With this Ring

The first six months had been wonderful.They had decided to live in the city for now. Justin was taking some final courses to graduate and Kinnetik was thriving under Brian’s leadership.  Kinnetik had an opportunity to expand to the West Coast and after Brian took a trip to California to look things over, Justin had some questions for him.

Brian knew it wasn’t a good idea. The client he had met with suggested they go out his last night in town.  He knew he shouldn’t but when the client offered him a popper, he took it. The music was great and as he stood on the edge of the dance floor, a cute blond motioned him over. Damn, he shouldn’t have taken the drugs.  Well, a little exercise would do him good. He moved out onto the floor.  The music bounced around his head while the beautiful man in front of him moved closer, running his hand down Brian’s chest. He wished Justin was here.

Justin woke up at 3:00 am.  He felt the beat on his finger.  Brian’s heart rate was speeding up.  It was only midnight there. Could he have decided to work out this late? Justin smiled to himself, maybe Brian was thinking about him. That made his pulse increase.  He pictured Brian’s long, lean body and reached for a vibrater. He hated it when Brian was gone.  They belonged together.

Brian felt the rhythm of Justin’s  heartbeat increase but didn’t think much about it once he felt the hand slide into his fly.  No, he shouldn’t.  Why couldn’t he think? What had he taken? Why did he feel so…

Justin hated cumming alone.  It was so empty. He also hated what he was thinking, feeling the ring beat so fast. Justin laid there, waiting for the Brian’s heartbeat to slow. An hour later it finally felt back to normal.

Brian woke up in the back of a cab.  Fuck, what had he taken? He remembered moving out to dance with that kid and remembered the kid reaching into his pants but after that everything was just images in a dream. He had no idea how he had gotten in here.

“Buddy, we’re at your hotel.” The driver told Brian how much he owed.

“Thanks,” Brian mumbled and handed him a couple bills. He struggled out of the back of the car and then stood up as straight as he could and walked into the hotel where he crashed.  The next time he woke up it was 10:00 am and he knew he had missed his flight.  He managed to get  a flight out later that afternoon and then he called Justin.

Justin answered quickly, “Hey, Brian, are you at the airport? You should be taking off pretty soon.”

“Um, I had to switch to a later flight.  I went out with some of the guys last night and …”

“I knew it! Fucking all night tends to be cause to oversleep.”

“Whoa, calm down.  I can feel your heart rate rising. I slept alone Justin.”

“Well last night your heart beat was flying. What time did he leave?”

“Justin, I need to pack and get to the airport.  My flight is going to land around 8:00.  Will you pick me up or do I need to order a car?”

“Send me the information,” he said and hung up. “Damn!” he shouted in the empty loft. The remainder of the day, Justin did what he needed to do but Brian and last night wouldn’t leave his mind.  He decided he would pack a bag and unless Brian had a good explanation, he would go stay with a friend tonight. He thought about Ben and Michael but he didn’t know if he could face Michael tonight.  He would crash at Daphne’s.  He was glad she decided to get her master’s in Pittsburgh. He liked having her close.  Maybe Brian had a good reason for everything that happened. He hoped so.  He was sure he would know as soon as he talked to him. He always knew if Brian was holding something back.  He wouldn’t lie but he would omit.

Justin placed his duffel behind the driver seat.  He knew Brian would drive home so if he needed to get out he could reach over and grab his bag before moving. He planned it if necessary.  If he believed Brian, he would just leave the bag and grab it out tomorrow and Brian would never know.

As he drove to the airport his mind went back to the last six months.  It had really been like a fairytale.  He could still picture Brian as they walked in from opposite sides of the room and met in the middle.  Seeing Brian coming toward him and knowing that gorgeous, successful man loved him. They knew it wouldn’t be easy but it would be harder apart. They both knew they would look and they both had agreed it wasn’t an open relationship but it was an equal relationship. Any decision that would affect both of them would be made by both of them.  

Brian’s trip to California had caused a little tension right away.  The plans were made before Justin knew about it and when he pointed it out, Brian insisted it was a work thing, not a couple thing. Justin had known that was true and yet it would change things for them as a couple. If Brian split his time, Justin would have to either move back and forth or they would be apart. 

Brian still felt like he had a hangover.  Whatever was in that popper he did last night? He knew Justin was going to question him about it and he really didn’t know what happened.  He had never lied to him and he wouldn’t start now but he wasn’t sure what he would say either. 

By the time Brian was off the plane and waiting for Justin to pull up.  He realized how much he had missed him.  All he wanted to do was kiss him and then take him home to bed. 

Brian looked up and saw Justin pulling into a spot nearby. Justin spotted him and his thought of leaving tonight went out the window. It had only been 4 days but his body longed to feel his touch.  As Brian approached, Justin opened the door and ran into Brian’s arms.

“I missed you,” Brian said before lowering his mouth and claiming Justin’s.  Justin’s response showed he felt the same. After several minutes in each other’s arms the police officer walked over and asked them to move on. As Justin suspected Brian got behind the wheel and soon they were on the way back to the city. Both felt the other's heartbeat take time to return to normal. They held hands but didn’t say anything for several miles. “Sunshine, I…”

“Bri, can we just talk about your business right now? Have you made any decisions? Are you going to open a branch over there?”

Brian brought Justin’s hand to his mouth. “I have some numbers I need to have Ted check out but I don’t think…” Brian hesitated.  “I’m sorry, Sunshine.  You were right about deserving to have a say in something this big.”

“Thank you.”

“I might look into it sometime when WE think it's a good time.” Brian glanced at Justin,  “Have you noticed?”

“Noticed?” he paused, “Our rings are in sync.” Their hearts beat as one.

Brian pulled into their parking spot and, after putting the car in park, he reached for Justin again, pulling him over to him, “Damn, I love you.”

“I love you, too, Brian.” 

They entered the building and as the lift took them upward they began to undress each other, both feeling the other's heartbeat quicken.  Justin and Brian shifted dominance. First Brian pressed Justin against the wall and then Justin took control as they slid the door open and stumbled into the hall. As he undid Brian’s fly, Brian unlocked the door to the loft and they both nearly fell in. Somehow they locked up the apartment and stumbled to the bedroom leaving clothes along the way. 

And then Brian was buried inside him. They moved as one and as the tension grew within they found release at the same time. Neither was ready to separate as they continued to touch and kiss for several more moments but eventually Brian rolled on his back and started to pull Justin into his arms. 

Justin held his ground and turned to look at him. “What did you do last night?”

“I’m not sure,” Brian answered honestly.  He explained to Justin what had happened. “I had no intention of fucking him. He moved in but I don’t remember anything else until I was at the hotel.”

“Well, your heart was racing and…”

Brian pulled a reluctant Justin to him.  He nuzzled his neck. “I was an ass for taking the popper. I won’t do that again. Now, say you aren’t mad any more and kiss me.” Justin gave in and kissed him.  As Brian let his fingers move down Justin’s back, he whispered, “I love you, Sunshine. Please trust me.”

The next week was busy for both of them.  Justin was finishing up several projects for school.  He was so over college but he was excited to start using the skills he had learned.  He was going to work part time at Kinnetik and the rest of the time he would be working on his art. He had already gotten studio space at a small art gallery where many of the promising artists from Pittsburgh had started.  He was already working from that spot.  Justin looked at the project he was working on.  Most of his work he had completed on campus but this last project, he didn’t want anyone from the college to see it before it was finished.

Brian had texted him that he had a late meeting and wouldn’t be home until around 8:00 p.m. so Justin continued to work.  He was working on his final sculpture project and, if he wanted to be home when Brian got there, he needed to be done for the night. He had ditched his shirt long ago. He was covered with bits of clay and plenty of water but he had learned long ago it was much easier to get the residue off his skin than out of the fabric. 

By this time of night he expected to be alone in the building but, once in the hall, he heard noise coming from somewhere.  Towel in hand, he wiped at his chest and arms as he walked down the hall. There was light streaming out of a door and Justin walked down to look inside.  There was a stunning young woman standing in front of a delicate statue of children and a puppy. He stood there and watched her moving around it. It was done so well, he almost thought he saw one of the kids move. How could you get metal so lifelike?

The artist started dancing to unheard music and as she turned and caught sight of Justin in the doorway, she stopped and let out a little squeak.  She pulled headphones off her ears.

“Sorry, if I scared you.  I just heard you and got curious.”

“You’re Taylor, right?”

“Ya, Justin,” he took a step toward her and they shook hands.  “This statue is amazing! I’m not sure I have ever seen anything so… well, absorbing. I mean I can hear them laugh.”

“I’m Tally.  Thanks.  I have seen your work.  It is strong, defined.  It makes you feel.  You’re going to stay here and work, when you finish school, right?”

“Ya, I will be working for my husband part time and on my art here, the rest of the time.”

As Brian drove home, Justin’s heartbeat did a flutter.  Brian smiled at first.  He usually felt that when Justin was on the elevator to the loft or as he walked into Brian’s office.  When they first were married he had called it the Brian flutter. Was someone in the lift at the apartment and Justin thought it was him? He hoped Justin was home.  Brian just wanted to spend the night with his husband.  They had both been so busy and he knew Justin believed him about the night at the club but he wasn’t happy about it.  If Justin didn’t have dinner ready they would order in.  He knew Justin was in a push right now and he wanted to do anything to make his life as simple as he could. 

As he pulled into the parking spot, he felt Justin’s heart speed up a bit.  He felt Justin’s heart speed up a bit again. He just wanted to hold him at that moment. It wouldn’t be long now.

“Since you’re here would you mind helping me?”

“What do you need?” Justin asked cheerfully.

“I am finally finished with this one.  That’s where the little dance came in. I need to move it off this table and over to that spot over there.  That corner is too dark to actually work in.”

“This doesn’t look too heavy.”  Justin walked up to it, looking at it closely.  “Tally, you are amazingly talented. How do you get the figures so detailed and yet none of them stands out over the others?”

“This did turn out well. Ready to move this?” Tally and Justin carefully slid the metal work to the edge of the. Justin’s heart rate started to rise a bit.  It was heavier than he thought it would be and when Tally stumbled over a table leg he caught the full weight until she could regain her footing. “Damn, I’m sorry!  You saved it!”

By the time they had it back on a sturdy table, Justin’s heart was racing. “That thing is heavier than I thought.”

“If it wasn’t for you, it would have definitely been banged up. Have a drink with me.  I always have a bottle of whiskey here.”

“Can I take a rain check? I need to get home.” He took a deep breath, slowing his heartbeat down.  “He realized by now Brian would at least be on his way home and he would be wondering what was going on. Maybe he would shower here before going home. Once he was back in his space he texted Brian and said he had gotten sidetracked and would be there in thirty minutes. He then got in the shower, washing off all the clay residue. By the time he got out he had missed a text and a call from him.  The text mentioned dinner so Justin shot back with ‘on my way. Order anything.  I’m starving.’ With that, Justin threw his keys in the air, catching them and with a little smile on the corners of his lips, he went out to drive home.

Brian ordered Thai and it arrived just as Justin pulled into the parking lot.  He verified it was paid for along with a tip and carried the bag into the building and onto the lift. When he reached the loft, Brian was standing in the doorway.  He took the bag holding dinner and walked into the loft. Justin followed.

“Sorry I’m later than I expected. I was so covered with clay, I decided to shower at the studio.” 

Brian set the food on the counter and turned on him.  “Who’d you shower with?”

Justin had felt Brian’s heartbeat increasing but he hadn’t expected that question.  “Have you seen the size of that shower? There is no way to share it.” Justin saw Brian’s eyes grow black.

“Brian, you trust me don’t you? I was just at the studio working.”

“I know your heartbeat when you are working.  I mean it goes up sometimes when you are in your world.  It goes up a bit if you like the way it is going but you spiked like you were at the gym or fucking someone.  That guy in the next room? He always watches your ass.”

“Can we eat while the food is hot?” He pulled dishes out of the cabinet and then took them and the bag to the coffee table and dropped to the floor. 

Brian reluctantly sat down next to him. He put some food onto his plate and then, without looking at him he said softly, “Sunshine, what were you doing?”

“I was helping Tally, she has a studio down the hall, moving her sculpture.  I am sure my heartbeat went up when she tripped and I was holding the whole thing.”

“So you knew I would think that?”

“Of course I did.  You are nothing if not predictable when it comes to your jealousy.”  Justin draped an arm around Brian’s shoulder and kissed his cheek. “You know I only love you and I would not break my vows, not after it took me so long to get you.”  He moved to kiss Brian again but Brian was moving away.

“So you knew I would be thinking the worst and you couldn’t tell me without drawing it out like this.”  Justin was surprised he looked really angry.”

“Brian, I was just trying to have you see…”

“There is a difference.  I was drugged.  You knew…” 

Justin jumped up.  “So because I’m not stupid enough to take something a stranger offers me, I did something stupid?”  He realized he had never taken the bag out of his SUV so he grabbed his jacket and walked to the door.  He slid it all the way open and rather than taking the lift he rushed down the stairs and out the door. Once he got to the sidewalk he stopped. “FUCK.” he shouted to the empty street. He reached for his phone to call Daph and realized it was on the counter in the loft.  He got in his vehicle and drove.

Brian still sat on the floor with all the food in front of him. He started to swipe it off the table but stopped himself. He’d just turn around and have to clean it up. He probably overreacted but how could he make him think that?  And was he really that predictable?  He picked up his phone.  He would take care of this right away.  And then he heard the phone ring behind him. Shit, how could he get ahold of him now?

Justin pulled up at Daphne’s apartment. He hoped she was home and he hoped she was alone. When he got there no one answered.  He dug out the key he knew she had hidden and let himself in.  He would call her if he had his phone. He dug in her cabinets until he found a bottle of cheap vodka.  He took a swallow and realized how horrible it was. He dropped onto her sofa and it wasn’t long before he was drunk.  He hadn’t eaten since breakfast so as the buzz took over he set the bottle on the table and fell asleep.

Daphne had felt her phone vibrate while she was in the theater but she didn’t look at it until she said goodbye to her friends and got into her car.  It was a text from Brian.  ‘Is Justin with you?’  She texted back, ‘been in a movie all evening. What happened?’

‘Could he be at your place?’

‘Have you tried calling him?’

‘He left his phone here.’

She called this time, “What did you do?”

“Nice, Daphne, my husband is gone and you are antagonizing me?” He took a breath. “Sorry, I just… We were both stupid and then he left without eating and left his phone.”

“I’m on my way home.  If I find him, I’ll let you know but don’t come over unless I tell you to.”

“Just get home and tell me he’s safe.”

“Brian, he isn’t going to do anything stupid.  And remember, he loves you.” She hung up and moved toward home.  As she was looking for a spot to park she saw Justin’s SUV. Once she found a spot for herself she texted, ‘his car is here’.

As she entered her apartment she found Justin passed out on her couch. She made him a peanut butter and banana sandwich so it could soak up the booze.  She grabbed a bottle of water and walked over to him. “You know in my dreams, when I find a guy on my sofa he at least wants to sleep with me.”

“Daph, you’re home.” Justin sat up. “Sorry, I couldn’t text.  No phone.”

“You can’t be too drunk.  That bottle wasn’t full. When’s the last time you ate?”

“This morning,” he leaned against her. “Brian hates me.”

She handed him the sandwich and opened the bottle of water for him. “Brian doesn’t hate you. He loves you so much.  What happened?”

As Justin explained everything he ate the sandwich. By the time he finished his sandwich the room had stopped spinning.  He sipped the water and reached over and took Daphne’s hand. “Can you feel it?” 

She moved her finger so it rested on the outside of Justin’s wedding band. “Ya. I can feel it. You know, if I knew there was a man that loved me as much as you two love each other I’d start worrying when I didn’t feel the heartbeat.”

“Oh, Daphne, did you have to say that? I can’t believe I left my phone at home and now I can’t even call him.”

Daphne handed him her phone, “Call him.”

“I don’t know what I would say.  I left but he blew up. Damn, right now I can tell Brian is worked up again.  He isn’t exercising but he isn’t sitting on the sofa.” 

“Maybe he is worried about you.”

Justin pressed Brian on Daph’s phone he heard it ring and then to his surprise he heard a phone ring in the hall.  It was Brian’s ringtone. Justin threw the phone onto the sofa and walked to the door, opening it.

Both of them began to apologize at once. “Oh, Bri, I shouldn’t have left.  I should have let you calm down and talked it out.” 

And as Justin said that Brian was saying, “I’m sorry, Sunshine.  I over reacted. I know I let my mind go crazy.” They stepped into each other’s arms and kissed. Justin’s arms were behind Brian’s head, helping deepen the kiss.  When they backed up a fraction of an inch Brian said, “Why do you taste like peanut butter?”

“Daph made me a sandwich.”

Brian turned, keeping one arm around Justin’s waist, “Thanks for taking care of him.”

“Someone has to take care of the two of you.  Now, go home before you start undressing unless you want to let me watch.”

Justin kissed Brian’s cheek and then slipped out of his arm for a minute. He moved to Daphne and hugged her. “Thank you, Daph. Love you.”

“I love you, too, Justin. Now, stop breaking into my apartment.” Daphne kissed him before he walked back to Brian. “If you would stop doubting each other and just remember how much you love each other, this wouldn’t happen.”

Brian and Justin lay with their fingers linked staring at the ceiling. “Brian, I want to always remember your heartbeat like this.  It is steady and strong, just like you.”

“Oh Sunshine, if it is steady it is because of you.  I know we will make more mistakes but can we use these rings to make each other stronger instead of breaking us apart and making us weak?”

“Brian Kinney, the smartest thing I ever did in my life was marry you.”

“Well, the smartest thing I ever did was ask you to marry me.