BRIAN

I held on to Craig’s hand as we stood next to Justin and Molly. Hannah and Gus stood on either side of Molly, trying to help Molly as well as Justin. I smiled down at two year old Craig, who’d given his grandfather a reason to keep fighting. Craig wanted to see his namesake do all the firsts. He was there for the first words, first steps, and the birthdays of each of his grandchildren. His death was as peaceful as his last two years, knowing his son was there for him. We respected Craig’s need to live as normally as possible, and made it possible for Craig to stay at home when the time was closer to him leaving us. He became a man I could respect, because he was able to let go of the beliefs that caused so much pain to a community that wanted nothing more than to still be seen like anyone else, as people who loved how we wanted to. He proved to me that change wasn’t impossible, but completely possible. He became a father and grandfather this family will miss. But will keep his memory alive in our hearts, for the man he proved he could be.

Craig Jr didn’t understand why his Pop Pop was sleeping and we explained the best way we could. Hannah came over and like Justin, showed me that she was wise beyond her years.

“The kids in Heaven asked Pop Pop to come and watch over us from up there.” She tells him pointing.

Gus dried his tears to help, and sat on the ground letting his brother sit in his lap. “Pop Pop told me that when I miss him to talk to him, he’ll always listen because he loves us.” Gus tells him.

I couldn’t be prouder of Hannah and Gus, because even through their own grieving their baby brother was more important to them. We waited until they lowered Craig into the ground and I told Justin to take Molly and the kids with him. I needed to tell the man who became everything to Justin and our kids thank you for giving me Justin.

“You know, I never thought I’d do anything but toast your demise. I spent my life believing that either they hate you to your face or behind your back. I respected that you hated me to my face, and hated you for the pain Justin felt. I can’t hate you anymore. You gave Justin something my family never gave me, acceptance, and a father to be proud of. You also gave me the man who believed I could love, and made it clear when I found him again there wouldn’t be any excuses he would listen to anymore. I always thought he got it from Jen, but now I know you played a hand in the man he is and will always be. I plan for Taylor Electronics to be a leader in the industry and with Justin beside me, will keep it alive for you. Rest well, knowing you were loved by all of us.” I stood while they filled the space Craig now laid, letting my own tears fall for a man I never thought I would like, but ended up loving for everything he gave us.

I walked over to Jack’s grave, able to smile for once. We were never as close as Craig and I became, but Jack tried as best he could in the small time he had. Justin asked later about my feelings for Jack, and I told him I was his son and loved him, even when it was insane to love the man who abused you. “Yes Pop, I loved you.” I whispered before heading to the next grave.

I stood at the headstone of the man who offered everything I never had in life, and the grave I didn’t visit until after everyone had left the funeral. I didn’t want to sit with the family, because the relationship I had with Vic was ours alone. I think he and Craig would have loved being surrounded by my children. I’m sure Vic would have loved rounding out Craig’s education on the world as he saw things. “You are missed, take care of Craig for Justin and me.” I tell him, ready to go back to the living.

I turned in time to see Michael holding up the tree, well really, the tree holding him up as he watched me. Michael held on to the shop for a few months before he had to close it, his drinking left little time for a job. He went back to the Big Q and only managed a stocking position this time. He was a falling down mess, who like Jack, blamed anyone but himself for his life. I walked over to him, even though we weren’t even friends anymore.

“Deb’s worried about you.” I tell him.

“She so worried that she took his side.” Michael spits out, almost falling down.

“What did you expect her to do, not marry Carl because you don’t like it?” I ask.

“I expected the people I loved to see that I was important to them.” He tells me.

“Deb couldn’t put her life on hold for you.” I tell him.

“You did for Justin. Your life could have included the person you really loved. Instead you’ll spend your life with someone who doesn’t deserve you.” He tells me.

“I left Justin because I didn’t think I deserved the love he was willing to offer me. I left our friendship because I didn’t want or need the twisted idea of love you had in your head.” I tell him.

“You loved me, I know it, whether or not you admit it.” He tells me.

“I loved Jack too, but not enough to live that life again with you.” I tell him.

“I’m nothing like your father!” He yells.

“Go back to the bar, telling everyone about the good old days, and blaming everyone for all the things you never did. Then do me a favor and lift a toast to the man you copied. You really are pathetic.” I tell him, walking away, knowing he was too drunk to do more than scream at my back.

Justin waited at the car and we got in to ride to Jen’s for a small gathering. Ted and Brandon followed with Emmett and Charles. Brandon was almost due, and loved every minute of being pregnant. He found out they were having another daughter and shared it with Craig when we were told Craig’s battle was coming to an end. The rest of us had to wait for the birth to find out. Mel took a year to believe in Leda and married her a couple of months after they moved in together. Katie was all they planned to have, because Mel knew Ted wouldn’t agree again, for Brandon’s sake.

We made Brandon partner after I had Craig, because I wanted to watch my children grow up. Like Hannah told me, she was growing all the time. I still ran things, but Justin was doing more shows and I wanted to let him have more freedom to do the shows, by helping with the kids.

Lindsay has a few more years before she gets probation. We didn’t allow contact with Gus, because all the reports Carl got told him nothing had changed for her. Alex handed her over to the prison psychiatrist, saying he didn’t have time to indulge Lindsay in her games, when there were people who wanted help. Mel made sure even if she gets out, seeing Gus was not possible. Gus hoped the way Justin did, and I wonder if Craig was right, that there were only so many miracles available, and we used them up keeping Craig alive.

I let the kids run into Grandma’s house, and stayed outside with Justin for a moment. He’d been stronger than he believed and I missed the smile I thought about on the balcony of a penthouse.

“You made everything I believed to be impossible, possible.” I tell him.

He looked up and there it was, the smile I remembered eight years later.