When they arrived at the manor, Justin stood outside for a few minutes, admiring the house. He’d forgotten how beautiful it was.

“I still can’t believe you bought this house for us. And you kept it, even after I left.”

“I used to come here after you went to Japan.” Brian lit himself a cigarette, looking up at the manor. “It was my private retreat. I couldn’t get rid of it.”

Justin wrapped his arms around Brian's waist, simply taking in the moment. “Is everything working inside?”

“If you mean whether there’s running water or not, the answer is yes. The electricity is sometimes a problem, especially if the weather is bad. And there’s no gas.”

“What about food? I’m kinda hungry,” Justin admitted in a small voice.

“Just a second.” Brian placed the cigarette between his lips, pulling his phone out and dialing the closest takeout delivery company. “Hey, Danny! It’s Brian. Could you place an order for my usual for two?” He nodded to whatever Danny answered. “Good. I owe you. See you soon.”

“What was that?”

“That’s Danny – the only delivery kid who didn’t get lost on his way here. He even brought the food warm, which earned him a big tip.”

Justin laughed. “I can imagine it’s hard for the delivery boys to find the address.”

“That’s why I asked Danny for his number after the third time he got here in time and with warm food.”

“Did you come here often?”

“Sometimes I spent only a few hours here, other times, I stayed here for days. The longest I disappeared without telling anyone was three years ago. It was around my birthday, and it hit me that I was turning forty. Then darker thoughts invaded my head, because I can’t think of my birthday without thinking of your prom.”

It was the first time Brian had brought up Justin's prom in such a casual tone.

“Oh. I never thought about it like that.” Justin hugged Brian tighter.

“I spent seven days here. My phone’s battery died by the end of my first night here. There was a storm and it rained for days, hence the electricity problem.”

“I bet you had everyone worried sick!”

“When I stepped into the diner the following Monday, Debbie started crying while hugging me so tight I feared she’d crack my ribs. The boys were just as relieved to see I was alright. They thought…”

“You’d done something stupid,” Justin finished the sentence.

They walked to the front door. While Brian unlocked the door, Justin remembered the first time Brian had shown him the house. The same eagerness consumed him as they stepped inside.

Justin explored the house, something he hadn’t done thoroughly in the past. Brian left him to his own devices, while he sat on the sofa, entertaining himself with his phone.

Justin started with the upstairs, and nearly got lost. There were so many rooms, some had furniture, others didn’t, but Justin fell in love with the round room from the corner. There was Brian's Barcelona chair and a stack of books. He was tempted to stop his exploring only to stay there and enjoy the potential of the room.

Before leaving that room, Justin closed his eyes, imagining himself painting in that room. It could have been his nook. He shoved the melancholy thought away, closing the door, and resumed walking around.

The only bedroom with an actual bed and dresser inside was the only room that looked lived in.

A pack of cigarettes was sitting on the nightstand. There were dirty socks and a balled-up t-shirt at the foot of the bed. More books sat on the dresser, along with a deodorant spray. In the bathroom sat Brian's toothbrush in a glass.

Justin left the room with tears in his eyes. He refused to allow dark thoughts to invade his mind, but there were so many what ifs that he felt like he was suffocating.

When he made it back downstairs, he discovered a large sunroom adjacent to the sitting room where he’d left Brian. The tour stopped in the kitchen, which was furnished with modern appliances but vintage looking. There was an old cast-iron cook stove, and Justin almost wished there was gas so he could test it. The island counter was made of black marble and above it hung frying pans and an assortment of utensils.

Justin opened cupboards at random to find food that he knew Brian didn’t usually eat, like peanut butter, cookies, and there were some granola bars and a bag filled with nuts, raisins, almonds, peanuts, and pistachios.

There was a loud knock on the door, and Justin bumped into Brian in the entrance hallway. Their eyes met briefly, and Justin could see Brian was startled by the look on his face. Justin could only guess what his face showed.

#

They sat at the kitchen island to eat the food. Justin was impressed that Brian hadn’t ordered Thai or Chinese food, which used to be his favorite. Instead, they had two casseroles with beef and mashed potatoes and a salad on the side.

Brian opened two beers he had in the fridge, to complete their meal.

“This is good,” Justin said between bites. “Really good.”

“It’s nothing special. Though, wait for dessert.”

“Is that what we call it now?” Justin teased. He rubbed a foot against Brian's calf.

“I’m talking about actual dessert, you perv!”

“Hey! I never know with you.”

Brian chuckled, accepting the footsie war.

“So, how are we doing this?” Justin asked, once he finished his meal. He leaned back in his chair, watching Brian chew the last of his beef.

“This… arrangement?” Brian checked.

Justin shrugged. “Whatever you wanna call it.”

“I’ve been thinking about it. I guess we can text each other, or call.”

“And if the other doesn’t answer within the hour, they can’t make it.”

Brian nodded. “I also expect you to go out and have fun. I don’t want you to wait for our next rendezvous.”

“Woo. Fancy words.”

Brian smiled. “Dessert time!”

“You’re awfully excited for sweets. What happened to you?”

Brian grabbed a pint of ice cream from the freezer and two spoons. “Let’s go upstairs.”

“I was expecting some exotic dessert with the way you were going.”

“Have you tried this flavor? Pecan nuts and caramel. It’s my favorite.”

They walked upstairs, and Brian stopped at the master bedroom door. He met Justin's eyes, jerking his head for him to follow. Brian opened a pair of French doors Justin hadn’t noticed, which led to a small balcony.

There was a sofa and a small table holding an ashtray. Brian threw himself on the sofa, and Justin joined him. They shared the ice cream in silence, looking out at the landscape.

Justin snuggled into Brian's side, closing his eyes. Brian wrapped an arm around his shoulders.

“We have to solve this mess.”

“There’s always the option to move to Antarctica and change our names.”

“I’m thinking something more realistic, like having my lawyer work his ass off to prove to the city that I’m not the bad guy. Then I can divorce Evan.”

“Getting a penguin for a pet in our igloo sounds more realistic,” Justin mumbled into Brian's chest.

“Would you stop being so damn pessimistic? This is all new. I’m trying to adjust to all the changes in my life, and you know how I hate change.”

“If I hadn’t come back, would you still fight to divorce Evan and go back to your life?”

“Would we have ended up married with two point five kids and a white picket fence if you hadn’t left?”

“Brian, I’m being serious!” Justin said, hotly.

“So am I,” Brian answered, narrowing his eyes at Justin. “Look, I don’t want to fight with you.”

Justin looked away, sighing loudly. “If you want to get home at a reasonable hour, we should do this.”

He got up, making his way inside the master bedroom.

Brian followed him, catching Justin's elbow. “We don’t have to fuck. I want Britin to be the place we meet to be together, and not always in a sexual way.”

Justin stared at him in surprise. “Okay. Though, if you want…” He stepped closer, sliding his hands under Brian's dress shirt. “Only if you want to.”

Brian snorted. “Is there a time I don’t want you, Sunshine?”

“I missed hearing my nickname.”

Brian pressed his lips to Justin's. “My Sunshine,” he whispered, before kissing him deeply.

They undressed slowly, taking their time in caressing each other, each rediscovering the other. Brian brought Justin to the brink of release while preparing him, but stopped when Justin arched his back, mewling loudly.

“I can still extract the most glorious sounds out of you,” Brian noted, amused.

Justin shifted his ass, grabbing Brian's wrist. “Fuck me! I need you.”

Brian ripped a condom open, unable to wait any longer, either. When he slid inside Justin, his body dictated a slow pace, which wasn’t what he had in mind. But he hovered over Justin's body, their hands clutching at either side of Justin's head, while they made love.

Perspiration covered their skin as they kept up the slow dance, moaning in each other’s mouths.

The first to find completion was Justin, arching his back and getting his dick trapped between their sweaty bodies. Brian held Justin's hips in his lap as he thrust several more time, throwing his head back and coming with a strangled cry.

He fell on top of Justin, exhausted.

Justin ran a hand through Brian's hair, smiling. He decided to bask in the moment, and not think of their complicated situation.

“Did you say there’s running water?” Justin asked after a while.

“Wanna shower?” Brian pulled himself up, and out of the bed.

“I’m all sticky and gross.”

“You look thoroughly debauched.” Brian laughed, taking in Justin's naked glory and his stomach and chest covered in his own cum.

“I can’t believe I used to skip showering after we fucked.” Justin shuddered, joining Brian on the way to the bathroom.

“You loved to smell like me.”

“I… Don’t have a good comeback. I do love the way you smell.”

“Even now?” Brian raised a brow, as he adjusted the temperature in the shower stall.

“Especially now – I liked to think that you smelled like a man.”

“I am a man.”

“You know what I mean.” Justin touched Brian's back. “I was still a kid with baby fat on my stomach.”

“You had a great body. Trust me. I wouldn’t have touched you if you didn’t look hot,” Brian answered seriously. “And fuck, you look amazing now.”

“I just follow a healthy lifestyle and I use the stationary bike a lot. There was a time I got on that thing just to get my thoughts in order for what I had in mind for a painting.”

“Did you get to the basement?” Brian asked, inviting Justin inside the stall with a wave.

“No. I didn’t even know there was one.”

“I turned it into a gym.”

“Now I know what you’ve been doing while locked up in here.” Justin laughed.

Brian picked the soap, immediately going to soaping Justin's back.

“For someone who doesn’t live here, you sure do have a lot of practical things.”

“The thought to move here has crossed my mind more and more in the past few months, but then…”

“Sucks.” Justin twisted his head to see Brian's sad eyes. He reached backwards to cup Brian's jaw. “It will be fine. I have this feeling.”

“I hope so.”

#

Justin let himself in Daphne’s apartment close to eleven at night. The laptop’s glow in the dark living room showed that Daphne had forgotten it was open. It was odd how it hadn’t gone to sleep.

There was a blanket bundled up against the side of the couch, and when he approached to close the laptop, the blanket moved.

Justin wasn’t proud of the girly scream he let out, but his heart stopped for a second.

“You promised me movie night. You didn’t even call to cancel, when I tried your cell, it said you were out of range.”

Justin was surprised to hear that. Brian's phone had worked just fine. Maybe it was time to change providers.

“I’m sorry.” He sat next to her, staring at the laptop. Set as the wallpaper was a picture of Daphne and Justin smiling at the camera. It had been taken on one of her trips to New York when he lived there.

He felt like a lousy friend for letting her down.

She leaned into his side, placing her head on his shoulder. “Huh.” She sniffed his neck. “You weren’t at Babylon.”

“Freak.”

She sniffed again, then pulled away to glare at him in the darkness. “I know that scent. Are you kidding me right now?”

“Double freak.”

“Justin, this isn’t a joke!”

“If you want to give me a lesson on morality, we’ll have to reschedule for tomorrow. I’m tired.” He made to get up, but she kept him down.

“You listen to me, mister! You’re playing with fire!”

“We’ll be careful. Now, can I have my arm back and go to bed?”

She huffed, releasing the grip she had on his bicep. “I expect details!” She called after him.

“Triple freak!” Justin fired back, laughing.