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BRANDON

 

My mom was holding Katie, thrilled to have a grandchild. She told Mel, with Ted and I getting married it made Katie family to her. We let her have Katie time, before we went out to dinner together. Emmett was back from his honeymoon and told us they would love to watch her for us. Mel needed to get out of the house and not just for work. Ted was getting worried about her not even trying to meet people. Katie was a great reason, but with all the shit she went through with Lindsay, Ted thought she didn’t trust her own judgement.

 

I worried too, since Ted and I were planning on moving into our own house. Mel couldn’t use Katie to keep from getting back out there. I wanted our daughter to have well balanced parents, which meant getting her to see there was still life to be lived. We invited her to dinner with us because Ted had an idea on how to help her. I got a little worried when Mel rounded on Ted after seeing who Ted invited to dinner. Leda just laughed at Mel's glare and dragged her off to a table for two.

 

I think Ted became Mom's favorite for how he cared about the people in his life. Ted didn’t call her Wendy, but Mom, telling her he was going to start the relationship with her the way it would end. I was starting to feel like the bad son.

 

“I was thrilled when Brandon told me you agreed to go out with him. He'd been complaining you didn't seem interested.” Mom tells on me.

 

“I didn’t take him seriously at first. I was judging him as if he was someone else. Which he straightened out after our first date.” He tells her.

 

“I told him picking up random guys for the night wouldn’t have anyone believing he was really looking for a relationship.” She tells Ted.

 

“Until I met Ted, I hadn't met anyone I wanted to be with more than once.” I tell her.

 

“If you wanted anyone to take you seriously you would have been less free with the love.” Mom laughs. “How about you Ted, any relationships, before Brandon?” She asks.

 

“I was on and off with one guy. We were always in the wrong place in our lives, I’m not sorry it ended, because I met Brandon who was in the right place at the right time.” He tells her.

 

“I love you.” I tell him, kissing him.

 

“So when are you two planning to get married.” Mom rubs her hands together.

 

“Soon, he's everything I want.” I tell her.

 

MEL

 

I keep reminding myself Katie loves her father, but her father might still be dead for doing this. Leda was the ‘wild child’ phase of my life. She never wanted to settle down or have a family. Everything was the next big thrill or doing shit that could get you killed. I left her after another big fight about wanting to settle down not party my life away. Once again I'm faced with the only woman I really wanted, before I settled for Lindsay. I know that now, which makes me seem like an idiot for staying as long as I did with Lindsay. I wish I could say Lindsay was worth the time I spent in that prison of a life. Gus was the only good thing that came out of it. Why did Leda have to still be as beautiful as she was when we were together? I feel like I'm a hundred and look it too, lately.

 

“You don’t look a hundred years old.” She tells me.

 

“I'm losing my mind, I didn’t even realize I said it out loud.” I tell her.

 

“I'll agree your not looking as good as you usually do, but I heard kids do that to you.” She tells me.

 

“They also make everything else seem less important. I like that my kids need me.” I tell her.

 

“Is that why you left me and took up with ‘haughty bitch’?” She asks.

 

“What do you mean?” I ask, not wanting to explain Lindsay.

 

“We argued a lot about me not needing you. I didn’t understand why it was a problem for you. I didn’t think a relationship had to contain a weak partner while the other one had to be the strong one. It’s sounds a bit unbalanced to me. I like knowing the person I’m with can take care of herself, not depend on me to take care of everything.” She tells me.

 

“I wanted a stable life, all we did was drink, party and live like nomads. I wanted children, you didn’t.” I tell her.

 

“You never made it sound like it was important, just something you would use in a fight.” She tells me.

 

“You told me from the beginning you would never want that life.” I tell her. Thinking of what Justin went through with Brian.

 

“I loved you enough that I would have made what you wanted important. We could still have fun and have a family. One isn’t exclusive of the other.” She tells me.

 

“Leda, I left when you thought having an orgy was a way to celebrate being together for a couple of years. I wanted it just to be us.” I tell her.

 

“Is that what you want from me, or just in general?” She asks.

 

“I want to have a relationship with someone who for once, can love me like I’m the reason they wake up every morning. I saw someone I never thought could settle down manage it, and be happier than I ever thought he would be. Hell, I see it in all my friends. Ted is over his head in love with Brandon, when I thought he’d wait the rest of his life for someone else.” I tell her.

 

“Brandon would be hard for any gay man to resist, well other than that guy Lindsay wet her panties over all the time.” She tells me.

 

“Brian?” I ask, thinking she never hid it from anyone.

 

“Yeah, whatever happened to him?” She ask.

 

“He’s married to the kid he meet the night Gus was born, Justin Taylor.” I tell her.

 

“Wow, he was the one person I didn’t see settling down. Not that I knew him that well, I never liked anyone who could be friends with Lindsay.” She tells me.

 

“He isn’t anymore, Lindsay was trying to keep him and Justin apart. Justin had a child with Brian too.” I tell her.

 

“Bet that pissed off Miss Perfect. She didn’t seem to like sharing Brian with anyone, including that little whining guy.” She tells me.

 

“I could spend hours telling you the idiotic things Michael and Lindsay seem to think they could do to get Brian away from the only person he ever loved.” I tell her.

 

“How about spending hours telling me what it will take for us to try again.” She asks. “I’m not really interested in people who needed a life, but the possibility of making a life with the chick who I never forgot.” She tells me.

 

BRIAN

 

I didn’t stop Craig from meeting Hannah and Gus, but reserved the right to stop it if Craig said anything to upset Justin or the kids. I didn’t care how he felt about me, because I didn’t really see us becoming more than two people who loved Justin and my kids. Jen and Justin understood my stance on this and didn’t push me on it. Craig and I managed to be civil as he visited or came when we went to Pittsburgh. Craig knew enough not to push me either when our history wasn’t the best. I could see it bothered Justin that Craig and I barely talked to each other, but what’s to say to the man who tried to kill me one night.

 

Craig was sitting outside in the backyard and I decided to at least try to make it less tense between us. I could see he’s lost weight and was having a hard time with eating. At lunch he kept talking to the kids and pushing things around his plate instead of eating it. I knew it was all the shit they put in you that caused the lack of appetite, on top of the fact that it revisited, normally not long after you ate it.

 

“I found things that aren’t exactly my favorite foods easier to eat.” I tell him staring at the trees at the end of our property.

 

“It doesn’t matter, I want to at least make it to see the next baby.” He tells me.

 

“Are they telling you, you might not?” I ask, because no one has asked exactly what form of cancer he has.

 

“Prostate cancer isn’t exactly predictable.” He tells me, shit, any of them but that one.

 

“How late were you in catching it?” I ask.

 

“Too late for anything they're trying to work. I really just want to say fuck it and die without feeling like absolute shit everyday.” He tells me.

 

“Why haven’t you? Chemo isn’t going to get any better.” I tell him.

 

“If I can live long enough to meet the baby, it’s enough for me. I began saying to myself if I could just meet Hannah than that was all I wanted, but I’m greedy, I want to see the face of the one you're going to have. Although I might have used up all my wishes when Justin was able to forgive me for the father I was.” He tells me.

 

“Justin always had this idea in the beginning you’d get over him being gay and be the father who loved him. I tried to stop him from wishing for it, because I didn’t see it as something I could give him. I hated watching him talk to Jen and being told you wouldn’t talk to him. I knew what that was like and wanted to keep Justin from feeling it. I tried to make it so he wouldn’t think about it, but Justin’s determined to believe, even when everything tells him not to.” I tell him.

 

“You know, even Jen didn’t think you loved Justin. I can’t say I was sorry when I heard you left him behind. I really thought he would come home.” He tells me.

 

“He couldn’t live the way you told him he had to. I thought he would forget me and move on to someone who could give him the love story he wanted. Only, he was the first person I thought of when I couldn’t see my life continuing on the way it was. I let myself believe he forgot me, not knowing everything I lost when I left him. It took more than showing up at his door and expecting him to just welcome me back.” I tell him.

 

“He told us after you met you were the only person he wanted. He practically screamed he loved you to us.” He tells me.

 

“He told me too, but I didn’t see what he seemed to. I knew he was different, because I didn’t push him away, but kept wanting to see him. Of course I was also trying to live up to the hype of my reputation, and a boyfriend wasn’t on the menu. There’s just something about him that wouldn’t let me walk away from him, until I found a way by leaving. Now I know I was just avoiding what he meant to me.” I tell him.

 

“We have that in common, not understanding who we walked away from.” He tells me.

 

 

“Yeah, guess we both figured it out.” I tell him, starting to worry that Craig and I had something in common.

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