CHAPTER 22 - WHO'S FOOLED WHO AND TEAMING UP

LINDSAY AND BRIAN’S BROWNSTONE - EARLY AFTERNOON

MANNING

“Uncle George, I will give you and the others a tour later. Brian, Michael and I…”

“Lindz, which room are Justin and I sharing?” Michael exaggerates a yawn. “We’d like to freshen up.”

“We can't.” Justin drawls, trying not to check out Brian’s ass.

“Why not?” Michael huffs .

“There’s no room…” George answers. “...unless he bunk in with Brian…”

“Who’s bunking in with me?” He looks up from checking the post. 

“Uncle George. Justin can…”

“Excuse, Ma’am…” I interject. “...where am I supposed to sleep and be of service to you?”

“What do you mean?” She scowls.

“As George, Kiki, Debs, Daphne, Ted, Blake, Mel and Emmett are occupying the lower floors, that leaves my room for Michael…”

“Who decided that?” The pricklepuss spits.

“I did.” Brian replies. “Who’s bunking in with me?”

“Daphne has her own place…”

“It’s three nights. I need to maximise my work time before we go to Tribeca…”

“Tribeca?! We’ve just gotten home…” She caterwauls. “...I wanted to decompress for a week or so.”

“And what is stopping you from doing that?” George demands. “Brian, Justin, Daphne, Emmett and I are going there on business. You’re not necessary.”

He holds up his hands as she starts working herself into a fit of pissiness. “Lindz, please don’t…”

“Oh, I’m Lindz now, am I?! You’re Brian Asshole Kinney to me! These last few weeks have been nothing but turbulence and abandonment…”

“Brian, you also seem to have forgotten…” Michael glares. “...this isn’t your home. Lindz decides who she has as guests.”

“Thank you, and well said, Michael. You will not work from my home. Daphne goes to her place. Michael will use that room instead.”

“So you have a quarter of a million dollars available right now?” We turn to the door. Looking very chipper indeed is Desmond, her former senior attorney.  

“Excuse…”

“Quiet, Lil Miss Park Avenue!” Desmond hisses. “The reason for my presence is in here…” He strides over with an envelope. “...read that and screech.” She glares at him. “I can read it out loud for you.”

She reaches for Michael. “This is your fault, Brian! If you had just spent some time with me so we could discuss this alone, or come home when I wanted to, I would not be faced with this!” The paper drops to the floor as she sobs in his arms.

“What’s going on, Desmond?” Brian sighs, picking it up.

“By leaving the property empty for more than six weeks, she becomes liable for the mortgage, which is three million dollars a year. So how is this his fault?” His growl reverberates. “All you had to do was come home. Despite knowing this consequence, you chose to stay.”

“How could she be expected to come home with all that trauma?!” Michael exclaims. “As for it being his fault; Lindz, you said you told him when you signed the paper, but you didn’t think he took it on board. Clearly he didn’t.” He gently places her in a seat like she’s Dresden china! “So you should step up to the plate.”

“Michael, what are you on about?” Justin scowls.

“We two have gotten close over these last few weeks. He has been living here rent free for years. He has the capacity to pay, don’t you think it’s about time he did, Lindz?” 

“He’s right, Brian, I did tell you. This is not something I wouldn't talk to you about.”

“Don’t you two just love spending other people’s money?” Desmond snipes. “He can’t; it states the leaseholder, which is her. And since you admit to knowing about it, you know the rest of the consequences, which is immediate removal.”

DAPHNE

“Brian, please, I can’t lose my mother’s home.”

Desmond slaps the armrest. “Simply pay the mortgage and this goes away!”

“I don’t have the money for that long term, the best I can do is a couple of years.”

“What do you want me to do?” He sighs.

“You should pay the mortgage.” Michael declares. “Obviously!”

“What about the household account?” Justin gets between him and them. “He's been paying into that, which is in both names. You can use that, couldn't she, Desmond?”

“How do you know about it?!” Lindsay colours up.

“Brian and I have gotten close, and have been talking too.” 

”So that’s settled? We use that and I’m put on the lease going forward. So you pay next year, Lindsay.”

“That is doable, thank…”

“Or I take over the lease and you have the same arrangement that I had?”

“Oh, that’s even better!” She squeals. “Let’s go and sign it over now!”

“We need a witness.”

“Michael will be mine.” She declares. They rush ahead, chattering like crows.

“Okay, Mel, can you go with him?” She follows, shaking her head. “Brian, we’ve got that text you were waiting for. What should I tell him?” 

“Hurry up and answer her so I can save my home!” Lindsay glowers. 

“No deal.”

TWO HOURS LATER

LINDSAY

I flash Michael a tired but triumphant smile. We're in the lounge, the signing took forever. Although I had known about the clause, I hadn’t realised we’d been away so long. I wanted exactly the same lease that I had signed with my mother and stepfather, however, Melanie kept objecting to everything. It makes no difference as I shall continue as I have always done. 

“Ah, Lindsay, there you are.” Uncle George enters. “We need to talk about a few things, like the Asteridge Dinner. Are you going to help as you said?”

“Of course.” 

“So what do you think you can offer that Emmett can’t?”

“Lindz has more art experience than him...” Michael advises. “…he's just an overbearing personal….”.

“We’ll see you later, Michael.” He opens the door, we're both confused. “I have privileged information about the dinner, so…”

“Michael will be there.” I protest.

“As a guest, just, but the behind the scenes stuff he is not to be privy to unless he signs an NDA.”

“I’ll sign one!” He declares.

“Oh, great.” He sighs. “I’ll have Claudia send two over. In the meantime, I need to speak to Lindsay alone.”

“Fine, I’ll go make sure Daphne has moved out of that room..”

Uncle George closes the door sharply. “Reign in his cockiness! Why have you foisted this fiscal responsibility on Brian?”

“I did not foist, he offered!”

“Bullshit. However, since I don’t think you will honour the mortgage next year, I will take it now and hold it in a separate account until such time as it is due.”

“Uncle George, we have a joint account. I'll deposit it there. I know that I’ve come across as a little spoilt…”

“A little?!”

“I am used to a certain way of things; you have to allow me an adjustment…”

“But you won’t adjust as the quarter million dollar fine shows.” I sit up. “What’s wrong?”

“My fines were $160,000, not a quarter million.” 

“Interest was added. So what about the shares, do you want to keep them?” I shrug. “Ted, could you come in please?!”

“You have a 10% stake.” He walks and talks. “You can’t inflict anything like the damage you just did to Brian.” 

“I will sell them then.” I declare. 

“Transfer, not sell.” Ted clips out.

“I am not giving them away for nothing!” 

TED

“Why are you being such a disappointing little madam?!” George fumes. “You and Michael bear trapped Brian into taking this off you…” She barely hides her smirk. “...not sure when you concocted it.” Her indifferent smugness is so irritating. “That clause was your stepfather’s idea. This final one is from…”

“Uncle George…” She waves away his words. “...Brian is my best friend; I wouldn't do anything to hurt him.”

“I am so glad to hear that.” Brian strolls in with Daph, Justin, Ems and, forcing himself in once again, Michael. “Have you got some gum, Lindz?”

“It’s in my purse.” She stretches along the sofa. “Pass it, so I can get it for you.”

“Don’t you trust me?” 

“You know I do, help yourself.” 

“Oh, by the way, you never told me about the clause.” He drops her purse at her feet.

“Does it matter? Since it’s worked out now.” She rummages in her purse. “Can you hold this Michael?” She gives him a mirror and with his obsequious and cack handed assistance proceeds to primp and preen. “There, much better, thank you Michael.” She turns her cow eyes on Brian. “I would never lie to you, Bri. Come and sit down…” She has to nudge Michael again. “…you look exhausted. Are you sure this work can't wait?”

BRIAN 

“Michael, keep your place. I’m done with work, what I was waiting for came through early.” 

“Great, so we can spend quality time…”

“Daph, you need to book a table for…” I do a headcount. “…everyone and book cars for dinner around 9.30 at Ophelia Lounge..”

“Good grief, what are we going there for?!” George exclaims.

“I’ve just made $90 million!” I rest against the table, enjoying the incredulous silence. “I’m serious, they came up with it.”

“Holy fuck!” Daph squeals. “Ems, you know that deal I told you about as some history about Brian?” He nods before sweeping me into a backbreaking hug, I happily accept. “We need to go shopping! Ems, you and I are going to go to mine! I have a jacket but you need to…”

“Daph, stop babbling!” I laugh. “Manning, bring it in, please!” 

He, Vic and Flick bring in champagne and glasses. Lindsay frowns. “Where did you get that from, Manning?”

“The cellar. Brian asked me to chill...” 

Her eyes narrow. “I‘ve told you about this familiarity before.”

“Lindsay.” George smiles. “Manning no longer answers to you. He came with the brownstone, so Brian’s his boss now.” Whatever she was going to say, the elbow from Michael stops her. “Manning, please do your new master’s bidding!”

FORTY MINUTES LATER

TED

Lindsay's glowering at George; he’d insisted that we all talk before we celebrate anything. Whilst we - me, Daph, Brian, Justin, her and George - have been waiting for some paperwork to come through, everyone else is getting ready. She wanted Michael to stay, but George refused on ‘fuck all to do with him’ grounds, I thought George was going to claw his eyes out when he crowed he’d find out later anyway!

“Is that it?” She grouses as his laptop chimes. “I really don’t see why this couldn't wait for tomorrow.”

“Lindsay, you’re not the only one being held up.” Justin glares. “I’d rather be somewhere else too!” Brian blows him a discreet kiss, which only just mollifies him.

“Yes, this is it. So, Brian please explain this wonderful news!”

“Due to an NDA, we really can’t go into the intricacies of…”

“I can sign that alongside the one Claudia is sending.” She piles her hair up. “I’ve got the most darling earrings in mind for dinner - let’s talk afterwards Brian.”.

“We, as in Daph and I, can’t say anything and speak to Michael about your earrings, since you two have gotten so close.” She’s stunned into silence. “I sold a business. I've every intention of spreading my joy about that amongst the people I love. So the first thing that’s happening is I’m giving Justin $15 million to put into the business…”

“Brian…” Justin blinks rapidly. “…you don’t have…”

“Yes I do.” He hands him a handkerchief. “I want to continue Ronald’s legacy on Liberty Avenue. George, you and I will work with Debs, Kiki and Justin to bring to fruition the regeneration plans that he and Jennifer discussed? I think the sooner we...”

“We’ll also need Michael, we’d love to help with this! Let me go and get him!”

“This is a family matter, which you two aren’t where Jennifer is concerned.” George growls, more stunned silence from her, suppressed giggles from the rest of us. “Brian, please continue.”

“Um, uh, okay. So Daph, I’ve given you a bonus...”

DAPH

“You shithead!” I exclaim. Everyone is astonished but he is chuckling. “I thought that was a business tactic. You were serious?!”

“Dead serious, you’ve more than earned it putting up with everything and everyone that’s in my life.”

“Wait!” I turn to a nervous looking Ted. “You knew! Is this why you’re here?!”

“Partly. I knew you were getting a bonus plus Blake and I were due for a NYC trip. Brian has tasked me with making sure you invest properly and the like…”

“Congratulations, Daphne, isn't that nice for you; see what rewards you reap when you knuckle down?” Lindsay condescends. “What little thing do you think you’ll treat yourself to?”

“She can buy a lot of little things with twenty five million…” Brian grins. “...you’re allowed one blow-out.”

“How much?!” She and I shriek.

“Twenty five million. As the board members, we voted, she won.”

“Wow.” I breathe. “So I’ve never been so happy to be fourth in my life!”

“Fourth? What do you mean?” Lindsay scowls.

“In this current money league…” I giggle. “...after George, Brian and Justin…”

“You’re fifth, lower than me again.” She smarms.

I push down my retort, I’m determined to enjoy this! “Ooh, I can buy my place!” 

“Brian said it's almost overflowing…” Justin guffaws. “...you’d need somewhere bigger!”

“And how would you know that Brian?” She’s almost foaming.

“Her shopping tends to come to the office…” He chuckles, she scowls. “...I’ve been pressed into helping her get it home. Four trips it took us in the last Black Friday sale!”

“Alright, alright I’ll upgrade!” I blush. “Somewhere with a rooftop and, and…oh near work and…”

“Daph, before you become the next property magnate! I need to explain why Brian doesn't own this place anymore.”

“What the fuck!” Lindsay leaps up. “You’ve sold my home! Who to?! When?! Brian, how could you?!”

“It was you who sold it, by foisting it upon him!” George thunders. “Nancy and Ronald decided to be his last line of defence! They knew, somehow you would get Brian to take it, so the sale was immediately declared null and void and the brownstone was placed in trust, which I administer.”

“Uh, George, can I…”

“No, Brian, you cannot. This must be dealt with first. For you.” He hands her a letter. She gnashes her teeth as she reads. When she’s finished, she tosses it on the table, he hands her an iPad. “Now sign and go put on your brave face!” 

GEORGE

Whilst she was silent in her departure, she was most violent in the looks she threw Ted’s way as he followed.

“Oh, what a relief! I’ve just sent our attorneys the NDAs she signed, one for Asteridge - she’s got the one for the twerp to sign, that's why Ted went with her. And the other guarantees her silence going forward unless she wants me to make her homeless.”

“I don’t get it, I’d already bought this place. I was…”

“Yes, I know…” I shake my head fondly. “...every single cent you’ve spent securing this has been reimbursed. Because as much as you would do whatever it was you were thinking of doing, that tiny kernel of guilt would grow and you’d hand it back.”

“He’s right.” Daphne holds his gaze until he nods. “Go on, explain.”

“Explain? You three lied to me?” Brian growls.

“Daphne didn’t know anything about this.” I block his exit. “Please listen to him.”

“I just wanted to protect you.” Justin puts out his hand, we're all relieved when he’s pulled to his side.

“Hey, let him out, I can't understand what he’s saying!” Daph demands.

“I overheard them talking about what they were going to do when they got here, and then she told him about the clause. When he suggested that she get you to take it over; she declared it fitting punishment for you plus a reward for her having had to put up with all of your cavalier bullshit! I was raging and set to confront them; I ended up venting to Kiki, who told George and…”

“...the rest is history. I used her hatred of them, she only looked after Nancy to stay in the will, against her. Upshot of our ruse is that this is now in trust for 50 years before either of them can buy it. Now, as much as you want to thank him, we need to get ready for dinner. Be off you two. Daph, could you stay a second, I’d like your opinion on something.”

DAPH

I am still pinching myself, me a millionaire. 

“Do you think they’ll marry?” He looks wistful.

“Let's hope so.” We lapse into silence. “Anything else before we go eat?”

“Yes, what would you say to joining forces with me in getting Lindsay out of New York and Michael out of Pittsburgh, never to return?”

“Where do I sign?!”