Justin looked at Brian uncertainly as the dorm room door closed behind them, and Brian locked it for the night. "Is something wrong, Brian? I didn't get the feeling you wanted to come back here so soon."

Brian shrugged. "I need to talk to you, and I figured we would have the solitude here."

"Okay..." Justin answered hesitantly. Clearly, something was wrong. The tension in the ride back had been palpable. They hadn't spoken a word. Justin had thought to reach out to Brian during the drive... but the angry lines on Brian's face had stopped him quickly. Something was very wrong, and apparently, he was about to find out what. He sat down on his bed, his eyes looking at Brian expectantly. "Well, let's hear it, then. Maybe you'll feel better once you talk about it."

"I doubt that," Brian mumbled. "We'll probably both be more miserable."

"Is it about the phone call? Was it Brandon?" Justin asked, going for what he thought to be the obvious conclusion.

Brian snorted. "Isn't it always?"

"Okay, have a seat and tell me what he's done this time." Justin inhaled and exhaled deeply. He had the feeling this wasn't going to be good.

He sat next to Justin on the bed, slowly wringing his hands in front of him. This was difficult in so many ways. He was devastated, angry, and bursting with the need for revenge. His eyes looked in Justin's direction. Right now he couldn't think of one good reason why he shouldn't have what he wanted. Loyalty to his brother was a joke now. Everything about Brandon filled him with contempt. There was no longer anything left to protect. "I don't know where to start."

"Umm, how about with the phone call. What was that about?"

Brian laughed coldly, his heart and gut twisting into impenetrable knots. "The phone call. Yeah, that's a good place to start. Well, that's simple to answer. He called to warn me that he'd just outed me to Chris Hobbs."

"Outed you?" Justin gasped. He couldn't believe it. Why would Brandon do that? He knew what Brian's football career meant to him. It just didn't make sense.

"Apparently he went into a jealous rage when I drove off with you. I don't give a fuck why he did it. If Chris had busted me at Babylon, my career would have been over!" Brian's eyes were wild in anger as he spoke the words. He had been reasonably calm when the thoughts had merely been running through his head; however, once speaking of Brandon's betrayal, it all seemed much more diabolical.

"Fuck... I'm sorry, Brian. That's majorly fucked up. I can't believe he'd do that to you!" Justin shook his head in disbelief. "It's like he loses his mind sometimes. I know he loves you. I've seen it." He bit at his lip uncertainly, wishing there was a kinder way to ask, yet unable to find one. "Could it be a condition of his illness? That's the only thing that makes sense."

Brian sneered. "Illness! There is no fucking illness. That's another lie. One that I told him to tell you - over and over again. He's just a jealous, manipulative freak! I'm done with him and all the drama that surrounds him. As far as I'm concerned - he's dead to me. I told him that tonight!"

"What do you mean there's no illness? You mean the both of you have been lying to me from day one?" Justin stood to his feet, tears sliding freely from his eyes. He had been betrayed by both brothers? This was even more fucked up than he'd ever imagined.

"Calm you little blond head down!" Brian snapped. "It's not like that. Brandon was sick. He told me he was in remission - maybe a couple of weeks ago. At the time, you and I were barely on speaking terms. I told him to tell you on numerous occasions. It wasn't my story to tell."

"Well, it appears that you decided it is now!" Justin countered. He began pacing back and forth; he couldn't believe what Brian was hitting him with now. "Is there anything else you've failed to tell me? You might as well get it all out now if there is..."

Brian glared at the feisty blond, his eyes sweeping fervently over him. Despite his anger, and the coldness of how he had displayed his intentions to Brandon, one thing was blatantly obvious - he wanted to fuck him badly. In light of all that had happened, he couldn't see one reason why he shouldn't. However, it wouldn't be like he had boasted to Brandon. If it happened - it would be honest, something his brother knew nothing about. It would be what Justin wanted. If not, then it wouldn't happen. "I told him I was going to take what I wanted. My loyalty to him had become a joke."

"Go on..." Justin told him, without a doubt in his mind where this part of their discussion was heading.

"I told him that I was going to tell you everything - which I have done; then I was going to fuck the shit out of you." Brian looked Justin straight in his beautiful blue eyes; he forced himself not to flinch at the pain he saw reflected in them. "You can call me an ass, a dick - what-the-fuck ever you want, but I am being honest with you. That's something he has never done! What happens now is in your hands."

Justin laughed sardonically. "Well, that's blunt. I actually respect that. Okay, I have a question for you."

"There's a surprise..." Brian muttered derisively.

"Cute," Justin groused. "It's simple really. If we had sex, either tonight or some other, what happens the morning after?"

Brian looked away from the hot blond, at once uncertain of what to say... for one reason alone. He didn't know the answer. "Justin, I can't answer that. My brother just ripped both of our lives apart tonight; I don't fucking know anything beyond that!"

Justin nodded, but it wasn't in agreement with Brian's words... it was more of an acceptance of what they couldn't - wouldn't ever be. There came a time for dreams to end. This was the time to lay this one forever to rest. "Yeah, just as I thought. I- I can't do this anymore, Brian. I'm going to see about changing it first thing tomorrow."

"What are you talking about? Change what?" Brian curtly demanded.

"I'm calling my parents in the morning. I want out of here. This university hasn't ever been for me; I knew it when I came here, but my Dad wanted it for me." Justin looked Brian directly in the eye, in a last-ditch effort to give him some hope... a reason to think he could be the man to make the elusive Brian Kinney commit. He saw nothing but emptiness and denial. It was time to end it. "If my parents don't agree to a simple art school, I'll stay... but I will only do so if they move me into another dorm."

Pain immediately pierced his heart, Brian looked away, his throat was rough when he rasped, "Do you really hate me that much?"

A bittersweet smile crossed Justin's lips. "Hate you? No, never. You're my friend. Actually, so much more than that. Doing this gives me a chance to preserve this friendship. I just can't let you break my heart." Justin walked away without a backward glance, slipping into the bathroom, and locking the door without giving Brian a chance for any form of rebuttal.

Brian stared at the closed door, hating the tears that now shimmered in his eyes. He hated his inability to express himself to another man, more than that, he hated the fact that he had just lost Justin. He wouldn't attempt to stop him. Until he got his shit together, he knew it wasn't fair to the sensitive blond. He only hoped that by the time he did get both himself and his life in perspective, Justin would want to hear from him. After seeing the devastation in Justin's beautiful blue eyes, he wasn't so sure he would be so fortunate.

Behind the closed door, Justin flinched when he heard the outer door slamming shut. There wasn't a doubt in his mind where his roommate was now heading. Pain management in the style of Brian Kinney led to only one place. As silent sobs ripped through him, Justin accepted it was already too late.

His heart had already been broken. Now came the arduous task of mending it.

TBC