During the meeting with Brown, Justin was reminded how irresistible and intimidating Brian was during a business meeting. He had seen him in action when they used to work together, but that had been so long ago.

It was evident that Brian could smooth talk anyone. He knew the fine details about Brown’s life and business and was able to adapt their offer to his needs in a way that made Justin's head swirl. When Brian involved him in the conversation by introducing him as the new talent in his Art Department, Justin found out he could still blush like a school boy.

While he stammered through various ideas for the campaign with Garrett’s help, Brian leaned back in his chair, watching Justin proudly.

At some point, after their second course, Brian touched Justin's thigh under the table.

“You’re doing great,” he whispered into his ear.

“You think?” Justin seriously doubted he made an impression.

“Trust me. I know Leo, and he loves your ideas.”

Justin could feel his heart swell, and the compliment made him feel more confident when Brown’s next questions came.

After dinner, Brian suggested they all head to a bar down the street. Brown was the first to decline the invitation, saying he wanted to spend the rest of the evening home with his wife. Susan and Garrett were game for only a few drinks.

Justin discovered that his Art Department colleagues were actually fun, and not all that serious as he had thought. Susan took it upon herself to tell Justin all about everyone in the department, and it was all damn good advice despite the scowl on Brian's face. Justin wanted to know more about his colleagues’ personalities to be able to know who to be friendly with and with whom to keep it professional. It was enough that some of them hated him by default because he hadn’t even been in the office for a week, and the boss was already taking him on the trip to Chicago.

Brian and Garrett found common ground in classic rock music, but every now and then Brian interjected, correcting some fact Susan got wrong. He was the kind of boss who cared enough to spend time and get to know his employees.

“I’m going for a refill,” Brian said after a while.

“I’m good. When we finish, we’re heading back to the hotel,” Garrett said, meeting Susan’s eyes. She nodded in agreement.

“Another beer?” Brian touched Justin's shoulder.

“Make it a vodka for me,” Justin replied.

“Mixing drinks?” Susan gasped, once Brian was gone.

“This was a light beer.” Justin pointed to his bottle. “I’ll be fine.”

“Brian seems to like you,” Garrett said out of nowhere.

“Oh, yeah?” Justin had no idea how to reply. Was it meant as a professional compliment or a statement of the obvious?

“He barely knows you, and he brought you on this trip, now he offered to buy you drinks.”

“You know that’s how you became friends with Brian,” Susan chided Garrett. “You came home drunk, telling me the boss wasn’t as bad as you thought.”

“And you couldn’t wait to point out that I told you so.” They shared a smile, making it painfully clear for Justin that they were together. He had been meaning to ask Brian if Susan and Garrett were in a relationship, but he never got around to do it.

“I’m not holding your hair if you throw up the whole night again,” Brian said, amused, placing the glass of vodka in front of Justin.

“I can hold my drinks, thank you very much.” Justin bristled, acutely aware their companions were paying close attention.

“Since when?” Brian laughed loudly.

“Since I’ve learned from the best.”

“Ha! So you two know each other from before,” Garrett exclaimed, as if he had solved some complicated puzzle.

Brian choked on his gulp of beer. Justin slapped his back, shooting Garrett a strained smile.

“We haven’t seen each other in years. I recently relocated back in Pittsburgh,” Justin explained, wrapping his hands around the glass in front of him.

“This explains a lot,” Susan agreed.

“You just said it was normal for the boss to get drinks with the new employee,” Garrett muttered.

“Well, I’ve changed my mind.”

Brian met Justin's confused look, shaking his head.

“Justin was my intern at the former company I worked at,” Brian told them.

“Oh, so that’s how you knew his talent,” Susan said loudly. “Because it’s not every day that such a talent walks through the door.”

“He’s also—” Justin grabbed Brian's arm, squeezing it, warning him not to say more. Their colleagues didn’t need to know about their past.

“We better head back. Don’t stay out too late. We have to meet with Brown at nine,” Susan warned them, getting up.

Garrett joined her, and they left with their arms wrapped around each other.

“I was about to tell them that you paint. What did you think I’d say?” Brian asked, amused.

Justin shrugged, finally dropping his hand. “I’m afraid for you, Brian. We have to be careful.”

“Stop worrying. No one will know.” He leaned closer, but Justin ducked out of reach, glaring daggers. “Fine, be like that. See if you get any when we get back in the hotel room.”

“I know we’re in a different city, but I’m still worried someone is going to see us.”

Brian touched his bottle of beer to Justin's glass. “To us!”

Justin smiled. “To us!”

Three glasses of vodka later, Justin had stopped fidgeting when Brian touched him. He was leaning into Brian's shoulder, one hand holding Brian's hand and playing with his fingers, and the other hand firmly glued to his glass.

“We met in Japan. Eric and I. He was a familiar face among strangers, even though I didn’t know him. You know? I used to feel so lonely, even though Han was the best host to ever exist.” Justin sipped from his vodka. “I had a great time there. All I had to do was paint. Rural Japan kept me occupied, inspiring me every day. Then I had a show in Tokyo.”

“I had no idea you stayed in the countryside,” Brian said quietly, masking his surprise at Justin talking about his time spent away.

“Han had an apartment for me in Tokyo, but I didn’t use in the first year. I preferred the quiet the country provided. You’ve been to New York, you know how insanely packed it can get. Multiply it by a hundred and you get the correct picture of Tokyo.”

“That sounds incredibly…”

“Panic attack inducing?” Justin supplied in a hitched voice. “Shit. I knew why I wanted to stay in the country, but the show had to be held in the city.” Justin downed his glass, staring into it for a long time. “The show kept me busy, but during a break, I looked around at how many people were in the gallery and I felt like I was suffocating. So I went to the rooftop for some air. That’s where I saw the people below milling around in all directions despite the late hour. It hit me out of nowhere.” Justin placed the glass back on the table with a trembling hand. “That’s how Eric found me. He’d come out for a smoke, and stumbled upon the panicked artist.”

“Did he touch you?” Brian asked in a gruff voice.

“Sorry?” Justin blinked in surprise.

“During your panic attack. Did he touch you?”

Realization at how much Brian knew him made Justin wrap his arms around Brian's waist, snuggling closer. It didn’t matter they were in the middle of a bar.

“No. He kept his distance, lighting his cigarette, then he started talking about the view, the weather, the culture. He inched closer as he talked, and soon I found myself answering back, my breathing settling. Then he asked if I was the famous American artist.”

“A smooth talker, huh?”

“He had his moments.” Justin shrugged, untangling from Brian. “I need another drink if I’m going to tell you this.”

Brian was out of his chair before Justin could blink. During the short wait, Justin knew it was the alcohol that gave him the courage to open up. All he had talked to Brian about during their lunch meeting the other day had been meeting Eric in Japan and how he played the role of Justin's agent and sometimes boyfriend. Then he had told him about some of the cities hehad visited, and only about that.

“Here you go.” Brian placed a neat vodka in Justin's hand. Justin noticed Brian had upgraded to whiskey from beer.

“So where was I?”

“What’s his face pulled you from a panic attack.”

“Eric. His name is Eric,” Justin mumbled. “After a while of talking about home and where we were from, we returned to the show. He kept praising me and offered to become my agent. I knew that I’d lose my accommodations with Han if I agreed. When I had agreed to go to Japan, I promised Han to never sign a contract with any agent during my stay. But the things Eric told me opened up a new world of opportunities.

“At the after party, we continued our conversation over sake. We ended the night at his place, kneeling side by side in front of his toilet. It was a night to remember.” Justin shuddered, making Brian laugh. “In the morning, we parted ways. I went to the apartment Han had for me, and after a good sleep, I thought over Eric’s proposition. I stayed in Tokyo for the following week, meeting with people who wanted to know me after the show. When Han called to ask if I was staying in the city or returning to the farm house, I told him I was grateful for everything he’d done, but I’ve found another opportunity. He warned me about Eric, probably he’d seen us at the party. But you know I never listen.”

A smile tugged at Brian’s lips.

“And so I moved into Eric’s place. He lived on the outskirts of town in a traditional, small house, near Tokyo Bay. It had a gorgeous view. Anyway, we kept a professional relationship, with me spending my time painting and Eric promoting me. Then he asked if I’d like to visit other parts of Japan. That’s when we started a road trip of sorts. We explored the whole world. After Japan came China and some parts of India, Singapore, then we went to Europe where we spent at least a couple months in each major, important city. I insisted on heading to Africa, but we only visited Egypt, Morocco and Tunisia.

“We returned to the States fourteen months ago. I had a spot in a pretty big gallery in Soho. We had a decent life. I’m saying this because it was nothing fabulous. His place was small, but more than enough for the two of us.”

“When did you start fucking?”

“I think we were in Berlin? Or Frankfurt? Not sure. We had one too many beers, and back in the hotel room… one thing led to another and we ended up in bed. It scared me how natural we acted the next day, and that neither of us freaked out when we held hands as we walked down the street or when the following night we ended up in the same bed again.” Justin shrugged, sipping from his glass. “I guess we already knew each other after so much time spent together, and having sex was the next natural step.”

“Did you love him?” Brian raised an eyebrow.

“I wouldn’t be so hurt if I didn’t more than like him, but love? No. I know what love is, and what I felt for him was nothing compared to what I feel for—” Justin stopped abruptly. As intoxicated as he was, he could still think clearly.

“Me?” Brian checked in a rough voice.

Justin chose to empty his glass instead of answering.

Brian linked their fingers, squeezing tightly. “I already told you over lunch how Evan returned into my life at the best and worst moment.”

“I see you have history with him. You never mentioned him.”

“There was nothing worth mentioning. Evan was my first boss. He left the company to Ryder when he got a job opportunity in New York. It’s true, we had a quite unorthodox relationship, but I was young and stupid back then. Evan was the first man I truly felt attracted to. The others were a means to an end.”

“And now?” Justin whispered, staring at their fingers. His eyes were glued to the golden wedding band on Brian's finger. “Do you still feel attracted to him?” His voice shook, and he hated himself for it.

“As in I don’t find him repulsive?”

“As in you’d sleep with him,” Justin said, meeting Brian's startled eyes.

“I…”

“I can tell you’re fucking him.”

Brian clenched his jaw, looking away. “After we decided to go through with this charade, we ended up at my place. Shit.” He pulled his hand away, running it through his hair. “There’s something you don’t know about my relationship with Evan. No one does.”

“It’s not only a front, it’s the whole deal?”

“No! Stop assuming.” Brian exhaled loudly. “He’s a top.”

Justin snorted. “So? You fucked tops before.”

“No, Justin. He doesn’t bottom. He never has from what I know.”

“You’ve got to be kidding me!” Justin stood up, but lost his balance due to the copious amount of vodka he had ingested. Brian was quick to grab him before he ended up sprawled on the floor.

Brian steered him toward the door, chiding him hotly. “You have no right to act like a jealous queen! We broke up, remember? This marriage was supposed to be fake, but I’m being watched. I can’t very well go to the backroom of Babylon to get off.”

“No, but you’re smart enough to find a workaround. Call them to Kinnetik, hire a male maid, or something, anything! Not this!”

“Why? Because you disapprove of someone else fucking me?”

“Because you so easily accepted this, basically becoming Evan’s pussy boy when you loathed the mere thought of rolling over for me!” Justin shouted, stopping outside the door of the bar.

Brian glanced around, always concerned about who might eavesdrop. “First, I’m no one’s pussy boy! Second, I never loathed rolling around for you. And last but not least, it’s my goddamn life! It’s not the best situation, but it is what it is.”

“What the fuck, Brian? Where are your balls? You never used to be so afraid to show who you are or speak your mind!”

“You’re making a scene. Keep your voice down,” Brian hissed, pushing Justin in the general direction of their hotel.

Justin huffed, wrenching from Brian's grip. He walked in long strides, muttering to himself.

The bar was a few blocks away from the hotel, and they arrived fairly quickly due to the fast stride imposed by Justin.

In their hotel room, Justin snatched a pillow off the bed and dumped it on the couch. Then he threw himself down, closing his eyes. The room seemed to spin faster than he expected.

“Come to bed. We’ll sleep if you refuse to do anything else.”

“After learning the nature of your relationship with your husband, I refuse to sleep with you! I won’t become your much-needed release when you can’t get what you want from your stupid marriage!”

“Would you stop, already?”

“No! I might be drunk, but I’ve never thought clearer than now. Think about what I just said. Sleep on it.”

Brian brought one of the blankets and threw it over Justin's dozing body, while he went to take a shower.

Justin wasn’t exactly wrong. Brian was surprised that he hadn’t thought of an alternative way to find his pleasure with his usual tricks when the dooming cloud of marriage loomed over him. He had taken the easy route, choosing to consume the marriage. He had known who he was bringing in his bed, and bottoming wasn’t the end of the world. He had done it with Evan before, but he still had his side trick in the backroom of Babylon back then.

If he could fit some tricks in his daily schedule somehow, without being caught by the prying eye of those guys trailing him to check if he and Evan were keeping their part of the deal, Brian thought maybe he could live with the marriage.

If he could convince Justin that he wasn’t Brian's itch to scratch, but so much more, Brian was sure his life would be close to perfect.

He went to bed that night, determined to show Justin what he meant to Brian, and that he needed him in his life.