JUSTIN

Brian complained loud and long as we drove to the loft to let Lindsay in. He went on and on about the likelihood the sacred bed was going to have to be burned, until Gus asked why. When we got to the loft all the guys were there helping Lindsay gather her stuff to move in. We managed to get everything done in an hour, while Lindsay took off with Gus and Jenny to get lunch for everyone. 

I planned to help, but of course Brian decided I could help by sitting on my ass. Of course Michael joked that he wished he had my excuse to get out of helping. Ben’s smile died at hearing that.

“Granted I’d end up getting the Grassi hips, so I’m good with letting others do the baby carrying for me,” Michael laughed.

“I know. While I would love to have a baby, the idea of my abs going to hell...” Emmett shivered.

“I’m working on Ted. I would honestly love to have a few,” Blake told us.

“Since I’m retiring anyway, I’ll save your abs,” Drew told Emmett.

“But we just got back together,” Emmett told him.

“No, we just got our heads out of our asses. You’ve been it for me from the moment we met,” Drew told him.

I might have sniffled a bit, and then got up, leaving the loft since Brian tends to think tears mean he needs to do something to stop them. It started with, of all things, the movie Sling Blade. Gus was interested in a game on the computer, so Brian suggested we watch a movie. I hadn’t really watched a lot of movies since I’d been working for the last few years, and when Brian and I were together TV was the last thing on my mind. Brian was a big fan of westerns and Brando, which wasn’t really my thing, so Daphne suggested Sling Blade, saying she liked it. Somehow I ended up crying the minute the guy starts talking about his life, which was horrible and grizzly. We barely got fifteen minutes into it before Brian turned it off when Gus asked why I was crying. I honestly didn’t know, but after that, everything was setting me off. Brian ended up calling Lindsay, who assured him it was natural, saying that even Mel cried, and it was just hormones.

Brian started to come after me, but I managed to smile enough that he stayed where he was. Ben came outside and sat next to me on the steps. He was thinking about something, but got over it when he looked at my face.

“You know, I’m glad Michael doesn’t want to do the pregnancy thing. I couldn’t imagine what he’d be like,” Ben told me, smiling.

“It still bothered you,” I told him, sad as hell for him, and damn it the tears started again.

“It always will. But it’s the price we both pay for our relationships, which isn’t really much since I’ve now got the kind of partner Paul never was,” Ben told me.

“So you got your head out of your ass too,” I joked.

“I also realized I was comparing things that mean nothing to Michael. And there are times when I make him feel like a kid, and not my husband. I also saw how sometimes I treat Michael’s shop like it’s not as important as what I do. We talked a lot the week we hid away,” Ben told me.

“He got to do what he loved, and to me that’s more important. It’s something we all want, and not always what we end up doing,” I commented.

“Is that why you wanted nothing to do with your father’s business?” Ben asked.

“I like going in and figuring out where things could be improved, or if the business is even worth saving. I just don’t really like my father or anything that has his name on it. I’m not sacrificing my dreams, since I still do what I want,” I told him, in case he wants to lecture me on it.

“I was just curious. I promise, I know better than to lecture you.” Ben answered.

“Good. Because I was starting to worry about my best friend,” I told him, leaning on his shoulder.

“Your best friend figured out that not everyone is like the idiots Paul brought into his life,” Ben told me.

“Michael and Brian have good taste don’t they? Too bad we stuck by assholes,” I told him.

“I wish Molly hadn’t disappointed you,” Brian told me, coming out to check on me.

“Let me go up and help my husband,” Ben said, leaving Brian to sit with me.

“Is there anything you don’t cry about?” Brian teased, wiping the tears off my cheeks.

“Let’s see, cheeseburgers, fries, and blowjobs,” I teased him, as my stomach started to growl.

“Gus said he’d make sure you have the first two, now the third one I have no problem helping you with,” Brian told me, kissing down my neck while his hand went down the back of my pants.

“Wrong place,” I told him, biting his ear.

We both looked up when someone cleared their throat in front of us. Brian groaned, laying his head on my shoulder. I looked up at the two women who seemed to both need let me know they didn’t like what they were seeing.

“Make the bad women go away,” Brian whispered, licking my ear.

“Brian, we need to talk. I can’t believe you could embarrass me like this,” The gray haired woman said, shoving a paper at us.

“Lovely, it’s triplets,” I told Brian.

“Maybe next time,” Brian said, ignoring them.

“Brian, this isn’t funny. People are talking about you,” The younger woman complained.

“I can’t show my face in church,” The older one told him.

“Why not? It’s not like everyone knowing you were drunk stopped you from going to church, Mother,” Brian sneered at her.

“This is her? Somehow I expected someone different,” I commented, looking at her.

“Joanie was a looker, at least that’s why my dad said he even bothered with her,” Brian told me.

“I would like to talk to my son alone. It’s time for him to stop his sinful ways and do his duty for our family. And to live the life we can accept from him,” Joan said, hitting the wrong button with me. No tears this time, just red hot anger.

“Justin…” Brian said, looking between me and his mother. Then shrugging to let me know to continue.

“Do you want to know the first time Brian mentioned to me he wasn’t hatched from an egg? It was when he also admitted the idea of his child being raised in a house like yours was the last thing he wanted for any child, including his. So I think I’ll make sure he’s sinning in a way that keeps him from doing his duty and makes him unacceptable to you. You can do us the favor of not coming here or anywhere else we happen to live,” I informed her.

“Brian, are you going to let him speak to me this way? Claire and I came here to talk about what you did,” Joan asked, ignoring me. Too bad I don’t plan to let her.

“Yes he is going to LET me speak to you any way I desire, because he knows my duty is to make sure he’s never around anyone that takes the smile off his face when he is in his happy moments, which usually include being IN me,” I informed her, as I moved to stand in front of Brian.

“Brian you need to listen to Mother. It’s time you stop acting like you don’t care about us. I can’t believe you stopped helping Mother,” Claire shouted.

“How?” I turned and asked Brian, since he didn’t tell me anything.

“I paid off her house and decided she could now live off what Daddy Dearest left her. I’m not going to be a hypocrite when you know how I felt about what Molly was doing to you,” Brian told me.

“Makes sense,” I agreed.

“We depended on that money Brian. What are we supposed to do now?” Claire asked, like working wasn’t an option.

“I heard the Golden Arches are always looking for shiny happy people. Oh, I guess that rules you out,” I said to her.

“Which is none of your business. Since we are talking to MY brother,” Claire sneered at me.

“I think you and I see it differently. You see, the minute Brian agreed he belongs to me, as my fiance, and soon to be husband, everything that affects him IS my business. I don’t like anyone thinking they can come and judge us for loving each other. Especially not a family who Brian seems to want to forget he came from.” I informed her.

We all looked up when Michael came out the door, not happy to see Brian’s mother and sister.

“Jesus, he’s finally happy and you two turn up,” Michael said to them. Only seeming to get angry when he looked at me. “What the fuck did you say to Justin?” Michael asked, getting in front of me.

“We came here to talk some sense into Brian. Which is something he lost when he met you and that ridiculous mother of yours,” Joan told him.

“You mean the mother who had to make sure Brian escaped the bullshit you and your husband did to him? I’ll be sure to tell her that making sure Brian’s arm was casted when you let your husband break it was ridiculous of her,” Michael told her.

“Is he serious?” I asked Brian, since he had never elaborated on his upbringing other than to say it was neglectful and unhappy.

“I told you their love would have killed me, so yeah,” Brian admitted.

“You let your husband beat him and hurt him?” I asked, wondering where she thought she had any right to demand anything from Brian.

“He was always upsetting my husband. Jack was just showing Brian that he needed to respect him,” Joan said, like it made sense to her.

“Daddy didn’t mean to hurt him, but Brian wouldn’t back down,” Claire said, just adding more fuel to the explosion I had no plans to stop.

“Did ‘Daddy’ ever correct you?” I asked her.

“He didn’t need to, because I was the good one,” Claire told me.

“So good that you repeated Mom and got knocked up by the first guy willing to fuck you. Lucky for you the hubby was just a loser who left when he got tired of the shit life he had because he knocked you up,” Brian snarked.

“He left because Claire refused to move away from me. She understood her place was with her family,” Joan told him.

“That would be enough for anyone to leave. A life with both of them,” Michael told me.

“Then Claire can support you, since she’s the dutiful daughter,” Brian informed her.

“I didn’t get to run off like you did, and forget the family.” She told him.

“No, you dropped out and added more mouths that none of you thought about how to feed and take care of. Just stuck your hands out to me, expecting me to support the family that didn’t give a shit about me,” Brian told them.

“We would if you would stop spitting in the face of God. You could have done the right thing and turned your back on this sinful life. Not made it so we were slapped in the face when everyone read about the man your with. Don’t you care what he did to that poor girl?” Joan asked, looking at Brian.

“Not really, since it was Justin’s father who knocked her up, and now wants Justin to do his duty and clean up after his ass. But that wouldn’t bother you would it? It just bothers you that Justin isn’t the good Christian woman you dreamed of, the one who would ignore your drunk stumbling because you held the Good Book in your hand,” Brian said, getting pissed.

“You know what, I’ll personally make sure neither of you ever have to worry about money for the rest of your lives,” I told them.

“Justin?” Brian asked, not liking what he was hearing.

“Really?” Claire asked, with interest.

“All you have to do are two things. Tell Brian you love him; gay, straight, or bi. And announce in church what a fucked up home life you gave him. Or, I could let the papers get the interview they’re dying to do and make sure Michael helps fill in the background on the hell Brian’s life was in your home. Think about it. A couple million can make anything acceptable,” I told Joan.

“I can deal with that,” Claire said, proving for her, money was her motivator.

“I wasn’t talking to you. How about it Joan?” I asked.

“I will not pretend to approve,” Joan sneered at me.

“I’m impressed. So leave now, before you give me a reason to announce to your world the life behind your door,” I told her.

“Mom, think of what it would do for me and the kids,” Claire told her.

“God will see us through,” Joan answered, walking away.

“I said I’d do it,” Claire told me.

“Too late. You should have stood by Brian when he was being beaten. Then I’d have given you anything, for protecting the man I love,” I told her.

Claire ran off after Joan and I turned in Brian’s arms and started bawling again. Michael patted my shoulder, worried about me.

“Crying over me. I’m touched,” Brian whispered.

“Lindsay brought vegan,” I sniffled, kissing him.

“I’ll call Ma,” Michael said, blanching.

“I tried Papa, but I got you a cookie,” Gus told me.

“It will not hurt you guys to eat healthy for once. Gus turned out healthy,” Lindsay told me.

“Like we didn’t catch you stuffing bacon down your throat every chance you got,” Michael told her, texting. “Ma will be here with an assortment for you soon,” Michael told me.

“I get why you kind of love him.” I told Brian.

“You love the food that comes with Mikey,” Brian said, kissing me.

“Look at it this way, Mikey grew up healthy too,” I told him. Managing to smile, but not fooling Brian as to what really upset me.

“Everything that happened with them stopped being a part of my life when I found you,” Brian told me, and I felt a fluttering that was almost like our baby saying it agreed too.