Chapter 13

Justin decided he could use a little something to fortify himself before Brinn arrived home.  He pulled out the bottle of whiskey but then decided vodka might be better. He could pass that off as water.  He filled his glass and took a big swallow just as Brinn’s blond head came through the door and started talking a mile a minute, telling Justin minute for minute what she had done with Chantel.  When Lucky appeared and told her he was going to hang out for a few days she was thrilled.

“Where is Gus, Daddy? I want to tell him about last night but I can’t find him.”

“Well, I think he stayed with Shelby last night.”

“Really!  They are back together?  I am so happy!” Brinn ran over and hugged Justin.  “Does Dad know? Can I call him?”

“Sure, here’s my phone.  Maybe it is time we get you your own phone so you can call him when you want to.”

“My own phone, really?”

“I will have to talk it over with your dad.  Tell him I will call him later tonight.”

Brinn called Brian as soon as she was in her room, “Hey, Sexy, I wish I could…”

“Dad, you might want to check who’s actually calling before you start a conversation.”

Brian started laughing, “You are right, Brinny.  I will be more careful. So how was the party? Tell me it was terrible so I don’t feel bad for missing it.”

“Sorry, Dad, it was amazing and guess what?  I think Shelby and Gus are finally back together.  Isn’t that great?”

Brian sighed, “If he is happy, I guess it is great.”

“Dad, why don’t you like Shelby?  She is the best, Dad, and she doesn’t only love  Gus, she loves all of us. Oh, and Lucky is staying here for a while.  He is between jobs so Daddy asked him to stay with us.”

“Daddy did that, huh?”

“Ya, Dad, Daddy is really lonely.  I hope it will help him feel better with Lucky here. Do you know when you will be home?  I miss you so much. Gus does, too.”

“Well, Brinny, I was hoping to be about ready to come back but this silly court case won’t end.  Is your daddy around so I can talk to him?”

“No, I am in my room and he is with Lucky somewhere.  Oh, but he said he would call you tonight. And, Dad, Daddy is going to ask if I can have a cell phone so you don’t start talking lovey dovey to ME!  Please say yes. I love you, Dad.”

“Oh, I love you too, Brinny.  And I think with some restrictions, you can have a phone. Goodbye, Sweetie.  Give your daddy a kiss for me.”

“I love you so much, Dad. Come home soon.” The phone went dead.

Shelby and Gus woke and, after making slow, sweet love they showered and decided to go to the house and tell everyone the good news. As they walked to the house Shelby asked, “Gus, after we talk to everyone, do you think we can spend the day working on the house plans?  It has a whole new aspect now.”

“I would love that, Shelly, and good timing.  Next week I have to turn the plan into the architect so we have to have the walls locked in place by then.”

“Shelby, Gus,” Brinn yelled from the house.  She came running to greet them. “Am I right?  Are you back in love? Are you together again?”

Gus stopped, pulled Shelby close, and bent her backwards as he kissed her.  “YEAH!” Brinn yelled and ran over to hug both of them. “Come tell Daddy and Lucky.”  Brinn grabbed each hand and drug them to the house.

Justin had just filled his glass with vodka again when Gus and Shelby walked in. He got the bottle put away just in time.  “Daddy! You were right! Shelby and Gussy are together. I think we should eat cake to celebrate.”

All four adults laughed had to laugh and Lucky said, “Sounds like a plan to me.” Lucky turned and moved the cake to the center island while Justin found some paper plates left from the night before.  

Gus blinked.  He was sure what he just saw was just happenstance but he could swear his dad just ran his hand across Lucky’s ass.  Lucky and Justin passed out cake and drinks were offered. When they finished the cake Shelby and Gus went back to the cottage.  Brinn asked if she could go along to see where the house was going to sit and then she was going to her studio to work on a project for school.  Shelby was now holding most of Brinn’s classes out there.

The kids were barely out of the house and Justin was behind Lucky  thrusting jeans against jeans. He reached down the front of Lucky’s pants and had Lucky hard almost instantly.  Justin’s free hand went under Lucky’s shirt and began playing with his nipples. “Damn, I wish we had condoms all over this house like we used to. Your bedroom, now.  Are you ready to take it again?”

“Shit, ya!  I don’t know what your secret is but you can make me cum harder than anyone I have ever fucked.”

“Well, guess I better work on seeing how I can improve on it.”

“You’ll kill me if it gets much better.”

“Strip.” Justin watched him disrobe.

“Aren’t you undressing?” Lucky tried to pull off Justin’s shirt.

“No, right now it is all your turn.  In case Brinn pops in the house, I need to be able to go out. Now,” he pushed Lucky back on the bed.  Justin dropped to his knees and positioned Lucky. He pulled Lucky to the edge of the bed so his ass was on the edge.  He then positioned Lucky’s feet so he was spread wide. This way he had access to both Lucky’s asshole and his dick. He spent the next half hour tormenting Lucky to the point of madness with his fingers, his tongue and finally he put on a rubber and, after 30 minutes of blissful teasing Lucky was allowed to cum, which he did violently.  

Justin heard the porch door slam.  He gave Lucky a quick kiss. “It is your turn tonight.”  and he was gone.

“Daddy!”

“Coming, Brinn.”

“Where were you, Daddy?”

“I was talking to Lucky.  Did you get your project done already?”

“No, I was just wondering if I could bring a snack with me to the studio.”  Justin helped her pack a little afternoon snack including a bottle of juice and a bottle of water.  

After Brinn was gone, Justin poured himself another glass of vodka.  He realized he was enjoying the slight buzz he had going. He was also looking forward to seeing what Lucky had planned for him.  If he kept it creative Justin might just keep him around for a while. Brian didn’t seem to be interested in coming home anytime soon.  Thinking about Brian he realized he could call him. Unless he was out partying, he should be done eating dinner now.

When Brian’s phone rang he answered it carefully.  “Kinney,” he answered formally.

“Well, Mr. Kinney, it’s Mr. Kinney,”  Justin responded.

“Hey, Sunshine.  I almost had phone sex with our daughter earlier today so I was just being careful.  I miss you.”

“So did Brinn tell you about getting a phone?”

“Yes, and it is fine with me.  We can put restrictions on it so she can only call family.  Miss you, Sunshine. I…”

“Brian, stop saying you miss me. If you missed me you would be here.  It has been six weeks. Don’t you pay your lawyers enough to deal with this kind of shit. Or is there a reason you don’t want to be here.  Should I ask his name?”

“Justin, come on. You know everything that’s going on here.”

“I do, and I think I had a lot of patience six weeks ago. Let me know when you are coming home. Until then don’t bother lying to me.  I will text Brinn’s number as soon as I have it. Keep in touch with your kids. They still believe you.” And before giving him a chance to respond, Justin hung up.  

‘Sunshine, please don’t be like this’, Brian texted, but when he got no response he gave up.  He walked over to Dan’s for a nightcap.

“Hey, Dan, got a drink for a lonely friend?”  Brian opened the door just as Dan walked out of his bedroom with only a towel very low on his hips.  “Well, it is obvious you still workout daily.” without realizing it Brian had walked across the room to where Dan stood and ran a hand down his chest, stopping just short of the towel causing Dan to shiver.

“God, Brian….”  Dan pulled himself together quickly.  “Help yourself to a drink, I’ll put on some clothes, unless you don’t want me to.” Dan could smell the whiskey on his breath and risked the comment.  “Brian,” Dan put an arm around Brian’s waist and pulled him close. “It’s been a long, long time since…” Dan brought his mouth to Brian’s slowly and when Brian didn’t back off, he took advantage of the situation and kissed him. When Brian responded, Dan’s hand went behind Brian’s head and he took it to the next level.  He crushed Brian’s mouth as his tongue invaded and Brian had no energy to deny him. Justin had just told him to fuck himself. Well, he would rather fuck Dan. It had been a very long time. Brian ripped off the towel and grabbed Dan’s ass, Dan started pulling at Brian’s clothes and once the two of them had managed to strip him Dan took in the full length of him. Brian was as beautiful as he ever was.  

As Brian crushed him against the door Dan took some control.  “Brian, if we are going to have sex, we are going to do it right.”  As Dan led him to his bedroom Brian realized he had never been in here before. It was definitely Dan’s room.  Together they laid on the bed. Brian and Dan were both used to taking charge. After a couple head bumps and uncoordinated moves Brian dropped onto his stomach.

“It can’t be this hard.  Dan, I need a good fuck, but I need to  be in charge. Can you live with that? If not I’ll leave and we will forget this happened.”

Dan reached over and touched Brian’s cheek.  He kissed Brian. “I’m yours. Let me help you get started. With a bit of prodding Brian rolled to his back and Dan slowly began taking Brian in his mouth. It wasn’t long before Brian knew Dan had skills.  Brian pulled Dan up and kissed him and then turned Dan away as he positioned himself and began to enter.

“Slow, please. It’s been a long while since I have, oh god!”  Brian reached around and began sliding up and down Dan’s erection to distract him.  When Brian felt Dan relax, Brian began to move in and out. Soon Brian was pounding Dan over and over and soon Dan cried out and then Brian let himself go.  As Dan laid there recovering, Brian slipped out of him.

“I’m sorry, Dan.  I just can’t…”

“Oh, Brian,” Dan turned and pulled Brian close. “Stay. Nothing expected.  You need someone. Let me be here for you.” Dan stroked Brian’s hair and kissed him sweetly.  “Relax and sleep.” As Dan continued stroking and kissing Brian, Brian drifted off to sleep. “Sleep, my beauty.”  What are he and Justin playing at? It was so obvious they needed each other. Somewhere in the middle of the night Dan woke to Brian kissing him.  The passion in the kiss told him Brian wasn’t thinking of him but Dan didn’t care. By the time Brian was totally awake, Dan had claimed Brian’s dick in his mouth and Brian orgasmed, thrusting deep into Dan’s throat. Dan moved back up.  “I’m sorry, I can’t be who you want, but I am here for you.”

Lucky had managed to slip into Justin’s room and found a few interesting items he brought back to his room.  By the time Justin arrived after putting Brinn to bed. Lucky had set up the toys to one side and as Justin entered he pulled him into his arms.  As he kissed him he began to undo Justin’s pants and then pulled off Justin’s shirt. He already stood in his briefs only. Lucky laid Justin back on the bed and starting at his mouth he was soon working his way to his cock.  As soon as Lucky’s mouth claimed Justin’s cock, Justin began thrusting. Within seconds Lucky drained him and then turned him over. Lucky guided Justin as he put pillows under Justin’s hips raising them to the perfect height and angle.  He started with a small vibrator that sat on Justin’s prostate. As Justin climbed higher Lucky massaged his shoulders. Justin was soon on the edge again but Lucky stopped it just before he ejaculated. Lucky picked up one of the longest vibrator he had ever seen and made sure Justin saw it.  “Are you really able to…..”

“God, yes, use it!”  Justin was so ready to really feel something.  That had to do the job.”

Lucky slowly began to enter him.  He teased him by pulling it out part of the way and then reinserting it farther.  Lucky was amazed as Justin was able to take it all. “What do you want, Justin.”

“Leave it and come here.” Justin sighed but resisted cumming.  Justin moved to his side and kissed Lucky as he guided Lucky’s hand back to the vibrator.  He took the hint and began moving it in and out and then began to roughly slam it in and out the best he could at this angle.  Justin cried out into Lucky’s mouth as his whole body convulsed But as he calmed down, he looked at Lucky and without a word removed the vibrator, stood up, grabbed his clothes and walked out of the room.

The two weeks following his birthday were some of the best days of Gus’ life.  He knew he was with the woman he belonged with. He and Shelby had finished the house design and it was now on the desk of the architect.  Gus had seen more things happening between Justin and Lucky that had him sure something was going on. He wasn’t sure what, however. He knew how hard it was on his dads to be apart and he was also sure both of his dads were drinking more than they should. And maybe most important, he knew they hadn’t talked for over two weeks.

Right after Gus’ birthday, Justin had gotten a phone for Brinn.  When Gus questioned why, Justin just mumbled something about Brian almost saying something he shouldn’t.   He and Shelby had picked the phone up and had the store put blocks on everything except for a few programmed numbers which included her dads, Gus, Shelby, John, her grandma, and Mary and Jim.  She had no access to the internet or even games. They had downloaded a few for her but if she wanted more she had to ask. She was so proud of her phone she didn’t even care how restricted it was.

At this point, Brian had decided he wasn’t coming to California until Justin asked him to.  The court case was still being drug out but at least he felt like the office was again on track.  He was careful about the time he spent with Dan. Everytime he was with him made the guilt worse. After talking to Brinn most nights Brian was fairly sure Justin had been with Lucky since the birthday party. Maybe it was just his imagination.  Would Justin just throw away their marriage, their relationship? Then Brian would feel guilty, knowing this all happened because he had been gone so long.

Shelby and Gus had decided to have dinner at the house so when Gus arrived home from school early he stopped by to see if there was anything he could help with.  He knew Shelby had taken Brinn to the college library to study some old books the library had on display about Native Americans. He had expected to find his dad and maybe Lucky in the kitchen but he found something in the oven but not the men.  He looked in his dads room but it was empty. Gus stood in the hall not sure where to go when he heard a sound he definitely recognized. He walked to the guest room and put his ear to the door. He opened it a couple inches sure of what he would find and he was partially right.  He saw Lucky on the bed. What he hadn’t expected was him being handcuffed, face down while his dad….” He quickly shut the door.

Justin’s head whipped around at the sound.  Shit? He didn’t see who it was but he prayed it wasn’t Brinn.  Without stopping what he was doing, he grabbed the bottle of vodka and took a deep drink. He pulled out of Lucky. “I’ve got to go. Someone was just in here.” He untied one of the handcuffs and threw the key at Lucky  as he pulled on his clothes and was out the door.

By the time Justin got to the kitchen, no one was in the house. He filled a bottle of water with vodka and then stepped out onto the porch to find Gus sitting in the double swing.                                                                                                                                                                                                      

“May I?” Justin nodded to the empty spot next to Gus.

“Are you sure you don’t have to continue screwing my ex.?”

“Oh, Gus, I never thought of him that way.  Does it bother you?”

“I don’t give a flying fuck who Lucky fucks.  I care that my dad, who I love with all my heart and who I know loves Pops with all his heart, is screwing Lucky.”

“Gus, your dad has basically deserted us.  I know he had to stay in New York and I understood that. But was supposed to be two weeks, four weeks tops is now almost to eight weeks and he couldn’t even manage to come to his only son’s birthday.”

“Dad, I’m not a child.  I can deal with Pops not coming to my party.”

“Have you talked to him lately? Who has HE been with? I  know he is seeing someone.”

“The only person he talks about besides people at work is Dan.”

“That would make sense.  It wouldn’t be the first time he and Dan hooked up.”

“Dad they have been friends for years.  That would be like because Emmett was hanging out with you he thought you were….”

“Or our old friend Lucky hanging out here... Gus, we weren’t….I wasn’t important enough for him to come home to his family.”

“Dad, that’s not fair.  I happen to know the case will be done this week. The decision is in the hands of the judge and he had said he would be ready either Thursday or Friday but I also know that Pops isn’t coming back  unless he knows you want him here.”

“Why would I need him here.  With Lucky here….”

“Oh, don’t give me that bullshit.  It was obvious you were getting your physical needs met but emotionally your a mess.”  Gus grabbed Justin’s bottle out of his hand and took a big swallow of what he thought was water. He started sputtering and coughing. “That explains a lot. If you don’t care about Pops why are you drinking yourself into oblivion?”

There was a pause as the swing gently swayed back and forth.  “Brian made his decision.”

“Dad, you decided for him.” He stood up and turned to Justin, “Dad, can you imagine the rest of your life without Pops?  Sharing Brinn? Being empty inside no matter how much sex you get?” He kissed Justin on the cheek, “Clean up a bit. Shelby and Brinn will be back soon and you smell like sex.”  

Justin watched Gus walk away.  He emptied his water bottle and as he stood up the swing bumped his knees and he lost his balance. Next thing he remember, Lucky was at his side.

“Justin, you Ok?” Justin started to sit up but instantly felt dizzy?

“I was getting up and the swing caught me just right and I lost my balance.” He reached up and felt what he assumed was blood.   “Help me up. What time is it? Brinn can’t see me this way.”

Lucky helped him to his feet and led him to the master bath.  “It looks like you could use a couple stitches.”

“I am not going to the doctor for a couple stitches.  You’re a nurse. Can’t you do something? You are a nurse.”

Lucky had Justin sit on a chair. “Stay here.  I am going to get my medical bag.” A couple minutes later he was back with a tote full of supplies.

“Lucky, I need a shower.  Can you help me take a shower before you bandage my head?”

“Let’s try the tub.  You are a little too wobbly on  your feet right now unless you want me to join you.” Lucky kissed Justin deeply.  “I would gladly do that. I mean you did leave me hanging.”

“The tub would be great if you can help me wash the blood out of my hair.” He glanced at the mirror.  “It is a little scary seeing my hair streaked like this.”

When Lucky had Justin in the tub he helped him wash his hair and took a good look at the cut.  “Thank god it is in your hairline and didn’t mar that gorgeous face of yours.” He carefully rinsed Justin’s hair and dried it well.  He put a couple butterfly strips on the wound just as there was a knock on the door. “ Daddy? Can I come in? I want to tell you about my day.”

“Just give me a second, Sweetie.  I am just getting out of the bath and need to pull on some clothes.”  He looked at Lucky, who grabbed a towel and helped him out of the tub.  He made Justin sit on the edge of the tub as he dried him just so he was steadier.  He slipped a robe on him and had him sit on the bed.

“I will stay in the back of the bathroom until she leaves.  Don’t stand up unless you have to. You are still shaky.” He kissed him quickly and moved well out of view.  

“Come in, Brinny. Tell me about your day!”

“Oh, Daddy, what happened?” She gently touched his forehead which was bruising darker every minute.

“It is nothing serious.  I was clumsy and let the swing on the porch bump me and I lost my balance.  I ended up face planting against the pole. Good thing Lucky is here. He put a bandaid on for me.”

She lightly brushed her lips on his bruise, “Poor Daddy.  Does it hurt much?”

“I do have a headache but I better ask Lucky what I should take.  Can you tell me everything you saw at bedtime? I probably should get dressed and check on dinner.”

“Sure, Daddy.  I will tell you all about it when you feel better.  I love you, Daddy. I hope you feel better. Did you tell Dad you got hurt?”

“No!” he snapped to fast.  

“Daddy, is Dad ever coming home?”  She asked sincerely.

“I am sure he will come to see you very soon.You  know he loves you very much.”

“I know, Daddy. He tells me every day when I talk to him.  Daddy, he asks about you everyday, and I know he misses you so bad. I better go so you can get dressed and save dinner.”

As soon as Brinn had left, Lucky came out.  He pulled out some clothes for Justin. “Dress.  I will check on the meal.” Lucky kissed him once as his hand slid into the robe.  Justin sighed as Lucky headed for the kitchen. Justin flopped back on the bed and stared at the ceiling.  He had great kids. He had a guy that would let him do anything sexually to him, so why did he feel so alone.  He wanted Brian. He curled up and fell asleep.

“Dad, hey, you awake?  I hear you hit your head.”

“I must have fallen asleep.”

“Or passed out.” Gus mumbled.

“I had a bad headache from hitting it so I thought I would see if shutting my eyes helped and I must of dozed off.”

“Dad,  you have got to control your drinking.  What if Brinn would have found you or you had really gotten hurt? What can I do for you?  I’ll move back to the house if somehow that will help.”

“I’m fine.  I’ll get dressed and come out to dinner.”  

“Dinner has been done for an hour.  Brinn is asking if you are going to come to tuck her in.”

“Oh,”  Justin nearly choked up but then put on his tough exterior.  “Tell her I am on my way.” He started pulling his clothes on. His head did feel a little better. He looked around the room and finally found a bottle of vodka, taking a couple swallows to steady himself and then he headed to Brinn’s room.  After apologizing to her for missing dinner he lay next to her on the bed. As she spoke she stroked his cheek softly. Before long they were both sound asleep.

Gus found him there and made sure both were covered.  He then walked out and went to Lucky’s room. He knocked and Lucky called, “Come in.”  From Lucky’s tone he was not expecting Gus to walk in.

“Sorry, it’s just me.  Don’t plan on Dad tonight.  He fell asleep with Brinn and I don’t see him waking up.  What are you doing, Lucky? Why are you doing it?”

“Gus, Justin asked me to stay.  He wants me here. I know it is just sex but it is the best sex I have ever had!  Nothing against you, you are great but the experiences your dad has had...every night he comes up with something else.  Most days it takes me a half hour of stretching just to walk normally.”

“Really, Lucky? Do you think I want to hear this? And he is drinking constantly, isn’t he. I know if he wants to take on a lover I can’t do anything about it but please, for his own health, help monitor how much he drinks. I’m worried about him. I’m worried about Pops.  I am fairly sure he knows about you so if you have a job offer you might want to take it.

“I’m sorry this is hard on you.  I don’t want it to be and even if I wanted to leave right now, Gus, he is really messed up. I am not sure I would want to leave you with him right now.  I hope you know I will always watch out for him and Brinn. And, I will try to watch out for the drinking. I honestly didn’t realize at first that he had been drinking it like water, no pun intended.  If I can do something for you I will. If you really want me to leave, I will, but then you are going to have to be here because Brinn can’t be alone with him.”

“Thanks, Lucky, you are probably right.  And I know my dad is probably very good at seducing someone.”

“Let’s just say you inherited things you don’t even realize.  He is amazing in bed. I knew how sweet he was but he is so…”

“I get it.  You can stop now, Lucky!”

“Gus, let me know if there is anything specifically you want me to do.  I’ll do it.”

“If my pops calls, talk to him.”

“I will.  I won’t run from my actions.  I didn’t do anything Justin didn’t ask for.”

“I won’t say I am glad you are here under these circumstances but I am glad it is you, Lucky.” Gus left to find Shelby.

Shelby was in the swing on the porch wrapped in a blanket. When Gus walked out he didn’t notice her at first and she was sure she saw him wipe his eyes.  Softly she said, “Gussy, is everything alright? Did something happen?” Gus dropped down next to her and she took him in her arms wrapping the blanket around both of them.  “What is it, Gussy.”

Gus laid his head in her lap. “Dad’s in trouble.  I mean real trouble. He just passed out in Brinn’s bed and he and Lucky…”

“Ya, I kind of figured out they were together.  What is Brian going to say?” Shelby stroked his hair as he laid there.

“Pops already knows. Deep down he knows.  He isn’t going to come back until Dad asks him to come back.  He doesn’t feel welcome now. They are both so damn stubborn.” Gus’ voice was shaky as he spoke.

“Let’s go to the cottage, Gussy.  Lucky has things in control and you need some sleep.”

Gus sat up and slowly moved toward Shelby.  “Have I told you today how much I love you?”

“You show me everyday!” She placed her hand on his cheek and kissed him tenderly before standing up and offering him her hand.  Arm in arm they walked back to the cottage. They both got ready for bed in silence but once they were lying side by side they started talking again.

As Gus laid his head on  her abdomen, Shelby tried to change their mindset.  “Have you heard from Jamie? I haven’t seen him since the party.”

“He was here for a few minutes the other day.  He is moving out this weekend. He hit it off with one of my classmates and there is room at his place.”  He brushed her top up so he could kiss her bare skin. “I don’t think, no, I know I couldn’t cope with all of this if it wasn’t for you. I love Jamie but I now know the difference between love  for a friend and love for the one that has my heart. And as long as I have you, I know I will never need anyone else. We can face anything together.”

Tears formed in Shelby’s eyes.  She could hear the honesty in Gus’ voice. The love she felt for this man was beyond anything she had ever imagined.  She had learned so much from him and his family. His family might not be what people considered normal but she would take this family over hers anyday and she now knew how much his dads separation was getting to him.  She could feel her stomach getting damp from his tears as they laid like this. She reached down and tilted his head up so she could look him in the eye, “I will always be here for you, Gussy.”

He moved up her body until their lips met  Shelby moved her legs so they wrapped around Gus’ waist, offering herself to him.  He looked deep in her eyes as he entered her. His mouth came down on hers as he moved slowly in and out of her.  There was nothing dramatic or acrobatic about it. It was just love, deep, heart-consuming love. Gus kissed her as they separated and as Shelby looked at him, she saw the little boy deep inside him begin to crumble.  “Come here, Gussy. I will be here no matter what happens. You won’t be alone.” Gus collapsed into her arms and cried.

Shelby woke early and slipped out of the bedroom.  She knew she might be making a mistake. She knew Brian was not her biggest fan but this was for Gus.  She called Brian’s number. Brian was in his office and glanced down at his phone when it buzzed. Shelby.  His first thought was something happened to Gus or Brinn and he picked it up. “Kinney, what’s wrong, Shelby? Has something happened to Brinn or Gus?”

“Brian, something is happening to both of your children.  They both miss you terribly. Brinn is confused why you aren’t here.”

“Shelby, this is none of your business.”

“But you are wrong, Brian.  Gus cried himself to sleep last night wondering if you would come back before Justin drank himself into oblivion.”

“What’s wrong with Justin?  He’s drinking?”

“Brian, he is putting vodka in water bottles and drinking all day.  If it wasn’t for Lucky staying at the house….” She hesitated, knowing she was pushing the conversation beyond where she had planned, “Gus wouldn’t dare leave the house at night.”

“In other words he couldn’t screw you at night. And of course, Lucky is keeping a close watch on Justin each night and probably during the day.”

“Brian, I know you don’t want Gus to be with me and I can deal with that but I am concerned for your family. Why aren’t you here, Brian?”

“It is none of your business!”

“Brian, why aren’t you here?”

“Shelby, what the hell do you want from me?”

“Brian, why aren’t you here?”

There was a pause and then very softly Brian said, “He doesn’t want me there. He won’t respond to me.” The phone went dead.

“Shelly, you out there?  Come back to bed,” Gus’ voice called from the bedroom.

“Coming, Gussy.”

“What were you doing, Shelly?”

“I just got a drink,” she slipped into bed with him again.

He pulled her close, “Thank you, my love.”

“For what, Gus?”

“For being here last night, for loving me, for caring.” As he said this his mouth kissed her cheek, then he kissed her shoulder and then he latched onto one of her nipples as his hand went to find her sweetest spot.  As his fingers slipped in, his mouth continued downward. With his fingers well lubricated with her own juices, he began to work his way into her ass as his mouth began lapping up her moistness and captured her clit. She relaxed as much as she could and pushed out a bit which allowed him to progress.

“Gus, I want YOU inside me.  Please, I want your cock, not your fingers.”

“I know that hurts you so much.”

“Gus, you know the pain and pleasure.”

Gus entered her vagina to get ready and then, propping her legs on her shoulders, he moved slowly and steadily into her tight anus.  He looked into her eyes where she tried to hide the pain she felt but then he began to move and as she loosened up the bliss came across her face. Gus could see the moment she was ready and he began to move faster and with much more force.  As he did so his hand moved to her clit and as he gently pinched it she screamed and every muscle of her body shuttered over and over.

Gus removed himself and pulled her into his arms where they kissed and touched for several more minutes.  “Gus, I have to be honest with you. I called Brian and asked him when he was coming home.”

“I bet he wasn’t thrilled with that.”

“No doubt about that but now he knows what is going on. He needed to know  what is happening with Justin…”

Gus sat straight up.  “You told him about Lucky!”

“Calm down, Gussy, of course I didn’t tell him that.  I told him about the vodka. But he knows about Lucky.  He made that clear. I hope you know I did it for you and Brinn, and Justin.  You don’t deserve this. You need your family back together.”

Gus wrapped his arms around her, “Thank you, Shelly.”

An uneasy normal settled over the vineyard.  Lucky did his best to limit Justin’s drinking but when he stopped drinking he seemed to go into   a deep depression. Lucky finally handed him the bottle. “What can I do, Justin? You can’t just sit here and drink yourself to death.  Even Brinn knows something is wrong with you. Justin, I think you need to call Brian.”

“I am not begging him to come back to me.  He needs to come back and….”

“Beg your permission? Let him know he is welcome.”  That was the last Lucky said. He talked to Gus and Shelby regularly and during the day Justin had started going out to his studio some days. From what Lucky saw the painting was very different than it used to be but it was very compelling.  

Brian spent long days in the New York office.  He was pleased with his new hire and felt sure his business was in good hands.  He spent his nights at home. Most nights he and Dan sat side by side on Dan’s sofa.  Dan would wrap an arm around Brian but most nights little was said. There had been a couple nights when Brian’s need for contact had developed into more and Dan accepted the sex willingly but he was worried about his friend.  Brian belonged with Justin but Justin had quit responding to his texts weeks ago and he was sure he wouldn’t answer if he called. Brian wouldn’t talk to Dan about anything personal and Dan knew if he pushed, Brian would just stop coming over and he decided they both needed each other right now, Brian emotionally and Dan was going to take all the physical contact Brian wanted to dish out.

Shelby and Gus were supposed to be leaving on Brinn’s field trip to Arizona next week.  After talking with Lucky they all agreed it would be good to get Brinn away for a while.  Early on Monday morning Brinn and Shelby got into Gus’ jeep and the three drove away. Justin missed the goodbye.  He had spent the night in the studio, painting and then passed out an hour before sunrise. Brinn, by now, wasn’t exactly sure what was going on but she had begun to look to Shelby and Gus for the support she needed while Justin still managed to spend time with her each evening.  That was his only focus for each day, to be sober enough at Brinn’s bedtime to read with her.

When Justin realized the kids were gone, for a moment he was upset and then he started screwing Lucky in every room of the house.  By Wednesday, Justin slept in his room alone. Both he and Lucky needed a good night sleep. He had actually fallen asleep sober for a change.  He had been too tired to drink after having sex for literally 24 hours straight.

At first, Justin wasn’t sure what had woken him up.  He was still in the room alone. Then his phone rang again.  His first thought was Brian but it wasn’t his ring.

“Who is this? Do you  know what time it is? What time is it?”

“Mr.  Taylor?”

“Ya, this is Justin.  What time is it?”

“I’m sorry, sir.  It’s 7:30 a.m. here.  I’m in Pittsburgh. I was asked to give you a call. You are the son of Craig Taylor, aren’t you?

“Well, if you are asking if he donated sperm, yes, he’s my father.”

“My name is Dr. Williams.  I’m sorry, sir but I am calling to tell you that early this morning your father passed away.”

Justin stopped breathing for a moment.  “Sir, Justin, are you there?”

“Thank you for calling, Dr. Williams.  Can I ask a question? How did he die?”

“He had an aneurysm.  He came in with a headache but there is nothing that could be done.”

“Was he alone?”

“No, he was surrounded by his family. Your brothers and sister were with him.”

“Thank you for the call but I don’t have brothers and I would bet the sister that was there wasn’t mine either.  And when I think about it, I haven’t had a father for about 20 years.” Justin ended the call before he could say something else.

Justin laid there for a few minutes.  He needed to call his mom. Jennifer’s phone barely rang before she answered. “Oh, Justin, you’ve heard?”

“I did.” Justin’s voice was strong and steady.

“Honey, how are you?  Please tell me Brian is there by now.”

“No, Mom, I am not sure if he will be coming back.”

“Oh, Justin, Brinn told me they were on a trip.  Please, tell me you’re not alone.”

“I am perfectly fine, Mom, but Lucky is out here with me.  Dad wrote me off for dead 20 years ago. Why should I care that he died? Did you  know he had a new family?”

“I did.  Those kids are mostly grown now.  I think the oldest is probably in his first year of college.”

“Mom, if you don’t mind, I need to get a couple more hours of sleep.”

“I’ll let you know when the service is.”

“Don’t bother, Mom.  He made it clear I was dead to him.  Why should I care he’s no longer alive? Love you, Mom.  I will talk to you later.”

Justin left the room and went to Lucky’s.  He grabbed a condom and before Lucky even knew what was happening, Justin had slammed into him.

“Holy shit, Justin.” Lucky cried out in pain but soon he was shouting for another reason.”  As soon as he was done, he took Lucky’s cock in his mouth and finished him off.

Moments later they laid side by side staring at the ceiling. “What got into you at this time of the morning?”

“I got a phone call and since I was awake, I needed to screw someone.” Before he could stop himself he went on.  “I hope he was watching me fuck the hell out of you and then giving you a blow job. I hope that asshole died in pain.  I hope he feels like the failure he was. I hope he,” tears poured down Justin’s cheeks by now. “I hope he hurt half as much as he hurt me.”

Lucky was very confused but pulled Justin into his arms.  “Justin, what happened? Who died?” For a moment he wondered if something had happened to Brian but he didn’t think Justin would function at all if that happened.

“My father died.  I can’t really call him my father.  He was someone’s father but not mine.” Justin was silent for a moment, “Why couldn’t he love me?  Why couldn’t my kids know their grandfather? Why couldn’t he accept me for me?” Justin was almost shouting by now. “Lucky, how could he throw me away?”  No more words came, just sobs as Justin cried himself into exhaustion and then sleep in Lucky’s arms.

Lucky dozed off but when he woke again Justin was gone.  He felt a need to find him. Justin had not been in a good place when he had fallen asleep.  He looked through the house. He noticed the liquor cabinet was open as he left the house. He headed to the studio. Before Lucky made it to the door he heard Justin.  He heard things banging around. When he walked in,, the place was in shambles. But when he looked at what Justin was doing, he was stunned.

Justin had four canvases going at once.  He was going from canvas to canvas. All seemed to be of the same person but each one was progressively older.  He would work on a spot on one and then move to the same spot on the next canvas and then the next. Every couple of movements, Justin would stop and pick up the bottle of whiskey.  Since the kids were gone he went back to what he liked to drink the best. In the few moments Lucky watched, Justin stumbled more than once. He had obviously been out here a while. He had never seen the man Justin was painting but if he had to guess it was his father. He sat on the floor, Justin still unaware he was there.  He would stay until Justin collapsed and then put him back in bed.

Brian was sitting at his desk when his cell phone rang.  He looked and saw it was Jennifer. He really didn’t have it in him to talk to his mother in law this morning.  Moments later a text came in, ‘answer your phone, damn it!’

His phone rang again and he answered it, “Jennifer, I really don’t have time to get browbeaten this morning by you or anyone else so make it quick.”

“Brian, I wouldn’t call you at work…” Brian heard the hitch in her voice and he became full of anxiety, “What is it, Jenn? Oh, please don’t tell many anything happened to Justin.  Are the kids alright?”

“Craig died last night. Justin won’t admit it but I know it has torn him up.”

“Oh god, Jennifer, I’m sorry.  I know it has been a long time but he is still the father of your kids. Is Molly Ok?”

“She is.  She didn’t have a lot of contact with him but Craig hadn’t thrown her away like he did Justin.  You need to go there, Brian. He needs you.”

“Jennifer, I hate to be the one to tell you but he is with Lucky.  I know I need to take some of the blame for that but he has totally blocked me out of his life. I only hear things through the kids.  Brinn hasn’t admitted it to herself yet and Gus, well Gus would never say anything negative about him. Unless he asks me I won’t return.  And the kids are out on a school trip right now so it would be a bit uncomfortable with just Justin and Lucky there.”

“What has gotten into you, Brian Kinney. What has happened to the man who took what he wanted?”

“He has learned that others people’s feelings are more important than his own.”

“Brian, my son is as stubborn as you are.  Make him see he needs you. No one has told me but I am guessing he is drinking more than usual.  I’m scared, Brian. Will Lucky watch out for him like you would? He isn’t thinking right now.”

“Jennifer, I love him and I love you but I just can’t….Lucky will take care of him.  I will contact him and make sure he is staying close.”

“That has to kill you,” Jennifer said softly.  

“It does but his safety and emotions are more important than mine. Thanks for calling, Jenn, and I will let you know anything I learn.”

“I love you, Brian. You do know you are my son, too, don’t you?

Brian’s voice cracked as he responded, “I love you too, Jenn.”  and the phone went dead.

As Brian contemplated the call to Lucky he reached for a bottle he had in his desk but then stopped himself.  He needed all his wits about him for this conversation. He pressed Lucky’s information and he heard the phone ring.  It quit ringing and he could hear movement. He then heard a door shutting and Lucky came on the line.

“I didn’t expect you to call me.” Lucky said with a little apprehension in his tone.

“I’m not calling to start anything.  How is Justin holding up? I am sure this isn’t easy on  him.”

“He’s a mess.  He’s painting and drinking a lot.”

“Has he mentioned me at all?”  Brian had to ask.

Lucky hesitated, “Brian, he hasn’t.”

“Do you know if Justin called the kids?”

“He said he wasn’t.  They didn’t know him at all.”

“He’s right.  I will let Gus know but I will tell them to continue the trip.”

“Ok, Brian. I…”.

“Lucky, call me if you need me.  I really….I will respect Justin’s wishes but if he needs me or if you don’t know what to do, you call me.  I will be there as soon as I can get a plane booked.” Brian’s voice cracked, “Take care of him, Lucky, because if you let anything happen to him,”  he whispered, “I’ll kill you.” the line went dead.

Lucky went back in to watch over Justin.  He didn’t doubt for a minute Brian would follow through with that threat.  Brian belonged here with Justin, not him.”

Brian called Gus and told him about Justin’s father.  Gus asked if they should go home and he told them to finish their trip.  He let him know he had talked Lucky and Lucky would call Brian if he felt it was necessary.  He admitted he wanted to be there but if Justin didn’t want him there he wouldn’t stress him out.  Brinn made him smile when she was telling him all about their trip but before she said goodbye Brinn said, “Dad, when are you coming home.  I miss you so much.” He could hear her emotion in her voice.

“Oh, Brinny, I promise I will be home for Thanksgiving.  I love and miss you so much.”

There was some background noise and then Shelby came on, “Sorry, Brian, Brinn needed a hug so I got the phone.  Is Justin Ok?” Shelby understood what this could mean for him.

“He is shook up but he would want you to finish the trip. Take care of my kids, Shelby.”

“I will Brian. I love them, you know.”

“Goodbye, Shelby.”  Brian cut the line.

It had been three days since Justin got the call and as far as Lucky knew he hadn’t slept since then.  He had dozed for a few minutes on the studio floor a few times but that was it. The morning of the third day Lucky convinced Justin to clean up a bit.  He said he would only shower if Lucky joined him. Justin stood under the steaming water as Lucky sudsed him from head to toe. Lucky dropped to his knees and looked up to Justin.  Justin leaned toward him and Lucky opened his mouth. As Justin moved in and out of Lucky’s mouth he started crying, “Fuck you, Craig Taylor, fuck you to hell and back!” Justin grabbed Lucky’s head and slammed in and out of him until he shot directly down Lucky’s throat. As he finished he screamed out. It was almost an animalistic cry. He left the shower with Lucky still on his knees.  

Lucky turned off the water and rushed out hoping he could get Justin to lie down for a few minutes. He had to admit, he was so exhausted he didn’t trust himself not to fall asleep and lose track of Justin and right now he couldn’t trust him to be alone.    Justin was pulling on some clothes when he got into the bedroom. Why don’t we lie down for a little bit. We can go to my room if you don’t want me in here.

Justin pushed him backward and as Lucky landed on the mattress, Justin landed  next to him but within seconds, Lucky was sound asleep. When he woke up two hours later, Justin was gone and through the window he could see him in the studio.  He dressed and walked out to the door to go out and realized how cold it had gotten. He grabbed a jacket and when he got to the studio he found Justin in just a pair of shorts with the door wide open.  It was freezing in the room. He rushed back to the house and found one of Justin’s old sweatshirts and sweatpants. He ran back to the studio.

“Justin you need to put on more clothes.  It is too cold out here.” Justin didn’t respond but he let Lucky pull the shirt over his head and then he stepped into the pants.

Lucky looked at the paints.  The quartet of pictures changed every time Lucky saw them and he swore this man that had just died was coming to life on the canvas and from the young man to the old man the expression from loving and kind to hard and uncaring, just how he had treated Justin.

Once Justin was backed in his own world, painting, Lucky called Brian.”

It was about three in the morning and Brian laid in bed with Dan. He heard his phone and grabbed it.  “Lucky, what is it.”

“Brian, he needs you.  I have tried everything. He needs you.” Brian was already pulling on his clothes.   

“I’ll call you as soon as I know when I will get there.

Brian looked at Dan.  “I have to go as soon as I can get a plane ready.  I have most things packed. Damn, why didn’t I have a plane on stand by?”

“Brian, I have a plane ready for you.” He took Brian’s hand and kissed it.  I will call them to get a flight plan in place. You grab your bags and I will call my car to pick you up.  30 minutes enough time?”

Brian stopped long enough to hug Dan and kissed him, “Thank you, Dan.  I hope you know I love you. You are an amazing friend. You are an amazing man.”

Dan held onto Brian a second longer, “I love you, my friend.  I will always be here for you. Now go grab your bags. I can send anything you can’t get in time and I will watch for the car.”

Before Brian knew it he was on his way to save Justin, he hoped. Just before the plane took off Brian texted Lucky that he was on his way and gave him an estimate on the arrival time.  He took a sleeping pill hoping he could get some sleep before getting there. Justin needed him but he might need Justin worse.

When Brian landed he called Lucky.  “I should be there in half an hour, “ Brian let him know.  

“I will be leaving as soon as you arrive.  I think it will be better if the two of you are alone.  I don’t want to be a distraction.”

“Lucky,” Brian said, “I can’t believe I am saying this,” there was a pause,   “Thank you for being here for him.”

“Brian, he belongs to you.  No one else will make him happy. He will be in the studio. I will bring your bags in before I leave.”

As the car drove up the driveway Brian took a deep breath.  Could he deal with rejection if that was Justin’s reaction? He wasn’t sure but this was where he belonged. He hadn’t felt this much fear in a long time.   Lucky was on the porch when he arrived. The men nodded at each other and Brian walked around the side of the house and down the path to the studio.

As he approached the closed door he peered in the window.  His heart bled for him. He knew he hadn’t made a noise but Justin started turning around and Brian ducked out of sight.  The paintings were amazing but Justin looked terrible. He was being pulled to him so Brian opened the door. He needed to touch him but he had to let Justin come to him.

Brian opened the door and had to stop himself from rushing over to him.  He shut the door softly and waited for Justin to turn around. Without turning  around Justin said, “What are you doing here?”

“Lucky called me.  He was worried about you.”  Brian took a step toward him. “I am worried about you, Sunshine.”

“You obviously didn’t think I needed you last week or last month or..”

“Justin, darling, you dad was so wrong. You are…”

“Don’t talk about him.  I don’t ever want to talk about him again.” Justin wouldn’t let Brian touch him.  He kept painting. He was now focused on his father as a young man. Brian noticed a little boy in the background.  Justin was going back and forth between the young father and his little boy. His hand began to shake too much to paint.  Brian started to approach him and reached him just as the paintbrush clattered to the floor and Justin’s whole body began to crumble, just as Brian could reach him.  He pulled his trembling husband to him. Justin’s arms came around his neck holding on as the tears began.

“I loved him and he loved me once.  What did I do that was so wrong? I couldn’t change who I was.”  Justin continued to cry.

Brian held him tightly as Justin sobbed in Brian’s arms. Brian picked him up like he would Brinn, if she scraped a knee, and carried him to the sofa. He sat down and held his Sunshine. He rocked him a bit as his tears began.  His heart broke for this man who loved with his whole heart. How could a father just turn away from his son?

Brian began kissing Justin’s tears, cooing words of love as he held him close.  “Brian, was I really such a failure?”

“Oh, Sunshine, he was the one who failed.  He failed your mom, your sister, and most of all he failed you.  Oh, darling, I can’t imagine living without you. It was all his loss.” Brian kissed Justin’s cheeks again and then his lips found Justin’s.  Both felt a jolt go through them and Justin repositioned himself so he straddled Brian’s lap and he crushed Brian’s head against the sofa, as he got up on his knees and started unbuttoning Brian’s shirt.  His hands were everywhere.

“Please, Baby, Please, show me I’m worth loving.”

Tears again ran down Brian’s cheek.  “Oh, Sunshine, I am not worthy to show you that because you are far to good for me, You are the best man I know.  You are the best son, the best father, oh, and the best husband anyone could ask for. I have failed you so often.”  As he talked their kisses were deepened and Brian had pulled off the sweatshirt he had put on yesterday morning.

“Baby, I am sure I stink.  I need to…”

“You need to let me smell you, to touch you.  I have missed you so badly.” Brian began working his way down Justin, worshiping his body.  He inhaled Justin’s scent as well as tasted his salty skin. When he arrived at the waistband of the pants he removed them and slowly took Justin in his mouth. After his tongue danced around it for sometime, Brian raised his head and looked at Justin’s face, “May I make love to you, darling?”

“Oh, please.”

“Shall we go inside to…”

“No, I want it here, I want it now. I want it to hurt.  I want to feel alive!” As Justin spoke, Brian positioned him over a table that held Justin’s supplies and he looked  for some kind of lubrication. Brian saw some oil on the table and poured it over his cock as he forced his way into Justin.  He cried out but Brian kept going knowing Justin would want that. Brian realized Justin was very tight. He obviously hadn’t let Lucky in.  Brian’s heart soured. He was the only one that was allowed inside him, body and soul. Brian had lost his composure and thrust over and over making Justin cry out but now they were cries of pleasure, and Brian hoped, and joy.

As Brian came deep into Justin he pulled Justin against his chest as, with one hand, he reached around and held onto Justin and stroked him until he came with a great shout.

Justin rested his head against Brian’s chest.  “Why did you stay away so long, Baby?”

“Because I’m an idiot.” He turned him and kissed him.  “I want to hold you against me, Sunshine. Can we go to our room?” Both men dressed enough to get to the house and they fell into bed naked.

Brian held Justin close while Justin told stories about his dad in the good times.  “Brian, do you think it’s my fault that Mom and Dad divorced?”

“Oh, Sunshine, it was his inability to accept what he didn’t understand.  Can you really see them together now? Jennifer and Tuck are good together.  He would have stifled your mom too much for her to be happy. Do you remember what Debbie used to say? ‘Mourn the losses for they are many but celebrate the victories for they are few’ or something like that?”

Justin nodded.

“So you need to mourn this.  And maybe it isn’t really the fact that he died but it is  the life he missed out on with you and your family. But, Sunshine, you have had many victories.  You are the most amazing artist and we have the best children ever.” Brian kissed him and wiped all traces of tears away.  “I am so sorry. Business should never have taken priority over my family.”

“Baby, I’m sorry I lost sight of why you were there.  I think I was just feeling insecure. I can go weeks up here without seeing anyone but family.  Maybe I need to find something else to do.”

“Sunshine, we can talk about all this some other time.  I think right now,” Brian’s hand skimmed down Justin’s body and he located his flaccid cock.  It instantly jumped to life. “I want you inside me. I have missed the way you make me feel, if you are up for it.”

Justin glanced at his now nearly erect dick.  “It appears I am up.” he smiled a small, sweet smile. “I lied, Baby, when I said I  didn’t want you here. I was just too proud to tell you how much.” He rolled Brian over so they were face to face.  He pulled Brian’s top leg onto his own hip. After a little change of angle he entered Brian and then thrust in one strong movement. At the exact moment he crushed Brian’s mouth. He didn’t move  for several minutes. The men’s mouths were saying everything without saying anything. Justin eventually began to move slowly but powerfully and together, looking into each other’s souls, every cell in both of their bodies exploded at once. They held onto each other as their bodies rode wave after wave of joy together.