JUSTIN

I watched as they installed my painting in the building. I was getting a reputation, but it wasn't overnight. My agent told me a new business was looking at my work and wanted something for their office. It felt good that they overlooked other, more famous artists and liked my work. I could laugh again, thinking of my father cursing up a storm that I wasn’t going to live on the streets, the way he believes I should. I left when the last painting was hung and went to the park for my favorite Sabrett hot dogs. I patted my stomach to let my child know Daddy was hurrying.

My friends tried to talk me out of having a baby, but I wanted someone who was mine. They couldn't understand wanting to have a baby when I was still single and young. They also still had families, which I didn't, since the day my mom and sister died in a car accident. Craig blames me for them leaving him, because Mom was coming to me. Late at night, when I miss her and Molly, I could almost believe him. When he tried to sue me for their life insurance, he brought up that it was my fault they were on the road that night. He seems to forget that he was the one who kicked my mother out when she wouldn’t ignore me. She’d been living on her own with Molly for three years before the accident. He couldn’t seem to get it through his head that they were divorced. He made it sound like I coerced my mother into changing the beneficiary of the policies she bought for herself, Molly, and me. My lawyer pointed out that the policies came after the divorce, and since he took my Mom off his, why would she want him on hers. The case never got past mediation, because the mediator explained to Craig that he really didn’t have any reason to expect money from his ex wife. I couldn’t figure out why he was fighting so hard, it wasn’t like it was massive amounts of money. It paid for the funerals and left me not having to work three jobs. I know it was that he was trying to get all the property my mother had and thought this was the way to keep my ‘disgusting lifestyle’ from embarrassing the family.

I sold everything but the keepsakes that were special to my mom and sister. My mom told me the day my father kicked her and Molly out that he was no longer family in her eyes. We all went on with our lives, leaving Craig to the life he seemed to want, one without us. Mom did well in real estate and was doing better than Craig’s failing business. How he thinks he can sell the same shit the bigger chains were selling cheaper is anyone’s guess.

I left home when he threatened to send me to military school so that his buddies could beat the gay out of me. It wasn’t easy at first, and there were times when I looked at the hustlers on the streets of New York, wondering if I should give up the jobs that barely paid my rent and do what they were doing. It took seeing the dead look they got when a john showed up to change that thought in my head. I might have been tired as hell, but I was still alive and still managing to survive. My mom had wanted to help me, but I needed to be able to say I could do it on my own. I don’t think a cheeseburger will ever be my favorite again after the many I cooked for the masses.

I looked up and saw the shithead I once dated with his new boyfriend. You know, the guy Ethan’s probably cheating on, the way they cheated when he was with me. Darius was always running around Ethan, kissing his ass. Ethan treated Darius like shit when he would pop up everywhere we went. It wasn’t until I went to see Ethan unexpectedly one day, to tell him I was invited to show my work at a gallery, that I found out about them. I wish I could say I was devastated. I hate to admit it, but I really wasn’t. Ethan was already getting on my nerves by then. Everything had to revolve around him. He didn’t want to hear anything if it wasn’t worship of his talent. I still don’t know why I went to tell him, other than he was the guy I was seeing. I just hate the way they seemed to go on a hate campaign to everyone we had in common. The only friends I had left were the ones who didn’t like Ethan in the first place. Ethan tried to derail my career when I wouldn’t come back to him. He kept saying Darius paid attention to him when I was too busy playing at being a artist, and that I owed him for my career. I stuffed the roses he gave me as a bribe to forgive him in the garbage disposal and turned it on. Then packed up the shit I left at his place and walked away. He tried to make me sound like a deranged ex, begging him to leave the love of his life. After that, I decided no more relationships with assholes.

As I entered the park he spotted me and made sure to head straight toward me, with Darius on his arm. I’m starting to wonder how anyone doesn’t see that he’s the deranged ex, who seems to think if he keeps shitting on me, that I’ll somehow think he’s the man for me.

“Wow, you really let yourself go,” Darius says, staring at my stomach.

“He was never better than you, Darling,” Ethan tells him, kissing him.

“No, that would require me kissing your ass while you played at being a musician,” I tell him, smiling.

“My record deal says I do more than play,” He tells me.

“How are you dealing with the closet Ethan stuck you in?” I ask Darius.

“You will never understand how to support the man you love,” Darius tell me.

“Support is one thing, but watching the man you love dating women, well that was just more than I could do. I’m surprised he’s even touching you, in public, where anyone could see it. I wonder what the agent is going to think if somehow a picture of that kiss gets out to Ethan’s admiring fans, you know, the six that bought the CD,” I smirk, barely containing a laugh when Ethan dropped his hand from Darius.

“What are you doing talking to them? We’ve been waiting for you to get here,” A man asks me.

I sort of gawked, the guy was fucking gorgeous, even while scowling at Ethan.

“Who the hell is this?” Ethan asks, pissed when the guy puts his arm around me.

“Who the hell is he?” The guy asks me.

“No one worth telling you about,” I tell the guy who is now glued to me.

“Justin, I want to know who this guy is and why he’s touching you,” Ethan demands.

“I’m whatever Justin wants me to be, but right now we’re late for our day with my son,” He tells Ethan.

I stood there, confused at why the guy was standing there with me. My baby kicked at me saying ‘Daddy feed me’. The guy looked down and then ran his hand over where baby kicked him.

“I need to feed Justin and our baby, so bye now,” He tells Ethan.

“Strange that no one mentioned Justin was seeing anyone,” Ethan tells us.

“Why do you care about who the fucker sees? We’re together now,” Darius demands, glaring at Ethan.

“Shut up, this doesn’t concern you,” Ethan yells at him.

“I don’t concern you either,” I tell him.

“I want to know who this fucker is,” Ethan demands.

“Brian Kinney. Now, why not run after the love of your life. Justin doesn’t have time for you,” Brian tells him, shooing him off.

“Daddy,” A child comes running and crying, with two guys running after him.

“Gus, I’m right here,” Brian says, picking up the toddler.

“He noticed you disappeared,” The taller guy tells Brian.

“I didn’t disappear, just came to get Justin,” Brian tells Gus.

“Hi Jussin,” Gus says, reaching out to touch my hair.

Ethan huffed then stomped off after Darius, who was almost out of the park. I smiled at Gus when he pulled back after touching my hair.

“It’s pretty,” Gus tells Brian.

“Thank you, I think you're rather handsome yourself,” I tell Gus. “Thanks for coming over. For some reason Ethan can’t seem to understand I was finished with him when I caught him cheating,” I tell Brian, turning to go get the hot dog my kid seems to be kicking field goals for.

“You dated that asshole?” Brian asks me.

“I will forever say it was the tequila that made me think he was worth my time. I really need to get some food before the baby here gets any more demanding,” I tell him.

“We were having a picnic, I make the guys try my stuff before I use it in my business. Why not give me your opinion. These guys never want to hurt my feelings so they just say it’s fabulous. I’m Emmett, this is Ted, and that of course is our Gussy, and Brian,” Emmett introduces everyone while taking my arm and dragging me with him.

“Justin Taylor,” I tell them.

Emmett piled a plate high and I was too hungry to argue with him. I think the moaning told him I was definitely thumbs up on the fabulous. Gus sat next to me, watching me eat, and I looked up at the guys who were watching Gus moving himself onto my lap.

“Kids like me, my friend Daph says it’s because I look so innocent,” I joke.

“Baby?” Gus asks when he felt the movement.

“Yep, hopefully it will be soon. I never realized how long nine months really are. She’s due in a couple of weeks,” I tell him.

“Are you having it with your partner?” Brian asks.

“No partner. Obviously my taste in men leaves a lot to be desired,” I tell him, cringing when they all nod their heads yes.

My phone rang and I saw it was Ethan. I silence it and smile as Gus keeps running his hands over the movement.

“I can take him, if you want me too,” Brian offers.

“I don’t mind. Most of my friends think if they ignore it, that a baby won’t suddenly appear,” I tell him.

“Why would they do that?” Ted asks me.

“None of them understand me wanting to be tied down to a kid. They think I should be drinking my nights away and picking up guys to have fun with. They really aren’t friends, just the people I know,” I tell them.

“We moved away from those kind of people,” Ted tells me, looking around as if sad.

“How long have you been here?” I ask.

“A few months, we’ve all been helping Brian set up his Ad firm,” Emmett tells me.

“Feed your clients the food you fed me and you’ll win them over. Thanks for rescuing me,” I tell them, handing Gus back to his father so I can get up. “Son of a bi…” I yell, when my daughter seems to be kicking to get out.

“What? Are you okay?” Brian asks, holding Gus.

“I don’t think my daughter is going to wait as long as the doctor thinks,” I groan.

Emmett and Ted got on either side of me to help me up, but I just wanted to roll in a ball. Brian handed Gus to Emmett and picked me up, asking what hospital. I told him I didn’t care, but managed to give Emmett my doctor’s card between contractions.

I thought I’d be alone when my daughter was born, instead I had three guys and a toddler in the room. The doctor didn’t argue when I told him to shut up and get her out. He performed the C-section and presented my little girl to me and my three new friends. I started to worry when I couldn’t think of a name. I thought I still had more time.

“What names have you thought of?” Emmett asks.

“I haven’t really found one I like,” I tell him, staring at her face.

Gus crawled up onto the bed with me and touched her face. “Lily, cause they’re pretty, like her,” Gus tells me.

“You think so?” I ask him.

“I can show you,” Gus tells me.

“I’ve seen the lilies and you're right, they are pretty like my Lily,” I tell him.

When it got late, Ted and Emmett decided to leave, but Gus seemed to think he needed to stay with his Lily. I didn’t mind, it was nice to have company when I expected to be alone. Gus fell asleep in the other bed while Brian was in the corner with a laptop that Emmett brought to him.

“Why are you still here?” I whisper, watching him.

“My son talked to you,” He tells me, closing his laptop.

“Why did you help me in the park?” I ask, when he didn’t say anything else.

“I could see you weren’t happy when they went out of their way to approach you. I don’t like assholes,” He tells me.

“It was sweet of you to care,” I tell him, yawning.

“First time anyone called me that,” I heard before I fell asleep.

I woke up when I heard Lily making noise, but didn’t move when Brian picked her up and fed her. He whispered to her to let me sleep, and rocked her in the chair while feeding her. I fell asleep, trusting him, someone I didn’t even know, with my world in his arms.