Chapter 32

They kissed for what felt like hours and at one point Justin had started to rip off Brian's jacket. Brian had sighed eagerly and had taken off Justin's jacket as well. Promising himself that he would let Justin set the pace of their reunion, Brian chuckled into the kiss when he felt small hands making short work of his shirt buttons by merely ripping the shirt open when the buttons wouldn't open fast enough for the younger man.

“Eager much?” Brian laughed into the kiss and in response was nearly jumped by the blond who kissed him only more fervently.

Brian kissed him back just as passionately and enjoyed the taste and feeling of Justin being back in his arms. God, how he had missed being this close to him. God, how he had missed the reactions that Justin's kiss was causing in his body. How he had missed running his hand through the blond's hair and down his chest, how he had missed the feel of the smaller hands on his own, now naked chest.

He gasped when Justin pinched his right nipple and felt his cock harden even more. By now Brian felt like he was about to burst. Justin didn't seem willing to slow down any and started to move his hands down Brian's chest and to his pants. When the hands stopped on his belt and began making short work of it, Brian forced himself to pull back from their kiss. He smiled to himself when he heard Justin's disappointed sigh.

“I won't be able to stop if you go any further,” Brian warned him and his heart nearly burst when he saw blue eyes looking back at him, filled with a deep hunger and passion, but most of all love.

“Don't want to stop, need you, Brian,” Justin breathed out as he flung himself at Brian's chest and started leaving featherlight kisses all over Brian's upper body. “Want you, can't wait any longer,” he whispered inbetween his kisses.

“God, Sunshine. You're fucking killing me here,” Brian groaned when he felt his nipple being bitten.

“Missed this, Brian,” Justin murmured as he moved his mouth down Brian's chest to his navel.

“Missed this, too. You've got no idea,” Brian gasped as Justin stuck his tongue into his navel. Brian's navel had always been an erogenous zone for him and it drove him out of his mind when Justin lavished it with attention.

Justin once again moved his hands to Brian's pants and opened them. He looked up at Brian and smirked when their eyes met. “Still going commando, I see.”

Brian only shrugged in response. “What can I say, I like the artistic freedom.”

In reply Justin snorted. Once he had gotten himself under control again, he moved his hands to Brian's hips and was about to push the pants down. He frowned when he felt Brian's hands on his own, stilling his movements.

“Brian?” Justin looked up at him from confused, slightly hurt eyes as well. He wondered if Brian had stopped his actions because he didn't want Justin to give him a blowjob. Brian had always loved his blowjobs and had claimed more than once that Justin gave the best head in the world, but maybe Justin had misinterpreted his earlier enthusiasm and they weren't ready for this yet.

Brian slowly pulled Justin up and pulled him close, holding the younger man tight in his arms.

“Let's not do this here, please,” Brian whispered.

“Brian?” Justin frowned at the older man, not sure why they had stopped. Seconds ago Justin had been ready to go down on Brian and now here they were standing and talking.

“I want this, Justin, more than you know,” Brian had to smile to himself when he felt Justin relax in his arms and saw him smile back at him with his sunshine smile. “But not here. Not a quick blowjob in the hallway. I want us to do this properly. It's been so long,” he whispered as he turned slightly around and opened the door to the master bedroom.

“I didn't nearly kill myself to give you romance all night only to end the night with a quick fuck in the hallway.”

Justin's eyes shone with happiness as he looked at Brian and then followed the man into the master bedroom. He closed the door behind himself and looked at Brian who was slowly walking over to the bed. Once Brian sat down on the edge, he motioned for Justin to follow him. Once Justin sat down next to him, he put his hand under the blond man's chin and looked him deeply into his eyes with a gaze that bore right into Justin's soul.

“So are you coming or going? Or coming and then going? Or coming and staying?” Brian whispered and leaned in to catch Justin's lips in another hot, searing kiss. He smiled to himself when he heard Justin's breathless reply a few minutes later when they had to come up for air.

“Coming and staying,” he stated with conviction, his eyes shining with happiness and most of all lust. He leaned closer into Brian's body and pushed the older man down on the bed. Brian slowly moved them up to the head of the bed, the whole time keeping in contact with Justin. They never stopped kissing and never stopped touching each other. It almost felt as if they were thirsty men who had just been given their first glass of water in days. They just couldn't stop drinking each other's presence in.

After several more minutes of touching and kissing, Justin once again moved down to Brian's pants and this time pulled them down, allowing Brian's hardened cock to spring to attention.

“A true beauty,” Justin admired before he slowly leaned down and took the long shaft into his mouth. He started licking around the head, lavishing it with attention from his tongue before he moved down to suck on the shaft. Brian's gasps became louder and Justin couldn't help but smirk. Apparently Brian still loved his blowjobs if his reaction was anything to go by.

Brian's hand was buried in Justin's hair, keeping his head in place as the man was sucking down on his erection, every once in a while changing pace and bestowing kisses and gentle licks on his hardened member.

“Jeez, Sunshine. You still know how to give the best head in the world,” Brian gasped, nearly unable to get enough breath to voice his thoughts. It was amazing what Justin's mouth was doing to him and the sensations the younger man's mouth on his penis were causing him.

Justin only smirked happily and then groaned deeply as he tasted the first drops of precum. God, how he had missed the taste that was so uniquely Brian. How he had missed the feel of Brian's cock down his throat, how he had missed the smell of Brian's pubic hair in his nose as he blew the older man. All those well known sensations came back to him and he felt nearly overcome with emotion when he realised how much he had missed this and how much he had needed this.

When Justin changed pace once more and changed from soft licks to quick deepthroating, he felt the telltale signs of Brian's impending orgasm. He felt the muscles in the other man's stomach contract and prepared himself for what was coming. He couldn't wait for Brian to shoot his load into his waiting mouth. God, how much he had missed that taste.

When Brian finally exploded, screaming Justin's name in ecstasy as he came, Justin couldn't help but look at the hazel eyes that were nearly black now with passion with a look of pure happiness himself.

After Brian had emptied his seed into Justin's mouth, Justin licked his now limp dick clean and moved up to the man's side, snuggling into the side of the panting man who was still trying to catch his breath.

“That was amazing...”

Justin only smiled in return and removed a stray strand of sweaty hair from Brian's forehead before he leaned in and kissed the man passionately, allowing Brian to taste himself in his mouth.

Both man groaned and they kissed for several minutes before Brian pulled back and looked at Justin seriously. “You're definitely still wearing way too many clothes, Sunshine,” he pointed out with a wink and Justin could only agree. Unlike Brian he was still dressed in his pants and shirt and it was time to change that. He quickly undressed too and then snuggled back into Brian's waiting arms.

“I missed this,” he sighed happily as he ran his hand across Brian's stomach.

“Me too, Sunshine,” Brian agreed, hugging the younger man closer. When he felt Justin's erection press into his thigh, Brian couldn't help but smirk. “How about I repay your favour first though?”

Justin turned on his back and smiled a sunshine smile at his partner. “I wouldn't complain.”

“Then I better get onto it,” Brian smiled and moved down Justin's body leaving featherlight kisses everywhere on the younger man's chest and abdomen. He followed the sparse trail of hair down from Justin's navel to his pubic hair and grinned when a hard erection awaited him.

“I love when you greet me like that,” he smiled before he got down and took in Justin's long, hard shaft, returning the younger man's earlier favour.

Once Justin had come as well and both man felt sated for the moment, Brian moved back up to the top of the bed and lay down next to the younger man.

“Not bad,” he announced and Justin could only help but frown, not quite sure what Brian was refering to. His frown had to have told Brian about his confusion, so he continued. “Apparently we still got it, even after all these years.”

“We always had it,” Justin said silently, laying his head on Brian's chest, listening to the man's heartbeat which had always had a calming effect on him. In their earlier days Brian had often teased him for being a hopeless romantic and a lesbian for admitting that truth, but now Brian stayed quiet and just wrapped his arms around the younger man. They were actually cuddling. Justin was about to comment on that, but then stopped himself, not wanting to break the moment. He was beyond happy and he didn't want to risk that by sending Brian running over the hills because of a remark that he hadn't thought through. Though after their earlier night and judging by the way Brian was holding him close now, Justin wasn't sure if maybe Brian wouldn't stay where he was even if Justin commented on them cuddling. But better be safe than sorry he told himself and gently ran his fingers over Brian's muscled abdomen. Brian was still as fit as he had always been and to Justin he was still the sexiest man alive.

Justin sighed happily, but stopped when his fingers found a small bump on Brian's lower abdomen. He moved his eyes down to see what his fingers had found and frowned even more when he saw a small, slightly reddened area of scar tissue. He couldn't help running his fingers along it gently and frowned when Brian tensed underneath him.

“Brian?” he asked gently, moving his eyes away from the scar to the man's eyes. He was shocked when he saw that they were glassy and Brian seemed to be fighting back tears.

“What's going on?” Justin asked in obvious concern, leaning on his elbow, looking at the man beneath him.

“It's the scar of the caesarean when Luke was born,” Brian whispered and ran his hands through his hair. “I am sorry, I know I promised you not to feel guilty anymore, but...,” Brian stopped, fighting to find the right words.

“Shhhhhh,” Justin whispered as his fingers once again started trailing the soft scar. “I know it's not easy and I know it'll take time, but you'll get there. We will. I know we will,” he said with conviction and Brian could only be amazed once again by the man's belief in him and their relationship.

“Tell me about it, Brian,” Justin whispered looking down at the pained hazel eyes from shining, loving blue ones.

“Tell you what?”

“About Luke being born, the pregnancy. I want to know,” he said sincerely, his fingers never stopping their caress of the scar.

“Justin, let's not do this,” Brian pleaded with the younger man, but knew he had lost when he saw the intensity with which blue eyes were looking at him.

“I really want to know, Brian. I think... I need to know and you need to tell me. We need this,” he said seriously as he leaned down and kissed Brian gently.

They kissed for several minutes before they broke apart to catch their breaths. Justin once again settled in his earlier position with his head on Brian's chest and pleaded with the older man once more. “Tell me, Brian. Please.”

After several minutes of silence he was pleased to hear Brian's quiet voice as he began telling him about his pregnancy.

“When I found out about being pregnant, I felt shocked. Really, it was the only emotion I was feeling at the time. I couldn't believe it. I mean, we've always used protection and god knows we knew how to use it, but still there I was, pregnant with our child. That lasted only for about two minutes and then I felt this happiness spread through my body. We had created this baby and we had created life. It might not have been planned and it might not have happened the way I had imagined, but I couldn't help but feel happy anyway. The pregnancy was an easy one, thank God. I went through some morning sickness as you know only I didn't know at the time what it was. After that, it was pretty much an easy pregnancy. I spent months getting Britin ready and preparing a room for Luke and having Gus here with me, talking to his yet unborn baby brother in my belly made me happier than I ever thought I could be. I... I know I shouldn't say that, not with what happened between us and what I did, but... I was happy, Justin. I was happy to be carrying this child and I was loving him more and more with every second I was pregnant.”

“You don't need to feel bad about being happy, Brian,” Justin whispered, gently running his fingers over the scar. “I am glad you got to enjoy the pregnancy. I know it might be hard to understand, but I am glad that whatever happened between us, didn't make your pregnancy a bad experience.”

“The knowledge that we had created something as beautiful as a new life kept me going, Sunshine. The knowledge that I would always have a part of you with me, no matter where you were or what our relationship was. Those thoughts pulled me through any bad moments I had really.”

“Tell me about his birth,” Justin urged gently after he had nodded at Brian's explanation. As weird as it sounded, he could understand the older man. Luke had pulled him through the first hard weeks of being back in Pittsburgh. He didn't doubt for a second that his unborn son had also been able to give Brian the same strength back in the day.

“It hurt like a motherfucker,” Brian said emphatically and Justin could only snort in reaction to Brian's choice of words.

“No, really. Try being fucked without lube by a rhino,” Brian emphasised only making Justin laugh harder.

Brian gave him a few minutes to calm down before he continued.

“The moment they pulled him out of me though, all the pain was forgotten. It was all gone, not even a memory of it left. All I could think was: We have created this human being. We did it! He was a perfect mixture of you and me and I immediately fell in love with him. He's been such a joy from the beginning. Such a happy baby. A fucking loud baby when he cried for hours on end at night, mind you, but still a happy baby. He made me forget all about the bad things in my life and he and Gus became my sole reason for being. Their happiness was my utmost goal in life.”

“You're a great father, Brian,” Justin assured Brian, knowing that due to his own troubled childhood Brian had always doubted his abilities as a father. “Gus and Luke couldn't be luckier than having you as their father.”

“You're not quite so bad yourself,” Brian retorted with a gentle smile. “They adore you, Justin. I think they love you more than they love me. If you wouldn't make them so damn happy, I'd be raging with jealousy,” he muttered and looked up when he felt Justin's hand lift up his chin so they were looking at each other.

“Brian, it's only because I'm the new one. The new person in their lives. They love you just as much as they always have. You just wait for the excitement of me being here to die down and then they'll get bored of my ass pretty soon. Once I start being mean and dealing out punishments, they'll be wishing I had never turned up here,” Justin tried to joke, but realised quickly that his joke had fallen flat. Brian didn't look amused and Justin had to admit it had been a really bad one.

“I'm sorry, Brian. It was a bad joke.”

“They love you, Justin. They will always want you around,” Brian said seriously, running his hand over Justin's naked backside in gentle, soothing movements.

“What about you?” Justin whispered, looking at Brian's hazel eyes with slight insecurity.

“I am never letting you go again,” Brian whispered, claiming the blond's lips with his own in a searing kiss. “I won't make the same mistake again, Sunshine. You're mine and you're here to stay. You better get used to it,” he said inbetween kisses.

“Good,” Justin nodded, “I don't plan on going anywhere. You better get used to that, too.”

“I think I can,” Brian winked as he pulled the younger man close and their kiss got more intense. Soon they were gasping and dry humping their erections against each other in a fevered rhythm.

As they were kissing, Justin put his arm on Brian's and slowly directed his partner's arm lower down his back until it settled on his round, plump ass.

He broke their kiss and looked into Brian's hesitant eyes from lust-filled, shining ones. “Please, Brian. I need you.”

Brian held his gaze for the longest time before he nodded slowly and ran his hand down Justin's ass, squeezing the round globes now and then. He carefully guided his index finger to Justin's hole and gently caressed the area, which resulted in the younger man gasping and moving his lower body back to press against Brian's hand.

“My, my, aren't you eager?” Brian chuckled and was rewarded by another push of Justin's ass in the direction of his finger. After teasing his partner for several more minutes, Brian finally had mercy and slowly entered the tight hole. Justin's breath hitched and his eyes closed in pure ecstasy.

“Jeez, you're tight, Sunshine. Almost tighter than I remember,” Brian whispered as he gently moved the tip of his index finger around, slowly pushing in a bit further.

“It's been a while,” Justin gasped, enjoying the feeling of being filled again. “Need lube.”

Brian nodded and removed his finger from Justin's hole which only resulted in a disappointed sigh from the younger man. When he made to get up from the bed, Justin frowned at him in confusion.

“Brian?”

“I'll need to get some from the bathroom,” he told Justin and quickly went into his ensuite. When he came back a few seconds later with a condom and lube, Justin couldn't help but laugh.

“No lube in your bedroom? Really, Brian?”

“Well, it's not like I needed it, did I?” Brian reasoned, his eyebrow raised in question.

“You didn't prepare for this?” Justin wiggled his eyebrows and his lower body, making Brian sigh.

“Honestly?” Brian asked and when Justin nodded, he continued. “No, I didn't. I didn't want to pressure you into anything you weren't ready for. I was hoping, yes, but I didn't dare to dream this might actually happen.”

Justin's eyes shone with emotion as he listened to Brian's sincere words and he couldn't help but feel the need to kiss the man again. He pulled Brian back into the bed and pulled his head down so they could share a passionate kiss.

“Thank you, Brian. I appreciate that,” Justin replied sincerely and looked the taller man deep into his eyes as he grabbed the bottle of lube and opened it. He squirted a generous amount onto his own fingers and then led them slowly down to his own ass, gently working the first finger in. Brian had always been incredibly turned on by Justin preparing himself and Justin grinned satisfied when he noticed that that hadn't changed. Brian's eyes were glazing over and he was panting as his own dick once more came to life and hardened painfully.

The whole time as Justin was preparing himself, his eyes never left Brian's and they held a silent conversation that only confirmed the depth of their feelings for each other. By the time Justin was done preparing himself, Brian's cock was already leaking and Justin couldn't help but urge Brian to lean down over him so Justin could take a quick lick.

“Sunshine, you better stop or I can't guarantee I'll still be able to fuck you,” Brian gasped as he felt Justin's tongue around the tip of his cock. Not wanting to risk a chance of losing out on a fuck from Brian, Justin let go off the erection with a painful sigh. He looked up at Brian from expectant, slightly nervous eyes.

“Just be careful. It's been a while,” the younger man whispered and Brian frowned at the tremor he heard in Justin's voice. Justin almost sounded nervous which made no sense to Brian. It was obvious that Justin wanted this, wanted them to have sex, so why was he nervous? He reminded Brian of their first time together, but Justin was hardly the same blushing virgin anymore that he had been back then.

“Are you sure you want to do this? We don't have to, Sunshine,” Brian said gently as he ran his hand along Justin's face.

Justin nodded eagerly, his eyes shining at Brian with all the love he was feeling. “Please, Brian. I need you inside me. Just... it's been a while.”

Brian frowned when Justin repeated that statement and he suddenly got an idea what Justin was hinting at. He couldn't believe it to be true, though.

“Just how long is a while, Justin?” He asked seriously, never ceasing his hand's movement on Justin's cheek.

“It doesn't matter, just fuck me, please!” Justin pleaded, rocking his hips and his own erection against Brian's to get his attention away from their conversation. He really didn't want to have this conversation right now.

“How long?” Brian only repeated, levelling his gaze with Justin's, making it clear that he expected an honest answer.

Justin sighed heavily and put his arm over his forehead, as if to hide away in embarrassment. “Six years, more or less...,” he muttered finally. He wanted to cry in frustration when he felt Brian's movements with his hand stop. “Brian, please... It's no big deal,” he whispered.

“Are you saying... that... I?” Brian asked from wide, surprised eyes. He had expected many things, but for Justin not to be fucked by anyone in the last six years ever since they had broken up had not been one of them.

Justin only nodded, not feeling as if he was able to form the words to confirm what he knew Brian had figured out correctly.

“How come? You love cock up your ass!” Brian exclaimed in shock.

“Your cock,” Justin muttered, before he looked at Brian once more. “Can you please not make a big deal out of this and get on with it? Six years has been a long time and I really, really crave your dick in my ass right now.”

“I just can't believe it,” Brian said once more in obvious astonishment.

Justin sighed, knowing that there was no way that Brian was going to fuck him anytime soon if they didn't talk first. “What's so hard to believe? I've never bottomed for anyone else after you. With other people I've only ever topped...”

“Well, I know you crave a good fuck just as much as any other good bottom,” Brian replied.

“From you, yes. From someone else, no! Never have, never will. You're the only one getting close to my ass.” Deciding to turn the tables on Brian, Justin raised an eyebrow at him when he asked. “How often have you been fucked since Luke?”

“Never,” Brian said seriously. “You know you're the only one getting close to my ass, Sunshine,” Brian smirked.

“Why is it so hard for you to understand that it might be the same for me? You're the only one getting close to my ass and I'd really appreciate if you could get on with it. Six years has been way too long already,” Justin said, before he decided to resolve to more drastic methods. He pulled his legs around Brian's waist and pulled the older man closer, rocking his hips so their cocks would touch and rub against each other. When he felt Brian shudder against him and heard his breath quicken, he smiled to himself. Distracting Brian with sex still worked apparently.

Brian only needed a minute to get over what he had just heard from Justin, feeling his rock hard cock rub against his own made him completely forget about all sense and reason. They dry humped for a few minutes, kissing lazily as they did, before Justin looked at Brian and urged in a lust-filled voice. “I need you, Brian. Please, fuck me.”

Brian's eyes locked on Justin's and he shook his head which frustrated the younger man to no end.

“Briiiiiaaaaannnnn, please!”

“I will make love to you, not fuck you. We can fuck some other time, but tonight we make love,” Brian whispered gently into Justin's ear as he kissed his earlobe and then travelled down his neck and shoulder until he moved back to his mouth.

They were kissing gently and Brian's hands were roaming Justin's torso while Justin's hands were running all over Brian's back and his ass, pulling him even closer.

Brian lined up his cock at Justin's entrance and looked his lover deep in the eyes as he slowly pushed in. He felt the resistance from the ring of muscle and stopped, allowing Justin to get used to the intrusion. He saw the quick flash of pain on the younger man's face and knew it was an unavoidable part of what they were doing, thank God it had merely been there for a second before it was replaced by love and most of all trust.

“Go on, Brian,” Justin urged once he was ready and their lips met in a gentle kiss as Brian slid all the way into Justin's tight hole.

“So tight, Sunshine,” Brian gasped as he felt the pressure around his cock. “Damn!”

“Love you, Brian,” Justin whispered as he felt complete for the first time in six years. He had missed the feeling of Brian's cock inside him and now that it was back, he felt as if he had come home. Yes, he told himself. This was his home. Making love with Brian in their family home that they shared with their sons. This was all he wanted in life.

“Love you, too, Sunshine. More than you'll ever know,” Brian replied gently, kissing Justin once more before he slowly started moving as well. This was perfect, this was what had been missing to make him as happy as he could be. But now here it was, here he had Justin in his bed, wanting him to make love to him and Brian hadn't felt as ecstatic and happy in a long time.

When they broke their kiss, he slowly started moving in and out of his Sunshine and their bodies met in a rhythm they had always known so well and had perfected over time. It didn't take either man long until they felt their climax built, but that didn't matter to either of them. All that mattered was that they were there, together, sharing this lovemaking.

Justin came first and spurted his seed all over his body and Brian's upper body and feeling the spasm run through Justin was all that Brian needed to come himself. He followed suit just seconds later and they both sighed happily as they collapsed in each other's arms.

“Love you,” Justin gasped and smiled when he heard the sentiment returned by a breathless Brian.