"You'll have to leave, Mr. Taylor," the blonde nurse said as she walked Justin out of the room.

Justin watched Brian's room from the waiting area. He paced, looked out the window, ran his hands over his face, tried to sit down, and then started the whole sequence again. After what seemed like an hour but in reality was only twenty minutes, the nurse came out to talk to him.

"What happened?"

"His blood pressure fell too low. We gave him some medication and he appears to have stabilized for now, but we will continue to monitor him. You can see him in another hour."

‘Okay," Justin said as he sat down with a thud in the nearest chair. He closed his eyes as he thought about his last thirty six hours. My day started out normal, painting, getting ready for an upcoming showcase of my work, and then my world turned upside down with a short two minute phone call. Brian was in a coma, and now I'm back in Pittsburgh with him. I'm making medical decisions for a man whom I don't even know wants me around. I'm estranged from a family that would want to know that Brian is ill, yet I can't bring myself to tell them. How am I going to fix this? Brian always fixed everything, and now it's my turn. I'm not sure I can.

He looked at the clock on the wall. It was almost 4:00. He didn't think he could do this for another five hours. He needed to move; he couldn't sit any longer. He walked to the end of the corridor and was about to walk down another hallway, when he heard his name.

"Justin."

He turned around, and there was Lindsay and Melanie. He walked over to them and gave them both a hug.

"What happened?" Lindsay asked.

"He overdosed, and is now in a coma. They had to put him on dialysis, too," Justin said as he walked back to the waiting area.

They followed him, sitting down opposite him in the well-worn chairs.

"Have you seen him?" Lindsay asked as she curled her hair around her ear.

"They only let me in once every forty five minutes, and then I only get to stay for fifteen minutes. He can have visitors in about ten minutes. I think they'll let two people go in at once."

"Can I see him?"

"Of course. Why don't you both go in?" Justin said, knowing that it was the right thing to do.

"Thank you."

They sat and watched the clock until it was visiting time. Melanie and Lindsay went into the room. Lindsay gasped when she saw all the machines Brian was hooked up to. Tears ran down her face and she sobbed into Mel's chest.

"Oh Brian, what have you done?" She wailed. She could only stay for a few minutes and quickly retreated out to the waiting room.

Mel continued to comfort Linds. "Justin, why don't you spend the remaining time with him?"

Justin nodded and walked into Brian's room. He was far enough removed from the waiting room that Mel and Linds couldn't hear him.

"Okay. Do I get points for calling it right? Lindsay and Mel just showed up. Lindz asked to see you and remembering my country club manners, I agreed. She stayed all of two minutes, broke down in tears and now is being comforted by Mel. Now I'm not saying I didn't cry too. Of course, I did. But now, I don't cry every time I walk in. The machines are noisy and you just lay there which is so unnatural. It's creepy, Brian. I keep expecting that you will look at me and start yelling each time I walk in the room. But then I see you hooked up to all the machines, wires and tubes coming out of too many places in your body, and wonder if I'll ever hear you yell at me again."

He walked around the room, trying to alleviate the tension in his body. "I wonder how long it will take for everyone else to arrive? At least Melanie and Lindsay aren't going to scream at me and tell me it's my fault. One good thing about Mel hating your guts is that she will never defend you, and she will always be on my side when it comes to you. I can do no wrong and every problem we ever had is your fault."

Justin pulled the chair over to the bed. He gently lifted Brian's hand, placing it in his own and giving it a small squeeze. "You know, you need to stop making those alarm bells go off. You scared the shit out of me when you did that. They tell me that your blood pressure fell too low and they had to give you drugs to bring it back up. Stop it! Get your blood clean and those kidneys working and wake up. I want to yell at you when you're awake."

"My time's up. Love you," he said as he ended his visit by touching their foreheads together and whispering "later".

Justin returned to the waiting area and he found Lindsay had quit crying.

"Where are you staying, Justin? You know you can stay with us. Gus would love to see you," Lindsay said as she grabbed his hand and gave it a little squeeze.

"Thanks, but I'm staying with Daphne. I don't know that staying with you guys is a good idea. Gus always expects Brian and me to be together, and he'd start asking questions."

"You're right. Do you need anything?" Lindsay asked, dabbing her eyes again.

"No. I just need Brian to wake up."

"We had better go pick Gus up from day care. We'll come back tomorrow. Get some rest, Justin. You look exhausted," Lindsay said as she gave a small smile.

"Thanks, I'll let you know if anything changes," Justin said.

Justin watched the women walk out of the ICU wing, and a pang of jealousy hit him. They were going home to their family and would most likely be spending the night playing with Gus, instead of sitting in this shitty waiting room, waiting for Brian to wake up.

He had another forty five minutes until he'd be allowed to see Brian again, so he went down to the lobby to call Daphne. It was too cold to go outside, so he sat in the row of chairs in the lobby.

"Hey," he said when she answered her phone.

"Everything okay? I didn't expect to hear from you," Daphne asked as she put down the papers in her hand and started to grab her car keys.

"Nothing's changed. I just needed to hear a friendly voice."

Daphne put down her keys and sat back in her chair. "So..."

"I called Cynthia and Melanie. I had to find out if I was Brian's Medical Proxy and she said I was. Of course, then I had to explain why I needed to know." Justin got out of his chair and helped a pregnant woman with some packages. She was struggling to hold them and the balloons she was carrying.

She smiled at him and mouthed, "thank you." He nodded and continued talking.

"Melanie and Lindsay showed up here a little bit ago. They went in to see Brian and Lindsay broke down crying. They offered to have me stay with them," Justin said as he tried to keep his voice neutral. He slammed his fist on the chair in frustration.

"They had to put Brian on dialysis, too. Oh Daph, I don't know if I can do this."

"Justin Taylor," Daphne scolded him. "You will do this and you will do it well. I'll be there in about..." She looked at her watch. "Twenty- five minutes. We can talk when I get there."

Justin sighed as he wiped away a stray tear that had fallen down his cheek. "Thanks, you're the best."

Daphne laughed, "Don't you forget it. I'll find you in the ICU waiting room."

Justin knew he couldn't see Brian for at least thirty minutes, and he didn't want to go back to the waiting area. He put on his coat and scarf and walked down to the gas station to buy some cigarettes. There was too much going on for him to think about quitting smoking now.

He smoked a cigarette on his walk back. What am I going to do if he doesn't wake up? Do I have the ability to tell the doctors to pull the plug? Wait a minute, Taylor, he isn't dying and Dr. Houston never said he was at death's door. He's just in a coma. Mind you, no one knows if and when he'll ever wake up. This is a different kind of hell than what he had to face with Ted. Ted was connected to all kinds of machines. The only machines Brian has are not life-saving. Geez, leave it to Brian to have a medical crisis that isn't life threatening, but still very serious. He will wake up. He's too stubborn to stay in a coma, besides I have to kick his ass a thousand ways from Sunday. He savored each puff, and was sad when he arrived at the hospital, since that meant he couldn't smoke another one.

He took off his coat when he entered the hospital and took the elevator up to the ICU floor. There was a young man sitting by the window, just staring out the glass and Justin approached him.

‘Hi,' Justin said as he stuck out his hand to shake the other man's.

"Hi," the man said back. "I'm waiting for the doctor. My wife was in a car accident. They don't know if she'll make it," he said as tears rolled down his eyes. "We've only been married three years."

"I'm sorry,' Justin said.

"Who are you here for?"

"My partner. He's in a coma and on dialysis," Justin said with little emotion. He was surprised that he didn't choke up when he explained Brian's condition. He didn't think that after two days he'd be used to it.

"I'm sorry. I hope he gets better," the man said as he stood up. "I see her doctor coming out of her room, and I want to talk to him.

"Thank you. I hope your wife is okay," Justin said as he looked at the clock. Time had managed to flow, and he could see Brian again.

The machines in Brian's room were still loud, and Brian still hadn't moved.

"I guess I'm talked out. Bet you never thought you'd hear that? Anyway I'm just going to sit with you," Justin said as he pulled the chair closer to the bed. He ran his finger over Brian's arm and softly caressed his face. He traced his lips with his finger. They were dry and cracked. He took out the lip balm he always carried and applied some to Brian's lips. Brian hated kissing him when he put the balm on, but Justin always told him to get over it, as he would hate kissing cracked lips more.

"I love you. Please let the machines work and help you wake up," Justin said as he leaned over Brian to touch their foreheads together. "Later," he whispered when it was time to go.

He walked out of the room and saw Daphne waiting in the family area.

"Daph," he said softly as he hugged her. "Thanks."

"No problem. I got to work kind of early today so I could skip out," she said as she returned his hug. "How's Brian?"

"The same. I..." Justin started to talk, but then tears began to fall.

Daphne held him while he cried. When he stopped, she pulled him toward some chairs.
"Justin, I can't tell you it will be fine. I'm here for you. Do you want to go home?"

Justin looked at his friend and was very grateful for her friendship. He knew she would be there to listen to his ranting and hold him when he needed it.

"I can't. Visiting hours aren't over till 9:00."

"Justin, he didn't even come see you when you were in the hospital. Why do you need to be here every waking moment?" Daphne said with irritation.

"That happened six years ago and things are different now. Since then he's told me he loved me and even asked me to marry him. How can I abandon him?"

Daphne held Justin with both hands at arm's length. "Justin Taylor. You are no longer obligated to that man in there. He told you so last summer when he broke your heart yet again. I can't believe I just heard you say that."

Justin pushed her hands off his arms and looked defiantly at Daphne. "I don't expect you to understand us. The fact that Brian didn't change his Medical Proxy means a lot. He still cares for me, and in his twisted mind he thinks that if he tells me to go away it's for my own good. Not necessarily what he wants, but for my own good. I need to stay."

Daphne looked at her best friend, seeing the determined look and love in his eyes. She couldn't deny that they made a great, if exasperating couple. "Okay, but have you eaten?"

"I ate lunch about 2:00. I'm not really hungry."

Laughing, Daphne said, "You, not hungry. Hurry, someone call Guinness."

Justin punched her in the arm, and he laughed as well.

They talked quietly together the rest of the evening. Justin went into Brian's room once an hour and talked to him, but Brian never stirred. After Justin's last visit, he returned to the nurse's station.

"I'm leaving for the evening. Please call me if Brian's condition changes."

The nurse smiled at Justin and said, "Of course, Mr. Taylor, but we really don't expect any changes for a few days."