CHAPTER 8 - BALLOONS AND A BLAST FROM THEIR PAST

LOFT - LATE AFTERNOON, NEXT DAY

BEN

I’m so nervous, but both Emmett and Brian have just said to tell him everything, no matter how much it still hurts, this way he can understand when I wobble! I’m staring out of the window when something catches my eye. It's a very large bunch of balloons. I lose sight of them as they pass under the awning, at the same time the timer on the oven goes.

“That is perfect.” I declare, having checked the crust for gaps. Chuckling because I can kick the oven door shut without Brian or Ems shrieking over my thuggish treatment of their appliances, I reach for the wine. As I open and pour, I remember that he doesn't drink! 

“Well that's not impressive at all. You’re supposed to remember things like that. What’s he gonna think?” 

“What about?” He asks from behind the balloons! “Either take them or give me directions!” He orders, chuckling. 

“Come forward two steps, now two to your left, three more forward.” I part them to find his grinning cute face. “First we kiss, then you explain.” He leans forward, his soft strawberry scented lips brush against mine, I sigh, he lets go of them. 

Ten minutes later, yes ten minutes! His cheek is against my chest and I’m licking my lips. “I forgot you don’t drink, so need to go to the store to get some no alcohol beer or wine. We also need to get some more balm, that’s delicious.” 

“Botanicals.” He states, lifting his head. “I brought some with me, and I always carry a spare balm. Want it?”

“Please. So the balloons?” We chuckle as they bob around the room. 

“Figured you could use a distraction whilst telling me about your miscreant mistake. Basket’s in the hall, you grab them.”

“Yes sir, and well figured.” I smile. His kindness settles my nerves a bit. “What is in there then?”

“My side of dinner. Shall I do my romantic history whilst you marshall your thoughts?”

“Please.”

“His name was Blake. I was such a fool, I got blinded by the wrong thing. Sorry, I’m not making sense.” He starts to blush but also looks teary. I take his hand. “Blake was with me from the start, even before the book, he proofread some of it. Once it was published and I got my money, he was a little disappointed that I didn’t get more recognition, but I wasn’t. I didn't like the glitz and the glamour side of things. He was always pushing me to speak to Michael and Lindsay about what he saw as the sidelining of me, but I didn’t. In fact, I defended them against him. Like I said, I was a fool.”

“What did Michael do?” I grit out.

“It was Lindsay. She said that she saw Blake with someone else in a club. I confronted him with it and he denied it, of course, and for a while I believed him, but then came the evidence that was irrefutable and the one thing I would not forgive him for.”

“He cheated on you?” I sigh. “Before you answer that, let’s sit down.” He perches at the far end of the sofa, moving closer when I pat the cushion. “Who was it that he did the dirty on you with? Not Michael surely?”

“No, God no, he disliked Michael from the start, kept on calling him Twinkie, hates him now of course. No, drugs. He used to be on crystal and I got him clean. Swore them off, he said. We were arguing more and more and he was going out, not telling me what he was doing or with whom. I confided my fears to my good friends, who said they thought the same. After all he cheated on you, they said, what else has he done, they said. About two weeks later, they had proof of what he’d done.”  He sighs heavily, I pull him closer. “I showed him the picture, and whilst he didn’t deny it was him, he said he wasn’t doing drugs, he was just there.”

“What?”

“Hmm. I was so skeptical that I kicked him out, only to find out three months later that he had joined a counselling service and was trying to reach out to those in the crack houses and stuff. They trusted him because of who he was.”

“Oh fuck.”

“An understatement.” He sighs. I wipe away the tears. “These are from shame. I should’ve believed him over them, but didn’t. Not seen him since.”

“Well at least your failure wasn’t doing what he was. Mine was called Charlie, who waited until we got married to decide he wanted to run after any ass that he could. I didn’t notice until he tried it on with the two people I thought he never would.” He looks astonished. “I couldn’t believe it either. First, was Emmett, but he played that off as being drunk. Then within an hour he tried Brian, and after he busted him in the gut, Brian told me, followed by Emmett. He was out that night. Never been with anyone since, until you.”

“Jesus. Why did he think they wouldn’t say anything? So as not to hurt you?”

“I guess, never asked. Like I said, out that night.”

We sit in silence for a few minutes before he clears his throat. “For Pheebs, the balloons are for her from her human Mr Teddy, love that she named me after her bear.”

“Oh.” I can’t help the pinch of disappointment. “She’ll be thrilled.”

“This is for you.” I look in his hand and gasp. “I know, isn't it pretty? They said it’s a crystal yoni egg, saw it on a stall up the road. They’re so good for, um actually, I don’t know what they’re good for, but I thought it matched your eyes, and - what’s that look for?”

“I know its purpose, which is to strengthen your pelvic floor.”

He stares at it for a few seconds. “How does it get up there? Isn’t it a little - oh my God, it’s for women?!”

“Yeah!” I hoot harder when he does the yuck-yuck hands and drops it on the sofa in horror.

“I’ll take it back! I’m so sorry!”

“You won’t!” I declare, putting it in my pocket. “I will look at it every time and smile.”

“First, the cum towel, and now women’s sex toys. I promise you, I’m not inept in bed!”

“I look forward to finding that out!” 

“Nor am I a braggart! Can we please start this conversation again from the balloons?!”

“Nope. However, wanna show me your botanicals?” 

TED

I’m relieved that I can stick my face in the freezer whilst I get the ice. I can’t believe I didn’t realise what that was! 

“Come out before you get frostbite!” Ben chuckles from nearer than where I left him.

“Iced strawberry balm.” I jibe back, his lips warm up mine and all embarrassment is forgotten for a while. The slurp as we part makes us giggle, then I look down. “Is that your egg or is the kiss working for you?”

“Definitely working.” He grins. “Let’s do more.” He declares, turning off the oven. We kiss back to the sofa, I stop us from sitting and glance at the bedroom, he looks hopeful and bashful. “This wasn’t the more I meant.”

“But it's the more I want. Fancy a shower first?” I bat my eyes then moan in delight when he tosses me over his shoulder and heads to the bathroom

LEON’S OFFICE - TWO HOURS LATER

LEON

The two tap rap on the door office always makes me smile. He looks keen as he comes in. “Sit down, Teddy, I’ll be there in a bit.” I order, going back to checking my screen. “Finally!” I grumble as the email comes through, as I’ve been waiting for the last three days for this report. I sit back and read about the new people in his life and feel relief, although it’s bittersweet as I’m no longer part of that. “Good, very good, this Benjamin Bruckner sounds very good, very good indeed.” I look at my phone and send Michael to voicemail. He’s called twice and Lindsay three times. They can spit roast for a while.

Teddy nudges my elbow, so I shut down my desk and scoop him up. He sighs happily into my neck. As I shut the door behind us, I kiss his nose. “Yes, sweetie, it’s time to go home, and for me to be Blake again. I’ve waited for years to get my revenge on them. They ruined our lives, soon it will be time for me to ruin theirs. Hopefully, your namesake will understand and this time forgive me.”