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Justin turned around with a huge smile on his face. Placing his messenger bag over his shoulder, he left the room.

He waited only for a few minutes for Daphne to pull up. Tonight, he placed the bag in the back seat and turned up the CD in the player.

"What's up, Justin. You look like you won the lottery," Daphne said as she pulled into traffic.

"Brian told me to bring up his mail so I could help him with his bills." Justin bounced along with the music.

"But you don't have that kind of money, Justin. What was he thinking?" Daphne demanded.

"That's where you're wrong. He told me that he put my name on all his accounts when we were going to get married. He never changed them." Justin smiled one of his ‘Sunshine smiles' as Debbie called them. "He soooo loves me."

"I guess you're right. He must love you to let you have access to all his money."

"I don't care about his money and he knows that. Hell, half the time he yells at me because all my clothes come from the Gap and I take the bus everywhere. He hates my place in New York, and is constantly reminding me about the luxury I should be living in."

"Yeah, you never were really part of the country club set," Daphne giggled as she eyed his cargo pants and blue hoodie. "What do you want to do tonight? It's Saturday night and I don't have to go to work tomorrow."

"Right now, I want to go home and shower. We'll talk after I eat. Hospital food really is as bad as everyone says."

Daphne maneuvered her car through the streets of Pittsburgh and they sang along with the CD as she drove. When they got home, Justin went straight to the bathroom for a shower, and Daphne put away her purchases from earlier in the day.

When Justin finished his shower Daphne took one. Justin went into the kitchen, looking through the cabinets for dinner ingredients. He found some noodles and a jar of spaghetti sauce as well as a package of ground beef in the freezer. He defrosted the beef and added some spices to the pre-made sauce. He cooked the noodles and was draining them when Daphne came out of her bedroom with a towel wrapped around her head.

"So, what you making?" She asked as she took out the plates to set the table.

"Spaghetti. It's easy and you had the ingredients handy." Justin placed the noodles in a big bowl and then stirred the sauce.

Daphne went over to the stove, lifting the spoon out of the pot to take a taste. "Its good," she said as she took another taste.

Justin moved her out of the way as he mixed the sauce with the noodles and beef. "Glad you like it. Poor starving artists have to know how to cook to stay alive in expensive New York." He brought the bowl to the table. "You ready? I'm starving."

Daphne removed the towel, went to the bathroom, brushed her hair, and then returned to the table. "Sure." She sat down and placed some spaghetti on her plate. "Speaking of expensive New York, do you think Brian intended to give you money since he put your name on his accounts?"

Justin put a heaping mound of spaghetti on his plate. He picked up his fork, twirled it around the noodles, and plopped the food in his mouth. He didn't answer her until he had three more forkfuls of the spaghetti.

"Brian is Brian and he does what he wants to do. He offered to help pay some of my expenses when I first went to New York, but since we haven't really talked since this summer, he obviously hasn't said anything about it lately." Justin took a drink of his beer and ate another forkful of spaghetti. "Besides, I wouldn't have accepted his money. I needed to do New York on my own terms."

"Why do you think he put your name on the accounts?" Daphne said, and then ate another bite of spaghetti.

"I told you. We were going to get married so he changed all his accounts."

"But, Justin, you didn't get married. Why is your name still on them?"

Justin wiped his mouth. "Daph, promise you won't tell anyone this?"

"Of course. Who would I tell? Your mother? Michael? Lindsay? Debbie. Come on, dish, Justin."

"The night before I left we talked, or sort of talked for us. I told him we'd still see each other and he said "It's only time." He said it didn't matter if we saw each other next week, next month, or ever again. Daph, I know that is Brian speak for ‘it is only a matter of time until we are together.' Neither one of us knew when we would see each other again, but I think we both knew that at some time in the future we would be back together," Justin said as he smiled at the thought.

"That's it. That's your big secret. Justin, you are such a romantic." Daphne drank some of her beer and picked at the label on the bottle. "Look, I'm sure you're tired of talking and thinking about Brian, let's do something fun tonight." Daphne got out of her chair and turned on the computer. "Let's see what's playing at the movies."

Justin placed the left over spaghetti in a container and cleared the plates. When all remnants of dinner were cleared, he went to stand by Daphne, looking at the computer screen.

"Nothing sounds good. Why don't we go dancing? I haven't been to Babylon in ages," Justin said as he put his hand on his stomach and moved his ass a little to the imaginary music.

"You sure that's a good idea? Don't you think that would bring back some bad memories?" Daphne looked at Justin as he danced.

"Daph, its not like he's gone or we've broken up. He's just not going to be there tonight."

She looked at Justin like he'd lost his mind. "I seem to remember a really pissed off man who sat in this very apartment last summer, saying he never wanted to see Brian Fucking Kinney ever again. I get that he gave you his Medical Proxy and Power of Attorney and that he put your name on his accounts, but you're acting like you two are married, and you're not, Justin. You're not married and if he hadn't overdosed, you wouldn't even be here." Daphne got up and went into her bedroom, closing the door.

Justin stopped dancing, standing in Daphne's living room with his mouth open. He went into the kitchen and filled the sink up with water so he could wash the pots from dinner. As he washed, he replayed the short conversation in his head. She's right. We're not together and this is exactly how I've gotten hurt in the past. In the last few weeks, I've found out some things that I don't think Brian was ready to let me know. I've got to be careful or we'll be back where we were in July.

Justin dried his hands on the dish towel that hung on the oven. He went to Daphne's door, knocking quietly. "Can I come in?" he asked.

"Sure. It's unlocked."

"I'm sorry, Daphne. My emotions are just on a roller coaster. First Brian's in a coma and I find out I have to make medical decisions that may affect his life, and then I find out that he has my name on his accounts. He's anchored me into his life, and I didn't even know it. What am I going to do?" Justin asked as he lay on her bed, his head hung off the side.

Daphne joined him in his pose on her bed. "You take it one day at a time. Now, do you have Brian's bills, or do you need to go to the loft to get them? Can you get into the loft?"

Justin sat up. "That makes me dizzy. I can get in the loft, and yes, I need to go over there since I don't have his bills, or any of his other stuff. Now that he's awake, maybe he'd like his own shampoo and shaving cream. I could bring it to him." Justin got up, grabbing his messenger bag from his room. He took some paper out and started making a list of things he needed to get from the loft. He looked at his watch. "Shit its 8:30. It will take me two hours to go there and come back. I better leave now." He stood up and started walking to the door.

"Stop right there. I have a perfectly good car and I'm taking you to the loft. You can grab what you need, and then we will go rent Borat."

Justin turned and gave her a hug. "Thanks, Daphne. You're the best."

She smiled and punched him lightly on the upper arm. "That's what best friends are for."
__________________________________________________


Daphne and Justin drove in silence to the loft. After fishing out his key, they rode the elevator and he punched in the code so they could enter Brian's home. Justin stopped dead in his tracks as he pulled open the heavy door. He stepped back in time as if nothing had changed.

He saw Brian sitting at the computer, surfing for porn. He saw Brian coming out of the bathroom, towel wrapped around his waist, still slightly damp from the shower. Another vision of Brian grabbing a bottle of water from the stainless steel refrigerator where only poppers and left overs were kept, and a final vision of Brian lying in the bed, bathed with the glow of the neon blue light.

"You okay?" Daphne asked, concern evident in her voice.

"Yeah." Justin shrugged. "Just... it's been eight months since I was here and it seems like yesterday. I see Brian coming out of every corner. It's weird, to say the least." Justin walked around the loft, touching the coffee table and then the island between the kitchen and the living room. "The cleaning lady must have cleaned after she called the ambulance. Nothing's out of place." Justin shivered. "She must have really freaked out when she saw him there and couldn't wake him up."

Justin lay on the floor, "I've fallen and I can't get up," he mimicked and then burst out into nervous laughter.

Daphne giggled. "Justin, you're terrible."

"I know, but I could so see Brian doing that. Can't you?"

"Yeah, I can. Where is his mail delivered?"

"Shit. I forgot. It's in the mail box and I bet its overflowing." Justin went downstairs and emptied the overstuffed mailbox. At the top of the pile was a note indicating the super had been given the remainder of the mail. He knocked on the door of the super.

"Mr. Sonner. I don't know if you remember me, but I'm Justin Taylor. Brian's friend. I came to get his mail. I guess I should have come earlier," Justin spoke very fast, trying to get the words out.

"Yeah, you look familiar. How's Kinney? He sure scared Mrs. O'Connor when she found him on the floor a few weeks ago. He gonna be okay?"

"He's better. Thanks for asking. Do you have the mail? It's late and I'm sure you'd like to get back to your evening."

"Yeah. It's right here. He sure gets a lot of magazines. Can't see how he has the time to read em all," Mr. Sonner said as he handed Justin a large pile of mail. "You gonna be getting his mail or should I still collect it?'

Justin looked up from glancing at the mail. "Ohh, Umm. Could you still collect it for him? I'm not sure how often I'll get by here."

"Sure thing. See you, and tell Kinney I hope he gets better."

"Thanks," Justin said as he shook the man's hand and returned to the loft.

Justin opened the heavy door and laid the pile on the table.

"Geez. He gets more magazines than me!" Daphne exclaimed from her seat on the white leather sofa. "I don't know how he has time to read them with the hours he works and the partying he does at Babylon."

"That's what Mr. Sonner said. How do you know about the hours he works and the trips to Babylon, Daphne? Are you holding out on me?" Justin frowned as he looked at Daphne. He walked over to the couch, sitting down next to her.

"I used to run into him on Liberty Avenue some times. He'd ask how you were."

"You shit. How come you never told me?" Justin demanded.

"It never came up. I know you were really hurt after what went down last summer and I didn't want to see you hurt again," Daphne explained.

"Then why the inquisition when I came here to be with him? Daphne Chanders, are you in cahoots with Brian?" Justin picked up the mail and began sorting it.

"No. I'm not in cahoots with him. It's just...."

Justin looked up from his mail sorting. "Just what...?"

"I think you're right. Brian pushed you off another cliff and I could see he was miserable, and so were you." Daphne sat next to Justin and put her arms around him, giving him a half hug. "You guys need to figure this out. You used to call his drinking and drugging 'pain management'. I think he needs to learn a different way to manage his pain, or next time he won't have any pain to manage. He'll be dead."

Justin put down all the mail and turned toward Daphne, giving her a big hug as tears rolled down his cheeks. "Daph, what am I going to do?" he lamented.

Daphne returned his hug and held him while he cried and recomposed himself. "You'll figure it out, Justin. The question is really what are the two of you going to do?" She pulled out of the hug and sat up straight. "Why don't I sort through the mail- magazines in one pile, bills in another and everything else in this pile," she said as she started sorting the six-inch stack of paper. "Why don't you gather his toiletries and anything else he might want?"

"Okay." Justin walked toward the bathroom, turning before he entered. "Thanks Daphne. I owe you so much for all your help."

"Justin.... That's what best friends are for. Now go. I don't want all the copies of Borat to be checked out before we get to the video store."

Justin mock saluted her and went into the bathroom to gather the toiletries. He opened the shower and the smell of Brian hit him.

He saw himself standing in the shower with Brian, facing the tiles while the water cascaded down his back. Brian standing behind him, kissing his neck, between his shoulder blades as he ran his hands down his back. He could feel Brian massaging his ass, then parting his cheeks as he played with his hole. He heard the condom wrapper open and the crinkle of the plastic as Brian took out the latex cover. He could feel Brian's huge cock as it pushed into his hole as he hissed at the intrusion, but then he pushed back to meet Brian. He could feel the sway of their bodies as they met their most primal needs and something else that he couldn't put into words, but that was always there when they were together.

"You about done in there?" Daphne yelled.

Her voice brought Justin out of his memories, shaking his head to clear the vivid vision. "Yeah," he said as he placed the shampoo, soap and $100 tube of eye cream in his arm. "He's a beauty queen, but at least he doesn't have a cabinet full of product like Emmett."

Daphne walked into the bedroom, stopping at the doorway as she watched Justin gather Brian's things.

"Emmett always makes me laugh when I see him giving Ted a beauty treatment. I always wonder where he picks up that stuff." Justin walked into the bedroom and placed the products in Brian's kit. He opened the closet and pulled out a few loose shirts. "He doesn't have a robe or anything like that. We talked about buying him one the last time Gus was here. Brian said Gus was getting too old to see us parade around buck naked," Justin commented off handedly. He lay on Brian's side of the bed, placing his head on Brian's pillow. He closed his eyes as he inhaled Brian's scent. Opening his eyes, he saw a picture frame placed on the night stand.

"Oh my!" He enthused. "He's got a picture of me and Gus by his bed." Justin picked up the picture, and lovingly ran his finger across the outline of them. "Daphne, he really didn't mean those words last summer. You'll see. When this is over..."

Daphne walked to Justin and took the picture frame out of his hand, placing it back on the night stand. "Have you seen Gus? How is he taking Brian's situation?"

"No, I haven't seen him. I told the girls that it probably wouldn't be a good idea since he always associates me with seeing Brian. He's still too young to understand that we're not together." Justin stopped his explanation and sat up, running his hand through his hair. "Maybe, now that Brian's out of ICU, the girls will bring him by. I'd love to see him." Justin folded the few shirts, placing them and Brian's kit into an overnight bag. "There. A few comforts from home. Where's the mail?"

Daphne pointed to the table and the three piles. Justin took the overnight bag, setting it down on the floor next to the coffee table. He picked up the top three magazines- Architectural Digest, Advertising Age and Newsweek. He took the entire stack of bills and glanced through the other mail.

"Most of these are solicitations. I never knew so many places wanted his money. I'm not surprised, but still.... I guess after this experience, Mr. Brian Kinney will not have as many secrets as he used to," Justin said as he smirked.

"Are you done, drama princess?" Daphne teased.

"Yeah, I'm good," Justin said as he looked at the clock on the microwave. "It's only 11:00. We should have plenty of time to pick up Borat and watch it tonight." Justin turned and hugged Daphne. They walked out of the loft as Justin made sure to reset the alarm and lock the door.

They drove back to Daphne's, stopping at the video store, and renting Borat. after their arrival, they popped a big bowl of popcorn and ate it while they watched the movie.

"That was so funny. I can see why it got great reviews," Daphne commented as she took the popcorn bowl to the kitchen to wash.

Justin grabbed their glasses and brought those into the kitchen as well. "Yeah. I'm just glad it wasn't me in bed with the diplomat. That would have freaked me out."

"Yeah," Daphne said with a grimace. "He was seriously gross."

Yawning, Justin stretched and then gave Daphne a kiss on the cheek. "You gonna bring me to the hospital tomorrow, or do I need to catch the bus?"

"Nah, I'll take you. Maybe I'll even pay the esteemed Mr. Kinney a visit. Tell him a few things," Daphne kidded as she washed the popcorn bowl.

"Daphne, please keep it light. I've got enough to deal with." Justin grabbed a bottle of water from the refrigerator and drank half of it. He picked up the dishcloth to dry the big bowl.

"Justin, it's a joke. I'm not Michael or Debbie. I'll probably pop in to see Brian, but you know I'll behave."

He placed the bowl in its place in the lower cabinet and turned to Daphne. "Yeah, I know. Good night."

"Good night, Justin. I'll see you in the morning," she said as she placed the glasses in the dishwasher and turned out the lights.
_______________________________________________________________________

They woke up a little after 9:00 the next morning, and ate a light breakfast of cereal and milk. The drive to the hospital was quick, since the traffic was light. Daphne parked the car in the garage and Justin grabbed the overnight bag.

"Why don't you go up and see Brian? I want to stop at the gift shop," Daphne said as she grinned an evil smile.

"Why Daphne Chanders, I think you might be thinking of getting Brian a gift."

"Maybe. I think I should get him a cane. That would make him sooo happy," Daphne joked.

"Don't Daphne," Justin said softly. "We can joke, but he's really sensitive right now."

"Justin, I wouldn't do anything like that. I like Brian, most of the time, except when he's treating you like shit. I'll get him something... maybe some chocolate."

"Whatever. I'm going upstairs. This is heavy." Justin carried the overnight bag into the hospital and up to Brian's room. When he was outside the door, he heard voices inside and he waited to enter.

"Brian. I can take care of you. Tell Justin to go home. He doesn't belong here. He's just using you. When are you finally going to get him out of your life for good?" Michael urged Brian.

Justin walked in after he heard Michael's disparaging remarks. He put down the overnight bag and deliberately walked over to Brian, giving him a kiss on the lips. Brian returned the kiss enthusiastically.

"Good morning, Sunshine. Why don't you tell the nurse I'm ready to get up," Brian suggested as he waved Justin out the door.

"Okay. Be right back."

Justin returned a few moments later with the nurse.

"Mikey, I've got to get up. Why don't you come back later?" Brian said as he moved to place his arms around the nurse's neck.

"But Brian...." Michael began to counter.

"Not now, Michael. Justin and I have things to discuss and I need quiet to do them. Go along and I'll see you later."

Justin grinned at Brian's dismissal of Michael. He was feeling better all ready. 

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