Sonny looked at the young man beside him, wiping away the last of the shaving cream from his youthful face. The boy didn't need to shave as often as he did, and Sonny snickered - just a little - at the sudden image of this man/boy with a long flowing blond beard.

"Took me a bit ta understand what drew ‘im to ya."

"Shit! Sonny... I need to put a bell on you guys." Justin picked up the face towel he had dropped in the basin of water, wringing out the excess water. "Give me some warning, will you?"

He could tell Justin wasn't really upset, merely startled. Brian had chosen this man well. He was a very gentle minded, accepting lad, beautiful inside and out. He truly cared for his Brother.

"Our apologies, Justin. We should'a warned ya, but I asked Brian to let me speak my piece." There was a perpetually serious look about Sonny. He was always on guard, though Justin could see a slight softening in the face lately.

"It's okay. I'm... just still getting used to all this. I mean... um... it's not like we didn't actually meet each other years ago. I just didn't know it, then. I live with all these men, but I don't... Christ, I... it's okay, Sonny, really." Justin's face turned red. He knew he was rambling and he honestly didn't know why. Sonny had most certainly seen him without a shirt before. Hell, they'd fucked. Of that, Justin was certain. He had to fucking get over being startled when the Brothers showed up so unexpectedly.

"Brian is happy, Justin. Ya need ta know that. Even with all he's remembered, all he's endured... Ya make ‘im happy. That makes us happy." Sonny lightly touched the still damp hair on the young man's head. "Ya belong to all of us, now, yanno." Justin squinted his eyes and looked sharply at the man next to him, concerned. Sonny gave a small growl. "Not that way, lad. Unless... well, we'd all have ta agree for that."

Justin shook his head, his face growing more scarlet by the moment. "God, Sonny... I'd not thought about that. About what you need... Jesus!... I..." The young man drew the towel tighter around his waist and backed away slightly.

"Justin! Don't... don't ever be afraid of us hurtin' ya. Trick ‘n Mac, they aren't interested in any of that for their own reasons... and I'd never hurt ya, lad.Never. And I'll never put ya in danger any other way, either." Sonny's voice had softened, his gentle brogue lilting out, soothing. He saw the faint smile and nod of the bright head. "Yer all my Brother needs. I won't endanger that for either of ya. Protectin' Brian is what we are, Justin, it's why we are... We wanted ta thank ya, for understandin', for helpin' us to live."

"How the hell could I not want you to live, Sonny? You are all part of him, you are him." Justin traced the chiseled jaw with his hand, his eyes searching out the differences in this man. "So much the same and so different... I love him, Sonny, and I want him happy. That's my reason to live."

"I'm glad you feel that way, Sunshine. I love you, too." Brian's face beamed down on Justin, the strong brogue gone. "He loves you, too, and I'm... working on dealing with that. But you can trust him, baby. We promise."

Justin buried his face in the strong muscles of Brian's chest. "I trust you, Bri, and Sonny. But... right now we need to hurry. We have a date with Kinnetik."

Brian rested his chin on the mass of soft, blond hair and closed his eyes. What in the hell did he ever do to deserve this man? His heart filled with the light laughter of Trick singing - You must have been Gandhi or Buddha, or someone like that...*

*******

One could actually hear the silence as the two men walked through the double doors of Kinnetik, Inc. It had been months since any of these employees had seen Brian Kinney, the man they owed their jobs and livelihoods to. They all stood, mouths agape, surprised into silence not only from their boss's mere presence in the lobby after all this time, but by the way he looked. Gone was the dapper, Armani clad, untouchable executive they knew and feared. Walking in front of them, hand in hand with the beautiful blond at his side, was a very laid back man. His hair was longer and unstyled, almost brushing the shoulders of his light leather jacket. The tailored slacks and tie had given way to a beautifully fitted pair of distressed jeans and logo tee-shirt. They had all heard the rumors of illness, death's door... but this man was hale and healthy and beautiful. And looking more relaxed than they could ever remember seeing him. And... fuck... he was smiling!

"Good day, Mr. Kinney. It's good to have you back."

"Hey, Dorothy, good to see you again. How's the grandson?" Brian smiled a genuine smile at the receptionist greeting him. "He should be walking by now, right?"

Dorothy sat behind her desk, stunned for a moment. Had he ever asked her about her life before today? "Um... oh, yeah...he's fine. And walking, yeah." She felt like an idiot but... who was this man?

Justin chuckled under his breath, knowing that Brian had a serious reputation for being the typical driven and distant boss, totally unaware of his employees' names, much less the make-up of their families. The reality was always different, though. Brian had sincerely cared for his employees, knew who each and every one was, even down to their birthdates. He just didn't let them know that he knew.

Another mask. Gone.

"Glad to hear that, Dorothy. Take good care of him." There was a deep sincerity in Brian's words. Every child should be taken care of, adored.

"I will, sir. Thank you." The older woman smiled warmly back at this new and improved Mr. Kinney as his young partner pulled him along down the short hallway. She watched him with that smile still on her face as he disappeared through his office door.

"Brian! God, it's good to see you back in this room!" Cynthia gave him a warm hug. She motioned for him to sit in his place behind his own desk. He shook his head, opting to take one of the wing chairs normally reserved for clients.

"Thanks for inviting me to dinner the other night, guys. Justin, the food was wonderful, and where did you find that wine? I love it!"

Justin rolled his eyes at the mention of the wine, and stuck his tongue out at his partner. "Churl, eh?"

"Twat."

Cynthia laughed at the two of them, delighted by the lightness of their banter. It had been a damned long, hard trip for Brian up to this point and she couldn't be more proud of him. And purely happy for her friend. 

"So, Ted should be here in a couple of minutes. He wanted to get some financials together for you to go over, just in case you wanted to see how things are running." She paused when Brian held up his hand, indicating that the financials weren't really necessary. "Brian... what's all this about. Are you finally ready to take the reins again? I'll gladly give you back your saddle," she teased just as Ted walked through the door, files in hand.

"Brian, Justin. Good to see you both. And thanks for dinner the other night." He smiled, his eyes growing wide as Brian stood and pulled him into a warm embrace.

"You're both welcome any time. And bring Blake by. We haven't seen him for some time, I'm afraid." Now that Brian was ‘coming out' he was actually looking forward to expanding their circle of friends again. Some of them.

"Thanks, Bri. We'll plan on that." He leaned against the edge of the desk, laying the files down carefully. "So, what's up?"

"What's up is me," Brian smirked as Justin dusted his fingers across the man's arm in a light smack. "I was talking about my time here, Sunshine," Brian said, his voice full of mock hurt.

"As you can both see, he hasn't changed completely," the young man laughed and thought ‘thank god.'

"Seriously. My time here is done, guys. I'm officially retiring as CEO of Kinnetik." Brian watched as disbelief settled on the faces of his trusted employees. "I will still own the company, but Cynthia, Ted... I want you both to run it. If you agree."

"Brian...you can't be serious! This company has been your life!" She knew there would be changes, probably fewer work hours on Brian's part, but to leave the company altogether? Cynthia was stunned.

"This company was my life. Actually it was a refuge, a great place to hide. I don't really need that anymore, Cyn. I've... found other things that are vastly more important than making another dollar. I have plenty of those." Brian reached over and locked his fingers with his partner's. "You two, on the other hand, still have your millions to make. So? Full partners? Equally?" Brian pulled his lips between his teeth and turned his doe eyes on the two, batting his lashes flirtatiously.

Cynthia laughed and Ted cleared his throat. "Uh... that look never worked on either one of us, boss," he said. "And as attractive as you are..." he laughed this time, "...uh... as the offer is, I don't think either one of us is in a financial position to buy into full partnerships, Bri."

"Christ, Theodore. Always looking a gift horse in the mouth," Brian mumbled to himself. He stood up and walked toward the bank of windows overlooking the parking lot. His voice softened, humbled as he continued. "Ted, you and Cynthia have more than paid any price for what I'm offering you. In fact, I could never hope to repay you for what you've both done for me. For us. You picked up the gauntlet and ran this company when we disappeared. No questions asked - you both just did it. You honored our friendship with your trust in me. You..." Brian's voice broke. "You respected us. Our privacy, our wishes. And you are both more than capable of running this company. You two are this company now."

Cynthia walked over to her friend and employer. She took both of his hands in hers, bringing them to her lips and holding them there while she gathered her own thoughts. After a long moment she spoke. "Nothing that we did, Brian, was done for any other reason than that we love you and trust you. If you need us to continue running Kinnetik for you while you heal, we will do that. But neither of us had any ulterior motive for anything we did. We simply did it because you are our friend."

He took her in his arms, kissing her deeply on the lips and hugging her closely to him as he replied simply, "I know."

"There are so many things that Brian wants to do now," Justin spoke up, knowing the emotions running through his lover at the moment. "The past few months have been difficult, and his - our - priorities have shifted. This isn't a payment for services rendered, guys. This is a thank you. And a hope that you will accept that thanks."

Cynthia pulled back and looked deeply into the beautiful hazel eyes. "Okay."

"Okay?" Brian asked simply, reminded of another time when this play had been performed.

"I accept."

He tilted his head and looked at her questioningly as Justin hid a small smirk behind his hand.

"I accept your offer to run Kinnetik as a full partner," Cynthia finally stated.

"I accept as well, Brian. Thank you for the opportunity, for everything." Ted's eyes were uncharacteristically moist.

"Good," Brian stated, a wide smile on his face. "Then let's get this party on the road!"

*******

He really didn't want to do this, but he knew it had to be done. Coming off the emotional high he had received from his visit to Kinnetik, this seemed like walking into the lion's den. Maybe it was. Maybe he was setting himself up in a trap, but... he had to. And now was the time.

Brian looked over at the building he knew so well. Knew every picture on the wall, every stain on the tables, every line of the menu by heart. Strange that it felt so foreign to him. That was another lifetime, another Brian Kinney. That man hadn't cared about himself, much less about anyone else. This man cared. And felt. And hurt openly. And wondered if he could actually do this. He blew out the breath he forgot he was holding.

"You sure you've got Alice's number programmed in case we need it?" He gripped the steering wheel more tightly, laying his forehead against the hard plastic.

"Yeah, but we won't need it." Justin gripped the back of Brian's neck, giving it a small squeeze. "You don't need to do this today, Bri."

"Yeah, yeah, I do," he said, sitting straight up in the seat again. "No time like the present."

Justin simply nodded and reached to open his door. "Remember, you are never alone, Brian. Never."

Brian smiled at the reminder, and opened his door.

There weren't many customers in the diner and Brian thanked the powers that be for the small favor. He led Justin to a booth in the far back corner, away from the heavy traffic area, just in case.

"Oh, my god."

Justin cringed at the volume of the familiar voice. He had scooted in beside Brian, essentially blocking him from the main aisle, but the eager woman slid in across from them and reached her body over the table to smack Brian lightly on the face.

"Fucking shit, Deb. Stop that," Justin faced down the surprised woman as Brian backed away from her.

"You don't see us, allow us to see you for months, you even get a fucking restraining order against us. You should consider a little slap a blessing, asshole." Debbie's anger and hurt were present in every word she spoke.

"By the way, Deb, I'm doing better. Thanks for asking." None of them missed the sarcasm. Maybe, Brian thought, this wasn't such a good idea after all.

"Well, you certainly look healthy. From the reports of Sunshine here I thought you were sick as shit. Too sick to see your family, apparently." Ahhh, Deb, Brian thought. When all else fails use a little maternal guilt.

"Not everyone bleeds when they are dying, Deb. Some things you just don't see. This was one of them."

"So, what are you doing here?" Right to the point. Deb never missed a trick on that front.

"I..." Brian struggled to put his reason for being here into words, into some form that his surrogate mother would understand. "I came to see if I was right. Whether or not we'd made a mistake. Looks like we didn't."

"What exactly does that mean, Brian? We were your family. You shut us out. How was that right?" Although Debbie's hurt and anger were still obvious, her voice had softened. God, she loved these boys. Why didn't they just understand that?

"What we were going through, Deb, was... difficult. We needed the seclusion, the separation from the family and its demands. We needed total support. We didn't need to be reminded that I'm an asshole. We didn't need to be slapped in the face or hit on the head. We didn't need to be torn because this person was jealous of the time that person spent with us. We needed peace, Deb, not toxins. We needed our family to respect our decisions, not second guess them as if you knew better than we did!" Brian's voice got louder as he spoke.

"Of course we would have supported you, Brian. We love you. I love you. We only want what's best for you..."

"No, Deb... Justin told you, again and again what was going on. He told you what the doctors said was best. And you refused to listen to him. Ignored him at every turn. If you really... really wanted what was best for us, you would've listened to him. But it wasn't about me, was it, Deb? Was it? It was aboutyour feeling's. Just like Michael's... his betrayal was about his feelings. It was never out of real concern for me, for us." Brian rested his face in his hands, his frustration and sadness with the whole matter evident. Justin touched his partner's thigh with his hand, just reminding him he wasn't alone. Never alone.

"I would never hurt you, Brian. You know that..."

"I love you, Deb. Always will. But more than anything I needed you to believe in me, as something more than a punk kid you took pity on. I know you loved me, Deb. I do. But I've also learned how conditional that love always was. I had to be what you wanted, do what you wanted..."

"No, Brian, that's not..."

"Today, Deb...when you saw me today, what's the first thing you did and said?" He paused for a moment and then answered his own question. "You slapped me, Deb. It was light, I know, and didn't really hurt me, but it wasn't a hug from a concerned mother. You called me an asshole. Didn't even ask how I was doing. You were focused on your hurt feelings. Focused on you... not on me. Even when you knew I had been... ill for a long time. Toxic love, Deb. Conditional."

Brian could see the pain he was causing this woman, and he hated it. Hated it. The things Deb and done and said were just business as usual in their relationship. But time, medication, therapy...whatever... had pointed out to Brian just how unloving some love can be. He let his fingers touch Deb's on the table. He watched the tears roll down the face of this woman who was the only real mother he'd ever known, his own tears matching hers. "It's going to take time."

"Brian?"

Brian and Justin both stiffened slightly at the sound of the voice behind them.

"Michael," Brian simply replied.

"You look good." Michael had finally realized just what he had lost after seen Emmett and Ted at the club. Ted's words - His friends do, Michael. His friends do - had become a sick mantra, running through Michael's every waking thought. He understood. He was no longer Brian's friend, no longer part of his circle, his life. Michael still didn't accept his own part in the loss of that friendship, however. Like his mother, he was often too busy beating his fists against a single tree to recognize he was lost in a forest. 

"Thanks. I feel good." Without making eye contact with his former friend, he turned to Justin. "We should get going."

Justin nodded in agreement and stood up, backing away to allow Brian to get out of the booth. Brian stood and turned to reach for his partner's hand. His eyes met the brown ones he knew so well. The ones that had laughed with him and cried with him so many times growing up. The ones that had betrayed him.

Michael had betrayed him, and he had been stung by that betrayal. And suddenly every slight, every dismissal that had ever been uttered by Michael during their friendship was right there, burning at the edges of Brian's emotions. All the times Michael had allowed Brian to take the blame for his own wrongdoings, all the times Michael had urged Brian to continue on a self destructive and dangerous path, all the times Michael had manipulated him, all the times Michael had dismissed Justin and negated his relationship with Brian... Everything... Right There. And Brian knew Michael had never really been a true friend. He had been conditional as well.

The conditional Novotny's.

Brian's eyes said everything Michael didn't want to hear, until he couldn't listen to those eyes any longer. 

"Good bye, Deb." Brian said quietly as he clasped the hand of his partner and let the door bell punctuate his words.