Gus got up glaring at Brian, he picked up Cameron saying they were going to get ice cream. I rubbed my face; since we’d been here you could cut the tension with a knife. Cameron was the only one who didn’t really understand what was going on. Brian barely got more than one word answers to anything he tried to talk to Gus about, and when he asked Gus about school it just seemed to piss Gus off.

“That went well.” Brian tells me.

“Until this year you wouldn’t have needed to ask him. I was surprised when he volunteered to come here.” I tell him.

“He told me I was living up to Jack.” He tells me.

“He’s angry, and it doesn’t help when Mel runs her mouth.” I tell him.

“You're angry, but you're handling it.” He tells me.

“I’m trying to deal with what we need to, the anger isn’t going anywhere.” I tell him.

“I can’t change what I did this past year, but if it means anything, never once was it because I didn’t want us to stay together.” He tells me.

“Can we deal with only what matters right now? We both need to talk about what’s going to happen when you're released.” I tell him.

“When are you moving back home?” He asks.

“We aren’t, you're moving into my home. The house we shared isn’t my home anymore.” I tell him.

“You bought a house, and didn’t tell me?” He asks.

“Are you really going to go there?” I ask.

“Why?” He asks.

“Because since you and I bought that house, it never felt like mine. I don’t like the fact that Deb and Michael treated our home as if it was theirs. I bought a house to get away from the door that admitted people who treated me like I was there to wait on them when they showed up. If you have a problem with it, truthfully I don't give a shit. Just understand the first time I open the door at my house to Deb or Michael, you can pack your shit and let them take care of you.” I tell him.

“What you want is all that’s going to matter. If they show up, it won’t be because I invited them.” He tells me.

“The doctor said you should be able to go home tomorrow. Which means I need to see if Drew or Ted can come and take you home.” I tell him, after we sat around without saying anything for a couple minutes.

“Why can’t you?” He asks.

“Business. Sawyer White of Sawyer Outdoor Sports is coming to sign off on his campaign, then I agreed to have dinner with him before he leaves.” I tell him.

“Why did he decide to go with Kinnetik? Every time I approached him he said he was happy with the firm he was using.” He asks.

“We ran into each other in New York a couple months ago.” I tell him.

“What were you doing in New York?” He asks.

“Getting away from here. Gus wanted to look at NYU. Sawyer ran into us when we went out with my agent. When I mentioned I’d been working at Kinnetik, he said he was ready for a change. Which reminds me; Gus agreed to go with Lindsay tomorrow, so I need to call my mom and see if she can watch Cameron.” I tell him.

“I’ll be home, so why do you need to call your mother?” He asks.

“I wasn’t sure if you’d be okay with Cameron, you’re still recovering and I didn’t want you to have to chase him around. If Gus was home than he could at least take over.” I tell him.

“Where is he going with Lindsay?” He asks.

“I didn’t ask.” I tell him, because the truth wasn’t something I wanted to tell him.

“He doesn’t want to stay in the house with me?” He asks.

“What do you expect? He stayed at the house hoping to talk to you, and once again you show up drunk with Michael. All he saw was the same shit he’s been dealing with all year. You have a lot to prove to Gus before he’s going to meet you even halfway.” I tell him.

“Are you even willing to meet me halfway or are you going to take off? Someone let me know that you agreed to go again.” He tells me.

“I have to be there anyway. It’s not like I’m going to be gone for any longer than I would have anyway.” I tell him.

“Justin, we agreed when we had Cameron that it was over.” He tells me.

“And I thought when you married me, it meant something, but then I guess I was wrong.” I tell him.

“I know everything I did this year was shit, but don’t make my mistakes.” He tells me.

“I need to go, I have to get some things ready for Sawyer.” I tell him, not wanting to turn this into a fight.

“Justin, I want to find a way back to us. I know it’s not going to be easy, but I don’t care what it takes to get us back.” He tells me.

“You want to know what really bothers me? There’s a part of me that just wants US back, I just don’t see how, when even as much as I love you, I honestly no longer like you.” He tells me, walking out the door.

BRIAN

Gus came in the door a couple hours later and sat staring at me. “I just need to know one thing?” He asks me.

“Anything.” I tell him.

“Why did you let Michael be more important than all of us?” He asks.

“He was never more important than any of you. It’s hard to explain, but if you need me to I’ll tell you.” I tell him.

“I’m here because Justin asked me to give you a chance. Not because I think you deserve it.” He tells me.

“When I was growing up, the only place I had to go when it got bad was Deb’s house. Deb always had a warm dinner and kind words. To me it never mattered what they needed me to do, just that the door was always open when I needed it. Deb only ever asked that I take care of Michael, and it wasn’t a lot to ask. When Ben died, he made me promise to continue doing what I’ve always done where Michael was concerned. I didn’t think about what I was doing, just that it’s what I’ve always done for Michael.” I tell him.

“Why would Deb and Ben expect you to take care of Michael, he’s a grown man. Isn’t he actually older than you?” He asks.

“It’s just what they did, and I let them.” I tell him.

“You want to know what really pissed me off and still does? That you ALWAYS defended Michael, and treated Justin like he was wrong. It always made me wonder what you would say to me if I said anything to Michael. It’s why Justin said he stopped trying to defend himself when it came to Michael. I need to go, mom’s waiting for me.” He tells me.

Gus stood there for a second but came over to me, and hugged me. When he pulled back he had tears in his eyes. “I’m scared for you.” He tells me running out the door.

Alone with my thoughts, I realized it was time to stop talking and start fixing my life. I called Ted, because Justin needed me to stop leaving everything up to him. Ted came with the files for everything that Justin had taken over while I was off acting like I didn’t have any responsibilities other than Michael.

“When did Justin start helping?” I asked, after seeing four new clients were add and three older clients had resigned with us.

“Seven months ago, he came in when no one could find you. Then he just started coming in every day, helping without us asking him.” He tells me.

“I’ve been trying to get Sawyer for years, what made him finally come to Kinnetik.” I asked, seeing he signed for five years with Kinnetik.

“He’d been asking around when his contract was up with his old Ad firm. People were saying good things about Kinnetik and then he was interested when he heard Justin would be running the campaign.” He tells me.

“Why would it matter that it was Justin running the campaign?” I ask.

“Sawyer’s an art collector, and it just happens that one of his favorite artists is Justin. At first I think Sawyer agreed to the meeting to see what Justin was doing, but when he saw the boards Justin and Cynthia put together, it no longer had anything to do with Justin, but the campaign.” He tells me.

“Once I’m out of here, I need to meet with you and Cynthia. Justin shouldn’t have had to do my job.” I tell him.

“I’ll let Cynthia know, and we’ll be there when you're ready. Before I go; Nick came by and told me about Ben putting you in charge of everything for Michael. I can have it so Michael is in charge of it. Ben didn’t make any conditions if you didn’t want the responsibility.” He tells me.

“I was going to ask you to handle it.” I tell him.

“I can’t. I promised Blake that I wouldn’t put myself in a position where Deb and Michael could expect anything from me. He doesn’t like the way Deb expects us to go against our partners if she asks… shit, sorry.” He tells me.

“For the first time in my life, I can say I am too.” I tell him.

JUSTIN

Dinner with Sawyer started out with business but then about our families and careers. His wife was asking why I scaled back on photography in the last few years. I realized after telling her about Gus and Cameron, that it wasn't because of Brian that I stopped, but because I didn’t want to ever have Gus or Cameron go through what Gus did all those years ago. After saying goodbye to them, I wasn’t ready to go home, so instead, I drove around for a while. I needed time to think without anyone around to offer an opinion. I drove by Carnegie and called Hunter to check on him. He met me at a bar near the campus. Hunter never said much about what had been going on, and I appreciated it, because he seemed to understand I didn’t need anyone telling me what they think.

He was sitting at a table when I came in, watching a game on the TV above the bar. I grabbed us drinks and joined him.

“How did you get a free night?” He asks, since normally Cameron was with me everywhere I went.

“Brian’s with him. I just didn’t feel like going home yet.” I tell him.

“Yeah, Deb's been burning up my answering machine. It's been a ball listening to her bitch about everything; from poor Michael to you taking Michael’s toy home. By the way, how is Brian?” He asks.

“He’s getting better right now. He ended up in the hospital for exhaustion and dehydration. Then I got the news he needed treatment for cancer. Which I didn’t find out until after I finally sent the divorce papers to him.” I tell him.

“Are you still planning to do it?” He asks.

“Right now I’m not sure what to do.” I tell him.

“Is it the cancer that’s stopping you?” He asks.

“Not really. From what the doctor said, once he does chemo, he should be fine. It’s more that I don’t know if I can trust him to put me and our kids first.” I tell him.

“Trust can be earned, but not if you don’t give him a chance. If he fucks up again, then you’ll know what’s more important to him.” He tells me.

“I’m more worried right now about Gus. Cameron really doesn’t get what’s going on. I got Gus to at least go talk to him.” I tell him.

“I’m sure that made Mel happy.” He tells me, rolling his eyes.

“I’m not happy with Mel, so she can kiss my ass right now.” I tell him.

“Is she still talking shit in front of Jenny and Gus?” He asks.

“Every chance she gets. It’s like she expects me to jump on the train and trash Brian with her. Even though I don’t like Michael, Jenny doesn’t need to hear it either.” I tell him.

“Jenny called me a while back asking if it was true that Ben was the one who made sure Jenny got things. I guess Mel was bitching that without Ben, Michael forgot he was Jenny’s father. I got on Mel’s ass for it and was told by Mel, she wasn’t going to let Jenny make the mistake of thinking Michael is anything but exactly who he is.” He tells me.

“Jenny would have figured it out eventually, but I agree, she didn’t need Mel’s way of explaining it.” I tell him.

“Back to Brian, I’m not saying to just forgive him, but at least try to find a way to be friends again.” He tells me.

After that we argued over the game, and Hunter left to finish studying. It was late so I pulled into my driveway to see Brian outside, sitting on one of the chairs on the porch.

“Dinner must have been unusually good.” He tells me.

“The same as any business dinner.” I tell him.

“Where were you? Sawyer called to say he and his wife would love to have us to dinner if we come to New York.” He quizzes me.

“I went for a drink with a friend. It’s the first time I’ve been free to do anything.” I tell him, walking past him.

“Who was the friend?” He asks.

“The same one I’ve been going places with the last year.” I tell him, not liking the way he thinks he can question me. “I’m going to bed, if you need anything I’m only three doors down from your room.” I tell him, not stopping until I closed my bedroom door.