Title: Angry Kisses
Story Type: AU
Word Count: 3024
Warnings: Love, Passion, Romance, Angst, Anti-Michael…
Beta Queen: BigJ52
Banner: Predec2

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, plot, etc. are property of their respective owners, including, but not limited to Russell T. Davies, Cowlip, and Showtime. The author of this story is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended…

Summary: Brian and Justin’s journey of love…

Chapter Summary: They all struggle to accept the angry truth of the situation…


Just Kiss Me…

Chapter Twenty Three ~ Angry Kisses


Deb walks into the house, still fuming from her conversation with Brian.

“Carl! You’re here! I’ve been calling you all morning!”

“I know. I called the diner and they said you left after the morning rush. I’m guessing that the rumor mill is working overtime, and you’ve heard about Michael.” 

“You should have called and told me Michael had been arrested!”

“It’s been a busy morning, and I wanted to get to the bottom of what he did first.”

“He’s a good boy. He hasn’t done anything wrong!”

“Debbie! Please! Now, where have you been?”

“I… I had to talk to Brian!”

“Oh, and how did that go?”

“That damn asshole wouldn’t tell me anything! He said it would be better if Michael told me what happened.”

“That sounds like good advice.”

Debbie huffs in anger. “So, will you please tell me what happened?”

“I don’t think now is the right time. You need to calm down, and prepare yourself to hear some real truths about your son.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means you need to take a good long hard look at him, without rose-colored glasses.”

“I know my son better than anyone else! This is all Brian’s fault!”

“It’s always Brian’s fault, isn’t it? You always blame him, denying that Michael may be guilty.”

“Brian’s a hellion! He’s always been a troublemaker and a bad influence on Michael!”

“Debbie! Stop!”

“I will not!”

“Tell me. Before Brian moved here, before Michael ever met him, did Michael ever get into trouble?”

“Well… He was just a boy. All boys get into trouble.”

“Ah ha… But once he met Brian, he became an innocent angel who could do no wrong?”

Debbie’s steaming, so angry that she’s being made to reevaluate Michael’s behavior. She can’t help her mind from drifting back to her conversation with Jennifer just a week ago. She knows she’s wrong to deny Michael’s bad behavior, but her baby’s in jail. He just couldn’t have done something so bad he’d be arrested.

“You don’t understand. Once he met Brian they started skipping school together, and sneaking alcohol, getting drunk. Eventually they started doing drugs. I heard them fooling around in Michael’s bedroom one afternoon, so I stormed in there and put a stop to that.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t have.”

“What?”

“I’m just saying maybe you shouldn’t have interfered. Maybe if they had explored their sexual feelings towards one another as teenagers, Michael wouldn’t have always carried a torch for Brian for all these years. Maybe he would have accepted that Brian didn’t feel the same way about him, and he would have moved on. Instead he’s never let go of the past, always hoping that Brian will love him romantically someday.”

“You’ve got a lot of nerve questioning me like this!”

“For Christ sake, Deb!”

Debbie pouts, crossing her arms over her chest defiantly. Now Carl knows where Michael learned that behavior.

“I’m not through! You need to hear this!”

Debbie’s shocked. Carl’s never talked to her like this before, so direct and to the point.

“As far as the rest of those things, don’t you think that Michael was a willing participant in skipping school, drinking and trying drugs? Debbie, all teenagers try those things. It would have happened whether he met Brian or not.”

She hates to accept that Brian isn’t responsible for all of Michael’s problems. But she knows in her heart that Carl’s right, just like Jennifer was right. The unspoken truth is, she’s the one to blame, not Brian. Everyone always accuses Brian of reverting Michael back to behaving like he’s fourteen. But she knows that’s not really true, she knows that it’s her. She enables him, always making excuses for him. Unintentionally she’s taught him to always let others take the blame for his mistakes. She may have only been trying to protect him, but in the process she’s never let him grow up and become a man.

“Debbie? Are you alright?”

“Yes. No. I don’t know. It’s hard to accept that I’ve made so many mistakes raising him. I just wanted to protect him, because he always seemed so vulnerable and defenseless. Brian’s always been the strong one, always been the one to protect Michael.”

“Don’t you think that maybe he did it because you expected him to? That he was afraid of losing your love, if he didn’t do what you expected? From what I understand he was abused at home. He was just a boy and needed your love and understanding. So he knew better than to stand up for himself and tell the truth; he couldn’t risk you turning your back on him.”

“I never thought about it that way.”

“Deb. I don’t want to fight, or hurt your feelings any more than I already have, but you owe him an apology. You have to stop threatening to withdraw your love if he doesn’t do what you expect. And don’t try and tell me you don’t do that, because you do. You do it all the time, and I can see it in his eyes how much it hurts, even now. You make both Michael and Brian feel like they’re fourteen again, and not thirty-five-year-old men.”

“I’ve fucked them both up. It’s all my fault. I’m a horrible mother.”

“You’re not a bad person, Debbie, but you have to stop coddling Michael, and bullying Brian.”

“I’ve never bullied Brian!”

“Deb! Think about it. You demand him to do what you say, and if he doesn’t then you threaten him!”

“I… No… That can’t be right.”

“Do you even know what the definition of bullying is? Bullying is the use of force, threat, or coercion…”

“Oh God! What am I going to do?”

“I know change is hard, but it will get easier once you recognize you’re doing it.”

“I didn’t realize… I never meant to… It’s just my way sometimes…”

“Are you going to be alright? I have to get back to work. I’ve been gone too long as it is.”

“What about Michael?”

“He’s being arraigned this afternoon. After that we’ll know more.”

“I should be there for him.”

“I really think that’s a bad idea. Come visit him after his hearing, and see if he’s able to tell you what happened. I’m sure he’ll be mortified if you’re in the courtroom during the proceedings.”

“So, it’s that bad?”

“Yes. It’s not something you need to hear for the first time in a room full of people and reporters.”

“Reporters? Why reporters?”

“Deb. The local paper prints a weekly report of the police beat. They’re in the courtroom for all arraignments.”

“It’s going to be in the papers?”

“Yes. Just like Ted’s arrest was in the paper. There’s nothing I can do about it.”

“So please, Deb, go see him after his court appearance. Let him tell you in person. Don’t read about it in the paper first.”

~~~

Justin’s POV

Brian’s quiet, sitting in silence on the sofa staring off into space. I come up behind him, rubbing his shoulders, kissing the top of his head. 

“Don’t let her get to you. She always reacts without thinking things through.”

He just continues to stare straight ahead. I wrap my arms around him and hold him tight, he hugs me back just as tight. After a few minutes I lean in and kiss him, telling him he needs to get some sleep. He’s only had a few hours and he needs his rest. After he wakes up, when he’s ready, he’ll tell me all about what happened.

I lie down next to him, and he wraps his body around mine resting his head on my stomach. I stroke his hair gently as he relaxes to my touch, and drifts off to sleep. I lie awake next to him, wondering what could have happened that was so bad he had Michael arrested. Obviously he broke into the loft, but knowing Michael, we should have seen that coming. After all he didn’t have any place to go. Deb refused to take him in, and he can’t afford a hotel.

He could have broken into the small safe that Brian has hidden in our closet, there’s some cash in there for emergencies. Ever since Vic was arrested and we had to scramble to get him out of jail, Brian’s kept a reserve on hand. I suppose he could have guessed the combination, it’s not that hard. It’s the date we met, and the day Gus was born. We should probably change it to something more secure, and less obvious.

I slip out of bed, hoping Brian continues sleeping well into the afternoon. Lord knows he needs it. I search the kitchen for something to eat, even though I know the cupboards are bare. I decide to go pick Gus up from preschool and go grocery shopping. I call to let them know I’ll be picking Gus up early so hopefully he’ll be ready when I get there. But he’s not there, apparently Lindsay never dropped him off this morning.

I sit in the jeep, trying to calm down before I go up to the house. I can’t help wondering why Lindsay kept him home. I ring the door bell and Gus opens the door, excited to see me.

“Hey, buddy. You’re not sick, are you?”

“Nope! I’m great! I was hoping you’d come and pick me up. Momma said you weren’t coming today, because Uncle Mikey’s in jail.”

I scoop him up in my arms and kiss him. I’m irritated at Lindsay for telling Gus about Michael. I just hope she hasn’t told him any details, because I don’t even know any of the details.

“Justin. What in the world are you doing here?”

“I called Great Beginnings Preschool but they said you never dropped Gus off this morning.”

“Well, with everything that’s happened, I thought it was best he stayed home today.”

“Why? Is he sick?”

“Because of Michael, of course.”

“I don’t understand? What does Michael have to do with Gus attending daycare?”

“He’s been arrested.”

“So I’ve heard.”

“You have? What’s going on? I’ve called Mel, but she can’t talk to me right now.”

“I don’t think Mel can legally tell you what’s going on, if she’s Michael’s attorney.”

“Don’t be ridiculous. Of course she’ll tell me. I should know, he’s JR’s father.”

“Yes, that’s why I’m surprised that she’s handling Michael’s case. You know, conflict of interest and all.”

“What? Oh, that’s nonsense. So tell me, what happened exactly?”

“I don’t really know any more than you do.”

“Really? You’re going to act all superior, and not tell me why Brian called the police on him?”

Justin shakes his head. Nothing surprises him anymore concerning their dysfunctional family these days.

“I just came by to pick up Gus. Are his things ready?”

“I told you. I don’t want him going out today.”

“Lindsay! I really wish you wouldn’t discuss Michael’s situation in front of Gus, or use it as an excuse to evade following our visitation schedule.”

“I’m all ready!”

They both turn to look at Gus, who’s standing there holding his little suitcase and teddy bear.

“Perfect, now give your mom a kiss good-bye.”

“Lindsay, I’ll drop him back on Sunday night. Just like we agreed to before we went to New York.”

“Justin! I don’t think he should go, considering everything that’s happened with Michael.”

“I’ll ask you once again. What does Michael’s problems have to do with Gus’s visitation schedule with Brian and me?”

“Well. I bet Brian’s upset about everything that’s happened.”

“Yeah, I bet Mel’s upset too.”

She turns and glares at him.

“Okay then, we’ll see you on Sunday night.”

Lindsay calls after them. “Justin!”

She’s still pouting about Justin’s taking Gus for the rest of the week. She’s frustrated, hating that Gus is spending so much time with them, and that she’s not in control. 

“Is mommy mad?”

“Don’t worry. She’ll get over it.”

“Now how would you like to help me pick out what to make for dinner for the next couple of days?”

“I get to choose?”

They spend the next hour and a half getting all of Gus’s favorite foods. Brian’s up when they get home and he helps them unpack the groceries. Justin makes them lunch while Brian plays with Gus in the living room. He’s glad he picked up Gus, as Brian really needed the distraction. Besides, they’ve missed him while they were out of town.

“Justy! Look what Daddy brought me from New York!”

Gus holds up the Lionel toy train Brian bought at an antique toy store. Brian was like a little kid when we found this place. He’s always wanted a train set since he was a child, but of course his parents never bought him one. Brian spent hours in the toy store, and a small fortune on vintage trains and all the accessories. I’m happy seeing the two of them together, so excited, talking about setting up the train tracks and train station together. I knew this was a great idea; it will give them something to bond over while letting him recapture his missed youth. 

I made him agree to not give Gus all of the trains at once, emphasizing that he needs to spread them out over holidays and birthdays. Yes, Brian has come around on the idea of celebrating birthdays. Seeing the thrill and excitement in Gus’s eyes has made him realize that he needed to let go of his anger and disappointment from his childhood. After lunch Gus is tired and ready for a nap, and so is Brian. I can tell he didn’t sleep very well after I left the house this morning. So they both snuggle down together on the sofa and rest.

Brian wakes up an hour or so later, and while Gus is still asleep he gives me a brief overview of the situation with Michael. I’m dumbfounded. Lying and breaking into the loft was bad enough, but wearing Brian’s clothes, and jacking off in our bed just makes me sick to my stomach. Brian tells me that he downloaded the webcam images from the Cloud, and fast forwarded through the footage. He was disgusted by what he saw, and he tells me that it’s probably better if I don’t watch it. Of course, he’s already forwarded it to Carl to present to the judge for review at Michael’s arraignment this afternoon.

I feel nauseous, and I can’t help feeling violated by Michael’s actions. I’m just grateful that he didn’t destroy anything at the loft. Brian looks uneasy and I know there’s more that he’s not telling me. 

“Brian? What is it?”

“Did he ruin some of your clothes? They can easily be replaced.”

“He… He just makes me so angry.”

“What? Did he shred them with scissors or something?”

“Not exactly. It doesn’t matter.”

“Okay…”

“Listen, Justin. I’m not even sure I want to keep the loft.”

“Brian. It can’t be that bad? Can it?”

“I don’t know. I just don’t know.”

“But we have so many memories there, and it really is the perfect place for Gus and me to spend our afternoons.”

He makes a sour face like the idea of Gus and me being there is outrageous, and he’ll never allow it.

“I don’t want to talk about it anymore.”

“Okay.”

I’m still kind of foggy on exactly what happened at the loft, but it’s obvious that Brian’s uncomfortable talking about it. I’ll let it go for now, but I can tell it’s really painful for him. I can’t help wondering what really happened. But all I can do is wait until he’s ready to talk about it. I know I should have mentioned Lindsay’s strange behavior but he’s already so upset, I decide to wait. 

~~~

Michael’s hearing went as predicted. Melanie pleaded her case for bail and after several motions the judge finally lowered it to $300,000, which of course Michael can’t come up with. Mel calls Debbie to give her an update on Michael’s case. After much pleading and begging on Deb’s part, and against Carl’s better judgement he agrees to let Debbie use both their houses as collateral for his bail bond. Debbie’s happy and she goes to tell Michael the good news, assuring him that she’ll be there for him now, and allow him to stay in his old room until his court date. Carls’not happy about it, but he realizes that it’s probably better having him under his roof where he can keep an eye on him. 

Michael thanks her for bailing him out, and agrees to tell her everything once he gets home. Melanie explains that there’s no need for her to stay at the police station while she posts his bail. Reluctantly Debbie agrees, after Mel tells her it will be several hours before he’s processed out of the system. She gives Michael her emergency cash, a hundred-dollar bill to take a taxi home from jail.

Deb spends the afternoon making all of Michael’s favorite dishes, Antipasto salad, Lasagna, Garlic Bread and Cannoli. As she expected, Carl ends up working late, so her and Emmett fuss around the kitchen, setting the table and finally opening a bottle of wine while they wait for Michael’s return. Neither one of them knows the specifics about what happened at the loft and it’s driving them crazy. As Emmett refills their glasses, he empties the bottle. They both look at the clock, wondering why it’s taking Michael so long to get home. Finally Deb calls Mel to find out when she should expect him.

“What? I don’t understand. Where could he be?”

“Okay then, thanks Mel.”

Debbie turns to Emmett. “She said he was processed and released at 4 o’clock this afternoon.”

“Really?” 

It’s now eight o’clock at night.

“I’m worried about him. I hope he’s okay.”

“You know, Deb. I bet he just stopped off at Woody’s to have a drink before coming home.”

They both know Em’s trying to stay positive and be supportive, but they both have a bad feeling about this.

TBC…