The Letters

Chapter 8 (April-May)

June 3, 2022

Most Reverend Colm O’Hara

Bishop of St Anthony’s RC Church

Pittsburgh, PA

Your Excellency,

I believe I have come to a decision but as I promised you, I will take the full year before making my intentions known. While I am enjoying my time off, it dawned on me that I’ve been sheltering myself here on the lane almost as if I was in a monastery. I spend most of the mornings in solitude and in prayer in my little cabin. Then the rest of the time I’m either reading or doing simple chores. How am I to learn about the world if I’m looking at it from the outside and not participating in it on a daily basis?

John and his mother own a farm which over the years has become a retreat or halfway house for troubled youth, young men and women, boys and girls that have found themselves in legal trouble. They’re at the fork in their lives where choosing the wrong path could lead them to incarceration. I have decided to offer my services to The Farm, as it is called, as a counselor of sorts. I am qualified, my education and experiences do qualify me, and it may allow me to continue God’s work. John and his mother both agree, as does her husband Steve who is in charge of the Farm. I’ve already spent a few days there. The work is challenging but if we can save just one child then the work is so worthwhile.

On a more personal note Lady Lucie and Beau appear to be settling in as Lady and Lord of the lane. Beau has been squiring around his new mate, showing her the lay of the land, so to speak. I see them trotting up and down the lane, exploring the terrain and marking their territory. I’m laughing as I write these words. Beau and Lucie gave Emmett quite a fright the morning of the lane’s Memorial weekend barbecue.

Emmett had entered Brian’s cottage very early Saturday morning...

Yours,

Tom

*****

“Helllooo....YAAAAAAAA!” Emmett shrieked loud enough to wake the dead. Fortunately all of Edna’s Treasures was already awake. He stood in fear as two sets of doggy eyes stared back at him. Lady Lucie had bright golden brown eyes which were totally focused on the heaving tall queen who was quaking in fear in the sun porch.

“Um, help? Anybody?” Emmett squeaked, barely daring to breathe let alone move. Beau sat, finding it amusing in his doggy way, and let his new love defend their home from the dreaded party planner.

“Ouch, what was that for?” Brian groused as he rubbed his arm. Justin had given Brian a light smack. The family was all in the kitchen having breakfast when Emmett barged through the sun porch door announcing himself to the world.

“For not warning Emmett about Lucie,” Justin said back. The men around the table were all snickering and not just at Brian. “You’re all just as bad,” Justin admonished.

“Yeah and what about you, Sunshine?” Brian snarked. “I don’t see you running out there to save the big fairy from the pack of wolves,” he said smugly.

“He’s got you there, Justin,” John said in Brian’s defense.

“I’ve been busy,” Justin mumbled into his coffee, a blush pinking up his creamy face.

“Yeah, yeah, tell us another one,” Bobby chuckled. The kids wisely remained silent as their parents were engaging in a test of wills. Tom, who was also there for breakfast, decided it was more fun to watch the drama unfold rather than participate in it.

“Help!” they all heard from the porch.

When someone began to growl, John stood from the table, shouted out a command then led the troops into the porch.

“Finally!” Emmett exclaimed as he held a hand to his chest. “I thought I was going to be eaten,” he said in between heavy breaths.

“She’s only playing with you,” John explained. He looked at the two large dogs who were both sitting quietly, waiting for John’s next command.

“Playing? Being considered as someone’s breakfast is not my idea of playing,” Emmett protested. Brian snorted at the histrionics and the innuendo.

“Let me introduce you. Lucie, come here, girl,” John continued as he ignored the comments.

Lucie stood and took a few steps closer to John. She looked up at him with love and admiration. John smiled at the beautiful shepherd who was learning her role on the lane and fitting in very nicely. Lucie had a sweet disposition but was fiercely protective of them all. And let it be known to anyone who dared to get close to their gate. He squatted down and gave the dog a loving pat.

“Emmett, this is Lady Lucie. Lucie for short. We decided...”

“You decided,” Brian grumbled, interrupting the procedures.

“Beau decided,” John amended, “that he needed a mate. Lucie’s been with us for about a month.” Bree came over to give the dog a hug. She giggled when Lucie slurped at her face.

“See, Auntie Emm, Lucie’s very nice. She won’t hurt you,” Bree promised.

“Well, okay then,” Emmett mumbled as he held out his hand for Lucie to inspect. He remembered when he first met Beau. Beau was just as fierce looking if not more. Lucie sniffed at Emmett then gave his hand a hesitant lick. Judging Emmett to be safe and worthy of attention, Lucie reared up on her hind legs and placed her front paws on Emmett’s chest nearly knocking the man down.

“I guess she likes me,” Emmett said with a sloppy grin as he was slobbered on. Everyone laughed as Lucie continued her assault. Beau barked with pride.

“Down,” John commanded and Lucie immediately sat down.

“Well, I think I’ll just go home and take another shower,” Emmett said a bit flustered and wet from dog spit. “But I’ll be back to organize the day,” he warned giving Brian a poignant look.

“I’ll notify The Times,” Brian snarked as he turned to go back to the kitchen. He was in desperate need of more coffee.

*****

“Who the fuck is that?!” Debbie’s shrill voice bounced against the sun porch walls. Everyone within shouting distance turned to see the ‘who’ Debbie was referring to. It turned out to be Lady Lucie.

“That’s Beau’s wife, Grandma Deb,” Bree explained. Bree patted her hand against her leg a couple of times. Lucie loped over then sat next to the petite child. Lucie was almost as tall as Bree. Bree buried her hand in the thick cream colored fur.

“Oh, I didn’t realize Beau needed a wife,” Debbie said a little more calmly, trying to get with the program. The lane was changing, growing, as were the children of her boys. Deb looked around the porch, at all the families represented and smiled.

“Get thee a companion,” Tom mumbled to himself with a smirk as he stood to the side of the porch watching family interactions.

As predicted by John, the weather was not going to cooperate. The boys set up large tents and each table had oversized umbrellas so that whoever wanted to sit outside could and still stay dry. Again, there were tables set up in the greenhouse and the yard of the B&B. One of the tents was set up close to the sun porch door giving one protection from the drizzling rain as they walked in and out. The temperature was warm; the family was together so no one cared much about the rain.

*****

Michael stood in the doorway of the largest tent set up behind the conjoined cottages and stared out into the yard at Edna’s Treasures. He had a rather sour look on his face as Carl came up behind him.

“Want something to eat, Michael?” Carl asked cheerfully. He was carrying a plate of snacks for himself and Debbie.

“No, I had a burger a while ago.”

“Are you feeling okay?” Carl asked as he studied the slightly turned away face of his stepson. Michael hadn’t even bothered to look at him.

“I’m fine.”

“You aren’t acting like you’re fine,” Carl corrected him. “What’s so fascinating out there?” Carl peered around Michael not sure what the man was looking at.

“Nothing,” Michael replied sullenly.

“Michael, you can’t kid a kidder. What is wrong with you?”

Michael heaved a sigh. “Look at them … holding hands under the table.”

“Look at who?” Carl asked with a frown. He tried to discern what was upsetting Michael. All he saw was Tom and Todd sitting under one of the big umbrellas. Then he let his eyes come down and look below the level of the tabletop. Sure enough, the two men were holding hands. “What’s your problem?” Carl asked. “We all know that Reverend Tom is gay, and I don’t think there was ever any doubt about Todd in that department.”

“But Tom’s a priest, and … they’re acting like this is the most normal thing in the world,” Michael protested. “They look like lovers. He took vows.”

“I’d say they were being very discreet,” Carl observed.

“They shouldn’t be doing that at all,” Michael declared.

“What are you talking about?” Carl asked in bewilderment.

“Tom came here to figure out if he wanted to stay in the church. Todd should be staying out of it until Tom makes that decision.”

“I don’t think we can always dictate how and what is going to happen.”

“They need to learn … restraint.”

“Who does?” Ben asked as he came up behind them. “What are you two doing?” He had been watching them for several minutes.

“Your husband seems to think that blossoming love is a bad thing,” Carl stated. “Maybe you can talk some sense into him. I haven’t been able to.” Carl strode away, deciding to look for his wife and deliver the plate of snacks he was still holding.

“What was that all about?” Ben asked turning Michael towards him so that he could look into the brown eyes that he loved.

Michael shook his head and looked down at the grass beneath his feet. “It’s … not important.”

“I think it’s very important,” Ben said placing his hand under Michael’s chin and pressing it up so that Michael was forced to look into his eyes. “If something’s bothering you, I want to know.”

“It’s Father Tom … and Todd.”

“What about them?”

“I … I think they’re getting serious.”

“Serious?” Ben asked.

“Yeah, about each other. They’re out there holding hands.”

“And that’s a bad thing?” Ben asked staring at his husband.

“Well yes! Tom’s a priest. He hasn’t given up on the church yet. He should be alone while he makes that decision, not making goo-goo eyes at another man.”

“Michael … Tom is a grown man. He can make his own decisions. He and Todd will do whatever they want,” Ben tried to explain. “It has nothing to do with you.”

“It has everything to do with me, and the children on this lane – JR and Bree and Patrick and Taylor. What kind of an example is this setting for them?”

“It’s setting an example about being true to yourself, and not staying in a bad situation when you know deep inside that it’s no longer right for you. Sometimes people have to make hard decisions so that they can live the rest of their lives doing what they truly want to do, not staying locked up in a situation that is … safe … but doesn’t make them happy.”

“Happiness isn’t all it’s cracked up to be,” Michael blurted out.

“What? What are you saying? Michael, listen to yourself.”

“I … I just think it’s wrong. I think Tom should go someplace else to find himself. I’m going to tell Brian that, and have him sent away.” Michael brushed past his husband intent on looking for Brian to carry out his threat.

“You will do no such thing,” Ben said grabbing Michael’s arm and stopping him in his tracks.

“Ow!” Michael responded as Ben’s grip tightened. “Let me go.”

“Michael, stay out of this,” Ben warned. He let go of Michael’s arm.

“Not this time,” Michael said striding away.

Ben watched his husband and was tempted to go after him and stop him, but he thought better of that. Brian would put Michael straight, and probably in no uncertain terms.

*****

“Brian, I need to talk to you,” Michael said curtly as he marched up to Brian who was getting his grills ready for the bonanza of steaks, chicken, burgers and hotdogs that he would cook for the hungry hordes at dinnertime.

“So talk,” Brian said barely glancing up.

“I want Father Tom off the lane,” Michael stated in no uncertain terms.

“What?” Brian asked turning to look at Michael with disbelief. “What the fuck are you talking about?”

“He should be somewhere that he can sort out his head,” Michael explained, “but this isn’t the place.”

“Why the fuck not?”

“He’s a priest and he’s breaking all his vows right here in front of everybody,” Michael said crossing his arms on his chest. He glared at Brian defiantly daring him to contradict what he was saying.

“Tom is on sabbatical. At the moment he’s not a priest,” Brian replied calmly, a calm that he was not feeling. Michael could come to the god-damnedest conclusions. It was enough to drive a sane man mad.

“You can’t just stop being a priest,” Michael protested. The vein in his forehead was throbbing. He had expected Brian to support what he wanted.

“Of course you can. History is riddled with defrocked priests and married former priests.”

“I don’t care about history,” Michael sputtered. “I don’t want him presenting a bad example for the children on the lane, and that’s what he and Todd are doing.”

“They like each other. And Bree loves Tom. He’s her Uncle Thomas.”

“What? Like I’m her Uncle Michael?”

“Exactly.”

“This, this is … unbelievable.” Michael’s eyes had gotten very large and he looked like he was about to explode.

“Michael, calm down. I’m not going to ask Tom to leave. He’s welcome here, and so is Todd, together or separately,” Brian stated leaving no room for doubt.

“You … you’re making a big mistake.”

“I don’t think so,” Brian said with a sigh. “Tom is fine here, and the kids are fine. Just leave it alone.”

“I don’t think that would be wise.”

“Mikey,” Brian said gently, “trust me on this one. Can you do that?”

Michael shook his head, but when Brian slung his arm over his shoulders and bussed his temple, Michael gave in, even though he still thought it was wrong to have the priest and his boyfriend on their lane.

*****

In between raindrops, Seth and Jennifer strolled under the arbor to the entrance to the greenhouse. They stood in awe of the pure beauty of the tropical oasis as they entered.

“I still don’t know how he does this,” Jennifer whispered as her eyes swept over the varieties of flowers that were in full bloom.

“I’m having a difficult time reconciling the man from all those stories I’ve been told to the man that has the patience and talent to cultivate these delicate flowers,” Seth said.

“I know. I remember that Brian. I hated that Brian sometimes; blamed him for what happened to Justin. But that man, if he does still exist, is nothing in comparison to the man he’s become. A loving partner, a fiercely devoted father and still a shark when it comes to business,” Jennifer said as she and Seth walked toward the koi pond.

They stopped when they heard voices. Todd and Tom were sitting next to the pond quietly talking and smiling lovingly at each other with slightly goofy expressions. Jennifer and Seth did an about face then walked to the other side of the greenhouse.

“What do you think about that?” Jennifer asked her husband.

“Think about what?”

“Tom and Todd?”

“I think when two people are lucky enough to find each other then who are we to judge,” Seth said wisely as he took Jennifer’s chin in his hand and lifted it. He gazed into her lovely eyes then gave her a kiss.

“We were lucky to start over later in life. Not that I was ready for the old folks home, mind you, but you’re right. I feel very lucky to have met you,” Jenn agreed.

“Even if we did have some help,” Seth smirked, their help being one Brian A. Kinney. “But you’re still not convinced.”

“No, that’s not it. I’m not sure how I feel. He married us, he baptized Bree; I guess I still look at him and see the priest.”

“The way you look at Brian and still see the man who they called the stud?” Seth said gently.

“You’re right. Brian’s changed; he grew and matured into someone I never thought could exist. He’s far from being a saint,” Jennifer chuckled. “But it wouldn’t be fair to continually judge him on his behavior from twenty years ago. Tom is a good man, an honorable man. If he’s decided to pursue his heart and has found love then he has my support. True love, sustaining love is too hard to find.” Jennifer smiled up at her husband.

They kissed then quietly left the greenhouse.

*****

“We haven’t been out here for a while,” Raphael commented as he and Hector walked off their heavy meal. They were just passing Michael’s cabin, the sun was trying to peak out from behind the clouds. They stood in front of the new cabin, admiring the construction and the gardens.

“Do you think if we asked Brian, he might build us a cabin?” Hector teased.

Raphael laughed. “He does have room for a few more houses, doesn’t he?” Raphael agreed. “I like the B&B. I wouldn’t mind spending some time there.”

“You would?” Hector asked.

“Perhaps a week, just to recharge. Curtis would probably be bored to tears but he’s a big boy. He could stay home. We haven’t had a real vacation in years,” Raphael stated.

“True. I remember we used to take off any time we wanted.”

“That was a long time ago. Now I’d just like some quiet where I could sleep as long as I like and not have an agenda or itinerary,” Raph said with a sigh.

“Then I think we should ask Brian. Let’s book some time here. We can afford a week or two off. None of our clients would begrudge us that. Besides, you know plenty of covering vets,” Hector added.

“So we’re agreed when we get back to the cottage we ask Brian,” Raph said with a smile.

“Ask Brian what?” Todd inquired as he and Tom came out of the B&B front door.

“We were thinking of asking Brian if he’d mind if we stayed here for a couple weeks. We realized that neither of us has had a vacation in several years. And we thought this is the perfect place for a quiet retreat,” Raphael explained.

“If you’re looking for peace and quiet, this is the place for it,” Tom agreed. “The quiet atmosphere has been very helpful in allowing me to make some decisions about my life.”

“And have you, made some decisions?” Raphael asked taking Tom’s arm and leading him slightly away from Hector and Todd.

Tom looked up at Raphael.

“It’s no secret that you’re on sabbatical. Can I make an assumption that you’re contemplating a more secular life or perhaps a life in a church that is a bit more accepting of your true self?” Raphael said with candor.

“Yes. Why do I get the impression you know exactly what I’m feeling?”

“Because in my family, I was the one who was supposed to become the priest. When I left the seminary my family disowned me. I still have little contact with them.”

“I’m so sorry,” Tom said.

“There’s no need to be sorry. I’ve been extremely blessed with a new family, and if I can trust my eyes, you’ve been blessed as well.”

“Yes, I believe I have, but we haven’t, uh…” Tom blushed, unable to find the words.

“Consummated your new relationship?” Raph offered. Tom nodded. “You’re waiting then?”

“Yes. I respect Todd too much. It wouldn’t be fair to him.”

“Or to yourself. I’m not sure if I’d have your strength to wait knowing that I have someone who loved me waiting for me as much as Todd seems to love you.”

“Do you think he loves me?” Tom asked in astonishment.

“Yes,” Raphael said with a smile. They stopped just before entering the cottage garden to wait for Hector and Todd. “Good luck to you, Tom. I hope you follow your heart,” Raphael advised as he wrapped his arm around Hector’s waist. The two couples then entered the garden, stepping back into the fray of the family.

*****

“Bree, I’m getting thirsty. Can we go back to the cottage now?” Ashley asked her best friend. They had gone to play in the Wendy house for a while.

“Okay,” Bree said. They cleaned up the playhouse then closed the doors as they left. They were about to start up the path back to the cottage when Bree heard a lot of growling noises.

“Is that a bear?” Ashley asked a bit scared.

“I don’t know,” Bree replied turning toward the noise. Bree took a couple of steps toward the growling.

“No, Bree,” Ashley whispered as she reached out to stop her best friend. “Let’s go get your dads,” Ashley pleaded.

“Wait,” Bree said as she slowly walked toward the noise. Ashley stood frozen to the spot as Bree disappeared behind a clump of trees.

“Bree, come back!” Ashley whispered louder, uncertain what to do for her friend. “I’m going for help,” she said making a decision then taking off for the cottage.

Bree crept closer to the noise even though she was scared. She thought it sounded like Beau but she wasn’t sure. The growling became louder and then Bree heard little yipping noises as well. She peeked around a large tree to see Beau sort of attacking Lucie. Bree’s eyes grew wide as Beau pawed Lucie nipping at her neck. Bree backed away then ran full blast back to the cottage nearly crashing into Tom and Todd.

“Holy Smokes!” Todd shouted as he jumped back startled watching Bree streak by and into the sun porch shouting for her dads. “What was that?” he asked Tom.

“Not a clue,” Tom answered. “But I think we’re about to find out,” he said seeing Brian, Justin and John run out of the porch, heading towards the Wendy house and beyond.

A few minutes later three very flustered men walked backed to the porch. John was shaking his head and waving his hands in the air. They heard Justin say, “She’s your daughter.” And Brian growl back, “She’s your daughter too.”

“Okay, I’m confused,” Todd declared. Tom snickered when he realized what Bree may have seen.

“Oh boy,” was all that Tom could say.