Chapter 20

The next day Brian was back at the office and thankfully got more work done than the previous day. He was able to focus more and personally thought that was due to him finally having done what was best for Gus.

He was still confused about Justin's confession and the kiss and even more so about Justin breaking up with Ethan. Brian had thought about that for a long time the night before and wasn't quite sure if the younger man had really thought all of it through or had maybe made a rush decision. In any case it was none of Brian's business and it didn't really change anything about their current situation. Things were a mess between them and that wouldn't change anytime soon.

They were still disagreeing about Gus, but Brian had been willing to make the sacrifice and agree to Justin's custody deal for the wellbeing of his son. His lawyer had been surprised to say the least when Brian had called him earlier that morning and had informed him of his decision, he had even advised Brian against taking the deal and had advised him to just go ahead with the judge's order and that Gus' statement would help them in the end because Gus would make it clear that he wanted to spend time with his father, but Brian had just told him to take the deal and that was his final decision.

He didn't really care about any possible chance of maybe winning this whole custody trial. The longer it lasted, the more Gus would suffer and the longer they would be forced to only see each other with a social worker present. At least this way they could go back to their old arrangement soon which in the end would be the best for Gus. They had been happy enough for a year now with that arrangement and Brian would just have to make his peace with the knowledge that overnight stays were out of the question. And who knew? Maybe Justin would give in one day. Stranger things had happened.

When his cell rang, Brian frowned when he saw that it was his lawyer's number. He hoped the man wouldn't try again to get him to change his mind. He had made a decision for Gus' sake and he would stick with it now. Whether his lawyer liked it or not.

“Kinney,” Brian answered the call, making it obvious that he wasn't too happy to be talking to the man again.

“Mr Kinney, would you have a minute? There have been some news concerning your custody case.”

“What news?” Brian asked, thereby indicating that he was listening and had time to speak to him.

“I was contacted by Mr Taylor's lawyer after I had informed him that you would accept their offered custody deal.”

Brian sighed, a painful feeling settling in his stomach. “It's not on the table anymore?” He would wring Justin's neck if that was the case. Here he was making sacrifices for Gus' wellbeing and it still wasn't enough for Justin?

“Oh no, it is,” his lawyer immediately informed him. “They have actually offered a new, improved deal in reaction to our agreement to the original deal.”

“An improved deal?” Brian frowned, honestly surprised by that. “What has changed?”

“I have just emailed you a copy of the agreement, but basically Mr Taylor is offering joint custody with equal time to be spent with Gus as per an agreement that is to be worked out between you and him based on working hours and free time.”

“Joint custody?” Brian confirmed, not having expected that.

“Yes, basically, though there is one stipulation that Mr Taylor has insisted on,” his lawyer said slowly, making it obvious that there was more to it than he had said so far.

“What stipulation?” Brian asked, once again feeling that painful feeling in his stomach. He had a feeling that he knew what this was about.

“The overnight stays. He insists that they can only take place at his place with him being present.”

“Excuse me?”

“Apparently he still doesn't feel comfortable letting you spend nights with Gus on your own, but he doesn't want to be in the way of you spending more time with your son, so he has agreed to overnight visits at his place with him present to make sure that Gus will be alright.”

“Are you kidding me?”

“Unfortunately not,” his lawyer sighed, noting that his client wasn't happy with that stipulation. “Other than that, it's a pretty good deal and way better than the previous one.”

Brian thought about what his lawyer had said and knew that the man was right. Joint custody and being allowed to spend equal time with Gus was way better than the previous deal. And even the prospect of overnight visits with Gus was better than it had been before. But at Justin's place? With him present? He couldn't be for fucking real, could he?

“I have also been made aware that Mr Hunt will be moving out of the family home,” the lawyer continued, not sure if Brian had already heard.

“Yeah, I was made aware of that,” Brian answered, before taking a breath. He thought back to the previous night when Gus had called him in tears, telling him that Ethan had moved out.

Gus had been heartbroken and that in return had broken Brian's heart. He had known that Ethan had been an important part of Gus' life in recent years, that he had become a fixture and now that he was moving out, Gus was afraid of losing another person he had been close with, just like he had lost his mothers, had lost Brian for so long and had lost so many friends and other family members.

It had taken Brian some time to get Gus to calm down and once he had, Brian had mentioned what Justin had told him earlier, that Ethan wanted to stay in contact with Gus, wanted to stay in his life.

Gus had been told the same by Justin and had even spoken to Ethan on the phone, who had told him the same himself, but it had only been a small comfort to the sad boy.

Brian knew that it was more important than ever for him to be there for Gus now. With that thought in mind, he forced himself to concentrate back on the issue at hand and to listen to what his lawyer was saying.

“Mr Kinney, I would advise you to read through the agreement. If you are insistent that you want to take their deal, I would advise you to consider this new deal. It is more generous than the previous one, even despite the stipulation.”

“Thanks, I will consider it. I will get back to you once I've made a decision,” Brian said, before he finished the call.

He then went to check his email and indeed found the email from his lawyer. When he opened the attachment and read through it, he realised that it was indeed a much better deal than the one previously offered. More time with Gus, most importantly time on their own without supervision and even more importantly, with them having joint custody, he would be involved in any decisions concerning Gus. Justin would not be the only one able to make decisions for Gus, but would now have to consult with Brian and Brian would now have a right to a say in any matter concerning Gus as well. That actually was a huge concession compared to the previous deal and Brian couldn't help but wonder why Justin had been willing to make that concession, but still hadn't moved on the overnight stays.

Knowing that he wouldn't find any answers in the document, Brian closed it and went back to work. He knew that there was only one way to get the answers he was looking for, but he wasn't sure if he was ready to go down that road.

Hours later, he had made a decision and he was ready for that conversation. He rang Justin's cell, knowing that by now Gus should be in bed. He hoped that Justin would be free to take his call.

“Brian?”

Brian could hear the hesitation in the younger man's voice when he answered the phone. Brian wasn't sure if it came from not wanting to take the call or just because he wasn't sure what this call was about. Or maybe he knew what it was about and wasn't quite sure how it would end. Not wanting to dwell on that for too long, Brian went right in.

“Why?”

“Why what?” Justin sighed, hating when Brian just asked one word questions out of the blue without any context.

“Why the new deal?”

Brian could hear some movement on the other side before Justin answered. “Despite what you might think of me, I want what is best for Gus as well. I never meant for things to end the way they did. This is my way of trying to make things right for him.”

“Why now and not before?”

Justin was silent for the longest time, before he spoke, his voice quiet and hardly above a whisper. “I don't think I was ready before.”

“Bullshit.”

“That's your opinion and you are entitled to it, but... I really think I wasn't. I reacted badly, I know that now, but I felt threatened. I felt threatened by your custody suit and I lashed out. You were right, when you took Gus home: I love him. And I did take a good look at him and I could see how unhappy he was. I don't want him to be unhappy. I never wanted that for him. All I ever did was to try to give him a good life. I never set out to hurt him and you were right, I was.”

“I didn't threaten you or your role in Gus' life,” Brian just replied, knowing that it was the truth.

“But that's what it felt like to me. Here I had spent years trying to make sure that Gus was as happy and well as he could be and then... you show up and... you're in his life again and you go and sue me for custody and to me it felt like you were basically saying I had done a bad job and didn't deserve to be his father any longer. That you would take over because you knew better than me what he needed. I felt threatened in my role in his life and maybe that was childish, but... it is what it felt like to me,” Justin admitted.

“I know you gave him the best life anyone could have wished for,” Brian said quietly, his voice honest and sincere. “I always knew you would love him and take care of him. It's why I didn't hesitate for a second when I had to make that decision...This was never about you, Justin.”

“But that's what it felt like to me, like you were saying: Well, you tried and you did a bad job, now let me take over. I felt like you were criticising me and the decisions I had made.”

“I just wanted to spend more time with my son.”

“By taking away from my time with him,” Justin pointed out and Brian knew that he was right. Him spending more time with Gus would automatically mean that Justin got to spend less time with him. “I love him, Brian. I wasn't ready to give up any time with him.”

“And you are now?”

Justin chuckled humourlessly. “No, I am not,” he admitted. “But I can be honest enough with myself to admit that Gus wants to spend time with you, wants to be with you and as the last few weeks have shown, also needs to spend time with you. And really, after everything... it's not surprising. I just want him to be happy and if being with you makes him happy, then I am willing to make that possible.”

“But you're still against the overnight visits,” Brian pointed out, not able to hide the venom from his voice.

Justin sighed and Brian knew him well enough to know that he was probably rolling his eyes at Brian's tone of voice. “Yes and I will not move on that. Not until you can prove to me that your nightmares won't be a danger to Gus anymore.”

“They never were,” Brian nearly spat, making it clear what he thought of Justin's point of view. “You're overreacting.”

“Then prove me wrong,” Justin just said, his voice now sounding tired. “You are more than welcome to come and spend the weekend here if you like, so you can spend more time with Gus.”

“How convenient...”

“In what way?” Justin frowned, not quite sure he understood what Brian meant.

“You say you love me, you break up with that little boyfriend of yours and now you want me to spend the weekend at your place. Are you sure this is really about Gus and not about you trying to get into my pants?”

“It has nothing to do with you.” The answer had been prompt and sincere. “Yes, I love you and yes, I...,” Justin stopped, not quite sure if he should continue or not, in the end deciding that there was nothing that spoke against telling Brian the truth. “I hope that one day...one day things will be different, but this is about Gus and his wellbeing. I am trying to look out for him and do what is right for him.”

“Because you don't trust me,” Brian angrily shot back.

“I trust you, but I don't trust your subconscious. I know that you would never hurt Gus willingly, but I have been there, Brian. Hell, you know better than anyone because you were right there with me. You know how many fucking bruises I gave you when I had my nightmares and was trying to fight you off. Do you think I meant to hurt you like that? That I wanted to?”

“That was different.”

“No, I don't think it was...,” Justin said flatly. “But until you're ready to see that and do something about it... this is the only deal you will get. Take it or leave it.”

With that Justin hung up and effectively ended their conversation, leaving Brian fuming. How dare he just hang up?

Despite being angry at Justin for just hanging up on him like that, Brian knew that looking at all his options, taking the new deal was by far the best option for Gus. So what if he thought that Justin had ulterior motives? It wasn't like Justin would get anywhere without Brian wanting him to. And right now, Brian still felt way too angry to even consider letting Justin get anywhere. Loving him, my ass! If Justin really loved him, he wouldn't insist on his stupid overnight stay rule.

Two days later their lawyers had worked out all the legal intricacies of the agreement and they had presented it to the judge. Always happy if parents and / or guardians were able to work things out between themselves, the judge agreed to the new terms and Brian and Gus were finally allowed to meet without supervision again.

Justin came by Brian's office and together they tried to work out a temporary schedule between the two of them that would give them both equal time with Gus. As both Brian and Justin were working and had meetings they needed to attend, they tried to make sure that they kept to a certain schedule, making it possible to plan meetings accordingly.

Gus would now (apart from school and meeting friends of course) be spending one day at home with Justin, then the next with Brian. Brian would take him back home to Justin's after dinner, but would be able to spend the rest of the day with his son. As far as weekends were concerned, they went back to the schedule they had pretty much followed for the previous year which had Brian spent any day with Gus that he had a soccer game. Yes, Justin would attend the games and cheer Gus on, but at the end of the day, Brian was really the soccer nerd and he would coach and prepare Gus for his games and together they would talk about certain moments in a game for hours afterwards.

The new schedule wasn't perfect, but it seemed to work for them and Gus and they all settled into a kind of new routine quickly. The only thing they hadn't agreed on yet, was a first overnight stay. So far neither Brian nor Justin had brought up the possibility and as Gus wasn't aware of all the details of the legal custody agreement, neither pointed out to him that overnight stays would be an option. Whenever they would be ready to cross that bridge, they would get it organised, but so far, neither of them seemed ready yet, at least Brian didn't.

As far as their friends were concerned, they were none the wiser. Yes, they knew that Justin and Ethan had broken up and Brian was pretty sure that at least Daphne knew the real reason why, they also knew that Brian and Justin had reached a custody agreement, but neither he nor Justin had disclosed the details of that agreement to anyone. No one needed to know and thankfully, Justin had respected his privacy enough not to tell anyone about that episode with the nightmare.

Yes, their friends had known about the tension between them and the custody trial, but apart from themselves and Ethan, they hadn't really gone into detail what they were disagreeing about and hadn't really shared that information with anyone. It was between them and for them to figure out and as far as their friends were concerned, they had now figured it out, much to everyone's relief.

And the most relieved of all had been Gus. The boy had flourished now that he had been allowed to see his father again unsupervised and had been reassured that Ethan would only be a phone call away and would still see him whenever Gus wanted to. He had clearly been a lot happier than in recent months. He had also stopped being an ass to Justin and had started to forgive him for – at least in his mind - being the reason that had kept him and his father apart. They had worked things out and had improved their relationship, not the least because Brian had pointed out to Gus that Justin had only wanted the best for him and had tried to love him in the best way he had known.

Things were definitely looking up for everyone in the weeks after the new custody agreement had been reached.