The Gardener



The girls wanted a garden they have a garden but they wanted a small patch of earth cleared so they can plant flowers and vegetables.  So what the hell does it have to do with us?  It’s their backyard, why can’t they do it?  I argue with Justin he argues back; I know not in Mel’s ‘delicate’ condition.  Shit, so how did I get involved?  Lindsey wanted Justin’s opinion not mine so why am I standing here covered in dirt with a pitch fork in one hand and a shovel in the other.  Fuck, I hate this shit.



Justin looks pretty hot.  He’s wearing shorts and an old faded t-shirt, I make him wear a hat to protect him.  It’s still early spring but the sun is hot today.  Did I mention he looks hot.  I lick my lips and stare a little.  He grins but its back to being farmer Brown.  Fuck.



He promised the girls so what happens; the first day we mark out the area he trips on a root, falls and cuts his leg on a stone.  I clean him up make him sit, Lindsey bandages him up and then I tell him to point, tell me the area he wants cleared.  He says he wants to help but the cut is pretty deep so I tell him just to supervise.  So he sits and directs the work.  I must admit by the end of the afternoon the little patch of ground is clear, neat, no stones or roots to impede planting.  His leg hurts a little so I help him to the car; we’ll be back in the morning.

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Ok so I’m up at the crack of dawn on a Sunday; well not the crack of dawn but I’m standing in the mud in the munchers’ backyard.  Shit it rained last night so my nice little patch of ground is mud and I’m standing in it.



Before planting Lindsey wants a little fence so now I’m standing with a hammer, fence posts and whatever else it takes to put up a fence.  Justin’s leg is better so he’s measuring, staking out where the posts are to be pounded into the ground.  Thank god it’s a small pre-fab type fence so no concrete or nails needed.



Oh shit, clumsy twat he hit his thumb with the hammer, the little shit.  Got to get some ice for it; at least the sun’s out, so I make him sit and point and tell me where the posts go and I put up the fence.



Now the ground looks like crap so I have to rake it; got some fertilizer and better top soil for the vegetable patch.  Great just what I need, I stink, I smell like horse shit.  If he girls laugh at me I swear I’ll throw the stuff in the kitchen and let them deal with the smell.



Okay the first batch of flowers go in.  Spring flowers already forced to bloom not just bulbs and the long wait till next year.  Fuck, now the artists are ‘discussing’ color schemes, where should the plants go, what colors go together, the bigger ones in the back.  I can’t wait so while the two argue it out I plant.  I do have an eye for color and how things should go I didn’t spend all those years as an ad man wasting my time.



By the time they’re finished with their discussion I’m done.  I’ve put away the tools and washed the mud off my hands.  I still stink and I need a long hot shower.  Well well, they’ve noticed, it got quiet and I’m in the house sipping a cold one.



The two artists stand there looking a little stunned nodding their pretty blond heads; they like it.  Shit like I had any doubts.  I’m tired its time to go home.  Next week the vegetables.

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Another Saturday morning and I’m covered in dirt again.  The sun is real warm I’ve been getting a tan.  Justin got a little burnt last week so I made put on an old shirt of mine with long sleeves it was either that or sunscreen.  He didn’t want to feel greasy so he chose the shirt.



So now we’re huddled at the veg end of the patch and the blonds are discussing what seeds go where so I wait.  What the hell?  Shit he’s stumbled into a hornet’s nest.  Shit oh my god he’s stung.  Not too bad he swiped at away before the stinger worked its way in too deep.  I have to watch him though he’s so allergic to all kinds of shit.  So we always carry medicine for him.  So we get the chair give him his medicine.  It makes him a little drowsy so I put him in the shade and let him sleep.



Lindsey tells me where she’d like the veggies to go so here I am again farmer Brown planting lettuce, tomatoes, cucumbers and a small row of corn.  Who’s going to eat all of that?  I don’t care.  Mel comes out to see the progress; humph I even impressed her but she swears its all Justin and Lindsey.  Yeah, yeah, shit.  She starts to complain how are we going to know what was planted.  Does she really think I’m an idiot or not thorough?  I went to the garden center and picked up those little signs you can write on.  Justin did some very nice calligraphy so now I place the signs in each row and stick my tongue out at her.  She grumbles and goes back in to the house.



All done I water in the plants and seeds.  Maybe I’ll come back tomorrow.  There are a few more plants I want to put in; some that’ll bloom in the summer and through into the fall.  Oh and marigolds, yeah they stink but it helps keeps the squirrels away from the other plants and they’re pretty.  Fuck did I say pretty?  God what am I doing?



Justin’s awake; the swelling on his arm has gone down.  We’ll be back tomorrow.

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Sunday morning and the little twat’s still asleep.  He worked the late shift at the diner, oh well let him sleep.  The coffee will be on for him when he wakes up.  I’ll leave a note.  Got to get to the garden center early they’re having a sale on annuals and perennials; got to get there before the blue haired biddies rummage through and get the good stuff.



I get to the girls’, explain about Justin.  Gus comes out and tries to help.  He’s developing an eye for color and symmetry; must be his mom and Justin.



By lunchtime we’re done.  The marigolds look nice so do the impatiens.  The daisies and coneflowers will bloom through the summer so they’ll be lots of color and the hostas will fill in the gaps.



I brought extra clothes with me so us gardeners take a shower together and put on fresh clothes.  The moms are impressed.



Justin called he was sorry he couldn’t help, just as well the marigolds would have made him sneeze.  He can help me weed next week.



This wasn’t so bad; maybe one day Justin and I will have a garden.



Fuck!  What am I thinking?





Sabina

11/18/03