”

“Maybe I should have gone back with her. Just to stop her from saying all these mean things...”

“Hey, don't say that. You don't have to go back to her if you don't want to. We'll set up a meeting with our lawyer on Monday and we'll see from there what we can do. You just try not to worry too much, okay? No matter what happened here today, you're still part of this family and we still love you as such.”

Jenny nodded slowly, before she pulled back from Justin's embrace. “I think I want to be on my own for a while. Is that okay?”

“Of course,” Justin and Debbie said at the same time. They watched as Jenny got up after giving both of them a hug.

“We'll be down here if you need us, okay, honey?” Debbie said as she watched after Jenny as she left the room.

“I think I should check on Brian and Gus,” Justin announced, getting up as well.

“Sunshine,” Debbie started, looking at him. “If you want us to leave, just say the word.”

“I just want to make sure that they are okay,” he said, squeezing her shoulder. “You don't have to leave. In fact, I think it would be good for Jenny if you stayed, if you don't mind.”

“Of course not,” Debbie nodded, watching after Justin as he also left the room. She watched as Carl walked over and sat down next to her.

“How can one person cause so much pain and trouble?” she asked, looking at him from sad eyes.

“I don't know,” he replied honestly, pulling her close.

Chapter 13

Once he had made his way upstairs, Justin stopped, wondering if he should check on Gus or Brian first. Knowing that Brian probably wouldn’t be ready to talk to him yet anyway, he decided to check on Gus first and headed straight for his bedroom. Once outside the door, he gently knocked.

“Hey, it’s me,” he said as he opened the door slightly. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah,” was the quiet reply from his son and Justin was glad that he had at least gotten a reply at all. At least Gus was talking which he took as a good sign.

He slowly walked over to Gus’ bed where he found his son lying on top of it, staring at the ceiling with tears in his eyes. He sat down on the edge of the bed and reached out a hand to push a strand of hair out of Gus’ face.

“I won’t ask you if you’re okay,” he started quietly, looking at the young man from sad eyes. “I know you’re not.”

Gus just shrugged but didn’t look away. “I am fine.”

“No, you’re not and it’s okay not to be fine after what just happened,” Justin said quietly.

“What happened? What was that?” Gus asked, slowly sitting up and resting his back against some pillows, so he could look more easily at Justin.

“Hell, if I know,” Justin sighed, running his hand through his hair.

“I knew she didn’t care about me, I mean, how else could she have just left like that, but… to know that she also doesn’t care about Jenny…”

“I know,” Justin agreed, meeting Gus’ gaze. “And I know that she cared about you once… She loved you, Gus. I know that she did at one point, but… she changed.”

Gus rolled his eyes, making it obvious what he thought of Justin’s reply.

“I know it doesn’t seem that way, but she wasn’t always like this,” Justin said quietly. “When I got to know her, she actually loved you. And when she was pregnant with Jenny, she seemed happy enough to be a mother.”

“So what made her change?”

“Life,” Justin shrugged. “Everything that happened with your mother, your Dad and Luke… I mean, she has never been a particularly loving and warm person, but from what I can tell, she shut down completely after that and that’s when she really changed.”

“But it wasn’t Jenny’s fault or even my fault,” Gus exclaimed angrily. “Why would she punish us for what Lindsay did?”

“I am not sure she even realised that that’s what happened,” Justin replied honestly, then took Gus’ hand and squeezed it. “My guess is as good as anyone else’s at this point, Gus. I just know that she used to be a different person to who she seems to be now. I know that there used to be a time when she loved you and Jenny, but… to be honest with you, she was never the most maternal person to begin with. Even then she was focused on her career. She loved you and Jenny, but… she was never the stay at home type of mother that would have been happy raising kids all day long. She wanted the career and I think she just wanted to prove that she could do it all, you know? The career, the family, having children herself…”

Gus seemed to ponder what Justin had said for a couple of minutes, then took a deep breath. “Is that why she hates Dad so much? Because he was able to do it all?”

Justin actually had to chuckle, before he turned more serious. “She already hated your Dad long before you or Jenny were born. From what I know, she hated him pretty much the whole time she was with Lindsay. If you ask me, I think she was jealous of him…”

“Of Dad?”

“He had the career. I mean, nothing like now with Kinnetik, but even back then he was already a very successful ad exec on his way to becoming partner. He had money, was successful, everybody wanted him or wanted to be him. He lived his life without apologies and regrets. He was out, was unapologetic and even despite all that, Lindsay still loved him. In Melanie’s eyes probably even more than she loved her. I think she wanted to be like him, but never had the guts to go for it.”

“Why did she agree to him being my father?” Gus asked, looking at Justin from sad eyes. “If she hated him that much, why didn’t she say no?”

Justin shrugged. “She tried, but Lindsay was insistent that Brian would be the father or no one. She wanted your Dad and no one else and at the time Melanie couldn’t have children herself, so the only way for her to prove to everyone that she could do it all was to accept that it would be your Dad or no one.”

“That’s a pretty shitty reason for agreeing to have someone be the father of your child.”

“And it always caused tension between her and your Dad and Lindsay. I never understood why Lindsay even suggested it, but I guess at the time we didn’t see the truth for what it was.”

“That she was crazy?” Gus frowned, not sure he followed.

“That she was so in love with your father that she was willing to do all these crazy things to bind him to her,” Justin said sadly, his voice low.

“Great, so my mother only wanted to have me so my father would mysteriously fall in love with her even though he is gay and she is a lesbian?”

Justin could hear the agitation in Gus’ voice and sighed. “Gus…”

“That’s it though, isn’t it? That’s the reason she had me…”

“She had you, because she wanted a child and wanted to be a mother.”

“And was hoping that Dad would somehow forget that he was gay and would end up with her? That’s so fucked up…” Gus angrily slammed his fist into one of his pillows.

“I am sorry, Gus. I shouldn’t have said anything,” Justin shook his head as he ran a hand up and down his son’s arm.

“I guess Melanie was right about one thing,” Gus muttered dejectedly as he sank down into his pillows, turned around and buried his head in them. “The truth does hurt.”

Justin watched Gus as he cried into the pillow and leaned over, hugging him as well as he could with Gus’ current position. “Gus, I am sorry… I know it seems that way, but… you know that your Dad and I have always loved you. And even though it doesn’t seem that way, your moms did, too at one point.”

Gus continued crying for several minutes and Justin tried to console him as well as he could. When Gus calmed down a bit, Justin gently turned him around so that he was lying on his back and looking at Justin.

“Honey, I know it hurts now, but you have a big family that loves you. So many people that love you for the great person that you are. Don’t let her win by taking that away from you. Your mothers might not have been the mothers they should have been to you but you were always loved by your Dad and me.”

Gus nodded, looking at Justin from wet eyes. “I know,” he said quietly, before he leaned over and hugged his father. “And you’re nothing like her, no matter what she says.”

Justin hugged Gus back and held him tight. They stayed locked in their embrace for the longest time before Justin pulled back and looked at Gus sadly. “Maybe not, but that doesn’t mean that I was always the father you deserved or needed.”

“I know that wasn’t your fault,” Gus whispered, knowing that Justin was referring to the years when he hadn’t been in his life. Years that he knew Justin had been out of his life because of his mother’s and father’s actions, not because of his own will. “You were always there when you could and you always loved me, no matter what.”

“I still do,” Justin said, his voice full of emotion. “I love you, Gus. And it breaks my heart to know that you’re hurting right now. If I could, I would make her pay for that.”

“And leave nothing for Dad?” Gus joked and he was glad when Justin actually chuckled in reaction. “We will make her pay by helping Jenny to stay away from her, won’t we?”

“Yes, we will. We will meet with the lawyer on Monday and will see what we can do about Jenny’s custody,” Justin agreed, nodding emphatically.

“Good,” Gus nodded as well, before he sat up in a more comfortable position. “I don’t want her to go back to that woman.”

“No one wants that, Gus,” Justin said, adjusting his position as well, so he was sitting more comfortably. “Your Dad and I will do whatever we can to make sure she can stay here with her family.”

“How is she?” Gus suddenly asked, his eyes widening as if he had just remembered her. “Shit, she must have been so upset and I just ran off and left her alone.”

“Don’t worry, Grandma Debs stayed with her. She is upset, but I think she will be fine… More than anything she seemed sorry that she had brought Melanie back into our lives and she was scared that you would now hate her for bringing her back into your life.”

“What? No,” Gus immediately exclaimed. “I could never hate her. It’s not her fault that Melanie is such a bitch.”

“I know, which is what I told her as well. I am sure she would also love to hear it from you though,” Justin said gently, looking at his son. “She went to her room and wanted to be alone for a bit.”

“Do you think she will want to speak to me?” Gus frowned, not quite sure if he should leave her alone or go to her and talk to her.

“I don’t know, but why don’t you go and check? If she doesn’t, I am sure she will let you know and you can talk later. Maybe talking to you will be just what she needs though.”

“And you, are you okay?” Gus now asked, looking at his father in concern. “I know that she said some things…”

“I am fine, Gus. Don’t worry about me. Nothing she says matters to me. What matters to me are you, your siblings, your Dad. As long as I know that my family is okay and loves me and that I love them, I don’t care what she thinks about me.”

“I love you,” Gus said sincerely, resting his head on Justin’s shoulder. “And I know that you love me and always have…As has Dad.”

“Then that’s all that matters to me,” Justin whispered, holding Gus close.

They stayed like that for a couple of minutes, before Gus headed for Jenny’s room and Justin headed for the master bedroom, knowing that that’s where he would find Brian.

This time he didn’t knock and just entered the room. He frowned when he saw that the bed was empty, having expected to find Brian there.

When he looked around the room, he found his husband standing at the window, hugging himself as he looked outside.

“Hey… Are you okay?” He asked quietly as he made his way over and wrapped his arms around Brian’s waist, resting his head against the strong back of the man he loved more than anything.

“I was so close to hitting her,” Brian said, his voice hardly above a whisper. “She made me that fucking angry.”

“I know,” Justin murmured, rubbing his hands over Brian’s chest gently. He couldn’t help but smile when he felt one of Brian’s hands reach for his own. “She made me fucking furious as well.”

“I’ve never hit a woman, but I would have hit her,” Brian went on as if Justin hadn’t spoken. “And I wouldn’t have felt bad about it.”

“Brian,” Justin said, tightening his embrace around his husband’s torso. “Don’t let her get to you… She has no power over you, over us…”

“The way she talked to Gus… How dare she? And what she said about you…”

Justin could hear the anger in Brian’s voice and while he felt angry himself, he knew that it was nothing compared to how Brian felt. Because on top of everything else, Justin knew without a doubt that Brian wasn’t only angry with her but also with himself.

“It’s nothing she didn’t say to me before when I went to see her last week,” Justin sighed, slowly loosening his embrace and moving around Brian’s tense body, so he could look at him as he spoke. “I don’t care what she thinks about me or us. She doesn’t know shit…”

After a couple of seconds Brian’s eyes went down and his gaze met Justin’s. “How are you not more upset about this?”

“I am upset,” Justin said, taking Brian’s hand and leading him over to their bed where he sat down with him. “The way she spoke to Gus… The way she acted like she is so superior to all of us when we all know how she left him…It made me angry as hell, but… most of all it made me sad because I knew… because I could see how much her words were hurting you and Gus…”

When Brian didn’t reply and just hung his head, Justin pulled him closer and made him rest his head on his shoulder.

“Don’t beat yourself up about what she said… Please… We know the truth. You know the truth. You are a great father and Gus, Luke, Vicky and I love you more than anything in this world. She knows nothing about our family, she doesn’t know what we went through, what we made it through to get here… She has no idea which is why her words have no impact. Don’t give them more power than they have.”

“Easier said than done,” Brian whispered, his voice sad, but still full of anger. “I can’t help it.”

“Because you’re a good man… I bet she doesn’t even remember half of what was said to her and cares even less about our opinions, but here you are, listening to her hurtful words and thinking about whether or not they might be true.”

“You are unbelievable, do you know that?” Brian sounded amused despite the seriousness of their conversation and pulled back to look at Justin from shining eyes.

“Isn’t that usually my line?” Justin chuckled as well, looking right into Brian’s hazel eyes, his own dancing with mischief. He gently pushed Brian down onto the bed and rested his head on his husband’s chest, cuddling into him, happy when Brian’s arms went around him and held him tight.

Justin was glad that Brian himself had lifted the heavy mood a bit with his comment and he was only too happy to go along with it. Over the years they had talked about what had happened with Luke and the circumstances surrounding his birth and the years after and while they had never been easy conversations and while Justin knew that Brian still carried around an immense weight of guilt for what he had done back then, with time it had become easier for them to talk about it. They had both learned to deal with their past and to accept it as part of who they were as a couple as well as individually. It had taken hard work and lots of patience, but they had learned to accept the past as a part of their history and had learned to deal with it when it reared its ugly head which it didn’t as often anymore as it used to in the beginning of their new relationship. By now they would sometimes go months, even years without talking about what had happened and when it became a topic between them for whatever reason, they knew how to deal with it and had learned to talk about it.

And just to see Brian trying to lift the mood while they were talking about this topic showed Justin more than anything how far they had come as a family and the two of them as a couple.

“Only you would still go and call me a good man after what I did,” Brian said seriously, tightening his grip around Justin’s body.

Justin gently ran his hands over Brian’s torso as he spoke. “Because I know you. The real you. I know that you’re trying to hide it very well at times, but deep down you are a good man, Brian Kinney-Taylor. And I wouldn’t have married you if you weren’t.”

“Lucky me,” Brian whispered, placing a gentle kiss on the blond mop of hair he loved so much.

“And don’t you forget it,” Justin gave right back, raising his head so he could meet Brian’s gaze. “Don’t let what she said get to you. She doesn’t know shit about us, about you… She can only dream of ever being half as good a parent as you are.”

Before Brian could reply to what Justin had said, they heard a knock on the door.

“Dad? Papa? Are you decent?” They heard the voice of Luke who had apparently been the one to knock.

Justin rolled his eyes as he slowly lifted himself up. “Yes, of course we are.”

Brian sat up as well, frowning at Justin as Luke slowly entered the room. “To be fair, it was probably smart to ask first.”

Justin shook his head, then focused on their son who was looking at them curiously.

“You are back early,” he said, noticing that there was still light outside.

“It started raining, so…,” Luke shrugged, leaning against the doorframe. “What happened here? Grandma Deb and Grandpa Carl are downstairs, looking serious as hell… And no one else is around. Where is everyone? When I asked Grandma, she said I should go looking for you.”

Justin sighed, then looked at Brian who just nodded slightly. They were both in agreement that Luke had a right to know what had happened and also needed to know.

“Jenny’s mother has been here this afternoon,” Justin said, looking at Luke’s concerned face. “And it didn’t go well.”

“Where is Jenny? She didn’t have to go back with her, did she?” Luke immediately rushed out, looking from his Dad to his Papa and back.

“No, she’s still here,” Brian immediately calmed his son’s worries. “Everyone has just been really upset after that visit… Melanie… she said some things… I think everyone just needed a bit of a break to calm down once she left.”

Luke nodded, still looking concerned. “And Jenny? And Gus? Are they okay?”

Brian looked to Justin, realising that he didn’t really have an answer. When Justin replied, he listened intently as well.

“Not really, but they will be… They were both really upset, but with some time and love and support, I know they will be okay,” Justin said, answering both Luke’s as well as Brian’s concern.

“Where are they?” Luke asked next, ready to go looking for them right away.

“Gus was in his room, but he wanted to go and check in on Jenny. She was particularly upset and worried…And she said she needed some time alone to work through what has happened earlier.”

“Is she in her room?”

Justin nodded. “That’s where she went, yeah.”

“Do you think she would like me to talk to her? Try and comfort her?” Luke asked, now suddenly sounding very unsure and much younger than his 15 years.

Justin smiled gently at his son. “I am sure she could do with some comfort from a friendly face, but don’t pressure her… if she doesn’t want to talk, leave her be.”

“Okay,” Luke nodded, looking at both his fathers. “Are you okay?” He asked next, once again looking from one to the other. “I know you don’t like her mother much either.”

“That’s the understatement of the year,” Brian muttered darkly, before taking a deep breath. He rested his hand on Justin’s thigh and gave it a squeeze. “We’re fine. Don’t worry about us.”

Luke nodded, seeing that his fathers looked exhausted and slightly downcast, but mostly okay. “I’ll go check on Jenny and Gus.”

Both Brian and Justin nodded and watched after Luke as he left their bedroom, closing the door behind him.

“He’s a good boy,” Brian said at the same time Justin said “We need to tell him and Gus.”

They eyed each other for the longest time before Brian sighed. He knew what Justin was talking about, he knew that Justin meant telling them the truth about what had happened all those years ago and more than that he knew that Justin was right.

They had always said that they would be honest and wouldn’t keep what had happened a secret from their children. They had always said that they would tell them the truth once they were old enough and while Gus had probably already figured out most of the truth for himself, both from his memory of already being ten years old when Justin had returned from New York as well as from picking up bits and pieces of conversation around him, they weren’t so sure about Luke. Luke had only been five years when Justin had returned from New York and had never really asked many questions about the time Justin hadn’t been in his life. Maybe it was because he had still been so young or maybe because he wasn’t ready yet to ask those questions, but fact was that neither Gus nor Luke had ever asked about that time. They just seemed to have accepted that Justin had been gone for a while and had then come back and become a part of their family. And ever since they had been happy as a family.

“Sunshine,” Brian started, but was stopped by Justin right away who looked at him seriously.

“You heard what she said today. You heard what she told Gus about me not being in his life. However this might end, she will cause more trouble and she will tell more lies or the truth as she sees it. I don’t want them to hear those lies from her and maybe start believing them because we didn’t tell them the truth. They should hear it from us, Brian,” Justin said, his voice full of determination.

“You’re right,” Brian said quietly, plopping back down onto the bed, covering his face with his arm. “I know that you are. That doesn’t make it any easier though…”

“I know,” Justin said, leaning back as well and looking at Brian’s face with concern in his eyes. “If it were up to me, I’d say why stir up the hornet’s nest, but I don’t trust her, Brian. And I don’t want her to hurt you and them any more than she already did.”

Brian moved his arm away and looked up at Justin from sad yet determined eyes. “So instead we do it ourselves.”

“Brian,” Justin sighed, leaning down to rest his chin on Brian’s chest. “It will be fine.”

“You don’t know that, Sunshine. Just because you forgave me doesn’t mean they will as well.”

“No, I don’t know that, but I know them and I know how much they love you and that they know what a good father you have been to them all these years. Yes, they will be hurt and yes, it might cause tension, but in the long run, I’d rather have them hear the truth from us than from her. I am sure that with time they will understand it. And… maybe it won’t even matter. I am pretty sure Gus has figured most of what has happened out by now and he never said anything or got angry with you. He loves you because he knows that you’ve always been there for him,” Justin said quietly.

He could understand why Brian would be afraid of that particular conversation. Admitting your biggest regret in life in front of your children, admitting you weren’t the hero they considered you to be and that you weren’t the person they thought you were and were looking up to wasn’t easy by any means and he could understand why Brian was so worried. He was as well.

“It’s not Gus I am worried about,” Brian muttered, before he shook his head. “But I know that you’re right and that we should control the conversation instead of letting her control it.”

“Luke will be fine. It might take some time, but at the end of the day, you have always been a great father to him and he knows that you love him more than anything. Yes, he will be hurt and maybe even angry, but… I know that we’ll be fine. We’ve made it through worse.” Justin then leaned up and gave Brian a gentle kiss. “I love you, Brian.”

“I love you and your big heart and your neverending optimism,” Brian whispered as he kissed Justin back.

“My big heart isn’t the only big thing you love about me,” Justin then joked, his eyes dancing with mischief.

He was relieved when Brian actually went for his poor attempt to lighten the mood and a couple of minutes later the dreaded conversation was off their minds if only for a few minutes. Minutes which they spent exploring that other big thing that Brian loved so much about Justin – his big cock.

Chapter 14

When Brian and Justin returned to the living-room an hour later, Debbie and Carl had wisely not commented on their change of clothes or the fact that they had apparently taken a shower.

Instead they focused on the problem at hand which was Melanie and the kind of trouble she would most likely cause for them.

Everyone agreed that it would probably be for the best that Jenny moved to Debbie and Carl's house for the time being, but everyone also agreed that she should have the last word on that. If she didn't feel comfortable with that, she would stay with Brian and Justin.

Brian and Justin also made it clear that they would pay for the lawyer to take on Jenny's case, even though Debbie and Carl protested and insisted that they should pay for it as Jenny was their granddaughter. In the end they gave in though, knowing that Brian and Justin could afford paying for the lawyer and would be able to afford a much better lawyer than they could.

Once it was time for dinner, Justin and Debbie prepared some of the leftovers they still had from Thanksgiving and Brian went to get the kids while they were busy getting dinner ready. By now Jennifer and Vicky had also come back and Jennifer would join them for dinner as well.

Brian was sure that Justin and Debbie would fill her in on everything that had happened that day while he was gone to get the kids.

When he made it to Jenny's door – funny how he already considered the guestroom Jenny's room even though she had only been staying with them for a couple of days - he could hear quiet conversation coming from behind the door. He couldn't make out any words and didn't mean to eavesdrop on the kids anyway, so he announced his presence by knocking on the door.

“Dinner will be ready in a few minutes,” he said and was surprised when the door opened and he saw Gus standing right in front of him just a few seconds later.

“Thanks, Dad. We'll be down in a bit,” his son said, seeming okay in light of what had happened earlier that day.

“Vicky and your Grandma Jen are also back,” Brian added, before he made to turn around and go back downstairs.

“Dad?” Gus asked, looking at his father from worried eyes. “Is everything okay?”

Brian shrugged, deciding that honesty would be the best approach in this case. “We don't know. We'll see. We'll have a meeting with the lawyer on Monday and we'll know more then,” he said as he looked over to Jenny and Luke as well who were sitting on the bed.

“I am so sorry,” Jenny started, but stopped when Luke put a hand on her arm.

“There's nothing to be sorry for,” he said and Brian could only agree with his son.

“He's right, Jenny. You have nothing to be sorry for. It's not your fault that your mother is such a ...,” he was about to call her a name, but then caught himself just in time. “Is such an unpleasant person.”

Gus shook his head in amusement. “Nice save, Dad.”

Brian smirked, then looked from one kid to the next. “Are you guys okay?”

When all three kids nodded, Brian nodded as well. “Good, but if you're not... You know you can talk to us. All of you,” he emphasized as he looked at Jenny.

“Thanks, Dad, but I think we've got it covered,” Gus replied, looking over to his brother and Jenny who both nodded as well.

“Alright,” Brian said, this time starting to move away. “We better not keep your father and Debbie waiting. Dinner should be ready by now.”

All three children followed him downstairs and in the end dinner turned out to be a surprisingly fun affair. Vicky regaled them with tales of her day with Grandma Jen and Jennifer contributed quite a few funny anecdotes herself which made everyone around the table laugh and made all memories of Melanie and her earlier visit disappear if only for a while.

After dinner Brian and Justin spent some time with Vicky and got her ready for bedtime while Debbie and Carl had offered to talk to Jenny about their idea that Jenny should move in with them for the time being.

Everyone was surprised by how quickly Jenny actually agreed to the idea, having expected more of a fight from the girl, but Jenny said that she had actually thought about it herself, wondering if it wouldn't be better for everyone if she moved out of Britin.

When Jennifer who had joined the conversation heard the young girl's tone of voice, she took it upon herself to assure Jenny that she would be more than welcome to stay at Britin, no matter the circumstances. Both Gus and Luke immediately agreed with their grandmother and told Jenny that they wanted her to stay.

Once Vicky was in bed and Brian and Justin returned to join the rest of the family, they also explained that Jenny was more than welcome to stay, but that it would be her decision and that even if she decided to move in with Debbie and Carl for the time being, she would always be more than welcome to stay with them or visit them.

After talking all their options over, Jenny agreed in the end that she would stay at Britin for another day and would move to her grandparents once Gus returned to New York for university.

Which had opened up a whole other can of worms because with everything going on it had been clear that Gus had seemingly all but forgotten that he was due to return to New York the next day. He argued that he could miss a week of classes and should stay to hear what the lawyer would say on Monday, but both Brian and Justin immediately shut that idea down.

They promised to keep Gus in the loop and would also pay for him to come back to Pittsburgh the next weekend, but he would not miss classes. His education was too important. Much to Gus' dismay the grandmothers agreed with his fathers and he quickly realised that he wouldn't win that argument.

In the end Gus, Luke and Jenny excused themselves, saying that they wanted to spend their last evening together and went upstairs.

The adults talked for a while longer before everyone left.

On Sunday afternoon the Kinney-Taylors headed into Pittsburgh for family dinner at Debbie's house. Even though the whole family had only gotten together a couple of days before on Thanksgiving, it was a nice affair and everyone enjoyed spending time together.

After dinner it was time for Gus to say goodbye to everyone and Brian took him to the airport. On the way and in the terminal, Brian had to promise several times that they would keep Gus updated on what the lawyer would say and that Brian would send him a ticket for a flight to Pittsburgh for the next weekend.

With Jenny staying at Debbie and Carl's house and Gus back in New York, Sunday evening meant a return to normality for the Kinney-Taylor family when they returned to Britin. Both Luke and Vicky were sad that Gus and Jenny were no longer with them at Britin, but Brian and Justin knew that they would be fine.

Once Luke and Vicky had been dropped off at school on Monday, Justin joined Brian on his ride into Pittsburgh. They still had some time before the meeting with the lawyer and Justin decided to join Brian at Kinnetik. It had been quite some time since he had last been to the offices and he was actually looking forward to seeing Cynthia again and catching up with her.

After lunch they headed off to the appointment with their lawyer, meeting Debbie, Carl and Jenny at the office. They shouldn't have been as surprised as they were when Jennifer also showed up to the meeting, claiming that this involved her grandchildren, so of course she wanted to know what would happen.

The meeting itself went rather well, though it had some surprises.

The lawyer listened to all the information they gave him and told them that he thought that they had a good case against Melanie. Just the fact that Jenny was already 17 and her opinion would count as well as the fact that Melanie hadn't even noticed her daughter's absence for several days would help them with their case. Also the fact that Melanie had needed another three days to make her way to Pittsburgh to see her daughter after claiming how worried she was about leaving her in Brian's and Justin's care would only help their case. She couldn't have been that worried if she waited three days and didn't call once to see how Jenny was.

A surprise had been when the lawyer had advised against filing for custody and against filing for an emergency hearing or court order.

He had advised them that it would be better to let Melanie make the first move to see how she would argue her case. Yes, he could understand their desire to get custody for Jenny, but if they would make the first move, it could be that they were stirring up a hornet's nest so to speak.

After leaving on Saturday, Melanie hadn't been in contact again. She hadn't contacted the police or hadn't contacted authorities concerning Jenny's well-being which their lawyer assured them would only work in their favour. The longer Melanie waited to do anything, the harder it would be for her to prove that she had indeed been worried about her daughter's well-being.

While that reasoning made sense to everyone, it was obvious that they would have liked a more definite decision from a judge instead of following their lawyer's 'wait and see' approach.

He assured them that Melanie making the first move would be the best that could happen to them as it would reveal her strategy and would give them several options to react to that strategy, while filing for custody themselves would do the exact opposite and would give Melanie the advantage by revealing their strategy. And the longer she waited to do anything, the weaker her case would look and the more chances they would have of getting a positive decision from a judge concerning Jenny's custody.

In the end everyone agreed that the lawyer probably knew best and that following his advice was the best they could do for now.

Brian and Justin returned to Kinnetik and called Gus to update him on what the lawyer had said. They also sent him the information for the flight they had booked for him for Friday, getting him to Pittsburgh right after his last class ended.

“When are we going to talk to them?” Brian asked, looking up at Justin who was leaning against his desk, looking at some of the artwork that had been brought to Brian's office for a new campaign he was working on.

“What?” He muttered, obviously deeply concentrated on the artwork and not knowing what Brian was talking about.

“Gus and Luke. When are we going to talk to them?” Brian said, taking the artwork from Justin and putting it onto his desk, before he pulled the younger man over to sit down in his lap.

“I think we should give Gus some time to see Jenny first before we have that talk... I don't know, maybe Saturday afternoon? We could ask Debbie to watch Vicky, so she wouldn't be at the house. That way Gus could take her in the morning, spend some time with both Vicky and Jenny and then we could talk to them without interruptions.”

“You have already thought about this, haven't you?” Brian said, looking at Justin closely.

“A bit. I don't think it would be wise to have Vicky at the house. She's too young and she doesn't need to know...”

“I agree, but...,” Brian sighed, hanging his head and resting it on Justin's shoulder, “she will find out sooner or later that something is going on.”

“Yes, something, but she doesn't need to know all the details. And in any case, she's only five. She wouldn't understand.”

Brian nodded, albeit reluctantly. “And she loves spending time with Jenny, so that would be good now that Jenny isn't staying with us anymore.”

“Yeah,” Justin agreed. “Knowing Debbie, she'll probably be busy making Christmas cookies or something, so I am sure she wouldn't mind having Vicky around.”

“Sounds like a plan, Sunshine,” Brian said, running his hand over Justin's arm. “Have you also thought about how we should tell them? What we should tell them?”

Justin nestled into Brian's embrace. “The truth.”

“Yeah, I know, but I mean... it's complicated to put it mildly... how far back do you want to go?”

Justin shrugged. “I don't know. As far as we have to to fully explain to them what happened.”

“And I guess you expect me to do the talking?” Brian raised an eyebrow as he raised his head to meet Justin's gaze.

“No, WE will tell them,” Justin said quietly, turning around a bit, so he could better face Brian. “This is OUR history and WE will tell them. Not you, not me. WE. We will do it together.”

Brian nodded, but didn't say anything else. Justin could see how thoughtful he looked and ran a hand down his cheek tenderly.

“We will do it together and I will be there right by your side. Whatever happens, we'll face it together. You and me.”

Brian nodded once more, leaning into Justin's touch. “You are amazing.”

“I think you mentioned it before,” Justin said, tenderly running his hand through Brian's hair, before he leaned in for a short kiss. “I love you and whatever will happen, we'll deal with it together. As we've done before.”

The rest of the week was quiet. Luke and Vicky went to school and their normal after school activities, Brian worked on the new campaign and Justin worked on a new painting for his next show.

They didn't hear from Melanie all week which confused them, but at the same time no one really minded that there had been nothing from her. As the lawyer had said, the longer she stayed quiet, the better it would be for their case, so everyone just enjoyed the quiet before the storm for as long as they could.

Jenny met with Luke and Vicky twice during the week, once visiting them at Britin and once being visited by them at Debbie's house. She and Debbie and Carl had settled into a rhythm and had gotten used to living in the same house.

Carl had insisted that Jenny stay up to date on her school work and had gotten in contact with her school. It had been a bit hard to explain the current situation and the school had been a bit wary to hear that Jenny wasn't staying with a parent or legal guardian, but in the end they agreed to Carl's request to send her homework assignments to her in an email at the end of the day so she could stay on top of her homework.

Everyone knew that they would need to come up with a better arrangement soon, most likely they would have to enrol Jenny in a school in Pittsburgh while she was staying with them, but for the moment it was the best they could do.

Justin noticed that Brian seemed to be more withdrawn the closer they got to the weekend and couldn't really blame him. He knew that Brian was worried about the outcome of their conversation with Gus and Luke and quite honestly, so was he. They didn't know how their sons would react to finding out the whole truth about why Justin hadn't been a part of the family for the first five years of Luke's life and while he hoped that their reaction would be understanding they couldn't be sure.

He could very well remember how angry he had been when he had found out and he wouldn't blame either Gus or Luke if they reacted with anger as well. He knew that it would hurt Brian and yes, it would also hurt him, but at the same time there was nothing they could do about that. The boys had a right to know the truth and it was important that they heard it from their fathers.

Justin noticed how Brian seemed almost eager to spend time with Luke, as if he was expecting the worst and trying to spend as much time with his son while he still could. It wasn't like Brian didn't spend time with Luke under normal circumstances, quite on the contrary, they would spend a lot of one on one time together, playing soccer, Brian helping Luke with school projects, etc. Brian had always been a very involved father like that, as was Justin himself, but this week Justin noticed that Brian seemed to try to spend even more time with Luke.

When they talked, Brian said that he was fine, but Justin knew that he wasn't. He tried to be there and be as supportive as he could be, but he knew that until the conversation had finally taken place and was out of the way, there wasn't much he could do to cheer up his husband.

He was there whenever Brian needed him, offered his support and love, but at the end of the day he knew that nothing would help Brian but getting the conversation over and done with.

So Justin was especially glad when Friday arrived and Gus flew in.

At least the dreaded conversation would be out of the way the next day and then they could deal with the aftermath – whatever that might look like.

Chapter 15

Brian and Justin sat down on the sofa and looked at Gus and Luke who were sitting on the other sofa, looking back at them in confusion.

“What's with the serious faces?” Gus asked as he looked from Brian to Justin and back.

“Yeah, what's going on? What do you want to talk to us about?” Luke asked, seemingly just as confused as his older brother.

Brian and Justin had asked the boys the previous night to keep their afternoons clear as there was something they needed to talk about and now the time for that conversation had come.

“Your Dad and I asked you to stay home today because there is something we need to tell you. Something you might already know, something you might have already figured out yourself or something you might have wondered about but never asked us about,” Justin started, looking at his sons from serious eyes.

“Is this THE talk? I thought we already covered that when you made me practise putting the condom on the cucumber,” Luke muttered, shuddering as he thought back to that particular day when his dads had sat him down and explained all about safe sex to him. Gay and/or straight, they weren't judging, but just wanted him to be protected.

“Then why am I here? Been there, done that,” Gus threw in, looking from Luke to his fathers. “You seem awfully serious. Is everything okay?”

“It's not THAT talk,” Brian said quietly, avoiding meeting either boys' eyes. “But it could turn out to be equally unpleasant.” He was glad when he felt Justin's hand on his leg, the physical connection immediately calming him down a bit.

“Are you sick again?” Luke blurted out, his eyes immediately showing the worry he felt.

“No, I am not sick. I am fine. It's nothing like that,” Brian immediately calmed Luke's worries, meeting his concerned gaze. “Really, I am fine.”

“Then what is this about? You're worrying me,” Gus admitted as he looked at his fathers.

“It's actually about something that happened in our past. All our pasts,” Justin said, trying to find the right words to explain what he knew would probably change the dynamics in their family for some time to come, if not forever. “It's something we want to explain to you in our own words. Last week, when Jenny's mother came here, she made some accusations and insinuations refering to all our pasts and your Dad and I want you to know the truth from us. We both think that she will try to cause more trouble for us and will probably think that she can hurt us by throwing around these accusations and we don't want either of you to be unprepared for that. We want you to know the truth from us so you can make up your own mind and decide how you want to react.”

“This is about what she said to you, about you abandoning me just like she did and not being any better than her, isn't it?” Gus asked, looking at his father from troubled eyes.

“It's part of that, yes,” Justin admitted, “but there's more. A lot more.”

“I told you that I don't believe her lies. I know that it wasn't your fault and I don't blame you for it,” Gus immediately interjected.

Justin smiled at Gus, smiled at the love he heard in his son's words. “And I am grateful for that, Gus, but there is more. A lot more. Not just concerning you, but also concerning Luke.” Justin's eyes now wandered to his younger son, who looked at him from widened eyes.

After a couple of seconds Luke spoke. “Is this about when you were in New York?”

“Yes,” Justin nodded, holding Luke's gaze as he spoke. “I know that you've never asked us about those years, but you need to know the truth about why I wasn't around. You deserve to know it and you need to know it in order to deal with whatever she might throw our way.”

It was once again Gus who interrupted, now looking at his Dad. “That's what she was talking about when she said you had cost your son years with his father... She wasn't talking about me; she was talking about Luke...”

Meeting Gus' gaze head on, Brian nodded. “Yes, she meant Luke.”

Gus looked like something was finally falling into place, looking from Brian to Justin and back.

“That's the bad thing you said you had done when he came back from New York...That's why Papa was so angry with you back then,” Gus muttered, finally putting together the pieces that had always been right there in front of him.

“Gus,” Justin said, seeing how his son's brain was finally putting together what had happened all those years ago.

“Yes,” Brian whispered, “It was because of me.”

“What was because of you? What... I don't understand,” Luke said, looking at everyone in the room with him, not sure he could follow the conversation that seemed to be going on between his parents and his older brother. “What are you talking about?”

Gus was about to reply to his brother, but Justin beat him to it. “We want to explain this to you. To both of you. But please...I know this is an emotional matter and what you will hear might be painful and might make you angry, but... can we please try to stay calm? And can you please let us explain? Your Dad and I want to explain, but we want to explain it all to you. You need to let us finish, so you will have all the facts, not just part of the truth.”

Hearing the plea in Justin's voice, both boys nodded in the end.

“Thanks,” Justin nodded as well, before he took Brian's hand and gave it a supporting squeeze. He was glad when Brian squeezed back. Whatever would happen next, they would face it together. Just as Justin was about to start talking, he was surprised to hear Brian's voice. He had expected that he would have to be the one to tell their sons the truth, knowing how affected Brian still was by what had happened all those years ago, but Brian's voice was calm and steady as he started speaking.

“To understand all of it, we need to go back a bit. We need to explain a bit about our past, so you have a better understanding of everything that happened,” he started, before he took a deep breath. “Gus, you might still remember some things, but you were only a small boy back then and still living with your mothers, so I doubt that even you know all the details.” He looked at his son from sad eyes, before he continued speaking.

“Your father and I weren't always together like we are now. We were in a relationship, but it was a very different relationship to the one we have now. Which was mostly due to me. I was a very different person back then.”

Brian stopped for a second, looking at Justin from rueful eyes. Justin nodded in encouragement and gave his hand a squeeze which gave Brian the strength to go on.

“Back then I didn't believe in love. I didn't believe in relationships and I didn't believe that homosexuals should have families and should become imitations of heterosexuals. I believed in sex, not love and what we had back then could at best be described as an open relationship.”

At that point Gus interrupted his father. “But you were supposed to get married. I remember that I was supposed to be the ring bearer.”

“Yes, and neither of us would have been ready for that,” Brian said, shaking his head sadly. “Back then I wanted to marry your father because I thought it would make him happy and because I was scared of losing him... there had been a bomb and I thought he might have died and when I found out he hadn't... I was scared to lose him and thought that marrying him would make sure he wouldn't disappear from my life. But before that bomb... we had been broken up for months. Your father broke up with me because I didn't want to commit to him... because I didn't want to give him the family he wanted. So we basically went from broken up to engaged in two days.”

“Is that why you never got married back then?” Luke asked, looking at both his fathers.

“The truth is neither of us was ready for it. Back then we gave ourselves different reasons, justifying why it was the right decision not to get married after all, blaming it on my career and your Dad's views on commitment, but the reality is that it would have only ended badly. Neither of us was ready. Your Dad wasn't ready for a commitment like that and I wasn't ready because I would have married him for the wrong reasons. Yes, I loved your father even back then, but I would have married him to secure my place in his life and that would have never worked. I hadn't even finished my education back then, I hadn't really started my career... we were both different people back then and at very different places in our lives,” Justin replied, trying to explain how different both of them had been back then.

“But you still came to Canada to visit me. Together, I mean. Even after the wedding was cancelled,” Gus said then.

“Yes, we did. For a time we tried to make it work. Your father had moved to New York to work on his career as an artist and we had agreed to try and keep a relationship going with him in New York and me in Pittsburgh. We tried to make it work and I guess it did for a time,” Brian went on, getting ready for what he knew would be the hard part. “Until I found out that I was pregnant... with you,” he added as he met Luke's confused gaze.

Luke's face showed his confusion and it was clear that he couldn't quite follow. “Why did that change anything?”

“It shouldn't have,” Brian sighed, taking a deep breath before he continued. “But it did. It changed everything.”

“I don't understand,” Luke admitted, looking from Brian to Justin and back.

Brian then went on to explain in a halting voice how his pregnancy had changed everything. How he had gotten it into his head that Justin would feel caught in a family and would be too young to settle down for a family life like that and how it could only end badly. How he made the decision not to tell Justin about the pregnancy, so he could work on the career he deserved. How he broke off all contact with Justin and disappeared when he knew that Justin had come looking for him, all in an effort to keep his pregnancy a secret from the one man who should have known from the beginning. How he got the other family members to agree to keep his secret for him and how in the end Justin accepted that they were over and stayed in New York.

He explained everything, explained about his pregnancy, about his problems with Michael and also explained about Lindsay's lie to Justin, how she had told him that his continued visits with Gus in Canada were causing tension with Brian, seeing how he and Justin were over and how it would be better for everyone if he stopped seeing Gus, after all he wasn't really a parent anyway and merely his father's ex-boyfriend. How he had thought that Justin had moved on and that that had been the reason for his visits with Gus stopping, how life had gone on like that for months and months. He explained about all the problems Michael and Lindsay had caused for him by reporting him to child protection services and how it had all escalated to the point where Lindsay had tried to take Luke with Michael's help. He explained about the trial and how Melanie had claimed that his rights to visitation with Gus were void once Lindsay had been sentenced and put away in prison. How she had refused to follow their custody agreement and had stopped him from seeing Gus. How he had gotten himself a lawyer and had fought for his visitation and had in the end been awarded sole custody of Gus. How Gus had come to live with him and Luke at Britin, how he had tried to stay in contact with Melanie so she could visit Gus and how Melanie had just disappeared with Jenny, leaving Toronto without another word to anyone in their family. How he had told Luke about his father and him being in New York but had never been honest with him about the reason why Justin was in New York. How he had told Luke that it was to work on his career when in reality Justin had never known about Luke's existence to begin with.

Brian told them everything and didn't hold back until he got to the point when Justin came back from New York.

When Brian was done talking, dead silence settled over the living-room. No one said anything. Gus and Luke were clearly still trying to wrap their heads around all they had just been told and Brian and Justin hung on to their own memories of that painful time.

The silence lasted for several minutes, before Justin broke it. “Gus... Luke... Say something. Please!” He looked at both his sons and could see a myriad of emotions on their faces.

The silence lasted for several more minutes, before Luke broke it. And when he did, both his fathers couldn't have been more surprised. They had both expected Luke to be angry, had known that he would be, but they had expected him to be angry with Brian and both men seemed surprised when he instead went and attacked Justin.

“How could you... how could you fucking go back to him after what he did?”

“Luke, I...,” Justin started, for a moment too flustered by his son's angry outburst that had been directed at him.

“Is he that good in bed? Good enough to make you forget about what he did to you and me and to just go back to him like nothing had happened?” Luke spat angrily as he got up from the sofa and ran out of the room.

“I hate you! Both of you!” He yelled as he stopped in the doorway for a second before he ran upstairs. He didn't react when Justin called after him to please stay in the room, so they could talk and he also didn't react when he heard his Dad call his name angrily.

“Luke!”

“Brian, please...,” Justin said sternly, trying to get Brian to calm down.

“I will not have him talk to you like that,” Brian just replied, having turned into full protective mode where Justin was concerned.

“He's angry...,” Justin said weakly, holding on to Brian's hand. “Let him be!”

At first it seemed like Brian was ready to fight him on it, in the end he just nodded though. It looked as if all fight was leaving him the moment he nodded and for the moment Justin was glad that Brian wouldn't fight him on this.

“Let me talk to him,” he just said quietly, giving Brian's hand a squeeze. When his husband nodded, Justin sighed in relief. That was at least one fight he wouldn't have to fight that day.

“Gus? Say something,” Justin then urged his older son, looking at where he was still sitting on the sofa, looking beyond dumbfounded by all he had just heard.

“Not now,” Gus just muttered, before he got up as well. “I... I need some time,” he just said before he left the room as well.

“Shit,” Justin muttered, looking after him with worry in his eyes.

“That went well,” Brian muttered dejectedly, running a hand over his face in what could only be described as utter emotional exhaustion. The last two hours, telling their sons about the darkest time in their history as a couple had taken a lot out of him. Justin would have known that even if he hadn't been able to see it so clearly on his face.

“We just need to give them some time to process it all. That was a lot of information to deal with,” he said, looking at Brian in concern. He could feel him shutting down by the second and it scared him. He didn't want Brian to shut him out, not right now. Not when they needed each other. “Are you okay?”

When Brian just looked at Justin as if he was crazy, Justin had to admit to himself how stupid that question had been. Of course he wasn't. Neither was he himself. How could they be, knowing that both their sons were hurting?

“Shit,” Justin just muttered once again as he leaned his head against Brian's shoulder. “I am sorry,” he said quietly after a minute of silence, not looking up from where his head rested. He didn't have to though for Brian to know how guilty he was feeling.

“Why would you be?” Brian asked, wrapping his arms around his husband, hoping to give him some comfort that way.

“If I hadn't insisted that we tell them,” the younger man started only to be interrupted by Brian right away.

“You were right about that. And we both agreed. They needed to know. Both of them...”

“But maybe we should have waited. I mean Melanie hasn't even been in contact at all this week.”

“It would have only delayed the inevitable. It was the right thing to do. They needed to know, Sunshine. You know that,” Brian said quietly, holding Justin tight. “What's this? You don't normally go back on your decisions like that...”

“He said he hated us,” Justin whispered, but then didn't go on.

“And I am sure he's already regretting that he said it. He was angry. You said it yourself,” Brian said, wondering how he had suddenly become the one to comfort Justin when all week Justin had been the strong one and the one who had seemed better prepared for the emotional aftermath of this conversation. “We knew he would be... After hearing something like that...”

Justin sighed deeply, cuddling closer to Brian. “I know, it's just... hearing him say that...it hurts.”

“I know,” Brian whispered, knowing indeed because hearing those words had also cut right into him and had torn out his heart as well. “I know.”

They stayed in each other's arms for a couple of minutes before Brian pulled back and looked at Justin in concern. “Are you okay?”

“I will be,” the younger man said, his voice sounding slightly less emotional.

“I think I should go and check on Luke. See if he's calmed down a bit by now,” Brian said, but was stopped by Justin shaking his head.

“No, let me.”

“Sunshine...,” Brian started, but Justin only shook his head again.

“I know that you think that you deserve his anger and that I don't, but... he has a right to be angry with me as well. You won't be able to stay calm if he says something about me in his anger. We both know it, Brian... Let me talk to him. I can deal with him being angry with me.”

At first it looked like Brian was going to argue, but then he just sighed. “Alright...”

They both knew that Justin was right. Brian's earlier outburst had just shown that. As far as Brian was concerned Justin had been the innocent party in all of this and anyone who dared to say anything else and dared to say anything against him would have to deal with the wrath of Brian. Justin on the other hand knew why Luke was angry and could understand him. The very thing Luke had accused him of earlier had been something he had heard before. Maybe not in the same words, but he knew that Daphne for example had been less than happy about him getting back with Brian after everything had happened. Yes, she had changed her tune by now and supported them, hell, she had even been his best woman when he had married Brian, but back in the day, she had pretty much voiced the same thing Luke had thrown at him earlier. Not in the same words and not for the same reasons, Daphne had mostly been concerned that he would get hurt again by Brian, but at the end of the day it had been the same accusation. How could he go back to Brian after everything he had done? And he knew that Luke had a right to get an answer to that even if Brian might not understand where Luke's anger was coming from or if he thought it was unjustified.

“It will be alright,” Justin said and he wasn't sure if he was saying it more for his own benefit or Brian's at that point.

He then got up and left the room to go looking for his son, knowing that for the moment Brian would be alright.

***

“Luke, can I come in?” Justin asked after he had knocked and opened the door slightly.

“Go away!” His son angrily threw back, giving him an answer to his question.

“I just want to make sure that you're okay,” he went on quietly as he entered the room, surprised when he saw Luke packing his sports bag, angrily throwing clothes into it. And not his soccer clothes. Normal, everyday clothes. “What are you doing?”

“What does it look like? I am packing!” His son angrily gave back as he grabbed a pair of jeans and stuffed them into the bag.

“Why?” Was all Justin could ask, not quite sure he wanted to know the answer.

“Why? You're asking me why?” Luke turned away from his bag and angrily glared at his father. “You're not expecting me to stay here with you and Dad... I told you, I hate you! I fucking hate you!”

“I know that you're angry,” Justin started, but didn't get any further.

“Angry? I passed angry about an hour and a half ago,” Luke yelled, turning back to his sports bag.

“Can we please talk about this?” Justin asked, looking at Luke pleadingly.

“What is there to talk about? Dad is an asshole and you're a spineless prick.”

“I get that you're angry, but things are a bit more complicated than that,” Justin said calmly, trying not to be too affected by the insults Luke had just thrown at him and Brian.

“Really? Looks pretty simple to me: Dad lied about me to you, you found out the truth and basically decided that it didn't matter that he had lied for years and kept us apart and ran right back into his arms.”

“That is not what happened, Luke,” Justin said quietly. He could understand that Luke was angry, but things weren't quite as simple as that.  “Your Dad and I needed a long time before we could move on from what had happened. It took me a long time to forgive him.”

“But you did! You even married him! Did you even care that he lied? Did you even care that you missed five years of my life because of him?” His son angrily yelled, tears now running down his beautiful face.

“Of course I cared,” Justin said, his voice as gentle as he could make it. “You have no idea how hard it was for me when I found out the truth and how long it took me to move on from what had happened. I was just as angry as you are now when I found out...”

“Yeah, but you forgave him. I will not! And I won't forgive you either...”

Justin knew that there was no point in talking to Luke now, not when everything was still so fresh and he was that angry. Instead he turned towards the sports bag. “Where are you going?”

“I don't know,” Luke muttered. “It's not like there's anyone in this family that I can trust. They were all in on it and you forgave all of them as well!”

“Luke, you're 15. You don't have any money,” Justin pointed out.

“I have money. I saved from my birthday,” Luke shot back.

“But you're still 15. You can't stay anywhere without us signing for it. Please, honey...”

“I will leave! I am not going to stay here with the two of you. I will figure it out,” Luke muttered as he grabbed the sports bag.

Justin looked at his son and felt a sense of panic rise inside of him. He knew that Luke was serious and would leave. And he knew enough about what could happen to young boys his age on the streets on their own which was a fate he couldn't even bear to think about. Remembering something Luke had said earlier, a thought came to his mind.

“Emmett didn't know,” he said, looking at his son.

“What?”

“You said you couldn't trust anyone in our family because they were all in on it and lied as well...but... Emmett didn't know. He stopped talking to your Dad when he started ignoring me and ended all communication with me. Emmett never knew until I told him about you. He only found out after I did.”

“Good for him,” Luke muttered, heading for the door with the bag on his shoulders.

“Go to Emmett's,” Justin said, his voice almost pleading. “I know you're angry, I know you hate us, but I want you to be safe, Luke. I don't want you to get hurt out there. Go to Emmett, he'll take care of you and will make sure that you're okay. And you can trust him because he never knew what was going on. Please...”

Luke stopped in his tracks and seemed to consider what Justin had said.

“I will not stop you. I will even call the taxi for you and pay for it, but please... I just want to know that you'll be safe and taken care of. Emmett didn't know...,” Justin said once more, hoping that he could get through to his son.

“But he's friends with you and Dad even though he knows the truth...”

Justin sighed. If it was an option, he would have suggested for Luke to go to Daphne's, but she was too far away and as far as options in Pittsburgh went, Emmett was all he could come up with if he wanted to be sure that his son was taken care of.

“Yes, but you know, Emmett. Once you stay with him all that will matter to him will be your well-being. Emmett loves you and would never do anything you wouldn't be comfortable with. Just... please... you can trust Emmett.”

After staying silent for the longest minutes of Justin's life, Luke finally nodded. “Alright...”

Justin sighed in relief, thankful that he had at least gotten Luke to agree to that much. He knew that he couldn't ask for more. Not right now. He went towards Luke's bedroom door, looking at his son sadly as he left. “I'll call the taxi now.”

Luke just nodded but didn't say anything else.

Ten minutes later Justin stood in the hallway, calling up for Luke. “Luke, the taxi is here.”

Brian had heard Justin's voice and came into the hallway just at the same time as Luke came down the stairs with his sports bag.

“What's going on?” He asked, looking from Justin to Luke and back.

“Not now,” Justin said to his husband, throwing him a look that urged him to stay quiet for now. “I'll explain later.” He then turned towards Luke. “I've called Emmett. He knows that you're coming and is expecting you. Please, just stay with him, okay?”

Luke nodded at his father shortly, then left his home without another glance at either of his parents or without another word to them.

“What was that about?” Brian asked, frowning when he heard a car drive away outside.

“He doesn't want to stay here... I could get him to agree to go and stay with Emmett for the time being...,” Justin said, turning towards Brian. “It was the best compromise under the circumstances.”

Brian eyed Justin carefully and could see the strain of the previous couple of hours on his face. Even though he had a lot of things to say about that he knew that now was not the time.

“Why Emmett?” He asked instead.

“Because Emmett is the only one who didn't know at the time. He says he can't trust any of the family and... I think he was ready to run away... At least with Emmett we know that he'll be safe and taken care of. Emmett will look out for him.”

Brian nodded, knowing that it was true. Emmett loved their kids and would look out for Luke and his best interests.

“Are you okay?” Brian came over and brushed a strand of hair out of Justin's face.

“No... I am not okay,” Justin whispered, looking up at Brian as a single tear left his eye. “My son said he hated me and ran away... I am not fucking okay...” He then started sobbing and Brian held him close. As he held him close, he felt his own tears come as well.

They stood like that, hugging each other for several minutes, just allowing their tears and pain its course.

“I am sorry, Sunshine... so sorry,” Brian whispered as he tightened his grip around the man he loved more than anything, knowing that the pain that Justin was feeling right now, that the pain he was in right now, had been caused by him and his actions. That he was the one to blame for this. It was his fault that Luke had run away to Emmett's, his fault alone.

Chapter 16

An hour later Brian and Justin were sitting at the kitchen table, drinking from their cups of coffee.

Justin had just been on the phone and put his mobile back on the table when the call ended.

“That was Emmett,” he said quietly, not looking at Brian, but the cup of coffee that stood before him. “He said Luke arrived safely and that we shouldn’t worry. He’ll take care of him.”

Brian put down his cup, then reached out and took Justin’s hand. “You know that he will.”

Justin nodded, but didn’t say anything else. He looked at his coffee as if it offered the answers to life’s biggest questions.

“I think I’ll go to the studio for a bit,” he suddenly announced, looking up at Brian from sad, blue eyes. “Try to get some work done.”

Brian knew that Justin wasn’t going to the studio in the hopes of getting some serious work done. His studio had always been a place that gave him solace and peace and Brian knew that Justin desperately needed both right now.

They hadn’t talked much in the last hour, but the silence hadn’t been oppressive. They had both hung on to their own thoughts and knew that they would both need some time to come to terms with what had happened. They would talk, they would be there for each other, they would comfort each other, but sometimes they also needed time to face what had happened on their own and Brian knew that better than anyone. While he hadn’t wanted to leave Justin alone, he had secretly longed for some time on his own as well, so he could come to terms with what had taken place earlier. Therefore, he didn’t try to stop Justin, he didn’t offer that they could stay together, he didn’t offer that they could talk. Instead he just nodded, knowing that he could do with some time on his own as well. Not that he would have ever said so to Justin or would have left him alone, but since Justin was suggesting it himself, Brian felt like he could go along with his husband’s wishes.

“That sounds like a good idea,” he said gently, running his thumb over the back of Justin’s hand. “I think I might go and take a walk.”

“I am not trying to push you away… I just need some... time and space,” Justin said quietly, meeting Brian’s gaze, trying to convey with his eyes that this wasn’t about Brian and wanting to be away from him, but that this was about the need to just be alone with his feelings and emotions for a while.

“I know,” Brian replied. “And I understand. Better than you might think. I can do with some time alone myself,” he admitted.

Now it was Justin’s turn to nod. He knew Brian well enough to know that he usually prefered working through his feelings on his own before he was ready to talk about them.

They finished their coffees in silence, before Brian got up and took their cups, placing them in the sink. When he came back to the table, he pulled Justin up and held him close. He placed a soft kiss on his head, before he pulled back again.

“Go, take your time. I’ll be back in a while.”

Justin leaned back in and placed a soft kiss on Brian’s lips before he turned around and made his way towards the hallway and the stairs that would lead up to his studio.

He stopped in his tracks when he saw Gus coming down the stairs. Gus stopped as well when he saw his father.

“Gus…,” Justin started, looking at Gus from concerned eyes.

“I don’t want to talk right now,” Gus immediately said, his voice neither angry nor cold, but just sad.

Justin nodded in acceptance, knowing that there was no point to force him into a conversation if he wasn’t ready for it.

Alerted by hearing voices in the hallway, Brian joined them a couple of seconds later, looking from Gus to Justin and back. He didn’t say anything when he saw Justin shake his head and give him a look that asked him not to.

“I was thinking that I could head over to Grandma Deb’s and pick up Vicky. Spend some time with her and Jenny while I am here,” Gus said, not looking at either man.

“Yeah,” Brian replied. “I am sure they would both love that.”

“You don’t have to wait with dinner for us. We’ll get something on the way back,” Gus continued as he walked down the stairs and over to the coat rack to get his winter coat.

“Let me get you some money,” Justin offered, but his comment was waved away by Gus.

“Don’t worry about that.” Without another word he put on his coat and then left the house.

Brian and Justin looked after him before they turned to each other.

“At least he will come back,” Brian muttered, before he went to the coat rack himself to get his own woollen coat. “I’ll be back in a while, okay?”

“Okay,” was all Justin said, before Brian turned around as well and left the house.

As he made his way up to his studio there was no one left in the empty house to see the tears on his face.

***

Brian sat in his study and was looking at some designs for a new campaign on his laptop. He had been looking at the same drafts for nearly an hour now, though he wasn’t sure that he had really seen them or paid them any attention at all. His mind was somewhere else and not the least bit interested in focusing on work right now.

The walk in the grounds had helped clear his mind a bit and had helped him to work through some of the emotions that were fighting for dominance inside him right now, but the moment he had returned to an absolute quiet house, that had been gone.

Their house was hardly ever quiet and right now that quiet only reminded him more of what had happened earlier and why the house was quiet.

Luke was gone and staying with Emmett for the time being, Gus had left to spend the rest of the day with his sisters and Justin was still hiding away in his studio, trying to work through his own pain, pain that had once again been caused by Brian’s actions.

Brian was painfully aware that he was the one responsible for the drama that had unfolded earlier that day and he knew that the only one to be angry with was himself. He was the one to blame and knowing that didn’t necessarily make it easier to face Justin for that matter. He had secretly been glad when he had come home and Justin had still been locked away in his studio. At least it gave him a bit of time where he wasn’t confronted by the pain on his husband’s face and the sadness in his even more expressive eyes, both a constant reminder of how he had once again failed the one person he loved more than anything.

He had tried to distract himself from those thoughts by getting some work done, but that hadn’t worked. The moment he had settled in his office and had opened his laptop, the image on his screen, his desktop background, had been like a new punch to the gut. He had stared at the picture of them on their last family vacation together, a picture of him, Justin and their three kids, all smiling happily and looking excited as they had their picture taken in front of the sunset by their waiter when they were ready to leave their beachside restaurant.

It had taken him a long time before he had been able to pull his eyes away from the happy, sunkissed faces of his children and the shining eyes of his husband to open his email inbox. And even then he had only been able to think back to that image instead of being able to focus on the work he had wanted to do. Would they ever take pictures like that again?

He stopped his dark thoughts when he was pulled out of his reverie by an excited almost six year old that had just stormed into his office.

“Daddy!”

At least one of his children still seemed to be happy and excited to see him, he thought to himself as he looked up from his laptop towards the whirlwind making his way over to him.

“Hey, princess! You seem excited,” he said as he opened his arms and allowed Vicky to climb onto his lap, excitedly wrapping her small arms around his neck, covering his face in kisses.

“Gus took me bowling, Daddy! And I got 8 pins in one go. 8!” Her little face was shining bright like the sun, a big smile all over it.

“8? That is pretty good,” Brian agreed, hugging her close, not willing to let her go yet. Just hearing her excited voice and seeing her happy face did wonders to him. He couldn’t help but smile at her enthusiasm when five minutes ago smiling had been the last thing on his mind. She really was his little miracle, in so many different ways.

“Gus says that I will have a strike soon if I continue to practice,” she said, excitedly bobbing her head up and down. “Can you and Papa go and practice with me when Gus is gone? Please??? I want to win against him the next time he takes me bowling.”

“I am sure that we can arrange that,” Brian promised, looking at her happy face with a gentle smile on his own. “Maybe we can find some time next week,” he offered, smiling even wider when she squealed happily.

“Where is Papa?” Vicky then asked, looking at her father wide-eyed. “I want to tell him as well.”

“He’s up in his studio. Why don’t we go check on him? I am sure he’ll love to hear about your trip to the bowling alley.” Brian then got up and held his daughter close as they made their way towards Justin’s studio. He figured that Justin could use some cheering up as well and there really was no one better for that job than Vicky.

***

“There you go,” Justin said once he was done brushing Vicky’s long blond hair and had braided it into two plaits.

“Thanks, Papa,” Vicky smiled as she turned around and gave him one of her best sunshine smiles. She really was his daughter. Blond hair, blue eyes and the Taylor sunshine smile that everyone used to talk about.

When he looked at her though, he could also see so many things that were so typically Brian. The way she smirked, that special glint she got in her eyes when she was up to something and she most definitely had Brian’s nose.

“You’re welcome. You know I love doing your hair,” he replied, before he helped her into her pyjama and then led her to her bedroom.

She hopped into her bed and climbed under the covers. “Will you tell me a story, please?”

He sat down on the edge of the bed and looked down at her. “Daddy will.”

“I love Daddy’s stories,” she said as she allowed Justin to pull the blanket over her.

“I know you do. And he loves telling them to you,” Justin smiled, knowing that it was the truth. Over time bedtime stories had kind of become Brian’s thing to do with Vicky. Justin usually helped her with her bath and hair, but Brian would be the one to tell her a story before she fell asleep.

That had never been a conscious decision between the two of them, it had just sort of happened and gave them both some quality time with their daughter. Quality time that had done Justin the world of good today. Just having his daughter hug him, kiss him, being happy in his presence had done him the world of good. He hadn't been able to help but smile when she had told him all about her and Gus’ trip to the bowling alley and how excited she had been when Justin had agreed that they could go and practice some more some time next week.

Spending time with her had been exactly what he had needed after the events of the day and by now he felt a lot better than he had an hour and a half ago. She had managed to dispel some of his gloomy thoughts and had been able to distract him if only for a while.

He knew that she had the same effect on Brian and he had seen on Brian’s face how much calmer and more content he had seemed when he and Vicky had come to get him from the studio. He knew that telling Vicky her bedtime story would be good for Brian.

“I love you, Papa,” Vicky said, raising her head, so Justin could give her a goodnight kiss.

“I love you, too, princess! More than you’ll ever know…,” he whispered as he also gave her a hug for good measure. He then got up, running his hand over her hair once more. “Sleep tight, okay?”

“You, too, Papa!”

“I will,” he said, before he left the room, looking for Brian, so he could tell her her bedtime story.

He found him in the bathroom, cleaning up some of the mess they had created earlier when Vicky had had her bath.

“She’s ready for her story now,” he said, running a hand over Brian’s back as he came into the room.

Brian nodded, throwing the towel that he had been holding into the hamper by the door.

“I will go back to the studio for a bit if you don’t mind,” Justin then said, waiting for Brian to turn around so he would face him. When he didn’t, Justin walked around his side and looked up at him. “Why don’t you come and get me when she’s asleep?”

He knew that he had kind of been ignoring Brian earlier when he had stayed in his studio even though he had known that Brian must have been back from his walk by then, but he hadn’t done it on purpose. He had just needed some space. And while he still didn’t feel okay, he knew that he already felt a lot better than just a few hours ago. He didn’t mean to ignore Brian and knew that they would need each other to get through this. Therefore he had offered this invitation to his husband.

“Okay,” Brian agreed, understanding the offer for what it was. Justin’s invitation to talk and spend time together. “I better head over there before she falls asleep before I even get started,” he then said, leaning down to leave a gentle kiss on Justin’s forehead.

“She’s waiting for you,” Justin said, giving Brian’s arm a squeeze before the older man left the bathroom in the direction of Vicky’s room.

Chapter 17

“I thought you might have fallen asleep yourself,” Justin said when he heard the door to his studio open, but he didn't turn around, knowing that it would be Brian who had come to get him just as Justin had asked him to. “Did it take this long for her to fall asleep?”

When he didn't get a reply, Justin frowned and turned around. He stopped in his tracks when he saw Gus standing in the doorway of the studio. “Gus... I... I thought you were your father.”

“It's just me,” Gus replied quietly, before he took a step back and made to turn around. “I'll come back later when you're done in here.”

“Gus,” Justin started, but stopped when he saw how his son's shoulders tensed when he addressed him. It broke his heart to see Gus' reaction to him and it made him sad more than anything. They had used the studio together so many times before, had worked side by side so many times before and now Gus apparently couldn't even stand to be in the same room as him anymore. “I am nearly done. I was just cleaning up anyway. Stay. You can already get started. I'll be out of here in five minutes.”

“I don't want to talk,” Gus said, squaring his shoulders as he looked up and met Justin's gaze.

“I understand,” Justin nodded, looking at him sadly. “We don't have to. I'll just finish cleaning up and I'll be out of here,” he said as he took the brushes he was holding over to the sink and started cleaning them.

He heard Gus move into the room and could feel him move over to what had become his corner of the studio over the years.

Once it had become clear that Gus loved art and was incredibly talented, he had come to the studio with Justin lots of times and they had worked on many things together, Justin giving Gus advice whenever it was needed or he asked for it. The older Gus had gotten, the more he had created his own space in Justin's studio and Justin had let him. He had loved watching Gus set up in his own little corner and had loved just watching as he created his own beautiful art. They had worked together in perfect silence so many times before and it had always made Justin happy. Not like now when the silence between them pressed heavily on his heart.

Justin sighed and finished cleaning the brushes. He dried his hands and left the brushes to dry in their usual place. As he was ready to leave and give Gus the privacy the boy so obviously yearned, he stopped when he saw Gus standing in front of the painting he had last been working on. He saw that Gus was watching the painting intently, studying it in deep concentration.

Normally, Justin didn't like if people saw his work before it was finished, but he had long come to accept that sometimes it couldn't be helped, especially when two people were sharing studio space and working together in a small space like this. And yet, despite that, Justin had never even thought about getting a bigger studio or creating a second studio space somewhere on the grounds for Gus. He loved working with his son in the same studio more than he minded him seeing some of his work before it was finished.

“That's pretty dark,” Gus said quietly, never looking away from the painting. “Not at all like your recent paintings.”

Justin's recent paintings had been inspired by their honeymoon in Hawaii and by the tropical colours of the flowers and birds he had seen on the island, but Gus was right, this new painting was dark. It was a mix of dark colours all harshly fighting for dominance. The painting had been dominated by harsh, angry strokes which weren't his usual style at all. He had wondered earlier if he should get rid of it, but had then decided to leave it for now. Maybe he would like it more with some distance from today's events. And maybe not and he would get rid of it. Who knew?

Even though Gus couldn't see him, Justin just shrugged. He didn't really feel like explaining his current mood or why the painting had ended up looking like it did.

“I might get rid of it. We'll see,” he just said, getting ready to leave the room.

“Don't,” Gus stopped him with his words. “It looks amazing.”

“I don't like it,” Justin admitted, looking at the painting as well, trying to find anything in it that he liked, not really able to see anything.

“I do,” Gus said quietly, walking even closer to the canvas. By now he was merely inches away from it. “It shows exactly how I feel,” he admitted on a whisper. “It's really powerful.”

“Gus,” Justin said, looking at the painting, then at his son. “I know you don't want to talk and I respect that, but... I just want to know that you're okay. That you'll be okay,” Justin corrected himself immediately, knowing that it was ridiculous to assume that Gus would be okay under the circumstances.

“I won't run away like Luke if that's what you're afraid of,” Gus said, now turning away from the painting and looking at his father from hurt eyes.

“I wouldn't blame you if you did,” Justin admitted, meeting Gus' gaze head on. “I know that you must be angry with me and your Dad...”

“I am not angry,” Gus interrupted him at that point.

“You're not?” Justin was honestly surprised to hear that. His face must have shown his surprise because Gus shook his head to underline his statement when he repeated it.

“No, I am not.”

“Okay, I guess that's good.”

They looked at each other for the longest time before Justin felt like Gus wouldn't say anything more to him at this point. Knowing that he had promised him that he wouldn't make him talk, Justin forced himself to keep that promise.

“I'll leave you alone now, but Gus... if you feel like talking or maybe just yelling or whatever... your Dad and I are here, okay?”

At the same time as Justin had spoken, so had Gus. “I am confused, you know?”

Justin eyed him curiously. “Confused?”

“I've been thinking for hours and... I just don't understand. I just can't seem to understand why...”

“It's complicated,” Justin replied.

Gus' voice got more agitated when he continued speaking as if Justin hadn't said anything. “Why would he do that? I tried to wrap my head around it, but... I just can't understand. I just can't. He loved you, even then. I know because I saw him when he practised with me to be ringbearer at your wedding. He was so happy. I remember how he was smiling and he seemed so relaxed and just happy. And I know that it was because he loved you and was happy to marry you. So why would he do what he did just months later? And... why would you forgive him? How could you forgive him for doing something so horrible to you and Luke?”

Justin sighed, then slowly walked over to where Gus stood. He didn't touch him, but stayed close to him and looked at him when he gave him the answer he knew he deserved. “Your second question is a lot easier to answer than your first. I loved him. It's as simple as that. I loved your Dad. I always did and I know that I always will. He's a good man, Gus.”

When Gus just snorted in reply, Justin knew that he had to explain some more. “I know it's not easy to understand in light of what we told you today, but he is. Your father is a good man and has always cared more about my well-being than his own. What he did... in his own way, he thought he was doing it for my own good, to protect me.”

“Protect you from what? From having to be with him and raising your son with him?” Gus looked at Justin in confusion.

“In a way, yes,” Justin nodded, then moved over to one of the tables with art supplies and leaned against it. “Which really brings us to your first question, I guess. When... when I came back from New York... when I found out about Luke...I was so angry with your father. You have no idea! I was hurt, I was devastated... I felt pain and betrayal like I had never before in my life. And I blamed your father for all of it because he had been the one to make the decision to keep his pregnancy and Luke's existence from me. No matter what you or Luke might think, I didn't just forgive him as if nothing had happened or if what had happened hadn't mattered. Quite on the contrary... Your father and I barely talked for weeks...I could barely stand to be in the same room with him...It took us a long time to move on from what had happened, Gus. It was a long, painful process... for both of us.”

“I remember Dad telling me that you were angry with him because he had done something bad and I remember you telling me the same... That you were angry with him because of what he had done. I remember wondering what it could have been and I knew that somehow it had to do with Luke, but... I never really put two and two together...”

“You were only a small boy, Gus and what had happened had happened between your father and me...I know that we tried to explain it to you and Luke as well as we could without giving too much away...because we knew that you would know that something had happened. How could you not with us behaving the way we did? How could you not notice that something was off with me and your father avoiding each other as much as we could...” Justin's voice sounded pained as he went back to those days in his memories. “After a couple of weeks, I knew... and I think your father knew as well, that we couldn't go on like that. It wasn't fair to you and Luke. You and Luke deserved a happy childhood, not a childhood full of me and your father fighting or not talking to each other. So... with time... I knew that we would need to find a way to be around each other. For your sake as well as Luke's. And to be able to do that, we needed to move on from what had happened, from what your father had done... only that I couldn't because much like you now, I didn't understand why he had done it. How he could do something so painful to me. Because much like you I knew that he had loved me. Deep down, I have always known, even when I was angry with him and wanted to hate him. And just like I knew that he loved me... I have always loved him and I knew that I didn't want to stay angry with him for the rest of my life. I knew that I wanted us to move on from what had happened and even if not as partners, at least as friends for your sake and Luke's. So... I tried to understand the why as well. I needed to understand why he had done what he had done. How he could have done something like that to me and Luke and... we talked. Painful, but honest conversations and with time, I started to understand the why and I started to understand that what your father had done hadn't been done out of malice or because he was evil... In his own weird way he had done it out of love.”

“Love?” Gus shook his head in total disbelief. “Love had nothing to do with what he did...”

“Gus, what do you know about your father's parents? About his childhood?” Justin asked, his voice gentle. He knew that he had never really brought it up with his son, but he wondered if maybe Brian had at one point.

“Not much...I've heard bits and pieces from Grandma Debs and Dad himself, but... I don't know, I guess they sucked and he had a shitty childhood.”

Justin nodded, not surprised that Gus didn't really know much more than that. Brian had never liked talking about his childhood and parents and even though he had shared things with Justin, especially once Justin had been back in his life after everything that had happened, he wasn't surprised that he wouldn't have shared the same with his sons.

“That would be putting it mildly,” he therefore replied as he met Gus' gaze. “Your grandparents... they made your Dad's childhood a living hell. His father was an abusive drunk who would hit your Dad more often than not and... hit him badly. We're talking about broken bones on a pretty regular basis,” Justin said quietly, not surprised when Gus' eyes widened in shock. “And his mother... she was an alcoholic as well who hid behind her religion, pretending that everything was fine. She never did anything to protect your Dad from his father, instead she would go and blame your Dad for the sorry state of her life. They both did, really... All his childhood they would tell your father that they shouldn't have had him and that their lives would have been a lot better if they had had an abortion. In fact the very first thing his father did when he found out that your grandmother was pregnant with your Dad was to tell her to get an abortion. As religious as she was, she refused and insisted they get married. His father would then always blame your Dad for tying him down in a family and a life he had never wanted and his mother in return blamed him for the sad state of her marriage and life.”

“That's horrible,” Gus whispered, for a second seemingly forgetting his own anger and confusion over his father's actions and just feeling sorry for him.

“Yes, it was... And until your father met Grandma Debs when he was a teenager, he never had any love in his life. She was the first person that ever took him in her arms and gave him a hug...”

Gus looked shocked at what he was hearing. “I never knew it was this bad,” he admitted.

“Because your Dad didn't want you to know,” Justin said. “He didn't want people to know because he didn't want them to pity him,” he sighed, running a hand over his face before he continued. “A childhood like that... it leaves scars. Not just physical, but mental most of all and your father... They did quite a job on him, Gus. Growing up in that house, he closed his heart and told himself that he wasn't worthy of being loved. His parents had told him all his life, so sooner or later he started believing it. He felt that no one would ever love him because he wasn't worthy of being loved and to spare himself the pain of that, he decided to push people away before they could get too close. He told himself that he didn't need love in his life, that all he needed was enough money to have security and that would be all. When I met your Dad... he didn't believe in love, considered it something for fools and weak people. He only believed in sex and he despised every form of commitment there was. He didn't believe in relationships and until the night you were born, he had never loved anyone unconditionally...”

“Until you and me,” Gus said quietly.

“Yes... And he didn't know how to deal with it. He hadn't been prepared for loving you as much as he did and me? Well... he tried pushing me away, but I wouldn't let him. I think in the end he just grew tired of me not leaving, so he gave up,” Justin couldn't help but chuckle when he thought back to some of his brattier moments when he had first gotten to know Brian.

“But what does this have to do with his pregnancy?” Gus asked, still seeming confused.

“You know that your father is 12 years older than me,” Justin started, continuing when Gus nodded. “For most of the time that we were together and... when we planned to get married, there was this weird dynamic of your father paying for everything. Taking care of me because I didn't have the means to support myself. Your father paid for my education when my Dad kicked me out, your father let me stay in his Loft when I didn't have a place to go to, your father paid for my health insurance... everything really. And I hated being so dependent. I have always been rather independent and when the chance to go to New York came along, it was also a chance for me to finally become financially independent and to show your father that he wouldn't always have to take care of me. I know that your father never minded paying for these things... but I did. And when I was in New York... I loved being independent and working on my career. I loved trying to make a name for myself and even though part of me leaving was due to your father not being ready for a commitment like a wedding, a part of me also liked the opportunities I had in New York. And when your father got pregnant... he miscalculated my priorities so badly... In his mind, he thought that we would turn into his parents if he told me about the pregnancy...”

“What? That doesn't make sense,” Gus nearly shouted, looking at Justin from wide eyes.

“In a sense it does... Your Dad was scared that once I found out about him being pregnant, I would give up my life in New York and return to Pittsburgh to be with him. And he was right. If he had told me, I would have packed my bags the same minute and returned home right away. But not out of a sense of obligation like he thought, but because it would have been my dream come true. A career in New York was nice and yes, I guess I could see the appeal to some degree or I would have fought harder not to leave in the first place, but... a family with your father. Having a baby together. That was really my dream. For years I had these naive fantasies about us ending up together, having children, getting married and it just wasn't who he was at the time. It's the reason we broke up and were broken up before the bomb and his proposal. I wanted a family and a life together and he wasn't ready to commit, being scared of opening his heart to love. So when he found out that he was pregnant, his own childhood came back with a vengeance and all he could see was us turning into his parents. I would have given up my career for him and Luke and all he could see was me becoming this glorified housewife that would take care of the children while he made the money. He assumed it would be a life I couldn't be happy with and that maybe not right away, but over time I would come to resent that life and would turn into his father, blaming him for keeping me tied in a life I had never wanted. In his mind, I would come to resent him and Luke like his father had come to resent him and his mother and more than anything he wanted to save Luke from that. More than anything he never wanted to have a child of his own to have a childhood as horrible as his own. So... instead of talking to me and finding out how I felt about his pregnancy, he came up with this plan of pushing me off another cliff and pushing me out of his life. He thought that he was protecting me from a life I wasn't ready for and didn't want and was allowing me to have the life I had always wanted, becoming a famous artist and all and at the same time he would protect Luke from having the same kind of childhood he had had... Only that your father couldn't have been more wrong,” Justin ended on a whisper. He wiped away the tears that had run down his cheeks, before he continued. “I would have loved Luke. I would have loved coming home to start a family with your Dad. I wouldn't have hesitated for a second because... I could have worked on my career from Pittsburgh. I could have happily given up my career and just loved him and you and Luke, because having a family with your Dad was my biggest dream, but... it wasn't meant to be... Not then, at least. Your father had been so impacted by his own childhood, so traumatised... that a future where we would end up like his parents was the only future he could see for us and at all costs he wanted to protect me and Luke from that pain and... in the process he hurt all of us more than anyone else ever could have.”

“So he never realised how wrong he was until you came back?” Gus asked, still trying to understand everything about the complicated situation they were now in.

“He told himself that it was the best thing for everyone involved and...,” Justin sighed, looking at Gus imploringly. “You have to understand that it wasn't easy for him to come to that decision. Your Dad didn't want to be a single father... Your Dad loved me and I know that he would have loved for us to raise you and your brother together, but... he didn't see any way that we could, so he thought it was better to end our relationship, to break off all contact with me and ensure that Luke and you had a happy childhood. It wasn't until you came to live with him that he started to work through his own childhood trauma,” Justin explained. “When you went to therapy and he saw that it was helping you, he started going as well and started to work through all the damage his parents had done and while I think he has always known on some level that what he had done had been wrong, he only realised then why he had done it and by then... the damage had been done... “

“He could have told you then. That still would have been years earlier than you found out on your own,” Gus exclaimed, looking at Justin from eyes that showed how he wanted to understand but couldn't.

“I guess, but... until I returned... he could pretend that even though he might have made the decision for the wrong reasons, it was the right decision after all. Every show that I had, every article that got published about me and my work just confirmed to him that he had done the right thing and until I returned home that day... he never realised how wrong his decision was and how much it would hurt me. That day... when I saw Luke for the first time... He realised immediately how wrong he had been about my reaction and Gus, your father has felt guilty about what he has done ever since... I know it might not mean much to you, but... your father regrets what happened more than anything and the guilt has nearly eaten him alive... It didn't only take me a long time to work through my pain over his betrayal, it also took a long time for him to work through his guilt over what he had done to all of us. That guilt pushed him right back to feeling unworthy of being loved and... it caused a lot of damage, Gus. You might think I just forgave him because I loved him, but... it took us a long time to work through what had happened. We went to therapy together for a long time to move past what had happened and your Dad went even longer on his own... We both had to put in a lot of hard work to move on from our past, but... I never doubted or regretted my decision to do so because I always loved your father just like I know that he always loved me...”

“And you did, didn't you? I mean... you got married and... you always seemed happy,” Gus said.

“We were... we are,” Justin agreed with a small smile. “I love your father, Gus. And I know that some people might not understand how or why I can still love him after everything that's happened, but... I know that he never set out to hurt us out of malice. Due to his own childhood trauma he had been conditioned to believe that it was the only way he could make sure that his child would grow up happily and... even though it was wrong... even though it hurt me more than anything ever did before in my life... I know that he did what he did out of love for your brother and me.”

Justin slowly walked over from the desk he had been leaning against and stopped in front of his painting. “I don't expect you or Luke to understand that... Maybe your Dad is right and I am really the only person on this planet who can understand how his mind works, but... yeah, I understand why he did what he did and forgiving him was one of the best decisions I ever made in my life. I wouldn't want to miss these last ten years together with you, your brother and Vicky for anything in the world.”

Gus eyed the painting once again and slowly started to understand the motivation behind it. He started to see the painting in a new light as he looked at it again. “This is not about being angry with Dad, is it?” He nodded towards the dark painting that was full of harsh paint strokes. “You're not angry with him.”

Justin shook his head slowly. “No, I am not... I haven't been angry with your father about this in a long time... I know why he did it and maybe I am the only person on this planet, but I can understand his reasons and even though they were wrong... I forgave him a long time ago. No, I am not angry with him.”

“Then... who are you angry with?” Gus asked, turning to look at Justin with a frown on his face.

Justin shrugged and smiled sadly. “The situation... for once again coming and having an impact on our lives, but mostly myself really...”

“Yourself? Why would you be angry with yourself?” Gus sounded utterly confused. “You didn't do anything wrong.”

“We'll have to disagree on that,” Justin said quietly, turning towards the painting once more. “Luke was right with one thing he said earlier even though he might not have meant it that way...”

“What?” Gus frowned.

“I let your father get away with it,” Justin said, his voice very quiet. He turned around and met Gus' questioning gaze. “I know your father will never agree with me, but I am not innocent in all of this... He was only able to do what he did because I let him. The same for your mother. I know you said you don't blame me for what happened and that you know it was her, but she couldn't have gotten away with it if I hadn't let her. And that's something I will always have to live with,” Justin finished, his voice hardly above a whisper. “My own two big regrets over what has happened.”

“You can't be serious,” Gus said, looking at Justin intently.

“Oh, I am dead serious. Gus,” Justin sighed, trying to explain what he meant. “I knew that your father had pushed me off some cliff, had pushed me away and kicked me out of his life for a reason. At the time I thought that maybe he was sick again, but... instead of really finding out the reason, I was so angry and hurt that I accepted that I had been pushed off the cliff and stayed away. If I had just insisted on being told the truth, if I had just fought harder to defend my place in his life... And before you say anything, I could have. There was no reason why I couldn't have come back before. It was my decision to stay away until I had made a name for myself and become successful. I could have come back weeks, months, even a year after your father pushed me away and could have demanded the truth. He couldn't have hidden from me forever. But I didn't. I stayed away. I didn't come back to Pittsburgh for five years and that is on me, Gus. Just like it's on me that your mother got away with her lie. Yes, she lied and yes, she was only able to do so because your father had pushed me away first, but... I came to see you for months after your father and I had broken up. When she said that I shouldn't come anymore because it was causing problems with your Dad, I shouldn't just have accepted that. I should have confronted your Dad and should have fought for my place in your life. I should have asked him why all of a sudden after months of me seeing you he suddenly had a problem with it and... I would have found out that he didn't. Your father never said anything like that. Quite on the contrary, he was happy that I continued to see you because he knew how much I loved you and how much you loved me... He would have never demanded anything like that because he knew how much we meant to each other but instead of trusting my gut feeling and confronting him about it which could have ended everything years sooner, I hid behind my pain and anger and stayed away. And that will always be on me, Gus, not your father, not your mother... that's my fault.” Justin then turned towards the painting. “I guess when I started painting today, I was feeling particularly angry at myself for not having fought harder for my place in your father's life... for my place in your life....”

Justin stopped and gasped when he suddenly found himself engulfed in a crushing hug by his son.

“You are unbelievable, you know that? Only you would go and blame yourself for something that's not your fault at all,” Gus whispered, holding his father close. “You were always there for me... you loved me, you supported me, you made me your son... You have nothing to blame yourself for, Papa! Nothing!”

“Oh Gus,” Justin whispered, hugging his son back, feeling new tears leave his eyes. “It's not as easy as that.”

“It is to me,” Gus replied, looking at his father from eyes that were filled with unshed tears. “I love you and for as long as I remember you have always loved me... I couldn't have asked for a better father... better fathers, really. I know that I might never fully understand why Dad did what he did, but I know that when push comes to shove... I couldn't have asked for a better father either. Dad has always been there, in his own way and once everything went down with my mothers... He was always there for me. And for Luke as well... We were so lucky that he loved us so much.”

“He did,” Justin agreed, pulling back from Gus' embrace, and looking at his son's face. He gently wiped away the tears on Gus' face. “It's the one thing I always knew and never doubted, no matter how anrgy I might have been with him. I always knew that he loved you and your brother and now Vicky as well more than anything else in the world and that he would do whatever he could to make sure you would grow up happy.”

“He changed his whole life for us... I guess I never realised it, but he did, didn't he?” Gus asked, looking at Justin for an honest answer.

“Yes, he did... but not because anyone forced him to, but because he wanted to. He wanted to be the best father possible and wanted you two to be as happy as you could be,” Justin said, knowing that it was true. It was the one thing he had always known about Brian. “And more than anything it hurts him right now to know that you two are hurting because of something he did. He never wanted to hurt you...”

“Just like he never wanted to hurt you,” Gus said slowly, slowly starting to understand some things about his father that he hadn't before.

“I know that you and Luke might be angry and you have every right to be, but the truth is that at the end of the day, you couldn't ask for a better Dad. You couldn't find a father more dedicated to making sure that you and your siblings would always be happy and well,” Justin said, knowing that it was the truth.

Gus nodded then pulled Justin close once more. “I love you... both of you... I do, but... I think I just got overwhelmed by everything you told us today.”

Justin wrapped his arms around Gus once more and held his son close. “I don't blame you. It's a lot to take in... Just know that I love you, Gus... that we both do.”

“I know,” Gus whispered, kissing his father on his cheek. “I love you, too...”

They stayed in their hug for several minutes, before Justin pulled back. “Are you okay?”

“I think I will be,” Gus nodded, trying to smile at his father. “You can go and check on him. It's okay.”

“No, I don't want to leave you on your own,” Justin said, shaking his head. “Not when you need me.”

“I think I am good for now and you have given me a lot to think about,” Gus said, letting go of his father and looking at him as encouragingly as he could. “You wanted to go and check on Dad an hour ago already. I kept you here long enough.”

“You haven't kept me,” Justin contradicted. “Making sure that you're okay is all that matters right now.”

“I am,” Gus promised, looking at his father with a real smile now. “And someone needs to look after Dad as well... I know that you two are hurting... I know that you're hurt by Luke leaving and... I understand that you need time together... Go and check on Dad and make sure that he's alright. I am fine. I am,” Gus said, when he saw his father's doubtful look. “You explained a lot that I didn't understand before and I need some time to really work through all of that, but... I am a lot better than I was earlier. I promise.”

“Are you sure?” Justin asked, and his face and his voice both showed his reluctance to leave Gus on his own right now.

Gus nodded. “Go and check on Dad. I'll be in here for a while, painting and... I'll be fine. I love you, both of you. I mean it.”

“I love you, too... You're a good boy, Gus,” Justin said full of emotion. He held his son close once more. “The best son anyone could wish for.”

“Don't let Luke hear that,” Gus joked, but then stopped. “He'll come back. I know he will. He just needs some time, Papa.”

Justin sighed, then nodded. He knew that Gus was right. “I know... I know he does. I didn't get over what happened in a day either, so it was foolish to expect that you two would. And for the record, you both are the best sons anyone could wish for.”

Gus chuckled slightly, before he pulled back. “We'll be fine. All of us. You and Dad have raised us to overcome anything life throws at us and I know that we will.”

“I love you, Gus,” Justin said once more, then pulled back. “And now I am leaving...but if you need to talk some more, you know that we're here for you. No matter what time...”

“I know,” Gus nodded and watched with a smile as his father reluctantly left the room.

Chapter 18

Justin made his way through the house and after a quick stop in the kitchen to get himself a bottle of water headed towards Brian’s office. He figured that Brian had probably gone back to his own sanctuary for whatever reason instead of coming to get Justin as Justin had asked him to. He just hoped that Brian wasn't pulling back from him. Right now, Justin wasn't sure if he could handle Brian putting up his walls. With everything going on, he needed Brian more than ever now and he wasn't sure if he could handle having to break down his walls on top of everything else.

At least the conversation with Gus had ended well and it had left him feeling slightly better and more optimistic that things would turn out alright in the end. Gus had seemed okay all things considered when their conversation had ended and Justin hoped that he would be. It would be a huge weight off his shoulders to know that Gus was alright.

When Justin entered Brian's office, he frowned when he found the lights turned off and the office in complete darkness.

“Brian?” He asked, not surprised when he didn't get an answer back. He seriously doubted that Brian would be hiding in the dark. He turned on the lights and found the office completely empty.

Deciding to check in the master bedroom next, hoping that Brian might have just hidden away there or gone to bed early, Justin headed there next, once again only finding a completely dark and empty room.

Not knowing where else to look for Brian, he headed for Vicky's room. He knew that Brian had gone there to tell her a bedtime story and he wondered if Brian would still be in the room two hours later.

He found the door to Vicky's room slightly ajar and opened it quietly. When he looked inside, his heart melted at the sight in front of him and he couldn't help but smile gently at what he saw.

His missing husband was lying in their daughter's bed, sleeping peacefully with their little girl tucked safely away in his arms. A warm feeling spread all through Justin's heart and stomach as he walked closer and saw the way Vicky was held by her father. Much like Justin would be held by him as well.

Brian's arms were holding her safely in place while her head rested gently on his chest. Both of them looked absolutely peaceful and content.

Justin wondered how they had ended up like that but knew that it didn't really matter. He could see that the worry lines that had been edged into Brian's face earlier were gone and he looked absolutely relaxed. He looked years younger as he was sleeping with his daughter safely held in his arms. And Vicky looked absolutely peaceful and cute as well. Her head rested on Brian's chest and one of her small hands was resting on Brian's stomach, her face showing how comfortable she seemed to be where she was.

Wondering if he should wake up Brian or not, Justin decided against it in the end. He didn't have the heart to wake Brian, not when he seemed to have found some peace and quiet here with Vicky. Justin knew that the position in her small bed would probably be uncomfortable if Brian stayed there all night, but for now he seemed fine and Justin didn't have it in him to wake him up now. Not when he seemed to have found some rest for which Justin was grateful.

He had seen all day how bothered Brian had been by what had happened and while he had wanted to be there for him, he knew that he needed to work through his own emotions first before he could help Brian with his. And more than that Justin knew that Brian hadn't been ready to talk to him. That much had been clear to him when Brian had locked himself away in his office after his walk instead of coming to look for Justin.

Brian had never been good when it came to sharing his emotions and especially when it came to their past. Justin had learned by now not to push him and to give him the time that he needed and he knew that they would talk when they would both be ready. He hadn't been hurt by Brian not coming to look for him because he knew that Brian had needed the time alone to figure out his own feelings and he knew that whenever Brian was ready, he would come.

And much to Justin's relief it didn't seem like Brian had pulled away from him and had avoided him on purpose, but he had simply fallen asleep, a fact that made Justin smile.

He stayed in his place next to Vicky's bed for almost twenty minutes, just watching the gentle rise and fall of both their chests as they slept before he pulled himself away and forced himself to leave them alone.

Once in the master bedroom, Justin decided to take a quick shower and then didn't quite know what to do with himself. He still felt emotionally raw, even though it wasn't as bad as earlier, but he knew that watching some TV or reading wouldn't cut it. Not tonight.

He wandered around the room for several minutes until his eyes settled on a shelf and he knew what he wanted to do.

***

“Hey, there you are,” Justin said as Brian came into the room an hour later, his hair sticking out in all directions and his eyes still filled with sleep and exhaustion.

He frowned when Brian didn't reply to him and just walked over to the bed wordlessly to pick up a pillow. He then turned around and headed back for the door.

“Brian?” Justin frowned, not quite sure what to make of this behaviour. “Where are you going?”

“The guestroom,” was all Brian muttered, confusing Justin even more.

“What? Why?” Justin had been sitting up in their bed, looking at an old photo album which he now closed and put away on his bedside table.

When Brian just continued towards the door, Justin made to get out of bed and threw back the covers. “I asked you a question. Why?”

Brian turned around and looked at Justin. When he met Justin's gaze, Justin could see that he looked beyond exhausted, most of all emotionally. His eyes were filled with a deep sadness that Justin hadn't seen there earlier. At least not like this. “It's quite obvious that I am not welcome here, so let's save us both the time and let me go to the guestroom.”

“What are you talking about?” Justin felt beyond confused, not quite sure what Brian was talking about. Where had he gotten the idea that he wouldn't be welcome in their bed? “I didn't say anything like that...”

“You didn't have to. Your actions were quite clear,” Brian just muttered, before he turned away again and made to open the door.

“My actions? Excuse me?”

“Sunshine, please. I am tired and I just want to sleep, so let me go,” Brian sighed.

“Yeah, so am I. And I would like to sleep in my husband's arms, but for some reason he has gotten it into his head that he wants to sleep in the guestroom instead of our bed and I'd really like to know why!” Justin angrily shot back, walking towards Brian and the door. “What is this about, Brian?”

“You didn't come and get me,” Brian just muttered, not looking at Justin.

“What? What are you talking about?” Justin frowned, still not sure what was actually happening.

“Why didn't you come and get me after I fell asleep in Vicky's room? You must have known where I was, but you didn't come, so obviously you couldn't care less where I am sleeping tonight...,” Brian said, still refusing to look at Justin.

“You are kidding, right?” Justin just shook his head in absolute disbelief. Brian couldn't be for real.

“I am dead serious.”

“Yes, I knew where you were because I came looking for you when you didn't come to the studio like I had asked you to. And yes, I found you asleep in Vicky's bed and excuse me, but you looked so peaceful and relaxed that I couldn't bring myself to wake you up. After the day you had, the day we both had, I was glad that you had gotten some rest and I didn't have the heart to wake you up when for the first time in hours the worry lines on your face had finally disappeared and you finally looked relaxed and content,” Justin snapped, not able to hide his anger at Brian's behaviour. “That doesn't mean that I don't want you here or wouldn't have liked to talk to you... It just means that I didn't have the heart to wake you when you finally looked peaceful. I wanted you to have that for a while longer. Sue me!” Justin angrily crossed his arms in front of his chest and stared at Brian's back.

“I know that you're angry with me,” was all Brian gave back, his voice quiet and sad.

“Did I say that I was?” Justin asked and wasn't surprised when Brian didn't reply. “Did I say that I was angry with you?”

After the longest pause Brian finally shook his head.

“Then stop putting words in my mouth. I am not angry and I haven't been,” Justin sighed, hating when Brian just assumed how he was feeling instead of asking him or listening to him.

“How can you not be?” Brian whispered, still not moving away from the door and still holding on to the door handle.

“I don't want to fight with you, Brian, I really don't. Not today after everything that has happened, but right now you're really starting to piss me off. Can you stop assuming what I am feeling and can you stop thinking that you know better how I feel than I do? I am not angry with you! But I am about to get angry because this conversation is making me angry,” Justin admitted, his voice still having an edge to it. “If this is about earlier, yes, I needed some time alone to work through some things, but I wasn't angry with you. It was about me and my feelings and had nothing to do with you. If I were angry with you, I would tell you. At least give me that much credit.”

Justin then made his way back to the bed, angrily pulling the cover back before he sat down and covered himself against the cold.

“I am not angry with you, I didn't ask you to sleep in the guestroom and like I said, I would really like to sleep in my husband's arms tonight, so can you please move away from the door and make your way into the fucking bed?”

Brian didn't move for a couple of seconds, but then slowly made his way over to their bed, much to Justin's relief. He wordlessly put the pillow down, before he moved towards the bathroom.

Justin watched after him as he disappeared for a few minutes to brush his teeth and get ready for bed. When Brian returned a few minutes later, Justin watched as he made his way back to his side of the bed and climbed under the covers.

“Thanks!” He said, his voice a lot warmer now than it had been before. He held out his hand and was relieved when Brian took it and squeezed it. “I mean it, Brian. I don't want to fight with you right now. I can't... I can't fight with you as well... I need you right now,” he whispered, surprised by how emotional his voice sounded all of a sudden.

Justin felt how strong arms encircled his upper body and willingly went into Brian's arms as he pulled him close. “I can't do this on my own, Brian... I need you...,” he whispered again, before he felt tears run down his face.

“I am sorry,” Brian whispered, holding Justin close, running a comforting hand up and down his back. “I really am.”

Justin nodded in his arms, accepting the apology, knowing that Brian was. He knew that Brian hadn't meant it and that sometimes he just struggled to accept that Justin's emotions didn't work the same way his did. He stretched his arms out and put them around Brian's upper body, pulling him closer.

They stayed locked in their embrace for several minutes, not talking at all. When Justin finally stopped crying and had calmed down, Brian pulled back and gently wiped away the tears on his face.

“I am an idiot... I am sorry.”

“You are,” Justin replied, but there was no anger in his voice, mostly slight amusement. “But you're my idiot.”

“I doubt that anyone else would have me,” Brian argued, happy when he couldn't hear any anger in Justin's voice. “So it seems like you're stuck with me.”

“I think I don't mind,” Justin whispered, before he gently pushed Brian down onto the bed and rested his head in his favourite spot on Brian's shoulder. He rested his hand on Brian's stomach, running small circles over it with his fingers. “I mean it, Brian. I am not angry with you. I haven't been angry with you about this in a long time...”

“I wouldn't blame you if you were,” Brian whispered in an equally low voice. “God knows I would deserve your anger and more.”

“Why? Because we talked about a part of our history that is ten to fifteen years in the past with our sons? Nothing we told them today was news. We've been there, we've lived it and we've moved past it... Why would I be angry now when I haven't been in so long?” Justin frowned, not understanding why Brian would think that Justin would suddenly be angry with him after all these years.

“Because now Luke isn't talking to you and it's all because of me,” Brian said, his voice still hardly above a whisper. “It's my fault he's angry with you...”

“I know that you think you're god-like, but to think that you're actually God. That's a new one,” Justin muttered, before he pulled back slightly, so he could look into Brian's eyes. He wasn't surprised to see hurt and pain in those hazel eyes he loved so much. “Luke is angry with me because of how I reacted to what you did. You are not responsible for my reaction and you're not responsible for his reaction to finding out... I won't lie... it hurts me to think that he's not here and I can't stop hearing how he said that he hated me in my head, but... he's angry with me because of my reaction to your actions and as much as I know you like to claim full responsibility for what happened, you were not responsible for me forgiving you. That was my call. Hell, if it was up to you, I probably never would have forgiven you because you didn't think you deserved to be forgiven. But if he's angry about that, that's something that he and I will have to work out. It's not your fault though, Brian.”

Justin felt Brian's arms tighten around him. He wasn't surprised when he heard the same pain he had seen in Brian's eyes in his voice when he spoke next.

“I am just so sorry that you got hurt once again... and that he and Gus got hurt... I wish I could stop them from getting hurt because of this.”

“Brian,” Justin said quietly, running a hand through his hair. “We knew we had to tell them at one point or another. They deserved to know the truth and... as much as it hurts, they also deserve their anger. At both of us! When I was in the studio today, I couldn't help but think back to how angry I was when I found out and... it was stupid to think that they wouldn't be just as angry. I wasn't able to forgive you in a day and I was stupid to think that they would... Yes, it happened a long time ago and yes, we have moved on from it, but they... they only found out the whole truth today and as much as it pains me to say, we need to give them time to come to terms with it. Just like I needed time and just like you needed time.”

Brian nodded, knowing deep down that Justin was right. “I know...”

“I am sorry if you felt like I have pushed you away earlier. I just needed some time...but I meant it when I wanted you to come to the studio and get me once Vicky was asleep. I don't want to do this on my own,” Justin sighed deeply before he continued, “I am not sure I can do this on my own... I need you, Brian. Just like I know that you need me right now, so... please... promise me that you won't shut me out and I promise you that I won't shut you out. I want us to try and work through this together. I love you and you know that I do. I wouldn't still be here after all these years if I didn't,” Justin finished, taking Brian's hand in his own, so that their wedding rings would bump against each other and make a metallic sound.

“I love you,” Brian whispered back, looking right into the blue eyes that were the windows to Justin's soul. “More than anything and I promise that I'll try to do better. I just... sometimes my head messes with me more than I'd like and...” Brian stopped, not quite sure how to continue. “I wish I were like you and could just follow my heart more.”

Justin smiled gently. “Hmmm, I think you're doing pretty good. Today were extraordinary circumstances for both of us, so we're allowed to get it wrong every once in while...” He then leaned down and gently kissed Brian.

When their kiss ended, he looked at Brian once more. “Just talk to me, okay? I need us to communicate, Brian. Don't just assume something when I haven't said it.”

Brian nodded, looking contrite. “I wish I had your strength and your patience, Sunshine. I know I am not making it easy for you.”

“You love me, that's all that matters,” Justin said sincerely, once more settling his head back in its spot on Brian's shoulder. “I don't care about easy. I only care that you love me and our children. As long as you do, we will make the rest work.”

“That I can do,” Brian promised, leaving a soft kiss on Justin's head. “You know I love you more than anything, Sunshine.”

“Now if that doesn't make me the luckiest bastard alive, I don't know,” Justin said, a tinge of amusement in his otherwise serious voice. “I love you, too. And I am glad you're here in bed with me, holding me... I always feel secure in your arms,” he admitted without any shame as he cuddled closer into Brian's embrace.

They were quiet for a couple of minutes, each hanging on to their own thoughts. Justin gently ran a hand over Brian's stomach while Brian ran his fingers up and down Justin's arm. They both craved this simple connection and the strength it gave them.

It was Brian who pulled back first, slowly sitting up again, pulling Justin up with him. He nodded over towards Justin's bedside table and frowned at the photo album he saw there. “What's that doing here?”

Justin blushed slightly, but then took the photo album and rested it on his legs. “I don't know... Looking at it comforted me...”

When Brian took the photo album from him and opened it, Justin couldn't help but notice a rather sentimental expression on his face.

“That was our first trip together...”

“To Disneyworld, yeah,” Justin agreed, running his hand over one of the pictures of him, Brian, Gus and Luke in front of the big Sleeping Beauty castle. “I still can't believe you actually set foot into the happiest place on earth,” he chuckled.

“The boys loved it,” Brian shrugged, turning over the page to more images from that trip. “It made them happy.”

“You enjoyed it too, I know you did,” Justin teased, looking at the images in the album with Brian.

“I had a good time, yeah,” Brian admitted, before he turned to another page with even more images. “It was our first vacation together... after everything... I just enjoyed seeing you and the boys so happy and ecstatic.”

“I loved how happy they were. So excited about everything...It was a good trip,” Justin sighed happily, the memories of that trip all over his mind.

“We should take Vicky, you know? She would love to go to Disney,” Brian said, looking at more pictures of them together on their first family vacation.

“Yeah, that would be nice. Maybe we can all go together,” Justin suggested, running his hand over a picture of the four of them together with Mickey Mouse. “When things have calmed down.”

“I can't see Gus in Disneyworld,” Brian said honestly, thinking that his 20-year old son would probably be bored out of his mind.

“He's more like you than you think. He would do it for Vicky because he would know how much it would mean to her to have him there,” Justin said, knowing that it was true. Gus would do anything for his baby sister. Even despite their age difference, they had always been close and Gus had always been incredibly protective of her. He loved her, nobody would ever doubt that.

“He's a good boy,” Brian said wistfully.

“They both are,” Justin pointed out, knowing that it was the truth. Considering all the things he and Brian had gotten up to in their teenage years, Luke and Gus were both incredibly good. They had never given them much trouble. Of course, there had been the normal arguments any teenager had with their parents about parties, alcohol and the likes, but all in all, they had been really lucky with their sons.

“Yeah, they are,” Brian agreed, before he closed the photo album with a sigh. He put it on his bedside table, then turned back to Justin.

“I spoke to Gus earlier,” Justin said when Brian was looking at him again. “He came to the studio to paint and... we talked.”

“Is he okay?” Brian asked, his voice laced with concern.

“I think so. He will be,” Justin said, once more resting his head on Brian's shoulder. “He wasn't angry, but mostly confused...so we talked a bit more and... I think he will be fine.”

“That's good,” Brian whispered, leaning his head against Justin's.

“Brian,” Justin started, taking his husband's hand and giving it a squeeze. “He was confused about some of the things that happened and why they happened, so I tried to explain some things to him and... we talked about your family,” Justin stopped when he felt Brian's whole body tense immediately at the mention of his family. “I told him about... your childhood... some of it... so he would better understand what happened.”

Justin waited for Brian to explode, but much to his surprise it never happened. He knew how Brian's family had always been a sensitive subject for him and just feeling how tense he was now that Justin had brought them up, showed him how much of a sore subject they still were for the older man, but instead of getting angry with him for sharing something so private about his own past, Brian just took a deep breath and answered in a calm voice. Justin hadn't expected that.

“Okay.”

“I didn't know you had never told him, though I am not surprised... I just think... knowing some of those things helped him to understand better,” Justin explained. “I know it wasn't my place to share that with him, but... I think it really helped him to understand why what happened happened.”

“Don't worry about it, Sunshine,” Brian sighed. “He was bound to find out. And I guess you're right. It's all connected, so he probably needed to know.”

“When we were done talking, he said he loved us, both of us. He will be fine,” Justin whispered, running a hand over Brian's thigh. “We all will be.”

Brian nodded quietly, hoping that Justin was right. He slowly moved them down onto the mattress and lay down with Justin in his arms. He didn't know what he would do without the man by his side and once again, he thanked the Gods that Justin was in his life and loved him. His strength, his patience, his love had gotten them through so many crises before and he knew that they would make it through this one as well. As long as they were together, they would be fine. All of them.

Chapter 19

“Do you think we can have pancakes? I really want pancakes. I like pancakes.”

“I know you do. We all know you do.”

Justin smiled to himself when he woke up and heard the voices of his husband and daughter. He could feel that Brian wasn’t holding him any longer and felt his daughter’s small body resting against his back.

As had happened so many times before on so many weekends before, Vicky must have woken up early and must have decided to come into their room to talk to her daddy. As had always been the case, Brian was still a morning person and was up way earlier than Justin. He had always been the one to spend time with their children when Justin had still been asleep and if Justin was honest with himself, there weren’t many things he loved more than waking up to the sound of his husband’s and daughter’s hushed voices, engaged in an early morning conversation about pancakes or whatever else was on Vicky’s mind that particular day.

He loved these quiet moments and loved watching Brian in these unguarded moments with their children. He had loved seeing Brian like that with Gus and Luke and now loved seeing him like that with Vicky. It warmed his heart and made his stomach flutter.

“Because they are good, Daddy. Soooooo good. So can we have them today? Please?”

“I think that can be arranged. Once your Papa has woken up and is ready to think about breakfast, we can ask him nicely.”

“I hope he wakes up soon, I am hungry,” Vicky then said, her little voice sounding slightly impatient.

“You are always hungry. You’re my daughter. It’s genetic,” Justin chuckled, announcing that he was awake.

Before he had finished his statement, he found himself with an armful of Vicky, who had turned around in record speed and was now hugging him.

“PAPA! You’re awake!”

“Barely,” Justin admitted, but moved around and lifted his arm to welcome Vicky into a hug. “How long have you been up already?”

“Not long,” Vicky said, before she left a kiss on his cheek. “Papa, can we have pancakes? Please! I love pancakes.”

“Hmmm, pancakes sound good. I think I’d like some pancakes as well,” Justin nodded, kissing the top of her head, before he looked up and smiled up at Brian. “What about you?”

“I’ll stick to fruit salad,” Brian said with a gentle smile, which widened when Vicky pointed out that he would end up stealing most of Justin’s pancake anyway.

“She’s not wrong, you know?” Justin teased, before he slowly started to lift himself up and get up into a sitting position. Vicky immediately sat up as well and leaned against his side, happily resting her head on his chest.

“It doesn’t count if it comes off your plate,” Brian replied, before he sat up as well.

They stayed in bed for a couple more minutes before they finally decided to get up and move towards the kitchen to get breakfast done. Brian and Justin quickly brushed their teeth while Vicky patiently waited, Brian then went to help her get ready while Justin made his way down into the kitchen and got started on the pancakes.

A couple of minutes later he felt long, strong arms around his waist and happily rested his back against Brian’s chest. “Morning,” he sighed happily as he prepared the first pancakes. “Has she been up long?”

“About an hour.”

Justin nodded, happily smiling to himself as he worked on the pancakes. Brian gently kissed his neck and his throat, but behaved himself, knowing that Vicky would be with them any second.

“You okay?” The older man asked, tightening his embrace. “You look better this morning than you did last night.”

Justin nodded slowly, before he turned around in Brian’s arms and met his gaze. “I am okay. Not great, but okay. I know we need to give it time and… it hurts, but… I am fine. You don’t have to worry about me.”

“I always worry about you,” Brian whispered, leaving a gentle kiss on Justin’s soft lips.

“And I love you for it,” Justin whispered back, resting his forehead against Brian’s. “What about you? How are you?”

Brian shrugged in reply but didn’t say anything.

“Brian,” Justin sighed, looking at his husband reproachfully.

“What do you want me to say?”

“The truth,” Justin said, resting a hand on Brian’s chest where his heart was beating strongly.

“I feel pretty shitty. And it’s made only worse by the fact that there’s nothing I can do to change anything about this mess. I know that for now we have to give them time and need to be patient, but… I am not a patient man.”

“I know,” Justin grinned, not able to help himself. It was true though. Brian was many things, but a patient man he was not. “Just talk to me, okay?”

Brian nodded, then gave Justin another quick kiss before he moved away and started setting the table. They worked in silence until they were joined by Vicky a couple of minutes later.

They had a nice breakfast together and enjoyed the pancakes and as Vicky had predicted, Brian had eaten almost half of Justin’s pancake even though he had insisted that he didn’t want any and would stick to his fruit salad.

Just as they were about to finish breakfast and clear the table, Gus came into the kitchen.

“Morning,” he said sleepily as he walked in and headed straight for the coffee machine to get himself a cup.

“Morning, Gus,” Justin said, looking from Gus to Brian and back. He noticed that Brian had nodded in some form of greeting but hadn’t really said anything. Very different to Vicky, who had immediately gotten up from her place and run towards her brother, wrapping her little arms around his waist.

“Morning, Gussy! I will miss you when you leave. Do you have to leave? Can’t you stay?”

“You know I have to go back to school,” Gus said after he had taken a sip of coffee. “But I will be back soon.”

“When?” Vicky asked, never letting go of her big brother.

“I don’t know exactly yet, but Christmas is in three weeks, so I’ll definitely be back then.”

“Three weeks? That’s a long time,” Vicky said sadly, her voice close to tears.

“But you know that we will talk a lot and you can video chat with me all the time. And who knows? Maybe I’ll be able to come home before that.”

“Yes, please! Please come home! I miss you.”

“I miss you, too,” Gus said sincerely as he pulled her close and ruffled her blond hair affectionately.

He then slowly managed to get out of Vicky’s embrace and made his way over to the kitchen table where his fathers were still sitting and watching the whole scene silently.

“Can you take me to the airport later, Dad?” Gus asked, not looking at Brian as he asked his question, but looking at his coffee cup instead.

Brian seemed honestly surprised by that question and was quiet for a couple of seconds before he cleared his throat. “Yeah… sure.”

“Thanks! I was thinking I could take one of the cars into town and have lunch with Jenny. I can meet you at Grandma Jen’s for dinner later and you can take me from there?”

Brian nodded in agreement. “Yeah, sure.”

“Thanks, Dad,” Gus said, before he got up again. “How about we go and do something together before I head into town?” He suggested in the direction of his little sister who happily agreed right away.

“Gus, don’t you want some breakfast?” Justin asked, looking after his son and daughter as they headed out of the kitchen.

“I’m fine, Papa. I’ll have some fruit later before I head into town.”

They watched as Gus and Vicky left the kitchen, then turned towards each other.

“That’s good,” Justin said as he took Brian’s hand and gave it a squeeze. “He’s ready to talk to you.”

“Or he just wants to give me a piece of his mind before he leaves for New York,” Brian muttered, shuddering slightly.

“That’s not who Gus is, you know that. I think it will be alright,” Justin assured his husband, before he got up as well and started clearing the table.

***

“Daddy, when is Luke coming back?” Vicky asked, looking at her father from big, sad eyes. Gus had just left to head into town to meet with Jenny and now it was just her and her fathers.

Brian had promised to take her on a walk around the grounds and they were walking down a path they had walked many times before while Justin had stayed behind in the house talking to Daphne.

“I don’t know,” Brian answered truthfully, holding on to her small hand in his as they continued walking.

“Why not? Didn’t he say how long he was going to stay with Auntie Em? I mean, you always tell me I am staying for a day or two or how long. Didn’t you tell him?”

“It’s a bit more complicated than that, princess,” Brian sighed, as they passed some trees at the end of their property and slowly turned around to head back in the direction of the house.

“Why is it complicated? I don’t like complicated,” Vicky announced, looking up at her father from blue eyes that looked so much like Justin’s – and Luke’s.

“Neither do I,” Brian said, before he took his daughter and picked her up. With nearly six years Vicky was almost too big to be carried around, but for a short time it would be fine and Brian just needed to have her close. He took a deep breath before he continued speaking. “Your Papa and I had an argument with Luke. He is angry with us right now and that’s why he’s staying with Emmett at the moment.”

“Why did you argue?” Vicky asked, sounding genuinely curious.

“It’s a long story and way too complicated for someone your age. But it’s not Luke’s fault. He’s just angry with me and your papa right now and we have to accept that. We need to give him a bit of time and I am sure then things will get back to normal and he will come back home.”

“Do you promise?” Vicky raised her eyes to meet her fathers. Even at her young age she already knew that promises were very important and you only made a promise when you could actually keep it.

“I wish I could,” Brian said sadly, hugging her a bit closer. “But I can’t. It’s not up to me. If it was, Luke would be back home already, believe me. Now we just have to be patient and I am sure soon things will be back to normal.”

“Why is Luke angry with you, Daddy? You and Papa are always nice, you never yell, you are never mean. Why would he be angry? You are the best Daddy in the world.”

Brian chuckled, his heart warmed by his daughter’s enthusiastic defence of himself and Justin. “I am glad that you think so, princess! It means the world to me.” Brian rubbed his nose against his daughter’s before he let her down again and they continued talking. “A long time ago I did something that wasn’t good and Luke found out now and it made him very angry. Which he is allowed to be. So now, we just have to be patient and wait for him to be ready to talk to us again.”

“If you did something bad, can’t you just apologise?” Vicky asked, looking up at her father. “Papa said that’s what you should do when you do something wrong. You should apologise, say you’re sorry and never do it again.”

“And your Papa is right about that,” Brian agreed. “And I will apologise as soon as he will listen to me again. I can promise that!”

“Okay,” Vicky nodded. They walked for a few minutes in silence and it was clear that Vicky was thinking about what Brian had said to her. “Daddy? Will Luke be at dinner tonight?”

“I don’t think so,” Brian admitted, knowing that it would make Vicky sad, but not wanting to lie to her. He doubted that Luke would show up to their Sunday dinner at Jennifer’s place. Not when he was still so angry with them and the rest of their family. “I don’t think he wants to see me or your Papa right now and he probably doesn’t want to see anyone else either.”

“Doesn’t he want to see me?” Vicky asked and Brian could see how glassy her eyes had gotten in an instant. He cursed himself for what he had said, knowing how it must have sounded to her and what she now felt. It must have felt like Luke didn’t want to see her either which would devastate her.

“Oh, princess. I am sure he would love to see you. He’s angry with me and your papa, but not with you. You know that Luke loves you very much. You’re his little baby sister and he will always want to see you.”

“And when can I see him? If he’s not coming home? I miss him,” Vicky cried, tears now running down her beautiful face.

Brian’s heart broke at the pain he saw in his daughter’s eyes and he picked her up once more, holding her tight.

“I know you do. We all do,” Brian whispered, running his hand over her cheeks, gently wiping away her tears. “Why don’t you call him when we get back to the house? I am sure he would love to speak to you. And maybe you can go and visit him at Emmett’s place some time next week and spend some time with him. Would you like that?”

Vicky nodded, tears still running down her face.

“Then that’s what we’ll do. We’ll call him when we get back to the house, okay?”

And that was what they did. After they made their way back home, Brian called Emmett’s house and asked Emmett if Luke wanted to speak to Vicky, explaining to him how much Vicky was missing her brother. Emmett promised to speak to Luke, admitting to Brian that Luke had mostly hidden away in his guestroom so far and hadn’t been very talkative, but he knew much like Brian did that Luke wouldn’t hurt his little sister. He loved her very much and they both were sure that Luke would agree to at least talk to her, if not to anyone else.

Ten minutes later, Emmett called back and Luke and Vicky got to talk for a couple of minutes. Vicky immediately cheered up when she heard her brother’s voice and she got even more excited when Luke promised that they would arrange something for the next day, so that Vicky could visit him.

***

“That was very nice of you,” Emmett said quietly, once Luke had ended the call and came into the kitchen to get something to drink.

Luke just shrugged. “It’s not her fault that her fathers are assholes.”

“Honey, you don’t mean that,” Emmett said quietly, looking at Luke from worried eyes. “Your dads love you very much. All three of you.”

“Whatever,” Luke just muttered before he grabbed his glass and headed for the stairs to the guestroom.

“Luke,” Emmett called after him, following him into the hallway. “Why don’t we sit down for a bit and talk? I know that you’re angry, but maybe talking about it will make you feel better. My aunt Lula always used to say that there’s nothing better than sharing your feelings with someone who cares about you. It will take a huge burden off your shoulders.”

“I don’t want to talk,” Luke just gave back as he continued up the stairs and closed the guestroom door behind himself.

“Alright, I got that,” Emmett sighed, looking after Luke with worry in his eyes.

Chapter 20

“Baby, how are you and Brian holding up?”

Justin shrugged as he allowed Emmett to hug him and hold him tight for a minute. “We’re trying to deal with it as best as we can… How is Luke?”

“Angry,” Emmett sighed, meeting Justin’s questioning gaze. “He hasn’t said more than ten words to me since he got here and has just hidden in the guest room. I tried talking to him, but he doesn’t want to talk.”

Justin sighed, but nodded, not really having expected anything else. Out of all their children Luke was the one who could hold a grudge like no one else and he was also what they had affectionately called their little drama queen. Nobody could get angry like Luke. While Gus was more the quiet, introverted type that dealt with his emotions on his own and tried to work through them on his own before he calmly tried to talk things over, Luke had always been the slamming doors kind of type. If Luke was angry, everybody would know right away. He had never been good at hiding his emotions and had always worn his heart on his sleeve.

“Is he here?”

“Yeah, he’s up in the guest room,” Emmett nodded. “Though I doubt that he will talk to you.”

“I just want to give him his school bag. He left it at Britin when he left yesterday and he will need it tomorrow. Has he said anything about dinner tonight?”

“He doesn’t want to go.”

“If it will help, Brian and I can cancel. That way he can go,” Justin offered immediately, not surprised when Emmett shook his head and looked at him sadly.

“Honey, it’s not just you and Brian. Try not wanting to see the whole family. He’s pretty angry with Debbie, your mom and Ted and Blake as well.”

“I guessed so, but… I was hoping. I don’t want him to be all alone and close himself off from everyone else,” Justin sighed, looking at Emmett for understanding.

“Gus was here earlier. They talked for a while,” Emmett offered.

“He was?” Justin frowned. Gus had mentioned going into town and meeting Jenny, but he hadn’t mentioned going to see Luke as well. Though there was nothing wrong with that. Justin was glad that Gus had looked out for his brother. As he always had.

“Yeah, he stopped by for about half an hour and they talked. There was no yelling, so I took that as a good sign. How is Gus? He seemed pretty okay all things considering.”

“I think he is,” Justin replied. “He talked to me some more last night and while he’s still struggling with things, he said he wasn’t angry with either me or Brian, but just confused. He spent the morning with Vicky and asked Brian to take him to the airport later, so I guess that’s good… Gus is a lot like Brian and he’s better dealing with emotions on his own before he starts talking to people, so maybe going back to New York will be good for him and give him a chance to do that. And then when he’s ready, he can talk to us again…”

“Baby, I know that it might not seem that way right now, but you and Brian did the right thing. They needed to know the truth, especially with Melanie around and her accusations.”

“Only that we haven’t heard from her at all since she was at Britin. I really don’t know what to make of her behaviour. I can’t worry about that though. Not at the moment…,” Justin ran a hand through his blond hair. “I know we had to tell them, I just wish there had been a way not to hurt them. It’s killing Brian and… I can’t stand the thought that they are going through all this pain right now because of something we did 15 years ago.”

“I know it sounds empty, but you just need to give them a bit of time to come to terms with what they have been told. They will both realise how much you and Brian love them and have always done so. And then they will come back to you as they always have, realising that you are both great fathers, no matter what mistakes might have happened in the past,” Emmett said, trying to sound as encouraging as he could be. As angry as he had been with Brian in the past concerning his behaviour towards Justin, it was the truth: Brian and Justin had always been great fathers and had always loved their sons more than anything and just like he and Justin and Daphne had been able to forgive Brian with time and had moved on from what had happened, he was sure Gus and Luke would as well.

“I hope you’re right,” Justin sighed, then nodded towards the bag with Luke’s books and stuff for school. “Better get this over with.”

“Baby, if you need me, just holler, okay? I am here for both of you,” Emmett offered then gave Justin a hug before he went into his kitchen, leaving Justin to talk to his son.

Justin made his way up the stairs and knocked on the door to the guest room. “Luke? It’s me,” he said, his nerves fluttering as he waited for a reaction.

“I don’t want to talk to you,” he heard the angry reply from inside the room, not really surprised by that.

“And you don’t have to,” Justin said, standing in front of the door. “I have your things for school tomorrow. Emmett told me you won’t be coming to dinner tonight, so I thought I would drop them off.”

There was silence for a few seconds after that, before the door was opened to Justin’s surprise.

“Thanks,” was all Luke said as he took the bag from Justin. He turned around again right away, obviously having decided that their conversation was over.

“Are you okay?” Justin asked quietly, looking at his son as he walked back into the room again.

“What do you think?” Luke asked angrily. “Would you be okay if you found out that your whole family had lied to you and that the people you considered family were liars and assholes?”

“No, I wasn’t okay,” Justin admitted, still not moving from where he stood outside the door. “I was a mess.”

Luke stopped and after a few seconds turned around with a confused frown. Justin met his gaze.

“It happened to me as well. They all lied to me. My family, the people I trusted. Your Dad, my mom, Debbie. Believe it or not, I know exactly how you feel right now.”

“You have no idea how I am feeling. You forgave all of them as if it was nothing, as if it didn’t matter at all.”

“That is not true, Luke,” Justin said quietly. “Yes, I forgave them, but… what happened always mattered. You have no idea how hard it was for me to forgive them, how much work it took me to forgive them. It didn’t just happen in a day, so… I know better than to expect that you would be ready in a day, but… I know that you’re angry with me for forgiving your father, but don’t think I did it because what happened didn’t matter. I have never been in as much pain as I was the day I found out the truth about you. I have never been as hurt by anyone…,” when Luke looked up at him with a question in his eyes, Justin nodded. “Yes, this was way worse than what happened at my prom. Way worse.”

They had always been honest with their children about the cause of Justin’s problems with his hand and the cramps he would sometimes have as well as the headaches he would occasionally get. While Vicky only knew that Justin had been hurt in the past and this was the result of that injury, Gus and Luke knew that Justin had been attacked at his prom and that Brian had been with him and had seen the attack.

“But you forgave them… you forgave him,” Luke just said, his voice still full of anger.

“Yes, I did, but it wasn’t easy. It took a lot of hard work and especially with your Dad… it took both of us a long time and a lot of painful, intense conversations to move on. It took me weeks to even be able to have a conversation with him… months before we got to something that resembled being comfortable around each other… And even longer for us to start a relationship again and to try to move on. I love your Dad, Luke. With all my heart. But the fact that we’re still together and that I married him doesn’t mean that what he did didn’t matter to me or didn’t hurt me. It’s the single most painful thing that has ever happened to me and your Dad knows exactly what role he played in that.”

“And yet you forgave him. How could you?” Luke spat, not moving from where he stood.

“Because I loved him,” Justin shrugged. “It’s really as simple as that. I loved your Dad and… even though he had hurt me, even though he had caused me more pain than anyone else in the world ever had, I knew why he had done it. I knew that what he had done had happened because in his own weird way, he loved me and thought he was protecting me. Nothing that he did was done out of malice, Luke. Your father thought he had to keep you a secret from me for my own good and more importantly for your own good.”

“My own good? That doesn’t make any sense. So on top of everything else he thought you would be a bad father?”

Justin shook his head, knowing that he needed to explain more. So he told Luke the same he had told Gus the night before. He told him about Brian’s childhood, told him about the trauma that childhood had caused, told him about the kind of relationship they had had before any of this had happened and last but not least, he told him about Brian’s reasons for keeping his pregnancy hidden, his fears for Justin’s future and for Luke’s future if Brian had told Justin the truth.

“He really only meant to protect you and me and wanted to give you a happier childhood than he had. He went about it all wrong, but… he didn’t do it out of malice or because he’s evil… it was the only way he thought he could protect you and me.”

“And you believe that?” Luke asked, looking at his father in total disbelief.

“It doesn’t matter if I believe it or not, it’s what your father believed at the time,” Justin said matter-of-factly. “And with the help of therapy and intense conversations, we were able to work through those reasons, to understand them and to move on. Luke, you have a right to be angry, but don’t be angry because I forgave your father like it had been nothing. That was never the truth. Yes, I forgave him, but I never forgot. And neither did he.”

“And neither will I,” Luke exclaimed, looking at Justin from furious eyes. “I will never forgive him! He’s a monster! Only a monster could do something like that to a person they claim to love.”

“Your father is not a monster and you know it, Luke,” Justin said quietly. “A monster wouldn’t have loved you the way he did. A monster wouldn’t have held you, comforted you, taken care of you the way your father did. He changed his whole life because he loved you that much. He wanted to be the best father you could wish for and I think… if you allow yourself that moment of truth, you know that he was always a good father to you and Gus.”

“If there wasn’t the little fact that it’s his fault that I didn’t have two parents in my life for the first five years of my life.”

Justin sighed, knowing that they had once again hit a point where talking to Luke wouldn’t do much good. Luke wasn’t ready to listen yet, so there was really no point in Justin trying to convince him of something he didn’t already think himself.

“I hope that one day you might see things differently,” he said sadly, looking at his son. “I love you, Luke. We both do… and… whenever you’re ready to talk, your Dad and I will be there to listen. To whatever you have to say.”

“Yeah, whatever.” With that Luke closed the door to the guest room, effectively ending the conversation with his father.

Justin shook his head, then went downstairs to look for Emmett, so that they could head to family dinner together. Brian had dropped him off earlier on his way to his mom’s house, so he could speak to Luke and he knew that Brian would be waiting to hear how it had gone. If only he had better news to share.

***

Family dinner had been a rather quiet affair as everyone in the family had been acutely aware of the reason for Luke’s absence.

While everyone tried to act as normal as was possible under the circumstances there was no doubt that the atmosphere was more downcast than it would have been at a normal family dinner.

Once dinner was finished, Brian and Gus left to head for the airport. Justin and Vicky had stayed and would leave for home in a while in the second car. For now they had decided to stay a bit longer and to spend some more time with their family.

Justin helped his mother clear the table while Vicky was sitting with her grandpa Carl and was listening to a story he was telling her. He smiled as he saw her happy face and the way she leaned into the older man as he spoke.

“Here you go,” he said as he handed the empty plates to his mother, so she could put them in the dishwasher.

“How are you, honey?” Jennifer asked, eying him from concerned eyes.

Justin shrugged. He didn’t really want to have this conversation with his mother right now, but he knew that she was just worried about him and his family and that she deserved some answers. After all Luke was her grandson and was angry with her, too.

“Okay. Hanging in there,” he sighed, then moved over to the sink, busying himself with cleaning some of the wine glasses standing there.

“And Brian? How is he doing?” Jennifer asked, not ready to let go yet. “He seemed very quiet earlier.”

“He’s hurting, he’s blaming himself, but… we’re hanging in there.”

“I am so sorry Luke reacted this way, honey. I know how much you have already been hurt and how much this has to hurt right now,” Jennifer said quietly, her voice full of emotion.

Justin could easily identify the guilt in her voice, knew that his mother still felt sorry about the part she had played in this whole mess, but he wasn’t really feeling like going over that once more. Not after the weekend he had already had.

“We always knew that we would tell him and Gus the truth one day. I didn’t get over it in a day, so I was stupid to believe that he would. He needs time just like I needed time and while he tries to come to terms with the truth, we just need to give him that time and offer to be there for him when he’s ready to speak to us.”

“Justin,” Jennifer sighed, seeing the pain her son was in and wishing that she could take it away from him somehow. “I know that you’re hurting. You don’t have to pretend that you’re okay when you’re not.”

“I am not pretending. We are hanging in there and we’re trying to make it through this. What else can we do? Am I hurting because my son told me that he hated me? Yes, I am, but there’s nothing I can do about that now… He is allowed his anger and I have to accept that anger. And whenever he’s ready to speak to us again, I will be there and will be waiting for him with open arms,” Justin said, meeting his mother’s concerned gaze.

“It’s just that none of it was your fault… I wish he could see that,” Jennifer said sadly, shaking her head. “He has no reason to be angry with you.”

“He has. He has every reason to be angry with me. I will not be the one to tell him how he has to feel. He is angry with me because he thinks he has a right to be and I can see where he is coming from. Who am I to tell him not to be angry with me but only with Brian when I am the one that forgave Brian, that forgave you and everyone else? I did that and he doesn’t like it, so he’s angry. I can understand why.”

“But,” Jennifer started, not quite sure how to continue. “You forgave Brian, you forgave us for him. So he could have a happy family.”

“Mom,” Justin sighed, shaking his head. He wasn’t sure if he should be angry with her, disappointed or just annoyed that she still didn’t seem to get it. “I didn’t forgive everyone for Luke to have a happy family. Yes, I wanted him to have a happy childhood and not one filled with tension and fights, but… in the end I forgave Brian and you and everyone because I wanted to. It was my decision that I made for various reasons. Yes, Luke was one of those reasons, but not the sole reason.”

Jennifer eyed her son for the longest time before she nodded slowly. “I just wish there was something I could do. I hate to see you hurting. I hate to see Luke and Gus hurting. Honey, if you want, I can talk to him. Try to explain to him.”

“Mom, he doesn’t want to see you. He doesn’t want to see anyone. He talked to Gus, but… he didn’t even talk to Emmett yet. He barely spoke to me earlier and he definitely won’t want to see you or Brian or anyone who was involved…”

“I just hate to see you in pain,” Jennifer said helplessly. “If there is anything I can do…”

“You can leave him alone for the moment, giving him the time that he needs. Promise me, Mom!” Justin looked at his mother seriously, hoping that she would listen to him.

“Of course, if you don’t want me to, I won’t get involved,” she promised, her face still full of sorrow. “I just…”

“I know,” Justin said, knowing indeed. He knew how his mother felt, he knew that much like Brian there was also a lot of guilt involved, but at the moment he really didn’t feel like there was anything he could do about that. He had enough on his hands with his own feelings and helping Brian to cope with what had happened. He couldn’t also help his mother. For now she would have to find her own way to cope with Luke’s anger. “Just… give him the time that he needs. I figured it out with time and I am sure he will, too.”

“Of course. He loves you and Brian so much. You have been such good parents to him. He will remember that and will talk to you again. I just know it.”

“I hope so,” Justin whispered, before he turned back to the sink. “I don’t know what I’ll do if he doesn’t…”

“Honey,” Jennifer said sadly, walking over and engulfing her son in a crushing hug. “If I know one thing about Luke, it’s that he loves you and Brian. Yes, he’s angry now, but he won’t be angry forever. You managed to forgive everyone and I refuse to believe that it will be any different with him. He will come back.”

Justin stayed in his mother’s embrace for several minutes, just letting her comfort him that way. Sometimes you needed your mother’s arms to give you comfort, no matter how old you were.

“I am sorry, Mom,” he whispered after the longest time, still not letting go of her.

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” Jennifer said seriously, knowing that it was the truth. Justin had been the innocent party in all of this.

“Yes, I do. I was a real brat when I was younger. I said so many things to you that I wish I hadn’t said. I can only imagine how much that must have hurt you,” Justin said, pulling back from his hug and looking at his mother. “I am sorry for saying so many nasty things to you.”

“Oh honey, don’t be ridiculous. I didn’t exactly make it easy for you either. You had every right to be angry with me when you were.”

“That didn’t give me the right to call you some of the things I did or to yell at you. Now that… now that Luke has said that he hates us, I know how much it hurts to hear your child say those words to you and… I wish I hadn’t ever said anything like that to you.”

“You knew what you wanted, honey, and you did everything you could to get it. You were very grown up and at the time… I wasn’t ready to see my baby grow up,” Jennifer replied.

“Now that I have sons that age, I know how outrageous some of my behaviour was. If Luke would bring a 29-year old guy home in two years, would go out partying every night, would drink and god knows what… Geez, I know I would lose it and I don’t even want to imagine how Brian would react…,” Justin actually chuckled, but he knew that he was right. He was very glad that his sons were way calmer than he had ever been at their age.

“But look at you now,” Jennifer smiled, running a hand over Justin’s hair. “You turned out well after all. You have a beautiful family, a husband that loves you more than anything, a successful career. I couldn’t be prouder of you, Justin!”

Justin saw the sincerity in his mother’s eyes and blushed slightly. “Thank you for loving me even when I made it really hard,” he whispered, leaning in once again and resting his head on her shoulder. “I love you, Mom.”

“I love you, too,” Jennifer gave back, kissing the top of his head. “I just wish I could have always shown you the way you deserved.”

“You were always in my corner and always had my back when it mattered. That’s all that matters to me.”

They stayed in their hug for another minute, before they were interrupted by Debbie coming into the kitchen.

“Sunshine, you’ve got one tired daughter in there. You better get her home before she falls asleep on Carl. That’s my spot,” she cackled, looking at Justin and Jennifer from curious eyes. “You guys okay?”

“Yeah, we are,” Justin said, smiling at his mother and then his surrogate mother. “We are.”

Jennifer nodded, then let go of Justin. “You better go and get her home. I’ll call you tomorrow, okay?”

Justin nodded, then kissed his mom’s cheek. He walked past Debbie, gave her cheek a kiss as well, then went to the living-room to get his tired daughter and head home.

Chapter 21

They had been driving towards the airport for ten minutes now, but so far neither of them had said a single word. They had driven in absolute silence. A silence that was eating at Brian and was driving him crazy.

Gus had seemed okay at dinner and had joined in the conversations, had talked to both his grandmothers and had also replied to things Justin or he had said, so he doubted that Gus was as angry as Luke was, but still, the silence between them in the car was driving Brian to the edge.

He sighed deeply, before he threw a quick glance towards his son. “Gus,” he started, but then didn’t really know what to say. He knew there were a lot of things he should say, but he wasn’t sure if Gus would be interested in hearing any of them.

“I am not angry, Dad,” Gus replied quietly, turning his head from the window towards his father, somehow sensing what was on his mind.

“You would have every right to be,” Brian said quietly, once again focussing on the road before him. For some reason it seemed easier to talk if he didn’t have to look at his son’s eyes. At least that way he wouldn’t have to see the pain and disappointment in them. Both feelings he had caused his son to feel.

“Not really,” Gus shook his head. “What happened mostly affected you, Papa and Luke. It didn’t really affect me that much.”

“Justin was out of your life as well… because of…,” Brian started, but was then interrupted by Gus.

“Because of what Lindsay did. Not because of what you did. After you guys broke up… he still came to Canada to see me. He still stayed in contact. The decision to not stay in my life wasn’t made by him.”

“She couldn’t have lied to him if I hadn’t lied to him first,” Brian said quietly, knowing that it was the truth. If he hadn’t broken up with Justin and had ended all contact, if he hadn’t kept his pregnancy a secret, Lindsay could have never lied to him and told him that he didn’t want him to see Gus any longer.

“Maybe, but… that was a decision she made. Your decision… it was only the catalyst for decisions she made subsequently.”

“I am not sure I agree,” Brian muttered, but left it at that. He saw his part in Lindsay’s scheme a bit differently to how Gus obviously saw it.

“I am not really surprised,” Gus stated matter of factly. “I thought about it for a long time last night and yes, you were the one to make the decision to keep Luke’s pregnancy a secret, but… you are not responsible for what everyone else did with that information and I think that’s something Papa saw as well. You are not responsible for how Grandma Jen and Grandma Debbie reacted to your pregnancy, you are not responsible for how my mothers reacted. Every single one of them made their own choices after you made your choice. And they all could have done the right thing, but no one did. That’s not on you, that’s on them.”

“I didn’t give them much choice,” Brian said truthfully.

“Everyone has a choice. You always taught us that. Everyone can do the right thing if they want to.”

A heavy silence settled between them that Brian broke after a few minutes. “You didn’t seem angry at dinner. If this is what you really think, shouldn’t you have been angry with your grandmothers?”

Gus shrugged. “I guess, but…,” Gus sighed, “What’s the point now? It all happened so long ago and things have changed so much by now. We have been a family for years now, you and Papa got married, everyone got on well for so many years. What’s the point in getting angry now about something that doesn’t really have an effect on my life anymore?”

“Just because it happened long ago doesn’t mean you can’t be angry about it,” Brian said, once again looking at his son. “And it can still have an effect after all these years.”

“But it doesn’t on my life,” Gus said quietly. “When you had Luke and everything with my mothers happened… I guess it would have been nice to have Papa around then as well, if only for additional support, but… you were there. You loved me, you took care of me, you were always there for me and the moment Papa came back into our lives, so was he. I don’t want to focus on a time when I was unhappy, when all of us were unhappy, when we’ve been happy for so long. I want to remember the good times, not dwell on the bad times.”

Brian couldn’t help but chuckle slightly, even though they were in the midst of a very serious conversation. “You are so much like Sunshine… sometimes it’s amazing to think that you’re my biological son and not his.”

Gus actually smiled at that. “It just shows what a big impact he has had on my life.”

“Yeah,” Brian said, now smiling gently. “And I am glad for it. You are a great man, Gus. You have no idea how proud we are of you.”

“Dad, Papa told me about…about your parents and your childhood,” Gus started, seeing how his father tensed immediately at the mention of his parents.

“I know, he mentioned it,” Brian just replied shortly, not offering anything else.

“Why didn’t you ever tell me?” Gus asked, now turning towards his father and looking at him from curious eyes.

“Because it didn’t matter.”

“I think it did,” Gus said quietly. “I never had any idea and… knowing how you grew up, what your life was like… It only makes me more grateful for my childhood.”

“I’ve never asked for anyone’s pity,” Brian muttered, his voice having an edge to it.

“It’s not about pity, Dad,” Gus gave back right away. “I think it’s something to be proud of.”

“Proud?” Brian snorted.

“Yes, proud,” Gus confirmed. “To know what your childhood was like and to know how hard you worked to escape that family. To know how much it affected you for so many years and how you overcame all of that for me, Luke and Vicky… How much you changed your life so we would never have to experience anything like that. I think that’s an incredible achievement.”

“You really sound too much like your Papa for your own good,” Brian harrumphed.

“Only because he’s right and you don’t know how to take a compliment,” Gus hit the nail on the head. “But I think it’s something to be proud of,” Gus turned to look out his window again, watching the scenery pass by before he continued, “I never had to wonder if I was loved. I never had to wonder what loving parents were like because… the moment there was a danger of me experiencing even the slightest pain, you stepped up and stepped in. You were there when my moms were too focused on themselves and forgot about me… You fought for me, you took me in and the same for Luke. Papa told me about your life before he left for New York… And I've always heard things... I know you were anything but a family man back then, but you became one for Luke. For both of us. I don’t think many people could have done that.”

“You two needed a father, not an over the hill club boy,” Brian said, still focussing on the road ahead.

“Yeah, but not many people could have changed like that without ever blaming us for what they had to give up,” Gus said reasonably. “Did you ever regret it?”

“What?” Brian asked. “Focussing on you and Luke?”

“Yeah,” Gus said quietly. “Giving up your old life… for us…”

“Not for a single second,” Brian said honestly, his voice absolutely sincere when he spoke. “And it wasn’t so much giving up my old life than really growing up. Something that was long overdue anyway.”

“I think it’s a great accomplishment,” Gus said quietly. “I know that I couldn’t have asked for a better father to be by my side and to love and support me.”

“It’s not like you have many fathers to compare to,” Brian muttered.

“I have two and I have seen my friends with their fathers and I know how lucky I have been to have you and Papa love me the way both of you did.”

Brian didn’t say anything to that, not quite sure how to reply to what Gus had just said.

“I know I wasn’t ever supposed to be raised by you, but by my mothers and… I can’t be sad about how things have turned out,” Gus continued when Brian had stayed quiet. “I wouldn’t be where I am today if it hadn’t been for you and Papa and the way you both loved me and supported me. So, yeah… you made a mistake in the past. I can’t say I really understand your reasons, but… I thought about it for a long time last night and I don’t have to understand them… Papa did and if he could forgive you, I guess I can too. All that matters to me is that you were always there for me when I needed you and that you were always honest with me. Talking to Papa last night, I remembered how much you had already told me about what had happened back then. How much both of you already tried to explain things to me and Luke back then and… that matters more to me than something that happened fifteen years ago. What matters to me is that you love me, that I never had to doubt if you and Papa loved me and that you both gave me a happy childhood and always supported me and made all my dreams possible.”

“Gus,” Brian said, his voice very emotional. “You deserve all the happiness you can get.”

“And you always made sure that I was happy. I won’t forget that, Dad. I love you. I loved you then and I love you now. I won’t lie and say I wasn’t hurt by what you told us yesterday, but… I won’t allow it to destroy our relationship. I love you and Papa too much for that to ever happen.”

Brian nodded, turning to look at Gus from glassy eyes. “I love you, too. More than you’ll ever know.”

They stayed quiet for the last ten minutes of their ride to the airport, but this time it was a comfortable silence between father and son. When they arrived at the airport, Brian parked the car and got out with Gus. He was surprised when Gus immediately came around the car and engulfed him in a hug.

“I love you, Dad!”

Brian hugged his son back and held him close. After a few minutes they pulled apart and nodded at each other. They would be okay. At the end of the day Gus loved him and Justin too much to be angry about something that had happened so long ago and that they had already paid for so heavily in their own ways.

They headed into the terminal building and Brian went as far with Gus as he could before they had to say goodbye.

They hugged once more, before Gus pulled away. “Please keep me updated on the situation with Melanie. If she does something... I want to know.”

Brian nodded. “I promise. We'll keep you in the loop.”

“Thanks, Dad! I'll message you guys when I get to my place and tell Vicky that I will call her in a couple of days.”

“She will like that. She misses you a lot when you're in New York. And now with Luke gone as well...,” Brian started, but then didn't continue.

Gus knew what his father was saying anyway though and nodded. “I know. I talked to him earlier,” Gus started and saw how his father's eyes widened in surprise at that statement. “I went to see him before I met with Jenny and... he's angry, but... I think he just needs a bit more time. He doesn't really remember what it was like when Papa came back from New York and... I think hearing the truth just shook his world a bit too much to just ignore and... I think once he looks at it with a clear head, he'll be more open to talking to you guys.”

Brian nodded, but didn't say anything else. He wasn't really sure what else there was to say.

“He loves you and Papa and I don't think he can stay mad at you for long,” Gus added, looking at his father from sincere eyes.

“He has a right to be angry,” Brian said after clearing his throat. “I wish he wasn't, but... he has every right to be and we will be here to talk to him whenever he's ready. We'll give him all the time that he needs.”

“Will you and Papa be okay?” Gus asked, raising an eyebrow in concern.

Brian shook his head in amazement. “You should be angry with us, not worrying about us,” he said, but then turned more serious and met his son's concerned gaze. “We're good,” he then said. “I can't say I like that this is once again causing trouble in our lives, but we knew we had to tell you the truth sooner or later and he and I... we've been through this before. We know how to deal with it. We're okay, you don't have to worry. If your Papa and I were able to work through it when it happened 15 years ago, we're also able to work through the memory of it now.”

“That's good,” Gus said. “I want you guys to be okay.”

“We are. We'll weather this storm just like we've weathered so many others before. We'll be fine,” Brian assured, pulling his son close once more. “Don't worry about us and concentrate on your studies.”

Now it was Gus' turn to shake his head in amusement. That had been such a Dad thing to say. “I will. I promise.”

They then said goodbye for good and Brian headed back to the car and back to Britin as Gus waited for his plane to take him to New York.

***

“How did it go?” Justin asked as he saw Brian come over and settle down on the sofa next to him. He had been watching some tv show or other, not really paying much attention as he had also been sketching at the same time.

“We're good,” Brian said, as he leaned closer to Justin and looked at the sketch he was working on. “He's been more understanding than I would have been. He didn't get that from me, that's for sure.”

Justin smiled as he handed Brian his sketchpad, noticing the way he was looking at the sketch and was trying to see what Justin had been working on.

“He's a good man. And he got that from you. You raised him to be a good man just like yourself,” Justin whispered as he saw Brian take in the sketch of Vicky in her bed, sleeping peacefully that he had been working on.

“Is that from earlier?” Brian asked as he nodded at the sketch, for now not replying to Justin's comment, but diverting the attention away towards the sketch.

Justin nodded as a smile spread on his face. “She fell asleep on the way back. She was already half asleep when we left mom's house and by the time we got here, I barely managed to get her to wake up enough to change into her pyjamas and brush her teeth. She was back to sleep five minutes later. She didn't even have time to miss your story.”

“She'll get one tomorrow,” Brian promised, before he put the sketchpad on the living-room table and turned towards his husband with a smile. “I could be persuaded to tell you a story tonight though...”

“Could you? Hmmmm, I wonder what story that would be...”

“The tale of King Brian of Babylon and his handsome prince Justin... it's a favourite of hers...You might like it as well,” Brian winked, leaning over and capturing Justin's lips in a kiss.

“King Brian, huh? If I remember correctly I was the king of Babylon, not you,” Justin snorted before returning the kiss and intensifying it. He slid down on the sofa and lay on his back, pulling Brian down with him.

“Artistic freedom,” Brian muttered as he leaned over Justin, looking into his blue eyes which were quickly turning dark with passion.

“And I thought I was also the artist in the family,” Justin huffed in mock annoyance, looking at Brian with a grin on his face.

“Not when it comes to bedtime stories,” Brian winked, running his hand through Justin's hair.

“Hmmm, I am really curious now and would love to hear the tale of King Brian and his prince. If Vicky loves it, I guess it must be a good one.”

Brian leaned in and kissed Justin once more, this time claiming his lips hungrily. When they pulled apart breathlessly, Brian muttered. “Oh, you're going to love it, trust me.”

Their lips then met again in another hungry kiss, before Brian's hands slowly started to move down Justin's chest, past his bellybutton and down to his crotch.

It took them almost an hour before they both were ready to continue the story of King Brian of Babylon and his prince Justin. This time they actually finished it in bed, like you would any good bedtime story and much as Brian had predicted, Justin seemed to have loved the story if his happy sighs and blissful moans were anything to go by.

Chapter 22

Over the course of the next week the Kinney-Taylor family settled into a new rhythm. With both Gus and Luke gone, Vicky was now the only child in the house and while she loved having her fathers all to herself, it was also obvious how much she missed Luke and Gus, but especially Luke. Luke would usually still have been around even with Gus gone, but now with him gone as well, Vicky had a hard time adapting to the new atmosphere in the house.

As had been planned, she spent Monday after school with Luke, visiting him at Emmett's place and spending some time with her brother there. Both Brian and Justin had been glad that Luke had agreed to spending time with Vicky and that he wouldn't make her suffer any more than was necessary.

On Tuesday, Brian and Justin had taken Vicky bowling and had helped her improve her bowling skills just like they had promised her on the weekend. Afterwards, they had all called Gus and chatted to him for a while, updating him on all the new things Vicky had learned from her fathers.

Wednesday had been a quiet evening at Britin which Brian, Justin and Vicky had spent putting up some more Christmas decorations.

As they soon realised, it had been the calm before the storm, only that they couldn't have known that when they went to bed that night.

Thursday had started pretty much the same as previous days, with Brian and Justin having breakfast with Vicky and Brian then taking her to school before he headed into Pittsburgh to Kinnetik. Justin would pick up Vicky later after school and take her to Emmett's house, so she could spend some more time with Luke.

The rest of the day, Justin had planned to spend painting and with some calls. He had a call scheduled in the morning with his agent and another one later that day with a journalist for an art magazine that wanted to run a story about his upcoming show in their next issue.

Justin had just gotten off the call with his agent, when the doorbell rang. He frowned, not really expecting anyone. When he opened the door, he frowned even more. The well-dressed man standing outside his door looked unfamiliar to Justin, but he seemed to know Justin. At least he addressed him correctly.

“Mr. Taylor?” He asked Justin for confirmation.

“Kinney-Taylor,” Justin automatically corrected, still looking confused when he saw that the man was holding a manila envelope in his hands. He definitely looked too well-dressed for a courier or delivery man. “How can I help you?”

The man handed the envelope to Justin and Justin took it from him, feeling even more confused.

“You have been served,” he said, before he turned around and got back into his car. He then drove off and left Britin.

“What the fuck?” Justin just muttered as he looked at the car that was disappearing down their drive, then at the envelope in his hand.

He went back inside the house and settled at the kitchen table with the envelope. Once he opened it and started reading the papers inside, he started fuming and immediately grabbed his phone. He pressed 1 on his speed dial and waited for Brian to answer the call which he did only a couple of seconds later.

“Hey, what's going on? I thought you had a call...,” but he never got any further because Justin interrupted him right away.

“I just got served,” was all he said.

“You what?” Brian frowned, not sure he understood what Justin was talking about.

“By Melanie. She has sued us for child endangerment and contributing to the delinquency of a minor. She asked for an emergency hearing and it has been granted. We need to be in court tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Brian frowned, surprised at the speed this was moving. “Are you sure?”

“Yeah, I learned how to read,” Justin replied testily, then took a deep breath. “Sorry, I am just... I don't know...shocked...”

“Take a deep breath,” Brian said calmly, trying to keep a grip on the situation and trying to calm Justin down. “Who has she sued exactly?”

“Both of us, but these particular papers are only in my name. I guess you'll have an unexpected visitor soon serving yours...”

“Okay... let me call Debbie and Carl and check with them if they have received anything as well. We'll then set up a meeting with the lawyer. Anything else in the papers?”

“She asked that Jenny be returned into her custody immediately as her safety is in danger while she is in our care. There are mentions of alcohol use, drug use, frequent partying and varying sex partners...”

“Does she really think this will work? She tried the same with Gus and it didn't work back then... why would it work now?” Brian muttered angrily when he heard what Justin had said. Melanie had tried to paint his character in a bad light in Gus' custody trial 15 years ago and it hadn't worked back then. Now, 15 years later their lives had changed even more and they were even less like the people they had been back in the days. “So she doesn't even seem to know that Jenny is no longer staying with us either.”

“I don't think so. It only mentions you and me,” Justin replied after checking the papers once more.

“Can you come into town, Sunshine? I think you should be here for the meeting with the lawyer,” Brian said quietly, knowing that Justin had other plans for the day.

“Yeah, I can head out right away,” Justin said. “I'll just have to reschedule that call with the journalist.”

“Okay,” Brian sighed, taking a deep breath. “Meet me at the office, okay? I'll call Debbie and check in with her, Carl and Jenny.”

“Okay,” Justin agreed, nodding even though Brian couldn't see it. “Brian... do you think things will be okay? I mean... what do we do if... what if the judge agrees with her?”

“Sunshine, he won't. She doesn't even seem to know where her daughter is living at the moment. What does that tell you about her as a mother? She hasn't even tried calling Jenny or us in 10 days. If she was so worried about Jenny's well-being, why would she have waited so long to take action? She's contradicting herself and... those claims by her... it's just the same old shit she always throws at us...It didn't work with Gus, it won't work now,” Brian replied calmly, trying to calm his husband down. He could hear how worried Justin was and he could understand that well. They all needed to keep a calm head though and needed to trust their lawyer. He was sure that things would work out well then.

“Okay,” Justin said once more, sounding slightly more convinced. “I'll just reschedule the interview and will head into town then.”

“Drive carefully,” Brian said automatically, before his voice softened some more. “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” Justin replied, then hung up.

Ten minutes later he was out the door and on his way to Kinnetik.

***

“Sunshine,” Brian said as he saw Justin come into his office, immediately getting up from his chair and walking over to his side. He took him into a hug and held him close. “Are you okay?”

Justin exhaled as he was held by Brian, then nodded. “Yeah... I guess I just got really nervous when I read those papers...”

“You were right, I got my own delivery shortly after you called,” Brian said, then pulled Justin over to his desk and showed him his own documents.

“We'll meet with Debbie, Carl, Jenny and the lawyer in the afternoon. So far Debbie and Carl haven't heard anything. It doesn't seem like Melanie knows that Jenny is living with them now.”

Justin nodded. “How are they? How is Jenny?”

“Debbie was nervous, but Carl seemed pretty calm all things considering. He also seems to think that she doesn't have a chance in hell to get custody of Jenny...”

“She's Jenny's mother,” Justin pointed out as he settled into Brian's lap and allowed him to run a hand over his backside.

“But she isn't a good mother. And Jenny will attest to that. Debbie and Carl will talk to her about what this means and will bring her to the meeting later.”

Justin nodded, resting his head on Brian's shoulder. “Have you told Gus yet?”

Brian shook his head. “Not yet... It will only upset him and I think we should call him after we've spoken to the lawyer and know more.”

“Okay,” Justin agreed, knowing that Brian was right. “God, I am so nervous...,” Justin admitted, as he looked up to meet Brian's concerned gaze. “I just want this to be over with.”

“It will be over soon,” Brian promised, still running his hand over Justin's back in a soothing motion.

“Did you feel like this with Gus?” Justin asked quietly, leaning into Brian's touch.

“It's not really the same situation, is it?” Brian wondered out loud. “Back then she wouldn't let me see him and I was the one that took her to court, but... yeah, I guess I was nervous and worried as well.”

“You seem pretty calm now,” Justin said, almost sounding impressed.

“Because I know that she doesn't have a chance in hell of getting custody for Jenny. I trust that any judge will agree that she is a total failure as a mother,” Brian replied seriously.

“I hope you're right,” Justin whispered, before he rested his head back against Brian's shoulder.

They stayed like that for a couple more minutes, before Brian got Justin to agree to some light lunch. Justin claimed that he wasn't really hungry, but didn't put up much of a fight when Brian pointed out that they needed to eat something. In the end they headed towards the diner and had some light soup there, before they headed downtown to meet with the lawyer.

***

“Okay, is everyone clear on what we're going to do tomorrow?” Their lawyer asked as the meeting was coming to an end.

Everyone around the table nodded.

They had just spent the better part of an hour going over their action plan for the hearing the next day and everyone felt way calmer now than they had when the meeting had started. Especially Jenny seemed a lot calmer now after the lawyer had assured her that everything would be fine and that her mother didn't have a case, especially seeing how she had subpoenaed Brian and Justin, but not Debbie and Carl who Jenny was actually staying with.

He had explained to them how the obvious mistake Melanie had made in not finding out where her daughter actually was and who she was staying with would work in their favour just like her continued silence since her visit to Britin would when they tried to convince the judge that Melanie was anything but a worried mother. He had also pointed out how the fact that Melanie was using the same arguments she had already used in Gus' custody trial was also playing in their favour as those claims had already been proven incorrect back then and hadn't become any truer since then.

“Is there anything else we should be prepared for? Anything she can throw at us coming out of left field?” He asked, looking at everyone around the table. While Debbie, Carl and Jenny shook their heads, Brian and Justin met gazes, then nodded slightly at each other.

It was Brian who spoke. “Our son, Luke, has recently moved out of our house. I doubt that she would know anything about that if she doesn't even seem to know where Jenny is staying, but...”

“How old is he?” The lawyer asked, immediately making notes.

“15,” Brian said and he could see understanding dawn on the lawyer's face. He hadn't moved out to start a job or move into an apartment on his own, there was obviously more to the story. “He is staying with a friend of ours for the time being.”

“May I ask what's the reason for him moving out?”

“An argument about a private family matter,” was all Brian replied, his eyes making it clear that he'd rather not explain in any more detail.

“Any claims of child endangerment or domestic violence?” The lawyer asked, his voice very matter of factly.

“Now wait a goddamn minute,” Debbie started, but was stopped by Carl who shook his head at her. Being a police man, he knew as well as Brian that the lawyer had to ask these questions.

“No,” Brian said calmly. “Nothing like that. A disagreement of opinions on a private family matter. We know where he is staying, we trust the friend that he is staying with, we know that he is still regularly attending his classes, he is still in contact with his siblings...”

The lawyer nodded. “Okay... Do you think there is any chance that he would move back in? If only to avoid any surprises at the hearing?”

“No,” was all Brian said.

“Brian, maybe... if we explained to him... I am sure he would do it for Jenny,” Justin said quietly, but stopped when he saw Brian shake his head.

“No, Sunshine,” Brian shook his head once more. “He doesn't want to speak to us at the moment and that's his decision and we have to accept that. We will accept that. We will not force him to come home if he's not ready to be back home. If Melanie wants to use this against us, so be it. I doubt it would really make a difference. Debbie and Carl are the ones taking care of Jenny, not you and me, so any issues we have with our son shouldn't be of concern here.” Brian then turned towards the lawyer. “I only let you know so there wouldn't be any surprises. If Melanie knows, we'll deal with it, but I won't force Luke to come home before he's ready.”

The lawyer nodded and everyone else stayed quiet. They had all heard the emotions in Brian's voice and knew that he was serious. He wouldn't force Luke to do anything he wasn't ready for, no matter how much it might help their case. This was about Luke's feelings and Brian would respect those.

“Okay,” the lawyer then said, “I think that should be it for now. I'll see you tomorrow at the courthouse.”

Everyone nodded, then said their goodbyes.

In the parking garage, Brian and Justin said goodbye to Debbie, Carl and Jenny, promising them that they would call Gus and update him on the day's events.

They then headed back to Kinnetik where they called Gus.

Gus insisted that he wanted to be in court the next day and wanted to be by Jenny's side to support her. At first Brian and Justin hadn't really been happy about that, but in the end they knew that Gus was old enough to make his own decisions and really, they could understand why Gus would want to be there as well. After all this was about his sister and the woman who had once claimed to be his mother as well, so in the end Brian and Justin gave in and agreed for Gus to also be there.

Brian booked him an early morning flight for the next day, so that Gus would arrive in Pittsburgh with plenty of time to make it to court.

After their call with Gus had ended, Brian tried to get some more work done while Justin decided to spend the rest of his afternoon doing some Christmas shopping. He promised to pick up Vicky from Emmett's place, where he would also update Emmett on the day's events. He had a feeling that Jenny would talk to Luke herself, but in any case, Emmett could give Luke the update in case he was interested as well. They then agreed to meet back at Britin in time for dinner.

Chapter 23

“Mr Kinney-Taylor, can you tell us how long Jenny has been staying at your house?”

“A couple of days, less than a week. She came to stay with us the Monday before Thanksgiving and left to stay with her grandparents the Sunday of the same week,” Justin replied calmly.

The hearing had started about ten minutes ago and their lawyer had called Brian as the first witness. He had asked some quick questions confirming that Jenny wasn't currently staying with them and also debunking some of the claims Melanie had made against them concerning the varying sex partners, alcohol and drug use.

Now it was Justin's turn.

“And you have informed Mrs Marcus of her daughter's whereabouts?”

“We tried to,” Justin started, his voice taking on an angry note. “We tried calling her several times, we sent her messages, but none of the messages got any reply, so on the Tuesday, I booked a flight and flew to Tampa, where Mrs. Marcus lives and tried to meet her in person to make her aware of Jenny's current whereabouts.”

“Were you successful?” The lawyer asked next.

“It took until Wednesday before I could reach Mrs Marcus and speak to her directly. Several more messages to her private phone as well as her office had been ignored by that time.”

“What was her reaction when she found out that Jenny was staying with you?”

Justin took a deep breath before he answered. “It was obvious that she hadn't been aware that Jenny had been gone for several days by that point. She claimed to me that Jenny was staying with her at her home. When I pointed out that Jenny had been staying with me and my husband and our family for the last two days, she seemed more concerned about me and my husband than the welfare of her daughter.”

“Why would you say that?”

“She seemed more interested in discussing my private life and the relationship I have with my husband than the fact that her daughter had run away from her care and that she didn't even seem aware of it and that she had ignored the many, many messages we had sent to her concerning her daughter.”

“Did she give you a reason why she hadn't responded to any of your messages?”

Justin nodded. “Yes, she said that she was working on a very important case and that her secretary knew better than to disturb her for anything.”

The lawyer nodded. “Did she make any comments about Jenny's situation to you before you left?”

“Yes, she told me that she wanted us to send Jenny back to her immediately. That she expected us to send Jenny back home on the next flight.”

“And what was your reaction to that?”

Justin sighed. “I refused and told her that I expected her to come and pick Jenny up. Jenny is underage and I didn't want her to get on a plane on her own. Mrs Marcus only responded that Jenny had been old enough to make her way to Pittsburgh on her own, so she would be old enough to make her way back on her own as well and that she had a very important case coming up and didn't have the time to come and get her herself.”

“Did Mrs Marcus come and get Jenny?”

“She showed up at our family home on the Saturday after Thanksgiving, so three days later.”

“What happened then?”

Justin's voice was full of anger when he spoke. “Mrs Marcus came to our home and made claims about me and my husband, claims that hurt our son and Jenny a lot and caused a lot of pain for everyone in my family.”

“Did she take Jenny home with her?”

“No, Jenny refused to go home with her and claimed that she wanted to stay with her family in Pittsburgh. Mrs Marcus left in the end and we didn't hear back from her until we got served yesterday.”

“So she hasn't been in contact in the last 12 days?” The lawyer asked for clarification.

“No, she hasn't contacted any of us at all.”

“Is Jenny still staying with you and your family?”

Justin shook his head. “No, Jenny has moved in with her grandparents a day after Mrs. Marcus' visit to our home. We all decided together that it would be best for her to be closer to her biological family.”

“Mr Kinney-Taylor, Mrs Marcus claims that you are endangering Jenny by using alcohol and drugs on a frequent basis and by having varying sexual partners in your house. Can you respond to those claims?”

Justin nodded, trying very hard not to get personal as he replied. “Mrs Marcus hasn't been involved in my life or my husband's life in the last 14 years. She doesn't know anything about our lives and her claims are completely unfounded. They are the same claims she made in a custody suit for our son Gus 14 years ago and those claims were already debunked then. Neither me nor my husband take drugs, we don't drink apart from an occasional drink for dinner every once in a while and we have never had any sexual partners in our house. Our house is our family home, a home where we are raising our three children together and any claims to the contrary are wrong and defamatory.”

“Thank you, Mr Kinney-Taylor, that is all for now.”

Once his lawyer had finished with his questions, it was Melanie's turn to ask him questions. For this case she was her own legal counsel and it was clear that she hadn't really expected that their lawyer would call them as witnesses for this custody case which was surprising since she had named them personally in her case. When she had asked Brian some questions earlier, it had been clear that she had tried to provoke him and had been sorely disappointed when Brian hadn't risen to the bait. Justin hoped that he could stay as calm as Brian had.

“Mr Kinney-Taylor,” Melanie started, sneering the Kinney part of his last name. “You claim that there are no sexual partners at your home and that you don't drink and don't take drugs,” she started.

“Correct,” Justin nodded.

“When is the last time you were drunk?” She asked him. “And remember, you are under oath.”

“That would have been more than 7 years ago,” Justin replied calmly, clearly remembering the day he had found out that he couldn't carry children.

“And you haven't drunk since then?”

“That's not what I said,” Justin said, his voice taking on an edge. “I said we have occasional drinks for dinner, but generally speaking, I try to stay sober. I was attacked a long time ago and have suffered a brain injury as a result. Drinking too much sometimes causes me headaches and I prefer to avoid them if I can.”

“And your husband?”

“I think he has already answered this question himself. As his answer was truthful, I have nothing more to add.”

“You claim there are no varying sex partners at your house. When was the last time you have had sex with someone not your husband?” Melanie asked, looking at Justin like a tiger that was ready to strike.

“Objection! Relevance!” Their lawyer immediately yelled, but Justin was already smirking at her, ready to answer her.

“Almost ten and a half years ago.”

That answer seemed to honestly shock Melanie enough for her to not even hear the judge as he agreed with their lawyer concerning the objection.

“Mrs Marcus, please stay on the matter of this case,” the judge said, his voice sounding slightly frustrated.

“No further questions,” she muttered, looking at Justin angrily before she went back to her desk.

Justin was then allowed to return to his place by Brian's side, who immediately wrapped his arm around Justin's shoulders and held him close. When Justin leaned into the hug, Brian left a kiss on his forehead.

“Well done, Sunshine.”

Next it was Gus' turn. Gus had arrived in Pittsburgh earlier that day and when they had arrived at the courthouse, he had talked to the lawyer and had insisted that he wanted to testify as well to the fact that Melanie was a bad mother. He had been the cause of her previous custody case and he better than anyone could account for her shortcomings as a mother.

Brian and Justin hadn't been quite sure if Gus testifying was a good idea, but Gus had insisted and their lawyer had agreed that it could only help their case.

“Gus, may I call you Gus?”

Gus nodded. “Sure, yeah. Mr Kinney-Taylor is my father... well, both of my fathers,” he chuckled, before he turned more serious again.

“Gus, can you tell the court why you insisted on giving your testimony today?”

“Yes...,” Gus took a deep breath before he continued. “I don't want Jenny to have to go back to her under any circumstances.”

“And by her you mean Mrs Marcus, her mother,” the lawyer clarified.

“Yes,” Gus agreed.

“Why not, Gus?”

“She also used to be my mother once and I know better than anyone that she doesn't really care about Jenny... or me...”

“Objection! Speculation!” Melanie cried out.

“Please bear with us, your honour. I promise I will get to the point on this quickly,” their lawyer said and the judge nodded, much to Melanie's frustration.

“You better,” he warned, then waved with his hand for Gus to continue.

“Can you explain to us why you would say that, Gus?” The lawyer asked.

“I used to live with Mrs Marcus, my biological mother Mrs Peterson and Jenny when I was younger. My father had visitation until my biological mother committed a crime and was sentenced to a long prison sentence. After my mother went to prison, Mrs Marcus broke the custody agreement that was in place with my father and stopped him from seeing me. At the time she told me that it was my father who didn't want to see me and she claimed that my father was too busy taking care of my brother who had just been a little baby at the time. My father took her to court, fighting for custody and in the end was granted sole custody of me.”

“What happened then?” Their lawyer asked, already knowing the answer.

“Mrs Marcus abandoned me,” was all Gus said in a clear voice.

“Objection! Hearsay!” Melanie interjected which only made Gus snort derisively.

“Hearsay? Really? I experienced everything first hand. I know how Dad came to pick me up and how you didn't even say goodbye to me. How you didn't allow me to say goodbye to Jenny. You left Jenny at a friend's house and then left me with Dad and Uncle Ted. And afterwards you left Toronto and we never heard from you again. You never called, you never wrote, you never asked anyone how I was doing,” Gus answered Melanie directly, looking straight at her.

“You abandoned me and that's not hearsay, I know because I was the child that was abandoned by you. And just so you know, it's the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Gus took a deep breath before he went on, this time a lot calmer.

“My dad loved me and was always there for me, not like you, who always complained about how much work Jenny and I were, how much money we cost, how much food, clothes and care we needed. All I remember from staying with you and mom are the arguments about money and how much work it was to take care of Jenny and me. Coming to stay with my Dad, away from you, is the best thing that has ever happened to me. He loved me, he never blamed me for what my mom did and neither did anyone in my family. I was surrounded by love and never had to feel bad for having the same needs as any other child. And I want the same for Jenny. I want her to know what it feels like to be loved by a family, what it feels like to have someone in your corner that cares about you, loves you and will always support you. I always thought that you would treat her better than you have treated me because she was your biological daughter, but... judging by things, you didn't. You should be ashamed of yourself! Playing the worried mother when you couldn't even be bothered to ask how she was doing in nearly two weeks because that case of yours was more important.”

Gus had talked himself into a rage and their lawyer knew that it was time to get him out of there.

“No further questions, your honour.”

The judge nodded, then turned to Melanie. “Mrs Marcus? Your witness.”

“Gus, how old were you when your father got custody of you?”

“Six years,” Gus replied, still trying to calm down from his earlier outburst.

“How much does a six year old know about custody cases and what's going on between adults?” Melanie asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Enough to realise what it means when your mother never calls you, never comes to visit and doesn't care if you're dead or alive.”

“How do you know that I haven't tried to keep in touch with you? How do you know that your father didn't stop me from getting in contact with you?”

Gus snorted, making it clear what he thought of that line of argument. “My father has never lied to me. He would have told me the truth and would have let me make the decision if I wanted to see you or not.”

“Yeah, the holy Brian Kinney... haven't we all heard that before,” Melanie rolled her eyes.

“Objection!” Their lawyer interrupted, but once again didn't get any further as Gus was already answering her.

“At least he was always honest with me and respected that my well-being was more important than his personal feelings about you. I know that my dad hired a private investigator to try and find you and Jenny after you left Toronto. Can you prove any real attempt that you made to get in contact with me?” Gus challenged, meeting her gaze head on.

When no reply came from Melanie, he just nodded to himself. “Yeah, I thought so.”

“No more questions, your honour,” Melanie just said, then turned around and went back to her desk without another glance at Gus.

“Your honour,” Gus said, as he got up and ready to leave the witness stand. “I hope that you will see that Jenny has a loving family here in Pittsburgh that has welcomed her with open arms and would like nothing more than for her to stay. After years of being neglected by her mother, don't you agree that she deserves someone to take care of her for a change?”

Before anyone could reply, Gus left the witness stand and returned to his seat next to Jenny, who gave him a hug as he sat down. His fathers clapped his shoulders in support and Gus knew that while he hadn't strictly followed their lawyer's instructions, he had at least gotten to say his piece concerning the well-being of his sister.

Next Jenny was called to the witness stand and their lawyer asked her a few quick questions to establish a timeline of when she had left her home in Tampa and had headed to Pittsburgh.

“Why did you make your way to Pittsburgh of all places, Jenny?”

“I had found some documents in the attic that pointed me in the direction of my brother, Gus. Until I had found the documents, I wasn't aware that I had any family besides my mother. She had never told me anything and for as long as I can think it has only ever been her and me, so... when I found evidence that I had a brother, I wanted to meet him.”

“Why didn't you tell your mother and ask for her permission?”

“She wouldn't have let me go, I think and in any case, she wasn't around much, so there wasn't really any chance to speak to her.”

“Clearly your mother must have been around sometimes, to make dinner, to talk about your school,” the lawyer asked, looking at Jenny.

“My mother was never really the maternal type. Her career always came first and for years I have been left to take care of myself. She would usually leave some money at the beginning of the week, but then it could be that she would be working into the middle of the night and sometimes I wouldn't see her for days on end.”

“Your mother didn't make sure that you would have food on the table, that you would attend school, that you would be home on time?”

“No,” Jenny shook her head. “She always claimed that she was too busy at work to really take care of me and I was pretty much left to my own devices since I've been old enough to do so. And before she would always complain how much work it was to take care of me. So... when I found out about having a brother, I didn't think she would even notice that I was gone, which apparently she didn't...”

“Jenny, did it ever bother you that your mother didn't take better care of you?”

Jenny shrugged. “I am used to it. It's been like this for as long as I can remember and it's really all I've ever known. I never grew up with a mother that would cook for me, bake for me or with me... it's just not an experience I ever had because her work was always more important.”

“Jenny, may I ask why you never complained to authorities about her lack of care?”

“I was doing okay and I have heard about the foster care system and what happens to children once they are in the system. I was scared that it would be even worse if I went and complained... She left me money, I had food and was safe, I was a good student... As for her lack of care: you can't miss what you never had, you know? I was used to taking care of myself.”

Their lawyer nodded sadly. “Jenny, can you tell us how you would like this day to end?”

“I would like to be allowed to stay with my grandparents and my family here in Pittsburgh. I've only been here for 2 1/2 weeks, but I already love them and know that they care about me. Just look at how many people are here and have come today to support me,” she said, pointing towards everyone that had come to court to be there in support of her. Her grandparents, Brian and Justin, Ted and Blake, Emmett and Drew, Grandma Jen and her brother Gus. “Everybody has been so nice and welcoming to me and everyone has taken such good care of me. I have found out so many things about myself, my family, where I come from that I had no idea about and I'd really like to explore that some more and get to know my family better. Now... now that I know what it feels like to have someone care about you, I don't want to give that up and go back to my old life with my mother.” Jenny turned to the judge and looked at him pleadingly. “Please, don't make me go back to Florida. I really want to stay here with my grandparents and get to know my family better.”

“No more questions, your honour,” their lawyer ended on that note.

The judge nodded. “Your witness, Mrs Marcus.”

“JR, what about school?”

“You know I hate that name. Please call me Jenny like everyone else does,” Jenny said, looking at her mother from blazing eyes. It was obvious that they had had this discussion before.

“JR, which is the name that has been given to you by me, your mother, what about school? Please answer the question.”

Jenny shook her head at her mother, but then replied. “I am currently keeping up to date with all the homework from my school being sent to me and everyone has been really helpful supporting me and my school work. I'd love to start to go to school here and we have already looked into schools close to Grandma Deb's house. If I can stay here, I can be enrolled in a school starting next week.”

“What about your friends back home?”

Jenny snorted. “What friends?”

“Your friends at school,” Melanie insisted.

“I haven't had any close friends in years, mom... You would know that if you had paid attention or had ever asked. I never fit into that school you sent me to... I am not like those other girls that only care about their beach bodies and boys, but nothing fundamental like climate change or equal rights. I have never fit in there.”

Melanie seemed slightly taken aback by that statement, but tried to hide her surprise. “And you have friends here in Pittsburgh?”

Jenny nodded. “And a family. Mom, I am happy here. I want to stay here. You and I both know that you care more about your career than you care about me. Why are you insisting on me coming back? You never cared before whether I was there or not... Please let me stay here. I am happy here.”

“You are my daughter and you will stay with me,” was all Melanie said to that, before she returned to her desk. “No further questions.”

After Jenny was excused from the witness stand, there were quick interrogations of Debbie and Carl during which their ability to raise Jenny was discussed.

Their lawyer made sure to point out that Debbie hadn't only raised a child on her own, but had also been a surrogate mother to Brian, Justin and so many others on Liberty Avenue. No, she wasn't perfect and no one claimed that, but she had learned a thing or two since raising her own son and would love to take care of her granddaughter.

Melanie seemed almost eager to point out that her son had ended up a criminal and in prison, which had only made Debbie point out that Melanie couldn't have been bothered too much by Michael's shortcomings as she had still chosen him to be her daughter's father.

During Carl's testimony his history with the Pittsburgh PD was established and they also talked about his relationship to his own children and grandchildren.

Melanie didn't have much to ask Carl, knowing that it would be hard to say something against a highly decorated detective of the Pittsburgh PD without coming off as petty.

In the end their lawyer gave his final statement.

“Your honour, we have heard many statements today talking about what would be best for Jennifer Rebecca Marcus. But most importantly we have heard from her herself and her brother. They have both made it clear that Mrs Marcus is anything but a concerned mother. When Jenny ran away, she was aware that her mother most likely wouldn't notice as she was so busy with work. And Jenny was right. Mr Kinney-Taylor and his husband tried to get in contact with her and left her more than 40 messages without a single reply. In the end Mr Kinney-Taylor had to fly to Florida himself to make Mrs Marcus aware of her daughter's disappearance which three days later she still hadn't noticed. And even then Mrs Marcus couldn't be bothered to come to see her daughter for three more days. If she had really been that concerned about her daughter's well-being and the men she was staying with, why did she wait three days? Because her work was more important! As it has always been according to Jenny's own testimony.

When Jenny refused to return home with her, Mrs Marcus didn't immediately file her case for this emergency hearing, she waited 12 days before she filed the papers. In the meantime she didn't contact her daughter once. She didn't contact the Kinney-Taylors, she didn't contact Jenny's grandparents. She also didn't contact the authorities. I ask you, you honour, does that sound like a concerned mother that's worried about the people her daughter is staying with to you?

If this was my daughter, I would have done something the first day I had found out where she was. I would have done something the moment she refused to return home to me. I wouldn't have waited for 12 days and left her in the care of people I consider dangerous for her well-being for 12 days.

I am sorry, your honour, but I don't buy this concerned mother act.

We have heard from Gus Kinney-Taylor how he has been abandoned by Mrs Marcus as a small child. We have heard from Jennifer Rebecca Marcus how her mother has abandoned her to her own care for years now. I have sworn affidavits from Mrs Marcus' old law firm confirming that even during her pregnancy with Jenny she continued working even though her doctors had clearly advised her against it and had warned her of the dangers to her unborn child. Even back then Mrs Marcus cared more about her job than the well-being of her child, establishing a long history of neglect and wrong priorities.

I am sorry, your honour, Mrs. Marcus might be a lot of things, but a concerned mother is not one of them.

I strongly believe that it is in Jenny's best interest to be allowed to stay with her family here in Pittsburgh. She herself has expressed that wish, her family is willing to take her in and take care of her and I think it will be better for her further development to be surrounded by a loving family that will take care of her than being returned to a mother that has only left her to her own devices so far.

Your honour, please allow Jenny to stay with the family that loves her and wants to take care of her.”

With that the lawyer ended and sat down again.

Melanie's final statement was basically just about her being Jenny's biological mother and as such she should be granted custody of her daughter. She tried to point out that the Pittsburgh family hated her and had an agenda against her and that no fair testimony could be expected from any of them. Therefore their testimonies should be ignored and Jenny should be returned to her care.

Once the final statements were done, the judge excused himself and announced that he would be back to give his final decision in an hour.

Melanie pretty much stormed out of the room before anyone could even think of saying something to her which pretty much left the Pittsburgh family on their own.

Everyone decided to head out for a quick coffee break before they had to be back at the courthouse in less than an hour.

There was a sense of nervousness in the air when they all returned, waiting for the judge to give his final decision.

The judge returned a couple of minutes after they had all taken their seats again and got ready to announce his decision.

“Cases like this one always sadden me immensely. In a perfect world every child should grow up in a loving home, surrounded by a loving family, but, alas, this is not a perfect world and unfortunately, more often than not I am faced with the decision of what will be the best to do for a child in regards to their development and their future.

What saddens me even more, is that in this case we're not talking about a small child, but about a young woman, a teenager, who has already been neglected for years. She has now found out that she has a family, a family that is willing to love her and care for her the way she should have always been cared for her whole life.

I have listened to all sides and most importantly I have listened to what Jenny wishes. She is already old enough to voice her opinion and she did so very clearly. She made it very clear that she wants to stay here with her newfound family and does not wish to be returned to her mother's care. Or lack thereof.

It always pains me to separate a family, but in this case, I have to admit that I have a hard time believing the tale of the concerned mother as well.”

The judge turned to Melanie and looked at her directly. “Mrs Marcus, you claim that you are concerned about your daughter's well-being while in the care of her family here in Pittsburgh, yet you yourself have not noticed her absence for three days and have not responded to any messages informing you of that absence. Afterwards it took you three more days to show up at a place that you think is a danger to your daughter's well-being...

After you left, you didn't get in contact with her or anyone taking care of her for another 12 days. I find that very hard to believe from someone who claims to be so concerned for her daughter's well-being.

So more than anything, your own actions make me doubt your seriousness in your efforts to get custody of your daughter and to take care of her.

I have therefore decided that Mrs Deborah Novotny and Mr Carl Horvath will be granted temporary custody of Jennifer Rebecca Marcus. This decision will stand for the next 30 days and we will reconvene in 30 days to see if anything might have changed in the meantime.

I want Jenny to be enrolled in a school for the duration of her stay here in Pittsburgh and would like a progress report from her new school at our next hearing in 30 days.”

The judge then banged his gavel and ended the hearing.

Everyone immediately fell into each other's arms and there were a lot of relieved hugs and kisses being shared. Especially Jenny and Debbie seemed more than relieved and didn't stop hugging for several minutes.

It was Brian, who noticed that Melanie had already disappeared from the room when he let go of Justin and turned to give Gus a hug as well.

“Where did she go?” He asked, looking around for Melanie, having expected her to at least talk to her daughter.

“Licking her wounds, I'd say” Ted said quietly, clapping Brian's shoulder in congratulations. “Let me go. You stay here with everyone.”

Brian nodded, then turned back to Gus again and hugged him as well.

Ted left the room and went in search of Melanie, finding her at the end of the corridor.

“Melanie, wait!”

“What do you want?” Melanie asked, the anger easy to hear in her voice.

“Aren't you going to speak to Jenny?” Ted asked, looking at her with a frown on his face.

“She has made it very clear that there is nothing to say.”

“She is your daughter,” Ted said quietly.

“Not anymore... Holy God Kinney has won once again,” she spat.

“Brian had nothing to do with this. She hasn't even been staying with him and Justin for almost two weeks...”

“Of course he had nothing to do with this... He didn't pay for that lawyer... he didn't allow her to stay here... no, of course he had nothing to do with anything. Just as always.”

“Melanie, why are you always blaming Brian for everything? You neglected your daughter for years... you never told her about her family... how is that Brian's fault?” Ted shook his head in disbelief.

“I hope he is happy. Now he has taken both my children away from me,” she spat, then angrily stormed off.

Ted just looked after her, shaking his head in disbelief.

He then returned to the courtroom where everyone was getting ready to leave. When Brian met his eyes, he just shook his head. Brian nodded, but didn't say anything else. Not for the moment.

For now everyone was happy and deserved that happiness. The time to react to Melanie's disappearance would come later. Now was a time to celebrate.

“How about we head to Papagano's for a celebration? I think this calls for a celebratory dinner,” Brian announced instead, looking at everyone who was gathered in the room.

Everyone smiled and nodded, only too happy to accept an invitation to dinner from Brian.

“I... I would love to, but...,” Jenny started, looking around unsurely. “I promised Luke that we could meet after the hearing was over and... I promised to update him.”

Brian could see how uncomfortable she felt bringing up Luke and it made him feel bad. He knew that she was aware of what had happened, probably having heard all the dirty details from Gus and Luke and he could only imagine how uncomfortable his invitation must have made her.

“Of course... yeah... you should go ahead and meet with him,” he nodded, allowing Justin to wrap his arms around his waist. Of course Justin had immediately noticed his emotions over her announcement and was now there to silently support him.

“I... I mean, I would really love to, but I don't want to cancel on him and... I don't think he would feel very comfortable to join...”

“No, of course not,” Justin said quietly, nodding at her “We understand, Jenny. You go ahead and meet with Luke.”

Jenny looked from one man to the other, then to Gus. “Are you sure? I mean... you did so much for me and I don't want to seem ungrateful.”

“No, it's fine, Jenny. Go and meet with Luke,” Justin said once more, smiling at her. “You deserve to celebrate in the way you want to. There'll be more chances for other dinners now that you're going to stay here.”

She nodded, then looked at everyone who was still gathered in the room. “You should go ahead though. I know how nervous everyone was and how much you have all cared about me and my well-being. You should go ahead and enjoy a dinner. You have all more than deserved it.”

“I think she's right,” Gus then announced, smirking at his fathers. “We should still go ahead and celebrate. This is still good news for everyone and I know that grandma, grandpa and I definitely feel like celebrating.”

“Too right we do,” Debbie agreed, smiling at everyone around. “Personally, I haven't been happier in years. I am so relieved that Jenny gets to stay with us and gets to celebrate Christmas with us... I could burst.”

“Well, we better not let that happen. Papagano's it is then. Just let me make a call to reserve a table,” Brian announced, heading out of the room.

He came back a couple of minutes later. “Okay, we have a table in two hours. Everyone get yourselves ready, we have something to celebrate,” he said, pulling his son and husband close and holding both of them tight.

Everyone agreed happily and then left the courthouse to get ready for their celebratory dinner.

Brian and Justin headed off to pick up Vicky from her friend that she had gone home with after school, Gus went with Debbie and Carl and Jen to spend some time with his grandparents and Jenny went with Emmett to see Luke. Ted and Blake headed to Kinnetik for a quick stop there to see that everything was alright and everyone agreed to meet in two hours at Papagano's for their celebratory dinner.

Chapter 24

“Your dads were amazing, you know? You should have seen the way they replied to her questions. So calm, but so full of anger, showing her in the way they replied what they thought of her,” Jenny said for what felt like the tenth time to Luke.

“Look, can we please not talk about my fathers?” He grumbled, taking a slice of the pizza they had ordered earlier.

“Luke,” Jenny started, looking at him intently. “Don't you think that you're being too harsh on them?”

“Too harsh?” Luke snorted. “They lied to me, they betrayed me and my dad cost me five years with my Papa... I don't think being angry at them and not wanting to constantly hear about how great they are is too harsh.”

“It's just that your dads are really great and it's obvious how much they love you,” Jenny said quietly.

“Yeah, so great. Just like everyone else in this family. They're all liars, the bunch of them. Welcome to our lying, backstabbing family. You must be so happy to have found us,” Luke snapped, dropping the piece of pizza back in the box, his appetite suddenly gone.

“I am happy,” Jenny said quietly. “I have never had a family before and I have one now...”

“You should have hoped for a better one,” Luke muttered.

“Damn, Luke! Everyone is out having a celebratory dinner together to celebrate that I can stay here and I cancelled that to spend time with you and all you can do is shit on my happiness.”

“Well, you're the one that's going on and on about how great all of them are,” Luke snapped, looking at Jenny angrily.

“Because I think they are. No, I don't know them as well as you do, but so far everyone has been nothing but nice and supportive of me. Especially your dads. They paid for our lawyer, they let me stay at your place those first few days, they paid for Gus to fly in last weekend and today... all for me.”

“So what, they spent a lot of money. Go them!” Luke rolled his eyes, but refused to meet Jenny's gaze.

“Why are you so angry with them?” Jenny asked quietly, looking at Luke closely.

“Because they lied. All of them... my parents, my grandparents, my uncles, everyone...”

“And you have never lied in your life?” Jenny raised an eyebrow dubiously.

“Not about something this big that impacted other peoples lives.”

“Fair enough,” Jenny muttered, not quite ready yet to let go. “So they lied. About something that happened 15 years ago when you were a baby and ended ten years ago when you were five. Why make such a big deal about it now?”

“What? Excuse me?” Luke shook his head in disbelief. “My dad cost me and my papa five years together and I don't have a right to be angry about that? I don't have a right to be angry that my papa just forgave dad without a single care in the world for how that would make me feel?”

“That was between them, Luke. And they worked it out. And from what Gus told me, he didn't just forgive your dad. Gus mentioned that it took months for them to get back together and even longer for them to really move on. He said they went to therapy together to work through what had happened.”

“So that makes it all okay?” Luke asked in disbelief.

“I just don't get why you are making such a big deal about it now...,” Jenny said quietly. “It's obvious that both your fathers love you so much and from everything I have heard of them and seen of them, I would say they always did... You had a happy childhood, didn't you?”

“Yes, but...,” Luke admitted grudgingly, but never got any further to make the point he was about to make.

“But you have no idea how lucky you are that you had two parents that love you more than anything, that you have two parents that were always there for you when you needed them, that you had two parents who always made you and your siblings their priority... you have no idea how lucky you have been!” Jenny's voice had risen and it was easy to hear how agitated she was. “Take it from someone who never had that: You were damn lucky! So, instead of complaining about something you can hardly even remember, why don't you thank your lucky stars for having given you these amazing parents?”

“And I should just forget that my papa never got to feed me when I was a baby, never got to hold me or sing me to sleep, never got to change my diapers... wasn't there when I was born... I should just forget about all of that?” Luke was fuming now and icy blue eyes glared at Jenny.

“What difference does it make to your life?” Jenny just asked, shaking her head.

“Excuse me?”

“No, I mean, if you think about it... what difference would it have made if your papa would have been there to do all those things. You were a baby, you wouldn't have remembered anyway and... your dad did all those things. From everything I have heard, he always took great care of you, didn't he?”

“So that makes it okay?”

“No, but... maybe it would put some things into perspective. You had a father that loved you, that pretty much changed his life for you and Gus and took care of you both in an amazing way... you have never been abandoned by a parent... you have never been left to your own devices, to take care of yourself... you have never been blamed for costing too much money, for taking up too much time... Do you have any idea how lucky you are?”

“Oh, so now I should just forgive my dad for being a colossal asshole because he didn't abandon me like your mom did with you? Did with Gus?”

Jenny got up, angrily slamming her hands on the table. “You know what? Forget it! You have no idea how lucky you have been. You have no idea what it feels like to ask yourself why your parents don't love you and don't care about you... instead you are here bitching and moaning about the fact that your fathers did all they could to give you a happy childhood. What would you have had your papa do? Hate your dad for the rest of his life? Yeah... I am sure you would have had an equally great childhood then with them both fighting all the time about how to raise you and who gets to see you when and for how long... You wouldn't have your sister then... did you ever think about that? You love Vicky, but if your father hadn't forgiven your dad... I doubt they would have ever had her, would they? You go on and on about things you can't even remember because you were just a baby when really... have you ever asked yourself how your father feels about not having been there when you were born? Have you ever asked yourself what it feels like to him to know that he never changed your diapers, that he never saw your first steps or heard your first word? Can you imagine how that must have hurt him? And still he was able to forgive your dad because he loved him and ... I would bet because he also loved you and wanted you to grow up happily. All you do is complain, but have you ever thought how much it has cost your father to forgive your dad? How much it must have cost your dad to know that he caused so much pain and hurt to the people he loved most... And yet they worked through all of that and grew into a strong family, giving you and Gus a happy home and childhood. You need to get some perspective, Luke,” Jenny ended, before she turned away from the table and headed for the door.

“Jenny,” Luke called after her. “Where are you going?”

She stopped for a second and turned around to glare at him. “Where I should have been to begin with. To celebrate with my family. A family that loves me and cares about me... a family that also loves you and cares about you. If only you could get your head out of your own ass long enough to see it.”

She went to open the door, then turned around one more time for one final parting shot. “I lost my mother today... She left without even saying a single word to me and I have no illusions about her getting in contact anytime soon... But you... you have two fathers that love you more than anything, even now. You should have seen the way your Dad defended you moving out to the lawyer... the way both your dads told me to cancel the dinner with the whole family to go and spend time with you... They love you so much if only you could see it.”

“The lawyer?” Luke frowned. “What does the lawyer have to do with anything?”

Jenny sighed. “Your fathers told the lawyer that you had moved out in case my mom had found out somehow and planned to use it against them, against us... The lawyer asked them if there was any chance that you could move back into their house for the hearing, just to avoid giving her any ammunition against our case and your Dad told him that he would not ask you to move back in. That you were angry, had a right to be angry and that they respected your feelings and would not force you to do anything you weren't ready to do. Everyone could hear the pain in his voice as he said it, but I know that he meant every word. Even now your dad loves you so much and respects you and your feelings so much... You have no idea how lucky you are!”

With that Jenny turned around and left Emmett's house for good, leaving a wide-eyed Luke behind.

***

“Jenny! You came!” Vicky exclaimed when she saw Jenny make her way over to their table. They had just finished their main courses and were ready to order dessert.

“Hey Vicky,” Jenny said, forcing herself to smile at the happy girl that was greeting her with open arms. She happily went into those arms and hugged the girl back.

“I am so happy you can stay with us,” Vicky said seriously as she pulled back and looked at Jenny.

“So am I,” Jenny nodded, then shyly waved at everyone at the table. “Hi, everyone.”

“What are you doing here? I thought you would be with Luke?” Gus asked with a frown as he looked at his sister. It was Justin who put a hand on his arm and shook his head, indicating that Gus shouldn't ask any more questions.

It had been obvious to Justin that something was wrong. He had seen the tension in Jenny the moment she had arrived at their table and he wasn't sure, but it almost looked as if she had been crying not too long ago.

Gus took the hint and immediately went on, before Jenny could answer. “Well, it's good you are here now. We were just about to order dessert.”

“Dessert sounds perfect,” Jenny said quietly as she sat down in a chair next to her brother that Brian had just organised for her. She looked at him gratefully. “Thanks.”

“You're welcome,” he said, eying her curiously, before he went back to his own seat between Justin and Vicky.

He shared a look with Justin and they both nodded slightly. Something had happened, they just weren't sure what and now was not the time to find out what exactly had happened.

Most other people around the table didn't seem to have noticed that something was wrong and the happy atmosphere soon engulfed Jenny as well. Within minutes she was laughing as well and was glad that she had decided to join her new family for this dinner after all.

Once everyone was done with dessert and ready to start going home, Brian discreetly left the table to go and pay for everything.

He was surprised when Jenny joined him a minute later.

“I am sorry for just showing up like that. I should have called first to see if it was alright,” she said quietly, hanging her head.

“Don't be ridiculous,” Brian waved away her concerns, looking at her curiously. “This dinner was in your honour, so you had every right to be here.”

“Yeah, but I said I wouldn't and then...”

“You changed your mind,” Brian shrugged. “It happens. All we needed was another chair. No harm done.”

“Thanks,” Jenny said quietly, still not looking at him.

“Jenny, is everything okay?” He asked, his voice full of concern. “When you came here... you looked like you'd been crying...did something happen? With Luke?”

She shrugged. “We had a fight...”

“Oh,” Brian said, not quite sure how to react to that.

When Jenny finally looked up and met his gaze, he understood what they had been fighting about.

“Oooh,” he said, this time running a hand over his face. “Jenny, I am sorry you got pulled into our mess...”

“It's my own fault,” she said. “I shouldn't have said anything, but... I just couldn't keep my mouth shut.”

“If you need to talk about it,” Brian started unsurely, but then didn't quite know how to continue. He really didn't feel comfortable talking to Jenny about her fight with Luke which had clearly been about him. He was so out of his league. Where was Justin when he needed him? He would know what to say to her.

“I just want you to know that I think you and Justin are amazing fathers and Luke is a fool not to see that...”

“Jenny,” Brian started, looking at her sadly. “Luke is angry with us for a good reason...”

“He has two fathers who love him and he has no idea how lucky that makes him... who cares what happened ten, fifteen years ago?” She said, her eyes once again blazing with anger.

“It's not that easy,” Brian said slowly, giving her shoulder a gentle squeeze. “He's hurt because we lied to him...”

“Yeah, but... he's so angry with Justin for forgiving you and I don't think he ever thought about what the alternative would have been. I mean... what if you guys hadn't worked through it and... what would his childhood have been like then? He acts like he has no idea how lucky he is...”

“Jenny,” Brian looked at her from sad eyes. “He doesn't know...He was so young when everything happened and afterwards... Luke has always had two parents around that loved him and took care of him. He doesn't know what it's like not to be loved,” he said quietly, meeting her gaze head-on. “We can't blame him for that.”

“But...,” Jenny started, only to be stopped by Brian, who looked at her sadly.

“I know why it makes you angry. Especially in light of what happened today. I get it, Jenny, I do, but... Luke is lucky enough to never have been in your situation... in Gus' situation... in my situation... in Justin's situation. He has no idea what it feels like to be rejected by a parent and we can't blame him for that.”

“It's just... he made me so angry when he would go on and on about how bad this family is when he knows that they're the only family I have...,” she whispered, tears now running down her cheeks.

Brian took her hand and pulled her closer, wiping away the tears from her face. “Well, those are the Taylor genes in him... He got that from Justin... They can both be quite infuriating at times,” Brian joked, trying to lighten the mood a bit. “It's just a very complicated situation for him and everyone involved and I am sorry it ruined your day, today of all days...”

Jenny nodded, surprising Brian when she hugged him.

“Thank you! For everything you've done for me. I am very grateful and... I am grateful for the family I've found here,” she whispered into the embrace.

Brian hugged her back, not quite sure what else to do.

“And we are glad you're here with us and here to stay with us... Just give Luke a bit of time...”

She nodded, then pulled back from the embrace and wiped her tears from her face. “Sorry for laying this on you when... I know that it must be hard for you as well...”

“Hey, no apologies needed. That's the good thing about family. They can't run from you when you feel bad... they have to stay and listen to you, no matter what.” He winked to show her that he had mostly been joking.

Thankfully she seemed to have gotten that and smiled in return. “Thanks!”

She then excused herself to go to the restroom to clean up and Brian returned to the table where Justin was already waiting for him with a questioning gaze when he returned to his seat.

“She had a fight with Luke...,” was all he said quietly and while Justin looked concerned, he only nodded, knowing that this was not the time and place to discuss that fight between Jenny and their son.

Jenny returned a minute later and everyone got ready to leave the restaurant.

Outside in the parking lot, everyone hugged some more and said goodbye, agreeing to meet again on Sunday for their weekly family dinner which would take place at Britin this week.

Gus and Jenny made plans for the following day and much to Vicky's delight included her and promised her that she could come along when they met for lunch and maybe a movie afterwards.

While everyone else was talking and saying goodbye, Brian quietly drew Emmett to the side. “Jenny and Luke had a fight earlier. That's why she came here after all,” he said quietly, not surprised when Emmett immeditaly looked concerned.

“Oh my, are they both okay?”

Brian shrugged. “Jenny was hurt by Luke's comments about the family which of course are our fault because he's angry with us and... well, apparently they fought about us as well...”

“They seemed to get on so well,” Emmett said quietly. “She came by a couple of times last week and Luke always seemed happier afterwards.”

“Would you mind checking that he's okay when you get home? I just... I don't feel comfortable knowing that he's all alone while everyone else was at dinner together and... I know that Sunhine worries...”

“Of course,” Emmett immediately nodded. “I'll make sure he's okay the minute I get home.”

“Thanks, Honeycutt!” Brian said, his voice serious, conveying that he was really thankful for Emmett's help. “Thanks for everything.”

“Don't call me, Honeycutt,” Emmett replied automatically, before looking at Brian closely. “And you don't have to thank me. You know I love him and want him to be okay.”

Brian nodded, knowing that indeed. Emmett loved all their children and had always been a great uncle to all of them, not just Vicky who was his goddaughter.

“If you could just give us a call later on? I know it would calm Justin down,” Brian said and Emmett nodded, not replying anything else, but knowing full well that it wouldn't only calm Justin down, but Brian as well.

It was obvious how much Brian cared about his son and his well-being and how much it hurt him that he couldn't check on Luke himself right now. Emmett could see it on the older man's face as clear as day. Brian was hurting from the whole situation but was trying to hide it as well as he could.

Brian clapped his shoulder in thanks, then moved away and returned back to the group where everyone was finally getting cold and ready to get into their cars to head to their warm homes.

“Emmett will call us later,” was all he said to Justin before he got into the car where Gus and Vicky were already waiting.

Justin met Brian's gaze with a concerned one of his own, clearly having seen that Brian had been talking to Emmett and knowing what they had talked about. He nodded back at Brian, then got into the car himself.

Two minutes later they were on their way home to Britin.

Chapter 25

“Luke? We're back,” Emmett called into the quiet house as he and Drew arrived home. When he didn't get a reply back, he frowned at his partner. “I think I should check on him.”

Drew nodded and watched as Emmett headed up the stairs towards their guest room where Luke had been staying for the last week.

Emmett knocked on the door. “Luke, honey? It's me. Can I come in?”

He was relieved when he got an affirmative reply a couple of seconds later. He slowly opened the door and made his way into the room, not surprised when he found Luke sitting at his desk, looking at some video or other on his laptop.

“How was dinner?” Luke asked, his voice making it clear that he was only asking to be polite but didn't really care one way or another.

“It was nice,” Emmett said quietly, sitting down on the edge of the bed and looking at the teenager in concern. “We missed you.”

“Yeah, I am sure,” Luke scoffed, turning back towards his laptop once more.

“Everyone missed you, honey.”

“Well, I don't miss them,” Luke gave back, not looking up from the video he was watching.

“We were surprised when Jenny showed up,” Emmett said next. “I thought you two had plans.”

“Plans change,” Luke just muttered, not giving Emmett anything more.

“Honey, I know that you two had a fight,” Emmett said quietly, looking at Luke in concern. “Are you okay?”

“Did she tell you?” Luke turned around and looked at Emmett from angry eyes.

“No, your Dad did,” Emmett replied truthfully.

“My Dad?” Luke frowned, then shook his head slowly. “Of course she would have told him...”

“Honey, your Dad was really worried about you and frankly, so am I.”

“Why? Because Jenny and I had a fight? People fight. It happens...”

“I know that you fought about the whole situation with your fathers and... with everyone at dinner and you here all alone... it's hard not to worry,” Emmett said quietly.

“I am fine,” Luke just replied, then turned back to his laptop.

“I don't think you are,” Emmett said, not ready to let Luke finish their conversation yet. “I know that you miss everyone and to be the only one missing out on dinner with the whole family... that must have hurt you.”

“I am the one that decided not to come,” Luke spat. “Why would I be hurt by my own decision?”

“Because you love everyone who went to that dinner and I am sure you would have liked to be part of the celebrations. I know that you must be happy for Jenny that she can stay here in Pittsburgh with all of us.”

“I don't love them... they are all liars and assholes. I am pretty sure I made it clear how I feel about my dads especially,” Luke replied angrily, before he pressed play on his video once more.

“Luke, I know that you say that, but deep down you love all of them.”

“No, I don't....”

“I think you do, honey. You always have and you haven't stopped just because you're angry with them. Why do you think you're so hurt by finding out the truth? Because you love them. If you didn't love them so much, you wouldn't be so hurt right now,” Emmett said quietly.

“Maybe being hurt made me stop loving them,” Luke argued, not looking at Emmett, but trying to focus on the screen in front of him.

“You haven't stopped loving them just like none of them have stopped loving you.”

“Well, they can take their love and...,” Luke started, but didn't get any further because Emmett interrupted him.

“Luke, what is your plan?” Emmett asked, looking at him intently.

“My plan?” Luke frowned, obviously surprised by Emmett's question.

“Yes, honey. Your plan.”

“I don't know what you mean,” Luke admitted, pausing the video though and turning to look at Emmett in confusion. “What plan?”

“Your plan for this situation,” Emmett clarified. “Are you never going to talk to your fathers again? Are you going to ignore your grandparents and everyone else for the rest of your life? Have you thought about what that would mean for your relationships with Vicky and Gus who both love their family?”

“I...,” Luke started, but then didn't go on.

“You haven't thought that far ahead?” Emmett asked, then nodded. “Well, honey, I have and I have to say that the options you're faced with don't really look all that appealing to me. Just look at tonight. Your whole family was celebrating together and you were here on your own, being angry at all of them. Is that what you want for Christmas? Your birthday? Vicky's birthday? Your graduation? Gus' wedding one day? Your own wedding one day? Do you want to be on the outside on your own while everyone else is together?”

“So what, are you saying I should forgive my dads so I don't end up alone? That's a pretty shitty reason for forgiving someone,” Luke muttered.

“Yes, it is and yet it is one of the few reasons your papa had when he was faced with the same choice so many years ago,” Emmett said quietly.

“What?”

“What do you think your father felt like when he found out the truth? What do you think the situation was like for him, honey?” Emmett said, his voice incredibly sad. “When he came back from New York, when he found out about your existence... he was all alone on the outside, looking in on a happy family, a strong family unit, a loving family. Your dad, Ted and Blake, your grandparents, you and Gus... one happy family and he was the one on the outside on his own, hurting and in pain.”

“And because he forgave all of them, I should just do the same?” Luke asked, his eyes wide.

“No, I am not saying that. I am just saying that you should think about all your options before you make any decisions. I know that at the moment none of the options sound too appealing to you, but... maybe getting some perspective would help a bit to better judge these options.”

“Some perspective?” Luke frowned. “What perspective?”

“Maybe your Papa's perspective to begin with,” Emmett said quietly, looking at Luke intently. “Have you asked him why he forgave your dad? Have you asked him what made him come back and try to build a family with your dad? After all he was the one that was hurt the most by what happened back then.”

“He was hurt the most? What about me? What about me getting hurt?” Luke exclaimed angrily, glaring at Emmett.

“Oh, I am sure you're hurt, but were you really hurt by your Dad's actions back in the day?” Emmett asked carefully.

“Of course! I lost five years with my Papa because of his lies and betrayal.”

“Correct me if I am wrong, but you were only a baby then, Luke. A toddler later. Most of the time your father was in New York, you probably can't even remember and don't have any memories of... and the memories you have from that time he was in New York... are they unhappy memories? Were you an unhappy child? Because that's not what I have been told.”

“And that makes it all okay? I was small, I was taken care of by my Dad... all of that makes it okay?”

“No, it doesn't,” Emmett admitted, “but maybe it gives some perspective, because while you are in pain now and are hurting now because of that lie, your father has been hurting every day since he came back from New York. Honey, ask yourself how much it hurts him to know that he didn't get to see your first steps, that he didn't get to take you to bed at night and most importantly, that he wasn't there when you were born... While you are hurting now, he has been living with that pain for 15 years.”

“And yet he forgave my Dad,” Luke spat.

“Yes, and isn't that amazing?” Emmett wondered loudly. “He must really love you and your Dad to be able to move on from something as horrible as what your Dad did...”

“Yeah, he loves my Dad alright... That had nothing to do with me. He loves my Dad and he loves him enough not to care about me.”

“Oh honey, you couldn't be more wrong,” Emmett said. “I know for a fact that you are the reason he started to forgive your Dad. It wasn't because he loved your Dad. It was because of you and what would be best for you.”

“Best for me?”

“Honey, has your Papa explained to you why he forgave your Dad?” Emmett asked with genuine curiousity. “Have you asked him?”

“He said because he loved him,” Luke said as if to prove his own point.

“Hmmm, I am not surprised he would have said that,” Emmett nodded, then looked at Luke intently. “Let me tell you something, okay?”

When Luke didn't respond, but nodded, Emmett went on.

“I saw your Papa the day he found out the truth about you. And Luke... I have never seen a human being in that much pain. He was so hurt, so broken... He was in so much pain and he was angry. You have no idea how angry he was at your Dad, your grandparents, everyone really... I felt so bad for him and I saw him be angry for weeks while he got to spend more time with you and got to know you. The anger was almost eating him up and he was trying so hard to hide it from you. Do you know why?”

When Luke shook his head, Emmett answered quietly.

“Because he knew how much you loved your Dad. He could see how much you loved him, adored him and how happy you were. How well your Dad had raised you in his absence. He didn't want you to see his anger at your Dad because he didn't want to destroy the relationship you had with your Dad. I guess... if it had been me in his shoes, I wouldn't have cared about your Dad and I doubt that he did at that point, but he cared about you. He loved you so much that he didn't want to take any of your happiness away. He knew that your Dad had raised you well, had taken great care of you and that you loved and adored him. And I am sure that wasn't easy for him to accept, but he didn't only accept it, he encouraged it. Do you know that your Dad wanted your Papa to sign a custody agreement and your Papa said no?”

Luke shook his head and his reply was quiet when he spoke. “No.”

“Yeah, when your Papa came back to Pittsburgh and found out the truth, your Dad offered him shared custody of you. He wanted to allow Justin access to you and wanted to assure him with the custody agreement that he would always have access to you, but your Papa didn't sign it. He said they didn't need it.”

“Why? That seems stupid after years of being lied to and having been betrayed by Dad...”

“Yeah, I thought the same at the time and I told him quite clearly that I thought he was making a mistake, but you know? He didn't think so... He just calmly exclaimed to me that this wasn't about him and his access to you, but that this was about what would be best for you and a custody agreement that would pull you away from your Dad... the only parent you had known for five years, pulling you away from him in favour of spending half your time away from him, away from Gus, away from your grandparents and everyone you loved, so you could spend time with a man you didn't even know in person... he didn't think that was best for you. This was a day after he found out the truth and already then all he cared about was you. Instead he suggested that he would come to Britin, would see you at home, where your room was, your toys were... where you felt comfortable. He wanted to make his appearance in your life as easy for you as it could be. He wanted you to get used to him, to get to know him, but to do so in a surrounding you would feel comfortable with. Honey, he could have taken your Dad to court and could have gotten more than shared custody, but he would have never done so because it wouldn't have been in your best interest to be pulled out of the only home you had known, away from the only family you knew.”

“I remember how he used to pick me up from school and would spend the afternoons at home with me... playing with me... preparing dinner and then he would stay until it was time for me to go to bed,” Luke said quietly, clearly thinking back to that time.

“Yes, he did... He came to your home every day and spent time with you in what was your family home, but...do you know how hard that was for him?” Emmett asked, looking at Luke from sad eyes.

“Hard? Why? I thought he was happy to see me and that it was his choice,” Luke frowned.

“Yes, he was happy to see you, but... coming to Britin... it must have hurt him badly... Britin is the place your Dad bought for him to prove to him that he was serious about marrying him. Your Dad had bought Britin to show your father that he loved him and wanted to marry him. It's where he proposed to your Papa and... now your Papa had to come back to the house that held so many memories for him and had to see that your Dad had turned it into the family home that your Papa had always dreamed of. Only that he was not a part of that family... he was an outsider... because of your Dad's betrayal,” Emmett explained quietly. “Honey, I know you think your Papa just forgave your Dad, but... that's not true. There was a lot of anger, a lot of pain and that time... I have never seen a person in as much pain as your Papa was. The only thing that kept him going was you. You gave him the strength to come to that house every day, forgetting about the dreams and hopes he had had for that house, facing your Dad day in and out, facing the one person that had hurt him more than anyone else ever could, having to see how much you and Gus loved and adored that person when he was so anrgy with him... having to put on a happy face for your and Gus' sake when all he wanted to do was rip your Dad apart because he was so angry and hurt by his betrayal... But he never showed you any of that because he knew how much you loved your Dad and your family and he wanted you to always have that. He wanted you to always be happy and keep that happiness. It was all that mattered to him, even more so than his own happiness. As long as you were happy, he had the strength to keep going...”

“If that is true... why did he forgive my Dad? That doesn't sound like he loved him,” Luke argued and Emmett could only nod.

“Oh, at the time your Papa was hurt, angry and felt very betrayed. I don't think that he really ever stopped loving your Dad, but at that time... it was definitely buried under all that shit going on. As for why he forgave him... I think I am also to blame for that.”

“You?” Luke frowned as he looked at Emmett.

“Yes, honey. I remember talking to your Papa and he was telling me about how happy he was when he got to spend time with you, but how hard it was to be around your Dad. How angry he was, how much it hurt to see your Dad day in and out and how angry he was at everyone in the family and... I remember telling him that he and your Dad needed to do better than that for your and Gus' sake. That they needed to find a way to be around each other and be in each other's presence without it having a negative impact on you and Gus. I told him that he needed to find a way to forgive your dad for your sake and Gus' sake. Honey, have you ever thought what life would have been like if your fathers hadn't worked through this?”

Luke shook his head. “Not really, but... Jenny kind of said something like that... How my childhood would have been a very different one and how...how Vicky wouldn't exist.”

Emmett nodded sadly. “Yeah, she probably wouldn't and what a loss that would be for all of us,” Emmett said, thinking of his exuberant goddaughter. “But yeah, even just looking at your first couple of years with your Papa... If your Papa hadn't somehow been able to forgive your Dad, hadn't been able to forgive your grandparents... there would have been no Thanksgiving dinners at your house... there would have been no Christmas mornings under the tree at Britin... Either your Papa wouldn't have been there when you and the rest of the family celebrated these holidays or you would have been with your Papa, but it would have just been the two of you because he would have been angry with everyone else in the family... I don't know if it would have happened, but maybe your fathers would have started fighting about who got to spend what holiday with you and... maybe you would have noticed those fights... would have become aware of the tension between your Papa and everyone else you loved... It would have been very different from the childhood you had, I am sure. And your father didn't want that for you. He wanted you to be happy and have a happy childhood with all the people that you loved. And that's why he started to forgive them... slowly but surely he accepted that these people were a part of your life, that you loved them and that he needed to find a way to deal with them for your benefit. And he did... it didn't happen over night, it was a very slow process, but slowly but surely he started speaking to your Dad. They started talking about what had happened and why it had happened. He started to talk to your grandparents again and slowly started to build relationships with them. It still took a long time for him and your Dad to get back together and to get to a point where they could even admit to each other that they still loved each other. And after that it took even longer for them to figure out how to make a relationship work and how to move on from what had happened and yes, I am sure a lot of that had to do with your Papa loving your Dad, but... the very beginning, those very first steps of forgiveness and starting to mend things? Your Papa did that because of you... because he wanted what was best for you and because he wanted you to be happy...”

Luke nodded, clearly still trying to process everything that Emmett had said. After a couple of minutes he looked at Emmett and met his gaze. “Why did you forgive my Dad?”

“Me?” Emmett frowned at Luke.

“I know that you weren't part of what was going on. Papa said you had nothing to do with it and didn't know about me either... and I don't remember you being around before Papa came back from New York. He introduced you to me...So... something happened between you and my Dad as well, right?”

Emmett sighed, but then nodded. “Yes, something happened... but honey... it's been so long ago...”

“What happened?” Luke asked, clearly not ready to let Emmett get away with his non-answer.

“When your Dad broke off all contact with your Papa... I got very angry with him. Your Papa... he had always meant a lot to me. He was so young, but... so strong... I have always been impressed by his strength and the way he handled whatever life threw his way and quite frankly... I thought for a long time that he could do a lot better than your Dad.”

“Because they had an open relationship and Dad slept with other men?” Luke asked, looking at Emmett for confirmation.

Emmett nodded. “Yes. That was one of the reasons... Your Dad, he was a different man back then. You can't compare him to the man he's now. He was a lot colder, more distant, sometimes he was outright mean to the people around him and... it was obvious that your Papa really loved him and loved him enough to want a serious committment. Something your Dad would have never given him... So... yeah, I thought your Papa could do a lot better, could find someone who would love him the way he deserved. And then... the bomb went off at Babylon and your fathers got engaged. And for the first time, I could see what your Papa had told me many, many times before: That your Dad really loved him and was a very loving person inside. Your Papa had always told me that your Dad was different with him and that he knew he was loved by your Dad even though he never said the words... he always said that he knew that your Dad had the potential to be a great family man, but frankly, I couldn't see it... until they got engaged. Your Dad was different then. When I planned the wedding for them... your fathers seemed so in love, so in sync. And not just your Papa, but your Dad as well. For the first time I had no doubt that he loved your Papa. And then... when they cancelled the wedding and your Papa left for New York, I was as shocked as everyone else, only... that your Papa had assured me that it was okay. That this was what both of them wanted and had agreed and for the first few months they seemed fine indeed. Your Dad went to New York, your Papa came to Pittsburgh and they seemed as in love as they had been when the wedding had been on. So... when that changed from one day to the other and when your Dad just stopped talking to your Papa... your Papa was hurt. And I got very angry on his behalf. I confronted your Dad, called him out on his shitty behaviour towards your Papa and... in my anger... accused him of all the things he had ever done wrong towards your father in my opinion. I told him I didn't want to be friends with someone who could be so cruel to a friend of mine and... then I stormed out of his office and practically never spoke to him again for the next five years.”

“But you were friends with Ted, weren't you? And... you were part of the family as well...,” Luke seemed clearly confused by what Emmett had just said.

“Honey, there were a lot of things going on at the time. I had just started my business and was busy with that... Drewsie and I were just trying to figure out our relationship and what we wanted... Yes, I was friends with Ted and part of the family, but I pulled back more and more and after a while Ted was really the only one I was still in contact with.”

“And he lied to you?” Luke asked.

“Well, he didn't tell me the truth, that's for sure,” Emmett muttered. “And believe me, when I found out what had been going on and that he had been a part of it all... we didn't speak for a long time... just like I didn't speak to your Dad for a long time after your Papa came back... I was too angry with him for what he had done to your father.”

“But now you're friends,” Luke pointed out and Emmett nodded.

“Yes, we are. Your Dad is a very dear friend and honey, I know it's hard to understand, but the man that is my friend now... he's not the same man that was my friend so many years ago. Your Dad has changed a lot over the years, not the least because he had you. The Brian Kinney I knew and had ended being friends with... he was no father. At least not a full-time father. He was no committed partner who would prefer staying home with his kids to going out to the clubs and fucking some hot young guy,” Emmett stopped then, his hand flying to his mouth. “Sorry, I shouldn't have said that.”

“Don't worry, my dads told me what he was like...,” Luke said.

“Honey, your Dad was a completely different man and when your Papa came back and I was told the truth, I felt everything I had ever thought about him to be confirmed. And then...over time... your Papa started telling me what a great, dedicated father he was... how much he had changed... how different he was... and honestly? I couldn't believe it. I wouldn't have trusted him any further than I could have thrown him, but... your Papa did. He saw how much your father had changed and saw the new man he was and over time... when they moved in together... when they got back together... I started coming around to Britin more and saw more of your Dad myself and I saw the changes your Papa had talked about. I saw the Brian Kinney he had fallen in love with and the man he had been able to forgive. I saw the loving father that would have done anything for his children, I saw the loving partner that would move the moon and the stars for your Papa... I saw what your Papa saw and yes, that Brian Kinney... he became my friend and I wouldn't miss his friendship for anything in the world.”

Luke nodded slowly, still frowning when he spoke. “How can a person change so much? I mean... he's always been the same person, hasn't he?”

“Well, if your Papa is to be believed, your Dad has always been like this with him, but hasn't trusted himself or hasn't allowed himself to really become that person for fear of getting rejected and hurt... Apparently his parents did quite a number on him...”

Luke nodded, knowing about that part from his Papa who had told him. “Yeah, Papa told me...”

“And after he had you... after Gus came to live with him as well... It was just the three of you and I think in the security of those relationships with you and Gus, he allowed himself to be that person... that person who loved and wanted to be loved in return. I know your Papa told me once that your Dad also went to therapy to work through a lot of the issues his childhood caused for him, but... I think what really changed him and opened up his heart and soul were you and Gus. You two brought out the real Brian Kinney and allowed him to become the man your Papa always knew he could be. A man your Papa could forgive and love again, a man I could be friends with again...”

Luke nodded once more, taking in what Emmett had said. “Thanks for telling me all that.”

“Honey, you know you only have to ask... I know your Dads don't want there to be any secrets and want you to know the truth, so... if you have any questions... honey, just ask. You can ask me... and I know you can ask them.”

“Yeah,” Luke said quietly, then met Emmett's gaze once more. “Do you think... it would be okay for me to be on my own for a while? I... you've given me a lot to think about...”

“Of course, honey. But... if you need to talk... you know I am here, okay? You're not alone.”

“Yeah, thanks,” Luke said, before he watched Emmett get up from his bed. As Emmett walked towards the door of the guest room, Luke called out to him once more.

“Emmett?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you think I am ungrateful?”

“Ungrateful?” Emmett frowned, not sure he understood. “Why would you say that?”

“It's just... something Jenny said earlier... That I didn't know how grateful I should be because I had two parents that loved me when... she... Gus... my fathers... when everyone had been rejected by their parents in one way or another... I don't know... am I ungrateful?”

“I don't know about you being ungrateful or not... it's hard to judge you for something you have never experienced yourself, but... I guess to some degree, I think I get what she's saying. You're very lucky that you have such loving parents who will support you and will always be in your corner, no matter what. I am not sure if you should be grateful for it or if it makes you ungrateful when you don't appreciate it... I just think it makes you a very lucky boy. But you have your own pain to deal with, so... I am not sure if that's really much better. Everyone has problems, Luke. They're not all the same and we can't compare them, but what I have learned in life so far is that on some level most people are dealing with pain of one kind or another. The fact that you have been spared pain for such a long time... I think it puts you in a lucky position, but that doesn't make the pain you're feeling now any less real or any less painful, so... I don't know about being ungrateful. I don't think so.”

Luke smiled slightly as he nodded at Emmett. “Thanks, Em. I really appreciate what you told me.”

“Always, honey.” With that Emmett turned around once more and left Luke on his own with his thoughts.

Chapter 26

After the family had met at Britin for another family dinner without Luke, who had stayed behind at Emmett's place, they moved on to another week in their new normal. 

Gus was back in New York, Luke and Vicky were back in school, Justin was back to working on the paintings for his show and Brian was back at work at Kinnetik. Only that he had left early. As he always did when Luke had a soccer game and this Monday was no different. 

Brian had driven out to Luke's school and had gone to the soccer pitch behind the school building where Luke's team and the opposing team were already playing their match.

It wasn't a championship match and merely a friendly between the two teams to see where they were standing while the championship was on hold between Thanksgiving and the New Year, but Brian wouldn't have missed it for anything. 

Luke was pretty much the star of his team, an incredibly talented and versatile midfielder who had led his team to many wins in the last year. He was so good and so talented that Brian wouldn't be surprised if Luke got offered a soccer scholarship as well one day. Not that he would need it, they had enough money to pay for any eduction that Luke would want, but still, it had warmed Brian's heart to know that Luke had actually stepped into his footsteps and had followed his path in soccer. 

Brian had always stayed interested in soccer even after he had left university and had left the scholarship behind and soccer was one of the things that was just theirs. Neither Gus nor Vicky were really all that interested in sports and Justin was pretty much a lost cause when it came to any sports at all, but Luke and Brian had always bonded over their love for the sport. They would often play together in their garden, would often go on runs together to stay in shape and Brian could remember more games than not that they had watched together at home on their TV, yelling at referees or players. Soccer was their thing and it was their one on one time. A time that Brian sorely missed now that Luke had moved out and wasn't talking to them. 

Whenever possible, Brian would attend Luke's games and he would make sure to make it possible for him to attend even if it meant rescheduling presentations or other meetings. By now Cynthia and Ted were already well used to Brian rescheduling meetings because a game had been added to Luke's schedule. And this day was no different. 

Luke wasn't talking to them and Brian respected that, but it didn't mean that he wasn't proud of his son's talent and didn't want to support him. 

He had made sure to arrive a couple of minutes into the game, so Luke would already be on the pitch and wouldn't notice him as he watched the game. He didn't want to make his son feel uncomfortable and also didn't want him to feel pressured into any kind of conversation he clearly wasn't ready for. Brian would respect that Luke didn't want to speak to him or Justin, no matter how much that might hurt and would just watch the game from afar. 

The first half of the game had gone very well for Luke's team and by the time the second half of the game started, Luke's team was leading 3:1. Luke had prepared two of the goals and had created quite a few chances for his team. Brian was really proud of how well his son was playing. 

He watched as Luke got the ball once again and got ready to make his way towards the opposing team's penalty area. He sprinted down the pitch, keeping the ball close by, clearly looking for any team members he could pass the ball to. Just as he had apparently found someone and got ready to pass, Brian saw an opposing player come towards him at high speed. Just as Luke passed the ball towards his team mate, the player from the other team crashed into him and threw him to the ground. Brian could hear Luke's scream as he fell to the grass and held his ankle in obvious pain.

Obviously fouls happened in soccer, Brian was well used to that and had been the victim of quite a few himself, but he could immediately see that this had been serious. Luke was still lying on the grass, clutching his ankle, his face showing obvious pain. Luke wasn't a player to go into theatrics when he was fouled and just the fact that he was still lying on the floor, clutching his ankle several seconds after the other player had crashed into him, showed Brian that he had really gotten hurt. If he had been alright, Luke would have just gotten up, brushed himself off and continued with the  game. 

Having played soccer for so long himself, Brian was very aware of all the types of injuries a foul like that could cause and his concern immediately grew the longer Luke stayed lying on the pitch.

He watched as the coach and assistant coach made their way to where Luke was lying, obviously wanting to find out what was going on. For a second he had contemplated running over as well, but then decided to stay back. He was not part of the team and didn't want to be one of those fathers. He trusted the coach, knew he was a very capable man and would take good care of his star player. 

Brian watched as the coach and assistant coach helped Luke up and took an arm over each of their shoulders, helping him hop to the side line, so they could further check out his ankle. He hardly paid attention to the referee who was showing the other player a yellow card for his foul and gave Luke's team a freekick. His whole attention was focused on his son whose face was still showing clear signs of pain as he sat down on the bench, immediately surrounded by the team mates that had been on the bench, all looking at him in concern. 

Knowing that there was nothing he could do, but also knowing that he needed to know what was going on, Brian slowly made his way over towards the bench and got close enough to follow the conversation between Luke and his assistant coach. 

“Does it hurt?”

“Yeah, like hell... I think it might be broken.”

“It's already swelling. This doesn't look good, Luke,” the assistant coach said as he carefully tried to remove Luke's shoe from his injured foot. 

“Argh,” Luke groaned in pain as the shoe was taken off to reveal a very swollen ankle. “Fuck!”

“I think we need to get this checked out by a doctor to make sure nothing is broken or torn,” the assistant coach said as he slowly moved Luke's ankle, clearly causing the boy more pain. He carefully let go of the ankle and got an ice pack from the first aid kit he had nearby. “Keep ice on it for now and I'll take you to the emergency room when the game is over.”

Luke nodded, but before he got the chance to say something, they were interrupted by Brian who had now moved directly behind the bench and had followed the whole conversation. “I will take him now.”

Luke's head whipped around in surprise when his eyes settled on his father. “Dad?”

“Mr. Kinney-Taylor,” the assistant coach greeted Brian, knowing him from some of their previous games and previous interactions. Kinnetik was one of the biggest team sponsors, Luke was their best player, so of course he was familiar with Brian. “I didn't see you. I wasn't aware you were here for the game.”

Brian just nodded once, then repeated his earlier statement. “I will take him to the emergency room now. There is no point in waiting in case something might be broken or torn.”

The assistant coach nodded, agreeing with Brian that they shouldn't waste time, secretly quite glad about his offer. He couldn't have left before the game was over as he had to stay with the other players, but if Luke's father was able to take him to the emergency room right away, that would be best for everyone involved. 

“I am fine, Dad,” Luke pressed out, not sure how he felt about his Dad suddenly being there and offering to take him to the hospital. 

“Your ankle says otherwise,” Brian just replied, then came around the bench and looked at the assistant coach. “I've parked over there. Can you help me get him to the car?”

The young man nodded and together they helped Luke hop towards Brian's car. Luke had by now realised that complaining would be futile and his father seemed to be on a mission and really, his ankle hurt so bad, he was actually quite glad not to have to wait another 25 minutes before he could get it looked at. 

They placed Luke in the back of the car where he was able to keep his ankle in an elevated position. They replaced the ice pack on his ankle to help with the swelling and then just waited for one of Luke's teammates to get his stuff from the changing room. 

There was an awkward silence between Brian and Luke as they waited for Luke's stuff after the assistant coach had returned back to the game. 

“Does it hurt?” Brian asked, trying to get a conversation going, but all he got in return from Luke was a nod, no reply. “We'll get you to the emergency room in a minute.” 

Luke nodded once again, otherwise chose to ignore his Dad as best as he could. 

Once one of his friends had brought over his bag with his stuff, Brian thanked the boy and they were off on their way. 

The ride to the hospital had been quiet and the silence had clearly been uncomfortable, but neither had felt like talking anymore by that point. 

Brian parked the car close to the entrance, then helped Luke out and into the emergency room. He helped him settle on a chair, then went to sign them in with the nurse at the desk. He quietly spoke to her, explaining what had happened and returned to Luke's side a few minutes later with a lot of paperwork that he immediately started to fill in with the required insurance information. 

Luke pretty much ignored what Brian was doing and ignored him, focusing on his swollen ankle instead. When he took away the ice pack and touched the ankle, he cursed at the pain he could feel. “Fuck!”

“Don't touch it!” Brian just said automatically as he threw a quick glance in Luke's direction. “You don't want to make it any worse.”

Luke just nodded, then exhaled deeply. “Shit...”

“It will be alright. I am sure it's not broken and just a sprain.”

“What? Are you a doctor now?” Luke muttered before he could help himself. 

“No, but I know a thing or two about broken bones and sports injuries,” Brian just gave back, his voice calmer than both he himself and Luke had expected. 

Luke knew that the reference to broken bones had been a reference to his dad's childhood and if what his papa had told him was correct, his dad really knew a thing or two about broken bones. Knowing that he had been out of line with his comment anyway, he decided to stay quiet for the moment. Instead he just nodded. 

He watched as his father returned to the desk to give the paperwork to the nurse sitting there and when he came back, Luke saw him holding his phone. 

“I should call your Papa. He should know what has happened,” Brian just announced before he moved towards a quiet corner of the waiting room. 

“Don't, Dad. Please!” Luke said, looking up at his father from pained eyes. 

When Brian frowned at him, Luke went on. 

“He will only worry and... we don't even know what is wrong... Can't you tell him what's wrong when we know? You know he will worry.”

Brian eyed his son for a few seconds and Luke held his gaze. In the end Brian nodded, knowing that Luke was right. Justin would worry and there was no reason to worry him when they didn't even know what was wrong. 

“Thanks,” Luke said quietly, already feeling like it was hard enough to deal with one of his fathers, not knowing if he really had the strength to deal with both of them right now. 

A heavy silence settled between them once more as Brian sat down at Luke's side and together they waited to be seen by a doctor. 

After another 30 minutes they were finally seen by a doctor, who immediately ordered an X-ray and an ultrasound to check for any broken bones or torn ligaments. By now Luke's ankle had swollen quite a bit, so it was obvious that something was wrong. 

It took them another hour until the doctor saw them again. Thankfully there didn't seem to be any broken bones or torn ligaments, but it was clear that the ankle had been sprained. 

Both father and son seemed equally relieved when the doctor told them that it seemed to be a simple sprain and that Luke should be back to normal in 1-2 weeks time. He attached a brace to the ankle to keep pressure off the joint and told Luke to use crutches for at least the next week to keep weight off his ankle as much as possible. He also advised him to keep using ice to keep the swelling down and to keep his foot elevated as much as he could to help his body absorb extra fluid. Last but not least, he asked to see Luke again in a week's time to see if there was any progress on his ankle. 

Once they arrived back at Brian's car, Brian helped put away the crutches and to get Luke comfortable again. “I'll get you back to Emmett's place now,” was all he said as he climbed into the car himself and Luke just nodded. 

They then headed into Pittsburgh in complete silence, a silence that gnawed at both of them. 

“Dad?” Luke asked, when they got close to Emmett's house, feeling like he needed to say something. 

“Yeah?”

“Thanks for not calling Papa,” Luke said quietly and Brian nodded in response. 

He then met Luke's gaze in the rearview mirror. “I'll have to tell him though. There's no way I can keep this from him. He'll most likely come by later to check on you.”

Luke nodded, not really surprised by that. He knew his papa would need to know what had happened and he also wasn't really surprised that he would show up later to check on him. Out of his two fathers, his papa was usually the one that got more nervous when one of them was sick or injured. His dad was usually the one that kept a level head and stayed calm. 

“Okay,” Luke said quietly, not really having expected anything else. 

When they pulled up outside Emmett's house, Brian helped Luke out of the car and took his stuff as Luke made his way towards the door. 

“Dad?” he said once more as he turned to his father after he had rung the doorbell. 

Brian turned towards him and met his gaze, showing that he was listening. 

“Thanks for taking me to the emergency room,” Luke said, his voice sounding genuine as he spoke. 

Brian only nodded once more and before he had a chance to reply anything, Drew opened the door. He took one look at Luke on crutches, still in his soccer outfit, his jacket loosely hanging over his shoulders and Brian carrying all his stuff. He had been playing football long enough to know what a sports injury looked like and just nodded in acknowledgement.

“Anything broken or torn?” He just asked, looking from Brian to Luke and back and seeming quite relieved when both shook their head in reply. 

“It's just a sprained ankle,” Brian said quietly. “He needs to keep it elevated, needs to keep ice on it and shouldn't put any weight or pressure on it for at least a week.”

“Been there, it sucks, but there are worse injuries,” Drew said earnestly as he stepped aside to let Luke into the house. 

Brian nodded, knowing that if anyone in their family was familiar with this type of injury it would be Drew. 

“Just make sure he doesn't overdo it,” Brian said quietly as he handed Drew Luke's bag. 

Drew nodded once more. “Don't worry. I know how to take care of a sprained ankle. He will be fine.”

“Yeah, I know,” Brian sighed, then ran a hand over his face. “Justin doesn't know yet. I wouldn't be surprised if he came by later just to check that he's alright. He doesn't deal well when one of the kids is hurt or in pain...”

“I don't blame him,” Drew said, knowing that Brian wasn't really faring much better. One look at the man told him as much. He looked exhausted. “Do I want to know why you're the one bringing him here?”

Brian shrugged. “I was at the game when he got fouled. Took him to the emergency room so he wouldn't have to wait until the assistant coach was free to take him after the game.”

“He'll be fine, Brian,” Drew said once more, seeing how drained his friend looked. 

“Yeah, I know,” Brian sighed, then nodded towards his car. “I better get home and tell Justin what happened. I'll see you around.”

Drew nodded, then watched as Brian headed back to his car. Brian didn't even seem to notice that he was still being watched as he settled in the car and ran his hands over his face twice before he started the car and made his way back home. 

***

“Brian, what happened? You're late,” Justin said as Brian came into the house, already waiting for him as he took off his coat and gloves. When Brian turned towards him and Justin saw his face and how exhausted and drained he looked, his concern immediately grew. “Brian?”

“Luke got injured at his game,” Brian said and saw as Justin's hand flew to his mouth in obvious shock. He immediately went on before Justin could get too scared. “It's nothing serious, just a sprained ankle. I took him to the emergency room to get him checked out. I then took him back to Pittsburgh to Emmett's place. It's why I am so late.”

“Is he okay?”

Brian nodded, immediately seeing the fear in Justin's eyes and on his face. “He's fine. He'll have to use crutches for a week and needs to keep ice on it, but should be fine otherwise. He wasn't even in pain anymore by the time we left the hospital.”

“How did it happen?”

“Some guy from the other team tried to take the ball from him, but hit his ankle instead of the ball. It was a stupid foul. He'll be fine.”

“Why didn't you call me? I could have met you at the hospital,” Justin said, his voice now taking on a slightly accusatory tone. 

“He asked me not to,” Brian just said, then took Justin's hand and led him back towards the kitchen. “He didn't want to scare you before we knew what was going on.”

Justin eyed Brian dubiously, making it clear what he thought of that argument. 

“And I think... he already had a hard enough time dealing with my presence,” Brian added, sighing deeply before he went on. “I don't think having both of us there would have helped him under the current circumstances.”

Justin nodded, having heard something in Brian's voice that worried him. “And you? Are you okay?”

Brian shrugged. “I am fine.”

“Brian,” Justin said, looking at his husband, making it clear that he expected an honest answer. 

“I don't like seeing him in pain... and knowing that me being the one that took him to the hospital only added to his discomfort... what do you want me to say, Sunshine? It made me feel like shit...”

“Oh Brian,” Justin sighed, running a hand through his husband's hair. “I am sorry.”

“What for? It's not your fault. It's just the way things are now...”

“I just... I wish things were different,” Justin said quietly, pulling Brian close and hugging him. “I can see how much you're hurting and... I hate seeing you like this... I hate seeing Luke this angry with you...with us... I just wish things would return to normal.”

“Yeah, I don't think that will happen anytime soon,” Brian said morosely, holding Justin tight, allowing himself some comfort from his hug. “You should have seen his face when he realised that I was at the game and that I would take him to the hospital. He hardly spoke to me at all the whole time we were there...”

“Things will change, Brian... We just need to give him time,” Justin said quietly, never letting go of the man in his arms. 

“I know... it's just so damn hard,” Brian whispered back, before he pulled back from Justin's embrace. “What about the princess? Is she already in bed?”

Justin nodded. “Yeah, but I think she might still be awake. She wanted to wait for you to come home and tell her a story. She only went to bed about ten minutes ago.”

“Okay, I'll check. Wouldn't do to make her go to sleep without her story,” Brian said, meeting his husband's concerned gaze head on. “I'll be fine, Sunshine. Stop worrying.”

“I'll always worry,” Justin admitted, running a gentle hand over Brian's arm. 

“You should go. I know you want to head into town and check on Luke. I already told him to expect your visit...,” Brian said, seeing the look in Justin's eyes that he knew so well. Justin was torn between taking care of him and taking care of one of their kids, being torn on who needed him more right now. 

“Are you sure?” He asked, as if to confirm Brian's thoughts. “I don't want to leave you alone.”

“I am not alone. I'll have the princess to keep me company. You go and check on Luke. I'll still be here when you get back,” Brian nodded. “I'll be fine. I promise. Now go! I know you want to.”

“Okay, but I'll be back soon,” Justin finally agreed, never leaving Brian's eyes as he spoke. “I just... need to make sure he's okay.”

“I know,” Brian smiled gently, pulling Justin close once more. He placed a gentle kiss on his lips, his smile growing wider as he spoke again. “It's why you're such a great father.”

“Well, I have a feeling Luke might disagree on that and... might not be that happy about my visit,” Justin admitted, knowing full well that Luke probably didn't want to see him. And he could understand that, but he just needed to make sure that he was alright. 

“He'll be fine. We will all be,” Brian said, then pulled back. “Now go! I'll check on the princess.”

“I left you some salad in the fridge,” Justin said as he headed towards the hallway to grab his coat and car keys. “Eat it!”

Brian nodded, knowing that eating was the last thing on his mind, but also knowing that Justin was worried about him as well and he wouldn't do anything to worry him any more than necessary. “I will. Now go!”

Justin nodded, then turned towards the door and left. 

Brian kept watching the door for a couple of seconds, then turned around and made his way upstairs to Vicky's room. Even if she was already asleep, some time with his daughter might just be what he needed now. 

Chapter 27

“Yeah,” Luke rolled his eyes in annoyance as there was yet another knock on his door.

Ever since Emmett had come home from whatever event he had been working at that afternoon, he had pretty much stopped by Luke's room every couple of minutes to make sure that he was okay and didn't need anything. Even Drew had told Emmett by now to leave Luke alone and that he was clearly old enough to let them know if he needed something. Luke had thrown Drew a grateful smile when he had said that to Emmett, but by the looks of it, Emmett hadn't really listened.

He was slightly surprised when the door opened and his father entered the guestroom. Though he shouldn't have been. His Dad had pretty much told him that there was no way his Papa wouldn't come by and check on him and he had also known that much himself. Yet he hadn't really expected him to be here that quickly.

“I just wanted to make sure that you're okay,” Justin said by way of greeting as he slowly made his way into the guestroom and looked at Luke from clearly concerned eyes.

“It's just a sprained ankle,” Luke rolled his eyes once more and left no doubt about how annoyed he was when he replied. “I am not dying.”

Justin let the comment slide, not really having expected a warmer welcome anyway.

“Are you in pain?” He asked instead, looking at Luke's ankle that was elevated on a couple of pillows and had an ice pack resting on it.

“No,” Luke replied honestly, putting his phone that he he had been typing on to the side. “It stopped hurting a while ago.”

“That's good,” Justin nodded. “Is there anything you need? Anything I can get you?”

Luke sighed audibly, then shook his head. “I am not an invalid. I can still move around and get whatever I need myself.”

“Okay,” Justin nodded, once again letting the annoyed tone in his son's voice slide. “I just needed to make sure that you're okay.”

“I haven't been okay in days and it has nothing to do with my ankle,” Luke angrily muttered before he could help himself.

“Luke,” Justin sighed, slowly moving towards the bed in the room and sitting down at the side. He was glad when Luke didn't protest, though he didn't really look happy about Justin sitting down either. “I know you're angry with us and I respect that, but you're still my son and you got hurt today and I needed to make sure that you were okay.”

“I am sure Dad told you that I was fine.”

“Yeah, he did, but... sometimes you need to see with your own eyes and not just hear from other people.” Justin looked at Luke sadly. “I wish you would have called me earlier. I could have come to the hospital.”

“What for?” Luke frowned. “I am not a baby that needs you to hold my hand while the evil doctor prods and examines me.”

Justin shrugged. “Just to be there and to know what was going on. I don't like not being included when important things like this happen.”

Luke frowned, then eyed his father from slightly surprised eyes. “You're not angry with Dad for not telling you, are you? I asked him not to...”

“No, I am not,” Justin shook his head. “Though he should have told me anyway...”

“He obviously did,” Luke pointed out. “And I am fine.”

“Yeah, I guess you are,” Justin sighed, before he slowly got up. “Just let us know if you need anything, okay? Whatever it is. Your Dad and I can get it for you.”

Luke nodded, then watched as his father made his way over to the door. He noticed how he hung his shoulders and looked rather dejected. “Are you alright?”

Justin stopped, then turned to look at Luke. “No, but it doesn't matter. You're alright, it's what I came here for, so I'll leave now. I know you don't want to talk to me, so I won't bother you any longer.”

“Papa...”

“It's okay. You made your wishes clear and I should have respected that. I am sorry I came here. I just needed to know that you were okay.”

“Papa,” Luke said again, this time on a sigh. “Why did you come?”

“I told you,” Justin said quietly. “I needed to make sure that you were okay.”

“Why? It's just a sprained ankle. I didn't get a life-threatening injury. You knew I would be okay even without coming here. Dad told you.”

Justin smiled wryly. “It doesn't work like that.”

“What doesn't?” Luke frowned, not sure he really understood what his father had meant with that statement.

“A parent's love... Sometimes words just aren't enough and you need to see with your own eyes that your baby is okay.”

“I am not a baby,” Luke gave back angrily.

“You'll always be my baby,” Justin said sadly, then moved towards the door once more. When he had reached the door, he turned around to Luke once more. “I know you're angry with us, but... I still love you. I'll always love you. And that means I'll always worry about you. It's not something I can just stop because you don't want to see me. It's not how this whole father-son thing works for me.”

Luke stayed quiet for the longest time and Justin was sure he was done talking to him, so he opened the door. Just as he was about to leave the room, he heard Luke's quiet voice once more.

“Why did Dad come to my game today?”

“You'll really have to ask him for an answer, but my guess is that he came for the same reason he always comes to your games. Because he loves you and is incredibly proud of you and he wanted to support you.”

“Even though I don't want to talk to him and see him?” Luke asked.

“Just because your feelings for us have changed, doesn't mean our feelings for you have changed. Your Dad still loves you as much as he always did and is every bit as proud of you as he has always been,” Justin replied quietly, knowing that it was the truth. “Just as I am.”

Once more Luke remained silent and Justin thought that their conversation was over. He once again moved to leave the room only to be interrupted by Luke's voice once again. This time it was hardly above a whisper, but Justin had still heard every word he had said.

“Did you only forgive him because of me?”

Justin slowly turned around and looked at Luke with a question in his eyes. “Why would you ask that?”

“Did you?” Luke only asked again, not blinking as he held his father's gaze.

“I forgave your Dad because I loved him... because I love him more than anything...,” Justin replied honestly.

“But you didn't when you forgave him. It's why you got back together with him after everything had happened, but it's not why you forgave him in the first place, is it?”

Justin shook his head, carefully choosing his words. “I guess... on some level I always loved your father, even then... but back then there was so much anger and pain involved, I don't think love played a big part in my decisions...”

“So you only forgave him because of me?” Luke asked once more, looking at Justin from pained eyes.

“Would that bother you?” Justin asked, looking at his son carefully, not sure where this conversation was headed.

“Don't answer my question with a question of your own,” Luke snapped, glaring at his father. “Just answer it!”

Justin slowly moved back into the room, this time sitting down in the chair at the desk. He looked at Luke when he answered, choosing his words carefully.

“I guess, yes. I started to forgive him because I knew it would be the best for you.”

“And everyone else as well?” Luke asked, glaring at his father from icy eyes.

“Yes, everyone else as well. At the time it seemed like the best thing to do for you,” Justin said honestly.

“Why?”

Justin shrugged. “You loved your father. You loved your grandparents. You loved Ted and Blake. That was your family and you loved them. I didn't want you to lose that.”

“And I would have if you hadn't forgiven them?” Luke frowned.

“At the time I was sure, yes,” Justin nodded. “I didn't see any way you wouldn't be negatively affected if I didn't start forgiving them.”

“How would it have affected me?”

Justin met Luke's eyes and held his questioning gaze for the longest time. “You would have caught on to the tension between me and the rest of the family. You would have noticed that something was wrong, that something was off. You would have been impacted by that, I have no doubt. I don't know what would have happened exactly, but... let's just say I hadn't forgiven them and had insisted on staying angry with all of them... There would have never been a birthday you could have celebrated with your whole family. I would have always been absent and you and I would have celebrated on our own. The same for Christmas. The same for any other holiday... You would have never been able to celebrate any holiday with your whole family. There might have been arguments between me and your Dad about who would get to celebrate with you when. You might have noticed those and would have found out that something had happened between me and your Dad. And maybe you would have found out what had happened and would have lost all respect and love for your Dad...”

“Why would you have cared? I might have decided that I prefered staying with you to staying with Dad... I might have chosen you over him and his lies...”

“And then? Your relationships with your grandparents, with your uncles, with Gus... everything would have changed for you. Would that have been worth it? Spending time with you at that cost? You were happy, Luke. The happiest boy one could imagine. No matter how angry I was at your father, the one thing I always knew was that he loved you more than anything and that you loved him. I would have never taken that away from you. I would have never broken up that relationship. Never!”

“Why not? Wouldn't that have been sweet revenge?” Luke asked, his voice colder than Justin had ever heard it.

He looked at Luke sadly. “I guess, but at what price? You would have lost your relationship with your father. You would have lost your relationship with your brother. You would have lost all the relationships that made you the happy boy you were. I would have never taken that away from you.”

“Even knowing what he did?”

“Especially knowing what he did,” Justin affirmed.

“I don't get it... I don't get why you didn't get back at him. Why you didn't punish him for what he did...”

“I lost my father's love... for different reasons, but... I lost it. Your Dad never had his father's love to begin with... I would have never wanted that for you. I would have never wanted you to experience that feeling of losing a parent. And honestly? I didn't need to punish your father for what he had done... There was no one judging him harsher than he judged himself for his actions,” Justin ended quietly.

“What do you mean?”

“At the beginning... when I was still angry and in pain... I didn't see it and I guess at that time all my actions were directed by an urge to make sure that you would be as happy as you could be, by making sure that you would be impacted as little as possible by our problems. So yeah, I guess at that time I forgave him because of you, because I knew it was the only way you could have both of us in your life without it affecting your happiness. I knew that your Dad and I at least needed to be on speaking terms to be able to raise you together. But back then, we were a long way away from even being friends... even further away from being partners... I honestly didn't even think about ever having a relationship with your father again. All I could think about was making sure that you would have both of us in your life and that we would be the best fathers we could be to you. That meant we needed to talk, that meant we needed to discuss things, so I needed to find a way to be on speaking terms with your father and that meant putting aside my anger and moving on. And I did, but... it took me months before I really started seeing all the impact this whole mess had also had on your father. It took me months to see how much guilt he was carrying around day in and out. How much he blamed himself for what had happened. And maybe I should have been happy about that, I don't know, but... it only hurt me. Because the more I saw him with you, with Gus... The more I saw the father that he had been to you both... the more I saw the man he had become in the years I had been in New York, the more I knew that he had changed and truly regretted his actions. When he had made the decision to keep you a secret from me... he was a different man, Luke. The man that your father is now, the man I saw being a father to you and Gus... he would have never made this decision to begin with.”

Luke nodded slowly. “Emmett said the same... that he forgave Dad because he is a different man now than he was back then and that he forgave the man that Dad is now.”

Justin smiled slightly, not able to help himself. “I am glad Emmett could also see that your father had changed. I know it might sound empty, but he has... The man that has raised you so well for five years...that man felt incredibly guilty and carried a heavy burden with him day in and out because he knew that what he had done was wrong and had caused everyone incredible pain. And I guess, I started to forgive him because I thought it was best for you, but with time... the more time I got to spend with him... I forgave him for himself. Because I loved him and knew that he had changed.”

“But you loved him before and now everyone says he has changed so much, but... you still loved him? How can you still love him if he changed so much?” It was clear that Luke was really struggling to understand what Justin was telling him about his father.

“Yes, I loved him, but... it was a different kind of relationship we had back then and I guess I loved him because I knew what kind of person he was deep down. Sometimes he was hiding that person very well, but he would show me his true self often enough... And that's who I loved. The person I knew your Dad was with me... The person I knew he could be. And when I came back from New York... After spending more time with you and him...I saw that he had finally become the person I had always known he could be. The person I had loved, but he had never allowed himself to be for fear of rejection. Thanks to you and Gus he had allowed himself to become that person and that's the person I forgave and fell in love with. That's the person I married.”

“Thanks to me and Gus?” Luke frowned.

“Yes, because you two loved him in the way only a child can love a parent. You two showed him that love didn't come at a price, that love wasn't something you had to earn and pay for. You two showed him that love just existed and it was okay to accept it. That accepting that love made you happy, gave you strength, helped you in ways you never knew. The fact that you and Gus loved him unconditionally just because he loved you and took care of you... it showed him that love was a wonderful thing and nothing to be scared of. Love wasn't something he had to be scared of, love wasn't something that hurt, it was something beautiful that made him happier than he ever thought he could be. He loved you and he wasn't scared of showing it the way he had been scared of showing his love before. He knew that with you and Gus he didn't have to be scared of you rejecting him. He loved you and for that you loved him back in the way only a child can love a parent. And I think it was the best feeling he ever experienced.”

“Did you ever regret forgiving him?” Luke asked, looking at his father from curious eyes.

“Not a single day,” Justin smiled widely as he looked at Luke. “Your Dad asked me a long time ago if I regretted that we didn't get married the first time he asked me, before I went to New York.”

“Do you?” Luke asked, wondering why his father was telling him this.

“No,” Justin shook his head, once again smiling.

“But if you had gotten married then... None of this would have happened, right?” Luke looked confused, not sure if he understood what his father was saying.

“Probably not, but something else might have happened. Your father was a different man then, not ready for love and committment like he was years later when I came back from New York. We might have broken up anyway... the marriage might not have worked anyway.”

“But you would have known about me.”

Justin slowly shook his head before he answered. “I don't think we would have had you, to be honest.”

When Luke frowned, Justin continued.

“You were conceived the night before I left for New York. I know this isn't something any teenager wants to hear about their parents, but... your Dad and I were having farewell sex in his apartment all night long and that's when you were conceived... If I had married him, if I hadn't left for New York... we might have never had you... we might have never had Vicky and that's a life I can't even imagine. I can't imagine a life without you and Vicky and I don't care how much pain and hard work it cost us to get to the point where we became a happy family. To me it was all worth it because I have the most wonderful children I could have ever wished for and... to imagine a life where you and Vicky aren't my children... No, I can't do that,” Justin looked right at Luke. “It wasn't easy, but I wouldn't change anything because the family we have now, have had for the last ten years... it's everything I've ever dreamed of and just the thought of not having that family... it's too painful to even imagine.”

“Really? You wouldn't change anything?”

“No, not if it risked losing what we have now,” Justin shook his head, then looked at Luke closely. “I know it doesn't seem that way, but I consider myself incredibly lucky. I know that after everything your father and I have already been through, after everything we've already mastered together... there is nothing that will ever pull us apart again and that's an incredibly powerful feeling. We've made it through the worst pain you can imagine, we have made it through sickness and betrayal and lies and more sickness and we're still here and going stronger than ever. That's an incredibly powerful feeling and I hope that one day... one day you will get to love someone just as I love your Dad and I know he loves me because... it's the best feeling in the world.”

Justin was smiling widely by the time he finished.

“And you're not even angry at him at all anymore?”

“No,” Justin said, his voice sincere as he spoke. “I was angry for a long time, but... it really didn't do anything for me. It didn't help me at all. Being angry only made things harder because it left me all alone. You, your Dad, your grandparents... you were a family. I was not part of that and my anger kept me an outsider. Forgiving all of them... it wasn't easy, but it was the best decision I ever made because it allowed me to become a part of that family as well and it allowed all of us to move on.”

“I am not sure that I can forgive them,” Luke whispered, looking at his hands in his lap. “I don't know if can just forget about the lies and betrayal.”

“Forgiving doesn't mean forgetting, Luke,” Justin said seriously. “I forgave them, but I never forgot what they did. And neither did they. We're all aware of what happened, but decided to give our family another chance and to try and move on. It's not easy, I won't lie, but... I think it will be worth it in the end.”

“Don't you ever regret that you never got to hold me as a baby? That you didn't get to see me being born?”

Justin looked at Luke sadly, easily hearing his pain when he asked his questions.

“All the time,” he admitted. “But I can't only blame everyone else for that. I played my own part in that as well, Luke. And... while it wasn't easy to admit that to myself, I have and know my responsibility for missing these moments as well.”

“But you didn't know. Dad lied to you,” Luke pointed out.

“Yeah, but I knew that something was going on. When your Dad broke off all contact with me, I knew there had to be a reason. I came back to Pittsburgh to confront him and find out what the reason was and... your Dad hid from me and I never got to see him. So I went back to New York, hurt and dejected and I stayed in New York. And that is on me. Not your Dad. I knew that something must have happened for him to just end things like that. I could have tried harder to find out what it was, but I didn't. I stayed away in New York when I could have just come back and tried to confront him again and again. He couldn't have hidden from me for five years... But I didn't and that is on me, not your Dad.”

Luke eyed his father for the longest time before he spoke again. “Why didn't you come back before?”

Justin sighed, looking at Luke sadly. “Because the relationship that your father and I had been in at the time had been so fucked up... I felt like I couldn't face him again before I had made a name for myself and had become an artist that could live off his art. I felt like I had to prove to myself and your Dad that I could be an adult, could provide for myself... Could be the man I thought he wanted me to be so he would consider me an equal...”

“I don't think Dad ever cared about you being successful or not. I think he would have still loved you anyway,” Luke said quietly.

“Yeah, I think you're right, but at the time... I wasn't so sure... which is really due to the fact that we didn't communicate and didn't really tell each other what we wanted... It was a completely different relationship then and I am not sure it would have worked out. As crazy as it sounds... Maybe we needed all of this to happen so we could both realise what we really wanted and could finally admit it to ourselves. Maybe we needed those years apart to grow up and become the people we both needed to be to make this relationship work.”

“That's kind of fucked up,” Luke admitted.

“I guess it is, but... that's kind of what we and our relationship were like back then,” Justin replied honestly. “I would never wish the pain and betrayal I felt when I found out the truth about you on anyone... It's the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my life, but... it got us to where we are now. It got us to the point where we decided to have your sister, where we decided to get married... I would never want to change that for anything.”

“But we're not that happy family now,” Luke said quietly.

“No,” Justin agreed sadly. “But I haven't given up hope that we can be that family again one day. Luke, I know that you're angry with us and you're allowed to be. I was angry and I didn't forgive people in a week, but... I hope that one day you will also come to realise how much everyone loves you and how much you love them and... maybe... we'll all be able to work through this together one day and move on just like your Dad and I were able to ten years ago.”

“Jenny said I should be more grateful for the fact that I have two fathers that love me and shouldn't be so harsh on you when pretty much everyone else has lost a parent in one way or another,” Luke admitted quietly, not looking at Justin, but at his hands.

“And she is entitled to her opinion, but so are you to yours,” Justin moved the chair closer to the bed and reached out a hand to touch Luke's hand. He gave it a soft squeeze. “You are entitled to be as angry with us for as long as you want to be. You are entitled to your feelings and emotions and no one can tell you how you should feel... I am sure what she said was impacted by the situation going on with her mother, but... she doesn't really know how you feel. She's not the one going through this, you are. And therefore it's totally up to you how you should react.”

When Luke didn't say anything to that, Justin squeezed his hand once more. “I just want you to know that... even when you're angry with us and hate us... we love you. Both your Dad and I love you more than anything and I really hope that one day... one day we can all talk about this and try to move on together as the family that we are, but... even if that will never happen... your Dad and I will never stop loving you, honey,” Justin ended, his voice breaking on the last words.

Luke eyed him and saw the emotions on his father's face. “I don't hate you,” he said quietly in a voice hardly above a whisper. “I know I said it, but... I don't... I was just so angry...”

Justin looked at him and nodded. “I know... so was I when I first found out. I remember yelling at your Dad that I hated him and... I never did... I was hurt, I was angry... but I never hated him and... when you asked me days later why I would say that I hated your Dad... I felt so bad because you had heard me in that moment of anger...”

“I remember that,” Luke said, now giving his father's hand a squeeze. “I guess I am your son after all...I don't think I ever really meant it either...”

When Justin saw the small smile on Luke's face, he couldn't help but smile himself. “Yes, you are. Not that there was ever much doubt about that,” he whispered as he ran a hand through Luke's blond hair that was so much like his own and looked at eyes that everyone said were so much like his own.

“Thank you for coming by, Papa... to check on me even though you knew I was okay,” Luke said sincerely, smiling slightly at his father. “You didn't have to do that.”

“I wanted to,” Justin said.

“I know,” Luke said quietly, this time smiling wider.

They talked for another couple of minutes, before they decided that they had talked enough for one evening. When Justin said goodbye, his heart did little jumps when Luke promised that he would be in touch to keep his father updated on his ankle.

As far as Justin was concerned that promise was the best thing he had heard in days.

***

“Hey, you're late. Everything okay?” Brian asked quietly as Justin came into their bedroom. It was already late and he had already turned off the lights, but was still awake.

“Yeah,” Justin said as he settled on his side of the bed, leaning over to touch Brian's face. He gently ran his hand over his husband's cheek. “Luke and I talked.”

“That's good, right?” Brian asked, raising an eyebrow in question.

“I think so,” Justin nodded.

“Is he okay?” Brian asked in a voice that barely hid his concern.

“Yeah,” Justin said, meeting Brian's concerned gaze. “His ankle is fine and I think... I think other things are starting to heal as well.”

“Really?” Brian couldn't help but voice his surprise.

“Yeah, I think it will still take time, but... we took a step in the right direction today.”

“Then that's all that matters,” Brian said quietly, taking Justin's hand and giving it a squeeze.

“Yeah,” Justin agreed, smiling slightly. “I think he's slowly coming around...”

“You're a miracle worker, Sunshine,” Brian whispered as he leaned in and gave his husband a kiss.

“I think it was just time and he's ready,” Justin replied when the kiss ended. “I am just glad we were able to talk and... that things seem to be moving in the right direction.”

“That's good,” Brian agreed. “That's really good.”

“I'll be back in a minute,” Justin whispered, before he moved off the bed and towards their ensuite bathroom to get ready for the night.

As Brian watched after him, he couldn't help but whisper to the disappearing form. “That's better than good.”

Chapter 28

“Luke? What are you doing here?” Ted frowned as he walked towards the lobby of Kinnetik, on his way back to his office after he had just finished a meeting. Everyone in their family knew that Luke had moved into Emmett's place and was angry with his fathers and the rest of the family, so to say that he was surprised to see Luke at Kinnetik of all places would be an understatement.

“I was looking for Dad,” Luke said, not really meeting Ted's eyes. “Maggie said he was in a meeting, but that I could wait in his office.”

Maggie was their receptionist and she knew to always let Brian's children and Justin into his office, no matter when or what the reason was. His family would always have access to Brian.

“Do you want me to get him?” Ted offered, looking at Luke on his crutches. Brian had told him about the foul at the game yesterday, so at least he wasn't surprised to see Luke with crutches.

“She said he was doing a presentation,” Luke said, slowly making his way towards Brian's office. “I'll just wait in his office.”

“You don't have to wait for him, Luke,” Ted said quietly. “I'll just get him. I am sure he wouldn't want you to wait.”

Luke shook his head. His voice was incredibly quiet when he replied. Ted could also hear a certain degree of nervousness in it. “No, it's okay. I am sure it's an important presentation if he's doing it himself.”

And Luke wasn't wrong about that. Everyone knew that by now Brian was only working on a few select accounts. Accounts that were either the biggest Kinnetik had or important ones that had been with them since the beginning. For other accounts Brian had his account execs and they would take care of the presentations.

“You know your Dad wouldn't mind. I am sure he would consider talking to you more important than any presentation.”

“It's fine. I'll just wait,” Luke said once more, this time more testily.

“Okay,” Ted nodded, holding up his hands in defeat. “Let me take your backpack and help you to his office,” he offered, reaching for the backpack Luke was carrying.

“It's fine,” Luke only replied, then made his way past Ted and to his father's office. For a minute Ted wasn't quite sure what to do, but Luke was his godson, he had loved the boy since he had been born and he knew that he owed him an apology, if not an explanation for his role in this whole mess. So after a minute of hesitation, he followed Luke into his father's office.

“Luke...”

Luke was sitting on the sofa in the office, carefully placing a pillow on the table and resting his foot on it. “Yeah?”

He could see that Luke wasn't really happy that he had followed him, but he needed to say his piece anyway.

“I just want you to know that I am really sorry about my part in this whole mess... I know it won't change anything, but I wish things had been different and... I really wish you hadn't been hurt by any of this.”

“Too late for that,” Luke just muttered as he pulled a notepad from his backpack. “I really don't want to talk about it.”

“I understand and I respect that. I just want you to know that I am really sorry and ... if you ever feel like talking about this or... anything else really... Blake and I will always be there for you. We love you. We always have.”

Luke nodded, knowing that Ted meant it. Ted had been his godfather and he had always taken his position really seriously. Luke had been taken on many trips by Ted and Blake over the years and he was really close with both men and even though he wouldn't admit it to them or anyone else right now, he missed family dinners and missed spending time with them.

Ted realised that Luke didn't really seem to feel like talking and accepted that. He turned around and made to leave Brian's office. “The presentation should be over in about 30 minutes. Are you sure you don't want me to get your Dad now?”

“I'll wait,” Luke just said, not even looking up from the notepad he was now writing on.

Ted nodded, then left the room with a sigh.

Luke continued working on his homework for the next 45 minutes until he heard some commotion outside his Dad's office. He could hear voices, but couldn't really make out what they were saying. He could hear though that one of the voices, his father's voice, seemed angry about something. Maybe it hadn't been the best idea to come by his office. What if the presentation had gone badly or there was another problem and his father would be too busy to talk to him?

A minute later his father stormed into the office, an angry expression on his face which immediately disappeared when his eyes settled on Luke. “I didn't expect to see you here,” he just stated as he slowly walked over and looked at his son from concerned eyes, the anger completely gone from his features now.

“I can leave if this is not a good time,” Luke said quietly, looking up at his father nervously. “You seem busy.”

“No, it's fine,” Brian said, still looking at Luke curiously. “I just wasn't expecting to see you here today,” he admitted.

“Maybe I should leave... You seemed angry out there,” Luke nodded towards the door of Brian's office, indicating the rest of Kinnetik. “I guess there's some trouble you need to take care of.”

Before he could get his leg off the table and his notepad back in his backpack, Brian had walked over to the other side of the table and stood across from Luke. “No...,” he ran a hand over his face, sighing in frustration. “It's nothing like that,” he explained. “You have been waiting here for 45 minutes?”

Luke frowned, not quite sure why that mattered, but nodded.

“That stupid idiot...,” Brian just muttered, shaking his head in anger.

Luke watched him and slowly got an idea why his father might be angry and who might be the person who had caused that anger.

“It's fine. I know you were in a presentation.”

“Who cares about the presentation?” Brian muttered, forcing himself to take a deep breath. “Ted said you told him not to get me?”

Luke nodded. “Yeah... It seemed important if you did it yourself. I was fine waiting. I started on my homework.”

“Who cares about the presentation?” Brian only said once more, looking at Luke closely. “Cynthia could have finished it.”

“Dad, it's fine,” Luke said once more, not quite sure why his father seemed so angry about the fact that no one had gotten him out of the presentation and that Luke had waited 45 minutes to see him.

“You shouldn't have had to wait 45 minutes to see me,” was all Brian muttered, before he finally moved over to the sofa and sat down on the armrest on the other side of the sofa, crossing his arms and looking at Luke expectantly. “I didn't expect you here,” he said once more, now a clear question in his eyes.

Luke could see that his father had finally calmed down for which he was glad. This conversation would be so much easier to have if his father was calm and not agitated. “I need to ask you something,” he said slowly, meeting his father's gaze head-on.

“Okay,” Brian nodded, indicating that he was listening.

“Why were you at the game yesterday?”

Brian frowned at him, seemingly confused by the question Luke had just asked him. “I always come to your games.”

“Yeah, but... why did you come yesterday?”

“Why not?” Brian asked, not sure if he understood what Luke was asking.

“Dad,” Luke sighed, trying to make his Dad understand what he was really asking. “Most fathers don't even come to our championship games, but you come to each and every one of them and... yesterday wasn't even a championship game. It was just a friendly. And... you knew I didn't want to talk to you...”

“I had no intention of talking to you,” Brian defended himself. “I wasn't even planning on you knowing that I was there, but then... you got injured, so...,” he shrugged. “I know you don't want to talk to me. To us.”

“Then why did you come?” Luke asked again.

Brian shrugged. “I always come to your games. To support you, to show you how proud I am of the player that you have become... That hasn't changed just because you're angry with me.”

“That's what Papa said,” Luke said quietly and Brian wasn't quite sure what to make of that comment.

“Does it bother you that I was there?” He asked next, not looking at Luke for fear of seeing the hatred he had verbally expressed before, in his eyes as well. “If you don't want me to come, I won't come to your next game,” he offered quietly.

Luke eyed him for the longest time, before he spoke again. “I don't think there will be any games for me for a while.”

Brian nodded and looked at Luke's ankle. Luke was probably right. He wouldn't play again before the Christmas break started and after Christmas there would be a winter break until it got warmer again and spring started. “How is your ankle?”

“It's okay. I wish everyone would stop acting like I am about to die. It's just a sprained ankle, not a gunshot wound to my stomach.”

“Emmett driving you crazy?” Brian just asked, raising an eyebrow at his son, not surprised when he nodded in response.

“I know he means well, but he's acting like I am an invalid.”

“He's only worried...,” Brian said quietly, then raised an eyebrow in question. “Do you want me to talk to him?”

“And say what? That I am an ungrateful bastard who doesn't appreciate all he's been doing for me in recent weeks?”

“He wouldn't think that,” Brian said, knowing that he was right. If told in a nice way, Emmett would surely understand that Luke hated being coddled like that.

“Well, he wouldn't be the first to think so,” Luke muttered, his eyes widening in surprise at what he had said and the fact that he had said it out loud.

“I am sure that's not what Jenny meant,” Brian said after an uncomfortable silence had settled between them, not quite sure how much he should reveal to Luke about the conversation he had had with Jenny about their argument.

“Well, that's what she said,” Luke muttered, then crossed his arms as well. “But I don't want to talk about it.”

“She has a very different perspective to yours. You can't blame her for that... Just like she can't blame you for having a different perspective to hers. Your childhoods... your experiences... they can't be compared at all. I think it's hard to judge someone for reacting differently than one might have just because they have had a different background and different experiences in their lives so far.”

When Luke didn't reply anything, Brian turned to look at him from curious eyes. “Why did you come here today, Luke?”

“I told you, I wanted to ask you that question,” Luke muttered, but didn't meet his father's gaze when he spoke.

“I know your father already gave you an answer to that question. So why are you really here?” Brian asked, his voice gentle and probing, not annoyed or angry like it had been earlier when he had come into the office.

When Luke looked up in surprise, Brian couldn't help but chuckle at his son's reaction. “Yeah, believe it or not, sometimes we actually talk. He told me about your conversation last night.”

Luke nodded, knowing that he shouldn't really have been surprised by that. Other than that, he stayed quiet and didn't react to his father's statement.

“Luke,” Brian sighed, looking at his son from sad eyes. “If there is anything you want to say or ask me... you know you can.”

Once again Luke stayed quiet, not looking at his father, but at his foot that was resting on the pillow on the table. It was clear that he was struggling with something.

“I promise to give you an honest reply,” Brian added quietly, hoping that it would make his son say or ask whatever was on his mind.

“Would you have ever told me the truth if Jenny's mother hadn't shown up?” Luke asked after the longest pause, still not looking at his father.

“Yes,” Brian said honestly, looking at his son anyway as he replied. “Your Papa and I always knew that we would have to tell you the truth one day and we always intended to do it. Maybe not right now, not the way it happened now, but we always knew that one day we would tell you the truth.”

Luke nodded slowly, letting the answer sink in. “When would you have told me?”

Brian eyed Luke, then shook his head. “I don't know. We didn't have a specific date in mind or a deadline by which we would have told you. I guess... when the time had felt right.”

“There would never have been a right time,” Luke muttered.

“I guess not, but still you deserve to know the truth.”

“If Papa hadn't come back from New York when he did... would you have ever told me the truth?” Luke now turned to look at his father, staring at him from angry eyes.

To his credit Brian didn't flinch under his son's anger, just taking it all in, knowing that he deserved it and so much more. “Yes, I would have.”

“Really?”

Brian nodded. “Yes... I have always told you about your father. I always told you about him, what kind of person he was, where he was... You knew his name. You knew his mother, your Grandma Jen. I knew that when you got older, you would have questions and that me saying he was in New York working on his career wouldn't be enough of an answer anymore. I always knew that and I always swore to myself that I would tell you the truth if you asked. If you had been older and had wanted to meet your Papa... I would have tried to arrange that. I never kept his identity from you because I never intended for you not to know him.”

“Would you have told him? If I wouldn't have said anything?” Luke held Brian's gaze as he asked the question.

“I don't know,” Brian answered honestly. “Maybe... maybe not... I guess it would have depended on the circumstances. If he had stayed in New York, hadn't returned to Pittsburgh... It's hard to say because he came back when you were five and things unfolded then. I don't know how our lives would have turned out if he hadn't come back then. I honestly can't say.”

“Didn't you feel bad about what you had done? Didn't you feel bad about keeping the truth from him, knowing that he was out there, that I was here and he had no idea about my existence?”

“Honestly? Not in the beginning,” Brian admitted, looking at Luke from pained eyes. “I know it sounds horrible, but... I was so convinced I had made the only choice possible for all of us. I was so convinced that I had done the right thing for him, for you... No, I didn't feel bad about it, but then... you were born and I got to see you grow up, I got to see you become this incredible boy with his own personality and the more I loved you and got to spend time with you, the more I knew that your Papa was missing out on all of that because of me and... I knew he would hate me if he ever found out the truth. And yes, there were moments where I started to question my own choice, but... by that time too much time had passed already and the damage would have been done already, so it seemed easier to just let things play out as they were.” Brian ran a hand through his hair. “I know it's not what you wanted to hear, but it's the honest answer.”

Luke nodded. His dad was right, it wasn't what he had wanted to hear, but he also knew it was honest. “Did you really think not knowing Papa would be best for me?”

“Luke... it was never about not knowing your father. It was about trapping him in a life I felt he wasn't ready for. He was still so young and... being tied down with a family at that age when he hadn't even finished his education, hadn't built a portfolio as an artist... I felt like he would start to feel trapped one day and would start to hate both you and me for trapping him in a life he hadn't really wanted.”

“But... he said... he said he always wanted a family with you and that you knew,” Luke accused, glaring at his father.

“Yes and I thought that he was too young to know what he really wanted, that he was too inexperienced and too naive to be able to make that decision at that age. I thought that I knew better than he did what he wanted from his life and... it's turned out to be the biggest mistake I ever made in my life. I should have just trusted him but I didn't and only trusted my own, messed-up mind.”

“So you didn't even give him a choice.”

“No, I didn't. Because I was an idiot and an ass and thought that I knew better what he wanted in his life than he did...the moment he set eyes on you, the moment he realised who you were and the pain of that realisation appeared on his face... I knew how wrong I had been and Luke, you have to believe me... I have regretted that decision ever since.”

Luke didn't say anything for the longest time, just hung on to his own thoughts and Brian let him.

“What if he hadn't forgiven you?”

Brian shrugged as he looked at his son sadly. “I guess we would have tried to raise you the best we could anyway. From the very first day we tried to make you our priority. Every decision your Papa made, every decision I made... we tried to make with your and Gus' best interest at heart. I don't know if that would have been enough, but I guess we would have tried to make it work that way... “

“But he forgave you,” Luke pointed out, his voice strangely void of emotions.

“Yes and I had honestly never expected that to happen. I knew that what I had done had been unforgivable... I knew the amount of pain I had caused him and you as well... I knew how hard raising you together with me was for him, so... no one was more surprised than me when he forgave me and... no one felt more undeserving of that forgiveness than me.”

“Weren't you happy that he had forgiven you and you had gotten away with it?”

Brian met Luke's gaze and shook his head. “No, not really. I was well aware of my part in all of this and for the longest time I blamed myself more than your Papa blamed me. He had forgiven me, but I couldn't forgive myself knowing that I had caused the people I loved most in my life so much pain. I just couldn't move on from that guilt and blame and... it took us a long time to work through that.”

“It's why you went to therapy?”

“Yes,” Brian nodded. “It's the main reason we went to therapy, the main reason I went to therapy. I just couldn't forgive myself and couldn't understand why your father would ever consider forgiving me after what I had done. I didn't feel like I deserved that forgiveness and I didn't know how to deal with his forgiveness and the knowledge that he still seemed willing to love me even after everything I had done.”

“Papa said that... going to therapy helped you both move on from what had happened.”

“It did,” Brian agreed. “I don't think we would be here today if we hadn't gone to therapy then. If we hadn't learned to talk about everything that had happened and more importantly why it happened and how to move on from it. I don't think we would have ever had Vicky or would have ever gotten married if we hadn't worked through everything back then. No-holds-barred, total honesty. We put everything on the table then and learned to face it all and as a consequence we learned to move on from it.”

“So it all worked out in the end,” Luke pointed out quietly.

“Yeah, I guess it did, but... Luke, that doesn't mean that I still don't regret to this day what happened. Yes, your Papa and I moved on, yes we learned how to deal with our past and how not to let it affect us more than necessary, but that doesn't mean I still don't have regrets over what happened. This will always be the biggest regret of my life and knowing that I have hurt you, Gus and your Papa in this way... that will always stay with me,” Brian said seriously.

“What I don't get,” Luke said quietly, looking at his father from clouded eyes, “is how you got everyone to go along with this. Why didn't anyone tell Papa the truth? Why didn't anyone tell him what was going on? Why did they all go along with your idea? I mean... Grandma Jen is his mother, not yours!”

“I didn't really give your grandma a choice,” Brian said calmly, clearly hearing the anger in Luke's voice. “She disagreed with my decision and she wanted to tell your Papa what was going on and... I threatened to take you away and to move away with you to a place where she couldn't find us. In the end, even though she knew that what she was doing was wrong, she went along with it because it meant that she could at least be a part of your life and make sure that you were alright.”

“But... if you had done that and she would have told Papa... he would have had rights, wouldn't he?” Luke frowned, not sure he really understood.

“Yes, he would have, but at the time your grandma didn't think that far. I think she was just too scared to lose contact with her grandchild and maybe... deep down... she also felt that your Papa was too young to have a family... I don't know, you'll have to ask her. All I know is that she has also felt incredibly guilty about what has happened and it took her and your Papa a long time to move on from that and to learn to trust each other again.”

“I guess I get Grandma Debbie,” Luke said quietly. “She was always your surrogate mother and probably felt that her alliance should be with you and not Papa,” Luke mused only to be interrupted by his Dad.

“It's not that easy,” Brian said slowly. “She loved your Papa. She always did from the very first time she saw him. She felt responsible for him and loved him like he was another son. You know that he lived with her for some time when he was younger and they were always close. When she chose to keep my secret... it didn't have anything to do with her loving me more or her alliance lying with me and not your Papa.”

“Then why did she go along with it? Did she think you were right?” Luke asked angrily.

“It had to do with her own past,” Brian explained calmly. “When she got pregnant with her son... She never told the father either. She knew that they didn't have a future and that he didn't want to be tied down to a life in Pittsburgh, hell, that he didn't even want to be tied down to a life with a woman... She never told him that she was pregnant and having his child and when I was in that situation, she didn't feel like she had any right to judge me when she had done exactly the same to the father of her child.”

“What do you mean he didn't want to be tied down to a life with a woman?” Luke frowned, then his face started to show understanding. “Oh my God, she got pregnant by a gay man?”

“And a drag queen to boot,” Brian nodded.

Luke couldn't help himself and had to laugh. “Really? Only Grandma Deb would...And she didn't know?”

Brian shrugged. “I don't know all the details. Maybe she had a feeling that he wasn't really all that into her... maybe she knew that he was just trying to have sex with a woman to see if he would like it... In any case, she knew that he wasn't made for a life with a family in Pittsburgh.”

“But, if Papa lived with her and everything... she must have known that he wanted to have a family with you, right?” Luke frowned as he turned serious again.

“While she didn't do anything to stop our relationship, I don't think she was really all too happy about it either. I know she thought your Papa was too young for me and that I was a bad influence on him... I think she felt that he could do better than me and back then, I can't say that she would have been wrong...I guess she was happy enough while we were together, but she wasn't really sad either when your Papa moved to New York, away from me. I think back then your grandmas wouldn't have been too sad if he had found a nice 20-something student in New York and had started going out with him instead.”

“Because of the person you were back then?”

Brian nodded. “I am not going to lie to you, Luke. I was a bad influence on your father. Considering his age... considering my age... I can't blame them for having problems with our relationship and back then it wasn't even so much a relationship as me keeping him around because he was in love with me and I liked the attention. Or so they thought... I don't think they really understood our relationship and I don't blame them, I mean... we didn't and we were in it. It was a different time then, almost a different life. Things were not like they are now. Your Papa and I didn't have the same relationship we have now and I guess to people on the outside... it must have looked weird. And to be fair, we broke up not too long before he left for New York because he himself wasn't happy with our relationship or lack thereof.”

“Papa told me that he loved you even back then because he could see the real you, because he knew the person that you really were on the inside and... Emmett said that Papa always told him that you were different with him than you were with Emmett or your friends and that they just didn't know you as well as he did...”

“And I guess he was right,” Brian smiled benignly. “Your Papa could always see right through me. He always knew me better than anyone else, even people that had been in my life for twenty years at that point. He had this ability to see right through my bullshit and more than that, to call me out on it. And it scared me shitless.”

“Because you weren't ready to admit that you loved him?” Luke frowned.

“No, I wasn't... I knew that I cared about him and that he meant a lot to me, but I was scared shitless of how much and I thought if I admitted to him how much he really meant to me... it would only give him a chance to hurt me, that admitting that I loved him would make me weak. That's bullshit, but at the time... I didn't know better,” Brian admitted.

“Because of your childhood,” Luke stated more than asked. It was clear that he was putting together what everyone had told him so far.

“I had never known real love until I had met your father and Gus was born and then, when they both loved me... I didn't know how to deal with that... I was a different person back then, Luke and I had no idea about love because I had never experienced love in my life. Yes, I had friends, yes there were people who told me they loved me, but... those people... They always wanted something in return and it always felt like I only got their love if I did something for them in return and your Papa and Gus were the first people who loved me and didn't expect anything in return and I had no idea how to deal with that. It threw me and I was scared of it... Your Papa has the patience of a saint. He stayed with me even though I was that emotionally damaged and he just accepted it as a part of me. He never tried to change me even though I know he would have liked some changes, but he just loved me, accepted me as I was, all faults included and still loved me. I had no idea how to deal with that until much later...”

“When Gus and I lived with you?”

“Yes, that helped a lot because it taught me a lot about love and more importantly unconditional love, but it was also the time I went to see a therapist for the first time and that therapist really helped me work through some of my childhood trauma and some of the reasons why I was so scared of being loved and even more scared of loving back...”

“Have you ever confronted your parents about the way they raised you? About your childhood?” Luke asked, curiousity all over his face.

“My father passed away a long time ago when Gus was still a baby... And my mother... she's too caught up in her bible to really care what I think about her. She'd be too busy condemning me to hell for my sinful lifestyle than to even listen to a word I had to say to her,” Brian said quietly.

“Is that why we never met her?” Luke asked and saw his dad frown at him in confusion. “I mean, she is my grandma, isn't she?” He added.

“I guess, but... she's someone I wouldn't wish on anyone. You're better off not knowing her. Trust me,” Brian just muttered, looking around the room as he spoke. “She'd only throw bible verses at you, telling you about how your Papa and I are bound to go straight to hell for being gay and then she'd probably be dragging you to the next church to get you baptised right away and to pray for your soul.” Brian turned to look at Luke, meeting his gaze. “You're better off with the grandmas you have, believe me.”

Luke only nodded. “Sounds like it.”

A silence settled over the room and neither really knew what to say. It was Brian who broke the silence, his voice quiet and serious when he spoke next.

“Luke... Your Papa and I want to respect your wishes and... if you don't want to see us, we will respect that. I just hope that one day... we might be able to work through this, like your Papa and I worked through this and I want you to know... I'll do whatever I can to fix this for you. If there's anything I can do...just tell me and I will do it. I hate knowing that I have caused you pain and I hate knowing that I hurt you when all I ever wanted was for you to be happy and... if there's anything I can do to make this easier on you, you can tell me. And... if you think that maybe a therapist would help or... I don't know... talking to someone who knows more about this than we do... I won't say no. I will do whatever it takes to fix this.”

Luke looked at his father and saw the sincerity in his eyes. “I know, Dad. Thanks...”

Brian nodded, knowing that there wasn't much more he could offer at this point.

Another silence settled in the room and this time Luke broke it. “I should probably head off now. It's getting late and I still have homework to do...”

Brian nodded, getting up from his seat on the armrest. “Let me take you back to Emmett's.”

“I am fine, Dad.”

“You shouldn't be getting on a bus or into a taxi with that ankle of yours. I can just drop you off at his place.”

“Okay,” Luke acquiesced, seeing how important this seemed to his father. “But you really don't have to. I know you must be busy here.”

“Not too busy to drop you off at Emmett's,” Brian immediately responded, walking over to the coat rack next to the door and picking up his winter coat. “Never too busy for you,” he said quietly, his voice hardly louder than a whisper.

Luke had still heard him though and nodded slowly as he got his things. “Thanks, Dad.”

They made their way to the car and Brian headed in the direction of Emmett's place. Luke was silent and seemed deep in thought until he suddenly turned towards his father. “Do you think you can drop me off at Grandma Deb's instead?”

Brian frowned, but nodded. “Sure.”

He turned in the direction of Debbie's house at the next corner and heard Luke's quiet voice as he headed down the road towards her place.

“I think I should talk to Jenny... Apologise to her for our fight on Friday.”

“I am sure she would appreciate that,” Brian said, not quite sure what else he should say. Yes, he and Luke had talked, but he knew that it had just been a first conversation and they were still a long way from being back to their normal relationship and whatever was going on between Luke and Jenny was between them.

“Do you know if her mom has been in contact with her since then?” Luke asked, turning towards his father and looking at him from sad eyes.

“I don't think so. I know she left without another word on Friday. Ted tried to talk to her, but she wasn't really ready to have a conversation and when Jenny was over for family dinner on Sunday, she hadn't heard anything,” he replied honestly.

“That sucks...,” Luke muttered.

“Well, you don't know her mother,” Brian muttered, then turned serious immediately. “I know that despite what happened, Jenny still loves her mother and I am sure it's not easy for her to be ignored by her like this even though she is probably not surprised.”

“How can she care so little? She's Jenny's mother...”

“Some people should have never been parents... they will always care more about themselves than the well-being of their children,” Brian said quietly. “Which is unfair towards the children, because they never had a choice in the matter. They didn't get to decide if they wanted to be born into that family or not.”

Luke nodded, knowing that his father was right and also knowing that his father had most likely also been talking about his own family as well. He hadn't had a choice when he had been born into his family and had been raised by two alcoholics, one beating him, the other treating him with indifference and religious righteousness.

As they pulled up in front of Debbie's house, Luke turned towards his father. “Thanks, Dad!”

“It was just a short drive. Nothing to thank me for.”

“No, I mean for...,” Luke stopped, not really sure what he wanted to say. “Just thanks,” he then ended and Brian nodded, having understood even though Luke hadn't been able to put his emotions into words.

Brian had understood that Luke had thanked him for never having been a parent like that.

“Your Papa and I love you, Luke. No matter what, okay?”

Luke nodded, then got out of the car. He got his backpack from the backseat, then made his way up to the door.

Brian watched after him for a few seconds and when he saw him disappear into the house, he slowly drove off. “I love you, sonny boy.”

Chapter 29

“Luke, what are you doing here?” Carl frowned, looking up from his seat on the sofa when he heard the front door open and saw his grandson come in on his crutches.

“Is Jenny in?” Luke asked, looking at his grandfather.

“She is, she's upstairs in her room working on her homework,” Carl replied, getting up from the sofa and walking over to where Luke was standing. “How is your ankle? Your Papa called to tell us you got hurt.”

Luke rolled his eyes, not really surprised that the family grapevine had worked once again. “It's just a sprained ankle. I am fine. It's nothing serious.”

“That's good,” Carl nodded, then looked at Luke closely. “And apart from that ankle... Are you okay, son?”

Luke met Carl's gaze and shrugged.

“You know that Debbie and I are here when you're ready to talk to us. Whatever you have to say or ask... we'll both be here, Luke.”

Luke nodded, then looked around the house, obviously surprised that he hadn't been hugged to death by his grandma yet. “Grandma Debbie not in?”

Carl shook his head. “She's at her weekly PFLAG meeting.”

Luke nodded, thinking to himself that it was probably for the best that she wasn't in. After the afternoon he had had and the conversation with his father earlier, he wasn't quite sure if he could have dealt with her and really, he had come to see Jenny, not his grandparents. It just so happened that Jenny now lived with them.

“Do you mind if I go up and speak to Jenny?” Luke asked, nodding towards what he knew was her room.

“I can call her down, that way you won't have to go up the stairs with your crutches,” Carl offered, but wasn't surprised when Luke shook his head.

“I'll be fine. I am not an invalid.”

“Alright, go on then, son,” Carl said, recognizing so much of Brian in that statement that it was almost eerie. And just like with Brian, he knew better than to force Luke into a conversation he obviously didn't want to have.

Luke nodded, then made his way up the stairs to Jenny's room. He knocked and waited for her to let him enter. When he heard her voice a few seconds later, he shifted around a bit with his crutches until he was able to open the door.

He could see the surprise on her face when she saw him. It was obvious by the headphones on her head that she hadn't been aware of his conversation with Carl and hadn't known that he was the one that wanted to see her. Her surprise immediately changed to anger when she realised who it was.

“What are you doing here?”

“I wanted to talk to you,” Luke started, nodding towards the room she was in. “Can I come in?”

Jenny shrugged, then nodded slowly.

Luke made his way into the room and plopped down on her bed. He took off his backpack and his jacket, then looked at Jenny from apologetic eyes. “I am sorry.”

“What exactly are you sorry for?” She asked, clearly not impressed by his apology so far.

“I am sorry for my behaviour on Friday. I know that it was an emotional day for you and... I made it all about me when really, it should have been about you. I am sorry we fought and that I made you angry,” he said, looking at her from sad eyes.

Jenny just shrugged. “Shit happens.”

Luke could hear a certain coldness in her voice and he didn't like it. “I am sorry you cancelled the family celebration to spend time with me and that I reacted the way I did... It's just... this last week and a half haven't been easy for me either. It's not an excuse, but I hope that you might take pity on me... and then there's my ankle, so... another pity point, right?” He looked up at her from what could best be described as puppy dog eyes and she couldn't help but laugh even though she still felt slightly angry with him.

“Grandma told me you got injured at your game yesterday,” Jenny just said, meeting Luke's gaze.

“Yeah, it was a stupid foul. Thankfully, it is just a sprained ankle and nothing is broken or torn.”

“That's good,” Jenny agreed, looking at Luke. “So as far as pity points go, it's not really much to feel sorry for, huh?”

Luke shrugged. “I guess not, but I am an eternal optimist, so it was worth a try.”

Jenny smiled, shaking her head in amusement. “You came here to apologise, so I guess you definitely deserve points for that.”

“I am sorry. I... know I didn't act like it on Friday, but... I know I was an ass and... I am sorry I ruined your day.”

Now it was Jenny's turn to shrug. “I still made it in time for dessert, so it wasn't a total waste.”

“That's good,” Luke said quietly. He shifted uncomfortably, before he spoke again. “Have you heard from your mom since then?”

Luke could see how Jenny's body tensed and his heart broke for his friend when he saw her shake her head. “No.”

“I am sorry, Jenny.”

“Why? It's not like she cared much before...”

“Maybe not, but...you deserve a lot better than that from her and I am sorry she treats you like this.”

“It's nothing I am not used to,” Jenny said quietly, though Luke knew that she was merely acting like she didn't care. He could easily hear the pain in her voice. And he felt sorry for her and the pain she had to be in when it wasn't even her fault.

“Still,” he said quietly. “I can't imagine what it must feel like... Nobody should be treated like that.”

Jenny shrugged. “I am not the only child to ever make it through something like this... And I have a family now, so... that's something to be happy about.”

Luke knew that she was right. Just looking at his own family, his fathers, his brother, many of his uncles had been abandoned by their parents and had been treated badly by them in the past. No, Jenny wasn't the only child this had ever happened to, but that still didn't make it any better in his opinion.

“I am glad you found a family here,” he said, then looked up to meet her gaze. “They are a good family and I know that they love you and will always have your back.”

Jenny looked surprised by that statement. “That's not what you said on Friday,” she pointed out.

“I know,” Luke sighed. “I was angry at my dads and... everyone really and... I let that anger get the best of me. Instead of supporting you, I was an ass, but... they are a good family. And I know they love you. You should have seen how worried everyone was about us fighting...”

“What do you mean?” Jenny now frowned.

“Well, my dads... Emmett... They certainly tried to make me see your side as well,” Luke started, then stopped when he saw the confusion on Jenny's face.

“How would Emmett know anything about our fight? I only told your Dad.”

Luke shook his head slowly. “I guess you're not used to what they call the gay grapevine yet. No matter what happens in this family, everyone will know about it within ten minutes. There are no secrets in this family,” he took a deep breath before he continued, “My Dad told Emmett, so he could check on me and see if I was okay. And I guess he also told my Papa because... that's what they do. They tell each other everything and from there... it probably just took five minutes until everyone knew. Just look at my ankle. You didn't even seem surprised to see me on crutches and I only injured it last night.”

“Grandma told me,” Jenny repeated her earlier statement. “I have no idea though how she would have found out.”

Luke shrugged. “Grandpa said that Papa called her today... But she could have also heard from Grandma Jen or my Dad or God knows who... You never know... it's just one of those things in this family.”

Jenny nodded, seemingly accepting that statement.

“You'll get used to it,” Luke chuckled when he saw Jenny's face.

“So... you've been talking to your dads?” Jenny asked, raising an eyebrow in question.

“Yeah,” Luke nodded. “My Dad was at the game and he was the one who took me to the hospital to get my ankle checked which means that my Papa also knew and immediately showed up at Emmett's to make sure that I was okay.”

“That's nice,” Jenny said.

Luke shrugged. “I guess.”

“They really care,” Jenny said quietly, turning her gaze away from Luke and towards her hands. “It's obvious how much they both love you.”

Luke stayed quiet for a while, then nodded. “I know...”

“I mean... your Dad came to your game when you're not even talking to him... My mom couldn't even be bothered when things were okay between us. She never showed up for anything...”

“I am sorry, Jenny,” Luke said quietly, knowing better than to point out that he hadn't asked for his dad to be at the game. “You would have deserved a better mom.”

“Well, it is what it is. No point crying about it.”

“You know that from now on you'll never be alone again at a game or play or whatever you'll do... You'll have at least ten people show up to support you at everything you will do if that's what you want.”

“I wouldn't go that far,” Jenny said quietly.

“You don't know this family,” Luke said firmly. “Once you're part of the family, you'll never get rid of them. Believe me, I've tried,” he tried to joke, though the joke fell rather flat.

Jenny raised her head to look at him. “I don't think I want to. I really appreciate them and everything they've done for me and how nice everyone has been.”

“I know and... I know that I should probably be more appreciative of them, but right now... it's not that easy.”

Jenny nodded, knowing that now it was her turn to apologise as well. “I am sorry for what I said on Friday. I know you and your dads and everyone have problems and... it was wrong for me to act like that didn't matter.”

“You have a right to your opinion and I guess... we are coming from very different backgrounds where parents are concerned. If I had grown up the way you did... maybe I would have felt the same if someone had acted the way I did, but... we're not coming from the same background and I guess I should have been more accepting of where you were coming from.”

“Yeah, I guess I shouldn't have dismissed your feelings like that either,” Jenny agreed. “It just made me so angry to see that...,” she stopped, then seemed to force herself to go on,”you obviously have parents that love you so much and instead of being grateful for that, you just seemed not to care, but... I get that that wasn't really fair under the current circumstances with everything going on.”

“So, I guess we're both sorry, huh?” Luke asked, smiling slightly as he met Jenny's gaze. “Can we just forget about it and move on?”

Jenny smiled as well, then nodded. “Yeah, I think we can.”

Jenny made her way over to the bed as well and sat down next to Luke. She allowed him to hug her and hugged him back. “I didn't like fighting with you,” she said quietly while he was still holding her.

“Neither did I,” Luke agreed, before he let go of her.

“So...you and your Dads?” Jenny asked him as she looked at him with a question in her eyes.

Luke shrugged. “I talked to both of them, but... it's not like everything is okay again or anything...”

Jenny nodded, her eyes full of understanding. “But it's a beginning that you talked, right?”

“I guess,” Luke agreed. “I mean... you are right. They obviously love me and I guess some of the things you said on Friday were also right. I spoke to both of them about what the alternative would have been if they hadn't worked things out back then and... I guess none of that would have been as good as what they...what we have now, but... it doesn't change the fact that they lied to me. That my Dad lied to my Papa...”

“No, it doesn't, but it's up to you to decide if that's something you can forgive him for one day or not,” Jenny said quietly.

“It just feels like I don't have a choice. My Papa forgave him, Gus also forgave him and the rest of my family was in on it... How would it make me look if I didn't?” Luke muttered.

Jenny shrugged. “I don't think you should worry about that. I don't think your Dad would want you to forgive him just because you felt like you had to. I think he would want you to do what felt right to you, no matter what that might be in the end.”

“He seems really sorry,” Luke said quietly, looking at the hands in his lap. “Like he really regrets what happened.”

“I don't doubt it,” Jenny said, taking one of Luke's hands and giving it a squeeze. “It's obvious how much he loves your Papa, how much he loves you and your siblings and... I guess it can't be easy to live with the knowledge that he has hurt the people he loves the most. He basically failed on the one promise he made to himself and to the people he loves: That he would never hurt you like he has been hurt by his parents. How can he not regret that?”

“I guess,” Luke muttered. “It's just so hard to... to just ignore what happened...”

“I don't think anyone wants you to ignore it,” Jenny said. “Moving on from something painful and ignoring it are not the same.”

“I guess I haven't really figured out the difference yet,” Luke admitted, hanging his head. “To me moving on seems like ignoring what happened.”

“Maybe you just need to give it more time then,” Jenny suggested. “It's not been that long since you found out and you only started talking to your Dad again... Maybe this needs more time and can't be rushed.”

“Yeah, maybe... it's just that... I don't want things to stay like this forever,” Luke admitted on a whisper, his voice very low. When he looked up to meet Jenny's eyes, she could see tears in his own. “I hate how things are now and...I miss them...I don't want to because I am angry with them, but I do... I miss them and... I miss Vicky and... I just wish they would have never told me and things could have stayed the way they were before...”

“It might feel that way now, but I think in the long run... you'll be glad that you know the truth. And... I guess it only hurts so much because you love them just as much as they love you. And why wouldn't you? They have been good fathers to you. Even now they are still there for you, supporting you in whatever you do, whenever you need them... I don't blame you for missing that...”

Luke nodded as he leaned his head on her shoulder and started crying quietly. Jenny let him, knowing that he probably needed to let go of his emotions.

“Just give it time and only do what feels comfortable to you... don't rush things because you feel you have to... You know your fathers would be the last people to want you to do anything that wouldn't feel comfortable to you. If you want to talk to them, talk to them. If you don't, don't! Just go with what feels right to you.”

Luke nodded, then tried to get himself back under control. After several minutes, he raised his head and looked up at Jenny. “Sorry... I made it all about myself once more when really... you have enough shit on your own to deal with.”

“Don't worry. It makes for a nice distraction from my own problems. What's the point in constantly wishing for something I know will never happen... I wish things with my mom were different, but after so many years of her basically ignoring me, I can't really say that I am even surprised...”

“That doesn't mean it doesn't hurt,” Luke said quietly, now taking Jenny's hand and giving it a squeeze.

“Yeah, it does, but... I try to focus on the good, you know? On my new family here. My new life here...”

Luke nodded, once again impressed by the strength Jenny showed through all of this. “Just know that you can also talk to me if you want to. I don't want you to think that you can't.”

“I know,” Jenny smiled. “I know.”

Luke nodded, then nodded towards the desk where Jenny had been working on her homework. “Have you heard anything about your new school yet?”

“I will start tomorrow,” Jenny said, sitting up straighter. “Grandma and Grandpa took me to the school yesterday to enroll me and I will start tomorrow.”

“So, what's with the homework? Is it still for your old school?” Luke frowned.

Jenny chuckled. “Yeah...and no, I don't know why I am still doing it. It just felt wrong not to finish the assignment for some reason...”

“That's crazy,” Luke laughed. “You're not even a student there anymore. Why care about the homework assignments they gave you?”

“That's what Gus said as well,” Jenny chuckled. “I don't know. It just felt wrong not to finish it and I guess... it won't do any harm to stay in the subject matter, will it?”

“You're crazy,” Luke shook his head in amusement.

“Yeah, so I've heard,” Jenny agreed with a smile.

“How about I save you from yourself and we go and watch a movie instead?” Luke suggested, his voice suddenly sounding nervous again. He didn't know why, Jenny had said she was okay with moving on from their argument, but Luke guessed he still wasn't sure if they were really okay.

“Sounds good. In fact it sounds a lot more tempting than that French essay,” Jenny said, smiling at Luke.

Ten minutes later they had gotten Carl to give them a ride to the movie theatre and were on their way.

Chapter 30

Justin was just clearing the table and cleaning up after breakfast when he heard his phone ring. He frowned, not really expecting a call. Brian and Vicky had just left for the day. Brian would drop her off at school, then head into Pittsburgh to get some work done for the day.

It was supposed to be a quiet Wednesday and he had nothing on his schedule, so he was confused that someone would call him that early in the morning.

He picked up his phone and was even more confused when he saw Luke's image on his screen, indicating that his son was calling.

Brian had told him about their conversation at the office yesterday and Debbie had called later in the evening to let them know that things between Jenny and Luke seemed okay again and they were out to watch a movie.

He just hoped that everything was alright. As far as he was concerned Luke should be on his way to school now.

“Hey, is everything okay?” He therefore started the conversation, immediately worrying that something might be wrong.

“Hi Papa,” Luke greeted and as far as Justin was concerned, he sounded okay. So far so good.

“Hey,” Justin greeted back rather sheepishly, admitting to himself that he might have jumped to the wrong conclusions. Luke sounded fine and it wasn't that weird for him to call his father, was it? Well, maybe not, but under the current circumstances...

“Uhm,” Luke started, obviously feeling rather nervous about what he wanted to say.

Justin immediately felt his own nervousness rise and forced himself not to jump to conclusions again and to stay calm. “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, uhm... I was just wondering... uhm...Would you be home in the afternoon?”

Justin frowned, not quite sure what to make of that question. “Yeah, I think so. Why?”

“Uhm... I need some stuff for a project and... I was wondering if I could come by after school to...uhm... pick it up.”

“Of course you can,” Justin immediately replied. “You know you can always come by.”

“Okay, that's good,” Luke said in response, obviously still quite nervous.

“Do you want me to pick you up from school?” Justin offered, but wasn't really surprised when Luke declined the offer.

“I'll just take the bus home.”

“I just thought with your ankle and all,” Justin pointed out, but stopped when he heard Luke reply.

“It's fine. I always use the bus. I'll be fine using it today.”

“Okay,” Justin agreed, before he cursed. “Shit!”

“Papa?” Luke obviously seemed confused and hadn't expected that.

“I am sorry, honey. I just remembered that Vicky has rehearsals for her Christmas play today and I offered to pick her up afterwards.” Justin could have cursed himself for having forgotten about that. “She seemed so excited about the rehearsal and I know she'll be ready to talk my ear off the minute she gets into the car.”

Luke actually had to chuckle then. “I have no doubt.” He knew his sister well and knew that his father was not exaggerating.

“You know what? I'll ask your Dad if he can pick her up, so I'll be home when you come by.”

“Don't worry about it, Papa. I have my key. I can let myself into the house,” Luke said.

“I know, I just thought...,” Justin started, but then stopped, not quite sure how to continue.

“I was thinking,” Luke started, hearing the insecurity in his father's voice. “Maybe... I could stay for dinner, if it's alright with you and Dad. I think Vicky might enjoy that.”

Justin smiled, nodding to himself even though Luke couldn't see it. “That sounds lovely, Luke. I would really enjoy that, too.”

“Uhm, okay. I better go now, we're almost at school. I'll see you later.”

“Yeah, see you later,” Justin agreed, before he hung up, feeling ridiculously excited about the fact that Luke would come home this afternoon and stay for dinner. It wasn't a momentous step, it wasn't anything big, but the fact that Luke had asked if he could stay for dinner, was a small step in the right direction and at this point Justin would take whatever he could get and whatever his son was ready to offer to them.

***

Luke threw his backpack and jacket onto his bed, then hobbled through his room. He looked around and took in things he hadn't really paid attention to in years. Like the pictures on the wall. Pictures of himself with various family members on various occasions. With his fathers, with Gus and Vicky, with his uncles and grandparents.

He remembered how it had all started with one picture of his family when he had been small and scared of monsters under his bed. He remembered how his Dad had told him that his Papa had been scared of monsters as well when he had been younger and that his Grandma had put a picture of his happy family next to his bed, so the monsters would stay away as they were scared of happy families.

He couldn't help but laugh at how naive he had been back then to actually believe that story. It had been utter bullshit, but he had indeed stopped being scared of monsters. And even though he hadn't believed in monsters under his bed in a long time, he had always kept pictures of loved ones around and at one point had started putting them on the wall of his room. After every holiday, every vacation, every trip, he would add new pictures to his wall, just enjoying the happy memories the pictures brought back to the front of his mind when he looked at them.

Luke took in several of the pictures and couldn't help but smile as his eyes settled on an old one from when he had still been a small boy. It must have been taken on their holiday to Disneyworld and it showed him, Gus and his fathers happily posing for a picture with Mickey Mouse. Now that he thought back to it, he remembered that it was the first vacation they had taken together after his Papa had come back from New York.

He looked at the happy smiles on their faces and remembered how happy he had been on that trip. Mostly because it had been Disneyworld and what five year old wouldn't love that, but looking at it now, he couldn't help but be amazed by how happy his fathers looked as well.

At the time he hadn't been aware of everything they had been through, but now that he knew, it amazed him that they looked truly happy. As they all did in all of the pictures. Pictures where his dad was carrying him on his back and he was holding on like a crazy monkey, pictures where he was cuddling with his Papa, pictures where he and Gus were playing in the ocean.

He moved on to the newer pictures, pictures that now also included Vicky and he smiled when he saw a picture of himself holding her when she had still been a little baby. He remembered that it was the first day he had been allowed to meet her and actually hold her and how excited he had been to see his baby sister after only hearing about her and seeing images of her for so long.

Looking at the image, he couldn't help but move on to the next which was an image of him lying in his parents' bed, cuddled close to his father. They were both sleeping and by the lack of hair on his father's head he knew that this was taken when his dad had been going through his chemo for his lung cancer. They both looked so peaceful as they were sleeping.

He ran a hand over the picture, not able to stop the emotions that picture brought to him. At the time he had been so scared. He had been so young and hadn't really understood all about cancer and chemotherapies, but he had understood how seriously ill his Dad had been and that he could have died and he still remembered how scared he had been of his father dying. He remembered the many nights when he had been sad about his Dad being so sick that he couldn't get out of bed and how his Papa had held him, had told him stories and had always stayed positive for him, had always managed to somehow push away his fears and to calm him down and make him less scared of what was going on.

It had been a scary time, but he also remembered how both his fathers had always been there to comfort him whenever he had gotten really scared.

He moved on to more pictures of more recent holidays. Pictures of him and Vicky throwing snowballs at Gus on their skiing trip two years ago, pictures of him, Vicky and their Papa building a snowman. He laughed when he saw a picture of Christmas three years ago and Vicky wearing a ridiculous elf costume that Emmett had gotten her and that she had been in love with. She had insisted on wearing it for days and had thrown a tantrum every time their dads had tried to dress her in something else.

Which reminded him of the Elsa dress Emmett had gotten him when he had been into Frozen as a small boy and how he had loved wearing it, even though his Dad had made fun of him at the time. He remembered how angry he had been because he had loved the dress and hadn't cared at the time that it was really a dress for girls and not boys. He had loved it and had wanted to wear it and he remembered how his Papa had let him wear it whenever he wanted.

So many memories, most of them happy and good. He stood and stared at the images for almost twenty minutes, before he pulled himself away.

He slowly made his way out of his room and was on his way downstairs to the kitchen when he passed the master bedroom. The door was open and he couldn't help but look inside. As he saw the bed, he couldn't help but remember so many mornings he had spent in that bed talking to his Dad when his Papa had still been asleep.

His Dad had always been up early and had always talked to him, no matter how early he had been up and had kept him entertained until Gus and his Papa would wake up as well and they could have breakfast together.

As he stared at the bed, he couldn't help but smile as he remembered so many lazy mornings, so many weekends and holidays that he had spent in that bed with his fathers. So many nights when he had been small and sick or scared after a nightmare. Nights when his dads would let him sleep in the big bed with them even though they usually had a strict “no child in our bed at night”-policy and even though he and Gus had always been expected to sleep in their own beds. But sometimes... when they had been sick or scared, his dads would make exceptions and he remembered the nights being cuddled between them, being held and cared for by them.

He was taken back from his thoughts when he heard the main door of the house and heard Vicky's excited chatter as she was talking to her father. His Papa had been right, she was talking his ear off about the rehearsal. Luke couldn't help but smile as he heard her happy voice and decided to make her even happier by announcing his presence.

Thirty seconds later a loud squeal rang through the house when Vicky saw their surprise visitor and immediately started running towards Luke, who was just coming down the stairs.

“Hey, slowly. You know he's injured,” Justin admonished when she was almost about to run right into him.

At the last second she stopped and slowed down a bit, carefully looking up at her big brother who was now standing in front of her with a smile. “Sorry!”

“It's okay,” Luke smiled, not wanting her to feel bad. He actually felt quite happy to see how excited she seemed to see him. “We just need to be mindful of the crutches. Come here.”

He then carefully navigated the crutches, so she could come closer and give him a careful hug.

“I missed you!” She immediately said as she threw her arms around his waist, holding him close.

“I missed you, too,” Luke gave back, holding her close. “How was your rehearsal?”

“It was good! I am going to be a star. I have a really nice costume that Papa helped make for me.”

“I can't wait to see it,” Luke said with a big smile.

“It's at school, but you can see it when you come to my Christmas play. You will come, right?”

“Of course. I wouldn't miss it for the world,” Luke promised, smiling at the happy squeal that came out of his little sister.

“Did you hear, Papa? Luke will come to my play.”

“Yeah, I heard,” Justin smiled, looking from his daughter to his son and back. “And even if I hadn't, your reaction would have told me as much.”

She excitedly hopped from one foot to the other, a big smile on her face.

“Come on, let's get you out of your jacket.”

She nodded, then made her way over to her Papa who helped her get out of her winter clothes.

“How about we all have some nice hot cocao together? I think we even have some cookies left from the batch we made last weekend,” Justin said, nodding towards the kitchen.

Both Vicky and Luke nodded and they all made their way into the kitchen.

Justin couldn't help listening as his kids were talking and his heart contracted when he heard Vicky ask Luke if he was now back home and was going to stay.

“I'll stay for dinner tonight,” Luke said, trying to sound as happy as he could.

“But you're not staying here? With me and Papa and Daddy?” Vicky looked at him sadly, her face showing very clearly how much she disliked the idea of him leaving again.

“No, not yet. I can't, Vicky,” Luke said quietly, very aware that his father was actually listening to their conversation. “I am sorry. I'll go back to Auntie Em's tonight.”

“Why don't you stay with us? This is your home. We are your family. Don't you love us anymore?” Vicky asked, her voice sounding dangerously close to crying.

“Of course I love you,” Luke immediately replied, pulling his little sister close. “I love you very, very much. You know that!”

“We talked about this, Vicky,” Justin said quietly, knowing that it wasn't really fair to leave Luke to answer those questions on his own. “You know that Luke needs to stay with Auntie Em for a while until things are better again between all of us.”

“But you're here now,” Vicky said, looking at her brother, clearly not understanding how that didn't mean that things were okay again.

“And we're very happy about that, all of us,” Justin agreed, coming over and giving her a hug as well. “I know it's not easy to understand for you, princess, but for now Luke will stay with Auntie Em and he will come and visit us when he feels like it.”

“Are you still angry with Daddy? Because he's sorry,” Vicky said, directed at her brother. “He told me that he's sorry. Didn't he tell you?”

“Yeah, he did,” Luke admitted, looking at Vicky from sad eyes. “But it's not that easy. I am sorry, Vicky.”

“Daddy said it's complicated,” Vicky said sadly, looking from her brother to her Papa and back. “I don't like complicated.”

“I know,” Justin said sadly, running a hand through her blond hair. “No one does, but sometimes it can't be helped. Why don't we stop being sad and just enjoy the fact that Luke is here now and will stay for dinner? Be happy about that, huh?”

Vicky eyed him for a couple of seconds, before she finally nodded. “Okay.”

“Okay,” Justin agreed, smiling at his daughter. He then moved back to prepare the hot cocao for all of them. He left Luke and Vicky to continue with their conversation until he returned a few minutes later with the cookies and hot cocao. By the time he returned, he was glad to see both Vicky and Luke smiling.

***

“Can I help you?” Luke asked as he looked up at Justin who was getting vegetables out of the fridge, clearly ready to begin preparing dinner.

They had had their cocao and cookies and Justin had then given his children some time on their own to spend together. Vicky had proudly shown Luke all the new things she had learned at school since he had been gone and Justin knew that she needed this time with her brother.

He had been in the living-room sketching while they had been upstairs and he had just moved into the kitchen five minutes ago to get started on dinner.

“You don't have to. You can spend some time with Vicky, it's fine,” Justin said as he turned around to look at Luke.

“I want to,” Luke said quietly. “I miss us cooking together,” he added, his voice hardly above a whisper as he met his father's gaze. “And she's busy drawing a picture for me of herself in her costume anyway so I'll already have an idea what she'll look like as a star.”

Justin smiled and then nodded, knowing better than to say no when his son actually wanted to spend time with him. They had often cooked together, would often prepare dinners together. Just like soccer was the thing that Brian and Luke had in common, cooking was the thing Justin and Luke had in common. They both loved doing it, found it to be very relaxing and they often did it together. It was a time when they could just talk, catch up and just spend some time together.

“I miss it, too.”

“What are we having?” Luke asked, looking at the vegetables his father had gotten from the fridge.

“I was thinking a vegetable stir fry with some brown rice,” Justin said, looking at Luke for approval. “It will be quick and easy to make.”

“Sounds good,” Luke agreed, taking the peppers and moving over to the counter. “How about I start cutting these?”

“That would be great,” Justin said, before he took the broccoli and cauliflower and started cleaning them.

They worked in companionable silence until Vicky joined them about ten minutes later. She announced that she needed to practice her lines, so Luke moved over to the table where she was sitting, cutting some more vegetables there, so he could help her practice her lines.

Justin watched them and couldn't help but smile. Even though Vicky was so much younger than Gus and Luke, it was obvious how much her brothers loved and adored her. They were really close to her, something for which Justin was glad. He knew that he and Molly had never been that close when he had been Luke's age and it made him feel quite bad at times.

They were close enough now, but when he had been a teenager, he had mostly been annoyed by his younger sister while Gus and Luke really seemed to love her and loved spending time with her.

He had just put on the rice, when he heard the front door of the house, knowing that Brian was home. Much like he had realised it, so had Vicky, who immediately jumped off her chair and ran into the hallway, greeting her father in a manner that the whole house could hear.

Justin had texted Brian earlier, letting him know that Luke would come for dinner, so at least Brian wouldn't be surprised by Vicky's exuberant announcement.

“Daddy! Luke is here and he will stay for dinner,” she exclaimed much to both Justin's and Luke's amusement.

“I know,” Brian told her calmly. “That's really nice, isn't it?”

They could then hear something that sounded like Vicky was whispering to her Daddy and Brian was actually whispering back to her.

“I promise, princess,” Brian said in a serious voice, before they appeared a few seconds later in the kitchen.

Justin wondered what that was about, but didn't get too much time to wonder about it, because he felt arms encircling his waist a couple of seconds later. “Hey,” he greeted his husband, smiling into the embrace.

“Hey,” Brian greeted back, leaving a quick kiss on Justin's temple. “You good?”

Justin nodded, then smiled up at Brian. “We're making vegetable stir fry. Sound good?”

Now it was Brian's turn to nod. “Just let me get changed and out of this suit. I'll be back in a few minutes.”

“Okay,” Justin whispered, leaning into Brian's body some more, before he felt him pull away.

Before Brian left the kitchen, he stopped at the kitchen table, where Luke and Vicky were back to practising her lines.

“Hey, sonny boy,” he said, meeting Luke's gaze when he looked up. “It's nice that you're staying for dinner.”

Luke nodded, not quite sure what to reply to that.

“Vicky is really excited about you being here,” his father then said, looking at him from eyes that made it clear that it wasn't just Vicky, but that his father was really happy about him being there for dinner as well.

“I know,” Luke said, smiling slightly. “So am I.”

“That's good,” Brian said in a heartfelt voice, meeting Luke's gaze for a bit longer. “That's good,” he then said more quietly, as he moved out of the room.

He returned a couple of minutes later, now wearing jeans and a shirt, having gotten out of his Armani suit.

He watched his children for a while from the doorway, before he made his presence known.

“What are you guys doing?”

“We're practising my lines, Daddy,” Vicky said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“How many lines does a star have?” Brian frowned, but immediately shut up when he saw the look Justin gave him.

“You'd be surprised,” Luke just gave back with a smirk that was very similar to his father's trademark smirk.

“Tell Daddy about your rehearsal today, honey,” Justin urged as he moved over to the table as well.

Vicky then started a detailed recount of the rehearsal. From the way her costume looked, to the way every single other costume looked, to the way the stage was decorated.

Brian listened with great interest only meeting Justin's eyes once. When he did, those eyes clearly said: 'You deserve that for your comment about her lines'. And he had to agree, he did.

By the time Vicky was done with her recount, dinner was ready and everyone settled around the table.

It was a surprisingly nice dinner and conversation was light. Brian told them about his day at the office when Vicky asked him how his day had been, they talked about Luke's school and how he was doing and unlike what Brian had expected, it had been rather nice and not uncomfortable.

Most of the conversation had been carried by Luke and Vicky, but even when he or Justin had said something or asked something, Luke's replies had been normal enough. For someone who didn't know what was going on, this could have almost seemed like any other family dinner.

Only that they knew that it wasn't and the truth of their situation was always in the back of their minds.

After dinner Vicky helped her papa clear the table, leaving Brian and Luke at the table on their own.

“So... you and Jenny are good again?” Brian asked, looking at Luke carefully, not sure if this was a question he should be asking, but as he had been the one to drop Luke off at Debbie's place, he knew they wanted to talk, so he figured he was just showing some interest in his son's life.

“Yeah,” Luke said, knowing full well that his father was only trying to make small-talk. He was pretty sure that the grapevine had already informed him of their trip to see a movie.

“That's good,” Brian said with a nod.

Luke nodded as well.

“You made your sister and your Papa really happy today,” Brian said next, looking at his son from warm eyes. “They really enjoyed having you here for dinner.”

“I know.”

“And so did I. I am glad you came by, Luke,” Brian said, meeting his son's gaze. “I know... things are still complicated, but... I am glad you were here today.”

Luke nodded, not looking at his father, but at his hands on the table. “So am I,” he admitted quietly.

A second later, Justin joined them again, stopping behind Brian's chair. He rested a hand on his husband's shoulder, squeezing it gently.

“Luke, if you want, I can take you back to Emmett's place, whenever you're ready to leave. Just let me know, okay?”

“I...,” Luke started, but then stopped, not quite sure how to continue. He then looked up at his fathers, meeting their gazes. “Can I talk to you guys after Vicky is in bed? I... There's something I need to say before I leave and... I think it's best if she's already in bed.”

“Okay,” Justin said slowly, tightening his grip on Brian's shoulder. “Yeah, sure.”

“I can just get started on my homework while you take her to bed,” Luke said, making it clear that he would be fine with his dads taking their time with his sister as they usually did. He didn't want to interfere with her bedtime rituals, knowing how much she loved this time with her fathers.

“If you're sure,” Brian said, looking at Luke questioningly.

Luke nodded. “Yeah.”

A couple of minutes later, Justin took Vicky for her bath, while Luke retreated to his room and got started on his homework. Brian moved to the living-room to watch some news, changing to one of Vicky's favourite cartoons when she came back from her bath.

They finished the cartoon before it was time for her to go to bed. On their way to her bedroom, they stopped at Luke's room, where Vicky engulfed her brother in a tight hug. They said goodbye and Luke promised that he would be over again soon which made Vicky very happy.

Brian then took her to her bedroom and read her a bedtime story. Once the story was finished, he helped her get comfortable in her bed and talked some more to her. This was their quiet time, time where they would talk about this and that.

“Daddy?”

“Hmmmmm, princess?”

“Did you say that you're sorry to Luke?” Vicky asked, looking at him from big eyes.

“Yes, I did. I promised you I would and I did,” Brian said honestly.

“That's good,” Vicky nodded. “I think he misses us, you know? Just like we miss him.”

“I know he does,” Brian said quietly.

“But if he misses us and we miss him... why can't he just come home?”

“It's not that easy, princess...,” Brian sighed, not for the first time wondering how to best explain this to his young daughter. “But the fact that he was here for dinner today and spent time with us... it's a step in the right direction. It's just gonna take a bit more time.”

“I don't like waiting...I want him to come home to us,” Vicky said in a way that made Brian smile at her.

“I know... I am not very patient either. I am sure if we just wait a bit longer, things will return even more to normal than they are now.”

“Okay, Daddy.”

“Try not to worry about it too much, princess. Whatever happens, Luke loves you very much and will always love you.”

“I love him, too.”

“So do I and so does your Papa. We just have to wait a bit longer, okay?” Brian then leaned down, leaving a kiss on her nose which made her chuckle. “Now go to sleep. You've got school tomorrow.”

“Okay, Daddy. Goodnight!”

“Goodnight. Sleep tight,” Brian whispered, before he gave her a goodnight kiss. He then made sure that she was tucked in securely and left her room. As he was about to close the door, he heard her quiet voice calling out for him once more.

“Oooh, I almost forgot: I love you, Daddy!”

“I love you, too! More than you can imagine,” Brian replied, smiling at his little daughter before he finally left the room.

He wasn't surprised to find Justin outside the room waiting for him in the hallway.

“I love you, too,” the blond announced, giving Brian a quick kiss.

“Hmmmm,” Brian sighed into the kiss, pulling Justin closer. “Love you, too.”

They both made sure that the kiss wouldn't get too passionate, knowing that Luke was still waiting for them and wanted to talk to them.

“I am scared,” Brian whispered as he looked at Justin from worried eyes.

“Don't be,” Justin whispered back, smiling encouragingly at Brian. “I am sure it will be fine.”

“I hope you're right, Sunshine.”

“Dinner didn't end in a disaster and there was no yelling and screaming either. I think we're moving in the right direction,” Justin said seriously, taking Brian's hand and giving it a squeeze.

Brian nodded, knowing that Justin was right. Together they then made their way to Luke's room.

They knocked and when Luke told them to enter, they did.

“You said there was something you needed to say to us,” Justin started as he and Brian moved towards Luke's bed and sat down on it. Luke was sitting at his desk, looking at his fathers and nodded.

“I just... I am not quite sure how to...,” Luke started, looking at his fathers from a face that spoke of his insecurity and nervousness.

“Whatever it is, you can tell us honestly,” Brian said, hoping that he would be able to quell some of his son's insecurity. “We promise to listen and not get angry.”

Luke nodded, then took a deep breath.

“I...I am just so confused right now and... I am not even sure if what I want to say will make sense...”

“Just tell us,” Justin said quietly, looking at his son from loving eyes. “Whatever it is, I am sure we'll figure it out together.”

“It's just that... everything is so complicated right now and... I hate it... I hate feeling this way...I hate that we're fighting. I hate that I am angry with you because... I know I shouldn't be... it feels like I shouldn't be and should be more appreciative of all you've done for me and I am... I know that you love me. Both of you! I know that you always did and I know that you always will, no matter what. I know that, but... at the same time I am so angry and... I don't think I even want to be, but I am and...I miss you... I miss being here... I miss us all spending time together as a family, but then... I am also so angry and ... I feel like I shouldn't be missing you, but I do and ... I just wish I wouldn't feel so damn confused by it all,” Luke started to explain haltingly.

He looked at Justin when he spoke next. “I know that you forgave Dad and... I know that Gus did too and now it feels like I am unreasonable because I haven't and... it feels like I have to because you and Gus did as well and... then I think about how much I miss being here, miss being here with you and Vicky and... I feel like I want to and then at the same time, I am still so angry and I know that I can't and...,” Luke stopped, once again taking a deep breath. When he continued, he looked at both of his fathers. “I am trying... I really am. I want you to know that, but... I don't think I am there yet and... I guess what I am trying to say is... I don't hate you. Either of you,” he said as he looked at Brian specifically. “When I said that... I was angry and it was the anger speaking. I love you... both of you and I really want to try and work through this, I am just asking you to... can you please let me try and work through this on my own in my own time?”

“Luke,” Brian started, meeting his son's gaze. “I know I've said it before, but... I want you to know how very sorry I am. And not just for what happened fifteen years ago, but... also for what you're going through now. I know it's my fault and I wish there was something I could do to take away this pain that you're going through now and... we'll do whatever you want us to do. We'll give you all the time in the world!”

Justin nodded in agreement with Brian's words. “Honey, we'll give you all the time in the world and we'll do whatever it takes to fix this.”

Luke nodded. “I just... I don't want to be completely cut off from everyone... I've felt so lonely this last week and a half, but at the same time... I am not sure if I really want to see anyone... it's just so confusing.”

“Luke,” Justin started, looking at his son from sad eyes. He felt so bad for the pain that Luke was going through, remembering so well what it had felt like when he had gone through the same pain so many years ago.

“I just...,” Luke continued, not giving Justin a chance to say anything else. “Today was okay... today was nice,” he then said, looking at his fathers from insecure eyes, almost begging them to agree with him.

“It was,” Brian agreed with a smile. “It was so nice to have you home again and have you spend time with us.”

“That meant the world to us, Luke,” Justin agreed with a sunshine smile.

Luke nodded slowly, before he continued. “I... I think I'd like to do that again.”

“Of course,” Justin said. “Honey, you are always welcome here. This is your home and whenever you feel like coming by, you come by. The door will always be open for you.”

“I just... I don't want to make any promises that this will become a weekly thing or a bi-weekly thing... I don't think I am ready yet to make any promises,” Luke admitted.

“And you don't have to. Like your Papa said, this is your home and you'll always be welcome here. When you feel like it, you come by and you stay for as long or short as you want...no strings attached,” Brian replied calmly, his voice full of understanding. “We don't want you to do anything you don't feel comfortable with, Luke. We don't want to pressure you into anything you're not ready for... whatever feels right to you, let us know and it will be okay. We'll be here, for as long or short as you'll want us to be.”

“Thanks,” Luke said quietly, his voice full of relief. “I... I know this is not what you were hoping for, but for now... I think it's all I can do...”

“And we'll take it,” Justin said, smiling at his son. “It's so much better than we could have hoped for. And... I don't want you to feel pressured by what I did or by what Gus did. This is about you and your feelings. No one can tell you how to feel or how to react. That is up to you and no one else and if this is what you can offer us right now, then we'll gladly accept it. We love you, Luke! And we will still love you if you don't talk to us, we will still love you if you occasionally come by for dinner, we will still love you if you one day decide to move back in here... We will always love you, no matter what!”

“I know,” Luke whispered, looking at his fathers from teary eyes. “I know.”

They looked at each other for several seconds, before Justin couldn't take it any longer. He got up from his seat on Luke's bed and slowly made his way over.

“May I?” He asked, knowing that he should respect Luke's boundaries and he felt beyond relieved when he saw his son nod.

He immediately wrapped his arms around him and held him tight. “I love you... Never forget that, okay? No matter what!”

“I love you, too, Papa!”

They hugged for a while, before Justin pulled back, gently wiping away the tears on Luke's face. He smiled when Luke turned towards Brian, who was still sitting on the bed and watching them from his place.

“I love you, too, Dad!”

“And I love you,” Brian whispered, before he came over as well, wrapping one arm around Luke and pulling him closer when he nodded his consent. “I love you, too!”

Chapter 31

After Justin had taken Luke back to Emmett's place that night, things had continued as normal. On Friday Luke had joined them for dinner once more and once again it had been a surprisingly nice experience.

It was obvious that they were all missing their normal time together and when Luke stayed for dinner, they made the most of that time together.

Conversation flowed easily and was nice and Vicky was beyond happy to see her brother once more.

On Sunday Luke even joined family dinner which had surprised both Brian and Justin. Family dinner had been scheduled to take place at Emmett's house and Justin had offered that they could host it at Britin instead, so Luke wouldn't be put in an awkward position with the whole family coming over to his temporary home.

Emmett had thanked him for the offer, but had then explained that Luke had talked to him and had told him that he would be fine with dinner going ahead as planned and everyone coming to his house.

Both Brian and Justin had been beyond surprised, but had decided to go with the flow. As Luke had asked them, they allowed him to do this in his own time and if he felt that family dinner would be okay, they would be the last to contradict him.

When dinner came around, neither was really surprised though that Luke mostly spent his time with Jenny and Vicky and mostly avoided talking to any of the adults. There were short greetings, but that was mostly it and thankfully everyone in the family seemed to accept that Luke wasn't ready for more yet.

Brian still remembered how Luke had come up to him after dinner and had sat down in the seat next to his where Vicky had been sitting earlier.

“Dad?”

“Yeah?” Brian looked at his son with a frown, slightly surprised that Luke was now sitting next to him after he had pretty much ignored all of the adults, including him and Justin for most of the evening.

“Are you busy at work tomorrow?”

Brian frowned, not quite sure what to make of that question. “I don't think so. This close to Christmas there shouldn't be anything too urgent. I'll have to check with Ted.”

Luke nodded, then cleared his throat.

“It's just that... I have that follow-up appointment at the hospital tomorrow and... I wondered if you could come along. I mean... you know about these types of injuries and know what to ask and what to pay attention to,” he said and it wasn't hard for Brian to hear the insecurity in his son's voice. “Only if you're not busy of course. Otherwise I can just ask Papa or Emmett or someone...”

Brian turned to look at Luke more closely. “Of course I can come along. You know I'll make the time for it.”

“Thanks, Dad. I... I appreciate it,” Luke said quietly, looking at his father gratefully.

“Of course,” Brian nodded. “When is the appointment?”

“After school. I was thinking I could take the bus once class is over.”

“I can pick you up from school. I'll be coming in from Pittsburgh and will pass it anyway,” Brian offered.

“Yeah, that would be great,” Luke nodded. “Thanks, Dad.”

“Don't worry about it,” Brian said seriously. “You know I'll always be available if you need me.”

Luke nodded gratefully, then moved away to his seat next to Jenny again.

When Brian turned around, he felt Justin's hand on his thigh giving him a gentle squeeze. As he looked up and met his husband's gaze, he saw a gentle smile on his face.

“This is good,” Justin said quietly and Brian had to agree. It was good. It was another step in the right direction.

And so Brian had joined Luke at the hospital on Monday for his follow-up. Thankfully, everything had looked good and Luke hadn't felt any pain or discomfort when the doctor had asked him to walk a couple of steps in his office.

It seemed like Luke's ankle had healed nicely and was okay. Nevertheless, the doctor urged him to still take it slow and to not put too much pressure on the ankle. He advised Luke to keep wearing a bandage to offer support for his ankle for at least another week or two and to not do any sports for at least another week.

No one had seemed surprised at Luke's relief to get rid of his crutches and he seemed happy enough as they had left the clinic.

Brian asked Luke if he wanted to come home to tell Justin about the good news himself and was quite excited when Luke agreed.

They then went home and Luke stayed for another dinner with his family at which they celebrated the good news that his ankle was doing okay and he was rid of the crutches that had annoyed him so much.

Luke had come for dinner one more time on the Wednesday of that week and had surprised both Brian and Justin when he had asked them if it was okay if he spent the night on Friday.

“It's Mark's birthday slash Christmas party and I think it's better if someone just has to pick me up and get me back here instead of getting me all the way back to Pittsburgh to Emmett's place,” he had said as he had looked at both his fathers during dinner on Wednesday.

Mark was one of Luke's closest friends and they had been friends ever since they had been in pre-school together. He lived in the same neighbourhood, about five minutes away by car and Luke and Mark had spent many playdates together and would ride to school together, etc.

Brian and Justin knew Mark's parents very well and there had been many sleepovers at their house or Mark's house. They trusted Mark's parents just like Mark's parents trusted them and both sets of parents had become good friends over the years that their sons had been friends.

As Mark's birthday was so close to Christmas, it had become kind of a tradition in the last three years that he would have a birthday/Christmas party for all his friends. It wasn't really a party per se as there was no alcohol, but there was music, greasy food and lots of soda, kind of a last hurrah before the Christmas holidays would begin and everyone would spend more time with their families than their friends.

Brian and Justin remembered how much fun Luke had had at the party the previous year and with Mark being his best friend, they knew he wouldn't want to miss it. And he shouldn't. Not because of some problems that he had with his fathers. That shouldn't impact his friendships with his friends from school.

“We can take you back to Pittsburgh, Luke. That will be fine. You don't have to stay here if you don't want to,” Justin said quietly, looking at his son from honest eyes. “It's fine.”

“There's supposed to be rain and freezing temperatures,” Luke pointed out. “I don't think driving all the way to Pittsburgh would be good with the weather taking a turn like that.”

“Are you sure?” Brian asked, looking at Luke from worried eyes. They knew that things had been better over the last week, but everyone was aware that they were still far from being back to normal. “I am sure if we speak to Mark's parents and explain, they wouldn't mind letting you sleep over if you're more comfortable with that...”

“It's alright, Dad...Papa... Really,” Luke assured his parents, looking at them from sincere eyes. “I wouldn't have asked if it wasn't and... I know that they wouldn't mind if I asked them, but... I think... I think I want to sleep here in my own room...”

Brian and Justin nodded. Both had heard the longing in Luke's voice and knew that this was something he needed to do. They knew that this was the next step and that he needed to see if he was okay with staying at home again. And neither of them would have said anything to stop him. If he thought he was ready for this and this was what he wanted to do, then they would support him and be happy about it. It was the least they could do.

“Okay,” Justin agreed, looking first at Brian, then at Luke. “You know you're always welcome here and if this is what you want to do, this is what we'll do. Your Dad or I can pick you up after the party, no problem.”

And so they had looked forward to Luke spending a night at their home again. It was kind of ridiculous how happy the prospect of Luke spending a night at home made them, but to them it was a further sign that things were moving in the right direction and that Luke was slowly moving on from what had happened when he had been a baby as well. Three weeks ago he had yelled at them and had told them that he hated them and had been ready to run away from home and now he wanted to spend the night. They had clearly made a lot of steps in the right direction over the last three weeks.

It had been close to midnight on the Friday when Luke had called Justin's phone, asking him if he could pick him up from Mark's house as the party was winding down.

In the end it had been Brian who had driven out and had picked up their son.

“Dad? I thought Papa would come and pick me up,” Luke frowned when he saw his Dad in the hallway of Mark's parents' house.

“With the icy conditions outside, we decided it was better if I went and picked you up,” Brian just shrugged and it was clear to Luke that there was more to the story than his Dad was saying, but he also knew that this wasn't the right time to ask questions as they were surrounded by his friends and some parents.

“Okay,” Luke just nodded, though his eyes made it clear that he still had questions. “Can we give Sam a ride home? His mom is home alone as his Dad is at a company Christmas thing and she's a bit afraid of driving in this weather. He lives just around the corner from us, really.”

“Sure,” Brian nodded, looking around at the boys and some of the girls gathered in the hallway. “Does anyone else need a ride?”

They all shook their head and Mark's father just came up to them at that moment. “Are you sure it won't be a problem, Brian? We can give Sam a ride home, no problem.”

Brian waved away his offer. “Don't worry about it. We're already out and on the way anyway. No need for you to get out in these conditions as well.”

“Thanks! I really appreciate it,” he said, sounding rather glad not to have to get out at this time of night.

Brian nodded once more, then turned to Luke and Sam. “You guys ready to head home?”

They both nodded, then said goodbye to their friends as more parents arrived, ready to pick up their children. Brian made small-talk with some of them, knowing them from various school events that had taken place over the years and they all waited for the kids to say goodbye and wish each other happy holidays.

Ten minutes later he and the two boys were on their way home. They dropped of Sam who only lived a couple of minutes up the road from them, then made their way back to Britin.

“Dad?” Luke asked, turning to look at his father from the passenger seat. “Is everything okay with Papa?”

“Of course, your Papa is fine,” Brian said, focusing on the road ahead, which had by now become quite slippery. It had rained earlier and temperatures were freezing which always made for bad road conditions.

“It's just that he said this afternoon that he would come and pick me up and... I know he doesn't really mind driving in these conditions. He does it all the time.”

And Luke was right. Just like Brian was used to driving in these conditions, so was Justin. You didn't grow up in Pittsburgh and live there for so many years without knowing how to drive in winter. And they had been living at Britin for long enough to both be used to winters and drives in winter. There had been enough days with bad weather when they had needed to head into Pittsburgh for whatever reason and both of them were more than familiar with driving in this weather.

Brian sighed, knowing that Luke had looked right through him and his excuse. “He was painting this afternoon. He overstrained his hand a bit and has had cramps all evening. We both agreed that it wasn't really safe for him to drive in this weather if there was a chance that his hand had a cramp during the ride home.”

Luke nodded, then let out a quiet 'Shit'.

“He'll be fine,” Brian immediately tried to assure his son. “You know how his hand gets. He'll just have to take it easy for a day or two and then it'll be okay. He won't like it, but that's how it always is.”

All their children had seen Justin overdo it and had seen his hand having cramps over the years. They all knew why it was happening and that while it was painful and annoying, it wasn't anything serious and would go away again in a day or two. They also knew that other than resting his hand and doing some exercises, there wasn't much that could be done about it.

“It just sucks that it's still happening after all these years,” Luke said quietly, looking at his dad from sad eyes.

He knew the story of his father getting attacked at his prom, he knew the story of him being in a coma and the brain injury he had suffered from and he had also heard about the effects that attack had had on both his parents. He knew how much his Dad hated to see his Papa in pain and he knew how much he was bothered by these cramps when they happened.

“Nothing we can do about it,” Brian just replied, never taking his eyes off the road in front of him. “He's fine. You know he is. Don't worry about him.”

“You're doing enough of that for all of us,” Luke stated, knowing that it was the truth. He knew that his Dad worried about his Papa and every time he had trouble with his hand, it seemed to bother his Dad almost more than his Papa. His Papa seemed to have resigned himself to the fact that it happened and was part of his life, but his Dad always seemed to get angry when it happened and started hovering which in return only annoyed his Papa who didn't see what the big deal was.

“How annoyed is he with you on a scale of one to ten?” Luke therefore asked next, a mischievous grin on his face as he looked at his Dad.

Brian threw a glare in his son's direction, then quickly focused back on the road. Luke almost expected that his father wouldn't reply when he heard a quiet mutter, almost as quiet as a whisper.

“Eight.”

Luke just shook his head in amusement. “You two are hopeless... You know how much he hates when you hover when his hand is giving him a hard time.”

As they turned into the drive to Britin, Brian threw a glance in Luke's direction once more. “And he knows I can't help it. So tough luck...”

Luke chuckled as they made their way up to the house. He knew his parents would probably never change and really, he wasn't sure if he wanted them to.

His Papa having trouble with his hand, his Dad hovering and being overbearing, telling him he shouldn't have overstrained it to begin with, his Papa then getting angry with his Dad and them both muttering angrily about how stubborn the other was was something Luke was as familiar with as his Dad overdoing it on one of their runs, his Papa worrying about his lungs and his Dad getting angry with his Papa for worrying too much. It was just who they were and Luke knew better than to be worried about the fact that they had obviously been fighting.

They always did and then just like they would get angry at each other, his Dad would wordlessly massage his Papa's hand and help him with his exercises to alleviate the pain and all would be good again between them.

He had witnessed it many times before and more than anything it just amused him by now which was why he was still grinning when his Dad parked the car in the garage and they made their way inside.

Luke wasn't surprised to find his Papa sitting at the kitchen table with a cup of tea in front of him and his microwaveable heat pack wrapped around his hand.

“How was the party?” Justin asked him the moment they entered the kitchen.

“Good, we had a good time. How's your hand?” Luke nodded towards the heat pack that was wrapped around it.

“Not nearly as bad as he'd like you to believe,” he sighed, throwing a look at Brian that spoke about the fact that he knew that Brian had told Luke about his hand. “Almost as good as new.”

Luke nodded, then moved to the fridge and got himself some juice. “That's good.”

He wasn't able to hide his smile when he saw his Dad wordlessly sit down next to his Papa, saw him unwrap the heat pack and start massaging the smaller hand gently. His Papa allowed it to happen without a word and that more than anything showed Luke that they would be alright. Just like they had always been so many times before.

“I think I'll head to bed. It's been a long day.”

“Alright,” Justin nodded. “Sleep tight! We love you!”

“Love you, sonny boy,” his Dad said as well.

Luke nodded. “Love you, too.”

He then headed towards the hallway and the stairs to his room.

When he got up the next morning, he wasn't surprised when he found his fathers kissing as they were preparing breakfast. Just as he had known and expected, they were fine and things had returned to normal between them.

They were kissing just as much as always and seemed just as happy as ever as they prepared breakfast.

Vicky was drinking a glass of orange juice and rolled her eyes at him when he came into the kitchen, making a face about their fathers' antics.

“They just won't stop kissing,” she sighed dramatically in her brother's direction.

“You should be used to it by now,” their Dad threw in their direction when he moved his lips away from their Papa's for a few short seconds.

“I am hungry, Daddy... How much longer till we can have breakfast?” Vicky asked, looking at her father from what she hoped were miserable eyes that would get him to finally take pity on her and get her some breakfast.

“Only two more minutes,” her Papa announced, making his way out of their dad's embrace and bringing over a plate full of pancakes. He then headed to the fridge for some toppings and fruit salad that he had prepared earlier.

Once everything was on the table, they sat down and started having breakfast.

“Are you going back to Auntie Em's soon or will you stay and play with me for a bit?” Vicky asked Luke after she had finished her first pancake. “Please stay and play with me.”

“Sure, I don't have any plans today,” Luke said, smiling at his sister. “Though I want to get in some exercise. I haven't really had much chance recently and was thinking I could spend some time in the gym.”

They had their own gym in the basement though only Brian and Luke used it. Justin just couldn't be bothered and always claimed that he got enough of a workout by being married to Brian and Gus claimed that exercise was overrated anyway. Thankfully, he had inherited his father's genes and was naturally thin.

“Remember what the doctor said,” Brian said with a raised eyebrow.

“I was thinking I could use the bike. That should be fine with my ankle.”

Brian nodded slowly, though it was clear that he wasn't really all too happy about it.

“Why don't you come and join me? That way you can make sure I won't overdo it,” Luke offered, looking up at his Dad. They had often exercised together, so why not do it again?

“I think that would be a good idea,” Justin said, looking from Brian to Luke and back.

And that's where they were now. In their gym in the basement, Brian running on the treadmill while Luke was using the stationary bike.

They had been down here for the last thirty minutes and Luke knew that they should probably call it a day soon. For the sake of his ankle as well as his Dad's lungs. And because there was something he needed to talk to his Dad about. And it was eating at his nerves and he wasn't sure how much longer he could keep it inside.

“Dad?” He asked, stopping his exercise and turning towards his dad who was looking up at him from the treadmill.

“Can I ask you something?” Luke went on after he had wiped his face with his towel and walked over to the treadmill where his dad was now slowing down the pace and was by now walking at a comfortable pace, looking at him with a frown.

“Sure, what is it?”

“Do you think...,” Luke sighed, taking a deep breath before he continued. “Do you think it would be okay if I came home?”

Brian stopped the treadmill completely and looked at his son from surprised eyes. “If that's what you want to do,” he said slowly, looking at his son closely, not quite sure what to make of that question.

“I just... I don't think I want to not be home for Christmas... I mean... I love Emmett and Drew, but... I think I want to be home for Christmas. With you, Papa...Gus and Vicky,” the boy went on, his voice quiet and full of emotion.

“We would love that,” Brian said sincerely. “I would love that.”

“I just... I know I want to be home for Christmas, but I am still so confused by everything...,” Luke admitted, looking at his Dad from pained eyes.

“We would love to have you back home, Luke. If only for Christmas or even beyond that... We can take it one day at a time. No need to make a final decision yet,” Brian said, looking at his son from understanding eyes. “We promised you that we wouldn't pressure you and we won't.”

Luke nodded gratefully. “Thanks, Dad.”

“If you want to come home for Christmas, we'll gladly have you. I know it will make my Christmas and I am sure it will be the same for your Papa as well and... beyond that... we can worry about that when Christmas is over and you know how it felt for you to be back home.”

“Would you be angry if... if I wanted to go back to Emmett's after Christmas?” Luke asked, his voice wavering slightly as he spoke.

“Sad,” Brian said. “I would be sad, but I wouldn't be angry. Luke, I just want you to be happy and if coming home for Christmas and then going back to Emmett's is what will make you happy, then that's what you'll do. And if you decide that you want to stay after Christmas, then that will be more than okay as well. We'll do this at your pace and you decide what you feel comfortable with. It's completely up to you, but... this is your home and as far as your Papa and I are concerned, we'll always want you back here and we'll always be happy to have you here.”

Luke nodded. “Thanks, Dad!”

“Come here,” Brian said quietly, opening his arms for a hug. He was glad when Luke didn't hesitate and immediately came over and engulfed him. “I love you, Luke. Always have, always will. Never forget that!”

“I love you, too, Dad,” Luke whispered as he hugged his father.

After a few minutes of them hugging and holding each other close, Luke slowly pulled back and made a face at his father. “I stink like a pig... I really need a shower.”

“You and me both, sonny boy,” Brian agreed after raising his arms and making a show of taking a sniff and making a disgusted face. “You and me both.”

Luke wiped his face with his towel once more, then headed for the door.

“Before you go and take that shower, go and tell your Papa, okay? You'll really make his day,” Brian said, his voice gentle and loving when he spoke.

Luke nodded, a small smile on his face as he left the room.

“You just made mine, sonny boy,” Brian whispered as he looked after him, a single tear making its way down his face.

Chapter 32

“I can't say that I expected to find you here, baby brother,” Gus said as he plopped down on Luke's bed and looked at his younger brother. He had just flown in from New York earlier that day and his Dad had just picked him up from the airport.

Luke just shrugged in response.

“Last time we spoke, you were still pretty adamant that you hated Papa and Dad,” Gus continued, looking at his brother from questioning eyes. “What happened to that?”

Luke sighed in annoyance, clearly annoyed by his brother's questions. “You know that I was angry and that I didn't meant it... everybody knows...”

“It's still a long way to moving back home,” Gus pointed out. And he meant it, he hadn't expected Luke to be back home for Christmas. The last time they had spoken Luke had still been angry at their fathers and had also been pretty angry at him for having forgiven them so easily.

“I am trying to work things out with them,” Luke just said. “It's not like I can ignore them for the rest of my life.”

“And it has nothing to do with you missing home, missing Papa and Dad?”

Luke glared at Gus, then lowered his eyes. When he replied, his voice was very quiet. “Maybe...”

“Look,” Gus said quietly, looking at his brother from warm eyes. “I am glad you're here. You're an annoying, little pest, but I am glad you're here. I know it'll mean the world to Dad and Papa.”

“Fuck off,” Luke just muttered, glaring at his older brother. His brother had earned that comment for calling him an annoying, little pest.

Gus slowly got up from the bed and walked towards the door. He turned around to look at Luke once more. “I mean it. It means the world to them that you're here. I haven't seen them this happy ever since they talked to us.”

“Why do you care so much about how they feel?” Luke frowned.

“They're my parents and I want them to be happy. They've been through enough shit already.”

“You really don't care, do you?” Luke asked with a raised eyebrow.

“Care about what?” Now it was Gus' turn to frown.

“About Dad's lie... about everyone going along with it... about the fact that it cost us five years with Papa?”

Gus sighed, but held Luke's gaze. “Of course I care, but... at the end of the day... it didn't nearly have as big an impact on my life as it had on yours and Papa's and... as far as I am concerned, Dad was always there for me when I needed him. It's more than I can say for my moms, that's for sure. He clearly feels sorry for what happened and regrets it very much. What's the point in being angry with him so many years later? Our life has gone on, he and Papa worked it out and we are one happy family. To me that's all that matters.”

Luke nodded slowly, taking in Gus' words. “You don't think it's Dad's fault that Papa stopped seeing you?”

Gus sighed once more. “That was because of a lie my mothers told him. Yes, they could only tell that lie because of Dad's lie, but... I know that Dad never wanted for Papa to stop spending time with me. Papa still came to Toronto after they had broken up, he still called me, sent me cards and gifts... He didn't stop seeing me because Dad broke up with him and lied about you. He stopped seeing me because my mothers lied to him. I am not going to blame Dad for their lies, too.”

“So you're not angry with him at all?” Luke frowned.

Gus shrugged. “I wouldn't say angry. I think I was pretty disappointed because... I don't know... I always thought Dad was better than that, you know? He was always there... he always loved us... he always put us first... even before his business when we were small... To hear the truth, I think I was disappointed because I always thought he was this great guy, but... I guess he's just human. Like any of us. And as humans we make mistakes. I don't think I know anyone who hasn't made any mistake of any kind,” he explained, only to be interrupted by Luke at that point.

“That was more than just a mistake.”

“Maybe, but at the end of the day he knows that what he did was wrong. He's sorry for what happened and as far as I am concerned, he tried to make up for it. He was always there for us, he worked things out with Papa, hell, they even got married... why hang on to something that's happened so many years ago when we've had ten happy years as a family since? I'd much rather remember those ten years full of happy memories with both Dad and Papa than some things that happened at a time so long ago.”

“It's not that easy,” Luke muttered, hanging his head.

“Life isn't easy. Sad, but true. In the end we all need to decide what's important to us and I decided that having two loving fathers was more important to me than hanging on to anger about something that wasn't even the worst thing to happen to me in my life...”

Luke stayed quiet, clearly hanging on to his own thoughts. Gus walked over to his side and squeezed his shoulders.

“You're getting there, baby brother. Just the fact that you're here shows that you're on the right way. I know you'll never admit it, but you love them just as much as they love you and you couldn't imagine a life without them being there to support you. And that's okay, you know?”

Luke only nodded slowly. After several seconds, he looked up at his older brother. “What about everyone else? The grandmas? The uncles? They all went along with it...”

Gus knelt down at Luke's side and looked at his brother. “And as far as I am concerned that's really between them and Papa. As far as I am concerned, they all loved me, supported me and were a loving family when I came to live with you and Dad. They were always there for me and... I love them. What happened back then was between them and Papa. They betrayed him and broke his trust and for whatever reason he forgave them. If he could, so can I. And I have a lot less to forgive them for than he had.”

“He forgave them because of me,” Luke said quietly, still not looking up at Gus. “He didn't want me to grow up with tension all around and fighting family members. He wanted me... us, really... to have a happy childhood with a loving family.”

“Sounds like a good enough reason to me,” Gus said quietly. “Papa always wanted us to be happy. He always put our happiness first. Just like Dad always did.”

“But... it means he forgave them for me, for us...but not for their own sake or for his sake....”

Gus could hear that Luke seemed really troubled by this and he wasn't quite sure why. “Maybe that's how it started, but Luke... you've been part of this family for long enough. You know how close Papa is with Grandma Jen, with Grandma Debbie... you know how much he enjoys being around the uncles... Maybe it started that way, but he couldn't be that close to them now if he hadn't also forgiven them for their own sake or his sake. Maybe it started that way many years ago, but I have no doubt that he loves all of them.”

“I guess,” Luke acquiesced. “I am just so damn confused,” he admitted next.

Gus stood up and once again squeezed his brother's shoulder. “You'll figure it out, baby brother. You're here now, that's a good start.”

With that he left his brother's room, leaving him alone to some of his thoughts.

***

Christmas had been a happy occasion in the Kinney-Taylor household, just as it had always been.

Brian and Justin had been beyond relieved and happy to have Luke back home for the holidays and had tried their best to make it a happy occasion for everyone without trying to overdo it.

Luke had agreed to join the family for Christmas dinner at Debbie's on Christmas Eve and had even joined in the conversations with the adults at times. It hadn't been like it had been before, but everyone could see that he was trying and in return everyone tried as well.

Brian and Justin had been glad that everyone seemed to accept Luke's boundaries and that no one seemed to pressure him when he wasn't ready for more and everyone just seemed happy about the fact that he was there and celebrating Christmas with their family.

Christmas day usually meant a huge dinner at Britin where the whole family met once more and compared to the day before at Debbie's place, it was obvious that Luke seemed even more at ease with his family than a day before.

Vicky loved having her brother home and loved Christmas in general, so as far as she was concerned the holidays were pretty perfect. Brian and Justin could only agree with her when they took her to bed on Christmas day after everyone had left.

On the 26th they had their usual Christmas brunch at Grandma Jen's house and once more the whole family came together. This time they were also joined by Aunt Molly and Aunt Daphne, who had celebrated Christmas Eve and Christmas Day with their families.

Everyone had a good time and even though it was the third gathering in three days – which Brian reminded everyone of several times – the atmosphere was still fun and relaxed.

Brian frowned when Justin stood up and excused himself, but assumed he was just heading for the bathroom. He didn't think much of it and didn't see that Justin left the room, but didn't turn for the bathroom, but the bedrooms on the other side of the hallway instead.

Unlike Brian, Justin was so trained on watching his husband during these family celebrations, that he had immediately noticed when Luke had left the room twenty minutes ago. And he had also noticed that his son hadn't returned yet. Hoping that everything was okay, he decided to go in search of him. He wasn't really surprised when he found Luke in what used to be his old bedroom and was now mostly used as a guestroom by his mother.

“Hey, you okay?” He asked quietly as he entered the room, looking at Luke who was lying on the bed, staring at the ceiling.

Luke just nodded, but didn't reply.

Justin slowly made his way over to the bed as well and sat down at Luke's side, looking at his son in concern. “Usually it's your Dad that goes running off during these gatherings. I am not used to you disappearing.”

“I just needed a break,” Luke muttered, still only looking at the ceiling and not at his father.

“They can be a bit much, huh?” Justin chuckled as he looked down at his son.

“I am trying,” Luke said quietly, not adding anything else to his statement.

Justin nodded, his voice gentle when he spoke. “I know you are. You have no idea how proud I am of you for the way you're handling the holidays.”

“Proud?” Luke frowned, now turning to meet his father's concerned gaze.

“Yeah, I know how hard this is for you and I am proud of you for trying... for not running away, but for facing all of them and... not only facing them once, but doing it three days in a row.”

“Was it hard for you as well?” Luke asked, his voice now very quiet.

“You've got no idea,” Justin said equally quiet. “I didn't think I could do it and... back then... it was only dinner at Britin on Christmas Day.”

“But you did... I remember that Christmas. We gave Dad the painting and... everyone came and looked at it and said how great it was...”

“Yeah, that painting,” Justin rolled his eyes, then chuckled humourlessly. “Did more harm than good... or maybe not... I don't know.”

Luke frowned, clearly not understanding his father's comment.

Justin sighed. “It sent your Dad off the deep end,” he said quietly. “But I guess in the end that turned out to be a good thing because it really made us talk things through... what we wanted, where we wanted to go as individuals, but also as a family.”

“That painting?” Luke frowned, not quite sure he could believe what his father was saying.

“Yeah... your Dad was still feeling very guilty for what had happened at the time and when he got the painting... of all of us being happy... he didn't really think that he deserved to be a part of that after what he had done...And, let's just say his guilt got the better of him... But it got us talking and we worked it out. That was what made him start going to therapy, so... I guess in the end it turned out to be a good thing after all,” Justin smiled slightly.

Luke nodded, still not sure he understood completely, but maybe this was just something his parents could fully understand.

They stayed quiet for a few minutes, though the silence wasn't uncomfortable. It was Luke who broke the silence. “Papa?”

“Hmmm?” Justin nodded, looking at his son.

“Are the grandmas angry with me?”

“No, why would you think that?”

Luke shrugged. “I don't know... I just... I mean what happened mostly impacted your relationship with them. Maybe they think I have no right to be angry at them...”

“They understand your feelings and your reaction, Luke,” Justin said quietly. “They know why you're angry with them.”

“But do I have a right to be?” Luke asked, looking at his father from confused eyes. “As far as I am concerned... they have always been great to me. They always loved me... they always cared for me and were there for me... do I seem ungrateful now?”

Justin considered his reply for a few seconds, then spoke calmly. “They know that you being angry with them doesn't mean that you're not grateful for the love you got from them before. Those are two separate things.”

“I just... I don't think I want them to be angry with me,” Luke said quietly.

Justin looked at his son for the longest time. “They know that what they did back then was wrong, Luke. They know that not telling me the truth about you... was not their finest hour, let's put it that way. And they know that you're entitled to your feelings and your reaction to finding out that they were part of the lie your father told me. No one is angry with you because you're hurt and feel betrayed. They all understand the part they played and... they all understand why you're hurt.”

“I missed them, you know? I know I shouldn't have, but I couldn't help it... I missed them these last few weeks,” Luke admitted quietly as tears came to his eyes.

“And that's alright,” Justin assured his son, his voice gentle as he spoke. “I missed them, too... They're your family, Luke. Of course you'd miss having them around.”

“Doesn't it make me weak that I missed them even though I am angry with them?”

“No, I think it makes you very strong,” Justin said sincerely. “You love them despite knowing the truth. And that's why you miss them because you still love them. Some say forgiving makes you seem weak, but... I don't think so. I think it takes a lot of strength to forgive someone you love for hurting you. And the first part to that forgiveness is to accept that you still love them and still want them to be a part of your life. I think the fact that you miss them and can admit that makes you very strong and it makes me very proud of you.”

“Thanks, Papa,” Luke said as he wiped away the tears that had gathered in his eyes.

Justin lay down next to Luke, opening his arms. He smiled when Luke moved over and rested his head on his chest like he had done so many times when he had been younger. He held his son close and spoke quietly.

“I know how hard this is for you... and I wish it wasn't like this. I really wish you could have been spared this, honey, but... I think in the long run knowing the truth will only make you stronger.”

Luke sniffed once, then nodded. “You didn't deserve any of this either,” he pointed out in a small voice.

“Unfortunately, life isn't always about what we deserve,” Justin sighed, holding his son close. “Sometimes we can only hold on and hope for the best.”

Luke nodded once more. After a while he moved his head off his father's chest and looked at him. “I am glad you were able to forgive Dad and everyone else. I... I can't imagine what our lives would have been like if you hadn't and... I think it makes you very strong.”

Justin smiled as he met Luke's gaze. “So do I. And I know that you're strong, too. Never doubt that, Luke.”

They stayed in the room for a couple more minutes before they returned and joined the rest of the family.

When it was Vicky's sixth birthday two days later, Justin was glad to see Luke interact more with the rest of the family as well.

There hadn't been any big conversations that he knew of, from what he could see it had just been something that Luke had decided. He had started to join in more conversations with other family members as well and before the day had been over, Justin had been happy to see Luke give his Grandma Debbie a hug.

He hoped that this was another sign that things were slowly returning to normal for their family. Hopefully they could finally move on and leave this topic behind them once and for all.

“What are you thinking about?” Brian whispered as he came up behind Justin and wrapped his arms around his husband's waist.

“Just how happy I am that everyone is here and that our family is complete again,” he whispered as he leaned into Brian's embrace, his eyes firmly fixed on where Luke was laughing at something Carl had told him and Gus.

“To be fair, I won't mind not seeing this sorry bunch for a while. Four times in five days is quite enough for me,” Brian said, though his eyes were dancing with mischief as he said it and Justin could also hear it in his voice.

“You know what I mean,” Justin admonished, resting one of his hands on Brian's that was now resting on his stomach.

“Yeah, I know,” Brian said, his voice now a lot more serious. He pulled Justin closer. “I know.”

“I think he'll be alright,” Justin said quietly, his eyes still focused on Luke's laughing form.

“I know he'll be... He's so much like you... How can he not be?” Brian said quietly.

“Has he mentioned anything to you about going back to Emmett's?” Justin asked, knowing that Luke hadn't said anything to him.

“No, he hasn't. He actually asked me yesterday if he could spend New Year's with Mark and Sam and if they could come over here to spend the night here,” Brian answered.

“He did?” Justin frowned, then smiled. As far as he was concerned that was good news. It meant that Luke planned to stay around until New Year's at least.

“You were so busy preparing everything for today, I wanted to mention it to you tomorrow,” Brian said as way of apology.

Justin nodded, then turned his head up, so he could kiss Brian. He smiled when Brian leaned down and met his lips. “I love you.”

“I had a feeling,” Brian whispered when the kiss broke. “You are the most amazing man I've ever met, do you know that?”

Justin smiled, running his hand over Brian's arm that was still holding him close. “I think you mentioned it once or twice.”

“You...this family... what our life is now... Twenty years ago that would have sounded like the worst idea ever, but now... I thank the Gods every day that things worked out this way.”

“We are quite lucky, aren't we?” Justin agreed with a happy smile.

“Because you made it all possible,” Brian whispered, leaning down for another kiss. “It's all thanks to you, Justin Kinney-Taylor.”

For once Justin didn't have anything to reply and just kissed Brian back, hoping to show him that way how much he loved him and their family and the life they had now.

Chapter 33

“So what did you think of your first Christmas with the Liberty Avenue gang?” Gus asked his sister as he looked up at her over his milkshake.

He, Luke and Jenny had met at the diner for lunch, deciding that it was time to spend some time without the adult members of their family for once.

“It was... interesting,” Jenny said after a short pause in which she considered her words.

“The good kind of interesting or the bad?” Gus asked with a frown.

He knew that their family could be a lot to take in at times and he knew that Jenny had only been with them for a bit more than a month and that things with her mom were still rough and that her mom's behaviour was hurting her, so he wasn't quite sure what she meant.

“The good,” Jenny smiled. “Everyone was so nice and it was so lovely to spend Christmas with so many people who all enjoyed spending time together. It was a new experience, but a good one. It's just such a big change from what my Christmas used to be like.”

“How did you normally celebrate Christmas?” Luke asked, looking at Jenny from curious eyes. He could only ever remember having these big family celebrations with the whole family around and couldn't really imagine any other way of celebrating Christmas.

“Not at all, really,” Jenny shrugged. “Mom's a Jew, so Christmas wasn't really a big thing for her which sucked, because... it's a big thing for everyone else. You come back to school and people ask you what kind of presents you got and you have to say: 'None' because she never cared about it. Usually Christmas was just like any other holiday. A day off with no work. Sometimes we'd have takeout and watch some movies, but most of the times she'd still be focused on one case or another, so I was mostly left in front of the TV on my own, watching all these Christmas movies about happy families celebrating the holidays together when it was never like that for me.”

“That sucks,” Luke said emphatically.

Jenny shrugged once more. “I didn't know anything else, so... I guess I got used to it. It only made this Christmas that much more special because... for the first time I felt like one of those kids in those movies. Waking up, having a tree, finding presents with my name on it, having a big dinner with the whole family... for the first time I felt like I had a real Christmas.”

“Have you heard from her at all?” Gus asked, not having to explain who he was refering to. Everyone in their booth knew that he was talking about Melanie.

“No,” Jenny shook her head, trying to sound as if she didn't care, but hardly able to hide the pain in her voice. It was clear that she was hurt by the fact that her mother hadn't contacted her at all since that day in court and hadn't talked to her at all.

“What a bitch,” Gus said, shaking his head angrily.

“I am not surprised. She probably considers me a traitor now because I chose this family in Pittsburgh over her. I didn't choose her, so now I am probably dead to her. Just like you were when you moved to live with your Dad.”

“I didn't really have a choice,” Gus said. “Not that I regret moving in with my Dad, but... it wasn't like I chose him. It was a judge's decision that I had no say in. Back then I would have wanted nothing more than for her to stay a part of my life. It's not that I chose him over her... Now on the other hand... it wouldn't even be a choice.”

“No, it wouldn't be. Your dad is awesome,” Jenny smiled. “I can't believe he got me those piano lessons as a present. I only mentioned once in passing that I'd have liked to learn how to play the piano and here he goes and gets me lessons...”

“Dad is pretty over the top when it comes to presents,” Gus chuckled, shaking his head in amusement. “Papa always has a hard time stopping him from spoiling us too much. If it hadn't been for Papa vetoing him a couple of times, I am sure I would have gotten horses, trips to wherever I wanted to go and a Ferrari for my 18th birthday.”

Jenny chuckled, then turned more serious. “It just feels like he gets me, you know? Like he understands me at times when no one else does.”

Luke frowned for a second, then looked at Gus who just nodded which confused Luke even more.

“I think it's because he feels a kinship with you. He feels like what you're going through with Melanie is a lot like what he went through with his parents... and... I think even though it's not his fault, he feels like he should make it up to you in whatever way he can because he's been through it himself and knows how much it sucks,” Gus said slowly.

Jenny nodded. “Yeah, I think you might be right. He told me about his parents and... it sounds pretty horrible what he went through.”

Gus sounded serious when he spoke next. “He doesn't really talk about his parents much... at least he never really did with me. Most of what I know, I know from Papa. They really fucked him up from all I heard and... I guess lucky for us, he knew that he never wanted to be like them and wanted to do better than they had done with him. I think he's been such a great Dad to us because he knows how much it sucks to have bad parents and he never wanted that for us.”

“I really like him and I think he's a wonderful person. Both your dads are,” Jenny said. “Really, everyone in the family seems so nice. I mean, even Grandma Jen told me to call her Grandma and to consider her my grandma and we're not even related.”

“Yeah, she's amazing like that. I am not really related to her either, but she's never treated me differently than she'd treat Luke or Vicky. Just like Papa never did. I remember when I was small and I asked my Dad if I could call Papa Papa even though he wasn't really my father and... in his own way he tried to explain it to me even then. He said that it wasn't about who we're related to by blood, but about who we love in our hearts. And that it's okay to love our chosen family more than our real family. At the time, I was mostly happy because it meant that I could call Papa Papa, but now... that I am older... I know what he meant. Sometimes our blood relatives are a disappointment and don't love us in the way they should and as much as we might want to change that, there's nothing we can do about it, but it's okay to love other people and make them our chosen family. And... that's really what this family is, you know? A chosen family. They all chose to love each other for who they are as people, as individuals, because they love who the other person is. It's priceless really.”

“I like that,” Jenny said quietly, her voice emotional. “You don't have to love them out of a wrong sense of obligation, but you love them because you want to and actually like them. It's a nice sentiment.”

“It is, isn't it?” Gus agreed with a smile. “God knows they can be annoying as hell at times, but really, I wouldn't change any of them. They are all amazing the way they are and I really love all of them.”

“Yeah, so do I. Everyone has been so welcoming, so nice and friendly. I think I really like this family.”

“Your family,” Gus said seriously. “It's your family now as well.”

“Yeah,” Jenny agreed, a smile spreading on her face. “It's nice to finally have a family. And I think I couldn't have found a better one.”

She then turned to Luke, looking at him with a frown. “You okay? You've been awfully quiet.”

Gus now turned to Luke as well, noticing that his brother looked like he hadn't even been listening to their conversation at all. “Luke?”

“Huh? What?”

“Earth to Luke? Someone home?” Gus asked, still looking at his brother with a frown.

“Sorry, I was just thinking,” Luke muttered.

“Don't hurt your head,” Gus teased with a smirk on his face.

“Haha, very funny,” Luke muttered as he rolled his eyes.

“Okay, so what was so important that you completely ignored our conversation?” Jenny asked, slightly amused by the banter between the two brothers.

Luke shrugged, but didn't reply.

“Come on, you can tell us. It must have been pretty serious,” she said, now sounding more serious than before.

Luke sighed, then looked from her to Gus and back. “I was just wondering... what it would be like to meet them.”

“Meet who?” Gus frowned, not sure he understood what or who Luke was talking about.

“Our grandparents,” Luke said quietly, looking at his hands on the table.

“Okay, you lost me here. We have met them? Grandma Jen, Grandma Debbie, Grandpa Carl... they were all at our house just yesterday,” Gus pointed out.

“No, I don't mean them,” Luke sighed. “I mean... the grandparents that we never met. Dad's parents... though I guess that would only be his mom since his father already died... and what about Papa's dad?”

“What about them? They are fucking homophobes. Why would I want to meet them?” Gus asked.

“Aren't you interested to know what they're like?” Luke asked, looking at Gus from curious eyes.

“I can't say that I am,” Gus admitted. “Everything I have heard about them makes them sound like pretty horrible people.”

“But they're our grandparents... they're our relatives. What if... what if they have changed and aren't like that anymore,” Luke mused.

“They don't sound like the people that would change,” Gus gave back right away. “You know that Dad's mom is a crazy religious nutjob and you know that Papa's dad kicked him out of his family home when he was hardly older than you're now just because he's gay.”

“But what if they regret their behaviour now and feel sorry about it?” Luke asked.

“Why would they?” Gus frowned.

“I don't know... Dad was sure that he had done the right thing and had been right in lying to Papa. He wasn't, he regretted and everyone forgave him. What if... what if they regret as well? Shouldn't they be given a second chance as well?”

“Only I don't think they regret anything,” Gus pointed out quietly.

“What if they do and just never had a chance to tell Papa or Dad?” Luke muttered.

“Luke, look, I am not quite sure why you would think that... if they really wanted to let Dad and Papa know that they had changed... there would have been ways. Grandma Deb knows Dad's mom. Aunt Molly is still in contact with Papa's dad. If they really wanted to say something to Dad and Papa... there would have been ways.”

Luke considered what Gus had said, then nodded. “I guess, but... you have really never been interested in meeting them?”

“No, why? They're horrible people. Why would I want to let people like them into my life?”

Luke shrugged. “Because they're your family. Your grandparents,” he then looked up at Gus, “what about your mom's parents? Have you never wanted to meet them?”

“Not really, no.”

“Aren't you interested in her family at all?” Luke asked, not able to understand why Gus seemed to have so little interest in meeting the other members of his family.

“Look, from what I remember, they weren't even a part of my life when she was still in my life and after... well, after she went to prison... they never tried to get in contact.”

“How do you know?” Now it was Jenny who had asked the question, looking at Gus from curious eyes.

“Because Dad would have told me,” Gus said, sounding absolutely sure.

“Would he, though? He never liked them and you know he lied to Papa... how can you be so sure that he hasn't lied to you?” Luke asked.

“Because he wouldn't have,” Gus said, his voice still without any doubt. “Even though he doesn't like them, he knows they're my family and if they would have wanted to see me... He wouldn't have kept that from me. He would have let me make my own decision, even if he might have hated that decision. Come on, Luke. You know Dad! He would have been honest about them getting in contact, he would have been honest about them wanting to see me and he would have let me make my decision, no matter how much he might have hated it. But they never got in contact, so there was never any decision to make.”

“Aren't you interested in getting to know them?” Luke asked. “To see what they are like?”

“No, I am not,” Gus now sounded slightly annoyed. “I have a family that loves me and that I love. Why would I care about some douchebags who have obviously never cared about me?”

“Don't you want to find out why they never cared?” Luke kept on asking.

“No, I don't have to. I know. They're homophobes. Dad's mom is, Papa's dad is and my mother's parents are. They're all people who cast out their own children because of something they had no choice in. Because of something that shouldn't matter at all. I don't want to have hateful people like that in my life,” Gus said, his voice leaving no doubt that this was his final word on the matter.

“Well, I want to meet them,” Luke then announced.

“What?” Gus looked as if Luke had just grown a second head.

“What?” Jenny asked as well, sounding equally confused.

“I want to meet them,” Luke repeated calmly, looking from Gus to Jenny and back. “I want to get to know them. They're my grandparents. And... if you're right and they're just homophobic assholes... well, at least I'll know then. But I want to make up my own mind about them.”

“Luke, that's crazy,” Gus said, shaking his head. “You know what they're like.”

“No, I don't,” Luke said hotly. “I don't know them. I've only heard stories, but I've never met them. And they're my family, so I want to. I want to make up my own mind about my grandparents. And I don't need you to like it or approve of it. This is what I want to do and I'll do it.”

“You can't, Luke,” Gus almost pleaded now. “How would you even go about it?”

“You said it yourself. Grandma Debbie knows Dad's mom, Aunt Molly knows Papa's dad. They must know where they live. Maybe they're even listed on the internet.”

“Dad and Papa won't like it,” Gus said calmly, hoping to make his brother see how foolish he was behaving. “They'll be pissed.”

“Why? You said that they would let us make our own decisions even if they didn't like those decisions. Well, this is my decision. I want to meet my grandparents.”

Gus shook his head. “What I meant is, they would let us make our own decisions after talking it over with us. Do you intend to talk it over with them?” He asked, already knowing the answer before Luke gave it.

“They would only try to talk me out of it. I'll do this, Gus. Whether you like it or not.”

“Luke, this is crazy,” Gus said quietly, looking at his brother intently. “This can only end badly.”

“What's the worst that can happen?” Luke asked. “That I realise that they are assholes and I end up with the same grandparents in my life that have always been around? Doesn't sound like such a bad outcome...”

“And what do you think would be the best that could happen?” Jenny asked carefully, not sure she wanted to hear the answer.

“Maybe they've changed. Maybe they might have problems with Dad and Papa, but want to get to know me... us...”

“Luke, I think Gus is right. This sounds like a bad idea,” Jenny agreed with her older brother.

Luke just shrugged. “I don't need either of you to approve. I am old enough to go and meet them on my own.”

“This is crazy,” Gus just muttered, shaking his head. “Why would you want to do such a thing?”

“I told you, they're my family. I want to make up my own mind about them,” Luke replied calmly.

“You're going to be in so much trouble if Dad and Papa find out,” Gus said, looking at his brother darkly. “Do you realise that?”

“Why? Who says they even need to know?”

“Luke, these things always come out.”

“If I don't tell them and you and Jenny won't... No one needs to know...”

“Luke, I agree with Gus. I don't like this...,” Jenny said quietly. “At least talk it over with your dads first.”

“Why? They're my grandparents, not mass murderers. What do you think is going to happen? The worst that will happen is that they will send me away and that's it,” Luke said, then got up and grabbed his jacket.

“Where are you going?” Jenny frowned.

“To see if I can find out their addresses,” Luke said, then headed for the door of the diner.

“Right now?” Gus' eyes widened. “Are you for real?”

“No time like the present, right?” Luke replied without even turning around to look at them.

“Is he fucking crazy?” Gus asked wide-eyed before he turned to Jenny. “What the fuck?”

“I think this really means a lot to him,” Jenny tried to reason. “He really seems to want to do this.”

“God, this can only end badly,” Gus said, before he got up as well. “Better stop him before he gets himself into some trouble.”

Jenny nodded as she looked at him while he put on his scarf and jacket. “Let me know if you were able to change his mind, okay?”

“Yeah, will do,” he said, before he quickly kissed her cheek, then turned to leave after his wayward brother.

***

“Brian?” Justin looked troubled as he made his way into their gym where Brian was trying to run off some of the extra calories he had consumed over Christmas.

Brian looked up from the treadmill and immediately stopped it when he saw the troubled expression on Justin's face. “What's going on?”

“Mom called,” Justin only said which didn't really explain anything to Brian.

“Is she okay?” He asked, wondering if something bad might have happened.

“She had a call from Craig,” Justin continued, looking at Brian from still troubled eyes.

“Okay,” Brian muttered, not quite sure what to make of that. “What about?”

“Where did Gus and Luke say they were going?” Justin asked instead of giving him an answer.

“To meet with Jenny for lunch at the diner,” Brian frowned, wondering why Justin would ask him that. He had been present when the boys had announced their plans earlier that morning. And he wasn't sure what that question had to do with Jen's call, though he would find out a second later why Justin had asked.

“She said Craig called her because... because Gus and Luke showed up at his house.”

Brian looked at Justin as if he was crazy. “They what?”

“He said they came to see him.”

“That can't be right,” Brian muttered. “They're at lunch with Jenny.”

“Brian, why would he say something like that if... Mom said he was really angry... called them disrespectful and told her to make sure they never come to see him again,” Justin continued.

“Why would they?” Brian asked, looking at Justin in total confusion. “That doesn't make sense.”

“I don't know,” Justin muttered, seeming utterly shocked by what his mother had told him, clearly still trying to come to grips with it.

Chapter 34

The moment Gus opened the door and entered the house, he knew they were in trouble. He just felt a weird atmosphere all over the house and the second he stepped into the hallway and heard his Dad's voice, he knew that they had been found out.

“Gus? Luke? Come to the living-room.”

Gus threw an angry look towards his younger brother who still seemed to be hanging on to his own thoughts.

“Great,” he muttered as he got out of his jacket and watched Luke do the same. “I told you they would find out.”

“You don't know that they know,” Luke muttered as he got out of his own jacket.

“Luke! Gus! Living-room, now!” Brian repeated, his voice sounding more angry than it had seconds ago.

Gus just threw his brother a look that said 'Think again', then took a deep breath and made his way towards the living-room.

“Hey, Dad. What's up?” He tried to act as nonchalantly as he could as he entered the room and saw his fathers sitting on the sofa. He could immediately see the blank expression on his dad's face that told him he was really angry, but trying to hide it, but even more than that, his Papa's troubled expression told him that they were in deep shit.

“Cut the bullshit and sit down,” Brian said, nodding towards the other sofa. “Where were you this afternoon?”

Gus looked at Luke, urging him to tell the truth and he sighed inwardly when he heard Luke's answer to their Dad's question.

“At lunch with Jenny. We told you.”

“We know that's not true,” Justin said quietly, meeting Luke's gaze head-on. “Try again, this time with the truth.”

“It is the truth. We went to the diner and had lunch with Jenny. Ask Gus,” Luke replied once more.

“Fine, where did you go after lunch?” Brian asked once more, looking first at Gus, then at Luke.

“Dad,” Gus began, sighing deeply, “I am sorry.”

“Sorry? What for? You still haven't answered my question,” Brian said in a deathly calm voice.

“You already know, don't you?” Gus just said, meeting his father's eyes before he moved on to look at his Papa.

“Why?” Was all Justin asked, holding Gus' gaze.

“It wasn't...,” Gus started, but was interrupted by Luke who answered instead.

“Why not? They're our grandparents!”

“They?” Justin frowned, sharing a quick look with Brian who looked equally surprised by that statement.

“Your father and Dad's mom,” Luke replied rather defiantly.

“My mother?” Brian's eyes widened, clearly showing the shock on his face at that admission. It was quite obvious to both Gus and Luke that this hadn't been something their fathers had known and that their Dad was obviously not able to hide his surprise at that admission.

“Wait, you... didn't know?” Luke said slowly, his eyes widening when he realised that their parents hadn't been aware of that part of their afternoon activities.

“The truth. Now!” Brian just gritted out, looking at both his sons from steely eyes.

Justin could hear the tension in his husband's voice and immediately rested a hand on his arm to try and calm him down.

“We know you went to see my father. I guess now we also know that you went to see your Dad's mother,” Justin said quietly, his voice showing suppressed anger and most of all confusion. “Why?”

“They're our grandparents, why not?” Luke said, his voice sounding like the bratty teenager that he was.

“They're not your grandparents,” Justin said calmly, still resting his hand on Brian's arm. He could feel the tension in his husband and knew that the information about Gus and Luke also going to see his mother had changed the whole situation for him. Before Brian had been the calm one and had urged Justin to stay calm and give the boys a chance to explain why they would have gone and visited his father, but now that they knew the boys had also gone to see Joan Kinney, Justin had a feeling that Brian's earlier calm was long forgotten and had left the building minutes ago.

“Of course they are,” Luke argued. “They are your parents. That makes them our grandparents.”

“Debbie and Carl are your grandparents. Jen is your grandmother,” Brian pressed out, struggling to stay calm. “Craig Taylor and Joan Kinney are a lot of things, but they are not your grandparents.”

“Dad,” Gus said quietly, looking at his father. “Luke just wanted to meet them to see what they were like. He thought... he thought that maybe they had changed and... that maybe they deserved a second chance and... would be interested in getting to know us.”

Brian just snorted. “Yeah, as if...”

“Why not?” Luke replied angrily. “You changed, didn't you? Everyone has been telling me for weeks how much you have changed. Why couldn't they have changed as well? Do you think you're the only person on this planet to ever change?”

“Luke,” Justin said, trying to stay calm before the situation got out of hand. “That's not the same...”

“Why not? You gave Dad a second chance... Everyone gave Dad a second chance... Why wouldn't your parents have deserved the same second chance?”

“Because you need to regret your actions and you need to feel sorry for what you've done to even start to deserve forgiveness,” Justin said seriously. “And they don't.”

“How do you know that they don't? You haven't talked to them in how many years?” Luke asked.

“Well, from the sounds of it, it doesn't seem like Craig was asking for your forgiveness, was he?” Brian muttered. “We know he kicked you out and he made it very clear what he thought of you, your visit and that he never wanted to see either of you again...”

Gus frowned and dared to ask the question that really interested him. “He called you?”

Justin shook his head. “He would never call either of us. He called your Grandma Jen and tore into her...”

“Shit,” Gus muttered, running a hand over his face. He hadn't wanted to get his grandma into any trouble with her ex-husband. “We didn't mean to,” he started, but never got any further.

“So what did you mean to achieve?” Brian asked, his voice making it very clear that he was not amused and wanted answers.

When Luke stayed quiet, Gus looked angrily at his brother, then decided to answer his father's question.

“Luke wanted to meet them. Wanted to see if they were really as bad as we've been told or might have changed and might be interested in getting to know us and...,” Gus stopped then, not quite sure how to continue.

“I've heard Luke's name a lot now, but from what I hear, you went along on these little visits,” Brian pointed out.

“I just wanted to make sure he didn't get himself into trouble,” Gus defended himself weakly. “You can ask Jenny. She can tell you that I thought it was a stupid idea.”

“And yet you went along on these visits,” Justin said quietly as a statement, not a question.

“Yeah, because...,” Gus sighed, then ran a hand through his hair. “Because I had a feeling this would end badly, okay? And I didn't want Luke to be on his own when he met them. I have heard all the stories, I had no doubt that they wouldn't have changed at all, but... he got it in his head that... that they might have, just like you did,” he said as he looked right at his Dad. “And...I thought it was best if he wasn't alone when he met them.”

“It's not Gus' fault,” Luke said quietly, not looking at anyone, but at his hands. “I would have gone with or without him. He didn't want me to meet them on my own, so he came along... I didn't really give him a choice.”

“Everyone has a choice,” Brian said darkly, but stopped when Justin looked at him and shook his head slowly.

He had heard something in Luke's voice, something he had also heard in Gus' voice earlier and no matter how angry he was about these visits, what he had heard worried him. Both boys seemed rather disappointed and sad. And not because they had been found out, this was about something else.

“So, did the visits go like you had imagined them to go?” Justin asked slowly, trying to keep his voice void of anger.

Luke just shook his head, still not looking up from where his gaze was focused on his hands. “No,” he said in a voice hardly above a whisper, all his earlier defiance now gone from his voice.

“What happened?” Justin asked equally quiet, now wondering what had happened that afternoon. So far they only knew the version his father had told his mother, but Justin wasn't sure how much of that could be trusted.

“You were right, okay? Both of you were right,” Luke exclaimed, looking up at his fathers, his eyes glassy with unshed tears. “They are horrible people... horrible, disgusting people.”

“Luke,” Gus said slowly, looking at his brother from concerned eyes.

“You were right. Happy? They are exactly like you told us... They haven't changed a bit. They said...horrible, disgusting things and... I am sorry I ever thought they might have deserved a second chance.”

Justin could see the tears on Luke's face and despite his anger his heart broke for his son. “What happened?” He asked gently, looking from Gus to Luke, listening as they told the story of their visits to their parents.

“Luke, this is a bad idea,” Gus said after Luke had rung the doorbell and they waited to see if Craig Taylor was home.

Before Luke could answer, the door was opened and a man in his sixties who had clearly seen better days in life opened the door. “What do you want?” He asked, not impolitely as he looked at the two boys outside his door.

“Craig Taylor?” Luke asked, though it was quite obvious that this was his father's father. There was a certain family likeness that told him as much.

The man nodded, his eyes focused on the young boy.

Both Gus and Luke saw the moment he realised who Luke was. His face immediately darkened and anger entered his voice when he spoke next.

“What do you want here? Did your disgusting father send you?”

“Now wait a minute,” Gus immediately said, not liking what this man had said about his father. He never got any further though, when Craig Taylor turned to him.

“Oh, you look just like him, don't you? Are you a fag as well?”

“There is no need for such language,” Gus said calmly, looking Craig Taylor straight in the eye.

“Oh, there is need for such language. Do you know what your father is? A disgusting pedophile that corrupts innocent young boys and pulls them into his claws. Get away from my doorstep, Kinney.”

“It's Kinney-Taylor,” Gus gave back, looking the man right in the eye. “My fathers got married.”

“Your fathers?” Craig Taylor snorted. “It is clear who your father is and I am sorry to have ever made his acquaintance. That man destroyed my family with his disgusting lifestyle. Married? Pah, as if... I know that he likes to fuck everything that moves and has two legs and a dick between them. Everyone knows what a slut he is. Has he gotten Aids yet? It's the least he deserves.”

“Excuse me?” Gus' eyebrows rose comically. “Are you for real?”

“Oh, didn't anyone ever tell you the truth about your father? Yeah, I am not surprised Justin wouldn't have told you. He has always been bewitched by Kinney and his dark ways. It's a shame he turned towards this disgusting lifestyle and chose it over his own family.”

“He didn't choose anything,” Gus gave right back. “Homosexuality is not a choice.”

“Yeah, that's what they would have told you, right? Have you ever seen the inside of a church? Ever heard the gospel? The word of God? I should have sent him away to military school and should have made him go to Dartmouth. He could have met a nice girl there, gotten married, had kids with her. Instead he chose this disgusting lifestyle, became a degenerate and an embarrassment to the Taylor name.”

“He is married. He has kids. Your son is an internationally renowned artist with a great career. If anyone is an embarrassment to the Taylor name, it would be you,” Gus shot back. “What does your church, your God say about a man that cheats on his wife? Huh? How do they think about that? You dare to sit on your high horse and condemn your own son for something he had no choice in when you made bad choice after bad choice. You say my Dad destroyed your family? From what Grandma Jen has said, you did quite a fine job of that on your own with your constant cheating.”

“How dare you?” Craig Taylor nearly yelled. “Your disgusting father destroyed my family. We were a happy family before he showed up and took Justin away and corrupted him with his gay lifestyle.”

“Yeah, not what I have heard. How about you take a long, hard look in the mirror and ask yourself how your beloved God thinks about cheaters and people that willfully set out to injure other people,” with that last parting shot, Gus turned around to his brother who had been awfully quiet throughout the whole exchange. “I am out of here. I hope you got what you came here for. I will not listen to this homophobe talk about my parents like that.”

Luke looked from Gus, who was going back to the car to Craig Taylor who looked angrily after him. “I... I am your grandson,” he said, but stopped when Craig Taylor's angry face turned to meet his. “Justin is my father.”

“You are nothing to me. I don't have a son and I don't have a grandson. You are a disgusting spawn of a sinful lifestyle. Get out of here. If I ever see you here again, I will have you arrested for trespassing.”

Luke watched wide-eyed after Craig Taylor as he went back inside his house and slammed the door shut in his face.

Twenty minutes later they pulled up in front of Joan Kinney's house.

“I can't believe that you still want to go and meet her. Not after how that visit to Papa's Dad went,” Gus shook his head angrily.

“She might not be the same as him,” Luke said weakly.

“You didn't even defend them. You just let him say these horrible things about both Dad and Papa,” Gus accused angrily, throwing a glare at his younger brother.

“I was too shocked to say anything,” Luke tried to defend himself, but knew that Gus was right. He should have spoken up, he should have said something when Craig Taylor had said those horrible, homophobic things about his family. And he hadn't.

“Yeah, whatever,” Gus muttered anrgily, as he opened the door of the car and got out.

When Luke got out as well and headed towards the door, Gus called after him. “I don't need a repeat of what happened earlier. I'll wait here.”

“Gus?” Luke asked, looking at his brother in confusion.

“I know how this will end and I've had my share of homophobic bullshit for one day. You want to hear more shit like that? Be my guest, I'll wait here.”

Luke watched as Gus got back into the car and slammed the door shut. He nodded to himself, then headed up the few steps to the door of the house and rang the bell.

If Gus didn't want to meet his grandmother, fine by him. He wanted to. Maybe she was different than Craig Taylor.

Luke rang the bell twice more and was about to head back to the car, thinking that no one was home when the door was opened after several minutes. He saw an old woman who was clearly inebriated lean heavily against the door.

“Who are you?” she slurred in question.

“I am Luke Kinney-Taylor,” he introduced himself. “I am your grandson.”

“You are not John or Peter,” the old woman replied, clearly having trouble getting out her words. “Kinney-what?”

“Kinney-Taylor,” Luke repeated, feeling quite disgusted by the smell of alcohol that made its way over to him from the old woman. She smelled like a liquor store. Not that he had ever been in one, but he imagined that this was what they smelled like. Or shitty bars. “I am Brian's son.”

“Brian?” The woman frowned, clearly trying to process that information. Her face lit up slightly. “He found a woman after all, huh?”

“A woman?” Luke frowned.

“Who gave him a beautiful son like you,” the woman said, her words hard to understand due to how drunk she was.

“No, he carried me. He got pregnant by my father, Justin Kinney-Taylor.”

“He carried you?” She was nearly screeching now and Luke couldn't help but take a step back.

“He's got the male pregnancy gene and he carried me and my sister, Vicky,” Luke explained. “My dads got married last year.”

“Sinners!” Joan Kinney exclaimed, raising a fist to the heavens. “How dare he go against God's creation like that?”

Luke frowned, not quite sure what she meant by that. “A lot of men have the male pregnancy gene and can have children. That's not going against God's creation.”

“The bible clearly states that a family is a man and a woman who have children together when married. This is sacrilege!”

“I don't agree,” Luke said weakly, honestly quite intimidated by the drunk woman's screeching.

“One day God will come down and will punish you all for this sacrilege! You will be punished for your insolence and for disrespecting his ways. I've told Brian many times before, but has he listened to me? You'd think after God gave him cancer, he would have learned his lesson, but...”

“You think God gave my Dad cancer?” Luke's eyes widened.

“It was a warning. To make him see that he was on a path straight to hell. But would Brian ever listen? No, of course not... He always knew better than the Lord... What an insolent boy he has always been. No wonder his father had to discipline him so much as a boy,” the woman slurred, waving her index finger in his face. “He should have been stricter with him, alas.”