CHAPTER 40 - YEAH YOU ARE NOT IN CHARGE...FIRE-FIRE-FIRE-FIRE
LIBERTY AVENUE HOTEL - SUNDAY MORNING
MICHAEL
I pretty much passed out when I got back to the hotel. Still can’t see why I couldn’t stay with Uncle Vic... it’s my family home for fuck sake!
But the one good thing that has come out of this is that I am this close to a Captain Astro figurine that I have been after for years! I had to sell pretty much all of my collectibles on the swauptions because he’s asking a lot of money for it, but come on! It’s Captain Astro! And with my smaller collections, I can put them in my cases, thus saving me a shitload of money on storage costs!
I rummage through my case and find the bottle of shower gel that Albert, Mr Oh So Clever and Observant, obviously didn’t notice when he packed for me and take that to the bathroom. It’s one of my favourites and it smells of cedar. I put the shower on and wait for the water to heat.
VIC’S LOFT
VIC
That’s the last of my stuff. All the furniture and stuff that Debs didn’t want has been binned and basically, I just moved in with Shiitake and my personal effects. I have to say though that I wouldn’t change a thing in here! Even though he’s the Stud, he is a Stud with very good taste. All I would do is soften it up a bit with throws and cushions. Shiitake has already found a spot that Brian told me, I emphasise, me, about and is sitting on the sill, watching the world go by… This is why I swear that when they are together they talk!
“Uncle Vic, can we come up?!” Gus shouts from the bottom of the stairs.
“Yes!” I call out then head to the kitchen and marvel at the top of the line products, all of which look brand new and unused. I look around for the waffle maker as I can see the box, but can’t find it.
“Are you all settled?” He asks and I smile as Nikita hops up next to Shiitake and waits for him to lie down before resting on him.
“Yes. And your dad has made it clear that I should make sure you eat properly. His working hours meant he couldn’t keep a proper eye, but I can. Now what do you want to eat?”
“Oh he’s such a dude my dad!” Gus smiles in delight. “Be right back!” He then clatters down the stairs and I look to the heavens, praying that he grows into those legs of his! He comes back up with a raft of papers. “Can we start with the breakfast tacos please and I’ll help? Also, I am pretty sure we need to go shopping.”
“Of course and yes, we do.” I read the recipe and then check the cupboards. “Now I know how your dad stayed so trim!” I laugh as I double check my two page A4 double sided shopping list. “You will save a shitload of money cooking for yourself and I’m just the man to teach you. So let’s go!”
THE OLD CHURCH HOUSE - AN HOUR LATER
JUSTIN
Again, I am being led by my nose. After last night’s revelations, we just crashed out when we got back. But it was on the walk back that Brian asked me about the duck confit, as in he’s never seen me eat it. When I told him that because it takes so long to do that I am too pissed to eat it, he just nodded.
I pad into the kitchen and find him frying something. “Hey...have a seat!” He calls out, without turning around.
“How did you know I was here? I am a ninja like walker.” I slide into the seat and he produces a glass of orange juice and a kiss.
“Yeah well, the ninja like walker should perhaps not slather himself in honey caramel shower gel and body oil. I smelt you coming.”
I poke out my tongue. “Even over these lovely smells?”
“Yeah. I seem to be locked onto you. Odd that.” He demurs.
“Mmm stay that way please.” I smile at him and then frown. “That smells like duck...oh what happened to the client who you had the idea for?”
“Client? Oh sorry, meant to tell you... He wants to buy the recipes from you and Emmy.”
“How many of them?” I take the carafe of coffee and pour us a cup each then pad over to the love seat with mine, after putting his by him.
“All of them. Take mine too, please. This takes a while.”
I stare at him and wait for him to smirk, he doesn’t. “Brian?” I prompt and prod.
“He’s serious. You and Emmy need to have a meeting with him and talk about it. Just you two; nothing to do with me or Drew. How about some cherries while we wait?” I just nod and go to the fridge and inwardly sigh. I hate fridge cold fruit! “Yours are under the cloche on the table.” He calls over his shoulder...like I said, he so loves me!
“You’re right, I do.” He grins as he comes to join me on the love seat and I frown. “That’s your he so loves me smile.”
“And I love you, too.” I say and put my feet in his lap then sigh as he strokes my feet. And after 10 minutes, I have to smirk as he starts to eat his cherries that were in the fridge. “You are so odd!”
“Not odd. They are just the right temperature. It’s not my fault that you set the temp in there to Siberia!” He grumbles and then rolls his eyes at my beseeching look. “And you agree! Alright, but come this end.” He lifts this bowl and I sigh happily as I lean against his chest and we eat the cherries.
“So what are you cooking?” I ask as we watch Hero and Moon play in the garden.
“Duck confit hash with chilli fried eggs.” He replies. I look up at him and get a kiss on my forehead. “I know you like duck, so I will cook it for you. Now how do you want your eggs, in about 20 minutes?”
“Sunny side, just cooked through and thank you.”
“Perfect.”
“Let’s hope it stays that way.” He mutters and then sighs as his phone rings. Then, I hear the thunk of his head against the wall. “Lindsay…”
DAYS INN HOTEL AND CONFERENCE CENTRE, BUTLER
LINDSAY’S ROOM
LINDSAY
“Pick up for fuck sake!” I gnash my teeth in frustration as it goes, yet again, to voicemail. “I cannot believe this has happened! All I did was try to discipline my daughter!”
Start of flashback
LINDSAY’S APARTMENT - LAST NIGHT
LINDSAY
I stagger to the door to answer the insistent and far too fucking late knocking and find myself faced with two uniformed police officers and two stern faced women. “Yes?”
“Lindsay Peterson?”
“Yes.” I reply my heart racing as my fear mounts.
“May we come in? This is in regards to the charges levied against you by Norman…” I virtually drag her through the door. “Ma’am, unhand me!” She glares and I let go. “As I was saying, I am Det. Frost. These are Officers Nolan and Croft and this Edna Moore from Child Protection Services. We are here to take you to the station, where you will be formally charged with the battery of Effy Fukowski and then to escort you to a hotel outside the 20 mile perimeter that the court order here enforces. Kindly pack an overnight bag.”
I stare at them for a couple of minutes before starting to laugh. “Oh, good one! You almost had me there! Kindly tell Norman that this joke is not funny and I will be advising my attorney of his attempt at humour. Now leave my premises!” I snap, stalking to the door and wrenching it open.
“Ma’am, the Pittsburgh Police Department never jokes about the assault on a minor. I have shown you my badge, advised you of why we are here and asked you politely to come with us. Now unless you want to add resisting arrest to your charge sheet, I suggest you do as I’ve asked quickly and quietly.”
OUTSIDE 57TH PRECINCT - TWO HOURS LATER
“Where are we dropping you, Ms Peterson?!”
I hear the clicking and drag my mind and eyes back to the present. “Wh-what?” I look at a furious looking Officer Nolan, but he just returns my look coldly and impatiently.
“Where do you want dropping off? I have, unlike you, a family to get to. Now where?!”
It was an oppressively hostile journey to Days Inn Hotel and they waited for me to sit down before Edna speaks to me again. “Ms Peterson, you are to remain in this domicile. You are not to contact anybody on the list we provided by any means including physical, verbal or through a non-approved third party. Do you understand what I have said to you?”
“Yes I have, but I didn’t batter her! I…” I try to explain, yet again, to the dolts!
“Held her hard enough to cause bruising. Battery. And there is also the assault on your husband. History. Good morning to you!”
End of flashback
I try Norman again, but again, he’s not picking up. I will not be dictated to by anybody, especially when I am in the right! In frustration, I try Effy. I hear the sound of her laughing as she picks up the phone and I wait for her to stop. “Effy, it’s Mom! Put your father on immediately!” I snap at her.
“Hello! Hello Lindsay, this is Gilda. I am hanging up now and calling the police on you. This is harassment!”
“Don’t you fucking dare, you old bat! Put Norman or Effy on right...hello! Hello!” I scream, but I am talking to nobody!
I have a pounding headache and decide to lie down and I had just gone to sleep when there is a hammering on the door.
“For fuck sake!” I snarl when I open it and it’s them again. “What the fuck do you want now?!”
“To arrest you for breach of restraining order and harassment! Get dressed!” Edna barks at me.
Oh, how I now hate that name with a passion!!
LIBERTY AVENUE HOTEL - SIX HOURS LATER
MICHAEL’S ROOM
MICHAEL
I can’t lie down, I can’t do anything apart from weep and even that stings! I don’t know how but I will get Albert back. I will...
Start of flashback
BATHROOM
MICHAEL
The water is just getting the perfect temperature and I open the bottle of shower gel and then remember it comes with a body scrub and pray that he missed that too. I am almost skipping back to the bathroom with the tub in my hands and grinning to myself because I had forgotten that I’d taken the body oil as well. So I now have a matching set for those special occasions. And scrubbing the prison off, then being in Carl’s company certainly warrants this use!
The bathroom is nice and steamy as I get naked and start to read the instructions. “Ah, it can be applied to wet or dry skin. Dry I think.” I take a massive scoop out and start to apply it to my skin then scrub hard. Getting really deep down, my body starts to tingle and grow hot. I look at the tube again. “Oh, a heating body scrub? Well it’s certainly doing that, a sure sign it is working!”
I carefully get into the tub and decide to do a face scrub and again, with the tingles. But I feel so much better. I grab the shower gel and get the loofah nice and soapy and wash off the scrub being very careful to avoid my junk. That’s the last thing I need to get warm!
My skin feels smooth and looks pink... actually, make that red and the tingles are still there. But when I step out into the bedroom, it cools down a little. I shrug and start to apply the oil and my body starts to warm up again. “This is pretty good stuff. Shame I didn’t take more of it.” I murmur and decide to apply some oil to my face.
“Ouch! Fucking hell!” I yell as some gets in my eye and really stings. I rush to the bathroom to rinse it out and it takes forever for it to cool down! I stagger back to the bedroom feeling hot, not warm… but hot! “Perhaps I shouldn’t have used all three products at once!” I sigh and lie down with the AC on and pull out the box fresh Captain Astro pants and snap them on wincing as the elastic makes contact with my heated skin. I am now sweating and feeling like I have had a very hot meal. I am actually burning up!
I need to rinse this shit off! I decide and head back to the bathroom and then pause and frown. “That doesn’t feel right. In fact, it feels like...ow! Fuck! Ow! Ow! Fuck me! Help! Ow!” I scream and drop to the floor, trying to pull my pants off. But because of the sweat, they are stuck to my skin and something is definitely stinging me! I bump my ass on the ground to squish whatever it is, but that doesn’t work. As I writhe on the ground, my back starts to burn more as it skids along the carpet. But fuck my back...my dick feels like a flamethrower and my asshole like a blowtorch!
I rip my pants off and then notice the lumps on my dick and in blind panic rush out of the room to find someone! Anyone to help me! I am in too much agony to pay any attention to shouts and keep running, but I am completely halted when I run smack into a wall because of the sweat, running into my eyes. As I bounce off the wall, I stagger to right myself and end up tripping over something, whacking my dick on the side of something else. I collapse on the floor, holding my dick to stop the pain...but had forgotten about the oil residue on my hands.
“Someone fucking help me; I am on fire! I am burning! Burning!” I scream before the pain becomes too much and I start to lose consciousness. The last thing I hear is, ‘See? This is why he needs to leave the Avenue! Dumb ass shit like this!’
End of flashback
I glare balefully at Ma as she watches Gilda, of all fucking people, apply the lotion all over. I am bright red from the bites and humiliation, and my eye is swollen.
“I have dialled Albert for you.” Carl says and puts it on speaker.
“Albert!” I yell as much as I can through swollen lips. “What did you do to my clothes?!”
“I didn’t do anything to your clothes. I just packed them, like I said. Why? What is the problem?”
“Some of your creatures got in and had a stinging party!” I snarl. “I was in the hospital for 3 hours!”
“Oh well, that is unfortunate. How ever do you think they got in there? It’s not as if there were holes put in the wall so that they could get out, now is there? Insects are apt to roam as I said, so maybe some roamed into your case…sorry, didn’t notice.” He pauses and starts to chuckle. “I did notice that you had purloined my cedar bathing set when I was packing for you. I hope you had a pleasant shower....”
“How do you use that self-heating shit?! I burned like fuck; my skin is sensitive, you know!”
“Which is why you shouldn’t have taken it. But since you did, I made sure that you had a shower you would never forget! Do you know what bhut jolokia is?”
“No and why the hell should I? Ouch! Be careful!” I growl to Gilda as she treads on my toe.
“So sorry, didn’t see your dactyl there.”
“You trod on my toe, not my dick!” I snark.
“A dactyl is a toe, Michael. Anyway, back to the bhut jolokia. It is commonly known as Ghost Pepper, so I thought I would add a little spice to your ablutions with a few...well, more than a few drops of the extract in each and every container.”
“Holy fuck!” Ma exclaims and starts to laugh harder than she was before.
“I do hope you didn’t use all three at once. It does warn you to use them separately.”
I just open and close my mouth in blind fury! “You weird ass fucker! But at least, unlike you, I have achieved an aim and got the Captain Astro figurine I have been after for years.”
“Oh, did you? Oh how very dull. How much did it cost, by the way?”
“More than you’ll ever have in your life!” I sneer and am about to nod to Carl to get him to hang up when Albert laughs. In fact, they are all laughing.
“What’s so funny?”
“Oh nothing, you wouldn’t get it.” Gilda starts to control herself.
“$22,928 plus taxes.” Albert suddenly says and Ma gasps.
“What?” I demand.
“You paid $22,928 plus taxes for the figurine and had to sell your non-precious collectibles in the swauption to do so.”
“Have you been spying on me?! Your life so dull that you have to live through mine?!” I scoff.
“No, but your $22,928 will go a long way at YEP and Soup and Drop. So it was a pleasure doing business with you.”
“Albert no, keep the…”
“No, Debs. Either you and Vic take it or they do. Pick one.”
“Give it to them, Albert. But honestly, there was no…”
“What are you babbling about, insect boy?”
“I sold the figurine to you. And I own the other five that you have alerts on.”
“But...but…”
“Yes, I kicked your butt with some bhut jolokia. Have a nice rest of life and by the way, whatever you do make sure you throw everything in that case away. You never know what else crawled in there.”
He hangs up laughing and when I look at them they are laughing too!
“I would like to be alone now.” I say quietly, but look up at Ma through my good eye.
“Bye, then.” She trills and I watch incredulously as they leave me, standing buck naked and alone.
NORMAN AND EFFY’S HOUSE - AN HOUR LATER
LOUNGE
DEBS
“So how the hell do we get him to the drive?” I snicker as their laughter abates.
“And then there’s Lindsay...” Gilda grouches.
“Lindsay is in county until her trial.” Carl advises. “Edna does not mess about and she’s pissed her off. As for Michael, well what about a simple approach? Tell him that Albert gave the money in his name and the Avenue want to honour him…”
“Would that work?” I frown and then hold up my hand. “Arrogance thy name is Michael; of course, it will work. So how do we do that in a way he will believe?”
“I’ll call the mayor.” Brian answers, taking a break from kissing Justin. I love how relaxed he is with him and us. “Turns out he’s not a fan, either!”
Brian’s duck dish:
http://www.olivemagazine.com/recipes/meat-and-poultry/duck-confit-hash-and-chilli-fried-eggs/
Breakfast tacos: http://www.olivemagazine.com/recipes/meat-and-poultry/breakfast-tacos/