I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose
Fire away, fire away
You shoot me down, but I won't fall
I am titanium

--"Titanium" David Guetta and Sia

By the time Ted and Blake got home with little Phoenix Brian Schmidt, he was very hungry. Luckily Jessica had sent them home with a can of formula powder and a bottle because they didn't have any since Heather had planned to breastfeed.

Ted held Phoenix for the first time with Blake showing him how to properly hold him and give him the bottle. Phoenix sucked down about two ounces before stopping.

"Okay, now we burp him," Blake announced.

"That doesn't seem like much," Ted said, seeing how little was removed from the bottle.

"He'll only drink like, one to three ounces per feeding for the first few months. He has a tiny stomach and can only eat so much before you'll see it in reverse."

"And how many times a day will he eat?"

Blake put a burp cloth over his left shoulder and picked up the tiny infant to gently burp him. "About every two to three hours."

"Shit," Ted whispered.

"I'll go to Babies R Us tomorrow to get some more formula and bottles, plus a bottle warmer. Justin will be here to finish the mural, so you won't be all alone with Phoenix while I'm gone. We'll need more diapers and-"

"Can't you just put the bottle in the microwave?" Ted innocently asked.

"No," Blake answered sternly. The bottle won't heat evenly and you could burn him."

Ted sat there feeling completely incompetent, realizing he didn't know jack shit about how to take care of a baby.

"I'll buy you some parenting books while I'm out," Blake said sweetly as he gently patted the baby's back.

"Thanks," Ted replied.

Once the baby was burped, Ted carried him up to their bedroom while Blake put a frozen pizza in the oven. A few minutes later, Blake walked into the bedroom and found his husband standing there in a wet shirt, holding a clean diaper in his hand while a naked Phoenix was lying on their bed kicking his feet and smiling. A box of diapers was ripped open on the floor beside the bed.

"What happened?" Blake asked, trying not to laugh at the sight in front of him.

"When you handed him back to me, I noticed his sleeper thing was wet. I was trying to change him. I got the wet sleeper off of him, took off the diaper, and reached for a clean one. When I turned back he smiled and peed all over me."

"So why didn't you put the clean diaper on him?"

"I realized I've never changed a diaper before. When we babysit, you've always done it. I didn't think it could be that hard, but..."

"Youngest child problems... I've been changing diapers since I was about four, after Jason was born. Let me show you how to do it."

Blake directed Ted into their home office across the hall, where the changing table was currently being kept. Ted laid the baby on the table.

"You only want to change him on the table here, not on any furniture that he can roll off of, once he becomes more mobile. You can lay him on the floor and put a towel or changing mat under him if you're not at home. We're probably going to have to wash the blanket on the bed now."

Ted felt terrible. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay, you're learning what not to do in the future. Now, first things first: with a boy, always be ready to hover a diaper over his crotch after you pull the tabs open on the dirty diaper unless you want another shower. If he's just wet, hold a clean diaper in one hand, baby wipe in the other. Pull down the wet diaper, quickly wipe the pee off, lay the clean diaper over him. Lift his legs, remove the wet diaper, tuck the other one between his legs and under his butt. Check to see that his penis is pointed down - oh, I see they didn't circumcise him, since Heather probably left the hospital before they could get her permission to do it - anyway, smooth the diaper over him snugly and secure the tapes."

Ted was trying to mental notes. "Okay, a couple of questions. Why make sure it's pointed down? And what if he poops?"

"Point it straight down because if he moves and there are any gaps in the diaper, he will pee down instead of straight up right out of it. I'm guessing that's why he leaked just now. When - not if - he poops, you still need to do the hover-cover, but you will usually need more than one wipe to clean him. You'll need to lift him one-handed by the ankles and get him clean before all the tucking, smoothing, and taping.

"Another thing you need to know: you see how the shoulders of the t-shirts and onesies have that folded, padded looking part? Those are so you don't have to take it off over their head. It's made that way so you can slip it down instead. The first time everything solid isn't contained in the diaper, you will be very glad for those shoulders."

Ted looked over at his husband, panic in his voice. "You mean... if shit leaks out?"

"Ah, the ol' blowout. Yes, it can get quite colorful. The only hope is that you're at home when that happens, so you can get the baby in the tub to clean it all off."

Ted made a grossed-out face, hoping that Blake would be there to help clean the baby up after a blowout.

Blake had quickly cleaned, diapered, and redressed Phoenix as he had explained the mechanics of it to Ted. He made it look so simple. Ted just hoped he could remember all of it.

"After the first hundred changes, you'll be able to do it with your eyes closed," Blake said with a big smile.

Ted's eyes opened wide. "Hundred?"

"Babies shit and piss a lot, Honey, it won't take long to get to one hundred changes," Blake answered, patting Ted on his shoulder.

Sure enough, Phoenix needed to be changed again a couple of hours later. It wasn't just pee this time. Blake explained the steps again while Ted cleaned the baby up, nearly losing his pizza in the process at the sight and the smell.

"Stop laughing!" Ted said to his husband, who thought it was all hilarious.

"I'm sorry!" Blake said, though he was still laughing heartily.

Ted had the baby changed in about five minutes.

"How'd I do?" he asked Blake as he put the dirty diaper and wipes into the diaper genie, which they had bought Heather themselves.

Blake nodded in approval. "You won't win any speed contests, but good job, Dad."

Ted beamed with pride before giving his husband a kiss.

The happy couple put their son into his bassinet and began getting themselves ready for bed. The three members of the new family were settled in for about ten minutes before the youngest of them let out a loud cry.

"Jesus, that kid has some lungs," Ted remarked.

Blake threw the blankets off and put on his robe.

"Welcome to parenthood," he mumbled as he headed downstairs to make a bottle, knowing that this was going to be the first of many sleepless nights in the Schmidt/Wyzecki home.

Ted called his mother the next day to let her know about Phoenix. He started out by telling her about Heather and what had happened at the hospital. As he was explaining why they were adopting the baby, he could hear his mother start to cry.

"Mom, I hope you can understand why we need to do this..." Ted said.

"Oh Teddy, I think it's wonderful. I'm thrilled to finally have a grandson. Just because some people can't accept anyone who is different doesn't mean he isn't perfect. I can't wait to meet him."

"Really?" Ted said, relieved she took the news so well.

"I am thrilled for you and Blake. You'll both make wonderful fathers."

They talked a while longer and agreed that she would come over the next day to meet her grandson.

When Margaret came by the following afternoon, Blake met her at the door. She had her arms full of bags from baby clothing stores.

"The had all these cute things on sale and I couldn't help myself," she explained.

Blake smiled as he helped her with the bags. Margaret hadn't had a new grandchild for fifteen years, not since Ted's older sister had her second daughter, so he understood her new baby excitement. He led her into the kitchen where Ted was fixing a cobb salad for lunch.

Phoenix was in his carrier on the table. Margaret looked at the baby and started crying.

"He is so beautiful," she said, lifting him up and holding him close to her heart.

Ted served the salad and asked Margaret if she wanted to put the baby down. She refused, telling him she only needed one hand to eat. Neither he nor Blake argued with her, as Phoenix was sleeping comfortably in his grandmother's arms.

Margaret spent the afternoon with them, changing, feeding, and holding her grandson while they talked.

"You know, I get quite bored sitting at home all day, now that I'm retired," Margaret said, having retired from her career as an elementary school secretary before Christmas break. "Would you boys like for me to come by and help out with the baby a few days a week?"

Ted was relieved to hear his mother's offer, since he would be alone with the baby each day for the next few months while Blake was at work. "Oh Mom, that would be great. I'd appreciate the help."

Blake smiled at his mother-in-law, thankful and relieved to hear that Ted wouldn't be stuck at home alone with Phoenix all day. Ted would learn a lot from his mother about how to take care of a newborn, and he needed all the help he could get.

Blake was able to take a week off from work to spend with Phoenix. He had received a phone call from his mother a couple days after bringing the baby home. Carol had offered to help care for the baby but Blake declined her offer, finding it difficult to be around his parents so soon after the drama with Heather. He hoped in time that those relationships would improve, especially with Heather.

Justin finished the mural in the nursery, which of course was gorgeous. They were able to move the crib and everything else into the baby's room, although Phoenix slept better while in the cradle in his parents' room. They didn't mind, since they liked being close to him at night.

Blake and Ted took Phoenix for his first visit with the pediatrician, who luckily had experience with Down syndrome children. The genetic test result had come in, which confirmed the diagnosis. Both fathers cried when Phoenix got some shots, which he vocally disapproved of.

Despite his condition, Phoenix seemed to be a healthy little boy. He was a good eater and had gained some weight since his release from the hospital. Only time and meetings with specialists at later dates would tell how much his condition would affect him.

Once Blake returned to work, Margaret started coming over each afternoon, loving the time she could spend with her grandson. Ted asked her one day if she would watch Phoenix so he could take a short nap, having been up with the baby half the night. Phoenix was sleeping too, so she didn't mind.

Margaret was able to clean the kitchen and dust the furniture before the baby woke up demanding lunch. She fed and changed her grandson and was talking to him, thinking that her son was still asleep.

"My precious angel, I am so thrilled to be your Nana. You remind me so much of Joshua. He had the same silky hair and sweet smile. Back then, not a lot was known about this condition. A lot of the reason for that was probably due to people feeling ashamed of having a wonderful angel like yourself. Parents were told to take them home and just let nature take its course. Unfortunately, that's what happened to too many of you, but you have wonderful daddies and a great family who will always make sure you get the best of everything."

"Mom?" Ted called out as he walked into the kitchen. He had woken up and was about to get a drink of water when he heard what his mother was saying to Phoenix.

Both he and Margaret had tears in their eyes. She reached her hand out to her son.

"I was only four when Joshua was born," Ted said to Phoenix. "He was so beautiful. When he was born, my parents were told to take him home and just let him live as long as he could. There was no testing, no doctor's appointments, nothing. I loved him immediately."

"You loved being a big brother," Margaret said.

"He was so little and soft," Ted continued. "I would sit in his crib and feed him."

"You never changed his diapers though, you said it was too yucky," Margaret added with a chuckle.

"I still think they're yucky. I played with Joshua like he was my own little baby doll. He died right after his first birthday from a heart condition. It broke my heart to lose him."

"Have you told Blake about Joshua?"

Ted shook his head. "No... I really should, huh?"

Ted knelt down next to his mother, and they held each other and the wonderful baby they could share.