CHAPTER 36 - HER LOVE AND JEALOUSY - PART TWO

OFFICE OF DAPHNE CHANDERS - AFTERNOON

DAPHNE

“This is the family room.” I call over my shoulder as I lead in Lindsay and Michael, who have their usual supercilious air about them. 

“It’s nice and airy.” Lindsay looks around. 

“I would love a cup of coffee.” He looks at the machine then me. I switch it on, and he looks so pleased. They take their seats, making themselves comfortable, smugly comfortable.

“I won’t be long, just need to get the cups, etc.” I am back within five minutes. I put the crockery and coffee stuff by the side. 

“Thanks. Any chance of cookies?” He smiles at me. He reminds me of the Kraken, just before he eats the virgin...yuuuccck!

“What kind would you like?”

“Whatever you have, we don’t want you to go to any trouble.” Lindsay smarms.

“No trouble at all.” I smarm back. I wait outside the door for three minutes before re-entering. 

“Oh, no cookies?” Michael looks at my empty hands, then his watch. “We’re early enough, maybe I could go and get some for all of us?”

“Entirely up to you.” I shrug.

“We can leave our stuff here, can’t we?” Lindsay rises. “Come on, Michael, the stores are only a ten minute walk away. It’s 1300, we’ve got plenty of time.”

“Would you like me to lock this room for you? The reason for asking is that I am going to be going over my papers. The receptionist, Gina, doesn’t start till half one, so there will be nobody there to keep an eye in your absence. We share a building…”

“Let’s put our stuff back in the car instead.” Michael interrupts as he gathers. “But lock this room as well, so that nobody but us and the rest of the family can use it. You can leave the key for Gina, right?”

“Of course.” I return. They start to scuttle out. “See you soon.”

THIRTY MINUTES LATER

LINDSAY

“Oh these delicacies look great! It took longer than we thought, but so worth it.” I peruse our purchases. “I can’t wait for a cup of coffee.”

“Me neither. Did you manage to find out anything about his appointment?” Michael slurps noisily on his slushy. 

“No. As I said, I found out after, then was shut down, but my main concern right now is this hook up that Mel is having!”

“Why? You’re not interested in Jewel are you? Newsflash, she doesn’t like you!” He laughs.

“She doesn’t like you either, but having her as an acquaintance would add a certain prestige to my social…”

“So you’re not interested in Dad anymore?”

“I am always interested in men, Michael. Which man depends on my mood.” 

“But why were you with Mel then? Have to say you are a very convincing lesbian!” 

“Thank you! As to why, it was to grate on my Mother. It caused such a scandal when I first walked in with her. Mother’s face was a picture. And ‘being a lesbian’ gave me the perfect cover for my many, many affairs!”

“All with guys?”

“Yep, but none of them related to me!” I know exactly where he is trying to go, so I decide to head that off at the pass. “As you once said, we are the same, but at least I didn’t…”

“Okay, okay!” He grumbles whilst blushing. 

We fall into silence as we approach the building. Walking into the coolness is a blessed relief.

“Hi, how may I help you?” The receptionist smiles.

“Dr Chanders has left a key with you for the family room. We are here for the Kinney appointment, as…”

“...his family and supporters.” Michael chimes in.

“Ah, yes, I have a note. Follow me, please.” She leads us back into the family room, but upon seeing our purchases frowns. “I am sorry, but you can’t have those in here.”

“But Dr Chanders said that we could bring back refreshments, as she didn’t have any.” I point out. 

“I see. Let me get them taken up for you.”

“Up, what do you mean up?” Michael frowns.

“Before I answer that, may I take your names?”

“Lindsay Peterson and Michael Novotny.” I reply, looking longingly at the coffee machine.

“Wait one second.” She takes our provisions with her, I hear her talking to someone. When she returns, her demeanour has changed.

“So where are we going?” I ask.

“Nowhere.” Her tone is crisp. “Her offices are shuttered now. Nobody is allowed to enter until the appointment is finished.” 

“Why weren’t we told this?!” Michael demands.

“Why would you be? It’s not your appointment…” When a bell rings, she steps back. “...I will be right with you! The appointment should be finished by about four. In the meantime, you can watch a movie or maybe take a stroll.”

“Or maybe have some coffee!” Michael snaps, gesturing to the machine. She shakes her head. “Now what?!”

“It’s been set to clean, started half an hour ago. Now, excuse me. If you need anything, please use the intercom.” 

It takes a minute or so for us to come around from our disappointment and shock. “Let’s make the best of a bad situation and go to the smoothie shop, you know where we got your slushy from?”

“Yeah. I suppose.” He grumps but when he tries the door it doesn’t open.

I grab the intercom, after the fourth buzz, she picks up. “What is the meaning of this?! Why have you locked us in?!”

“Part of protocols of patient confidentiality is that unless you are the patient or an invited participant, you can’t see anybody. I will unlock the door once the guests have been taken upstairs.” 

As we gape at each other, I could swear I heard Gus laughing!

DAPHNE’S CONSULTATION ROOM - TEN MINUTES LATER

DAPHNE

“Works every time!” I giggle as they start to calm down. There was no way on earth they were going to get past Gina. 

“So let’s…”

“Brian, breathe.” I smile as Justin takes his hand. “Nice and slow, in and out from the stomach, not chest, is best. On my count...in for three, hold for three, then out for three. Ready?” Brian nods and we wait for him to take him back from the edge. “Better?”

“Yeah, thanks.” He whispers, before putting their clasped hands on his thigh.

I look around the assembled group. We’ve grown a bit. As well as Brian, Justin, Brandon, their parents, Ben, and Gus; we have also been joined by Leda. This was Mel’s idea, as she will be representing Brian in whatever fallacy that Lindsay is trying to cook up, so she needs to know everything. When Mel told him about Lindsey's plans, he just laughed. Both Jewel and Leda think it will be tossed before it gets anywhere, but just in case. 

“We’re going to begin with the video that Justin took outside Jack Kinney’s house.” As I go to press play, I notice Brian, he is looking at the floor. “Brian? I can blur the screen if you don’t want to see him.”

“Just...no, no it’s fine.” He steadies his resolve, and looks up. “Okay, go.”

“I want to play it all the way through first, okay?”

“Alright.” Brian replies after the nod from Brandon.

BRIAN

Justin’s hand is warm and dry. The stroking of his thumb against my palm is soothing. Slowly, I stare at the screen. “He tidied the garden. It was always a mess.” When I see him for the first time in years, I am amazed, he looks...looks so healthy! I always remembered him being kinda grey or yellow when he wasn’t hitting me, because when he did, he was bright red. I snort at the old jalopy he had gotten out of, amazed that it is still running. I am unsurprised by her wanting to know about Brandon. She never cared much about me, but it’s when he mentions Carl that confused looks abound. What does Dad have to do with this? Then my heart stops...she did it, she beat so badly! 

“I remember. I remember the shouting!” I exclaim. She pauses the video. “He was shouting at her to get off me, to stop. The blood was in my eyes where…” I reach up to touch a long healed scar. “...this, she hit me in the head. I was still trying to get her off me, off my shoulder, but I ended up hitting him instead. Then I passed out. When I came too, he was still lying on the floor, and you two were gone.”

“Shit.” Ben breathes.

“But what does this have to do with Carl?” Leda asks. 

“Carl, Debs, do you recognise the woman?” Daph queries. They shake their heads. “I did some digging. You might know her better as JJ Carpenter.” 

CARL

My mouth drops open seconds after Debs’ does. “JJ Carpenter, are you sure?!”

“Absolutely. Who is she?”

“She’s...Carl’s ex, the senior cheerleader in our school.” Debs gulps. “They were in the same class. Had been going steady, as we said then, for what…”

“Three, maybe four months, but then Debs transferred in. And she was loud, brash, but under it all was a caring soul. She was always helping others. She quickly became popular, but despite that she was, and still is, modest. Anyway, about three weeks after Debs arrived, JJ cheated on me. Didn’t find out for a while; when I did begged me to forgive her, and I thought I could. Then one day, I was in the bleachers, studying, and this vision asked if she could borrow a pencil. We got to talking, and I ended up telling her about JJ’s infidelity. Do you remember?”

“Yep. I sat there for about a minute, and said, 'if you forgive her, you will always be wondering when she will do it next, because by forgiving her, you’ve weakened your position. She has to earn back your trust, her saying sorry doesn’t do that....'”

“'...it eases her guilt, not your pain.'” I finish with a smile, it is something that we have always tried to instil in Michael whenever he would do something stupid. But he would just do puppy eyes, then blub his apologies. Over the years, it was something that neither Kiki nor I fell for. It took Debs a bit longer, but eventually she caught onto him!

“Do you know why or how she ended up adopting your children…” Daphne pauses to allow us to absorb this. “...after she married the man she cheated on you with?” 

BRANDON

“What?!” There is so much to take in!

“You okay? You doing okay?” Ben rubs my shoulder. I nod, before accepting the water. As I drink, he scoots his chair closer, then rests his arm over the back of mine. “Lean on me when you need to, alright?”

“I will. Continue, Daph.”

“It has to be it, don’t you see?!” Mom suddenly exclaims. “The prom!”

“Prom? What about the prom?” Brian frowns.

“Oh my lord!” Dad scruffs his face. “Soon after the bleachers encounter, we used to say hi when we crossed paths, but JJ didn’t like it. She ordered me to stop talking to Debs. She said that I shouldn’t have any friends that were girls except her. When I pointed out she had friends that were boys, she said that was different! When I refused, she was furious, then two months later she dumped me. JJ went out with the top jock almost immediately. I think she expected me to be jealous, but to be honest, I was relieved. Then came prom. JJ went with her jock, and your mom and I went, but as far as I was concerned, just as friends, until it came to the booth...”

“...it was a kissing one.” Mom continues. 

“Best kiss ever?” I laugh.

“Yep!” Dad blushes. “She became two things that night: one, my girlfriend; and, secondly, prom queen.”

“Let me guess…” Brian sighs. “...she beat JJ?”

“By a country mile!” Mom chortles. 

“But how does she end up with them and married to him?” Leda frowns. Daph shrugs. “Okay, let me look into it.”

“Thanks, Leda. Also, I was given this.” Daph takes up an envelope and hands it to Mom. “Do you recognise it?” 

“Oh my god! It...it can’t be?!” She looks at Dad, who starts to tear up. 

“What is it?” Brian kneels down in front of them, I join him. “Please tell us.”

“It’s our letter! Our letters to you both when we gave you up.” Mom sobs. “How...how did you get this?!”

“I didn’t, Mark did.” Daph replies. “I watched the video a couple more times, and I saw what you saw, Brian: A man who had turned his life around, so we went to see him. Mark wouldn’t let me get out of the car.” 

BEN

“What did he have to say for himself?” Brandon whispers.

“This…” Daph clicks the TV on again. 

“Hello...can I say their names?”

“It’s up to you.” Mark replies.

“Boys, I am sorry. So sorry for everything I did, but, Brian, I want to tell you something about the day after you hit me. She came back, asking where you were. Said you were in the hospital, and wouldn’t be discharged until the next day. I asked about Brandon. She said he was sleeping at a friend’s house. She had a lot of friends, most of them drink-based and men. She didn’t even ask what hospital, just told me to call her when you were back home, but you never did, for which I am eternally grateful…no, please let me explain, Mark! Joan hated Brian as a kid, I mean really hated him, because he was all Debbie. Brandon was all Carl. She always protected Brandon. Yes, I was strict and didn’t spare the rod, but she came in after and punished you more. I didn’t realise this for years, and with me drinking so much, I would have blackouts…”

“Why did you drink so much?” Mark asks.

“Because I was miserable. She was always comparing us…”

“Who?”

“Carl and me. Always.” He sighs. “It got worse after the prom; then, when Debbie got pregnant, she was livid. Said she did it deliberately. So she wanted us to have a baby.”

“What?!” Mark gasps.

“But I said we were far too young. That’s why she dumped me. Didn’t see her again until about three years later. She was working as a nurse. About a year into the marriage, we tried for kids, but we couldn’t, so she looked into adoption. Six months later, she brought the boys home.”

“Is that all she brought home?” Mark questions.

“No, she also brought back a letter. I’ll get it.” He’s not long, we can hear rustling of paper. 

“Why didn’t you report Brian missing? And why is this opened?”

“She opened it the day she came back. She read it, then stormed out…”

“Did you read it?” Mark’s voice is gentle, and tears fill Jack’s eyes. He waits for him to compose himself.

“No, it wasn’t mine to read, I just put it back in the drawer. I thought nothing more of it. A couple of days later, the police arrived, one of her friends, he was asking about Brian. I thought it was odd, as he had never asked about him before. Even when...when he could see the bruises whenever he would come around to play cards with JJ. I said he was at a friend’s house, which was plausible as Brian had many friends. Brandon was more of a loner. For about three weeks, he kept randomly turning up. Wherever I went, he was there. Gave him the same line, out with friends, staying overnight, back in the morning. Then...then the best day of my life happened. He said his name was Keith, and that he had Brian; he was just here for his things, as he was never bringing him back. I told him I was glad that he was safe, but not to tell me where he was. I didn’t want to know, because I didn’t deserve to, besides her friend was still trailing me. He turned up the next day, asking who the guy was. Said he was my cousin who Brian went to stay with for the holidays.”

“Pause!” Brian exclaims. Daph does so. “It was her! She said it, not him!” 

“Said what?” Mom asks.

BRIAN

“That she hoped I was dead. That night, she said it.” I flinch as I remember the smell of the meatballs we had for dinner congealing on the floor where I had thrown them up, after she kicked me in the stomach. “She said she had the kid she truly wanted.”

You want to…” Justin's body is warm against my back as he hugs me.

“Yeah.” I signal Daph. She goes to restart the video, but I clear my throat. “Daph, do you believe him?”

“Just wait.” Daph replies, restarting the disc.

“For years, I heard nothing from her. Then, out of the blue, she wanted a divorce, which I was more than happy with, but then I found out why. Carl was back in town, and single.” He says this with no trace of bitterness. “But by the time she actually located him, he had gotten engaged to his high school sweetheart, who was not her. Didn't see her until a few days back. Fuck of a shock, she asked about Brandon, but not Brian. Once she realised I was telling her nothing, she stormed off. I am not trying to absolve myself from any blame, but that was what happened. For the record, I am glad that Keith, or should I say Kiki, found you, Brian. She was a better mother and father than we ever were.”

“That's the end of it.” Daph shuts the TV screen away. “So what are your thoughts?”

“Can we read it?” Bran tugs gently at the envelope, then they read in silence. “If...if he is telling the truth, then I think I know why she left the city but not the state. Listen, ‘please believe me when I say that it is because I have never, nor will I ever love anyone more than you two and your mother that I have agreed to this.’ Hang on, it says ‘Dear Brian’...”

“Yes, I wrote yours, and Mom wrote Brandon’s.” Dad explains. “The same words.”

“So was it just the adoption papers you found?” I wipe the tears from his face as Bran nods. “I’m sorry you don’t have your letter. You can share mine.” 

“Not just that, where was I when all of it was happening? Where was I? I remember him hitting you once, just once. I told him never to do it again. You hadn't done anything, you were just doing your homework, must have been about ten.” 

“Brandon, this is very important. What did JJ say about Brian?” Daph presses.

“Never said his name to me. She said he was very jealous, he didn’t like me, was always getting me into trouble by lying about me. And for my own safety, she took me away from him.”

“Thereby, doing the one thing we never wanted.” Dad inhales deeply. “Splitting you two up.”

“Ooh, I wanna have a swift word with her!” Gus snaps. 

“What for, Sonny Boy? We’re together again as a family, and that’s all that matters.” I wave him into my arms. “That’s all that matters.”

EARLY MORNING

BRIAN

Bran and I were up most of the night talking. We've agreed that we need to do this.  We’ve said nothing to nobody. Quickly and quietly, we close the door behind us.

“Finally, what on earth were you doing?” We both jump at Jewel’s voice. She is holding the door to Emmett’s jeep open. He is in the driver’s seat.

“How’d you get…” I gawk.

“We stayed at Mel’s.” Emmett replies as he slides his sunglasses on top of his head. “Come on, get in, then tell me the address. Or enter it yourself, Brandon.” 

“No, it’s okay, you can do it. Here.” He shows Emmett his phone. Just as we're about to get in the back, I hear rapping from above. The window opens, and Ben and Justin lean out. 

“Take care, and don't let her manipulate you or feed off your pain!” Justin calls down.

“Are you sure we can’t come with you?” Ben asks.  

“They’re sure!” Emmett replies. “She does not deserve to see the people that make them happy.” 

“We’ll wait for you so we can have breakfast together, not optional.” Justin declares. “And text when you are on your way back!”

“Oh, and Bran, pass by the loft and grab the bath stuff we bought! Justin said we can stay in his wing tonight.”

“Will do!” We both reply, then get in. 

“You know what?” Jewel turns and looks at us as we go down the drive. “As well as the greatest boyfriends, you two have a great son and nephew.” As the gates swing open, standing determinedly, blocking our way, is Gus.

I get out with a sigh. “This is not your fight. Go back inside. The appointment was…” I trail off as Hunter’s car pulls up. Inside, looking equally determined, are Pearl and Jenny. 

“She hurts one, she hurts all!” Gus declares. “So where am I sitting?!”

“With Hunter. Your taste in music is appalling!” I return. When I get back in the car, Jewel silently hands me a tissue.