BRIAN

I wasn’t sure what I’d planned when everyone left tonight. I wasn’t thinking rationally, and likely would have just ended up in a fight with Mel. When Ian texted that he wanted me to help him deal with Mel, I knew it would be better to let him lead any discussion, because Ian can keep a cool head. He’d managed Mel for the last three years without letting anything she did or said affect his relationship with Gus. Justin used to be able to do the same, and at one point made it so Mel and I could be in the same room together without fighting. Those days were gone because Mel couldn’t see what Justin did had nothing to do with who was right or wrong between her and Lindsay. My only worry was that while Ian normally dealt with things rationally, this was hurting Gus and Jenny. In that way he’s like me, no one hurts the ones he loves.

“You seem calmer now,” Justin says, getting into bed.

“I’m taking Emmett’s advice and not trying to deal with everything on my own. I almost went to find Mel, but Ian wants us to do it together,” I tell him.

“I plan to stay completely out of this one,” Justin tells me.

“Why?” I ask.

“There’s nothing left for me to say to her. It’s not in me to forgive her for using what we all knew, against you. The only one I wanted to make peace with in this entire fucked up mess was Gus. In hearing her vilify me to Jenny when there wasn’t any reason, Mel did the one thing I thought only my father accomplished, me finally giving up on her. I’m no longer going to beat my head against a wall over people who expect me to be someone I’m not,” Justin tells me.

“There was a time when you and I wouldn’t have dealt with something the way we did with Gus,” I mention.

“You think it means something that we didn’t in this case?” He asks.

“Maybe, maybe not… but I don’t want us to let it be how we deal with things anymore,” I tell him.

“In what way?” Justin asked.

“We try to take everything on ourselves, and forget we have a family who we can trust to help. You shouldn’t have had to deal with everything with Lindsay alone,” I tell him.

“Lindsay wasn’t responding to anyone but me,” Justin reminds me.

“We narrowed her world leaving only you for her to rely on. Her memories of you were good ones, but the same could be said for Emmett,” I tell him.

“What about Ted or Deb?” He asks.

“Ted was Mel’s friend more than Lindsay’s, but Emmett was pretty much everyone’s friend. Deb, being Michael’s mother, would have been a problem, but Lindsay might have responded to her if Deb knew everything that happened,” I tell him.

“What’s really bothering you tonight?” Justin asks, proving he still could read me.

“We aren’t perfect, but one thing that has always come first is doing our best for our children. I never expected to be a great father, or even a good one, but it was important to me that Gus had everything I didn’t think I could do for him,” I tell him.

“I don’t think there’s anyone who could say they did everything right, just that they made the best decisions at the time. My mother wasn’t always right, but she got more right than she did wrong. It’s how we tried to raise Patrick, and hoped that whatever we did he always knew we would support him. Even when some of the things he does scare the shit out of me,” Justin said cringing at some of the things Patrick did.

“I couldn’t be there for Jenny,” I finally said.

JUSTIN

I could tell that something was bothering him, and that bothered me too. Neither of us could do anything where Jenny was concerned. Which meant leaving Gus to do the things that Mel and Michael should have. It made me wonder about something that none of us broached.

“There’s something I don’t get in all of this, Ben just walking away. He loved Jenny, and was pretty much the one who stood by Michael so they could have the right to be involved in her life. It never made any sense to me that he didn’t even try to maintain some kind of contact. Maybe I’m wrong, but it’s just not the man I knew. Of course I wouldn’t have thought he would cheat on Michael either,” I tell him.

“He didn’t cheat on Michael. He just ended the marriage and told Michael it was because he wanted to be with someone who didn’t see him as a second prize. I can give him that much,” Brian said, telling me something new that I didn’t know because I didn’t want to hear about Michael’s problems.

“What happened with Hunter?” I asked.

“After David and Michael got back together, Michael threw that relationship away. Hunter stopped contacting all of them, and Ben told Deb he wasn’t willing to let Hunter continue getting hurt by her family. At the time, Deb was still angry at Ben for leaving Michael, and saw Hunter’s actions as the same thing,” Brian told me, watching me for a reaction.

“It doesn’t bother me to hear about Michael,” I told him.

“After Michael started treating everyone like they were beneath him once again, she told me about what had been going on. She didn’t want to believe Michael was wrong, but she knew there was more to it than Ben finding someone else. It’s when her defense of Michael started to change. She started questioning herself about how little she knew him as a person. She started asking questions about things that happened in the past and I told her something I’d kept from everyone… After that she could no longer keep defending him,” Brian said, holding me tighter.

Brian didn’t want to tell me, so I knew whatever Michael had said was about me. I gave him a couple minutes, planning to drop it, since it really bothered him. “I won’t ask what you told her,” I tell him, hoping he would stop looking like he did something wrong.

Brian started out quietly. “I let it go, even though what he said left me bleeding. Then I was angry at you when I found out Michael did it again, and it caused us to break up,” 

“He said to you that he wished I was dead?” I ask, not surprised.

“Not in those exact words. You and… I can’t call him Ian anymore since it would insult our Ian...” Brian said laughing. “...Ethan, were together at Mel and Lindsay party, and Michael seemed more upset about it that I was,” He says shrugging. “Only he wouldn’t let it go, and kept on saying things about you. I just kept telling him to shut up, not wanting to hear the things he later got Gus to repeat,... until he said something that I still had nightmares about. I let it go, because I didn’t want anyone to see how much it hurt that you left me,” He tells me.

“You let it go because you wanted to believe Michael wasn’t like that,” I tell him.

“Why did you?” He asks.

“He did it to cause more problems between us. Even though I’d spent years with you, when it came to Michael, I couldn’t always be sure how you would react. I didn’t want to hear you find an excuse for it, since we were already having problems at that point. I didn’t want what Michael did to push us over the edge of the cliff we’d been sitting on when I left to come here,” I tell him.

“Did he send it before you started backing out of the comic?” Brian asks.

“No. It was when I told him I didn’t want to do it anymore,” I tell him.

“What made you decide that?” He asks.

“The wedding issue. I figured out it wasn’t about pushing the agenda Ben and Michael were practically shoving at all of us, but Michael knowing how you would see it. I started to see that Michael and I weren’t doing the comic for the same reasons. I let it be the things I wanted from you and he was hoping to get you to show me that you never wanted me as more than the guy you slept with more than once,” I tell him.

“He still thinks he won,” Brian tells me.

“I honestly don’t care what he thinks. Let him live in his delusions. Being with you wasn’t something to show off for me. I never cared you were Brian Kinney, Stud of Liberty Avenue. I love you because you were more than a reputation,” I tell him.

“You were one of the few.” He tells me.

“I know it’s why you fought so hard to let it go, but don’t let Mel use it the way she did in the past. We need to know what’s going on for Gus, and Mel knows what buttons to push with you,” I tell him.

“She can try, but like you, there’s nothing left I care about when it comes to her,” I tell him.

IAN

Gus agreed to let me handle Mel. He told me he’d likely say things that wouldn’t help the situation. He called her to meet him at our apartment, planning to go with Justin, Emmett, and Deb to see his mother. They all agreed to see how Lindsay handled the visit. It was time to broaden Lindsay’s world and I agreed. After making the call, he asked me to listen to what he was thinking and he wanted me to think about it before agreeing with him.

“I don’t want Jenny to have to keep living with Mel. My sister deserves to have the kind of support I’ve always had.” He tells me.

 “Which, other than Deb and Carl, she can’t get due to her mother and father,” I said, seeing where he was going.

“It’s just, not being able to see both of them for who they really are, caused me to do things that I don’t like about myself. I don’t want that for Jenny. I want her to know that love doesn’t come with conditions. She needs to know that even when she makes mistakes, there are still people who will love her and support her. Which she won’t get from Mel or Michael,” He tells me.

“You think you and I are ready for that responsibility?” I ask, knowing I’d do whatever it took to help both Gus and Jenny.

“I think you love for no other reason than it’s with your whole heart and that’s something Michael and Mel lack, because neither of them really understand it in the way you do,” He tells me.

“It’s why I love you, even when no one could understand it, because you do the same,” I tell him.

“I thought about it a lot after seeing Jenny. She needs us to help her with more than dealing with every problem Mel brings to our door. She needs the support that she won’t get from Mel or Michael,” I tell him.

“Then we need to start looking for a house,” I tell him.

“I only wanted you to think about it. Just because I want to make Jenny’s life better doesn’t mean we have to do it.” He tells me.

“We need to do it for Jenny. She deserves to know she’s important, not a pawn to move around. She needs to know that for once, what she wants or thinks means something. I want her to know love isn’t always going to hurt her, and that’s all she gets from Mel and Michael. What Michael alone did to you means he’s likely worse with her. In his mind, she owes him for giving her life,” I tell him.

“It’s why I never wanted you to meet him, he’s a parasite. If we do this we won’t be able to avoid him, because he would see it as a way to mess with my Dad,” Gus tells me.

“Then we go around Michael,” I tell him, as Brian comes in hanging up his phone.

“Do I want to know?” Brian asks us, sounding distracted.

“Gus and I want to try and get custody of Jenny,” I tell him, since the decision was made at this point.

“You plan to get around Michael, how?” Brian asks.

“From the way it sounds, David might be willing to help us. In his head the only thing tying Michael to his previous life is Jenny, who is Gus’s sister. Michael might be saying the right things or doing what David demands, but there’s the link to Gus that David likely sees as a way back to you for Michael. We offer the same thing Justin gave Lindsay’s parents- a way to wash his hands of any responsibility Michael has to Jenny. All we need is for Michael to agree to give up his rights to Jenny, thereby giving David what he wants,” I tell him.

“What about Mel? She’s going to fight you,” Brian tells me.

“Once again we go back to David. He’s managed to keep Mel doing his bidding. The question is how, when Mel wouldn’t easily give in to anyone, much less a man. It never made any sense when I was growing up the way she just gave into David, yet fought you on everything,” Gus tells him.

“I let her, not wanting you to see Lindsay the way she was. I always thought she gave into David because it gave her what she wanted when they got Michael to agree to donate for Jenny,” He tells us.

“Only he didn’t just keep Michael away. It’s like he paid Mel to do what he wanted,” I tell him.

“To insure she did what David wanted. If he’s smart he knows whatever it is might not be enough, and made it so she depended on him the way Michael is. Mel lost her job, and is dealing with possibly losing her right to practice in Canada,” Brian tells us.

“How do you know that?” Gus asked him.

“Emmett called Ted and had him ask her cousin if she knew what caused Mel to want to flee Canada. Apparently, she didn’t like the client she was assigned, so she went to his wife, telling her about his cheating with another woman. Which happened after they separated, but Mel was willing to have the evidence doctored to look like it happened before, so the wife could sue for more in the divorce. The wife went to her lawyer, who in turn went to the judge. The wife did it because she thought it was her husband trying to get her into trouble, only to find out Mel acted alone. Mel also never applied for citizenship, instead she was qualified to stay because she was a lawyer and the firm that hired her qualified her as having a specialized skill. As long as she could practice law she qualified to stay,” Brian tells us.

“If she’s disbarred, she loses her license in Canada and since she never applied for permanent residence then Canada can oust her,” I add.

“At least it now makes sense why she’s here- she couldn’t stay in Canada,” Gus said, looking at his phone when a text came in. “Emmett and Deb are here, good luck with her,” Gus tells us, kissing me and hugging his dad before he left.

I offered Brian a drink while we waited for Mel to show up. With what Brian found out, at least that explained a few things. One thing I didn’t get was why would it matter where Mel lived, it wasn’t like Michael really bothered that much with Jenny as it was. Which I knew only because Jenny tended to talk about everything, yet never had much to say about Michael or David, only to say that the visit was or wasn’t worse than the last.

“Once again Jenny ends up in the middle of a fight,” Brian said absently.

“You think we’re wrong for wanting to keep her with us?” I ask him.

“No. She doesn’t deserve the crap that her birth caused,” Brian tells me.

“Gus told me about Mel, Lindsay, and Michael fighting over Jenny,” I tell him.

“Which Mel saw as me pissing in her pool again. She and Lindsay weren’t together, but at first they planned to fight Michael who was seeking primary custody with Ben…” He said trailing off when the banging on the door interrupted us. 

I sat there letting her bang away, finishing my coffee, as Brian shook with laughter that I wasn’t jumping up to do Mel’s bidding. I went to the door and let her bang again before opening it, barely avoiding the hand that was coming at me, planning to hit the door again.

“It took you enough time to answer. Where’s Gus?” She asked, walking past me into the apartment.

Mel didn’t hide her look of loathing when she saw Brian sitting on the couch. She ignored us both, calling loudly for Gus. 

“He’s not here,” Brian told her.

“He’s not here,” I said louder when she ignored Brian and kept shouting for Gus, making her turn and acknowledge me.

“Where the hell is he? I thought he understood I came here to talk to HIM,” Mel said, practically breathing fire at Gus not doing what she had commanded.

“Which he doesn’t feel like either of you can do right now. You want him to solve your problems, and for him you’re one of them,” I tell her.

“I didn’t do anything that Brian didn’t do, yet I’m the one he’s pissed at,” Mel tells me.

“Try angry, hurt, and feeling like his entire life was a lie that we kept from him. He’s all that and more right now, not just at you but at me too,” Brian tells her.

“Once again I’m the bad guy, the one my son ignores, since the great Brian Kinney never has to deal with the bullshit he does! I couldn’t be what my wife needed, because she was too busy chasing and cleaning up the mess you caused. I couldn’t be the mother I wanted to be and you didn’t stay away because Lindsay couldn’t be without her Peter solving everything. He screws up with everyone and ends up getting everything!” Mel shouts at us.

BRIAN

Ian didn’t even react or try to interfere with Mel’s tirade. Something that in the past I wouldn’t have been able to do. I didn’t say a word because it’s exactly what she wanted. I needed to be the reason everything was wrong in her world. She wanted Ian to see me as the monster she had made up in her mind to explain why her life turned to shit. When I just sat there she decided to lay out my sins to Ian.

“Do you know what it was like for me? My wife refused to have Gus unless her best friend…” Mel said it like I was everything but Lindsay’s best friend. “The guy who fucked her once, then ruined her little fantasy of Brian wanting her by letting her walk in on him with three other guys,” 

It was two, and Lindsay was only looking for me because I had the book she needed for her class, which she got, and told us to carry on, laughing. “Then she defied me in front of everyone. She asked HIM...” she said, pointing at me, the devil. “to help decide on Gus’s name, and made sure he knew she didn’t like the name I picked… And you know what he did, he asked his trick for the night, and that’s how Gus ended up being named Gus,” Apparently that wasn’t enough, because Ian was looking at me like he hadn’t heard anything that made her case. “We came home and Lindsay didn’t depend on me, instead she went to Peter when she couldn’t get out of the funk she fell into. She acted like only he could help her, and then couldn’t understand that I did something, needing to feel like I matter too…” Ian put up his hand to stop her at this point.

“She had postpartum?” He asks me, ignoring Mel, who wasn’t happy he wasn’t focusing on my sins.

“It was pretty bad. She stopped bathing and kept blaming herself for anything that wasn’t going right with Gus,” I tell him.

“Did you tell her doctor that?” Ian asked.

“What the fuck does that matter!?” Mel asks, confused at why Ian wasn’t focusing on her.

“We’ll get back to your tale of the ‘woe is me, my life wasn’t perfect’ in a second.” Ian said, waiting for me to answer.

“It was mentioned, but she worked past it with the medication and the support we gave her.” I tell him.

“Okay, continue on with the ‘everything in my life was Brian Kinney’s fault’, but I have one question I’d like for you to answer. If you hated him, why use him?” Ian waited as Mel seems to think the answer was obvious. “I get that Lindsay wanted to use the man she loved and trusted to have a baby, which is understandable. What I don’t get is why you didn’t say no, but gave in. Why go forward with something when you never liked the man who would always be a part of the child you wanted?”

“She wouldn’t listen to me, instead she kept saying how Brian was willing to not only jerk off, but pay so we could do it safely. He was the goddamn hero while I looked like the jealous spouse for not wanting to use the asshole,” Mel says, stopping when Ian held up his hand.

“I think I have it now. Brian is the villain who caused EVERYTHING to go wrong in your life. Can we move onto the current problem? Which is you not thinking about what Gus is going through but wanting him to put everything aside for your problems? That’s really all I care about, because nothing you say is going to affect my feelings towards Brian or Justin.” Ian tells her.

“Of course not, it doesn’t matter to Gus that Justin…” here we go, Justin taking my place as the devil. “was the reason his mother was gone. Justin kept the bastard kid who caused all our problems, and yet Gus doesn’t see Justin’s part in ruining our lives…” I had so much to say, but Ian beat me to it.

“Gus doesn’t see it because Lindsay walking away from the situation because of how you treated her was the reason it happened. What he sees is that he spent his life pretty much being told his mother left all of you, not just you. What he can see is that his mother is a shadow of the woman he once remembered as vibrant. What I can see is that if Justin hadn’t shown up then Gus would have been visiting his mother at her grave for the rest of his life, because Lindsay wouldn’t have seen a reason to keep going, even to give birth to the child she tried to protect from you,” Ian said barely containing his rage.

“So, now Justin and Brian are saviors while they lied to everyone?” Mel snipes, still unwilling to see she was losing.

“Why would I care if you or anyone knew about my relationship with Justin, since none of you cared or even believed in it? The only person I did lie to was Gus, because I didn’t want him to feel like my loving Justin was betraying him as my son. So in that I was wrong, because my son understood something you still don’t,” I tell her.

“What? That as long as he stays in your good graces the money train doesn’t end.” Mel said sarcastically.

“That’s what you would think, but it just shows me you really are clueless. He understood love wasn’t something easily tossed away. I can’t take credit for that though, because Ian showed him that by standing by him no matter what was said about their relationship. Ian withstood your interference and let you stay in Gus’s life, even when he didn’t understand why you deserved him,” I tell her.

“Then you supported them, so of course he’s on your side,” Mel sneered.

“I supported them because I got to know Ian, and could see Gus loved him. Which had nothing to do with his age, but that with Ian, Gus was comfortable with who he was. We could go on and on, but how about we lay our cards on the table. You want Gus’s support, since Jenny doesn’t want anything to do with your family. I get the move since you lost your job and pretty much everything you have in Canada…” I stopped as Mel swore a blue streak. “But why not just move to another city other than Pittsburgh. I don’t think David really cares, as long as it’s not Pittsburgh,” 

While I’m sure Mel was imagining all sorts of hell reigning down on my head for knowing, I waited for an answer. Ian on the other hand was looking for a way to get what Gus wanted.

“Wouldn’t it be easier for you to get settled, to figure out your life, if Gus and I kept Jenny?” He asked.

“No. It would be easier if Gus stopped acting like I’m to blame for his mother taking a vacation from her life,” Mel replied.

“You think moving Jenny to a place where no one really accepts her as part of your family is better? If Gus and I kept her, there isn’t any question that we love her. Since you never got to know me, I just want you to know that I can afford to support not just Gus, but Jenny too.” He tells her.

“If you can then why are you living here, letting Brian support you?” Mel asks scathingly.

“Brian doesn’t support us, Gus and I do that ourselves. When I moved in with Gus, we took over everything Brian was doing so Gus wouldn’t have to work and go to school at the same time. Brian still insisted on paying for Gus’s education, but other than that everything Gus and I have is because we pay for it. Before you say Brian does it by employing Gus, Gus works for the money Brian pays him, not gives him. We both decided to stay here until Gus finishes school and we knew where we would live, because until recently, to work for Kinnetik Gus would have to be in Pittsburgh, and my job could be done from anywhere. Plus, I have money from my family that I inherited but don’t use unless it’s something Gus or I really need. By the way, Gus hasn’t touched the account Brian set up for him when he was a baby. In telling you that, what I’m trying to point out is that while you get back on your feet, Jenny could stay with us instead of dealing with your parent’s lack of interest in her,” Ian tells her.

“What did you expect Gus to do that would change anything?” I asked.

“My family would be willing to accept Jenny if she’d convert to Judaism, which she refuses to do. She thinks they should just accept her because she their granddaughter the way Deb does, and not care what Jenny believes. Gus could get her to see it’s not a big deal to do this so my family recognizes her,” Mel told us.

“That’s not it,” I counter, since Gus wouldn’t agree to telling Jenny do something just to keep the peace.

“Gus needs to be the one who explained to Jenny why he couldn’t be in her life, since he was refusing to move with us,” Mel said, hating me with each word.

“Why does Jenny need to hate Gus?” Ian asked.

“I never said that,” Mel defends.

“Gus wouldn’t walk away from Jenny, so don’t make it sounded like he was. What were you going to do, force an argument and make it sound like Gus was choosing me over Jenny? Then reinforce it for Jenny by making it sound like he was doing what Lindsay did to them years ago?” Ian asks her.

“Well, wouldn’t he if he stayed here instead of showing Jenny she was the most important person in his life?” Mel asks, turning and leaving the apartment.

“She should not have been raising any kids,” Ian says, looking horrified at the lengths Mel was willing to go to get her way. “He’s never going to want her in his life after this,”

“He will have to fight her to get Jenny,” I remind him.

“Most courts will listen to Jenny’s wants since she’s sixteen now. We just need to make sure David has Michael under control and hope whatever it is that David used on Mel doesn’t hurt Jenny,” Ian said, sounding ready to slay all of Jenny and Gus’s dragons. 

“Talk to the lawyer who helped the first time they went to war over Jenny. He’s a shark, but he also knows every way to win, even when you don’t like how he has to do it.” I tell him, writing down Gabriel’s number.

“I’ve never wanted to hit anyone before,” Ian states.

“Wait until you meet Michael, because even Mel can’t top that asshole,” I tell him.

“Why do you think we’ll meet?” Ian asks.

“He won’t be able to resist trying to look like the victim, so Jenny will think he didn’t do it willingly,” I tell him.

“Even with David trying to control him?” Ian asks.

“The real question is whether David really does. Or is Michael once again manipulating him to get what Michael wants?” I comment, not sure which way it really was. “Either way we’ll know soon,” I added.

“Why?” Ian asks.

“Justin’s agent agreed we should announce the engagement, since people will be curious about it and show up at his next show. She wants to introduce a new artist, using the buzz surrounding Justin,” I tell him.

“How will that help the new artist?” I ask, as we get ready to go pick up Patrick to meet everyone for lunch.

“Justin likes to help anyone he sees as talented, so he agreed to stick close to the new artist. He lets the curious follow him, while making sure they look at his work,” I tell him.

“Most of his shows attract crowds anyway,” Ian states.

“Sue me, I like the idea of finally being able to claim Justin in front of the world,” I tell him, smiling that Ian wasn’t easily fooled.