MEL

At least Lucas told the truth. The money was available three days after the meeting. Which was just in time, since Gus and Ian filed for custody right after the lynching Lucas held. David wasn't thrilled at all, not only did he have to pay me, but now he was responsible for Michael's hospitalization. I told him to do what I did with Lindsay and toss that responsibility into someone else's lap. As far as I was concerned, Michael screwed me over so I no longer cared what happened to him. 

It sucked that even with the money David and Michael owed Jenny I couldn't afford someone like Gabriel. I still needed to be careful until the shit from Canada blew over. Unfortunately, the guy was determined to publicly humiliate me. He couldn't do much else since he couldn't sue me in Canada now that I was back in the US. 

I looked around the tiny waiting room of the attorney willing to see me. The woman didn't even have someone to answer her phone, which wasn't ringing anyway. She came out of her office when I came in, saying she just needed to deal with a few issues for her other clients and would see me in a few minutes, before going back into her office. I'd looked up a little about her, and found out she was close to my age and had a decent track record before she moved to Pittsburgh, she also strongly advocated for mothers. So I was willing to wait, even when it seemed like there wasn't a real reason for it. I was getting perturbed when twenty minutes went by, but continued to sit there wondering if she was just trying to convince me I wasn't her only client. I got up and went to her door, only to go back to my seat when I heard her tell someone she'd get back with them.

"Sorry, sometimes this job feels like counseling for my clients. Would you like a drink or something before we talk about what you're here for?" She asked smiling.

"I would have liked it better if I hadn't had to wait half an hour to get your attention," I told her. Seeing the smile leave her face I realized pissing her off wasn't a good way to start out, "Sorry, I'm just really worried," I told her.

"I can understand that. It's never easy to have someone trying to take a child from you," She said, walking me into her office.

The place was pristine, not one file on the desk. Which didn't make me comfortable since even the most organized lawyer's desk at least had a few files laying around. She sat down, pulling out a notepad and pen and just looking at me.

"What?" I asked.

"I'd like to start with you explaining the situation first and what obstacles we might have to face, then I'll ask questions when I need to since I don't have any information from you on why the suit was brought forth. Normally I want my clients to send me the information ahead of the appointment, so I can prepare," she told me.

"I wasn't sure my son was really serious about this, since until recently he's never questioned my fitness to parent him or his sister. His partner suggested I get my life in order and give up my daughter to them, since Ian is always on Gus' side in everything, no matter what the situation is. It all stems from Gus being angry at me about a situation with his biological mother. He also doesn't like that Ian and I have problems with each other. My objection to Ian has always been that I don't understand what he saw in Gus, who was only nineteen when they got together, while he was thirty-one. Ian and Gus have no clue on how to raise a teenager. Jenny is only jumping at this because Gus will cater to her whims, and as of right now she doesn't want to live with me. Like all teenagers she doesn't like the rules she is expected to follow. I think she sees the freedom Gus had with his father- being spoiled and able to do anything he wanted. Which to any teenager would look better than a mother with rules. I don't feel he's a good example for his sister." I told her.

"Wasn't Gus was raised by you?" She asked.

"Yes. But I also had to share custody with his biological father, who let Gus run wild, ignoring anything I said about Gus' behavior. His father, Brian, seemed to reward him for not listening to me," I told her.

"What bothered you about Gus' behavior?" she asked.

"He went out of his way to do things I didn't want him to. I didn't feel he was ready to be on his own when it was time for college. So he went to his father, who bought him an apartment and paid for his college, when I felt it was better for Gus to stay with me while attending a college closer to me. It didn't matter what I said, since his father, Brian, encouraged him just to spite me. It's something that happened throughout my relationship with Gus' mother- Brian undermining me," I told her.

"He's also done this with your daughter?" She asked.

"He really hasn't had any involvement in Jenny's life and I'd like to keep it that way," I told her.

"Then I don't see why Gus' father would be a concern when it's Gus who is asking for custody. What is the reason would Gus wants to do this?" She asked.

"Gus found out his biological mother didn't abandon us the way I led them to believe. In my defense, at the time it seemed better to tell them she left than to tell them that she ended up in a psychiatric hospital and didn't remember her life with us or with Gus and Jenny. It might have been a mistake, but at the time I was dealing with suddenly being a single parent. Gus doesn't see it the same way. He thinks I lied out of revenge for my wife cheating on me," I told her.

"How is Gus related to you?" She asks.

"My ex-wife, Lindsay,is his biological mother and I had him together with the help of Brian. I didn't approve of the choice but my wife wouldn't consider any other way, and at the time I wanted a child enough to give in. My only real problem at the time with Brian Kinney was that we didn't get along and have never agreed about his interference in my relationship with Lindsay. He saw Lindsay's issues as my fault and likely told Gus he blames me for what happened to Lindsay. I wouldn't put it past him to convince Gus to blame me too," I told her.

"Why would they blame you for her mental illness?" She asked.

I thought it over, knowing I couldn't make it sound the way Gus was going to try to make it sound, before telling her my version. "I need to explain the things that led up to why they would see my actions as the reason she ended up needing to be institutionalized. My ex-wife met an artist at the gallery where she worked. They ended up having an affair, and we broke up when she admitted it to me only after I'd figured it out. We kept the break-up between us, at least I did, she told Gus' father. Eventually, Jenny's sperm donor, Michael Novotny, found out and sued me for custody, saying he didn't want his daughter raised in a broken home. I couldn't get Lindsay to understand that she didn't have rights to Jenny since we broke up. She went to Brian Kinney and he hired Gabriel to make Michael and me look as bad as possible in order to give Lindsay what she wanted. We were given shared custody, which wouldn't have happened if Lindsay hadn't cheated on me. Which I'm only telling you to explain why they would see it as my fault. I planned to move on with my life without Lindsay, only to end up having to share a house with her since we owned it jointly. Then the bombing at Babylon nightclub happened and we ended up getting back together. I didn't want to keep repeating the same mistakes and convinced her that in order to have a fresh start we needed to move. It was also because we were scared after what happened. We got to Canada and once again I found out my wife was keeping something from me. I was angry, the way anyone would be after finding out she was pregnant with a child from the affair that destroyed our relationship just recently. I didn't want the child as a reminder and made sure she knew how I felt. Michael felt the same way since this was affecting Jenny's life. We both made sure she understood how we felt about the situation. She left when I told her to get rid of the baby, or else. I just meant our relationship was over. How Lindsay took it was her own fault," I told her.

"I'm still not sure how they blame you." She commented.

"The way they view it was that Michael and I mentally abused Lindsay until she broke from it. I can't say we were nice to her over the situation she caused, but to say we abused her to the point she lost her mind..." I said, hoping she heard the skepticism I left at the end of the sentence.

"Do you think Gus believes it and that might be his reason to be concerned for Jenny's welfare?" she asked.

"There was an incident recently that he'll likely try to use. Let me start out with the fact that I'd been stressed with things that happened in Canada with my job and trying to figure out where Jenny and I would go. Michael and his husband didn't want us in Pittsburgh, and living near Gus in New York wasn't an option since his partner and I don't get along. Jenny didn't want to live with my parents, since they're strict in comparison to her other grandmother, who would lets Jenny walk all over her. I hoped my son would for once support me, but instead of realizing he should be loyal to me since I was there all his life, he's acting as though I'm the only one to blame for everything..." I stopped when Carol held up her hand.

"What happened? We can talk about why after you tell me." She told me.

"Jenny stood toe to toe with me, calling me a liar and saying that I didn't deserve any respect. Her grandmother just stood beside her and I snapped and slapped her. It shocked me since I didn't realize I did it until after it happened. It wasn't something I've done before. They treated me like I was some sort of monster, instead of understanding that it happened because Jenny provoked me," I told her.

"Was there a report filed about what happened?" She asked.

"Jenny refused to file any charges but her step-grandfather did have it documented. Carl is a police officer with Pittsburgh PD and only walked in after the fact. Deb and Jenny made it out to be worse than it was, and I just felt like I couldn't defend myself when I did something so out of character for me. He kicked me out of the house and kept Jenny. Which at the time was probably for the best since I needed to clear my head," I told her, hoping I sounded remorseful in her eyes.

"Anything else you can think of?" She asked.

"Jenny isn't going to sing my praises, and it's likely they'll try to say I'm only fighting them to have access to the support I get for Jenny. I recently lost my job and ability to practice law in Canada. I do have an inheritance which I've had to use a substantial amount of recently for Jenny and I to have a home. I will have to use the support for both of us to live on, at least until I'm able to clear up the issues that resulted from an unhappy premier client I was assigned. There's also an issue with Jenny's father, who just recently ended up under psychiatric evaluation." I told her as she stopped writing to look at me as if to say ‘are you kidding?'. "Michael is more interested in playing games than in Jenny's welfare. He wanted attention, and thinks acting crazy will get him the attention he wants," I told her.

It took her a second before she said anything, as if she wasn't sure where to go with my case. 

"It would be a good idea if you find gainful employment of any kind. It would help dispel the argument that you only want to keep her to keep the support money. The other thing we need to talk about is having character witnesses. I suggest you avoid her biological father since there are obvious issues we'd end up having to fight. While I can understand why Gus' father was an issue for you in the past, it's Gus and his partner we need to focus on since they're the ones suing for custody, not Gus' father. I'm only mentioning it because the truth is he's irrelevant to the case," she told me.

"I understand that, but Brian is a big influence in Gus' life and it shows the kind of influence Gus could be on Jenny," I argued.

She ignored me and continued on with what she felt I should be doing. "I also would advise you to consider therapy, since it will be brought up and we want to show you acknowledge what you did to your daughter as wrong. I only want to add a few things to think about before we begin what is going to be an expensive and lengthy process if mediation doesn't work to solve this situation. I'm assuming you aren't willing to agree to anything short of them dropping the suit for custody?"

"I won't give them custody of Jenny." I told her, getting irritated that she saw me as the problem.

"I'm going to be honest with you since nothing I'm about to say should surprise you with your background in law. With a case like this you aren't going to walk out of this clean, it's going to get dirty and things are going to be said that will likely end any relationship you have with your son. Your life is going to be laid bare for your children and everyone else in the room, and judged in the worst light. You need to think about how you'll look in comparison to Gus and his partner. Jenny is also a big concern since due to her age her opinion is going to weigh heavily on the outcome. You have to see how hard this case will be if they bring up even half of what you've told me. I think you should really think hard about how this will affect your relationship going forward with your daughter. Since in the end that should really be the biggest concern for you. Understand, I'm only saying this because it's going to be an issue. It's better to leave your issues over your son out of this, since it could raise questions of your ability to control your children." She told me.  

"Like I said, I was dealing with his father's constant interference in all the decisions I made concerning Gus," I told her.

"Which really has nothing to do with Jenny since he isn't the father and wasn't involved in her life. The only thing that matters is proving Gus is unfit or that he couldn't support Jenny without outside help. Which is something we should discuss. How does Gus plan to support his sister? Is he employed or will he need the money you're getting to support her? Does he have a place to live that the courts will find acceptable? Also, other than your issues with his father, is there anything about Gus' life that courts will find questionable about his fitness to raise his sister?" She threw at me, waiting as I floundered since she wouldn't like the answers to those questions. 

"According to Gus' partner they won't need any help to support her. Right now they live in a three bedroom apartment, which is in a secure building. Gus works, or plays at working, for his father, but his income combined with his partner's would look better than my situation. I really don't know much about Gus' life since I didn't agree with how he wanted to live it. His partner, Ian, is a psychiatrist, and from what I know is well respected. Right now my job situation is dependent on whether the issues from my last job continue to follow me now that I'm back in the US. While I'm reliant on the support for both Jenny and me, it's not like I'm using it any differently than  the way any parent raising a child would. I have faith the courts will agree that as Jenny's biological mother, I should be the one raising my daughter, not her barely legal brother who's still in college and letting his lover support them both. I know my situation isn't the best it can be, but I'm doing the best I can for now," I told her.

"If they win against you, then it doesn't matter who is the breadwinner, just that their financial situation can support Jenny's needs as well as theirs. It's going to come up that you are reliant on your daughter's support, while if your correct, your son and his partner are willing to forgo using it. Another issue will be your mental wellbeing, and the stress you're under right now. Regardless of whether you were stressed or not, that won't be an excuse. Any court or mediator will question whether it could happen again," she told me.

"So, you're not willing to help?" I asked, getting angry that she wasted my time.

"I'm just telling you it won't be easy when everything you've told me doesn't look good for your case. It's going to come down to why she doesn't want to live with you, and if she is considered competent to make decisions on her life. I'm more than willing to help, but I'm also not going to lie to you, it's not going to be easy when Gus sounds more stable than you do," she told me.

"This wouldn't be happening if I hadn't had to deal with that asshole my firm made me take on," I mumbled, getting up.

"I doubt there's a lawyer alive that hasn't had to deal with a client they didn't like. I've never let it have any bearing on doing my job," she told me. 

I got to my car, just standing there feeling cold and alone. I didn't like hearing what she told me. Only, nothing she said wasn't something I wouldn't have told a client. But I also knew she was telling me we were fighting a losing battle. Gus could offer Jenny more, and it didn't matter how I tried to spin it, they'd turn me into the kind of mother Hunter's mother was- using my kid for what it got me. I shook off that thought, got in my car and told myself I wasn't anything like that woman. 

MICHAEL

This therapy shit wasn't the pain in the ass I expected. The doctor Alex assigned to me let me discuss my favorite topic- Brian Kinney. At first I was a little ticked off that Brian hadn't been in on our appointments, but for once there wasn't anyone telling me I was delusional or that Brian didn't want me. Instead, Dr Banes listened to me tell them all about why Brian should be with me, and how perfect our life together would be. I wasn't sure at first why Alex said Dr. Banes was going to be my primary doctor until we resolved everything, until he explained that Dr Banes dealt with people in my situation. Alex left me with Dr Banes and I wanted to know what exactly he wanted from me to get Brian here so we could stop him from screwing up my life.

"I just need to understand why you think Brian wants the things you do?" He told me.

"He's told me since we were fourteen that he did," I told him.

"Since I don't know what he told you, how about you tell me your history with Brian and we'll discuss it?" He asked me.

"Like what?" I asked.

"What was your life like before you met Brian?" He asked.

"It pretty much sucked. My ma constantly embarrassed me in front of everyone. She didn't get that the last thing I needed was her butting in constantly, making everyone think I was some mama's boy. Then, other kids made fun of the way I dressed and the fact that I like comics. I didn't have the things other kids did, like the right clothes or the big things everyone wanted. Like I said, it sucked and I hated everything about it," I told him.

"When you met Brian that changed?" he asked.

"He rescued me from bullies and made it so other kids left me alone. He was like a superhero coming into my life," I told him, smiling.

"When did your feelings for Brian change from friendship to more?" He asked.

"Shouldn't Brian be here to discuss this with us?" I asked.

"He will in a couple of minutes, once we talk and I understand the situation from your perspective." He told me.

"He's here?" I said, wanting to get up and make him come in here.

"Yes. And since you gave us your permission he's listening outside the room. I wanted to give you the opportunity to explain why you feel the way you do, and why it caused you to undermine your other relationships. What was so special about Brian that you let it rule your life?" He asked me.

"It would be easier to explain if you saw him," I told him, excited that Brian was finally here.

"I have. So you were attracted to him based on his looks at first?" He asked.

"Everyone is when they first meet Brian. But they couldn't get close to him the way I did. So for me it was different, Brian wanted me around and made sure everyone knew it. No one was allowed to treat me with anything but respect, or they dealt with him," I told him, watching for Brian to come in the door.

"He wasn't like that with your other two friends... Ted and Emmett?" He asked, looking at his notes.

"He didn't even like Ted, and Emmett annoyed him. They really owe it to me that he bothered with either of them," I told him, not liking the idea that he even put Ted and Emmett in the same category as me.

"They owe you that Brian didn't treat them like everyone else?" He asked.

"Of course they do. Which pisses me off now. My friends should be here supporting Brian and me," I told him.

"Why don't you think they are supporting you?" He asked.

"Because HE FUCKING CAME ALONG. Everything in my life changed the day the fucker stood under a fucking street light. I could tell things had been getting different with Brian. He had been getting bored with everything. It was my chance to show him that a life with me would change that for him. He knew I wanted more and ran, scared because of what we could have, straight to that blond twink," I told him, agitated.

"What was your friendship with Brian like after he met Justin?" He asked.

"Brian still put me first, and only put up with HIM. I made sure Brian put the kid in his place every chance I got. It got ridiculous the way the kid followed us around. I even told him as nicely as I could, not to pin any hopes on Brian. I warned him what a selfish asshole Brian was, but the kid was like everyone else, thinking they were so special that Brian would change for them. HE didn't get it, Brian made promises to me and nothing and no one would get in our way. The blond asshole tried, but I finally showed him," I told him.

"How did you do it?" He asked.

"I just made sure HE saw the truth, that Brian would always put me first. HE cheated on Brian, I was there picking up the pieces trying to make everything better for Brian. I knew I needed to keep HIM away from Brian. Brian can't see what I can, that HE was never good enough for him. When he finally left Brian I told him to stay out of our lives. Which HE did for a while, but then he managed to worm his way back into Brian's life. I blame Ben for that, since I couldn't devote my time to keeping that fucker away from what belonged to me. Then Brian started acting like we didn't have anything in common anymore. He was spending all his time with Lindsay and Justin, and acting like I didn't matter as much as they did. It's why I agreed to have Jenny with Mel, to give us something in common again. Brian and I could be fathers together, raising our children. Then the opportunity to get rid of HIM became available, HE even fucked that up for me," I told him.

"How did Justin mess that up?" He asked.

"I hoped he'd stay in California when we got offered the chance to make our comic into a movie. I kept telling Brian about all the opportunities Brett Keller was offering HIM, and Brian started to let him go, even canceled a visit to go see HIM. I practically danced with glee when it looked like he wouldn't come back and glue himself to Brian." I told him, getting agitated.

"How about we talk about why you believe Brian belongs with you," He said, which calmed me, I hate talking about when the asshole came back, moving in with Brian.

"He told me all our lives that he loved me, he said ‘always have and always will'. Since you don't know Brian the way I do, it was his way of telling me even though we weren't together the way we should have been, I would be the one when he was ready," I told him as Brian and Alex came in. "Brian would never go back on the promises he makes," I said. Not happy when Brian sat across from me instead of next to me.

BRIAN

One thing that really changed for me when I left Michael behind was there was nothing left in me to feel sorry for him. Growing up he never had to worry about walking through his front door to meet a fist- Deb and Vic loved him and did everything they could to make up for the things he didn't have. It's the one thing I never liked about Michael, the way he took what people offered, then expected more than they could give him. It's what made Justin different from Michael; Justin didn't ask for things. Justin let me be who I was, not seeing the reputation, just me. I didn't have to be anyone but Brian for Justin, he didn't live his life through me the way Michael did. Justin forced me to be the man I could be. Michael on the other hand acted as though I was nothing if I wasn't ‘Brian Fucking Kinney'. Only I stopped being that Brian when Justin came into my life. Not that I would admit to anyone that one night changed my life. Michael saw it and spent the next several years working to get Justin out of my life. It was then I understood Justin when he said there was nothing left in him to give a shit about Craig or Mel. It's how I felt when I left Michael behind, and it only grew stronger as I listened to Michael acting as though he was doing me a favor getting rid of Justin, when it was all about Michael once again, thinking I owed him for letting me into his home and life. I honestly didn't care about the reason Michael was the way he was, only that he hurt the people who I love in a way I never loved him or anyone else.

"Tell them Brian, that when you make promises you keep them," Michael demanded, breaking me out of my thoughts.

"What promises do you think I made to you, Michael?" I asked, watching his mulish expression when I didn't call him Mikey.

"That we'd be together. Remember? Two old queens in Palm Springs?" Michael told me.

"Actually that sounds good. One day I'll have to see if I can convince Justin we should live there when we are both ready to retire," I told him.

Michael crossed his arms, looking like a petulant child. "He doesn't deserve what I've worked all my life to have. I stood by you all your life, not him," He told me.

"How? By offering excuses for me? By driving me around when I was too drunk to get behind the wheel?" I asked.

"I also had to deal with throwing guys out, and putting you to bed because you were too drunk to find it. You know why I did it? Because you needed me to show you I was there for you like you promised me. HE doesn't get what I spent my life waiting for." He told me.

"Justin gets whatever he wants from me. But in this case he's conceding to what I've wanted since the first time I proposed to him. Something I wouldn't have ever wanted with you, since it only reminds me of everything I hated about my mother," I told him.

"Brian, I did those things because I love you, and no matter what, I know you love me. I know you better than anyone else ever will. Maybe you thought I stopped but I never did and never would... it's not possible to even believe you don't feel the same way I do. You slept with me. It had to mean something to you, when it meant everything to me," Michael told me.

"What part of it meant something? The part where I woke up trying to get away from you, or the part where I told you we'd made a mistake and I didn't want you?" I asked.

"He should have been gone a long time ago, but no, you kept him around, hurting me over and over again! I did everything to make it so you could see that we were meant to be together. I didn't even want to marry Ben, but you wouldn't stop me! Even David was all your fault, for leaving me. But you had to know I would have let him go for you. We have a chance to have all the things I dreamed of for us now. Don't do it! Don't marry HIM! I'll be whatever, whoever you need me to be... anything... just tell me what it will take for us to be together," Michael begged.

"There isn't anything that would change the fact that I don't love you like I love HIM, and honestly only ever loved you as a brother, and nothing more. Justin has nothing to do with it," I told him.

"We were fine until HE showed up in our lives," Michael argued.

"Michael, if I had wanted you I wouldn't have waited fourteen years, or until I was too drunk to remember my name to do anything," I told him.

"You knew it was me that night," Michael protested.

"Did you?" Alex asked me, interrupting.

"I knew he came home with me, and when I woke up we were naked together the next morning. I really don't remember much about the whole night," I tell him.

"You told me I was the one you wanted. That everything else was a mistake that got in our way." Michael tells me.

"I said that when we got to Babylon, about Justin. It was when you handed me a drink and said to stop wasting my time on Justin when I had people in my life who would do anything to make me happy if he hadn't gotten in the way. If you're going to lie, make sure it's something I don't remember about that night, which would be you," I contradict him.

"I gave up everything for you, and this is what I get," Michael whined, instead of admitting he lied.

"You feel Brian owes you something for everything you did for him?" Dr Banes asked.

"He doesn't get to give what belongs to me to that interloper. Can't you see Lindsay and Justin are just manipulating you? That kid was only to get you to deal with Lindsay's mess for her, like you always did for that conniving bitch. You need to stop feeling like you owe HIM when you could be happy with me," Michael ranted.

"Brian, I think we have enough. You can leave," Dr Banes told me.

"What? He can't leave until he realizes I'm right. I won't let HIM get my dreams, do you understand me Brian!? HE doesn't get you... you don't get to be happy without me! I'll make sure HE never gets you," Michael threatened, as I got up to leave.

"What do you mean by that Michael?" Dr Banes asked, blocking Michael when he tried to get up and stop me from leaving.

"If I can't have what I want that fucker isn't going to get it either. I'll finish what Chris started," Michael shouted, as Alex stops me from going after the asshole.

Alex followed behind me, waiting until we were out of the room to say anything. "I know you didn't want to do this, but I needed Dr Banes to hear and see Michael's reaction to you." He told me.

"If Michael comes near Justin, you can tell him I promise to show him what Chris did wrong and actually do it right," I told him, walking out the front door into Justin's waiting arms.