A smirking Brian got dressed in record time. Passing by the mirror he gave himself a once over and had to admit that he didn’t look like a broken hearted stood-up at the almost altar lover. But hey, he was Brian Kinney, he always looked good. He smiled smugly at his reflection and strutted to the kitchen. He gave Justin a deep kiss, took his key of the early morning changed locks, and left to accomplish the first step of their plan.

Brian wasn’t stupid. He knew Michael and Lindsay were in love with him and were just playing house with their partners. He avoided addressing it when they were younger because he needed them. He needed the love struck best friend who enjoyed taking care of him when his father beat him up. He needed the WASP wannabe princess who enjoyed crossing her parents by introducing him to their well-connected friends. He was born on the wrong side of town and he knew it. He also knew that to become the person he wanted to be, he had to survive the beatings and then make contacts with the rich and affluent. So he knowingly used Michael and Lindsay’s unrequited love to help himself become Brian Fucking Kinney. What he didn’t know was that they would still be stuck in their teenage dreams well into their thirties.

In the car, he called the two people he knew he could trust with his life. Ted and Cynthia. He told them that the twat was still in Pittsburg and explained their plan. To say both were overjoyed by the news would be an understatement.

Brian parked in the Muncher Mansion driveway. He took a deep breath, got out of the car, and knocked on the door. A smiling Mel was the one to open.

“Hey Brian, come on in!”

Well that was a strange sight!

Brian followed Mel to the family room where Gus was playing with his trains and Lindsay was busy turning little Jenny Rebecca into little Lindsay. If this didn’t require the Children Protective Services intervention, he wondered what did.

“Daddyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!”

Gus ran to his dad and happily jumped in his arms. Then he remembered why daddy was alone.

“I miss Jussin daddy!”

Brian gave his boy a squeeze and kissed his temple.

“I miss him too Sonny boy.”

Lindsay stood up with Jenny still in her arms and came to give a hug to Brian and Gus.

“It’s okay honey! Justin put his career first. We need to wish him luck and remember that we still have a family.”

How Melanie didn’t pull her wife by the hair and slap her in that moment remains a mystery! Brian detached himself from the unneeded hug and sat on the couch with his son still in arms. He would have gladly taken Jenny out of her mother’s arms. No child deserved to be used as an accessory for theatrical dramatics. But first things first.

“Well Lindsay, you should be happy he put his career first. That’s what you wanted! Anyway, I didn’t come here to listen to platitudes. I need a break. I’m taking a mini holiday and I want to take Gus with me.”

Mel surprised him by expressing her positive opinion of his plan.

“That’s a great idea. Some father-son bonding time would be great for both of you.”

Before Brian or Lindsay could react, Gus was off his father’s lap and in his momma’s arms.

“Really I can go with daddy?”

“Of course you can. Your daddy needs you and you two will have a wonderful time together.”

“When are you planning on leaving and how long will you be gone?”

“I’m leaving today and would be back in four or five days.”

“Where are you going? Just so I know what to pack for Gus.”

Brian was about to ask the woman who looked so much like Mel who she was and what had happened to real Mel when the placating voice of Lindsay interrupted him.

“I don’t think that’s a good idea. It would be better if I went with you guys. You don’t want to be responsible for a four-year-old.”

Alien Mel was on her case quicker than Bolt!

“He’s been financially responsible for this four-year-old for four years. So I don’t see why he can’t take him on a short vacation!”

“Throwing money at a problem isn’t the same as taking care of it”

Mel gave her wife a lethal look before turning her attention to the boy in her arms.

“Gussie go to your room baby, choose some books to take with you and when you finish start putting your underwear on your bed. I’ll be up in a moment to help you pack.”

“Thank you, momma.”

Gus gave Mel an extra squeeze and a big kiss on her cheek and shot up to his bedroom. Brian knew that Mel loved Gus but he had never witnessed them together lately. They were so at ease together and Mel’s deep love for their son showed in the boy’s love and trust of his momma. Brian would always regret giving up his rights but seeing momma and son, he was relieved. Once Mel felt Gus had enough time to have arrived to his room, she zeroed in on Lindsay.

“First of all, last time I checked, Gus was our son, not our problem! Second, Gussie is the easiest kid I know. Even when he’s being naughty, he’s being cute and funny! No nanny McPhee is needed to take care of him! Third, short of an unexpected accident, nothing is going to happen that Brian won’t be able to handle! Now that I cleared that up, I’m going upstairs to help my son pack for his vacation with his father. So Brian, where are you taking him?”

“Euuuuhhh…..what? I mean I’m taking him to California.”

“Good! I’m sure he’s going to love it!”

Brian might have been Melanie’s nemesis for most of her adult life and they might never be best friends or each other’s biggest fans but the woman was his son’s loving mother and he felt like he could make a step towards a better relationship with her.

“Listen, why don’t you pack a bag for Jenny too? I’m sure Gus will love having his sister coming with us.”

The twin expressions of shock and bewilderment on the Munchers’ faces were hilarious but Brian was in no mood to laugh. Mel studied Brian’s face for a moment. He was fucking genuinely serious.

“Thank you, Brian. You have no idea what it means to me but I don’t think you’ll be able to take care of both kids alone without going crazy. And I think Gus would love to spend some father-son time with you. But I will hold you up to your invitation in a couple of years.”

“And I will keep inviting her”, was out of Brian’s mouth before he had the time to think he’d better shut up unless he wanted to start sounding like a lesbian.

Mel went upstairs to help “her” son get ready for his trip with daddy leaving Brian alone with an irate Lindsay.

“Well Brian, I hope you realize how hard it will be to take care of a child.”

“Thank you for your concern.”

Lindsay expected Brian to go on the defensive or to admit he didn’t know how to do it and invite her along despite Mel’s clear objection to this specific idea. Hell, she even expected him to cancel on his son and rush to some backroom. She didn’t expect a cold smile and a corporate slap down.

“We need to talk about support. Once we’ll be in Toronto we’ll need you to help us settle down.”

Justin had told him during their morning conversation that Lindsay would probably raise the support issue and try to weaponize it against him.

“We’ll talk about when I come back.”

“I’d rather we talk about it now. I’d feel better once we have a plan in place.”

“And I’d rather talk about it when all those concerned are present. I’d feel better having Ted here when we discuss the plan.”

Speaking of plans, this conversation was definitely not going according to Lindsay’s plan.

“When does Ted have to do with your support to your son and one of your best friends?”

“Making sure that I’m only supporting my son, possibly his sister, but definitely not one of two of my so-called best friends.”

“I beg your pardon?”

The “daddy” excited scream coming down the stairs saved Lindsay’s life and Brian’s freedom. Once the boy reached the landing he ran to his daddy’s arms with Mel following close behind.

“I am all ready! Momma said we can buy anything I don’t have but momma always makes sure I have everything so don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried Sonny boy. And I don’t want you to worry. We’ll buy anything you want or need. Okay, say good bye to your mothers and sister. We need to leave.”

Gus ran to Lindsay but instead of kissing her good bye, he hugged his baby sister for a good minute and gave her a couple of kisses while stage whispering how much he loved, how much he will miss her and promising her a lot of gifts from “Calinarnia”. He gave Lindsay a quick kiss goodbye before running back to Mel who got another big hug and resounding kisses on both of her cheeks as well as reminders of how much she was a loved momma and promises of calling her every day.

Gus’ apparent dismissal of Lindsay as someone who was around was quite telling. In his whole life, Brian hadn’t hated a person as much as he hated Lindsay in that moment. She was such a cold bitch that even her 4 year-old couldn’t fake caring about her.

Brian thanked Melanie profusely and left the Munchers Mansion with his son in his arms all ready for part two of Sunshine’s plan.