CHAPTER 37 - COOKIES AND THE TIGER UNDERNEATH THAT MOUSE

MEL

“Well what are you waiting for?” They both look at me bemused. “Go and get your children!” I hiss, keeping my voice as low as I can as I am so fucking angry!

They go upstairs as if in a trance. After 20 minutes, they are still up there. I go and see what they are doing. I hear them in the bathroom, sighing, I open the door.

“What are you doing now?” I ask.

“Going to give them a bath, is that a problem?” Lindsay asks tightly as Michael tests the water.

I check the corridor and then close the door. “Apart from the fact that during dinner I said I would be bathing them when I got home? Which is because we wanted Gus to have as much time downstairs as possible, no not a problem at all!”

I pull the plug out of the bath, splashing Michael in the process. “Careful Mel!” He gripes as he moves back like a scalded cat.

“And you were going to put the kids in such hot water?” I remark sarcastically. “Now go and take them downstairs. And stop wasting any more of Gus’s time!”

GUS

Daddy and papa are looking guilty. “Daddy, papa have you been eating cookies?”

“It was an emergency Gussie.” Papa smiles and I go over to them and wait.

“You know what to do.” I am trying to look serious but daddy is starting to smile. “Daddy, stop smiling. I’m supposed to be disi...discli...telling you off!”

Daddy clears his throat and nods. “Which hand?”

“The left one please.” I tell him and he puts it out and I give him a smack. “Naughty daddy!”

“Sorry Sonny Boy.”

“Papa, your left hand please.”

“Do I hafta…?” He asks in a baby voice.

“Yes you hafta...hand please.” He puts it out and I give him a smack too. “Naughty papa!”

“Sorry Sonny Boy.” Papa replies in his normal voice.

“Good. Now Auntie Emmy time to judge. How do we do that? I want to do it properly.”

“Okay Gussie, first grandma and grandpa need to put the cookies on plates and then we go and judge. And first we look at them to see if they are pleasing to the eye…”

“What does that mean?” I ask.

“Pleasing to the eye means that you like the way it looks.” Daddy tells me. “Like papa is very pleasing to my…ouch papa, I was going to say eye!”

“Just making sure.”

“You two are so silly.” I giggle and poke my tongue back out at daddy. “Then what happens, Auntie Emmy?”

“We then take a cookie from each plate and we taste it.”

“One each?” I ask hopefully.

“No sweetie. One between us and, of course, Gummy.”

“Oh yes, Gummy has to help!”

“Okay we’re ready!” Grandpa calls out and we go into the kitchen.

The cookies look really good and after Auntie Emmy puts Gummy to stand on the chair, we start. Gummy spat out a couple but I knew which ones I loved!

“So are we all agreed, Gussie and Gummy?”

“Yes Auntie Emmy. Shall we tell them now? And what do we do with the um…”

“Horrible ones?”

“Yes.”

“Leave that with me. Not to worry sweetie, your Auntie Emmy will deliver the news.” He gives me his Auntie Emmy smile. “Now you take one each of the winning cookies on a plate. Are you sure you remember, which is which?”

I nod and carefully put them on the plate and head back to the lounge. “Okay, we have the winners!” I call out and everyone stops talking. “In 3rd place is the chocolate chip and blueberry cookie, who was that?”

“That was mine.” Hunner tells me.

“Told you, didn’t I? Gummy finished that by herself. She loves your food Hunner!” He smiles at me and lets me put on the badge that Auntie Emmy made for me.

“Seriously, have you considered minoring in Culinary Arts?” Grandma asks. “You are a superb cook.”

“I’ve been telling him this for a while…” Uncle Ben says.

“What does that mean?” I ask frowning.

“When you’re older Sonny Boy and you go to big school, you take a course in something that you really want to do…” Daddy leans forward and takes Hunner’s cookie with a smile. “And then you take another course you want to do but not as much as the first thing you picked. So major would be the first course and minor would be the second course.”

“Oh then you should do the culi thing first because you are really good Hunner. No daddy, they have to see the cookie before you eat it!” I take the second place cookie away from him. “Second place is the mousie one, who did that?”

“Mousie?” Mommy asks. “Are you sure that’s right, Lambskin?”

“Muesli, he means muesli.” Auntie Emmy laughs. I knew he would get that word wrong.

“That would be me.” Uncle Teddy puts up his hand. “They’re Uncle Blake’s favourites.”

“They are yummy but a little too hard for Gummy but she sucked them really nicely. Here is your badge.”

“Thank you Gus. Little tip... these ones work really great as ice cream sandwiches.”

“They do?! Momma, we have another cookie to use! Can you sended momma the way you made it?”

“It will be my pleasure.” He smiles at me.

“Now first place, Gussie.” Auntie Emmy has a special thing for that.

“This one is white chocolate, marsh...marsh allows and the red fruit.”

“I think they are raspberries honey.” Momma is looking at the cookie.

“Oh it was so nice! So can I give it to daddy now?”

Everyone goes quiet.

“What do you mean give it to daddy?” Papa asks.

“Daddy always sends me a box to school. I knew it was his but he’s never put the red fruit in it before. They’re my very favourites! You’re next papa but I just love these! I have them with milk every day during my morning break.” Auntie Emmy looks like he’s going to cry as does papa.

“Can you give me a minute with daddy please, Gussie?”

“Okay papa.” I watch them go to the back garden and turn to grandma. “Is everything OK?”

“Oh honey…” Grandma smiles. “You have no idea how OK everything is.”

BACK GARDEN

JUSTIN

“Look at me.” I order him quietly and slowly he does. “So you make a batch of cookies every week and send them to Gus? Where do you make them?”

“Kitchen at Kinnetic when everyone has gone.” He rolls his lips in and he looks so adorably embarrassed that I have to wrap myself around him. He lets out the breath I know he’s been holding since Gus outed him.

“Come on he wants to give his daddy the prize for best cookie and I will give you the prize for best cookie maker when we get home.”

“Excellent.” He purrs in my ear.

EMS

Well I’ll be damned Brian Stud of Liberty Avenue [retired] Taylor-Kinney is a lil Suzy Homemaker!

“Gussie! They’re back now!” I call upstairs and he carefully comes down the stairs, holding the bag. He didn’t want anyone looking before his daddy saw it.

While they were outside, Debs made it very clear that any teasing of Brian doing such a sweet thing for Gus would not be tolerated. But she has such a proud and sappy look on her face that we’ve been teasing her instead!

“Daddy, you need to come down.” Gus announces. Brian kneels down in front of him and Gus puts the Number 1 medal round his neck. “Well done for being the bestest cookie maker, the bestest daddy and the bestest at making papa happy in the world!”

It’s when Gus flings his arms around Brian’s neck and the Big Bad closes his eyes, savoring the moment that I have to leave. The scene is just too sweet to remain unaffected and all I want to do is cry and pummel the Wonder Twits, by turns. I feel a strong pair of arms pulling me back into his chest and he sniffs.

“Using them as bargaining chips, makes me wish I left the water fucking cold!” Lucas growls and I like him just a little bit more! “So the rest of the cookies what happens to them?” He asks.

“Carl is going to be sharing them out, although I would recommend you don’t have the peanut butter ones. They were hideous!”

“I’m allergic to nuts.” He replies relieved.

“Not all nuts.” I smirk before pouncing on his succulent mouth.

CARNEGIE MELLON - MONDAY, LUNCHTIME, TWO WEEKS LATER

STAFF ROOM

VIRGINIA

I am whole heartedly sick of her pissy mood! I don’t know what is going on in her fucking life that is so fucking bad, and I don’t give enough of a damn to find out. But if she snipes at me one more time, I shall fucking lose it!

I slam the papers down and am surprised to hear Bernhard snicker. “What’s she done this time?”

“Changed this afternoon’s plan at the last minute again!” He leans back in his seat. “Do you think I should speak to Millicent?”

He regards me carefully. “You are not the only one that has been on the receiving end of her certain brand of charm. Have you tried to speak to Lindsay about it?”

“You are the teaching assistant, so assist!” I tell him. “But I feel that I am doing part of her job as well while she’s trying to work whatever the fuck out of her system!”

“Well who knew there was that little tiger under all that mouse?!” Bernhard laughs.

“Oh that’s nothing, you should hear her in the bathroom. We have taken to steering clear of it for a good ten minutes after she’s finished the class so she can calm down!”

I whirl round to find Cassia and Nadine behind me and I go crimson. “Am I that bad?!”

“You MFC, I just....I am doing everything and you sit there! Just get laid already!” Nadine smiles. “Ringing any bells?”

“MFC?” Bernhard asks.

“Motherfucking cunt.” Harold, who does statistical reasoning, explains before closing the door. “Seriously, what is wrong with her? She’s been stomping around glowering for the last... two weeks?” We shrug. “Well between us it seems a certain someone doing what she aspired to do but has no talent for has not invited her to where she most wants to be.”

“What do you mean?” Cassia and I ask at the same time. This is not good.

“She was bitching to Malia, she does French, that Justin has yet to invite her to the Rathman Show next week. After all, she discovered him when he was a mere pup!”

“For the love of God, if I hear her say that one more time...oh!” Malia comes to a surprised halt as she sees us all. “I uh…”

“Welcome to the Lindsay Peterson Disparagement Society.” Harold chortles.

KINNETIC

BRIAN’S EN SUITE

CYNTHIA

“Promise me you won’t move from there! Promise!” He just nods and I take my shoes off and run!

“Find Ted! I don’t care where he is, get him out!” I shout at our receptionist as I head to my office, of all the days to leave my phone at my desk! Quickly, I dial him. “Justin get here now!” The next call I put in is to Ruth but I don’t even get to speak before she says she’s on her way.

I run back to Brian’s office just in time to see Ted sprinting in. “When did they call?!” He looks as scared as me.

“I don’t know. I went in for something else and found him in there just staring at the wall! Justin was at Bloom, so he won’t be long! Ted…”

“No Cyn, not thinking about it!”

Brian, is as promised, still sitting there in the shower with his phone dangling from his fingers just staring.

“Hey Bri, Justin won’t be long.” Ted sits next to him and takes the phone out of his hand. “And Ruth is coming too. She’s going to take you both home after this, no arguing.” Nothing, not even a sneer. “Never heard you so quiet. If you don’t say something, I’m going to ask for a raise and take your silence as a yes…”

“Brian!” Justin shouts as he bangs into the office.

“In here!” I yell. “Don’t run!”

Justin comes flying in and Ted just about moves out of the way as he flings himself into Brian’s arms. “Tell me, just tell me!”

“He doesn’t have it. Sonny Boy is fine. He doesn’t have it.”

“Oh, thank God.” Ted mutters and then clears his throat. “Cyn, you and I will cover the meetings for the rest of the day and tomorrow.”

“Thank you, Teddy.” Brian whispers.

TED

When I shut the door to my office, I sink down to the floor and cry. Not only because Gus is fine, but because he called me Teddy!

CARNEGIE MELLON STAFF ROOM - TUESDAY LUNCHTIME

VIRGINIA

Okay, I can partly understand because she was worried about her son. But she’s also still bitching about Justin not inviting her to Rathman.

“Why in fuck’s name should she be invited since she’s not actively been in his career after he was weaned from her breast?! Not that there are much of those either. If talent was measured by them, she’s sorely lacking!” Harold rolls his eyes.

“You are terrible!” Malia snorts then looks dreamy. “Oh my goodness, did you see that outline last week?”

“No, what outline?” I ask. There is a pause when the door opens and it’s Millicent. We all heave a sigh of relief.

“Carry on Malia!” Harold orders. “What? I appreciate beautiful things and you have to admit he is beautiful.”

“I was trying not to look but it was an outline of...well...um...him from the waist down, side on and he’s um, with Justin and um...”

“Oh dear God, are you serious?!” I squeal. “Do you think he will have that in Rathman?”

“Wait! Excuse me! What is he doing?!” Bernhard looks befuddled.

“Oh that one!” Cassia smiles. “He’s feeding Justin his cock.” She replies bluntly just as Lindsay comes in.

“Now that’s an interesting conversation!” She trills. “Who is feeding who whose cock?”

We all look around at each other.

“Brian to Justin.” Cassia replies and starts her marking again.

“As a mentor Cassia, I don’t think that is an appropriate comment on an artist’s work. I am pretty sure that Justin wouldn’t like you to…”

“ARE YOU FUCKING WITH US RIGHT NOW?!” I explode and everyone jumps.

“Virginia, how dare you speak to me like that?! You seem to forget that you are still on your probationary period…”

“And you seem to forget that you are not, I repeat a million times, not Justin’s fucking manager! And it is his talent that he gets to decide what he does with it! You have gone around telling everyone and I mean every fucking one that you discovered him! You nurtured his talent! You got him the Rathman Show, but what you conveniently forget with the last one was that he didn’t want to fucking go. You lied to them! And it has cost you your gallery aspirations because nobody, no fucking body will be represented by you, you backstabbing...”

“Virginia, you are on thin ice!” Lindsay shouts.

“And you need to put the fucking crack pipe down! And once the delusional drugs are out of your system go and get that NPD of yours check by a medically trained physician and not the street pharma doc you have to have been using!”

“Virginia! I am going to have Millicent write…”

“Write what? That I called you out on your pretentious bullshit. Cassia told me not to say anything about Rathman but amazingly enough several staff members seems to know about it. So where did it come from? Malia, Harold, Bernhard...can one of you tell me who told you about Rathman?”

“Lindsay.” Malia responds.

“Now I have been reading up on Rathman and one of the conditions of the show is that it is not discussed to another 3rd Party. So what do you say to that Miss Loose Lips?! Your flippy-flappy gums could potentially have cost him the showing!”

“Virginia! That is enough!” Millicent silences me and Lindsay looks smug.

“No, it isn’t. I fucking quit! I refuse to work for someone who thinks the world owes her a…”

“I refuse to accept that!” Millicent barks. “I will move you to a much more deserving person. Lindsay, you will continue your classes on your own with mentoring from myself. This will be after a two day suspension without pay for what you have been saying about Justin. Sabotage simply to stroke your over-inflated, wrong opinion of yourself, will not be tolerated. Live vicariously through Justin within your own mind because that is all it will ever be! You may have discovered him when he was just a teen but those days are long past. He’s a grown man now, able to fly without your supposed assistance. Besides what exactly have you done with your talent, or lack thereof, that would warrant him taking your advice to be so crucial for his budding career? And riding his coattail while basking in his glory doesn’t count! While other professors here, especially Cassia, have had at least one showing in their chosen mediums, you have done what? He owes you nothing! And the sooner you get that through your head, the happier you, and the rest of us, will be. But none of that gives you the right to be a miserable harpy to the faculty and students of this university! During your two days enforced vacation, I would suggest you not only work on your attitude but try learning some humility. Just a short time ago, you were jobless, hire-less and hopeless. If you’re not careful, you will be again. You are lucky we are so desperate for teachers that we will keep anyone. But be advised, short-staffed or not, I will not tolerate any further antics from you. When you come back, there better be a noteworthy change in how you present yourself to this establishment or else...”