HOLY BITCH SLAP MIKEY!

57TH PRECINCT - LATE AFTERNOON

DESK SERGEANT PHIPPS

She strolls in with a smug smile playing around her lips, not quite the distressed countenance I expected from someone whose son is in jail. “I’ve come to collect my son, Michael…”

“I know who he is.” I cut her off and snatch up the phone and speak into it for a couple of minutes. “The fine needs to be paid first, then he can be released.”

“How much is it?”

“$10,000 plus fees.”

“I don’t have that much money, but he does, so if he wants out then he would need to pay it.” He relays that message and I bet she can hear his whine from her side of the desk. An hour later he is making his way moodily towards us.

“What happened?” She demands as they head out of the door.

DEBS

“Where were you?!” He snaps.

“I went for a walk. What happened? Why were you arrested?”

“Because Uncle Vic was at that bitch’s house and when I got home she most probably called the cops on me!” He scowls as he tries to hail a cab, it takes 20 minutes for one to stop for us. He gets in first and then stops me from following. “For not being there you can get your own fucking cab, I don’t want to be around you right now!” He snaps and slams the door in my face. I have to wait another 20 minutes for a cab and when I get home. I can hear him in his room.

“I want to watch my movies, so go upstairs to your room and knit or something!”

“Michael, how is any of this my fault?” I reason and try not to smile.

“It isn’t I suppose.” He grudgingly concedes. “But you could’ve got there quicker!”

“I couldn’t have got there quicker. I left my phone here and it wasn’t until I had been gone a while that I realised. As soon as I got your message I headed straight to the station. But since we are still pariahs, cabs don’t want to stop for us. As you saw for yourself earlier!”

“Fair enough. I still want to watch my movies down here, and I am still fucked off with you. So go for another walk and take your phone with you this time!”

“Yes, Michael. I will be about an hour.”

“Make it at least two!” He snaps and jabs the remote to turn the TV on.

“Yes, Michael. I shall leave you to your quiet time.”

“Oh, and another thing, don’t tidy my room until I tell you to! That was a gross invasion of my privacy!”

“Yes, Michael.” I simper and of course he doesn’t notice!

MRS KINNEY’S HOUSE - FRIDAY AFTERNOON

HALLWAY

JOAN

“What is this nonsense?!” I demand, and then glare at Claire as she wafts her hand in front of her face.

“You need a breath mint, Mrs Kinney! As for that…” She points at the paper in my hand. “...it is not nonsense. It is a court document detailing the charges of historical child abuse and wilful neglect by you against one Brian Aiden Kinney.”

“I did not abuse or neglect that boy! I…”

“Paid Miss Grassi to not go to child services, yes we know.” She goes pale. “So these papers are ordering you to attend court in two weeks’ time. If you don’t, then a police officer will come and get you from wherever you are, and your drunken ass will be thrown in jail until such time as your trial starts.”

“This travesty will…”

“Show the world how you truly are!” She snaps and opens the front door before she turns to look me up and down in contempt. “I would start praying if I were you.”

DEBS AND MICHAEL’S HOUSE - SAME TIME

BRIAN

I have to do this. It has to be me alone. Well, almost me alone.  I smile as Mami makes her way across the road and Pearl walks down to join us. The word has hit the Avenue that the worm turned and she’s been basically his lackey in all but name. I watch her stare out of the window in surprise, when he joins her, he grins and waves.

“Fucking idiot!” Pearl mutters as we walk up the path, part of me flinches as he shoves her to go and let me in. But she birthed that dog, so she gets the fleas from lying with it!

“Brian!” She cries, and then frowns. “Excuse me, can I help you two?”

“Yes. Be polite and I won’t fry your ass.” Mami declares and pushes past her.

“What the hell are you doing in our…” Michael begins.

“Let’s get this over with!” Pearl orders, then gestures I should go ahead of her and without looking at Debs, we head into the lounge. “Can’t wait for you two to fuck off out of our street. Such undesirables.”

“Get out of our house! This is nothing to do with you two old hags!” Michael snipes before he folds his arms and glares at them.

“Not going anywhere.” Mami retorts and sits down. “Brian continue.”

“Brian, since when do you allow these people to boss you about…”

“Instead of you doing it you mean?” I ask quietly and pull out the envelopes. “Here, there's one for each of you.”

“What’s this?” Debs asks and begins to open hers, but he just puts his on the table.

“Read it and weep, real tears this time.” I tell her, as she looks taken aback by the contents.

“What is it? What does yours say?” Michael demands.

“Exactly what yours says, except it has your names on it.” I reply.

“Mother, for fuck sake, just tell me what it says!” He bellows at her but she just turns to me.

“Brian, you can’t be serious? I know I did wrong by encouraging him with the idea in the first place, but I stopped. I didn’t cause any future abuse...none!”

“But you didn’t stop it either. What did you spend it on as a matter of interest?”

“What?” She looks confused and now he has opened his, he sits down heavily looking at the document then at me.

“The money that she gave you not to go to child services. What did you buy?”

“Mother how could you?!” Michael exclaims standing up and attempting to get to my side, but Pearl gets between us.

“Hers was one off payment. But you did your worst for 4 years.”

“I didn’t!” He objects and then turns his puppy eyes on me. “Brian, I never expected him to do what…”

“But it’s been so long now. Why take us to court, we never did, well I never did anything. What he did with the information…” Debs begins as tears flow down her face. “...what does it possibly benefit anybody having this dragged through the court? Think of how it will look...”

“It will look like I survived in spite of, not because of you three.” I am amazed at how calm I am.

“Three? You mean Lindsay is being charged as well?” Debs almost smiles.

“No, not Lindsay. Mrs Kinney is charged with you.”

“What?!” Michael gasps.

“And I don’t think she will have a single problem dropping you in it!” My laugh is hollow. “She won’t want to be burned in the devil’s eternal fire, although she could join my old man there, you know what they say about misery loving company.”

“Brian!” Debs cries out again and reaches for me, but Michael slaps her hand away.

“Don’t touch him! You have no right to touch him after what you did!”

“I’ve read them. Every single word you wrote, what you both wrote and Justin is right about you Michael. It was plain old fashioned jealousy and petulance. I wouldn't be what you wanted me to be, and you couldn’t be me, so you tried to drag me down to your level.” I just shake my head at him. “You told him about my scholarship for college, for which I have to grudgingly say, thank you.”

“Thank you!” Mami gasps. “What for?!”

“If he hadn’t told him, he wouldn’t have been so angry about me not sticking around to earn my keep. And I wouldn’t have fought back and left.” His face twists in annoyance. “I notice you don’t deny that you told him.”

“Brian…” Debs beseeches. “...this is completely unnecessary and…”

“Tell someone who wants to save your asses.” I shoot back. “Ladies, we’re done here. Let’s go.”

MICHAEL

As the door shuts, I turn to Mother and glare at her. “So you had a book too, did you? And you took money instead of going to the authorities?” I stand right in front of her. “You sicken me!”

“I sicken you?!” She barks out, standing up and causing me to step back. “This shit of yours stops right now!”

“Like I said before, I am in charge!” I yell at her. “You took money to keep quiet. And…”

“You are on dangerous ground, Michael!”  

I shove her back as hard as I can into the chair. “And I shall tell all of Liberty Avenue, what kind of mother you really are!” I pick up my jacket and storm to the door before I turn to stare at her sprawled where she fell, seemingly in shock. As I head for a cab, I scowl at the hag on my way down the street.

DEBS

That little punk put his hands on me! I stand up and dust myself down. Nobody puts their hands on me! I pick up the court papers again and read mine and then his. We are both going to be charged with contributing to the abuse of a minor, child endangerment, failure to report a crime. He’s going to try and make me look worse than him in this, is he? True, I shouldn’t have taken the money, but like I said, if he hadn’t run his mouth. All that is in the past, except as usual he’s being an asshole, and not leaving it there! Then I remember something. I pull out my phone and send a text. He might not respond to it, but it will get back to them, and then the shit will hit the fan for him.

BOTTOM TREMONT AVENUE - AN HOUR LATER

EMMETT

Jesus, what a fucking day! I have been rushed off my feet, so all I want to do is soak it away. As I head up to my truck, under Brian’s loft, I see excrement slither out of a cab and seemingly smile in my direction. I walk quicker, if I can just get to the sanctuary of my truck then I will be fine!

“Emmett! Emmett! Wait! I need to talk to you about the so called Mother of Liberty Avenue!” He puffs and breaks into a trot as I lengthen my stride. “She took money from Brian’s boozed up mother not to report the abuse!” I stop and stare at him, feeling more sickened than I thought possible. He takes my silence as encouragement. “Isn’t that fucking disgraceful?! What kind of mother does that to her son?!”

“But she didn't do it to her son, she did it to Brian!” I tighten my grip on my bag, so I have something to do with my hands other than wrap them around his throat.

“She was his mother in all but name, and she did that!” He presses.

“And you were his best friend and chief leghumper, and you did that for 4 years!”

“It’s not the same! She took money to keep quiet!” He objects.

“Yet you did it for free!” I step towards him and, for once, his teeny brain has a sensible reaction and he backs off. “You went to his father, at his place of work once, knowing what would most likely happen! So don’t you play the anguished best friend with me! Are you seriously trying to say that the Mother of Liberty Avenue comes into some money and you didn’t reap the benefit of it?!”

“I most likely didn’t know where it came from?!” He retorts.

“As long as it is not your money you don’t care where it comes from! As long as it is spent on you or those infernal toys! As long as you get what you want, you don’t care!”

“Hey, Emmett, you okay? Want some help?” Granger’s voice booms across the street he starts to advance, when he sees who it is. “Get away from him, you ugly dumbfuck!”

“Granger, it’s fine, honestly. He was just doing his usual pathetic thing of trying to shift blame…”

“I would feel better if I walked you to your truck though. He’s a coward and a weasel.”

“That’s very kind of you, but…”

“Honeycutt!” Brian bellows as he leans out of the window of his loft, I have no idea how long he has been there. “Let Granger walk you to your truck! Actually, can you come up to the 2nd floor first? There is a Tigger in need of your epicurean assistance!”

“For Ti...I never said it! Now stop glaring and I will be right there!” I turn to Granger and give him a kiss on the cheek. “I think I will be fine from this point onwards, but if ever I am in need of a knight in shining spandex then I will give you a call.”

“Any time.” He grins at me and returns the kiss on my cheek. “But I would still feel better if I at least walked you the 10 yards to the....” He looks over my shoulder and sighs as the excrement, which was still floating by my side is now running towards the building. “Oh what the fuck is he doing now?!”

“Brian! What’s this about the 2nd?! He shouts as he runs up but Brian closes the window and then out of the building comes Riley. “What the fuck are you doing here?!” We rush up just in time to catch that horrid smirk he does. “The great love affair all over with and he’s back to you. You should be honoured to get a repeat.”

“You and I share one thing in common. I haven’t been fucked by Brian, but that’s because, one, I’m straight, and two, unlike you, Fusspots…”

“Fusspots? Is that the best you can do, you…”

“What? What is it that you are going to call me that isn’t going to get you knocked on your ass?” He says nothing. “But, just so everyone can spread it around the Avenue, he’s Fusspots...and that means fuck ugly shit stain piece of turd spit.”

“I really hope he doesn’t want help with a chocolate mousse.” I snicker and push pass an embarrassed Fusspots and close the door on Granger taking out his phone, no doubt calling the denizens of the Avenue...oh that name will be around in seconds!

2ND FLOOR LOFT

The door is open when I get there, and I find a perplexed looking Justin and an amused looking Brian in the kitchen. In fact, as well as amused, he looks very relaxed indeed. “What’s occurring that my expertise is called for?” I look in the bowl and can smell that something is wrong. “What is that supposed to be?”

“Tuna steaks in a sweet chilli glaze, which I am supposed to blacken.” Justin replies and grimaces. “The recipe said to marinade up to 3 days but it’s turned the steaks grey.”

“Made it before?” I ask as I hip him out of the way and he shakes his head. I taste it and spit it straight out. “How much salt did you put in that?!”

“What it says on the recipe, 11 tbsp of fish sauce.”

“It can’t say that! Nobody puts 11 tbsp of fish sauce in anything!” Brian snickers and earns a fiery Tigger...I can say it when he can’t hear me...glare.

“Look, it says right here!” He picks up the recipe card and shows it to me. I peer at it then lick my finger to wipe off the mark next to the one. “One tablespoon!” He exclaims going bright red as Brian guffaws with laughter. “It’s not funny! Dinner is ruined now!”

“It’s not ruined Tigger. Okay it is, but it is funny. Come on, why don’t we order in and we can celebrate that way? Lobster instead of prawns and…”

“But I wanted to cook it.” He sighs. “It’s a big day for us and…”

“Big day? Why?” I ask.

“We served papers on the three of them for what they did, we’re reopening the store and...”

“Three of them?”

“Miss Grassi, Mr DeVore and Mrs Kinney.” Brian explains and I reach for a stool and Justin has to help. “Are you breathing Honeycutt?!” He waves Justin to the cart and I gratefully accept the brandy.

“Don’t call me Honeycutt.” I whisper. “Look, I need to tell you something that he said about her…”

“The money Mrs Kinney paid her not to go to child services? Yeah, I know about that. That’s why, amongst other reasons, I decided to go through with it.”

“You’ve done it. I am so proud.” I smile at them.

“Yeah.” He gives a small smile.

“The store, you said you were reopening it? What for?” I frown.

“As a counselling service.”

“That is a brilliant idea. I take it that was yours Triple B?” He shrugs. “So that’s two, what’s the third?”

“Huh?” Brian says and now he’s blushing.

I look between the two of them and catch the loving look. “I will be right back!” I declare as I head to the window, I shake my head as not only is Fusspots still outside but so is Granger. I turn back to them and smile. “Yes, duck empanadas, and methinks Strawberry Granita with vodka. I have some in my store. 20 minutes! Actually, let me see if Darren is still there!” I reach for my phone and pause. “What the fuck is she texting me for?!”

“Who?”

“The creature!” I snap, and they come to read over my shoulder. “Why am I asking Vic about the hotel?”

“I don’t know, but just…” Justin frowns and Brian heads for his phone.

We sit in silence as he speaks to his Dad. After he hangs up, he rakes his hand through his hair.

“What? What is it?” I fret.

“Dad recorded them saying that they wanted to destroy me by rumour mongering. One of the ones they came up with was that I had syphilis, and spread it around.”

“Oh, landsakes! Even at your most rampant you were clean and careful!” I explode. “That’s it, eyeball ripping time, which one of them do you want me to do first?!”

“Down, Cujo. And it was not them, well not entirely. Him. He wanted to do that, but her self-preservation kicked in. Vic is sending the recording to Arthur.”

“Please, Brian, let me handle this!” I snarl and grab my things. You guys order in, I will bring the empanadas and granita another time. I believe I have a few choice words that will make it go away!”

“Keep it legal.” He tells me with a smirk.

“Oh, you should know by now that I am all about being legal and above bitchy board!” He raises his eyebrows, I have to admit that my malicious tone surprises me, but sometimes it calls for the big bazookas!

DEBS AND MICHAEL’S HOUSE - THREE HOURS LATER

LOUNGE

DEBS

He looks traumatised and well he might. The moment he came through the door I slapped him, and slapped him so hard that he fell to the ground. “The next time you lay your hands on me, it will be the last time!” I shout right in his face uncaring as he wipes the spittle off. “Get up and get in there!”

He scrambles to his feet but tries to go to his room instead, so I grab his arm and drag him back into the lounge. “Let go of me or I shall have you fucking arrested!”

“For what exactly?!” I scoff.

“You hit me!” He yells.

“You pushed me earlier!” As usual he goes to his default puppy dog eyes and crying. “Oh, what’s the matter, honey, reality hit has it?!”

“They are going to do it raw!” He chokes out. “Emmett took great pleasure in telling me that in a month from now he will be condom free!”

“Who are? Oh, you mean Brian and Justin? Of course they will be. He is everything that you are not, nor will you ever be.”

“Ma! You’re supposed to be on my side!” He wails.

“There is only one side, Michael, and that’s mine! So here’s what is going to happen and remain happening. You do as I say, when I say, how I say and with a big ole happy smile on that fugly mug of yours, capice!”

“And if I don’t?” He mutters.

“It will be me who presses charges for assault. Because, unlike my little tap, your brutal shove was recorded for posterity! I knew that nosy old hag Pearl would come in handy for something!” He freezes in his chair then looks at me carefully. “So I am back as Queen of the Hill and, because of your actions, the shit flows downhill to you. But this time there’s no pathetic but heroic Brian to get between you and it!”