Chapter 11 

Brian sighed happily as he flopped down in the rocking chair and rested his swollen feet. He took a look around the room and couldn't help but feel a smile creep up on his face as he took in the changing table, the crib and the closet that was already overflowing with romper suits the grandmas hadn't been able to resist buying for the newest member of the family that would be with them in about two months. 

Over the last two months Brian had busied himself with getting Britin ready so that he and his baby could live a comfortable life there. He had already moved in three days after that fateful night at Babylon where Michael had found out about his pregnancy and had remodeled the property while already living there. That hadn't always been easy, but he would have been damned if he had accepted any of the offers he had received from Debbie, Jennifer or Ted to stay with them for the time of the remodeling. Staying with them would have driven him crazy and he had insisted on staying at Britin so he could oversee the remodeling himself.

He had started with the master bedroom, making sure that he would have a room to stay in and had then moved on to his office, so he could work from home during the last weeks of his pregnancy and the first months of his baby's life and had then finally moved on to the nursery. It had taken him forever to find furniture and colours that he had liked and that Gus had also approved of and every time he had thought he had been done, he had been reminded by someone – most often Jennifer and Debbie – that he had forgotten something. While working on the nursery, Brian had also started to get a room ready for Gus.

During his visit to Toronto, when he had informed Lindsay, Melanie and Gus about his pregnancy, he had talked to the girls and had asked them to have Gus join him at Britin every once in a while. There was no way he would be able to fly to Toronto or make the drive up there highly pregnant just like he wouldn't be able to fly up there to see his sonny boy once the baby was born. He had talked to Lindsay and Melanie and at first both women had been reluctant to agree to have Gus visit him in Pittsburgh, but in the end Lindsey had agreed when Brian had told her that he would foot the bill for the flights and would of course always include a ticket for one of the mothers to join Gus as he agreed that the boy was too young to fly on his own.

It had been weird to see Lindsay change her mind so quickly when he had thrown in that incentive, but at the time he had refused to think about it any further. In the following weeks his mind had often wandered back to his visit and to how strangely excited Lindsey had seemed about his pregnancy. There had been a definite gleam in her eyes when he had announced his news and for some strange reason she had immediately agreed with him that it was right to not inform Justin about the baby. He had expected Lindsay to put up more of a fight, seeing how she had always been supportive of their relationship and had often called Brian out on his bullshit during the years he had been with Justin, but this time she had agreed that Brian was doing the right thing, of course on account of Justin's career. Thinking about it, Brian had realised that it did make sense after all as Lindsay had always been just as supportive of Justin's career as she had been of their relationship. After all, hadn't it been her who had shown him the Art Forum article? Hadn't it been her who had pointed out what a great career move New York would be for Justin?

In the end Brian had refused to think much more about Lindsay and had just blamed her weird behaviour on the fact that Brian would be raising a child on his own and wanted to be more involved in his son's life at the same time. Something that obviously had not been expected by her.

Melanie had been a different story and had made her disagreement quite clear. She had called him names and had accused him of many bad things, but in the end had gone along with Lindsay. He didn't really know why, but he figured that Lindsay had to have convinced that wife of hers that he was doing the right thing. 

During that visit he had also talked to Gus and had told him about him and Justin not being together anymore. He had tried to explain as well as he could to a five year old that their relationship had finished and that they wouldn't come and visit Gus together anymore, but that instead Gus would now come to Pittsburgh and would visit him there. Gus had been confused and upset at first and it had taken Brian a considerable time to console his sad son. The news about Brian having a baby hadn't really helped matters. It had only upset Gus more and after some serious talking with his son, Brian had found out that Gus had been scared that Brian having a baby would mean he would forget about him and wouldn't have as much time anymore to spend with Gus as he had done so far. Gus had used JR as an example and Brian's heart had broken for his son when he had seen his tears.

He could understand where Gus had been coming from, after all JR had been born and immediately there had been the custody battle for her between Melanie, Lindsay and Michael. Things had changed drastically for his young son who had moved out of the only home he had ever known with Lindsay and Brian could understand why he might have gotten the impression that nobody had cared about him anymore. Brian had blamed himself for quite some time afterwards for not having seen what the custody battle and separation of his mothers had done to his son at the time and for not stepping up and spending more time with him then. In the end he had talked with Gus as honestly as he could and had promised to him that nothing would change in their relationship even with the new baby. He had promised Gus that he could come and visit him and the new baby as often as his mothers would allow and that he would always be the baby's big brother and could help Brian take care of his little sibling.

Gus had cheered up a bit at that prospect and by the end of Brian's visit, had even kissed his bump goodbye, promising his baby brother or sister that he would take good care of him or her. Brian's heart had melted and a tear or two had escaped his eyes – damn pregnancy hormones!- at Gus's words and he had only fallen more in love with his sonny boy. 

Ever since that visit to Toronto, Lindsay and Gus had come down to Pittsburgh and had visited him three times already. Gus had been excited to be staying at the big house with Brian and he had been even more ecstatic when Brian took him shopping to furnish his room. Gus' room now had a fire truck bed and Gus had been beyond ecstatic to spend his first night in the bed that was shaped like a fire truck. They had also gone and bought toys, so Gus would have something to pass the time and make the room really his.

Brian had been most amused however, when Gus had insisted that once his room had been done, he would need to help with the baby's room as well. After all he was the big brother and had to make sure the new baby would like the room. Gus had taken his job very seriously and had pulled Brian to three furniture stores before he had been happy with the crib and changing table they had finally chosen.

Every time Gus had come over for a visit, Brian had made sure to include his son in his pregnancy as much as he could. He had allowed Gus to read to the baby whenever he had learned a new word to read and had also allowed him to touch his bump whenever the baby was kicking. Brian hadn't been able to hide the love in his eyes when he had seen and heard his young son bond with the new baby growing inside of Brian. Gus would cuddle with him and would start conversations with the baby that could go on for hours, telling the baby all about the things they would do together once it was born. More than once Brian had been moved to tears by how loving his son was and he couldn't help but wonder if he had been that involved in JR's pregnancy. From what Brian had witnessed, he would have said no as the girls had seemed to have been focused on themselves way more than on Gus or the pregnancy at the time, but he ruefully had to admit that he hadn't really been a part of Gus' life enough at the time to really know for sure.

All he knew was that Gus was excited about the new baby and he felt incredibly grateful that Gus didn't feel threatened by the arrival of his new sibling. Ever since Brian's visit to Toronto Gus had never mentioned his fears about being abandoned again. Brian wondered if maybe it helped that now Gus was always visiting him and not the other way round. With them being at Britin, they could spend more quality time together than they had been able to in Canada where Brian had always stayed in a hotel and had to leave in the evenings and where Melanie and JR would always have been present as well, demanding his and Lindsay's attention away from Gus.

As far as Brian was concerned, moving his visits with Gus to Pittsburgh had been the best decision they could have made. Apparently the visits also did Lindsay good. Every time she spent the weekend at Britin with Brian and Gus she appeared happier than Brian had seen her in a long time. Much to his relief she never bothered him about Justin and never even mentioned him to Brian, which made Brian's life a lot easier.

Brian slowly shook his head and brought his mind back to the here and now. He looked around the nursery and his eyes stopped on the mural on the far wall, a mural of a forest scene with several trees and some squirrels and birds and other small animals in it. It looked great, but looking at it once more, Brian knew that it wasn't really perfect. It would have been perfect if Justin had done it. If Justin had been able to do a mural for his baby's nursery it would have been a true masterpiece, of that Brian was sure. 

“Hey there, you're quite active today. Are you excited about your room finally being finished?” Brian asked in a gentle voice as he ran his hand over his now bulging stomach and felt his baby kick him repeatedly. 

“It looks really lovely,” he continued in a quiet voice. “I am sure you will love it. Gus and I put a lot of hard work into this room being perfect for you and Aunt Lindsay helped with the mural on the wall.”

Brian stared at the mural for the longest time before he continued talking. “I really wish it would have been your other daddy who would have done this mural for you. He would have loved doing it. He would have locked himself in this room and he would have created a real masterpiece,” Brian whispered as his thoughts drifted to Justin and a sense of sadness infiltrated him.

“Your daddy is an artist, you know? A fucking great one. He has more talent than anyone I've ever seen before. Certainly more than those morons in my art department,” Brian chuckled to himself as he ran his hand over his bump and felt another kick.

“He almost lost his ability to paint, but he fought hard to get it back and now he's in New York and he will be a famous artist one day. He's a genius and his art is breathtaking. He can create masterpieces in mere minutes. One day I'll show some to you and you will understand why I couldn't make him give up that talent. He has to follow it, he has to become the artist he is meant to be.”

Brian carefully got up from the rocking chair and cursed when he found it harder than he had anticipated. His bump always got in the way and made it harder and harder to navigate through the house. Brian slowly walked over to the room across the hall which was the master bedroom and settled down on the bed there. He felt exhausted after a whole day of unpacking boxes and filling closets in his son's and baby's room with new clothes and needed to take a nap for a while.

As he lay down on the bed he could feel more kicks from his baby and couldn't help but chuckle. “You're quite the soccer player, aren't you?”

He turned onto his side and tried to get into a comfortable position before he rested his hand on his stomach and started talking once more. 

“You and Gus will get on so well. He loves playing soccer as well and he loves you. You have no idea how excited he is to meet you and how glad that makes me. I won't lie, I was really nervous about how he would react  to the news about you, but he's such a good boy and he will be a fucking great brother. You will love him...,” Brian sighed once, thinking about his sonny boy who would be back for his next visit in three weeks. “He lives in Canada with his mommies, but he comes over for visits regularly and he really helped me with your room. I am sure you'll immediately love him when you meet him for the first time. Between me, Gus and your grandmas you'll be so loved, I already feel sorry for you. Your grandmas will spoil you endlessly. Hell, you should take a look at your closet and how many romper suits are already in there. They sure went crazy when they went shopping for you... But you know what? I can't blame them. I love you, too and I am just like that and... it warms my heart to know that you'll be loved. You will grow up with only love in your life, I'll make sure of that. Nothing bad will ever come to you, not if I can avoid that,” Brian whispered, before he slowly drifted off to sleep.

He was awoken what felt like minutes later, but was really an hour and half later when he heard his phone ring. He carefully turned around and lifted his phone from his night table.

“Yeah?” He asked without checking the caller ID and cursed himself for that oversight a second later when he heard a whiny voice greet him.

“Brian? Where you are? There is some weird guy in your loft.”

“I am at home,” Brian said tiredly.

“No, you're not. I am at your loft and like I said, there's some weird guy here.”

“He's not a weird guy, he's my tenant. And I'd appreciate it if you would leave him alone. I don't want him to move out right away again because you keep showing up without invitation. In case you didn't notice, your key doesn't work anymore and the code for the outer door has been changed,” Brian sighed.

“What do you mean tenant?”

“Tenant as in a person that pays me money to live in my property.”

“You are renting out the loft?”

“Ding, ding, ding. You got it, Mikey.”

“Where are you?”

“As I've told you before, Mikey. I am at home. Where exactly that is, is none of your concern. In case you don't remember, the last time I saw you, I told you I didn't want to see you again,” Brian was getting angrier with every minute he was on the phone to Michael.

After their argument at Babylon they had run into each other two more times at Debbie's dinners, but every time Michael had just repeated his bullshit about Justin having trapped Brian by getting him pregnant and how Brian should give up the child once it was born. In the end Brian had left, had given his apologies to Debbie who had been flabbergasted by her son's behaviour and had told her that she was welcome to visit him at Britin as long as it was only her and Carl and not her son. Thankfully Debbie hadn't made a big drama out of it and had agreed that meeting with Michael when he was behaving like that wasn't good for him during his pregnancy. So they had started having weekly dinners together at Britin where Jennifer, Debbie and Carl would come and visit him. 

Michael however hadn't gotten the hint and had continued contacting Brian. He had shown up at Kinnetik only to be told by Ted that he wasn't welcome on any of Brian's company premises, meaning Kinnetik and Babylon and had continued calling him at least once a day. Usually Brian ignored the calls, but sometimes he would talk to Michael, hoping that he had finally gotten a clue and had returned to being his old friend. So far that hadn't happened. 

“I am your best friend, Brian,” Michael whined and Brian could only wonder if he was for real. Best friends? After how Michael had treated him in the last two months? Definitely not as far as Brian was concerned. 

“Michael, don't you have a husband to take care of? I can't imagine him being happy with how much time you spend trying to talk to me.” Brian felt slightly bad for pulling Ben into this, but he had heard from Ted that Ben was growing increasingly impatient with Michael's behaviour and had demanded that his husband stop stalking Brian and focus on their marriage instead.

“Don't you worry about Ben,” Michael started. “He understands how important it is that I take care of my best friend.”

“Well, then take care of whatever person is your best friend for it sure as hell isn't me as long as you can't accept the fact that I am having a baby and will raise that baby,” Brian angrily replied.

“Brian, those pregnancy hormones must really be messing with you. You and I both know that if you were acting normally and thinking clearly you wouldn't want this baby that boy wonder has trapped you with.”

“His name is Justin. Get it in your fucking head that his name is Justin and not boy wonder,” Brian yelled, before hanging up. He wasn't surprised when his phone immediately started ringing again, but this time he knew better and just ignored it.