Chapter 10

“How can we live a couple miles apart and never see each other?”  Justin asked Marcus as he gave him a long hug.

“I know.  Since you got back it's been crazy,” Marcus kissed his cheek and they walked around the outside of the house to the pool area, arm in arm.  

“How is it going with Jed?” Justin asked as they walked onto the patio.

“He is one amazing young man who, by the way, is in love with your grandson.”

“Well, that’s good because they have been fucking every chance they get.”  Justin laughed at Marcus’ face.  “You didn’t know?”

“No, I didn’t.  Because of the Foster Parent rules, I asked them not to do anything at our house and they are respecting that.”  Marcus and Justin moved near the table already set.  “Have you had your leg looked at?” 

“I’m sorry, am I leaning too hard?”

“Justin, I would carry you if that would help you out.”  They arrived at the table and both sat down.

“I have talked to my doctor.  I will see him in October but he wants to see if whatever is affecting it heals itself.  I know I stressed it finishing the mural. And that is why we hired Nico,” Justin said as Nico brought the food out to them.  After each of them had taken a couple bites, Justin stopped.

“Are you going to tell me why we’re having lunch?”

“Marc, you’re my best friend. Can’t we…”

“Don’t waste our time.  Ever since you got back there has been something going on. Brian isn’t still …”

“No, he’s getting there.  Someone dropped by the gallery on opening night.”

“Well, I am guessing lots of people dropped by.  Justin, what is it? Who was it?”

“I know we’ve talked about this before but, did Dan ever talk about his family?”

“Just enough to say he had a much younger brother but he had no contact with any of them.  I also saw a news article about his father dying many years ago. Why? He didn’t have a wife and kids back in the day, did he?”

Justin reached across the table and took Marc’s hand. “The man that showed up was Adam, Dan’s brother.  Marcus’ expression changed a bit but Justin had expected more reaction. “You don’t seemed shocked.”

“I’m actually a little relieved.  A couple years ago, the last time Dan and I went to Seattle before he got too sick, he disappeared for an afternoon.  He tried to tell me it was a business thing but I just knew it wasn’t.  I overheard a whispered call and heard him say the name Adam.  I asked him about it but he was so adamant about not talking about it. I didn’t push him and his health decreased quickly after that so I just put it out of my mind and took care of my husband.  A few weeks ago I was going through Dan’s office and ran across a notebook that had the start of several letters, all of them to Adam.  None of them were more than a couple sentences and although slightly different, they all showed regret about something. I actually had planned to ask you and Brian about it.  How long have you known about Adam?”

“I didn’t know anything until he walked in the door that night.”

“What does he look like? Does he look like Dan?”

“He looks very similar to Dan at that age.  He is younger than you.  I would guess about 50.”

“What did he want? How did he connect you with him?”

“Dan had mentioned us.  They had talked several times.  Adam seemed very genuine and we have checked into him a bit.  He has plenty of money of his own and we really think he just wants to meet you and your family.  His own wife and kids were killed in an accident a few years ago. I think he just wants to meet his only living relatives. He wants to learn more about Dan.”

Marcus didn’t respond for several moments.  “I need to talk to the kids.  I need to know their thoughts but I know I would like to meet him.”

“Talk to your kids.  If you have any questions …. I will send you his contact information. The friends finished their meal and Nico appeared and cleared off the table.  “Let’s go sit in the lounge chairs.  Soon it will be too chilly to enjoy it out here.”

Marcus linked his arm in Justin’s and they walked over to a sofa out in the sun and sat next to each other. Justin put an arm around Marcus, who rested against him.  “Tell me about him.  Is he like Dan?”

“His voice was similar and we talked about his looks but it surprised me that some of his mannerisms were so much like Dan and they had only met a couple times.  When we got to the diner, he had coffee waiting for us.  He wore his heart on his sleeve a little more than Dan but he has gone through a lot of pain.  I know Dan had that same heart he just hid it well.”

Justin glanced down at his friend who had a stray tear running down his cheek. “Justin, I miss him so much.  I reach for him at night and he isn’t there.  I start talking and realize he isn’t there.  Sure, I miss the sex but we had only done that a couple time in the last year but I  miss my best friend.  I miss the lover who knew me so well I didn’t have to say anything.”

Justin opened his mouth to say something but instead just kissed the top of his head and tightened his arms around him.

Brian stood in the doorway of the house watching them.  Nico walked up to him and said, “Is this expected?” he asked Brian as they watched Justin pull Marcus closer.

“Ya, and it fucks me up every time.  I...the four of us were always close but without Dan...   I know Sunshine is mine but Marc is much younger and still very good looking. They have a relationship….well, like Dan and I did and I don’t like seeing them like that but there is no changing it now.”

“But like you said, Brian, you are his true love.”

“Thanks, Nico, I am glad you’re here.  I can tell you are going to be good for both of us.”

Marcus went home and found himself very restless.  By the time Jed arrived home from school, Marcus was preparing dinner.  Cooking had always been a way for him to think things through and with Jed in the house he knew it would get eaten.  

Jed sensed something instantly, “Um, Marcus, is everything alright?  I get the feeling something happened today.  Do you want to talk to Justin or…”

Marcus smiled at the young man.  He was so fond of him already.  Life had dealt him a lot of crap but he was always caring and loving.  “Jed, I’m fine.  I just found out something today that I hadn’t heard before and I need to talk to my kids about it but Danny is still at work so I plan to talk to both of them tonight.”

“If you need to talk…”

Marcus hugged Jed, “It isn’t a bad thing, I promise.  It will be about an hour before dinner, if you want to relax or get your homework done.”

“Ok, but if you need some help let me know.”

“Thanks, son.  I will.” 

Marcus didn’t see it but Jed was smiling from ear to ear.  Son.  He had called him son.  Jed still missed his family but he had realized he didn’t feel the stress he used to. He didn’t have to worry about having to move or if he would have a place to sleep.  He hoped his sisters were as comfortable as he was.

Gus had told Pen they would talk this evening so after a nearly silent, tense dinner Gus and Trenton went out on the deck.  “Want drink,” was the first thing Pen said all night.

“What would you like? Coffee, water, tea?”

“Vodka,” came out quite clearly.

Gus started to smile but then noticed Trenton was serious. “Oh, Pen, you really don’t…” Gus moved to hug him but he was pushed away.

“Vodka!”

“I guess if you want to throw away 30 years of sobriety you know where the alcohol is but I am not getting it for you.”

“Go home?” Trenton now looked very defeated. “Miss home.”

Now Gus did put his arms around him and kissed him.  “I know you do, Pen.  The doctor said you can go home but I am worried about you.  I have never seen you in this kind of mood and I understand that but I need to know you will text if you need me.” Gus put his hands on either side of his face and looked him directly in the eyes, “You will get better.  I know you will but if you could never speak another word, I know you could communicate.  I have seen you writing on your laptop already. Pen, I need to know ….”

“No drive.  Visit?”

“You are right you can’t drive yet but probably next week.  And of course I will visit you.”

“Love me?”  He rolled his eyes, “Feel like child!” his frustration was obvious.

“I know for someone who communicates so beautifully, this is even harder.  I will stay with you the first night for sure and then we will see.”

“Shel hate me? Been mean.”

“She still loves you.  We both understand but her patience is running thin. If the first night goes well, I will need to be here but if you need anything….someone could stay with you.”

“No, my place!” he than softened a bit and looked at Gus, “Our place.” 

Shelby watched Gus and Trenton kiss.  It was long and slow and if she wasn’t so jealous it would be beautiful.  It was time for her to have her husband to herself.  She knew she would always have to share him but she didn’t have to share her home, too.  

The next day Gus drove Trenton home and after getting him settled in, he went off to work. Shelby agreed someone should stay with him tonight but after that she expected Gus home a good part of the time. When Gus arrived at Trenton’s after work that day, Trent had dinner waiting for him.  They ate at the counter and cleaned up the kitchen in silence but then Trent took Gus’ hand and led him out to the porch where he had his laptop open and he started talking through the computer. Gus could barely read as fast as his fingers added words.  He didn’t have anything specifically he wanted to say but he wanted the interaction with Gus.  After this went on for a couple hours, Gus yawned.

“I’m sorry but I need to start thinking about bed.  I have to  be out of here early in the morning for a meeting.  A tear slipped out of Trent’s eye and he brushed it away, not wanting Gus to notice.  Since the stroke his emotions came out frequently and they were erratic which is why he had snapped at both Shelby and Gus. It’s also why he was crying now.  Gus stood and reached for Trenton’s hand.  He stood and, after closing the laptop, he picked it up and they walked in together.  Trenton’s limp was nearly undetectable and the weakness in his hand and arm was also well hidden.  As they both undressed and got in bed they used their bodies to say everything.

Marcus had talked to his kids and both of them agreed that if Marcus wanted to meet Adam it was a good idea.  Hannah probably wouldn’t be home when he came down but Danny would definitely be there for Marcus for support.  As he said goodbye to Danny and Hannah, Jed came in to say goodnight. He saw a distant look on Marcus’ face and hesitated for a moment if he should say anything.  He started to turn around to leave when Marcus noticed him.

“Oh, hey Jed, you heading to bed?”

“I was.  Did you talk to Danny and Hannah? It’s none of my business since I am not family but if there is anything I can do for you….”

“Jed, I know you have your own family but as far as I am concerned, as long as you live in my house you are family and you are I should have included you.  I just found out that my Darling Dan had a brother.  The story is too long to go into now but I am going to arrange for a time for Adam to come visit.  I just wanted to run it past the kids before I brought a stranger here to talk about their dad.”

“Marcus, if I can ever do anything…”

“That is very nice, Jed, and you don’t know how much it helps me having you in the house with me.” Marcus walked over and hugged Jed.  “I sometimes forget that you just lost family, too.”  Jed tightened his grip on Marcus and for a moment neither said anything.   Marcus then said, “Why don’t you get to bed.  I will let you know when Adam is coming and some night I will tell you the whole story or as much as I know.”

“Marcus, I hope you know how much I….thank you for taking me in.” With that Jed turned and moved toward his room.  Marcus watched the brave young man as he entered his room.  He was going to check into the status of Jed’s mother.  He wanted Jed to feel safe and secure and not live under the worry of what was to come.

Justin met Kevin in the old wine barn that had now been converted into a large art studio.  Kevin had started working on a large sculpture while Justin sat in another area working on a painting.  Nico started hanging out there when he had research to do, too.  He found the atmosphere energizing and with Brian and Justin’s permission, moved an old desk into the loft area which was his work area.  This is how they spent part of most days although Justin did have days where he just stayed at the house if his leg was bothering.  

Brian thought Justin’s appointment couldn’t come soon enough.  He was afraid that they would be told there was nothing that could be done unless he was ready for amputation.  They had been told years ago there wasn’t much more that could be done.  It was probably scar tissue causing the issue today. As Brian sat drinking a cup of coffee, there was a knock on the door and Marcus entered the house.

“Oh, Brian, is Justin around?” Marcus stiffened as soon as he saw him. “ wanted to let him know about Adam’s visit.”

“He’s at the barn. You talked to Adam?” 

“Yes, he is coming in a couple of weeks.  I wanted to make sure Danny was available.  Hannah can’t make it.  She is too involved with med school.”

Brian nodded as if to dismiss him but it wasn’t going to be that easy.

“What did I do now, Brian?  Dan used to explain your actions to me when I didn’t understand something but I don’t have him anymore. Do I mourn wrong? How am I pissing you off now?”

Brian turned and drilled a hole through Marcus with his eyes, “Keep your hands off Sunshine.”  Brian pivoted but had only taken a step when Marcus stopped him dead in his tracks.

“You know Justin will only ever love you.  I have lost my best friend.  I have lost the man I love and I will never love another like that but that doesn’t mean I can handle all of this alone.  How many times did you go to Dan with a problem?  I just need someone to talk to.  Please don’t make Justin choose because I know I would be the one to go and I just can’t do all this without him.” Now it was Marcus who turned and walked out leaving Brian to watch him go.   

Brian moved to the door and called out to stop him. “Marcus!” Brian moved toward the vehicle he stood by.

“Brian, I don’t have the energy to go over this….”

Brian moved up to him, the open door between them.  “Marcus…” Brian reached to the top of the car door and put one hand on top of Marcus’. He took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I …. I just miss him so much and seeing you reminds me of him. I can’t imagine how much you miss him.  You know I always want control and…  You were the best thing that happened to Dan.  He said that all the time.  Just remember, I feel the same way about Sunshine.” Marcus stepped around the car door and hugged him.

“Brian, I could never forget that but more importantly, Justin would never let me. I will make sure you both get all the details about Adam.  I think it would be good for the two of you to come for lunch or dinner one of the days he is here.”  After a quick kiss and another hug, Marcus sat down.  Brian shut the door and Marcus drove toward the barn.

When Marcus rushed into the barn Justin stood and using a cane to move faster, rushed to meet him.  “What's wrong?” Justin put a hand on his arm.

Marcus wrapped his arms around Justin and kissed him.  “He finally talked to me, I  mean really talked to me!”

“What? Who? What are you talking about?”

“Let’s sit so you don’t have to just stand here.” They walked over to a bench near the door and sat down.  “I stopped by the house looking for you and Brian first gave me the normal threat but when I turned and left the house he followed me.  Brian said he was sorry.  He actually reached out and showed he was still missing him as much as I am.  He hugged me.  I know Brian will still be Brian but we have finally gotten through.” 

Justin moved over and kissed him. Marcus felt relief flow from him.  “Thank god. I really didn’t know what else to try with him.” 

“Excuse me, Justin, I don’t mean to interrupt but I need you to look at that joint before I move on.” 

“No problem, come and take a look at this.  Kevin is very talented.” The three walked toward the sculpture.  After Justin checked what Kevin had done and Marcus talked to Kevin about his work, Marc and Justin walked back to where Justin had been sitting when Marcus arrived.  “Marc, why were you coming to see me in the first place?”

“Oh, I forgot in all the excitement.  I talked to Adam.  He will be coming in a couple weeks.  I told Brian I want the two of you to spend some time with him too.  I think you both have stories from before we were married that would be interesting to Adam.”

“Did Brian sound open to that?”

“He didn’t reject the idea.  I told him I would get you details once Adam knows exactly when he will get here.  I know I only talked to him a very short time but I liked him.  I am excited to meet him.”  Marcus touched Justin’s leg and even though he knew it hadn’t hurt him, Justin jumped. “Justin, what’s going on with your leg? It hasn’t gotten any better.”

“I’d rather not talk about it.”

“I wouldn’t be your friend if I didn’t ask.”

“Kevin, that’s not the way you do that!” Justin snapped.  Grabbing his cane he pushed passed Marcus and walked toward a surprised Kevin.    Marcus knew he had been dismissed.  He was glad he and Brian had mended fences.  He was stopping by there again before going home.  As he walked out he heard Justin apologizing to Kevin for his tone.    

Marcus returned to the main house to find Brian reading on the front porch.   “I knew you would be back.  He shut you down about his leg, didn’t he?”

Marcus was surprised, “Yes, how did you know?”

“It’s my Sunshine.  He is getting scared.  It isn’t getting better.”

“So what is he doing about it?”

“He has an appointment at the end of the week.  He doesn’t know that yet.  I changed the date and he is going to be pissed but I know he would just stress  more about it. I will tell him the night before that we are going somewhere.  If he pushes me I’ll tell him but if I can slip it passed him I wll.  I hate to lie to him but it is for his own peace of mind and his own health.”

“I know everything you do for Justin is what you think is best.” Marcus smiled at him.

“Thanks for that.  I need to make sure he’s around longer than I am.  I know I am not strong enough to do this life on my own. And hell, he’d tell you to take care of me and we’d kill each other.” He laughed as he thought about it.

“Please let me know what happens and if he gets mad let me know and I will try to talk him down. I better get going I have some work to get done and ”

“Let us know when you have the details about Adam.”

“Now it is my turn to say thanks.” Marcus waved as he drove away.

After Justin had apologized to Kevin, he finished what he was working on and left the barn for the day.  Nico came down from his perch upstairs   and asked, “What was that all about? That is not like Justin at all.”

“Marcus asked about his leg.  I hope he does something about it.  It has definitely affected his personality.”

“Do you know what happened to his leg?” 

“All they told me we was it happened in the Outback.”

“And you settled for that?”

“No, I looked it up on the internet.  It’s a long story.  Why don’t you come to my place for dinner tonight and I will tell you the whole story over the amazing wine that is just there.” They both laughed.  “Do you know what time they are eating tonight?”

“I will be at your place about 7:15 or 7:30.  I will let you know when I’m on my way.  And chill plenty of wine.  I am off tomorrow so I can have a couple extra glasses of wine.  I’ll walk over and back.”

“Or use my sofa or share my bed.  No strings but if you are interested….It has been a long dry spell for me. Just throwing it out there but if you don’t want friends with benefits that is fine with me.  I’d love to hear about Italy and your childhood.”

“It’s a date.” Nico kissed both of Kevin’s cheeks before going to the house and start dinner for Brian and Justin.

Justin walked right past Brian without noticing him, “Sunshine?”

“Oh, Brian, sorry.   I …. I had a headache so I decided to come home.  I thought I would just relax for a while.”

Brian let him go in and get settled but after half an hour he followed him in.  He found him lying on the bed with his arm across his forehead. He sat on the edge and placed his hand on the farside of Justin’s waist.  “Sunshine?  What can I do for you?”  He wanted to ask him so many questions but he knew it wasn’t needed right now.

“Leave me alone?”

“That ain’t happening.”

“I figured. Then just hold me.  Don’t talk, just hold me.”

“My pleasure.”  Brian laid down and pulled him into his arms.  He kissed his cheek and stroked his arm until he felt his body relax and he slept.  And Brian laid there and worried about this beautiful man who owned his heart.  Twenty minutes later Brian, who had dozed off, woke to the feel of Justin’s lips on his.  

When Justin saw his eyes open, he softly said, “Thank you.”

“For what, Sunshine?”

“For just holding me.”

“Oh, my love, that is never a problem.”

Justin laughed, “You definitely have a problem not butting in but you know me well enough to know today wasn’t  the day to question.  I’m hungry.  Is it about dinner time?”

“I would guess it will be ready any time,” Brian rolled over, pinning Justin to the mattress and they kissed in a way only old lovers can.  When Brian moved back a bit, he said, “Now we can go check on dinner.”  

It was Justin’s turn to flip Brian and pin him down and they repeated the last action.  Justin smiled at him, “Now, we can go to dinner.”                     

Nico arrived at 7:20.  He had put on a pair of floral pants and a deep rose shirt.  When Kevin opened the door, he nearly began to drool.  He knew Nico was good looking but he was stunning in that color.  He had a bag over his shoulder when he walked in and then tossed it behind the sofa.  “God, it smells good in here.  What are we having?” he walked to the stove and stirred what was in the pan. As Kevin walked up beside him he turned and kissed Kevin’s cheek.  “I needed tonight.” 

“Why don’t you look in the fridge and pull out a bottle of wine.  The corkscrew is on the counter.”  

Nico pulled out a bottle and began to open it.  “So, tell me about Justin’s leg.  They were in the Outback or was it just Justin.”

“The article I read said they were on an extended vacation and they were going to be glamping but on the second night out, the jeep they were in driven by the guide crashed and the guide was killed.  They were lost out there for a long time, like a month.  They both nearly died and although Brian had some injuries, Justin almost lost his leg.  I found some art gallery’s blog that followed his recovery.” Kevin served up the food onto plates and they sat side by side at the counter bar. Nico poured the wine for each of them before Kevin finished, “It’s really been bothering him.”

“I know he has an appointment scheduled but I also overheard Brian rescheduling it for next week.” Nico said as he reached over and wiped off some sauce in the corner of his mouth. He then licked off his finger.  “This is very good.  Thanks for inviting me and thanks for telling me.  That explains a lot.  It makes sense why he is snapping a bit.  He did apologize, didn’t he?”

“Yes, and that was so out of character.  He is not going to be happy that Brian changed his appointment,” Kevin said as he realized how close Nico was to him. He stood up nearly knocking over his stool, “Can I get you more? There's more or we could have dessert.  Would you like dessert or would you like to wait?” As Kevin’s attention was on the pan, he didn’t notice Nico walk up behind him until he felt the arms come around his waist. And then he felt lips on his neck.

“I am good with waiting.  Do you think we can find something to watch?” As Kevin turned, Nico left one arm around his waist.  “What kind of movies do you like? There is a new horror movie that just came out.”

“As long as you don’t mind holding my hand.”

“Gus, if Trenton is doing well enough to live there alone, why does he need you to be there so much?”

“Shel, I just came home an hour later than normal.  Pen needed some supplies and he doesn’t feel comfortable driving yet.”

“And he couldn’t have it delivered? The man is a millionaire.  Hell, he could hire someone to take care of him.”

“Come on, Shelby.  He can’t help the fact his emotions are still off balance.”

“Well, if you know he isn’t really in need just tell him you’ll have something sent over or…”

“Shelly, please!  He moved in here when we needed him.”

“Oh, and that was my fault, wasn’t it.”

“Shelby, of course it wasn’t your fault.  I am just saying that he was willing to help us out for months.  

“I need to get out of here for a while.”  She grabbed her keys. “I’ll be home by midnight.”  

“If you’re just leaving I could have stayed with Pen!” As it came out of his mouth he knew he shouldn’t have said it but it was too late now.

Shelby drove to a spot on the property and watched the sun finish setting and then the tears began to flow. She didn't know why after all these years she was having problems but she wasn’t sure she could do this anymore. Did Gus really need her anymore? The kids were out of the house.  They both had their jobs.  She even spent some time with baby Gabe.  She knew he loved her but what if, because Trent needed him, he decided to…. Had she really hit the age where she had no purpose?  Her head fell on the steering wheel.  

By the time she lifted her head it was completely dark.  She had been sitting here for three hours. She moved on, unsure where she was going. She traveled along some of the vineyard lanes and then she heard a noise and sighed. She looked down and saw the needle on E.  Shit!  Shit, shit, shit! She got out of her car and looked around.  She would just walk home and worry about the car in the morning.  As she walked she realized she was really tired.  Not only mentally but physically.  She decided she would take the road that passed Brian and Justin’s If they had lights on she would borrow the four wheeler to take her home.

Justin and Brian had gone to bed around 10:00 but after they had made love, Justin had fallen asleep but Brian was restless.  He slipped out of bed and after putting on a robe he grabbed a bottle of Jack and went out to the front porch.  He sat in the swing as he sipped out of the bottle.  His mind was on Justin but he realized he heard footsteps.  He expected to see Nico on the path that went through the vineyard but instead he saw someone coming up the road.  It was too dark to see who it was but as it came closer he heard something and soon he realized it was sobbing. It was a woman. Shit, it was Shelby!  Brian couldn’t move as fast as he wanted to in his slippers but he met her on the road and she wrapped her arms tightly around his neck and cried. 

By the time the movie ended, Kevin and Nico were sharing a blanket to hide under.  Kevin started getting up but Nico held him in place, “What is the hurry?”

“I thought you would want dessert.”

Nico looked at him, “I do.” He took the front of Kevin’s shirt and pulled him slowly toward him.  Kevin nearly propelled himself against Nico’s chest and as their lips met, Kevin was already trying to get both of them to their feet. 

“Upstairs,” Kevin managed to get out as he was already grabbing at Nico’s clothes.  

“Slow down.  American’s always in a rush.  I plan to take it very slow.” He kissed Kevin, probing with his tongue as Kevin’s own tongue flirted with it.  They were both out of breath when the separated.  “Bag, I need my bag.”    He grabbed the bag and together they hurried up the steps.       

Brian guided Shelby to the house.  He had her sit on the swing and handed her the bottle of  whiskey before grabbing a blanket out of a bin and wrapping it around her. He sat next to her and pulled her close.  “Sweetheart, what is it?  Where did you come from?  Did you have an accident?”

She tipped the bottle back and then shook her head. “I ran out of gas.”

“Were you coming home from somewhere? I know you came past after work.  I didn’t see you leave again, not that we watch you come and go.”

“Gus and I had a fight.  I just went to ride around for a while.  Brian, I don’t know if I can do this anymore.”

“Do what, Shelby?”

“I just can’t share him anymore.  Trenton just wants more and more of him.  Why would he need me anymore? If Trenton keeps calling him, he is just going to stay.”

“Oh, no, love.  Gus loves you too much.  Trenton has had a major health scare.  Gus wants to be there for him while he recovers but he knows where he belongs.  He couldn’t live without you.  You share children and grandchildren.  Your relationship goes so deep.  He knows where home is.”  As Brian watched Shelby take another swallow of the Jack he realized everything he just said is something Dan would have said to him and had more than once.  Why did he still stress over Justin.  It wasn’t like he went out chasing young ass.  Marcus had been in their lives for more than thirty years.  Marcus would always be a part of their lives but he was no real threat unless he made him one.

“Brian, my head tells me you’re right but my heart is carrying on a battle.  I think it is because Trenton’s personality has changed so much.”

“And it may stay that way but Gus will understand he may need to set new parameters to the relationship. Just give it a little more time.”

Shelby took a deep breath, “Thanks Brian, there has just been so much going on and…. When did I get old enough to be a grandmother.  I love that little boy so much.  I don’t know why it bothers me.”

Brian smiled at her, “Because you’re a woman.” He kissed her.  “Does Gus know where you are?”

“I just left and told him I would be home by midnight.”

“Well, let me grab you keys to my car and you give me your keys.  We’ll take care of your car tomorrow.  We’ll switch back tomorrow night.  Don’t worry, Shelby.  He knows where he belongs.”

“Thank you, Dad.  I love you.”

“Oh, I love you, too, girl.” He hugged her and gave her a kiss and then watched her drive away.

“Brian, what’s going on?” Justin came out leaning on the cane in his hand. “Who just drove away in your car?”

“It was Shelby. Let’s go to bed and I will tell you all about it.”

Shelby glanced at the clock in the car.  It was about 12:15. If Gus had stayed at the house, he would be really worried.  And if he had left, she couldn’t blame him.  She wasn’t sure he had ever been that angry but under the anger she saw confusion, too.  She had put Gus in a place that she knew was beyond his ability to choose.  Telling Gus to choose was like making her decide which of her children she loved the most.  

As she pulled up to the house, Gus rushed out, “Dad, what is it do you know where Shel…. Oh, thank god.” Gus yanked the door open and pulled her into his arms.  “I was so worried.  I was afraid that you… I said things… I didn’t mean I would ever stay at Trenton's. I know it hasn’t been easy.  I promise I won’t come home late again.  If he needs me to stop unplanned I will leave work early.  I…”

Shelby stopped his babbling by kissing him.  She felt him relax and the physical attraction they still had for each other became obvious.  “I’m sorry, Gus.  I shouldn’t have started this at all.  I know Trenton doesn’t mean any of this.  For almost 20 years he has been a part of this marriage and made it clear he believed our family came first but personalities change after a stroke. If he needs more now, I still need you, too.”

“I’m sorry if I have been neglecting you.  Honestly, I am torn,” they walked to the house together.  “By the way, why are you in Pop’s SUV?”

“I ran out of gas. What are you torn about?”

“I don’t want you to be hurt in all this but I know Pen has moments of fear about getting his speech back. He has many uncertain moments, yet, but I can see him getting better in many ways.”  He made her a cup of her favorite tea as she sat on a stool by the counter.  “Tell me about your adventure tonight.  Why didn’t you call me?”  He set the cup of tea in front of her and stood behind her with his arms around her.                        

“I was afraid I’d find out you had gone back to his house.  I couldn’t blame you if you did.  You came home and I left.”

“I have been going crazy here.  You’ve been gone over four hours.” He nuzzled her neck.  “I love you, Shelly.  I don’t want you to ever doubt that.”

“It isn’t just you and Trent.  I just feel like so many things have changed.” She yawned.  “Will you join me in a bath?”  

Gus kissed her softly.  “I’ll go start the water. Then you can tell me where you've been.”

Ten minutes later, Shelby felt Gus’ heart beating under her ear. Gus ran his hands over her breasts and then he began to rub her nipples between his fingers. “Your body is still so amazing. I don’t know how you could ever think I wouldn’t want or need you anymore.” He kissed her neck and then said,  “Where’d you go?”   

“I went up to that spot that has the amazing sunsets.  Of course, I was crying too hard to see it.”

“Oh Shelly,” Gus nuzzled her neck.

“After the sun went down I just drove some of the back roads but then I ran out of gas.  I was on the edge of the property.  It was a long walk and as I walked I pictured you with Trent and I know you love….” She took in a deep breath as Gus moved a hand from one of her breasts to her clit.  “I know you love him and pictured at his house and I didn’t blame you.”  She turned so Gus could kiss her and her whole body shivered as a gentle orgasm ran through her body. “Well, Brian was on the porch.  We talked.  He can be an ass but he is a genuine, caring, lovable ass. Anyway, he said they would take care of my car tomorrow and I will use his car to go to work and we can switch back then.”

“What did you talk about ...with Pops?”

“Nothing and everything. What are you going to do if Trenton doesn’t get better? If he stays so unpredictable?”

”The doctor says it could be days or months for him to come back but he may never come back to my sweet Pen.”  Gus’ voice trailed off as he thought about the gentle man he was in love with. 

“I know you are hurting, too.  That’s what made me feel so bad when I pulled myself together. Do you think we can still make love in the bathtub?”

“I think we definitely should find out.”

“So, what was Shelby doing here without a car so late at night?” Justin asked as he pressed against Brian’s long body and kissed him.

“She is just working through a few things and this Trent situation is hard on her. She had taken a ride for some air and ran out of gas.  I told her we would go get the car tomorrow.”

“I have been worried about them.  I know the love is there but the Trenton situation has to be putting stress on all of them.”

“Yes, but they’ll make it. I have no doubt they’ll work it out.”

“I agree and we’ll be here while they work through it.  Now, we need to sleep. Well, at least I do.” Justin snuggled up to Brian and he instinctively pulled him in close.  

Nico and Kevin looked at the stars through the skylight above the bed. “I think you have done that a few times.”  Kevin said as his fingers ruffled the hair on Nico’s chest.

“I am Italian, what did you expect? And you are no novice.” He brought his palm to his mouth and kissed it.  “So do you think our hosts are as beautiful as I do?”

“They are every gay boys fantacy at one point or another.  Those paintings Justin did of the two of them…..they were stunning.  They still are in a more mature way.”

“I know I would let either of them fuck me all day long, although my guess is they have slowed a bit.”

“Yes, but their passion is still so evident,” Kevin’s hand moved down to Nico’s growing cock.  

“I have read that Justin was in high school and Brian used to sleep with hundreds of men a year.”

Kevin moved and brought his mouth to Nico’s nipple and bit lightly. “Do you think they ever made home movies?”

“I don’t know but I can promise you I will be looking while I clean.” With that Nico flipped Kevin and pinned him to the mattress as he put one of his legs up on his shoulder.  

Shelby and Gus were up with the sun but both of them felt a little lighter.  They both agreed Gus would have dinner with Trenton tonight so they could have a conversation.  When he arrived Pen met him at the door. “I am so glad you are here. I was worried you weren’t coming.” All of this spilled out of the tablet.Gus bought for him that was made specifically to speak for someone.

“First of all, Pen,” he kissed his lover, “I make my own decisions but Shelby does understand.  Yes, she is struggling with this but she loves you and me.” He slipped an arm around Trenton and they walked into the house.  “Something smells good.  You have been cooking.”

“For my love,” Pen struggled to get it out.

“Did your therapist come today?”

“Canceled.  Headache.” He typed into his tablet.

“Trenton, you can’t cancel that.  It is important to you getting back to normal.”

“I”m normal!” the tablet spewed.

“Oh, Pen, I didn’t mean it that way.  I just mean I know how much you hate feeling reliant on others and if you cancel therapy that isn’t going to happen.”  Gus looked over and Pen and saw tears rolling down his cheeks.  “Oh, Trenton,” Gus wrapped his arms around him.

“Sorry, Gussy,” he stumbled through the words.

“I know you hate this.  I do.  Is dinner ready?  I do need to go home tonight but we have time for a nice dinner.”

After dinner, they had a conversation, well Gus talked.  He asked Trent to not cancel any more therapy sessions.  Trenton promised he wouldn’t but Gus knew no matter what he said, he may forget it tomorrow. 

“I really should go now,” Gus kissed him.

“Half hour?”  the tablet asked.

“I think we can find something to do for thirty minutes.” They were on the sofa and soon they were laying side by side and the next minute, Gus was sound asleep.   

It was after midnight when Gus woke up, “Oh, shit!  I have to get out of here.  Shelby is going to be furious! Damn!” Gus was pulling on his shoes and rushing to straighten his clothes. “This can’t happen.  I love you but I can’t risk my marriage for you.”  Gus saw Trenton crumble at his words.

“Oh, Pen, I am so sorry.  It isn’t your fault.  I have to get out of here.  I will text in the morning.”  With that Gus rushed out of the house.

Shelby was understanding, knowing neither of them had gotten much sleep last night and she just kissed him goodnight when he fell into bed.  As they got ready for work in the morning, Gus texted Pen with no response.  Gus told her how he scared awake and said things he shouldn’t.  The old Trent would shrug it off but he hoped he hadn’t taken it to heart.

As the day went on Gus texted Trent several times with no response.  He finally called his dads.  “Hey, Gus, what’s up?”

“Pops, do you have time to run to Trent’s?”

“Sure, what’s up?”

“I’m not sure.  That’s the problem. I fell asleep there last night and left about midnight.  I said a couple things the old Trent would have shrugged off but …..I have been trying to get ahold of him all day and he hasn’t responded.”

“I’ll drive over and call or text when I talk to him.”

“Thanks, Pops.”

Brian stopped by the barn and saw Justin leaning on a chair as he painted on a huge canvas.  He pulled him into his arms not caring if he got paint on him or not.  Kevin and Nico both watched the mature men embrace.  Kevin smiled up at him and quickly went back to work as the men separated.  Brian told Justin what he was up to and then he was gone.

Brian drove up to Trenton’s house.  He made note he should try to stop by at least once a week.  He could see he might get lonely up here even though he knew Trent was very private.  He walked to the house and knocked.  There was no answer. He walked around the house and looked in windows and tried the doors.  He was afraid if he did more he would set off his alarm system.  He called Gus, “Gus, he’s not answering the door.  Is there a way I can get into the house?”

“Just a second,” moment’s later he said, “I disarmed the system.  Where are you?”

“I’m by the French doors into the living room.” He barely had the words out and he heard a click on the door. 

“I just opened the door with my app.  I’m staying on until you let me know you found him napping in his room.” Gus was no longer relaxed.  What was going on.  He could hear Brian walk around the house. 

It seemed like hours rather than minutes when Brian came back on the phone, “Gus, he’s not here.  It appears he packed a suitcase and left.”

“Left!  Pops where would he go?”

“I’m not sure, son, but he isn’t here and there isn’t a note.  I checked.”

“Oh, god, Pops, look around.  I yelled last night.  It upset him.  What if he….”

Brian looked around the house, “Daniel’s where did you go? If you hurt my son you’ll pay for it.  If you didn’t kill yourself I might just do it for you!”