JUSTIN

I left before Brian woke up, I needed to talk to my mother. It wasn’t like the nurses didn’t tell her everything that went on when she wasn’t around. I knew she blamed Brian for what happened, but like Ted and I both agree on, you blame the person who did the crap, not the guy who had no idea that the school let a lunatic around people. I stopped to grab some stuff from a bakery, because Mom and I were going to have a conversation that comfort food helps. I saw Emmett standing in line but didn’t make any attempt to talk to him. I’m sure he’s heard the twink was back and sat around comforting Michael all night. I didn’t need Emmett to think he had to defend Michael to me. I tried not to look at him, but Emmett stopped right in front of me.

“Can we talk?” He asks.

“I was on my way to talk to my mother, maybe later.” I tell him, going to put in an order.

“I just spent the night having Michael waking up Deb’s whole house and really need a conversation that doesn’t sound like you're everything that’s wrong in Michael’s world. I know we weren’t extremely close, but I did miss the spot of color you brought in my world.” He tells me.

“Let me get some coffee, my mom has no idea I was coming anyway.” I tell him, giving in when he practically begged me to stay.

I sat down, and for a minute neither of us seemed to have anything to say to the other.

“I’m trying to figure out why my mom didn’t tell me something. I get she was upset at the time and couldn’t see anything but that I was hurt, but it was something that might have changed how I saw something at the time.” I tell him, to end the silence.

“Maybe she thought it wouldn’t help you to know.” He tells me.

“I guess, but a lot of that time was confusing for me. I was having anger issues and ready to give up. If she had told me Brian had been there every night, maybe I wouldn’t have felt the way I did before I left. Then again, I worked harder because I wanted to see Brian, so maybe they were both right to keep it from me.” I tell him.

“You’re talking about the bashing?” He asks.

“More about what happened at the hospital, but that time period.” I tell him.

“I’m such an asshole. There I was spouting to Michael and Ted that Brian was too busy to deal with a defective toy… Oh God, please understand, I didn’t see you that way, it was just Michael was questioning why Brian kept disappearing and no one knew why or where he went. So as usual I answered, not really thinking how that sounded. I want you to know, I didn’t visit because in a way I felt like we all sort of made you go to that prom.” He tells me, looking miserable.

“Why? I decided to go. All you did was dress me up when I asked. As for what you said, it wasn’t like we were really friends, all you saw was the guy Brian hung out with. Which, with his past, meant there wasn’t any reason to see that I’d be around in the future.” I tell him.

“Ted said you know what Michael said, and that we all just let it go.” He tells me.

“And what are you waiting for me to say? That I hated you for it. Sorry, but you have a right to do what you think is right for your life. When you think about it, the only person who he really said anything about was me, not you. So there’s nothing for you to forgive him for, it just shows that nothing Michael did, like trying say he and I were friends, was how Michael really felt about me. Michael and I couldn’t be friends. I got something from Brian that Michael was still left waiting for.” I tell him.

“Ben must have just gotten tired of waiting for the ‘Brian and Mikey show’ to end. Because after Michael said that, he walked. He doesn’t even talk to any of us if he see us.” He tells me.

“Like me, we only knew all of you through our relationships. Ben probably saw the way you were all talking to Michael and telling him that Ben was the worst candidate for relationship that anyone could have. Which probably caused Michael want to break it off, it wouldn’t have had him wanting to be around people who only saw the disease, and not a man who was really better than Michael should have gotten. Sorry I shouldn’t have said that, I’m sure there is something you all see about Michael that I never did.” I tell him.

“He has good points too, not that you would have ever seen them. He gave me a place to stay when I didn’t know where I’d be.” He tells me.

“Then you have every right to defend Michael, because he does treat you well. It’s not something I can say, and I won’t pretend he wanted anything but for me to disappear from Brian’s life. Which I did, and will again if coming back causes all of you to have to pick sides. I came back because I needed to see that Brian was happy, it’s something I wouldn’t let Ted tell me. I also wanted to see everyone.” I tell him.

“Deb knows you're here.” He warns me.

“I figured he couldn’t wait to start rallying the troops, but then he never manages to do anything original.” I tell him, leaving when they call me for my order.

I was out the door when Emmett ran out. “Can we go out some time while you're here?” He asks.

“I was planning on seeing the club, so if you're there, I’ll save you a dance.” I tell him.

BRIAN

I woke up when I fell off the couch, Ted was sitting at his kitchen table on his computer and got up, brought me coffee and wheat toast. Then sat back down, typing away.

“Thanks. You’re going to make a great housewife one day.” I tell him, sarcastically.

“Hopefully, but until then enjoy the rewards of a future housewife in training.” He laughs.

“How did I end up here?” I ask.

“After making me worry that you might have run Babylon dry of alcohol, I couldn’t tell you.” He tells me.

I sniff at myself and decided that Ted wasn’t too far from the truth. I was pissed that Justin didn’t seem to want to believe that he gave me things that Michael didn’t. So I used drinking and everything else that worked when Justin tended to make me want to care, not really sure why I showed up here. I sniffed and then picked up the pillow and sniffed it.

“So the twat was here?” I ask.

“Daphne’s away at college, she transferred when it came time to go to med school. Justin didn’t see any reason to stay with his mom when I told him he could use my extra room. He knows he’s always welcome in my house.” Ted tells me.

“I need a shower, I stink.” I tell him, ignoring the itch to kick his ass for… Justin picking his place over mine.

“Justin seemed to think he needed a shower after laying there with you.” He tells me.

“Where did he go, or are you going to keep me guessing?” I ask.

“He went to find out why his mother didn’t tell him you were at the hospital every night.” Ted tells me.

Can you say fuck over and over. It’s a reason I never drank this heavily, because the filter from my brain to my mouth tends to lessen, the drunker I get. Justin didn’t need a reason to be pissed at Jen, she did what she thought was best for her son. Really if Justin was paying attention to the Dr Dick episode, he knows that I never say no to women I respect, which caused the whole birthday fiasco for Michael. What Jen asked only hurt me, and I could live with that for Justin’s sake.

“He isn’t angry, just wondering why she never brought it up. Jen just didn’t feel the need when you and Justin were no longer together.” Ted tells me.

“So you're on Mother Taylor’s friend list too?” I snark.

“We talk and have lunch together when we run into each other. Justin asked her to make sure I kept my head on straight. You know Jen, anything her kids want, she does.” He tells me.

I refrained from saying I didn’t know her the way Ted seems to. “We can head to the diner after I take a shower.” I tell him.

“I have things to do before I go to Kinnetik, so I’ll just see you at work.” He tells me.

“Why don’t you want to go to the diner?” I ask.

“Are you kidding? After Michael found out about Justin being here, I’ll be public enemy number one for daring to defend Justin. Deb will be crawling all over my ass about why I didn’t tell her I knew where Sunshine’s been all this time. I’ll let Justin deal with Deb.” He tells me.

“Throwing him to the slaughter, what kind of friend does that?” I joke, even though it pissed me off a little that Ted would do that.

“He doesn’t need me to fight for him. He’s always been good at fighting for what he wants.” He tells me.

“How do you get that, when he ran from everything?” I sneered.

“Knowing the battle wasn’t going to win anything for anyone is not the same as running away. He was surprised that Emmett and I got together, but said if it was you and Michael it wouldn’t have surprised him. I even had to agree with him, because you told Michael everything, and Justin only found out when Michael opened his mouth, barely getting you to blink when Michael said things you didn’t want people to know. Sorry, but the whole not saying you love Justin, but having to make him hear you tell Michael, really was more than anyone would have stuck around for. Justin came here because he thinks that there is some reason you haven’t finally given Michael what he wants. I think, and it’s only me who thinks this, he needs you to finally give him a reason to move on from you. It’s in your court, all you have to do is give Michael what he’s wanted since he was fourteen and Justin will walk for good this time.” He tells me.

“What makes him think I ever wanted Michael as more than a friend? If I wanted that, Justin would have stayed a memory, not a constant in my life.” I tell him.

“You and I discussed it, I told you to let Michael go, and you told me you would when I did. It didn’t sound like friendship was all you thought.” He tells me.

I didn’t answer, but went to take a shower. Ted threw the truth at me, in the way I did to him years ago. Did I think I loved Michael at one time? It was there, but any time Michael tried to act on it, I pulled away. It was like the unfinished hand job, nothing made me want to finish it when Michael and I could have. Michael didn’t have me wanting to break my rules for a life with him, but Justin… well he got through, like Deb said one time.