Close to Home

+ Eleven +

Brian sat in front of the tall windows in the loft. It was the wee small hours of the morning, some time after two. He had been unable to sleep replaying his day with Justin over and over. He could barely believe that it had happened, and it was all because of Justin.

He had been able to go out in public. He had gone to the park. He had actually talked to a stranger, a nice lady who was interested in Gus. He had gone to lunch with Justin. The waiter had treated him like a human being, not some freak. Maybe it was possible for him to have a normal life, go out in public, see his son, go to lunch.

He wondered if it was all a pipedream. Maybe today was a fluke. If he tried to do the same things tomorrow, would the outcome be different? He couldn't stand that look of pity from people. He hadn't seen it today … surprisingly. He was sure there would be looks of pity in the future if he kept going out to public places. Maybe it was significant that no one had given him that look today. Maybe the percentage of people who thought of him as pathetic was smaller than he thought. Maybe he could handle their reactions. Maybe.

He wheeled over to the computer. He wondered if BB might be on. He wanted to share his newfound freedom with someone, even if it might not last all that long. Sure enough his favorite cyber blond was there.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

PP: Hey, blondie, glad you're here.

BB: Happy to oblige. Can't you sleep either?

PP: No, I had the best day of my life today.

BB: Are you gushing, oh cynical one?

PP: Have to admit I probably am.

BB: So what has brought about this revolutionary change of attitude?

PP: He came back.

BB: The one who had you so pissed off last time, the one who hurt you, the one who couldn't wait to get away from you?

PP: That's the one.

BB: So what happened?

PP: I had it all wrong.

BB: What do you mean?

PP: He wasn't trying to escape from me. He was just busy.

BB: I'm happy for you, but what the hell was he doing that had him so busy?

PP: He's an artist like you.

BB: No shit!

PP: He's getting ready for a show.

BB: So am I.

PP: I thought you had said that.

BB: That's quite a coincidence.

PP: You can say that again.

BB: Where's his show?

PP: I never asked him.

BB: Where did he go to school?

PP: PIFA.

BB: Fuck!

PP: Why did you say that?

PP: Hello, are you there?

PP: What happened? Don't leave me hanging like this.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Brian wondered what was going on. Something wasn't right. It couldn't be that his cyber blond went to PIFA too, could it? Fuck, it couldn't be that…

Brian heard the knock on the loft door. The smile began to spread across his face. He wheeled over to the door cutting the alarm and pulling the door back. Justin stood there his megawatt smile at full voltage.

"Penis Implants for Fuller Arousal!" they both blurted out.

A pair of sheepish grins, a couple of shakes of their heads and they found themselves in each other's arms. Justin sat in Brian's lap, a place that was fast becoming his favorite spot to be.

"How could we not have known?" Justin asked after he gave Brian a soft, sweet kiss.

"We're fucking stupid!" Brian teased.

"I guess it never occurred to me that my net friend could be so close to home. I thought you probably lived in New York or Florida or … someplace exciting."

"Anywhere but fucking Pittsburgh!"

"Yeah."

"I can't believe I told you all that stuff about the guy who hurt me," Brian admitted feeling self-conscious and a little ashamed of his lack of faith in Justin.

"I didn't know until a few minutes ago that it was me you were talking about. I totally sympathized with you. Your guy sounded like a total jerk."

"But that jerk was you."

"Who knew? Anyway it doesn't matter now."

"No, I guess it doesn't."

Justin's lips found Brian's in a much deeper and more demanding kiss than the first one they had shared.

"I want you," Justin whispered.

"Not half as much as I want you. Can you stay?"

"Just try to get rid of me," Justin grinned.

"Then I think we should lock the door and retire to the bedroom," Brian suggested.

"That sounds like a plan. Shit!"

"What?"

"I think I left my apartment wide open when I ran up here."

"Then you better go lock up."

"Yeah," Justin agreed reluctantly standing up.

"You will come back?"

"Of course I will. Just let anybody or anything try to stop me."

"I'll be waiting in the bedroom," Brian said wanting to get into bed before Justin had to witness his struggle with the chair and his clothes.

"I don't want you to think I'll be put off by anything you have to do," Justin said truthfully sensing Brian's apprehension.

"Lock my door when you come in," Brian said with his crooked grin.

Justin grinned back before he made his way down the stairs. Brian went up to the bedroom. He got rid of his clothes and levered himself onto the bed. He spread the sheet across his useless legs and smoothed it out on Justin's side of the bed. He liked the sound of that - Justin's side.

He leaned back on the pillows and shook his head. How could this all have come about? It was almost beyond coincidence, almost like fate, destiny. The blond on the internet that he had so enjoyed joking with and sharing barbs with and baring his soul to was his blond, his Justin.

He heard the loft door sliding on its track. Justin was back. He hadn't let him down. He couldn't stop the smile from spreading across his face.

"Hey," Justin said coming up the steps on the opposite side from the ramp. That would take him to his side of the bed. How had he known? Brian didn't care. He just knew that something profound had happened to him and to his life since his first glimpses of a blond head and his first words with BB. "Waiting for something?" Justin grinned.

"Thought something interesting might pass this way if I waited long enough."

"I'd say your wait is over."

"So would I," Brian groaned as Justin removed his shirt.

"See something you like?" Justin teased.

"Maybe," Brian admitted watching the clothes slowly disappearing from Justin's beautiful body. He was so perfect like Brian had been at one time. Brian blinked back an almost tear. The action was not lost on Justin.

"What?" he asked. Brian shook his head. "Tell me, please," Justin asked as he slid off his underwear and crawled under the sheet next to Brian.

"I was just wishing that I could be as perfect as you."

"You are."

Brian snorted. "How do you say that with a straight face?" he demanded.

"There's not much straight about me," Justin giggled. "Lucky for you." He slid closer to Brian running his hand down Brian's chest to his happy trail. He could feel the muscles ripple under his fingers. He could see the sheet start to tent as Brian's cock responded.

"Very lucky for me," Brian moaned pulling Justin on top of him and capturing his lips in a demanding kiss.

Justin began moving his hips making them both gasp as the delicious friction had the desired effect. Justin's lips chewed at Brian's. He wanted this man like he had never wanted anything before. Brian pushed him up breaking the kiss.

"Roll over," he commanded.

Justin looked questioningly at him. He didn't think Brian could get up onto his knees to fuck him from behind.

"Just do it," Brian stated firmly. Justin rolled over.

He felt Brian shifting around, felt the sheet disappear from around his lower body. He felt Brian's hands grasp his hips and spread the cheeks of his ass. Then nothing.

He wondered if Brian had suddenly realized that this wasn't going to work. "Brian?" he said.

"You do have the most glorious bubble butt," Brian stated continuing to study the perfect globes he held in his hands.

Justin giggled. "That's the other meaning of BB," he said.

"No!" Brian reacted. "Didn't I call you that the other day?"

"Yeah, I almost made the connection at that moment, but others have called me bubble butt, so I thought it was just coincidence."

"I wish I was the first," Brian said thoughtfully.

"You can be my first everything else," Justin said smiling over his shoulder at Brian.

Brian grinned back. That statement held such promise of the future. For the first time in a very long time he thought maybe he did have a future, a future with this wonderful young man.

"Are you just going to stare at my ass?" Justin asked looking back at Brian. "It is good for other things."

"I know," Brian groaned.

His tongue licked down the length of Justin's crack. Justin felt the cool saliva Brian's tongue deposited in its wake. He moaned into the pillow below him. He felt Brian's tongue return to his hole licking all around it and, oh God, sucking on it, hard. Justin moaned louder. Brian's tongue probed into the pucker gradually forcing the muscles to allow him entrance. His tongue breached the first ring. Justin's head came up and he moaned again. Brian stiffened his tongue and probed deeper. Justin began to gasp and writhe beneath him. He bucked back wanting the tongue to go farther.

When Brian felt Justin was sufficiently ready he reached over to the nightstand and handed him a condom. Justin rolled over as Brian turned onto his back. Justin straddled him and smiled down as he ripped open the foil packet. He sheathed Brian's dripping cock.

Justin stared down into the hazel eyes that looked unwaveringly back at him. He felt Brian position his cock under him and he began to lower himself onto it. He closed his eyes as the head entered, expelling a breath at the twinge of pain. He opened his eyes after the pain subsided. Brian studied him intently. He slid down onto the rigid shaft until he was fully impaled. Justin had fucked and been fucked by men before, but nothing had ever felt like this. He knew it was more than just a fuck. He hoped Brian knew that too.

Justin sat astride Brian's hips, waiting. He wanted something more from Brian. He felt Brian's hands slide under his ass and push him up. It didn't look like he was going to get what he wanted just yet, but there was time. He'd give Brian the fuck of his life. He'd make him love him later.

Raising up and sitting down hard, Justin heard the air being expelled from Brian's lungs. He leaned in and kissed Brian his tongue sweeping all around the inside of Brian's mouth. He loved the taste of this man, his mouth, his skin, his cock, his spunk. Maybe later he could taste Brian's ass too. As he began his up and down movements he wondered if taste had a lot to do with physical attraction. He could honestly say that he had never tasted another man who tasted as sweet as Brian. Maybe that was a big part of why they were destined to be together. And they were destined for that. Justin knew it deep inside him.

He rode Brian's cock with wild abandon. It fit perfectly inside him despite its size. They were perfect for each other. Justin bounced in utter ecstasy as he felt Brian's hand around his cock jacking him off. He threw his head back gasping for air and moaning uncontrollably.

"Now!" he yelled and came with blinding force.

Brian called Justin's name as the man's anal muscles tried to cut his dick in half. He shot into the condom again and again and again. When he regained his senses Justin lay on his chest, his face buried in Brian's hair. Brian could feel his cock still up the warm, velvet channel of Justin's ass.

Before he thought about it his arm came around Justin's back making sure they stayed together. He reached for the sheet with his other hand. Pulling it up over them he allowed himself to drift off with the new and profound thought that he had everything he'd ever wanted safe in his arms.

Brian awoke hours later to sun streaming through the gap he had left in the curtains. He was alone. Justin had left. He sat up hoping Justin was somewhere else in the loft. All was silence. He wasn't in the bathroom or the kitchen unless he had stopped breathing. Brian threw back the sheet. What had happened this time? Why had Justin left?

He thought back to their coupling in the early morning hours. He had never felt the things he had experienced with Justin with anyone else. When he had the use of his legs he never wanted to feel those emotions about another man. He never wanted to depend on anyone else or have them depend on him. He wanted to be free. He wanted to fuck. He didn't want to need someone else.

And then there was Justin. He wanted him and needed him, wanted to be able to depend on him. He never wanted to let him down. He wanted to fuck the blond, but he also wanted to make love to Justin. He wondered if he would ever be able to tell him that.

And where was he? Why had he disappeared again? Brian didn't think he could stand going days without seeing him again. He sighed. Maybe he would come back. If he didn't Brian decided he would go to Justin's apartment and claim him back. He never ran after anybody, but this one was worth it.

Brian hauled himself into his chair and decided he needed a shower. When he emerged a while later he could swear he smelled coffee. He wheeled down the ramp to find the table set, bagels and cream cheese laid out and Justin smiling at him.

"Perfect timing," Justin said. "The coffee just finished running through."

"Smells great," Brian said. "Where did you go?"

"I woke up about an hour ago. I was going to make us breakfast, but peanut butter and poppers didn't seem to cut it. So I went out and picked us up some bagels and started the coffee when I got back. I heard you in the shower."

"Come here," Brian said. Justin slid onto Brian's lap smiling at the knowledge that Brian wanted to give him a good morning kiss.

The kiss was gentle and sweet. Brian tried to convey some of the newfound feelings that he was beginning to experience. Justin finally broke the kiss.

"You need to eat," he said with a grin. "Have to keep your strength up."

Brian snorted but allowed Justin to stand up. Justin went to the kitchen to get the coffee pot. Brian settled his chair at the table picking up a bagel. It was still warm. Suddenly he was ravenous.

"Justin," he said watching the young man fill two mugs with coffee. "I think there's a jar of grape jelly in that cupboard next to the fridge." Justin looked and triumphantly held up a jar of Smuckers.

"Yum, my favorite," he said bringing it and the coffee to the table.

They munched on their bagels in silence watching each other, sizing up how their habits fit together, taking note of reactions to each thing the other did.

When they were pretty well finished with the bagels Justin got up and poured them each a refill of coffee.

"That was a nice treat," Brian said with a grin wiping his mouth.

"Glad you liked it," Justin replied returning the coffee pot to the maker and turning the machine off. "I … I brought something up from my apartment when I was out. This is what I was going to give you when we had coffee this morning." He waited for Brian's reaction.

"Coffee hasn't worked out so well for us," Brian said. Justin smiled a little at the "us". He liked the sound of that. "Maybe we should stick to breakfast."

"Everyday?"

"Sounds good to me."

Justin's best smile lit up the loft. Brian felt his gut flip. He wanted to always see that smile in the morning.

"So what is this thing you want to give me?" Brian asked. Things were getting decidedly too emotional. He needed to get back to more practical things.

Justin bent down behind the counter. He stood up and walked towards Brian. He was carrying a frame. Brian groaned inwardly. Justin must be giving him a piece of his artwork. He hoped he liked what the man did. He wasn't sure what he could say if he thought Justin's art stunk.

Justin turned the frame around and rested it on the table in front of Brian. Brian felt his heart swell and tears appear in the corners of his eyes.

"My God," was all he could get out.

In front of him was a sketch of the moment when Gus had touched his nose in the hospital room. Justin had captured the essence of him and his son in the portraits, but he had also captured the raw emotion of that moment. Brian didn't think he had ever seen himself look so vulnerable and so … happy. He thought he had covered up the emotions that ran through him at that moment, but Justin had seen them. And then he had captured them in this beautiful drawing.

"Do you like it?" Justin asked getting worried by Brian's continued silence.

"It's perfect," Brian breathed. "How … how did you know?"

"That you felt such love for your son?" Justin asked. Brian nodded. "I told you I'm an artist. I'm very observant. But it was written so plainly on your face at that moment."

"Did you draw it from memory?" Brian asked fascinated at how Justin had been able to capture this.

"I'm good, but not that good," Justin said with a grin. "Remember when you asked everybody to leave the room at the hospital?" Brian nodded. "One of the lesbians had taken a picture at that moment when Gus touched you. I asked her for a copy of it. I got it the next day. That's part of the reason I didn't come to see you. I was drawing and then I had to get it framed."

"It's great, Justin. Thank you."

"I'm just happy you like it. We could find a good spot to hang it," Justin suggested.

"In a minute. I just want to look at it."

Justin smiled and began clearing the table while Brian stared at the drawing. He was so pleased that Brian really seemed to appreciate his work and the effort he had made to get it done so quickly. Now all he had to do was make sure that Brian came to his art show. He hoped the plan he and Lindsay had put in motion would work. The last thing he wanted to do now was piss Brian off.