Justin Taylor stood in the toilet cubicle of the men's room at JFK airport. It had been over an hour since Brian and he arrived for their flight to Pittsburgh. Brian wasn't in any mood to talk. He was in one of his I'm not even going to look at you moods.
HE KNEW...HE KNEW ABOUT HIS DIAGNOSIS...but had his mother told him everything...what the prognosis was?
"Will passengers for American airlines flight AA4742 to Denver, please go to gate 145 where your flight is ready to board..."
The announcement made him jump out of his thoughts, he flushed the toilet and came out of the cubicle and washed his hands.
When he came out the mens room, he saw Brian sitting on one of the couches flicking through a copy of the NEW YORK POST.
Justin strolled over and sat next to him. They both sat in silence. Just the clatter and chatter of other passengers sitting or passing by around them, and of Brian turning over the sheets of the newspaper.
Justin looked at him, "Are you gonna be like this all the way home? Not talk to me"
Brian didn't look at him, he folded up the newspaper, retreathed a packet of mints from his pocket and ate one.
Justin huffed at him, "you not gonna offer me one?"
Still not looking at him, Brian held the packet to him and Justin took a mint and noisy unwrapped it.
Sucking it, he stood up and was about to head to the nearby bookstore when Brian said "Where are you going now?"
Justin turned, Brian wouldn't meet his eyes, "Just to the store...it's okay...I'm not about to run away back to my apartment or anything...", he then chuckled, "...I'm still your prisoner Mr Kinney!"
No response.
Frustrated, Justin turned and walked to the store. Finally, Brian did look up and watched him go...eyes betraying his inner concern...
QAF
On the flight home, Brian sat next to the window staring out. Justin looked about them and checked his seatbelt. He then looked at Brian, "Have you got those mints...", Brian sighed and reached into his pockets and dug them out and dropped them into Justin's lap without a word, "I like to SUCK ON something during take offs and landings", he said with a big smile on his face.
Justin popped a mint into his mouth and then looked down and saw Brian's arm on the rest. Justin placed his arm beside it and then with his pinky finger stroked Brian's wrist.
Brian relented and rolled his head to look at Justin, who beamed a smile at him.
At Last! Brian hinted a smile at him and squeezed Justin's hand, holding eye contact for a few precious seconds before rolling his head to look out the window again.
Justin faced front and smiled...wondering what life was going to be like back in Pittsburgh.
QAF
Justin stared out of the car window and he realized Brian was pulling into his mothers street.
"You've brought me back here?"
Brian glanced at him briefly as he turned the steer-wheel towards the curb, "Why wouldn't I? Your Mom is worried"
Justin shook his head and frowned, "But I thought..."
Brian stopped the car outside of Jennifer's house and put it into park, he looked at Justin knowing what the boy was thinking.
"Then you thought wrong...Your Mom is upset and you need to look after her"
"and me?"
"She'll look after you"
"and you?"
Brian heaved a sigh at him, "I'm not what you need, what can I do?"
Justin held his eyes, "You brought me home"
Brian broke the gaze and looked through the rear-view mirror, "I promised your Mom I would"
Justin faced front. They both sat in silence for a minute, before he had to ask what had been on his mind since Brian had shown up in New York.
"Do you know what's wrong with me?"
Brian faced front too, he shrugged because he hadn't had the time to process the information Jennifer told him, "It doesn't matter what I do or don't know...now...", he looked at him as he grabbed the door release, "...I'll help you with your bag"
Justin huffed and grabbed his door release and got out, "don't bother I can manage, just open the trunk"
Brian looked at him across the roof of the car, "Justin it is nearly 4am, just go and open the fucking door will you"
Before Justin could argue, a light was on in the house and the front door was opening with Jennifer running up the walk in her night gown, "Justin! Thank God!"
Brian pulled Justin's baggage along and parked it on the walk as Jennifer pulled her son into a tight hug, "as promised...he's back home in one piece"
Justin squirmed out of his mother's tight hold, "hey take it easy, I'm okay Mom"
Brian raised his eyebrows at him, "He's NOT...but he will be"
"Are you coming in?", asked Justin hopefully.
Brian glanced at his watch and nodded no, "I really gotta get to bed...I've got a busy day TODAY"
Justin looked disappointed and shrugged, "Okay..."
Brian pulled Justin's bag along the walk and set it inside the porch then he turned, "Well...get some sleep too...you look tired"
Jennifer was beaming a smile at her son and cupped his cheeks, "Ohhhhh I'm so relieved to have you home...THANK YOU BRIAN"
Brian replied with a smile. He winked at Justin and got into his car and drove off.
Jennifer lead her son into the porch, "Right you...BED...because Brian is right...you look dead beat, go get some rest please"
Justin watched her close the front door and yawned. He suddenly felt very tired. The sooner his head hit the pillow the better.
QAF
Brian stared out of the window of his loft apartment. He drank a nightcap, even though it was now nearly 5 in the morning and was nearly time to get up. He padded bare foot in his jeans and nothing else to the computer at his desk and placed the glass down and sat.
On screen he had an internet page on MOTOR NEURON'S DISEASE.
He had read and reread the first few paragraphs, and then decided he really needed that drink.
He stared at the screen and tried to read it again. His eyes left the screen the same place as before so he gave up and switched it off.
Nothing was good about it. There was no good outcome from the little he did read about.
"fuck"
He crawled on to the bed and rolled, stared up to the ceiling.
"Fuck this life...why him...it's all bullshit"
QAF
3 hours later, Brian sat at the traffic lights. He looked up at the red light then looked off to his right. The office was straight on but he found himself turning the wheel and signelling right. He had to see if he was okay.
Jennifer was just out grabbing the letters from the mail box when she saw Brian's car pull up to the curb in the bright morning sun.
"Hi Brian...Justin's out back if you want to go see him"
Brian stuck his head out the drivers window, "I don't...I just stopped by to see if he was alright after last night"
Jennifer pushed her hair behind her ear and stepped up to the window, "He's a little tired but...look, you are welcome to..."
Brian shook his head, "No...look, it's not that I don't want to, it's...I've got this real important meeting scheduled later and I need to prepare...it's something I should have done yesterday..."
Jennifer nodded, "I'm sorry...I didn't mean to take you from your work...I expected too much from you..."
Brian gave her a reassuring smile, "I wanted too...tell him to keep his...keep on smiling", he then stepped on the gas and was pulling away, Jennifer watched him drive off.
QAF
"...and now I'm back here in Pittsburgh",announced Justin on his cell phone to Lisa.
"well, I guess it's for the best...I'm gonna really miss you, the gallery visits are just not gonna be the same"
Justin sat back in the garden swing couch in the sun, "You'll be okay...you're find some other muse who'll be just as entertaining as me"
"So what are you gonna do? Please don't say you're just sit around and..."
"Wait to die?", Justin laughed, "No...I'll find something to do...I just have to keep up with my exercise routine and hope for the best"
"Well...give me a few weeks then I'll come visit you"
Justin smiled down the phone, "I'll hold you to that...take care Lise and good luck with the art fair next week, byyye"
Jennifer was just stepping out of the french doors as he hung up.
"Who was that honey?"
"Just Lisa in New York...I didn't get chance to call her before I left"
Jennifer was going through the mail, "Ohhh, I saw Brian out front..."
Justin looked up at her with a hopeful expression, "Ha-ha, is he coming in?"
Jennifer shook her head, "No, he was only just passing...he asked after you...and he DID say that he had an important meeting to get to"
Justin could sense his mother was trying to whitewash the whole thing, Brian didn't WANT to see him.
"How very convenient"
"What do you mean?"
Justin stood and headed to the french doors and turned before he answered her, "I have to face it Mom...HE doesn't want anything to do with me...not now I've got this...who would?"
Jennifer watched him disappear inside. She turned around and sighed...what on earth was Brian Kinney playing at?"
QAF
Jennifer had left the real estate office and drove her car towards Brian's building. She got out and hurried in and up the steps to the top floor.
Inside, Brian, lounging about in a vest and jeans, bit into a sandwich and watched CNN. The rap on the door annoyed him a little. After-all he had just spent hours trying and triumphantly winning over a new advertizing campaign for his top client.
He slid the door across and Jennifer was there smiling at him, "Hi...I thought I'd stop by"
Brian gave her the most doubtful look, "Not convincing enough...it's not exactly on your way home"
Jennifer changed tactic as she entered, "I had a house viewing nearby"
Brian turned and still wasn't convinced, "nice try"
Jennifer came clean dumping her purse on the counter, "Okay, you've got me...I've come about Justin"
Brian moved over to his couch to finish his sandwich, "I'd never would have guessed"
She watched him eat the sandwich and focus on the TV. She came over picked up the remote control and killed the volume.
"Heyyyy, I was watching that!"
"When are YOU gonna drop by, huh?"
Brian leaned back on the couch and waved his hand at her, "I'm NOT what he needs"
It was Jennifer's turn not to be convinced, "are you sure it's not the other way around?"
Brian was immediately on the defensive and screwed his face up, "Give me a break! I LOVE HIM"
Jennifer looked at him in a deliberate enactment of surprize, "You have a funny way of showing it!"
Brian jumped up and pointed to his own chest, to empathize his case, "I brought him home didn't I!"
"But he needs YOU...and...I would really appreciate the help"
Brian stared at here for a few moments and then ran a hand through his hair whilst walking towards the window, "Jennifer...to be honest...I don't think I can deal with it...with him"
Jennifer folded her arms, "So you are just gonna let him down?"
Brian didn't want to let Justin down, but he just didn't know how to deal with it. He opened his mouth with an answer that he thought was quite reasonable.
"Look...ANYTHING...if you need ANYTHING...bills paid...medical fees...hospital accommodation fees...just come ask me"
Jennifer looked sadly back at him. That wasn't the answer she wanted, although she half expected it from Brian.
"He needs YOU not your money...infact, don't bother...I didn't see you as a flake...", she walked over to the exit and turned on her heel as she slid it aside, "...seems I was wrong"
Brian looked away as the door slid shut. He then sat down and closed his eyes sitting in silence wondering how he could process all of this
QAF
"It's great to see you Justin!"
Daphne hugged him tight in the park.
"You too"
Daphne lead him to a bench, "So how long are you in town for? I couldn't believe it when you called me"
Justin sat down and turned to her, "I've...moved back"
Daphne was shocked to hear that, "What? But what about you art career!"
Justin ran his hand through his blonde hair and shrugged, "I can still make it in Pittsburgh"
Daphne wasn't really buying this at all. She shook her head and made a point of it, "But you told me that you LOVED New York! I was gonna come visit and we were making all those plans to go out"
Justin searched her eyes and held them, "Daphne...I'm..."
She could see that something was wrong and she tried for some encouragement, "Hey Justin what's wrong?
He looked to the ground, "I'm...sick...", he met her eyes again, "...that's why I'm back"
Daphne nodded, "Okayyy..so...what's wrong with you?"
Justin could see Daphne was worried, he could see the color drain from her face as she was going over and over different sickness's that Justin could have in her mind.
"Errrm..just a brain thing...it's NOT serious ar anything, I've just come back to get better", he lied and was a little too quick with the story.
Daphne wanted to press him further because she KNEW that he said that too fast, "as long as you are okay...", she uttered.
Justin nodded and gave her one of his sunshine smiles...he was pleased when she managed a smile back for him, so he jumped in changing the subject.
"So...how's things with you? Tell me about Jake, is it? Is he hot?!"
QAF
"Justin, you LIED to her!"
Justin got himself a glass of water in the kitchen as Jennifer stood in the doorway.
"I'm not ready to go tell everybody. It's bad enough that you and Brian know!"
Jennifer followed him into the living room, "So what about Debbie and Michael and the rest of our friends? Are you going to keep them in the dark as well?"
Justin sat down on the couch and glared at her, "I said I don't want them to know...NOT YET...they don't NEED to know yet"
Jennifer tried to reason with him, although she was doing this for herself as well, "but honey, people will need to know so they can look out for you"
He shook his head at her, "...and so they can wrap me up in bubble-wrap...no thanks...I want to be treated like normal...or as normal as I can damn well keep it up for!"
Jennifer sighed as she gave up her stand, "I suppose it IS your decision...after-all you are an adult"
Justin smiled, "It is"
Jennifer was about to turn around but she risked it anyway, "and your father? What about him? Justin he NEEDS to know, so does Molly"
Justin blew out a laugh as he stood up, "Dad? I don't care whether I see him again...and Molly is too young to understand"
Jennifer went silent.
"Mom...I just NEED to do this MY way...you promised"
Jennifer managed to look up and paint on a very reluctant smile, "alright Justin...we'll play this YOUR way..."
"I'm home now, all we can do is look to the future and make the best of it"
Justin was glad to be home and he had a long journey ahead and with the love from his family and friends, the future didn't feel so dark.
END
Author's Chapter Notes:
That's it from me folks. No more chapters will be added due to lack of interest. It really is okay, I understand that this is not an easy read - but for those who did read, I thank you x
The End.
Markab1972 is the author of 1 other stories.
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This story is a favorite of 4 members. Members who liked Life to the full also liked 277 other stories.