Beta by Jilla-  All medical mistakes are mine.  Banner by Marny1.  In my universe, Mel and Linds did not go to Canada.  Written for the H/C challenge on QAF challenges

"Hello boys. Having a good evening?" Brian asked as he wrapped his arm around Michael's neck and nodded to Ted and Emmett.

"You're tweaked, Brian. What have you taken?" Michael asked as he looked into Brian's bloodshot eyes.

"A little E, some special K and a few drinks," Brian slightly slurred his words as his body swayed to the music. "Bartender, I need another drink. Give me a shot of Beam," Brian turned to the bartender, setting his glass on the bar as he pushed it to the man.

The bartender filled Brian's glass and he drank it down in one swallow.

"Another," Brian demanded.

The bartender filled Brian's glass a second time and Brian drank it quickly.

"I see someone I must do," Brian said as he eyed a muscular brunette on the dance floor. He turned and sauntered onto the floor, stopping in front of the tall brunette. His body danced to the music as he ran his hands up and down the man's torso and whispered in his ear. "Wanna go to the back room?"

The brunette nodded yes, and the two men walked to the back room. The trick unbuttoned his fly, pulling Brian's cock out. Going down in one motion, the trick swallowed his cock, almost down to the root. Brian closed his eyes, enjoying the sensation of warm, moist, suction on his most sensitive body part. The trick fondled his balls and Brian threaded his fingers through his hair, encouraging him in his task. There was no need to hold back his release, and he quickly came into the trick's mouth. Brian turned the trick around, pulling his pants down in one swift motion. Donning a condom, he pushed into the trick with no preparation. The trick groaned at the assault, but Brian was oblivious. Grabbing the trick's cock, he pumped it as he thrust into the tight hole. The dual stimulation brought the man to completion quickly and Brian filled his condom shortly after. He was in and out in less than ten minutes.

He returned to the bar for another drink and rejoined his friends.

"That was fast. Was he that bad?" Emmett asked.

"In and out with a maximum of pleasure and minimum of bullshit. That's always been my motto," Brian responded as he took a tablet of E out of his pocket and placed it on his tongue. He took out another packet and offered it to his companions.

"No, thanks," Michael shook his head. "I better go home to Ben. He worries if I'm out too late."

Brian rolled his eyes, but didn't say anything.

"I've got an early morning workout with my trainer," Ted said.

"I didn't know you had a trainer, Theodore?" Brian remarked as he patted Ted on his back.

"Oh, Teddy. That is so wonderful!" Emmett gushed as he clapped his hands together by his mouth. "You're so hot since you had your little nip and tuck last fall, but now you might rival Brian," Emmett teased. "I have an early meeting with a couple planning their fiftieth wedding anniversary. Can you imagine being married so long?"

"Well boys. I guess I will have to entertain queer Pittsburgh on my own." Brian lifted up his glass in a cheers gesture and watched his friends leave.

He ordered two shots of Beam, drinking them in quick succession. He bought himself some Special K and snorted it as well.

"Order me a cab," Brian told the bartender as he looked over the dance floor one last time.

Brian gave the cab driver a $20 bill, significantly over the cost of the fare. He fumbled in his pocket for the key to the building and tried for five minutes to put it in the key hole. The door opened and he stumbled into the building. After waiting for the elevator, he pushed the button for the loft. It took three attempts to punch in the correct code before the door would slide open. He entered the loft, went to his liquor cart, and poured himself another Beam. He felt a burn in his chest as the liquid went down. Looking at the window, he saw the snow falling and then felt his body jerk. He collapsed on the floor of the loft.


Justin painted a red streak across the canvas. He was proud of the large canvas, as it was the signature piece in his upcoming show. Picking up a smaller brush, he filled in an area of deep blue over the left corner of the canvas. The ringing phone jarred him from his muse's hold.

"Hello"

"Yes. This is Justin Taylor."

"When was he brought in?"

"How is he?"

"I see. I'll be there as soon as I can. Thank you."

Justin hung up the phone as the sweat poured out of his body. He couldn't think straight as thoughts raced through his mind. What if Brian died? Had the family been told? How would Gus react? How about Mel and Linds? Mikey would be freaking out. What should he do?

His mind shut down, refusing to think about the phone call. As his body switched to automatic, he cleaned his brushes and straightened his studio. He went to his apartment where he packed a bag and called Liberty Air for the first flight out.
_______________________________________________________________________

"You look pale. Can I get you anything?" the flight attendant asked as he touched Justin on the arm.

"Can I get you a drink? Sir" the tall, lanky blonde male asked as he leaned closer to Justin. "The air gets very dry in these airplanes."

"No," Justin replied.

"You look tired. Can I get you a pillow or blanket?"

"No, I'm fine," Justin snapped. "Please leave me alone."

"Okay. But if you need anything, just push this button." The flight attendant leaned over and pointed to the call button.

Justin stared out the window for the remainder of the flight. The flight attendant did not talk to him again.

"Thank you for flying Liberty Air. It is a chilly 25 degrees in Pittsburgh. I hope your stay in Pittsburgh is pleasant and you will join us again soon," the captain said over the intercom.

"Chilly Pittsburgh," Justin mumbled. After his last visit he remembered thinking it would be a cold day in hell before he returned to this city, and now he understood the definition of the phrase. Surely he was entering hell and the cold would freeze his very soul.

Pulling his coat around him, he hailed a taxi, directing the driver to Allegheny General.
Making his way to the ICU, he stopped at the nursing station.

"I'm Justin Taylor. A Dr. Houston called me about Brian Kinney."

"He's in the corner room," the nurse pointed to a doorway caddy corner to the nurse's station. "You can go in, but only for a few minutes. I'll let the doctor know you've arrived."

Justin pulled his coat even tighter around him, trying to ward off the chill in his body. He felt the sweat pool under his arms and trickle down his back, and thought how odd it was to be hot and cold at the same time.

He stared at the door, trying to get his feet to move toward the beeps and whirs coming out of the room

"It's the third one down," the nurse repeated.

"I know."

He took a deep breath and willed his legs to walk into the room.

He gasped at the sight in front of him. Brian was hooked up to what seemed like dozens of machines, and there were wires and tubes coming from every body part. In shock, Justin walked out.

As he turned toward the nurse's station, a man in his late forties wearing a white hospital coat asked, "Are you Mr. Taylor?"

"Yes. Dr. Houston?" Justin answered as he read the name tag on the coat.

"Why don't you follow me to the lounge and we can talk?"

Justin picked up his bag and followed the doctor to the lounge. They sat down on two well worn beige chairs in the farthest corner from the television.

"Mr. Taylor, Mr. Kinney listed you as his emergency contact. Do you have Power of Attorney or Health Care Proxy?

Justin swallowed. "I'm not sure. I used to have them, but we...um... We were together, but aren't anymore," Justin explained.

"Please find out?"

"Doctor, right now I'm here and I want to know about Brian. Can you tell me what happened?"

"Since you're listed as emergency contact, I will update you. But please find out if there is someone else who needs to make medical decisions for Mr. Kinney."

Justin nodded. "I will."

"Mr. Kinney was brought in at 9:00 this morning. He was unconscious, but did respond to pain. His tox screen showed low levels of Ketamine and Ecstasy. His leg was crushed by his weight and by staying in the same position for a long time....From the report of the paramedics, he appeared to have been unconscious for a long time. He is now in a coma."

Justin listened but had difficulty following all the medical jargon. "A coma! He's in a coma. Did he arrive that way? Who found him? Did anyone accompany him to the hospital?" Justin fired off the questions faster than the doctor could answer.

"Yes, he's been in a coma since his arrival by ambulance."

"Do you know who found him?" Justin asked, wondering why no one else was at the hospital.

"According to the ambulance crew, his cleaning lady found him. He was lying on the floor and she couldn't awaken him."

"Do you know why he was in a coma?"

"It is appears that he overdosed on alcohol and drugs. We would have pumped his stomach, but the toxins appeared to have already gone through his system. Unfortunately, the damage was done and it appears that his kidneys are functioning at only 25% capacity. We may have to put him on dialysis."

"Jesus! Will he wake up?"

"We don't know. Only time will tell. Now if you'll excuse me, Mr. Taylor I have other patients to see. I'll check on Mr. Kinney later today. If his condition changes, the staff will notify me."

"Thank you."

Justin sat in the waiting area. I'm here for a reason, he thought, and I should go down and sit with Brian.

He thought about calling the family but wanted to wait. He hadn't talked to them since early summer time, and that had been very awkward. He needed to find out if he was still listed as Brian's Power of Attorney and Medical Proxy, but that could wait until a little later. The doctor didn't seem too worried that Brian would die anytime soon. The bigger fear was that he wouldn't ever wake up.

Flashback

"I want it done by tomorrow, Theodore. Yes, tomorrow or you will be dead," Brian said as he snapped shut his cell phone.

"Why do you treat Ted the way you do?"

"What do you mean?"

Justin grabbed the beer bottle on the island, twirling it in his hand. "He works for you and you obviously trust him, yet you constantly threaten him."


Brian continued staring at his computer as he clicked at various links on the web page in front of him. "It's complicated. You weren't around back then."

"And..," Justin said trying to walk the fine line between getting Brian to talk and Brian clamming up.

"A long time ago in a Galaxy far, far away..."

Justin glared at Brian despite Brian's face looking at the computer screen. "I'm not Mikey living in his comic book fantasy world," he snapped.

Brian continued to look at the computer screen. "Ted took an accidental overdose and landed in the hospital in a coma. He made me his Medical Proxy and I had to decide when or if to pull the plug."

"Wow. Why'd he choose you if you weren't that close?"

Brian swiveled his chair, looking at Justin. "He knew I was cold hearted enough not to let him suffer. He knew that I would know when to pull the plug."

Justin walked out of the kitchen area toward Brian, wrapping his arms around the older man. "You're not cold hearted, Brian. You're the most generous man I know," Justin said as he kissed Brian.

Brian returned the kiss, but pulled back after a few moments. "After that I told Michael he was my Proxy, but then you came along and now it's you."

"What? You never told me."

"I'm telling you now."

"But... Why not Michael? He's your best friend and he's known you since you were 14."

"Exactly. Mikey would never be able to pull the plug. He couldn't let go. I'm depending on you to know when to pull the plug."

Justin sat on Brian's lap, touching his forehead to Brian's. "Okay."

End Flashback
_________________________________________________________________

The short conversation came back to Justin as he walked towards Brian's room, but the nurse stopped him before he could enter. "I'm sorry, but you'll have to wait until 2:00 to see Mr. Kinney again. In ICU, he can only have visitors the first fifteen minutes of every hour."

"Oh, okay," Justin nodded as he glanced at his watch. Seeing he had thirty minutes to wait, he went to the cafeteria for some food.

He went through the line, picking out a hamburger, fries and a soda. He paid for his purchases and sat down to eat. Justin's stomach rumbled as he smelled the food. He attempted to eat, but when he took a bite of the burger, it tasted like saw dust and the fries were cold. After dumping the food in the garbage can, he settled for a drink from the water fountain. Justin glanced at a display of fruit as he was leaving and he saw a green apple. He remembered Brian peeling an apple with his pocket knife while lying in bed, as he sketched him. Someone's beeper went off and he was brought back to reality. Justin left the cafeteria and returned to the ICU.

As soon as the clock read 2:00, he made his way down to Brian's room. This time, he sat down in the chair by the bed and watched Brian breathe. Even now, lying in a coma, the man had a twisted hold on him.

He'd read a lot of medical articles after his own injury and remembered reading that even when people are in a coma, they still hear subconsciously.

"So Brian, it's me Justin. The trick that wouldn't go away. You know, it's your own fault this time. You still had me listed as your emergency contact so they called me. I flew down on Liberty Air and the Flight Attendant tried for at least half an hour to pick me up." He frowned as he relayed the story. "I was sort of preoccupied, so I ignored the guy. Maybe when all this is over, I might get lucky and see if he is on my flight back to New York."

"New York. What a place to be." Justin stood up and walked around the small room as he spoke. "I've got a show coming up with another new artist. I'm beginning to make a name for myself." Justin found his backpack and fished around in it until he found a book of photographs of his paintings. "I've been photographing all my work so I can take it to galleries. I have the pictures here in my portfolio. I think you'd be proud of the pieces. You probably aren't going to be well enough to make it to my show, so you'll have to settle for these." He placed the portfolio back in his bag. "I guess Lindsay was right; I needed to go to New York. I was painting this huge piece when I got the phone call from Dr. Houston about your unscheduled stay in their establishment. I wouldn't have thought this was your idea of a great vacation spot, but I guess I don't know you very well. At least that was the impression I got when I was here last summer." Justin frowned deeply as he remembered Brian's statement from last summer. The words still stung.

Flashback
"Justin," Brian yelled as Justin closed the elevator gate. "I don't want you here and don't leave any more messages for me. I know where to find you if I change my mind."

End Flashback

"It doesn't matter anymore. You kept me as you Power of Attorney and Medical Proxy. According to the Brian Kinney operating manual, actions have always been your strong suit," Justin said as he looked at Brian lying in the bed.

"I haven't called the family yet. I don't know if I'm up to dealing with them. I'm sure Mikey will tell me where to go, and well, you know how everyone else will act. Debbie will squeeze me to death and rant about my not keeping in touch." Justin returned to his seat and picked up Brian's hand. It was warm, not cold like he thought it would be. Justin gently ran his fingers up and down Brian's arm, hoping Brian could somehow feel his love through the caress. So often they didn't speak words, but their bodies spoke volumes. "Emmett will tell me how much he misses his "baby". Ted will not say much of anything, but that's Ted, the unemotional accountant. Of course, that doesn't even take into consideration my mom or Daphne, but since you really aren't part of their world unless you're with me, I don't have to tell them. On the other hand, if I stay here long enough, I should go see them."

"I think I'm still your Medical Proxy, but I'll need to call Mel and be sure. Of course, calling Mel will result in telling her why I need to know. Then she'll tell Linds, even if I tell her not to." Justin rolled his eyes, knowing Brian would understand the gesture. "They both listen so well. Of course, Linds will rush right over and fawn over you like the good little wife she is. Yeah, we both know she's married to Mel, but in her heart she'll always have a special love for you."

"Jeez, Brian. Your life is really a soap opera. I forgot about Cynthia. I should really call her since you're her boss." He picked up his phone, scrolling through the entries to see if she was listed. He stopped midway through and hit his hand against his forehead. "I'm an idiot. I have your number at Kinnetik. I don't need to call her desk directly." He placed his phone back on his belt clip. "Since you didn't show up to work today, and probably won't for a while, she'd appreciate knowing where you are."

"I wonder if my mom talked to me like this when I was in a coma." Justin touched his hand to the scar on his forehead, rubbing the area lightly. "I know you didn't talk to me since you didn't come see me. Still makes me mad that you didn't come see me." Justin lightly touched his balled fist to Brian's upper arm, giving it a slight push. "You wouldn't have known what to say. I can just see you sitting here telling me about the hot trick you picked up in Babylon and took to the back room. The nurses would have gotten quite an earful if you'd been heard relaying your exploits."

"You know, all these wires and tubes and noises are really scary. What if you don't wake up? What if you get worse and I have to decide to make a medical decision? I hate you right now. More than I ever hated you in the past. I don't want this responsibility. You have to wake up just so I can yell at you and tell you what as ass you really are. What were you thinking? Are you in that much pain?" Justin squeezed Brian's hand, even though he knew Brian would think the gesture lesbianic.

The nurse came in to check on Brian and said, "I'm sorry, but you'll have to come back at 3:30."

"3:30? I thought I could see him every hour?"

"Shift change," she said as she checked the different tubes and wires.

"Any change?" Justin asked.

"No, he's the same."

"Is that good? I mean, that he's the same."

"You'll have to talk to the doctor. He should be in within an hour."

Justin left Brian's room and returned to the waiting area. He picked up a Reader's Digest, and then put it back on the table. He found the remote for the television and flipped channels for a while, but in the end, left it on some soap opera. He sat down and then stood right back up. Finally it was time for him to go to Brian's room.

Each time it was a little easier to walk in. He'd gotten over the initial shock of seeing Brian's still body with all the tubes and machines hooked to it. He pulled up a chair and began talking again. "And then the other guy said...." Justin stopped his story when the doctor entered.

The doctor picked up Brian's chart, making a few notes in it.

"How is he, doctor?"

"There's been no change."

"Is that good?"

"Well I was hoping for some return of his kidney function. If it doesn't improve by tomorrow, we'll have to start dialysis. While he can function on 25%, it is not ideal. Your friend took a lot of drugs and his system is still trying to process them. He's lucky to be alive."

"Thank you."

"Why don't you go home and get some rest. Leave your information with the nurse and she'll call you if there's any change."

Justin nodded at the doctor as he left the room.

"Home. The doctor thinks I should go home. Where is that, Brian?" Justin stood and paced the small area like a caged animal. "Should I go to the loft? Should I call my mom and ask if I can stay there? I know. I could call Debbie and ask to stay in my old room," he said sarcastically. "Debbie would rant and rave and say how you deserved to be in a coma, etc, etc... Then she'd squeeze the breath out of me, start crying and fix a huge pan of Puttenesca. No, I don't think I'll call her. Now if I was Brian Kinney, I could whip out my Platinum credit card and stay at the nicest suite in town." Justin took out his wallet and made a grand gesture of looking for a credit card. "But, I'm not Brian Kinney and I don't have a Platinum credit card, and I don't know where to go," Justin ranted at Brian as he felt the tears fall down his cheeks. "I don't know where to go."

Justin let the tears fall. But no one was there to dry them, or tell him he was a silly little faggot for crying over his lover.

The nurse came in again, checking Brian's vitals. "Mr. Taylor, visiting hours are over; you'll have to leave and come back tomorrow. If you want to leave your phone number at the desk, we'll call you if there is any change in his condition."

Justin looked up at the nurse, "I'm sorry, what did you say? I wasn't paying attention."

"I said visiting hours are over. Please leave your information at the desk and we'll call you if there is a change in Mr. Kinney's condition."

"Okay. I just want to say goodbye."

Justin picked up his bag, leaned over Brian's face; touched his forehead to Brian's and said, "Later." He walked out of the room and went to the lobby.