February 23
"Is there a point to this?" Justin pointedly asked, not caring in the least if his words and tone came off as rude, even if went against his nature to do so.
His mother had raised him to be a proper WASP after all; but there just came a point in time where the kid gloves needed to come off, and this was definitely one of those times. Lindsay had been waxing poetic all afternoon about the 'spiritual and life-enhancing miracle that was birth,' specifically, and in general, sharing way too much fucking information about her own experience with Gus.
What was it about carriers who felt the need to share their own birth experience in as excruciating detail as possible to other parents-to-be? It amazed Justin that there were as many people on the planet today given this propensity to over share. God knows that if he'd talked to Lindsay before deciding to have a kid, in all likelihood, it wouldn't have happened by the time she was done. Because, really, it sounded more like the climax of a horror movie than the 'spiritual and life-enhancing miracle' she claimed it to be.
Taking a sip of his water, Justin watched as Lindsay scrunched up her face in displeasure, giving off the appearance that she'd smelled something foul; a look that was becoming more and more familiar the deeper Justin got into his pregnancy. But really, had she not learned the last time she'd tried to steer him in a direction in line with her own way of thinking? Just because he hadn't seen the manipulation that the whole Art Forum article had been at the time - you know, back when he'd barely been an adult - didn't mean that he'd be so easily led around by the nose again.
Smiling blandly at their audience, who were deriving far too much enjoyment out of Lindsay's and his sparring, Justin waited for whatever new nugget of Zen-like truth she was about to spout on squeezing something the size of small watermelon out of something that soooo wasn't. Because he hadn't drank the Kool-Aid; and he wasn't interested in buying any bridges either; so he had no idea why she'd thought that he'd fall for any of her nonsense now.
"I'm just saying that giving birth is a natural and beautiful thing," Lindsay huffed, sitting up in her chair primly, acting as if she were royalty, ruling over her underlings. Justin barely quelled the urge to roll his eyes as she turned his mother, a simpering smile on her face. If she only knew what his mom really thought of her and her airs. "Surely, you'll agree with me, Jen."
Justin snickered as his mother turned to her with a bland smile, looking every inch the old money she was; only he could see just how annoyed she was to be dragged into this petty battle of wills. To the rest of the room, it looked as if butter wouldn't melt in her mouth. Well, Brian would have been able tell if he hadn't been too busy discussing the baby growth project with Gus and Jenny; he'd been around her enough to see it too.
"Oh, honey; don't get me involved with this," his mother said with a mild smile that was just a little too plastic around the edges; and then it turned genuine as she looked at him. "Besides Justin was stubborn from the very beginning and took nearly eighteen hours to make an appearance; and then when he did burst onto the scene, he screamed the place down. I didn't find anything magical about that." Justin rolled his eyes, as he'd heard that story every time she was irritated with him. "I should have known even then that you were going to be a drama queen."
Everyone in the vicinity laughed outside Lindsay, who was wearing a smile that was a little to plastic to be genuine – it was a little too wide and a little too tight; sort of like one would expect from stretching a rubber band. Seriously, what the hell was her problem? It had been funny, even if it had been at his expense. It's okay to laugh.
"Thanks a lot, Mom," Justin huffed; not that he didn't agree with her, but did she have to announce it to the world?
"Anytime, sweetheart," his mother said, the faintest hint of a smirk on her lips. Justin rolled his eyes again as she leaned over and patted him on the cheek. "Just remember – what goes around, comes around."
"I'm sure Sunbeam will be an angel," Justin said in a haughty tone; and mock scowled when his mother snorted in utter disbelief.
"Yeah, I said that too," his mother said, an indulgent look on her face, her tone as dry as the Sahara. "And look at what I got stuck with."
Justin just rolled his eyes again, something he was doing a lot of that day, and jabbed Brian in the ribs with his elbow when he snickered. He yelped and glared at Justin, and then pinched him on the ass, frowning when Justin barely reacted. Justin just smirked; that's what happened when your husband had an obsession with your ass. You sort of grew immune to the constant abuse.
"I did it," Lindsay stated primly, drawing all eyes back to her; obviously she wasn't happy that she'd lost her audience. Everyone looked at her in bewilderment, having since moved on from the prior nauseating topic. So, of course, she clarified just in case everyone hadn't wanted the conversation to end about twenty minutes ago. You know, when she first brought it up. "Natural birth; it was a wonderful experience."
Justin noted the grimaces around him and decided to nip this in the bud before Emmett climbed into Drew's lap and begged him to make it stop before he decided that he never going to have kids. He turned to Lindsay and stared at her as if she'd grown another head. "That explains so much."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Lindsay demanded waspishly, her mouth pursed so tightly that it looked as if she'd been sucking on a box of lemons.
"Look up the word masochism," Justin told her, smirking when she let out a little outraged gasp; he did so love to tweak her tail these days. It was just so damned easy and he needed to get his entertainment somehow since Brian was being all Captain Caveman on him. "That should tell you all you need to know."
Justin yelped when Brian elbowed him in the ribs this time; and then scowled and glared at him as he rubbed them - like he didn't get enough of that with Sunbeam.
"Wait; why the fuck would you do that?" Brian asked as Lindsay's words clicked; and this time it was him that was staring at Lindsay as if she'd lost her marbles.
Lindsay huffed and primly smoothed her skirt over her legs. "I just didn't want to be pumped full of drugs."
"Since when?" Brian snorted, likely recalling the time after Gus was born when breastfeeding certainly hadn't stopped her from toking up and drinking E-laced punch. Thankfully she'd had the presence of mind to switch to formula after that for a few days.
"I found it to be a very spiritual experience," Lindsay said a bit stiffly, her mouth compressing into a thin line. Time to shut this conversation down.
"Yeah, fuck that; when they ask me if I want drugs, I'm going to say knock me the fuck out," Justin said, leaning against Brian as his husband wrapped an arm around him and turned back to the conversation he'd been having with Gus and Jenny. "I'm actually not allergic to these drugs, and that would be the only reason that I would forego them."
That brought on another round of laughter from everyone assembled. Well, except for Lindsay, who just scowled and shutdown. He should probably feel bad that he'd made light of the topic, but what did it take to get her to back the fuck off? He'd already told her once that he didn't need, nor did he want her advice. He had a very competent doctor that could easily handle any questions that he might have; and since Liz specialized in male pregnancy, he trusted her word over someone whose own advice was based solely on her personal experience as a woman giving birth and what she'd read on the net.
Sensing that things would get out of hand if she didn't interfere, his mother turned to him with a smile and asked, "So, have you and Brian decided on a name yet?"
Justin groaned; he'd known this question would come up eventually, but he'd been hoping to put it off for a while longer. The truth was, Brian and he had been so wrapped up in everything going on in their lives; that they hadn't really done more than toss the occasional name around. He knew that the really needed to buckle down and find the time to focus on it; but every time they'd attempted it, they had been met with some new drama. Not to mention that the whole keeping the gender a secret was an issue.
Luckily, Brian decided to come to his aid.
"We've been jotting down names that we like, but haven't narrowed it down just yet," he said, running his hand along Justin's arm to show that he had this. "And we don't really want to share since it will give the gender away; but, nice try."
"You can't blame me for trying, dear," his mother laughed, not at all ashamed of her ploy; she'd been trying to trick them into telling her the gender since they'd found out. "I remember when we were trying to decide on Justin's name; you were lucky that I won that battle. Your dad was picking the most pretentious names possible, like Preston and Tiberius; luckily, I convinced him that it was a tradition in my family to name the first male child after his grandfathers. He swallowed that down hook, line and sinker."
"Well, nothing was more important to dad than appearances," Justin said wryly, crinkling his nose at the idea of being named Preston. God, his father had no taste at all. "Although, it looks like the both of us tend to favor gender neutral names."
"Well then, there shouldn't be a reason that you can't tell us then, is there?" Emmett teased; Justin crinkled his nose and stuck his tongue out at him.
"Still not telling," Justin said, covering his mouth on a yawn. Fuck, he'd been getting tired much easier and faster these days. He hated to see what it was going to be like when he started hitting the last couple of months of his pregnancy.
Leaning back into Brian, Justin let himself drift, mostly ignoring the conversation around him as the family offered up names for consideration. Most of it was all in good fun, and mostly to poke at Brian, who immediately shot them all down. But when Emmett suggested Tallulah James, a name he'd always loved as it reminded him of his Aunt Lula, Justin knew that it was time to leave before Brian killed the other man.
Plus, it was getting close to six and Justin knew that Michael, Ben and Hunter would be arriving soon for dinner; and while Justin wouldn't mind seeing Hunter, he wasn't so keen on the other two. Especially as he was still undecided on this dinner with Ben. He had to admit, a part of him was curious as to what this news Ben had for him was; but he just didn't trust him not to say something to Michael, and give Michael the opportunity to show up and cause problems.
As it was, Brian and Justin had come over to Deb's for lunch instead of dinner, and then spent the rest of the afternoon with everyone as they showed up. Leaning up, Justin pressed a kiss into the hollow of Brian's ear and whispered, "We should get going; it's getting close to six and you know what that means."
"Yeah," Brian murmured back, tuning to drop a soft kiss on Justin's mouth. "Are we going to Mother Taylor's for dinner tonight or is it just us?"
"She and Tucker have plans," Justin said, sitting up and stretching out his legs in preparation of getting up; another thing that had been getting increasingly more difficult the bigger his stomach grew. "So, it's just us. Take out and home?"
"Sounds fabulous," Brian said in a low voice, looking around to make sure that no one was paying them any mind. "I like the idea of having you all to myself. And I do hope that you didn't forget about our little conversation from yesterday. I know I didn't."
"Brian…" Justin protested, although it was a weak one at best; in truth, he was already getting hard just thinking about all the dirty things Brian had vowed to do to him in punishment for his supposed transgressions.
"Make our excuses, Sunshine," Brian demanded quietly; and then he stood, and said for everyone to hear. "We have things to do."
Justin clambered up with Brian's assistance and did just that, exchanging hugs and kisses and making plans with Emmett to do lunch this coming week. And then they headed out, the both of them hissing when they opened the door and realized that they hadn't left soon enough. Rolling his lips between his teeth, Justin looked up at Brian, who just shrugged and kept walking as if he hadn't seen Michael, Ben and Hunter walking up the sidewalk.
Shrugging, Justin followed in his wake, nodding to Hunter, who Justin had taken a surprising liking to once they got beyond his whole wanting Brian bit, as they passed. He didn't bother to acknowledge the other two; not that it stopped Michael from opening his fat mouth and making an absolute idiot of himself. Again.
"Where are you guys going?" Michael demanded as he spun around to watch them walk down the sidewalk towards their car.
"Leaving," Justin said, keeping it short and sweet when it became obvious that Brian wasn't going to answer; Brian looked at him and shook his head, silently telling him not to goad the dumb animals by poking at them. But fuck it; he asked.
"But we just got here," Michael spluttered, as if unable to believe that Brian would simply walk away from him without a single word spoken; never mind the fact that Brian hadn't spoken to or acknowledged him in any way over the past two weeks.
"Exactly," Justin said again, ignoring Brian's sigh; he was so going to pay for this when they got home, but at the moment, he enjoyed winding Mikey up
"Listen here you little…" Michael began, walking towards them, but he didn't get far before Brian was turning around and pulling Justin behind him in a great Rage impression.
"Michael." Brian hissed sharply, flicking a look that could kill his direction; and that was all Brian had to say to have Michael huffing and stomping off as if someone had pissed all over his Captain Astro comics.
Sighing, Brian turned around and just looked at Justin for a long moment, silently chastising him for not ignoring the puffed up, annoying, little man; one that was followed by the look that told him he was in for it when he got home. What a shame. Justin just grinned unrepentantly, walked over to the car and climbed in. Brian shook his head, rounded the SUV and slid into the driver's side.
Starting the SUV, Brian looked to make certain no one was coming and then pulled out onto the road without saying a word, immediately heading for their favorite Chinese restaurant because he just knew Justin that well. He kept flicking little glances over at Justin, who hummed along with the song on the radio until finally Justin felt the need to break the silence between them.
"You know, you enjoy those verbal sparring sessions between me and Lindsay way too much," Justin observed, sending his husband a knowing look. Brian snickered.
"They should make WASP offs into a sport," Brian said, a smirk firmly planted on his lips as he turned into the parking lot of the restaurant. "We'd make a killing."
"They have," Justin said dryly. "It's called Dinner at the Country Club; remind me to take you there some time. I hear that Craig is still reeling from the last verbal beat down that Mom gave him. We could really make his day and make him deal with his richer, much more successful, faggot son and his equally impressive husband."
"As fun as that sounds," Brian drawled, his tone implying anything but. "I have better things to do; namely you, naked, and in our bed. Now hurry up and get out of the car, so that we can get food and then get to it."