Brian woke Tuesday morning, sitting up in bed as he subconsciously took an inventory of his body. For more years than he could remember, he would wake up with various aches, pains, and a pounding head. He'd started to keep acetaminophen, a bottle of water by his bed, and usually popped two in his mouth before putting his feet on the floor. He realized that he hadn't opened the bottle of pills for several weeks, actually, since he stopped drinking. He hadn't consciously connected the absence of a pounding headache or generalized body ache to the lack of drinking at night, but now he acknowledged the two were definitely connected. He'd been coming into the office earlier, but he'd attributed that to needing to get to a meeting after work. Now that he thought about it, he could see that it was also a result of going to bed earlier since he was not out drinking until 1:00 or 2:00 in the morning. He was getting more sleep and a better quality of sleep. There were definitely some upsides to sobriety. While he spent a lot of money on booze, he wasn't one to keep close ties on his finances and left that chore to Ted. He assumed if he asked Ted about the state of his financial affairs, Ted would tell him there was several hundred dollars more in his checking account. He smiled at that thought, thinking that he could reward himself with a new suit.
He was jolted slightly when his alarm went off. He hadn't looked at the clock but had woken up independently. The jarring sound was set to rouse him even when he was soundly asleep. While he would never admit to having hangovers, he was beginning to realize that the alcohol he used to imbibe every night often resulted in a morning brain fog. He hit the button on the offending alarm and walked to the bathroom to start his morning routine. After dressing, he went to the kitchen to make his Guava Juice smoothie. Sitting on the barstool at the breakfast bar as he drank the concoction, he scrolled through his phone and looked at his work emails. The clock on the microwave showed 7:45. Brian realized this was easily half an hour earlier than he usually was ready to leave for Kinnetik.
As he walked into the diner, he made his way to the familiar booth in the back. Emmett and Ted were already there and looked up in surprise at his early arrival.
"My my, you're here early," Emmett said as he noticed the restful look on Brian's face. Emmett took notice of people's appearance, although he rarely commented unless things seemed off. Many people thought Emmett was very superficial, but those who knew him understood he had a keen eye for detail and noticed more than he let on.
"Sobriety does that to me. Since I'm not hanging out at the bars in the evening; I get to bed a lot earlier. Of course, it doesn't hurt that I don't wake up with a pounding headache or an achy body," Brian said tongue in cheek.
"I'm so proud of you Brian. I know that it must be hard staying away from the bars. However, are you handling celibacy?" Emmett asked, genuinely curious.
"Honeycutt, who said I was celibate? Just because I haven't been at the bars doesn't mean that I'm not tricking. I can pick up tricks anywhere. The stud of Liberty Avenue may not be trolling Liberty Avenue, but I'm still the stud." Brian bristled at the insinuation that he was celibate. He had a reputation to uphold and to acknowledge that his "stud" status was in jeopardy was unacceptable.
Debbie came up to the table, smacking her gum as usual. Taking out her ever-present notepad, she looked at Brian and said, "You're here awfully early. Have an early morning meeting?"
"Since when does everybody keep tabs on my arrivals and departures? I just happened to wake up early and figured I'd get into the office. Are we going to stand here all morning and chat about my daily routines or are you going to take my order?" Brian said with a little bit of irritation in his voice.
"Okay, don't get your panties in a twist. What will you have?" Debbie took her pen out of her apron and started writing before Brian spoke.
"I'll have an egg-white omelet with dry wheat toast," Brian said as he placed the menu back in the silver holding rack that sat at the back of the booth.
"Of course you will. I really don't need to ask," Debbie said, as she looked at Emmett, waiting for him to order.
"I'll have pancakes and a side of bacon," Emmett said. "I don't order the same thing every day. I like a little spice in my life."
"I'll have two eggs scrambled hard and white toast," Ted said.
"And bring us some coffee. We all need our morning coffee. Although I'm not sure why we want this coffee as is it is usually burnt and overcooked," Brian said, purposefully forgetting to add ‘please' to his request.
Debbie smiled and said, "This isn't some fancy restaurant. If you don't like it you can go down the street and pay five bucks for some fancy latte. I'll get your orders up in a minute." Debbie wasn't fazed by his words, being used to Brian's attitudes.
"You're looking good. I guess staying away from the bars agrees with you," Emmett said as voiced his earlier thoughts.
Ted was surprised that Emmett had mentioned Brian's sobriety, unaware that Brian had told anyone but himself. He knew that he was keeping the information away from Michael and Lindsay, but Emmett was the biggest gossip around.
Brian gave Emmett a sideways glance. He hadn't mentioned his journey into sobriety by name, but the words simply implied it.
"Honeycutt..." Brian said with as much emphasis on the name as he could without shouting. He ran his finger over his lips in a zipping motion and Emmett nodded.
"Okay, I get the message. But really Brian, you are looking relaxed and those fine lines are starting to fade around your eyes," Emmett said, acknowledging Brian's warning and throwing in a little teasing.
Brian ignored the comment, not wanting anyone to overhear their conversation. The diner was busy, even at that hour of the morning and there were always people paying attention to the "Stud of Liberty Avenue".
Turning toward Ted, Brian said, "When we get to work, I'll need those numbers that we were discussing yesterday." Brian hoped that Ted could understand the reference to their conversation yesterday regarding contacting the lawyer. He wanted Ted to tally up the total amount he had provided to Mel and Linds for Gus.
"Sure thing. I should be able to gather that information in less than half an hour," Ted said as he nodded his head in understanding. He was proud of Brian for his involvement in Gus' life and his forethought regarding his continued access to him. He thought Brian was justified in his reluctance to tell Lindsay about his sobriety. He'd been an unwilling witness to her machinations on too many occasions. He'd always wondered why Brian put up with her manipulations, but now understood that he wanted to protect himself against her whimsy regarding access to Gus. While Ted did not want children, watching Brian with Gus made him appreciate what a child could do for a parent.
"So how was your night, Em?" Ted asked, hoping to return the conversation back to more neutral ground.
"Good. Drewsie was home for a change and we spent a nice night in," Emmett said as he got a dreamy look in his eyes. "I never thought my Drewsie would settle down, but, everyone would be so shocked to know how gentle..."
"Stop right there, Honeycutt. I do not need to know about your sex life. It makes my dick soft," Brian said as he rolled his eyes and looked toward Ted to change the subject.
Emmett just smiled at his friend. "I know you are just jealous. Haven't you ever wondered what it would be like to have someone waiting for you at home?"
"No," Brian said. He was grateful that Debbie chose that moment to bring the food. He could concentrate on eating and not continue this conversation.
After eating, he waved Debbie over for his bill. Without glancing at the total, he put down a $20.00 bill and walked toward the front of the diner. Crossing the street, he walked to Kinnetik and went to his office. Ted left shortly after Brian, eager to gather the information that Brian wanted.
About 45 minutes later, Ted knocked on Brian's door and brought in a few spreadsheets. "Here is the information we discussed, Bri. I took the liberty of breaking it down by month and category for those deposits that we know the purpose. In the 10 years that you have been giving money to them, you usually provide over $1000 a month to them. Each time Lindsay has asked for money for a specific purpose, I have noted it in the accounts. On any given month, you have provided $500 for after school care, $250.00 for enrichment activities and another $250.00 for clothing and food assistance. In talking to my sister, her ex only provides $400 a month and she has two kids. You're not even court ordered to support Gus"
"Theodore, I don't need a court to tell me to support my son," Brian said, bristling at the insinuation.
"I know. You have never balked at any request from Lindsay regarding money for Gus. I'm just saying that any judge would have a hard time denying that you have financially supported him as well as spending every other weekend with him. I think if Lindsay balked at giving you access to Gus, she wouldn't have much of an argument."
"I'd still like to talk to the lawyer. If she gives me any grief, I know I will have the law behind me." Smiling at his words, Brian continued, "I would have never thought that I would be having this discussion with anyone 10 years ago. Who would have thunk that Brian Kinney would be concerned about his continued involvement in his son's life?"
"I know, Bri, but you enjoy the time you spend with Gus. I've never said anything, but when you talk about him or the things the two of you do together, your face lights up. No matter what anyone says, he is important to you," Ted said as he placed the spreadsheet on Brian's desk. "I'll leave you to make your calls. I know we have that conference call with Brown Athletics at 11:00, and you'll want time to review their file before the call." Ted turned, closing the door as he left the office.
Brian picked up the spreadsheets and studied them for a few moments. He had plenty of money and didn't begrudge Gus having the best, but based on the numbers, Mel and Linds should have had plenty of money to buy him new cleats every week, let alone pay for clothes that didn't come from Target. He decided that he would be more involved in how the money was spent on Gus. He contemplated cutting back on the money and buying all of Gus' clothing and decided that it was a good strategy. He hated seeing his son in clothes bought at a retail chain when he could easily be wearing higher quality clothing. Also, if he bought all Gus' clothing, he would hopefully put an end to the constant whining that Lindsay did as she complained about the expense of buying new clothes and shoes. It seemed to him that Gus frequently asked Brian for new clothes stating that his mothers balked and complained when he had outgrown his old ones. Happy with his decision, he reviewed the list of lawyers, reviewing Ted's comments about each one. He went on the internet and reviewed a few of the choices and found one that listed working with Same-Sex couples. He didn't need some homophobic asshole dealing with his situation. While he did not usually choose a business based on their social views or their practices in working with Gay and Lesbians, in this situation, he wanted to utilize a firm that demonstrated some commitment to that sector of the population. Choosing one, he called the number of the office.
"Beroes Law Center. How may I direct your call?"
"I'd like to make an appointment."
"May I ask what type of legal query you are seeking? We want to ensure that you are talking to one of our lawyers that specializes in the field."
"I have a visitation concern."
"Do you have a preference for an attorney? All of our staff are experienced in this area."
"My child lives with his mothers but my visitation is at their discretion. I'd like to talk about my rights. I'd like to talk to someone who has experience in this type of situation."
"Our lawyers have over 50 years of combined experience. We understand the intricacies of the law regarding same-sex couples. I have an opening tomorrow afternoon at 3:00."
"That will be acceptable."
"What is your name, sir?"
"Brian Kinney."
"Thank you, Mr. Kinney. We are located at 4054 Penn Avenue. We look forward to meeting with you tomorrow."
"Goodbye," Brian said as he hung up the phone.
Tomorrow, he would hopefully have an answer regarding his rights. Depending on the discussion with the lawyer, he might seek permanent legal protection for his relationship and access to Gus. Now that he wasn't drinking, he did find that he had more time on his hands. Both Justin and Ted had told him he would need to rethink his day to day life and find some meaningful activities. He was beginning to realize that without his daily attendance at Babylon and Woody's he had large blocks of time to pursue other interests. The problem was that he didn't have any idea what those other interests might be. His life had consisted of working and tricking. He hadn't ever thought about other things. He saw Gus on the weekends and had him overnight once a month.
Looking at the clock on his computer screen, he realized that it was close to 11:00 and he had to get ready for his conference call. He would have to think about his life at a later time. The remainder of the day went by quickly and when Brian's phone alarm went off at 6:00, he was surprised that it was that late. He finished the email that he was writing, hit send, and shut down his computer.
He wanted to talk to Ted and provide him with an update. Walking into his office, Ted looked up as he saw Brian in his peripheral vision.
"I was really pleased with the new contract from Brown Athletics. I think we have a lot of potential to expand the contract in the next few years," Ted said. He often sat in on the conference calls with long term clients. It helped him keep a pulse on the financials of the company. He remembered when Kinneitk first started with their advertising and they had almost lost the account when Drew came out of the closet. Brian was instrumental in saving the account and supporting Drew's choices. Now, Emmett and Drew were a long time couple. It always amazed him to think about how their group had changed over the years.
"Did you do anything with the spreadsheets?" Ted didn't want to mention the purpose of the information, even though he knew that the employees at Kinnetik practiced discretion and were always held to secrecy. Due to the proprietary nature of their work, no one could talk about a campaign or other things that occurred in the business for fear of sharing private information. While Brian was an excellent boss and provided a lot of supportive services to his employees, he did not make a habit of sharing any personal information with his staff. As far as he knew, he hadn't shared his sobriety journey with Cynthia, his personal assistant. Although, he was fairly certain that she had noticed some important changes in their boss.
"I looked at your research and did a little more on my own. I have an appointment tomorrow afternoon with Beroes law firm," Brian said. He walked to the window in Ted's office and looked out at the street. Their offices were not in a high rise so there was not a view of the cityscape. Brian had chosen to convert a bathhouse in the gay and lesbian section of town instead of the conventional high rise that many advertising agencies chose. He wanted to stand out and be noticed. He looked outside and saw a few people walking down the street. There was a woman and her partner pushing a baby stroller, a gay couple holding hands and two men talking, appearing to have a heated discussion as evidenced by their active hand movements. He had never really paid a lot of attention to people, but after spending time at AA meetings and talking to Justin, he was beginning to notice his surroundings more.
"Their website boasts that they are familiar with the legal concerns of same-sex couples. Normally, I could care less about their acceptance, but in this situation, I wanted someone who at least says they serve that population." Brian had put the words "Same-sex" in air quotes, even though he knew Ted knew what he was talking about.
"I'm not sure how many situations are like mine. I would imagine that most of their clients are the ones that are married and are wanting to dissolve the union. I have zero interest in marrying a woman or for that matter a man." Brian scowled at the thought of anyone associating marriage and him in the same sentence.
"And, truth be told, I would have told you 10 years ago, I had no interest in being a father. I still don't want to be married and can't imagine being with the same person all the time, but I do want to be involved in Gus's life." He smiled, remembering the movie night they recently shared. He really enjoyed hanging out with Gus, and never saw it as a chore.
"It's ironic. I would imagine that people who drink are estranged from their families, and are threatened with continued access to their children as a result of their drinking. But, here I am and I'm just the opposite. Now that I have stopped drinking, I'm worried that my access to my son will diminish. I'm fearful that his mother will find out about my accident and deny me access to him."
"Really Bri, they are one and the same. For those parents who drink, their families are concerned for their children's safety and want to limit the amount of time they are put in a position where they might get in a car with a parent who drinks," Ted explained. He didn't like contradicting Brian, but in this case, he felt that Brian really needed to admit why he was so concerned about Lindsay.
"I think you're afraid that Lindsay will find out about your drinking and forbid your access to Gus. Lindsay has always known that you drank, but she turned a blind eye since you appeared to be invincible and never had any consequences from it. When she hears that you are attending AA, she should be assured that Gus won't be put in harm's way," Ted said.
Brian listened to his friend but didn't wholly agree with his statement. He held out his hand and touched his finger to the index finger of the other hand. "What you say is true Ted, but she would manage to twist things. She is always looking for some reason to deny me access to Gus. I could see her deciding that I would not be successful in my efforts to lead a sober life. She would throw my attendance at Babylon and Woody's in my face, and try to talk both of us into believing that I could never stay away from them."
He touched his finger to the second finger on the other hand and continued, "If I couldn't stay away, then I would return to drinking and therefore put Gus in jeopardy. That is why it is so critical that I investigate my legal rights. I've known Lindsay for a long time and she isn't to be trusted. I think she likes to hold Gus as a bargaining tool to get what she wants."
"Bargaining tool. I don't understand," Ted said.
"Lindsay has always wanted to be rich and show off her nice things. After looking at the spreadsheets you gave me, I believe that she uses Gus as an excuse for me to supplement her bank account." Brian went over to Ted's mini-fridge and grabbed a bottle of water for himself and Ted. Placing Ted's on the desk, he continued his explanation.
"While I assume Melanie makes a good salary as a lawyer, Lindsay wants to live the life of a country club wife. She has to work so that they can live the way they do, but it is not the high standard that she wants."
Brian frowned as he remembered several country club dinners they attended while in college. She had begged him to attend with her so her parents would stop pushing eligible men at her feet. By that time, she knew she was a Lesbian but hadn't come out to her parents. Bringing Brian, a good looking man and star of the soccer team as her date had placated her family.
"Since she couldn't get me to marry her, and believe me she tried while we were in college, she asked me to father her child. By having my child, she hoped that I would support him and give her additional money to do so." Brian drank the water in the water bottle, finishing it in several gulps. He'd been drinking more water and wondered if that was a result of less alcohol.
"She obviously isn't using the money I give her only for Gus. I looked at the numbers on the spreadsheet you gave me, and with the kind of money I'm providing, Gus shouldn't be coming to me to buy a lot of his stuff. It's her way to have the nice things she wants, but she is about to get a rude awakening."
Ted looked at Brian, raising his eyebrows at the statement. Brian had shared his concerns about Lindsay and his money a few times, but he didn't think Brian would do anything about it. "What are you thinking?"
"I'm going to stop giving her money for clothing for Gus. I take him shopping almost every time I have him. He is always in need of something, and he tells me that his moms balk at buying whatever it is, telling him he just got a new one of XYZ a few months ago. She can't really fight me on that if I buy all of his clothing, including his athletic stuff."
"True. But don't you think there will be a backlash? I've seen her come in here and tell you she needs money for this or that," Ted asked.
"I can always tell her to give me the information and I will send the check. She can't really argue with that one. This way I'm sure the money will go to where she says it's needed and not to her bank account to pay for some new dress for an event. I'm tired of being the bank of Brian."
Ted looked at his computer and saw it was 6:30. "Bri, I hate to cut you off, but Blake and I have tickets for the Opera tonight. Can we resume this in the morning?" Ted clicked on a few X's to close the windows he had open on his computer.
"Shit. I have a meeting at 7:30. I better hustle myself." Going into his private bathroom, he changed into more casual clothing, leaving his suit to hang in the small closet located just off the entrance to the room. He always kept an extra suit and a casual change of clothing at the office. These had come in handy many times.
Brian went to his car and drove to the meeting. He thought about his conversation with Ted. He was slightly surprised at his admittance that Lindsay used him as a bank to fund her lifestyle. He was more surprised by his statement that he wasn't going to allow her to continue. Sobriety was certainly having some unexpected consequences in his life. He was finally doing something to hopefully guarantee his access to Gus, and maybe put a brake on Lindsay using him to fund her desires.
Getting out of his car, he was excited to share with Justin the events of the last 24 hours. He hoped Justin would be proud of him for getting rid of the liquor and for taking control to legally have Gus in his life. As he walked to the room where the meeting was held, he wondered when he began to want someone's approval for his actions.
TBC