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CHAPTER 6 - ...THIS IS HOW WE DID IT AND HOW SHE SAYS IT

 

BRIAN

 

“You want to tell or shall I?” I head to the cart to pour us some drinks.

 

“Oh no, you can tell.” Justin replies, waiting for me to join him on the sofa and leans into my side. “You have a much better way with words.”

 

“True, I am the best adman in Pittsburgh. Actually the whole of the…”

 

“Ahem! Tips and spank bank need to be added to! Get on with it!” Ems demands.

 

“Oh, alright. So it was during Maryland. We had just come back from a very long day, and were starving…”

 

Start of flashback

THE INN AT PERRY BY BELMOND, MARYLAND - JUST UNDER THREE YEARS PRIOR

 

KITCHEN, EVENING

 

“Brian, can you take the blindfold off?!” Justin demands.

 

“Not yet. Be patient, oh tempestuous sprite!”

 

“I am not tempestuous, I am hungry…” Right on cue his stomach growls. “Bri.an. I am getting hangry now!”

 

I can feel my temper starting to rise at his brattiness. He has been like this since the restaurant was forced to close early because of flooding just before his starter was served. Then, all efforts to find food were thwarted as the knock on effect was that everything in the immediate vicinity was rammed.

 

“Calm down or you won’t be fed!” I snap, and he folds his arms.

 

“Fed?! I don’t even know where the hell we are! We could be in the western quarter of Beirut for all I frigging know!”

 

“Justin! I was trying to be patient, but since you are determined to be a brat take the blindfold off, eat, and then go be miserable elsewhere!” I snarl and stomp to the table. He stays where he is.

 

“Which way am I supposed to be facing?! Blindfolded here!”

 

“Well take the fucking thing off!” I bellow, and he rips it from his head. “See right in fucking front of you is the dinner that I asked the chef to prepare for you because that’s what you wanted in the restaurant!”

 

“Well, if you had told me that then I would’ve eaten a snack beforehand!”

 

“How many times did I have say ‘please eat something it will be fine’?!” I scream at him.

 

“When?! When did you say that?! I didn’t hear you over the roar of my stomach!”

 

“All the way back to the hotel!”

 

“No you didn't!”

 

“Yes, I figging did!” I heave in a calming breath. “Can we eat now?”

 

“No, I want to starve!”

 

“God! If you are like this over the restaurant being flooded, it will be hell arranging to get freaking married!”

 

“So you don't want to marry me now because I am hungry?!”

 

“Thought you were hangry! I would rather do it quickly than have you behave like Princess Bitchness when things don't go your way!”

 

“Princess Bitchness?!” He stands up looking like a raging bull. “Find someone and we will do it now and get it out of the way!”

 

“Fine!”

 

I stalk to reception and explain the situation, she stares at me for a few seconds.

 

“What? Can you help us?”

 

“We have a priest staying here, do you have your licence?”

 

“Of course!” I snap, exasperated, then sigh. “I love the man with all my heart, but I can't go through this for months!”

 

The door behind me bangs open and Justin is almost purple with rage. “So are we getting married now or not?!”

 

“I’ll call him.” She smiles sympathetically and quickly picks up the phone. After five minutes of rapid conversation, she hangs up and smiles. “He’ll be down in five minutes. There is a chap…”

 

“No, in there is perfect!” Justin blasts. “That way I can eat my wedding dinner and then go to my room for my solitary honeymoon night! Is there another room I can book?!”

 

“Preferably on the other side of the hotel?!” I seethe.

 

“Uh, yes, but maybe….” She begins.

 

“Book it for me, please, under the name of...have you decided what we are going to be called?!”

 

“Yes! Book him under the name of Justin ‘Princess Bitchness’ Taylor-Kinney!” I head back to the kitchen without a backward glance.

 

I cover the food back up and wait for his highness to come in, but it is not him, it's the receptionist, I frown. “Called the chef, instructions for the oven. To keep the food warm, the ceremony…” She looks round the kitchen. “...will be a while.”

 

The door opening again brings in my soon-to-be husband. “At least someone is showing me consideration!”

 

“Are you shitting me?!” I roar.

 

“Gentlemen!” A voice yells, silencing us both. “Take it you are the happy couple?!”

 

“Yes, we're sure delighted to be doing this!” Justin stomps to the table. “Where do we stand, let's get this done so I can eat!”

 

“YOU COULD'VE EATEN ALMOST TWO HOURS AGO! YOU CHOSE TO WAIT!”

Flashback interruptus

 

“Just a second, are you telling is that you and Justin got married in the kitchen of the hotel you were staying in?!” Ems gapes at us and Slick just shakes her head.

 

“Yep.” Justin buries his head in my chest, his face flaming. “And the wedding night apart.”

 

“Apart?” Slick echoes. “Did you at least have dinner together?”

 

“Yeah. He married us, we ate and went to our rooms.” Justin cringes. “It was lovely, the meal I mean. We had guacamole with sesame, dauphinois potatoes gratin, and cherries in wine. I spent the entire night sobbing because it was my fault.” He looks up at me. “I had visions of you gone and an annulment waiting for me on reception.”

 

“As if!” Slick and I say at the same time.

 

“So what happened next?!” Ems sips his brandy. “Back to the hotness!”

 

Back to flashback

NEXT MORNING

 

I haven't see him, and the receptionist from last night is not on the desk, nor is he picking up his phone. Sighing, I go to do another circuit around the dining room.

 

“Good morning, Mr Taylor-Kinney!” I cringe as the priest from last night strides towards me. “I take it from that expression things are still at an impasse?”

 

“Yeah.” I shove my hands in my jeans pocket. “Not even answering my calls. We discussed this, we agreed that...”

 

“Ah. So that's who it belongs to.” He pulls out a phone and hands it to me. “And he is in room 612.”

 

ROOM 612 - THIRTY MINUTES LATER

 

The door opens and there is a gasp. “Brian?” His tear filled voice asks and I move the bouquet, I have just bought, so I can see him. He looks awful, red eyed, snot nosed and shattered. “Are...are those for me? After the way…”

 

“I have only one husband, so yep. A husband, who really should put his phone in his pocket and then queen the hell out.” I hand it to him. “Wanna check it? And shall I put these in water for you? Have you eaten?”

 

He opens the door wider and I step inside. “You called me 47 times.” He starts to sniff.

 

“Uh huh. Another question, why were you sleeping on the sofa?”

 

“Couldn't.” He murmurs. “Let me do these.” He reaches for the flowers and buries his nose inside. “I am so sorry!” He wails, tears streaming down his face. I take the bouquet and pull him into my arms. “So sorry, so sorry!”

 

“Sssh. Apology accepted. Now go and have a shower and I will…”

 

“Don't leave me!” He pleads.

 

“I am just going to move to…”

 

“No. I want to come back to our suite!” He asserts and then looks around. “Bed’s too big without you.”

 

“Come on then.”

 

TAYLOR-KINNEY SUITE AN HOUR LATER

 

BEDROOM

 

Our hair is damp from the shower, the room smells of ginger from the shower gel and the honey and dark chocolate body oil that I am massaging into his skin. “I can't believe the way you...” He looks over his shoulder at me as I press and knead his delicious looking bubble butt.

 

“I deserve it.” He husks and we lock gazes. “I deserve each and every one.”

 

“You do…” I get off him and head to the lounge. “...now come, as you are, and get them.” I sit on the sofa and wait for him to join me. His eyes are glowing much like his ass is going to be. “Drape. And you get twelve.” He says nothing just quietly joins me at the sofa then lays across my lap. He hands me a butt plug. I raise an eyebrow and smile. “Ah the pleasure pain principle…” He nods. “...I can do that. Now stay absolutely still...”

Flashback interruptus

 

“Slick! Slick, for god sake what's wrong?!” I grab my best friend as she weeps hysterically. It takes her a good ten minutes, two more brandies, and a special back rub from Ems to calm her down. “So what brought that on?”

 

“You married him in a kitchen, despite the raging row, you married him in a kitchen. You love him that much.”

 

“I do. But…”

 

“Can I have my phone, Ems?” He rifles in her bag and hands it to her, she calls a number and speaks to the person before smiling and signalling for a pen. She writes down the number before repeating it and hanging up. “Can you get Lindon and Mel for me, Justin?” He rushes out the room and all three are back in under a minute. “That was my ma-in-law, she’s given me Nasty Nancy’s number. Seems that Lindsay is sharing house.” She puts her phone on speaker and calls the number.

 

“What are you going to do?” Mel demands quietly.

 

“Like I said…”

 

“Peterson-Cameron residence, Lindsay Peterson speaking.”

 

“Ah, just the creature feature I want to talk to. This is the Ghetto Queen, or as my friends call me, Slick.”

 

“How did you get this number?! What do you want?! I am recording this conversation!”

 

“So are we.” Mel calls out.

 

“Mel? Why are you with Slick? Dumped Lucy have you?! Seems that Mother was right about the great GQ being a lesbian?!”

 

“Nope, still very much with Lucy, and very happy to be so. Aren't you going to ask then?”

 

“Ask what? What could I possibly want to know about your life?”

 

“Nothing, I was thinking more along the lines of Gus and Jenny…”

 

She inhales sharply. “I was going to call you to see if they would see me. I have only just been released.”

 

“Liar, you've been out for well over a week. But the reason I am calling you is to suggest you treat your daughter as you treated your former son and daughter and leave us alone.”

 

“How I treat my children is none of your concern, GQ!”

 

“Not them, I mean Annabeth, the little girl you gave away minutes after her birth. She is loved and cherished by Lindon and I. And if you do anything to mess with that, the spanking you got in prison by Queen Edna and friends will feel like a cooling cloth on a fevered brow.”

 

“Spa...what do you mean you have my daughter?!”

 

“Be quiet and listen! Bear in mind that you are out on probation when you decide to play a dangerous game!”

 

She slams down the phone and we all look at Slick.

 

“And the point of that was? I mean, apart from to tell her.” Ems frowns and then frowns harder as Mel smiles wider. “What?!”

 

“She’s not yours, Brian.” Mel grins; Lindon looks more than bit relieved, and if I am honest so am I. “She's made no effort to contact you since she’s been out. The last time she was released from prison she headed straight to Kinnetic.”

 

“And this puts us on an even footing.” Slick sips her drink and eye fucks Lindon.

 

“Ah.” Ems chuckles. “She doesn't know who the dad is either.” Then he stops laughing. “You don't think…”

 

“Yeah.” Slick sighs. “He's the other port in a storm Lindon and I have to go dock in.”

 

“We. We all, have to dock.” Justin tilts up her chin. “We wouldn't have us, be us, without you. It's our turn to protect you.”




Guacamole: https://www.thespicehouse.com/recipes/asian-guacamole

Gratin Dauphinois: https://www.deliciousmagazine.co.uk/recipes/ultimate-gratin-dauphinois/

Cherries: https://nationalpost.com/life/food/cook-this-cherries-in-wine-with-cardamom-cream-and-rose-pistachio-shortbread

 

 

 

Chapter End Notes:

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