Chapter 40 - I’ll Never Smile Again.

Two days later and Brian had had enough of ‘hanging out’ with Lindsey.

Brian and Lindsey had known each other ever since college and she was probably the only woman he considered a friend. She was intelligent and knowledgeable and could hold her own in just about any conversation. She was also very poised, something Brian valued in his line of business; he’d learned a lot from Lindsey over the years about the niceties of society manners and had put that information to work for him. She could be very caring and, generally speaking, was a good mother. Those were all admirable qualities in Brian’s book, and it explained why they’d been friends for this long.

But there was another, not so pleasant side, to Lindsey; one that had come out in the past few days and which was testing the limits of Brian’s friendship. Because sometimes Lindsey could be very self-centered. The part of Lindsey that made her so comfortable in every social situation also meant that she wasn’t very good at being on her own. She needed to be part of a group and she liked to be the center of attention, especially when she felt threatened or was in an unfamiliar environment. And Brian, who was essentially an introvert, often struggled with that aspect of his friend’s personality.

So, despite the fact that Lindsey had thoroughly enjoyed her time in Stratford and her theater weekend, she was jonesing for some social time and Brian seemed to be her victim of choice. Brian was willing to sit and listen to her stories about everything artsy she’d done that weekend, but only for so long. After a while it became pretty tedious. But what irked Brian more than anything, was the way Lindsey seemed almost jealous of her own son and the fact that Brian was so focused on the boy instead of her. So much so that, when she dismissed Gus with a ‘not now, Mommy and Daddy are talking, Lambskin’, when the child tried to join in on the conversation over lunch, Brian blew a fuse.

Holding a hand up to forestall Lindsey’s continued blathering, Brian fished his cell phone out of his pocket and called Cynthia. “Cyn, can you come down here to the restaurant - I’ve got a big favor to ask. Good. Thanks.”

When Cynthia arrived three minutes later, Brian requested that she take Gus to the office with her and let the boy play on the computer till he got there. Cynthia looked at Brian with concern and then turned to Lindsey with an appraising expression before she nodded understanding. The minute that Gus was out of hearing, Brian turned on his friend with a vengeance.

“Enough already, Lindz,” Brian stated flatly.

“What? I don’t understand . . .”

“Every single time Gus has brought up any of the stuff WE did over the weekend - particularly when it has to do with Justin - you’ve cut him off or hushed him. I’m tired of it, Lindsey. You’re a big girl and you do not need to be the center of attention at all times. What the hell is wrong with Gus telling you about what HE’S done, huh?”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Brian,” Lindsey replied, assuming a superior tone that Brian found even more insulting.

“You know, Lindz, jealousy does not become you,” Brian declared point blank.

“What a ridiculous thing to say. Who is it you think I’m jealous of, Brian?” Lindsey sniffed haughtily.

“Your son, for one. And Justin as well, it seems,” Brian set his napkin aside and pushed his chair back from the table, ready to dig into the discussion that he’d been putting off.

“What? Brian, that’s absurd. I’m not jealous of Gus OR your little blond boytoy. Why would you say such a thing?”

“Because you’ve been hogging the spotlight for the past two days and every time Gus brings up Justin’s name you’ve changed the subject,” Brian insisted, only to have Lindsey sputter and deny it again. “Listen to me, Lindz - are you listening?” Lindsey reluctantly nodded. “Get over yourself or you’re going to piss me off permanently.” Lindsey looked away, clearly not conceding, and Brian sighed before trying a different approach. “Look, Lindsey, I don’t mean to make you feel left out or anything, but you’ve got to understand that this thing with Justin is serious. He’s not my fucking ‘boytoy’. I care about him enough that I want to try and convince him to come back with me to Pittsburgh when I’m done here. And you acting all pissy about me and Gus spending time with him, isn’t going to change that. You saw how much the kid idolizes Justin; how close they’ve become in only a short time. The only thing you’re likely to accomplish by acting like a bitch all the time is to drive a wedge between you and me . . . and possibly Gus . . . I don’t want that, okay? I don’t want to have to choose between one of my oldest friends and the man I want to be with - please don’t force me to make that choice.”

“Oh, Brian,” Lindsey huffed a deep breath and stared at her plate for a long minute before replying. “Okay, I admit that I have been feeling a little left out. I guess I’d expected that this vacation would be just us - you and me and Gus - and I simply didn’t expect you, of all people, to have found a boyfriend who would horn in on our family time like this. This is all just so out of character for you, Bri. I don’t get what you see in him.”

That caused Brian to snort with unamused laughter. “Nothing. Other than the fact that he’s fucking hot. And smart. And strong and brave and so fucking loyal it’s insane.” Brian could see that Lindsey was already mentally dismissing all those qualities so he added the one that he knew would be the hook. “And he’s fucking good for me, Lindz. He cares about me and he calls me on my shit. He won’t let me get away with all the crap I’ve been spouting for so long that all my other friends now take it for granted. Not to mention that he’s fucking amazing with Gus. I’ve never seen the kid take to someone the way he bonded with Justin. The two of them were practically inseparable all weekend. Justin . . . he takes care of both of us, and that should be a good thing, right?”

“It’s just . . .”

“It’s just what, Lindz? Just fucking say it,” Brian demanded.

“You haven’t known him for very long, Brian. It’s only been a few weeks. And you seem like you’re ready to change your whole life for him . . . what do you really know about this guy?”

“Hold on, let me just get his FBI approved background check out for you,” Brian deadpanned; he was so ready for this conversation to be over.

“That’s not what I mean at all, Brian,” Lindsey sighed heavily, “and you know it.”

“Honestly? I have no idea what the fuck your problem is right now, Lindz. I’m happy and that should be all you care about.”

It was obvious from the way Lindsey was huffing and puffing that she was getting frustrated with the conversation. “It’s just that you’ve only known him for what, five or six weeks? And yet you had absolutely no reservations whatsoever about him being around your son? Not to mention that you seem to have changed your entire life philosophy about relationships in that short period of time. Isn’t this whole thing moving a little fast?”

“Hold on one fucking minute, Lindz . . . I would never put Gus’ safety in jeopardy. You know me better than that . . . or at least I thought you did.” Brian gulped down some water, if she wanted a fight, he was gonna give her one. “You know what, if we’re doing this, how about that frog, Gui? You let him stay with you when Gus was barely nine months old and you had just fucking met the guy. Did you do a full background check on him?”

“Brian . . .”

“No, Lindsey, I’m not done . . . You think Justin and I are moving too fast? You and Mel moved in together after what, three weeks? You’re not one to fucking judge how I live my life.”

Lindsey folded her hands nervously on her lap. “Are you finished?”

“Not even close,” Brian snapped. He was done with her hypocritical double standards.  

“I get it, okay? I’m a bad friend,” Lindsey looked down at her lap, her eyes seemingly unable to meet his.

Brian rubbed at his face, this wasn’t going the way he’d planned, but she wasn’t wrong. Sometimes she was a shitty friend. That really wasn’t the point though. This wasn’t about HER at all. That was why he was so pissed off. Lindsey was trying to make it about her when it should have been about Brian and what was best for Brian. Not to mention, what was best for Gus. Which, in both cases, as far as Brian was concerned, was Justin.

“I don’t want to fight with you, Lindz, but you’re not making this easy.”

Finally, Lindsey looked up. “And you’re really happy? With Justin I mean?”

“Fuck yes! I can’t explain it, Lindsey, but . . . I’ve never met anyone like him. I don’t know what it is . . . I know you and Mikey and probably everyone else I know back home are probably going to give me shit until my dying day for this, because I realize I HAVE been an ass about criticizing all your relationships, but I think I finally found someone I need in my life. Someone I can actually see myself with for a long fucking time. Maybe even forever. And, yeah, that’s fucking scary as hell, but . . . Look, the bottom line is that Justin’s just plain amazing and both Gus and I would be fucking lucky to have him in our lives. You too, if you’d let him in and not be a total bitch to him all the time.”

“Well,” Lindsey smiled guiltily, “I guess if he puts up with you and your bullshit, he must be pretty amazing.” Pushing her own chair away from the table she got up. “I’m sorry, Brian. I didn’t mean to start an argument over this. And I will TRY to be less of a bitch. I promise. Okay?”

“Don’t try, just do it, Lindz,” Brian replied, getting up from the table himself. “Now, tell Sonny Boy I’ll see him in the morning. I’m off to go find my blond boytoy. See you later, Lindz.”

Brian had been killing time in the White Lion for more than an hour before the blond mop of hair he’d been waiting for finally came through the pub’s front doors. Brian felt a stupid smile blossoming on his lips and a weight lifting off his shoulders. Damn that brat - the things he did to Brian without even trying.

While Justin was standing at the bar chatting with Daphne, Brian snuck up behind him, sliding an arm around the slender waist and leaning in to nip at a tender earlobe. “Do you know how annoying it is when I can’t find you. You need a telephone in that boarding house of yours, Blue Eyes,” he whispered.

“What are you doing here?” Justin asked, turning in Brian’s arms so he could look sternly at the man molesting him in a manner that definitely wasn’t 1941-approved. “I thought you were spending the day with Gus and Lindsey again.”

“Lindsey was pissing me off so I told her to fuck off and came to find you.”

“Oi, language mate! There’s a lady here, you know!” the guy sitting at the next barstool complained, using his pint glass to gesture towards a grinning Daphne.

Brian couldn’t be bothered and merely rolled his eyes, nodded his thanks to the barmaid when she handed over Justin’s drink, and then towed his blond over to the table where he’d been sitting for the past hour.

“Brian. Stop!” Justin insisted, prying his hand out of Brian’s and looking around him to make sure none of the other patrons were watching them too closely. “You’re forgetting yourself.”

“Shit.” Brian grimaced but didn’t try to argue the matter. “Whatever. So, did you miss me?”

Justin laughed at that question, shaking his head and finally loosening up a bit. “Yeah, I did,” he admitted. “It was a long two days.”

“Good. It seems that old adage about absence making the heart grow fonder isn’t all bunk, huh?” Brian teased, getting yet another smile out of his Blue Eyes, which pleased him to no end. “It must be working on Gus too; he’s been bugging the hell out of me and Lindz asking where His Jussin is. I told him I’d come get you and make you go with us tomorrow to the London Zoo. Does that sound like a plan you can get behind?”

“The zoo?” Justin set his drink aside and looked up at Brian with a searching expression. “Are you sure I shouldn’t stay away for the rest of his visit? I don’t want to make things worse by bonding with him even more . . .”

“Justin . . .” Brian felt like growling with frustration over the other man’s stubbornness. “Fine. This is as good a time as any to have this discussion, I suppose. So, let’s do it.” Brian looked around to check that no one was listening in and took a fortifying gulp of his own beer before he pushed the glass aside. “I don’t intend to just let you fucking die. Period. So, get whatever romantic notions you have about sacrificing yourself to the cause or nobly surrendering to your fate, or whatever other nonsense you’ve been telling yourself, out of your system. We need to figure this shit out and find a way to fix it.”

“We’ve been over this before, Brian,” Justin replied, obviously just as frustrated with Brian’s stubbornness. “I’m not being noble or romantic, just realistic. My fate is pretty clear and I don’t see how you or I can change history, so there’s nothing to figure out.”

“Well, there’s one way to change history, Justin,” Brian ventured, taking a deep breath before dropping the bombshell he’d been holding in reserve. “If you weren’t in 1941 at all, there’s no way you could be killed here.”

“What are you saying?”

“Just what it sounds like, twat.” Brian lowered his voice to just above a whisper, leaning across the table so only Justin could hear him. “You come back with me to 2016 and stay there. Forever.” Justin looked startled by that proposal. “Think about it, Justin. If you’re not around on the night of that bombing mission, you can’t possibly be killed. You’d be safe, with me, and that would be that.”

“I can’t just up and leave, Brian,” Justin looked around them as if only then seeing the world that surrounded them. “This is my home, Brian. I’ve got friends and family here. Not to mention a job - a career - and all the obligations that entails.” Justin looked into his beer, apparently finding something meaningful in the swirls of golden liquid. “I can’t just leave in the middle of a war. Especially a war that means so much.” He raised his gaze to meet Brian’s again. “That stuff I read about The Holocaust . . . you said we can never forget and we can never stop fighting to make sure that doesn’t happen again. Well, it’s happening right now, Brian. I can’t bear the thought of walking away now when those horrors are going on right this minute. Not when I can help fight it in my own time.”

Time to pull out all the stops. “Yeah, and what help will you be when you’re dead and your body is lying at the bottom of the ocean, huh, Blue Eyes?”

“Applesauce, Brian! That’s not fair.”

Brian sighed and reached out to lay his hand on top of Justin’s in a consoling gesture - fuck the strictures of puritanical 1941. “It may not have been fair, Justin, but it’s true. Just think about it, okay? We’ve still got a few weeks to figure it out. But please, Justin, don’t just throw your fucking life away. Don’t throw away what you and I have. I . . . I want you in my life, Justin. This thing between us . . . I . . . I can’t explain it, and when I try, I don’t give it the justice it deserves, but I know I don’t want to lose you. So, whatever it takes, I’ll do it as long as it means I can keep you safe.”

Justin smiled sadly. “I’ll think about it, okay?” he promised.

“And I’ll make sure you do, because I’m not giving up on this, Blue Eyes. I’m just not.” Justin gave him one of those ‘don’t push me’ looks he was so good at, which only made Brian smile because it made him realize that he knew the man’s ‘looks’ now. “So, you have to fly tonight?” Justin nodded. “Got time for a quick visit to my room beforehand?” Justin smiled and nodded again. “Good, because I find myself in need of your Experter services.”

Smiling, Justin put both their drinks down on the table and led the way.

Several hours later Brian groaned as Justin squirmed out from under his tired, sweaty body and started to roll off the bed. They’d managed to do a pretty good job on the reunion sex thing. He wasn’t sure how the hell Justin was going to sit in a plane for the next fuck-knows-how-many hours after the workout they’d just given the boy’s ass. But, since Justin wasn’t complaining, he obviously couldn’t be too upset about it.

“Golly. I didn’t realize it was so late. I’m going to have to make a leg or I’ll be late,” Justin grumbled as he used a towel to wipe the worst of the cum dribbles off his chest.

“Is it wrong that I’m proud you’ll smell like my cum all night long,” Brian asked, only realizing how ridiculously sentimental that sounded after the words had left his mouth.

“Yes, it is wrong. You are a very naughty boy, Handsome,” Justin laughed, bending down to kiss Brian one last time before he pulled on his pants and a shirt. “But, strangely enough, I kind of like the idea of smelling like you all night too.”

Brian picked up the towel and dabbed at his own sticky body but didn’t bother putting on any clothing. He wanted Justin to have to think about what he’d left behind that night - which was also what he’d be leaving behind if he didn’t at least try to fight his fate. Brian wasn’t above using every trick he could think of to convince his Blue Eyes to come away with him to the future. At the very least, he figured the pull of his naked body couldn’t hurt.

“Be safe tonight,” Brian ordered as he stepped in between Justin and the door. “And get your ass back here first thing in the morning so we can pick this up where we left off.”

“Roger that,” Justin agreed, before adding, “and you don’t have to say it - I already know you’d rather roger me again.”

They kissed one more time. It was a long, slow, passion-filled kiss with a lot of tongue involved. It was a very good kiss. But then Justin tore himself away, gave Brian’s cock a friendly little tug in dismissal and pushed his way around Brian to the door, leaving Brian cursing under his breath at the prospect of another night of his bed being empty.

There had been another, albeit much smaller, air raid that night, so Brian hadn’t gotten much sleep and was feeling a bit groggy when the All Clear was sounded and he finally made it back upstairs from the hotel’s shelter to his bed. Strangely enough, though, he couldn’t get to sleep. Instead, he spent the time thinking through and revising his personal life plan.

See, Brian Kinney had had a plan for how his entire life would go from the time he was about fifteen. That was when he’d decided that he was going to escape from his parents’ mediocre, hum-drum, blue-collar life, no matter what he had to do. For the most part, that plan had worked out pretty well, too. He’d buckled down and got good enough grades in high school to score a college scholarship. With the education he obtained, he’d landed a good job in advertising and within only a few years had squirreled away enough to buy himself a beautiful loft apartment. Then he’d diligently worked his way up through the ranks at work till he’d reached the point he was at today, the acknowledged top earner at VanGuard. At the same time, he’d purposely avoided any and all distractions or entanglements that might keep him from his end goal, which was to one day own his own agency and thereby become so fabulously wealthy that he’d never again have to worry about money or job security. The only glitch in his plan up until recently had been the arrival of Gus, who Brian had loved from the first moment he laid eyes on the infant, but that particular entanglement had only made him want to reach his financial goals more, so that he could ensure Gus would always be provided for. Brian hadn’t let anything else get in the way of his plan.

Until now.

Because Justin Taylor certainly qualified as a distracting entanglement. And it wasn’t clear how this anomaly fit into the Kinney Life Plan. But Brian had already admitted - aloud and to more than one person - that he wanted Justin in his life. Now he just had to figure out how that would work. Assuming, of course, that they managed to avoid that historically documented run in with the Grim Reaper.

What Justin had said when Brian had asked him to come to the future with him, about not wanting to leave his friends, family and job, had really struck home. Brian had simply presumed that Justin would WANT to come to the future, but now it seemed like Brian might have jumped the gun. It made him stop and think about it more clearly. Was it reasonable of Brian to ask the other man to simply up and leave his life here? How could he ask that of Justin? Would Brian be willing to do the same for Justin?

As interesting as it was to come back to 1941 and see it with his own eyes, Brian didn’t think he could live here permanently. It wasn’t only the fact that there was a war going on in this time, making life in this era inherently dangerous. Brian just didn’t fit in here. The whole point of coming back here would be so that he could be with Justin, but how was that supposed to work when homosexuality was still illegal here. Even assuming they could work out a way to be together despite the laws, he couldn’t see himself going back in the closet again. He couldn’t live his life like that permanently. And that’s even assuming he could bear to be separated from his son, which he couldn’t. No, there was no way Brian would be able to give up his job and family to come back here to live in this repressive time, even for Justin.

So, was it fair to ask Justin to do the same? Justin didn’t have the same kind of family ties Brian had. Yes, he had a mother and a younger sister still alive here, but the war and Justin’s desire to become a pilot had already effectively separated them. And Justin didn’t have a child he’d be leaving behind if he left this time. It might be difficult for Justin to leave his friends here in 1941, but would he do it to gain the relative freedom he could have in 2016? If Justin came with Brian to the future, they could be together, openly, in a way they could never have here in the past. They could live together. They could spend more time together with Gus. They wouldn’t have to hide or lie about themselves. It seemed, to Brian at least, the only real solution to their situation.

So, what would it take to get Justin to accept his solution? Justin still seemed a little overwhelmed by everything he was seeing in the future but, all things considered, Brian thought he was adapting pretty fucking well. He already knew that the lure of Gus was a strong point in his favor. What else could he offer to make the prospect more appealing? Justin would undoubtedly make new friends wherever he ended up; that was just the way his Blue Eyes was, naturally friendly. He’d have Brian and Gus as his new family. He’d have the ability to live out and be proud of his sexuality. What else was there?

Flying.

Justin’s job here in 1941 seemed to be the one factor that Brian couldn’t easily counter. He knew how passionate Justin was about becoming a pilot. But was that because Justin loved flying itself or because it was the best career option he had in this time period? Brian already knew that Justin could easily make a living as a graphic artist if he came to 2016 - his assistance with Brian’s clients had been invaluable. He’d hire the kid in a nanosecond. In point of fact, having Justin’s talent backing him might even help Brian attain the rest of his goals, like the part about owning his own agency, a lot earlier. And there was no reason why Justin couldn’t eventually get his pilot’s license in 2016 too, right? Basically, if Justin came with Brian, he could have whatever career he wanted, and Brian would be happy to help him get it.

Of course, that thought brought up another issue; the logistics of making this all happen. Because it was one thing for Brian to go back in time and use modern technology to jury-rig a fake ID and counterfeit some money so that he could make his way around 1941 London, provided he didn’t do anything to bring himself to the notice of anyone who’d care, but it would be another thing altogether to bring Justin to 2016 and somehow get him the documentation he’d need to do anything there. Justin would need ID - preferably a Passport so they could eventually go back to the States when Brian’s work with Britcom came to an end - and he’d need credentials of some kind if he wanted a modern pilot’s license. Brian had no fucking idea how to get that shit.

Which meant that Brian was going to have to ask for help and the only person he knew that would likely have the contacts he’d need for this kind of thing was his loyal and freakishly sneaky assistant, Cynthia. The woman sometimes knew far too much for her own good and Brian often teased her about running her own private investigation agency from her desk. She’d know just what needed to be done to set Justin up in 2016. But there was no way Cynthia was going to help him without a better explanation than he’d given her when she worked her magic on his ID and the 1941 money. The idea of telling Cynthia his secret, though, made Brian cringe. She was going to think he was fucking insane. He’d be lucky if she didn’t have him committed before he’d even finished asking for her help. Maybe he should just show her - take her with him to Duckett’s Passage and show her the portal - before explaining. At least then she couldn’t accuse him of being crazy. He wasn’t sure about letting another person in on the secret, but since he didn’t have any better ideas, Cynthia would have to be added to their little cabal.

Once Cyn was on board, though, Brian was sure she’d be able to help him convince Justin that he WANTED to stay in 2016. Cynthia could be amazingly fucking convincing when she wanted to be. And he knew he was going to need all the help he could get to talk his pig-headed blond into this new and amazing plan. The Kinney Life Plan 2.0.

Now, where was the blond in question anyway?

No sooner had Brian asked himself that question than there was a quiet knock on the door and a uniform-bedecked Justin slipped into the room. Damn the kid looked good in that fucking uniform. Even when he was tired and rumpled and smelled of sweat and engine oil from his plane. Brian felt his cock taking an instant interest. It was stupid that Brian found the odor of engine oil so fucking hot, but he couldn’t argue with his cock, not when the little guy always had such great taste.

So, before Justin could even say hello, Brian had jumped up, tackled the unprepared pilot to the mattress and within a matter of minutes was fucking the shit out of the boy who hadn’t even been allowed to take his uniform off.

When Brian finally collapsed over Justin’s back, his heart beating so hard from the fast-paced fuck that he could feel it in his fingertips, Justin was laughing hard enough to jiggle the whole bed. Brian would have given him shit for laughing at such an inopportune moment if he wasn’t still panting too hard to speak. Brian had never put up with any other guy laughing at him after he fucked them, but, well, this was Justin and Justin got away with pretty much anything he wanted. Besides, Brian was too tired right then to move.

“It’s nice to see you too, Handsome.” Justin commented, bending one leg so that he could kick back and knock against Brian’s calf with the boot he was still wearing on that foot. “You didn’t even let me grab a shower, I must stink.”

“Mmmm, and that’s WHY I didn’t let you grab a shower.”

“Well, it’s nice to know I was missed,” Justin chuckled again, as he tried to push Brian off him so he could free himself.

Brian, however, was resisting as he was plenty comfortable right where he was on top of his Justin mattress. “Did you miss me too, Blue Eyes?” he asked as cheekily as he could manage.

“Did I miss you?” Justin asked as he snuggled into Brian some more. “No. Not a bit.” Before Brian could get completely offended, though, the brat laughed and amended his answer by adding, “I felt you inside me all night; it was like you were right there with me.”

That was all Brian had wanted to hear - hell, if he had it his way,  Justin would always feel him inside of him. The more Justin wanted Brian, the more likely he was to listen to Brian’s cunning Time Relocation Plan. And, just to reinforce the other hook he had that Brian knew would help persuade Justin to adopt his plan, it was time to bring in Gus as well.

“How about we head back to 2016 and take advantage of the really amazing shower I have back there so we can get cleaned up together, before we pick up Sonny Boy for his trip to the zoo? He’s apparently really looking forward to seeing the penguins with you.”

“Mmmm, now that sounds like a plan I can get behind,” Justin moaned happily.

“As long as that’s all you plan to get behind, Blue Eyes. I can’t be hobbling around the zoo all day, trying to keep up with Gus and unable to sit . . .” Brian gave a little wink.

“As delightful as that sounds, I’m far too tired for any of that, Handsome. So, I’m afraid, it looks like you’ll be doing all the hard work for us in the shower this morning,” Justin giggled as he spoke.

“No problem, Blue Eyes, that’s the kind of hard work I excel at,” Brian assured him as he finally rolled off the younger man and let Justin pull his clothing back into place.

After that they made quick work of dressing and headed out, laughing and teasing each other the whole time. Outside, though, they were immediately confronted by the destruction resulting from the prior night’s raid, and their laughter quickly faded. Although the raid had been relatively small in comparison to the last few that had rained down heavily on Central London, there was still a significant amount of rubble strewn about. Luckily, the short walk to Duckett’s Passage was nowhere near as bad as Brian had expected, with the exception of a short detour around a still-smoldering building on the block before their destination.

As the alleyway came into sight, though, something in Brian’s stomach dropped. He wasn’t sure why as everything looked exactly the same; maybe it was the smell of burning plaster that seemed to be wafting from that direction? But whatever it was, it made Brian break into a run for the last few meters.  

Jogging after him, Justin reached out and grabbed Brian’s arm, trying to hold him back. “Brian, slow down.”

“Let go, Justin,” Brian yanked his arm away and continued, without reducing his pace until he reached the entrance to Duckett’ Passage. At first everything looked normal, and for a moment Brian breathed a heavy sigh of relief. It wasn’t until he’d walked the last few feet and turned the corner that he saw what had been causing that nasty smell in the air.

The building directly to the north of the alley had collapsed and the entire rest of Passage was covered in quietly smoldering debris.

Scanning the wall to the left, Brian could see whole sections that had crumbled. The rest of the brickwork was impossible to see as it was being blocked by falling ash and rubble. The heat radiating from the smoking wreckage was enough to stop both men in their tracks.

Brian began trying to shift some of the fallen bricks nearest the entrance. “No, no, no, no,” he repeated in a near panic.

“Wowsers! This is a mess,” Justin commented as he kicked aside a pile of wooden lathes with clumps of plaster still attached.  

“A mess? This is a fucking disaster!” Brian responded angrily.

“It’s okay, Brian. It’s not that bad. I’m sure the fire crews will get here eventually. It doesn’t look like there’s danger of it spreading though.” Justin’s calming presence should have been soothing, but it only irritated Brian further.

“You don’t fucking understand, Justin. I need to get back; Gus is waiting for me. We’re going to the zoo today. I can’t . . . I can’t stay here. I’m never late, he’ll be wondering where I am. I need to get home. ”

Justin tried to hold him back, saying something in a reasonable tone, but Brian wasn’t listening. All he could think about was that he had to get back to Gus. It didn’t matter how. NOT getting back wasn’t a viable option.

Brian kicked aside a wooden beam that was still crackling with small flames licking down the back side. There was a pile of bricks and larger masonry just behind it, which he tried to climb over. One of the larger blocks toppled over just as he reached it, knocking against his leg as it fell, but he didn’t even register the pain that should have caused him. He scrambled through still smoldering bits of wood and other debris, ignoring the small burns he was getting as he tried to clear a path. When he finally broke through to a clearer spot, Brian slid his hands frantically along the intact sections of the wall, trying to find the rift that would let him go home.

“I can’t find it, I can’t fucking find it,” Brian could hear the panic in his own voice as his hands pushed against solid brick. “It’s gone, Justin. It’s fucking GONE!”

Brian slapped at the wall, feeling along the bricks, but the familiar experience of his hands slowly disappearing from sight didn’t happen. He couldn’t find the time portal. It simply wasn’t there any more.

Brian turned to face Justin, who was standing only a foot or two behind him, looking almost as worried. “What . . . What if the time portal was damaged in the raid? What if . . . What if it’s gone and I’m trapped here . . . Forever,” Brian moaned, dropping to his knees in defeat.