CHAPTER NINE: NO DEPOSIT, NO RETURN

JENNIFER:

As I replay the voicemail from Justin for the third time, I’m still a bit puzzled. It wasn’t so much what he said, but the inflections in his voice that has me wanting to march over to the loft and shake him. He said that some things are coming down the pipe and he’s going to need me to handle Debbie as a fellow mother. Of course that means that Michael has fucked up again, but for him to put me up to dealing with Debbie? Well, I simply can’t wait to hear about this latest drama with Brian’s best friend.

I shake my head as I head to the wine fridge to pour myself a large glass of red. I hate those damn Realtor dinners where it’s all about schmoozing. It’s not that I’m not good at handling them since they increase my business, but it’s that they remind me too much of the boring business dinners Craig used to demand of me when he needed his trophy wife to be on full display. Thankfully, I’m out of that particular shit, but now it’s dealing with a bunch of pretentious assholes on the same level as I am. Part of me is gratified that I’m making strides in my chosen profession, but the other half wishes for nothing more than being able to skip this part of the process.

I’m about to settle on the sofa and put my feet up when I hear the doorbell ring. Automatically panic begins to clog my throat that it’s in reference to one of my children. Molly is staying over at a friend’s house, but Justin… I know he’s at the loft, but since the bashing it only takes a phone call or a ringing doorbell after normal WASP visiting hours to have me spooked. I’m surprised when I open the door and see not only Judge Harold Stone, but some other men and women with him. I could tell from their manner of dress that this was not exactly a social visit. Each were garbed in high-quality suits or dresses that I would have bought myself. And although some looked familiar within the set of society I’ve been circling within for years, others did not.

“Good evening, Jennifer. May we come in? This won’t take long, I promise.”

“Su-sure.” I step aside and usher them into the parlor. I’m trying to slow my racing heart, but it’s taking longer than usual to do so. Sometimes having WASP breeding has it’s advantages, even if I do feel a fine sheen of perspiration on the back of my neck, and my hands suddenly feel a little clammy. Gathering my innate manner, I get my hostess duties out of the way first and foremost. “Please have a seat. May I offer you all something to drink?”

“No, thank you, dear. As we’ve said this won’t take long,” he tells me. “Due to the lateness of the hour, I’ll come straight to the point. It has been brought to our attention that your son and his partner are responsible for the downfall of former police chief Stockwell…”

“Yes,” I answer tersely. I know that I should have been a smidge more graceful, but if they are here to criticize what Brian and Justin have done for the community, they will find a whole lot more incivility right now!

“Calm down, Jennifer. This is not a call to upset you in any way. In fact, I think you will be most shocked and ultimately pleased by the reason for our visit. I’m sure that you are aware of all the charity work I participate in within the LGBT community and the inner-city. I am determined that the Pupil-to-Prison pipeline discontinue. Ironically, it doesn’t just involve children and adults without the resources to better themselves, but also runaways. Through some research, I have found that in Pittsburgh most of those runaways are of the gay population, and this saddens me."

“And me as well. I’m ashamed to admit that in the earlier years of Justin’s coming out, I was one of those parents that didn’t understand, and was married to probably the most homophobic man of my acquaintance, even if I didn’t know it at the time.”

“Indeed, but you have changed your tune marvelously over the years. And I also know that you are also active within the community to better the lives of those around you.”

I nodded and then thought, is this about a donation? “Forgive me for being so blunt, but what is this really about, Harold? And who are these people?”

He smiled wide. “I’m pleased to introduce you to the committee I work with in my charity endeavors. Each of them have also been affected by the work your son did along with Brian Kinney in reference to Jim Stockwell. You see, these men and women behind me are the parents of people who ended up like Jason Kemp, as well as his own sister and her husband.” I look around to each of them and realize that some of them are about my age or a little older. There is one couple though who look to be about Brian’s age. The younger woman addressed me.

“Hello, Ms. Taylor. I am Jasmine Kemp-Fields, and Jason was my twin brother.”

“Oh my God, I’m so sorry for your loss.” I honestly didn’t know what else to say. Remembering the picture of that young man, I could see the resemblance as plain as day.

“I’d been looking for Jason for over two years. My mother was powerless to stop our former stepfather from violating him and then beating him before he tossed him out of the house. Perry and I had just gotten married and had no knowledge that this was happening. Our mother now sits in jail for finally taking action and killing the bastard, but everyday from then until the announcement of Jason’s death, she asked if we’d found him or heard from him.” I couldn’t stop the tears pouring out of my eyes, thinking that it could have been my own son who ended up like that young man. “So, although we are saddened by his death, we actually came here to thank you, Brian, and Justin, for stopping another monster who was prepared to abuse him. Only this time, the monster in question hid behind the blue wall of silence and was in a position of power. You worked to give Jason back his name, and for that I will always be grateful. No monetary gift could ever repay you and your sons for giving me a chance to visit his final resting place.”

Harold comes over to the armchair, sitting on its edge and putting an arm around me. He clears his throat of the emotional moment before speaking. “Jennifer, although the community themselves don’t know of the sacrifice of Brian and Justin as of yet, which I will make sure they do, the Fly Free Committee would like you to present them with this token of our esteem in an effort to get them back on their feet. They risked everything, things that I’m not sure anyone else would even if they could, to right a terrible travesty of justice and prevent a new one.”

He handed me a check for three-hundred thousand dollars. Three-hundred thousand dollars?! It was taking everything within me not to pass out! I swallowed hard, fighting back the emotion and thinking of all that my sons- for that is truly how I view Brian, as my own- have gone through these past months. The constant worry that they both have tried to hide from the outside world; the sacrifices of the things they really needed, but were too proud to ask for; the selling of their creature comforts; the job loss and Justin working like a fiend to make ends meet so that they wouldn’t have to do without the basics, like water and electricity… ALL of those things! And I find myself thanking a God who I wasn’t sure I believed in anymore because He just showed me that there are still good people in this world who genuinely care. I bring myself out of my reverie, still in awe of this moment, but I have to know… “Why didn’t you give this to them yourselves? I’m sure they would have wanted to thank you personally.”

“Brian and Justin are experiencing some difficulties at the hands of a man who they once considered a friend. I can’t be seen in their company right now, because I signed the order for the records of the business the perpetrator owns to be confiscated. As for the rest, at this moment they choose to remain anonymous, although they will eventually have to come out of the proverbial closet themselves.” He chuckled at his own joke as many of them snickered. “We don’t do what we do for praise and fame, even if I perform on the public sector as a drag queen from time to time. We do what we do because we are passionate, and genuinely love people. We also do it because we each have suffered intolerance by proxy. Just like they have lost family members to people like Stockwell, so have I. My sister was killed some thirty years ago because she preferred the company of women to men. Some man took offense and thought to teach her the harshest lesson of all. I don’t ordinarily believe in the death penalty as my moral compass is violently opposed to it, but I was glad when he was finally given his lethal injection twelve years to the day after my sister’s murder. If I’m wrong, may God forgive me, but there was no redeemable behavior in that man!” He takes a shuddering breath, and grips my shoulder a little tighter before releasing me. “Now that we have finished what we came to do, Jennifer, we will take our leave of you. By the way, eighty thousand of that money was Jason’s inheritance. Jasmine and Perry felt strongly that Brian and Justin should have it.”

“Thank you. Thank you all! I know that they will honor you all by what they do with your gifts to them. It’s been really…” I sigh deeply. “It’s been a tough road, but Brian and Justin are resilient that way. Somehow instead of them weakening to the point of giving up, they just become stronger.”

“Tell them to expect more. They deserve it!” Harold tells me as he moves towards the door.

I hug each and every person as they leave, but Jasmine is the one I hold onto the longest. “Please, keep in touch. Let me know how you and Perry are doing? I know that I can never replace your mother and having her with you, but if you ever have need of me, please don’t hesitate. Okay?” She smiles at me and with one more hug, is gone behind the rest of the crowd.

As I close the door, I look at the check in my hand once more and think, Oh Michael, what the fuck have you done now to have Harold Stone confiscating your records? And now I know just why Justin said that I would need to handle Debbie. Can you say IM-FUCKING-POSSIBLE?!

DEBBIE:

I haven’t heard from Michael all evening, and it’s starting to worry and piss me off by turns. Since he’s been gone, there hasn’t been a day that’s gone by where we haven’t stuck to the three-times-a-day phone call rule. I remember mentioning it once to Brian and Justin when I’d asked if Brian had heard from him. ‘It explains so much’ Brian said when Justin had questioned its validity. Part of me wanted to smack the smirk off his face; no one could possibly understand the relationship I have with my Michael! But then I thought about how things stood between him and Joan at the moment and just figured it was the jealousy talking. So I shrugged it off. But at that point, Michael hadn’t called Brian his normal fifteen times a day either, which makes me question: Where the fuck is Michael?

Oh, I know I should be more worried about Hunter and the situation with Rita, and I am to a degree. No child should be pimped for their mother’s habits. But I do fault him for escaping the foster homes that the state put him in order to return to hustling. It makes me think he likes it, or if not the act itself, then the money it gave him. I have to wonder about young men like that. I mean, from what I’ve heard, Jason Kemp was from a neighborhood much like Justin’s. Was he so hellbent on playing fast and loose that he’d brought his murder upon himself. I would hate to think so, but it still reminds me of Hunter in a way.

Granted, it was Hunter who got the DNA sample and name that we needed to bring Stockwell down, so that’s something I guess. But then there was the whole situation with Brian and Justin’s involvement. Why would they involve the kid?! Hunter denies that they did, but you know, I just don’t believe him. I’m reminded of how worldly Brian was at Hunter’s age and decide that if the shoe was reversed and Hunter had been the adult in the situation, Brian certainly would have played Hunter within the same scenario. So me thinking that Brian put the kid up to it isn’t as far-fetched as one might think.

Strangely, Brian and Hunter have this whole moral compass thing that doesn’t quite work the same way as everyone else’s. They live by this motto: if it feels right then do it ‘til you’re satisfied. Whoring is WRONG no matter what form it takes, or what reason it has for that matter. Perhaps, I’m being a bit judgemental considering their circumstances, but there it is. Even though I love them both as if they are my own, it doesn’t make them any less incorrect in my eyes. It’s why I have honored Brian and Justin’s wishes that what they have done remain a mystery. I don’t want to glorify what Hunter did, nor Brian and Justin. Yes, it yielded the desired results, but that the end of the day, Hunter still whored himself at Brian’s behest and with Justin’s blessing. It’s just wrong in so many ways! I’m just glad that my Michael never took that particular wrong turn while following behind Brian. Now Sunshine… well he’s a different story altogether.

I can’t understand how someone who grew up within the upper echelons of society can allow himself to be lured back into Brian’s web so easily. Sure they have been through a lot together, but what is it going to take for Justin to understand that Brian was just a stop-gap on the superhighway of growing up. Just because he fucked him, didn’t mean that Brian was going to be with Justin for all eternity! If that was the case, I would have never let go of Danny and we’d both have been miserable for the rest of our lives. I don’t want to see that happen to Justin, but hey, what can I do? I really thought that he and that Ethan kid were well-suited. I mean their both artistic and young. They have their whole lives ahead of them and endless talent. They should be together! Maybe, I can figure out a way to make that happen, or even help him find someone new. Yeah, that’s what I’ll do. I’ll get a list of eligible boys together for Justin to have his pick, but first I have to get him away from Brian fucking Kinney.

Now that’s not to say that Brian is not a good man. He is, but he gets Justin embroiled in circumstances that are way too far over his head. If Brian had taken on Stockwell by himself, that would be one thing. But no! He had to go and drag Justin down with his schemes and now Sunshine is in the same boat as he is. It breaks my heart watching Justin work all the hours that God sends trying to support himself and Brian, while Mr. High-and-Mighty refuses to work a job that’s beneath him to help out. I’ll never understand what makes Brian Kinney think he’s any better than Michael who worked at the Big Q for YEARS before he was able to open up his store. Okay, so Brian worked hard at school, but so did Justin, and we see where that has gotten them. Michael is now successful, and Brian is unemployed. Justin is just…

Well as soon as I have some time alone with him to pull his head out of his ass, I’ll set Sunshine straight! He needs to return to school; beg them to take him back if he has to, and not be a Mr. Goody-two-shoes about it. He needs to apologize and then move on with his life. But most of all, he needs to forget about Brian once and for all. Now that Michael is making enough money not to have me working double shifts and borrowing from my mortgage to cover his expenses now, Brian should see him as an equal. It’s what he’s been working towards all the years. I may not think that Brian is right for Michael, but my baby wants him. We have invested a lot of years into Brian and he owes it to me- to us- to make Michael happy at long last. So I’m determined to see that he has what he wants and that’s that! But first, I need Michael to check in with me. I wonder if everything is finally ready for Michael to take the next step and if he needs my help again for him to do so.

As for Ben… well Michael said that he was just something to pass the time until Brian was ready for him, which he apparently is now since he tried a relationship with Justin. It’s no secret that I didn’t want Michael involved with Ben in the first place, so it seems a perfect time for Michael to ditch him and make his move on Brian at long last. I mean, why tempt fate? Ben fucking Michael- after all, I KNOW my son is not a top- has been like watching Michael play Russian Roulette with his health. It’s time for them to stop! No more of this practice and placeholding nonsense. It’s time to turn Ben loose to fuck up his own life or find someone else to fuck… I really don’t care as long as it’s not with my son any longer! And it’s time I see to it!

The knock at the door interrupts my thoughts. It’s quite late and I’m not expecting anyone. So when I get there, and see who it is, the first words out of my mouth are, “What do you want?”