<img src="stories/24/images/Metamorphosis_Banner.jpg">

Title: Metamorphosis… 
Story Type: AU
Word Count: 3637
Rating: R, Porn…
Warnings: Passion and Lust…
Beta Queen: bigj52 
Banner: yvonnereid 


Summary: It’s all gone in just moments; your life changes and there’s no going back. You’re no longer the person you thought you were and you have no idea who you’ll become.

Chapter Summary: Brian and Justin start couples therapy and Michael comes to grips with Brian’s accident.

Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable charters, settings, plot, etc. are property of their respective owners, including, but not limited to Russell T. Davies, Cowlip, and Showtime. The author of this story is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended…

Metamorphosis… 

It took losing you to finally let myself love you…

Part Three ~ Torture, Shrunken Heads and Bridezilla

Chapter Seven ~ Leaving the Pain in the Past…

After dinner Justin gave everyone a tour of the house and the new business, Kinnetik; they even met Sarah-Jane in the art department as she finished up for the day. Gus pulled Em along by his hand. He only cares about showing the guys his room, the rest is just boring. Ted and Em stay to play with Gus while Justin shows Michael to Brian’s office so they can have a private conversation.

Once inside, the flood gates open and Michael loses it, crying, sitting next to Brian, holding him and as usual in their totally dysfunctional relationship Brian comforts Michael. They lean their heads together and Brian sincerely apologizes for leaving Michael in the dark and out of his life. He uses his standard excuse that he thought that it was better this way, inconvenience, blah, blah, blah… You know the speech…

Once Michael has his emotions under control the boys sit back and smoke a joint, listening to songs from their wild teenage youth. “I’ve missed you, Michael; I missed just hanging out and just being us.”

“Me too, you know you didn’t have to stay away.”

“Yeah, I did… I still do; I know you can’t understand but I just can’t. I can’t go back there in this chair… It’s… It’s humiliating, it’s not me. I won’t let it be me.”

He’s shouting now and Justin is standing just outside the door in case he needs him. But Justin realizes he just needs to vent and Michael is his venting partner, just like Daphne is his. He wishes this wasn’t so hard for him because he’s doing so much better all the time; Brian Kinney has never been a patient man. 

Michael can’t help noticing how Brian’s body looks great, saying, “You’re still young and beautiful! You’re Brian Fucking Kinney! Fuck the chair!”

“Actually I use ‘Taylor-Kinney’.”

“Of course you do? Who are you?”

They both burst out laughing and Michael lights the joint again and Brian asks about the new boyfriend. “Oh my God, Brian, Ben…Ben is the best. Wait, you know Ben. How do you know Ben? I didn’t want to ask in front of Barbara… Barbara fucking Walters…

Michael actually squeals with excitement. “She was so nice.”

They talk some more about how Red Cape is doing and how Ben and Michael are looking for their own apartment. They light the joint again and Michael forgets all about asking Brian about Ben.

A couple of minutes later Brian smiles that goofy smile he gets when he’s stoned and leans in and says; “So Mikey how would you like to be my best man?”

“Really?”

“Well, yeah, I mean who else would I ask and we’re still best friends, right?”

“Fuck, Yeah!”

Michael hugs Brian and for the first time he’s truly happy for both of them. They seem to have found themselves partners that actually put up with them and their childish ways.

~~~~

Brian hates the idea of seeing a shrink, but once Alex arrives it’s always a productive session and Brian always feels like a weight has been lifted from his fragile body. Alex tells him he’s so glad he finally called and asks, “What happened?”

Brian takes a deep breath and says, “I had a bad dream and I couldn’t breathe. I felt so helpless.”

“Tell me about it.”

“I’m running after Justin and I can’t move. I guess maybe I’ve already been struck by the truck, I don’t know. I just know that I’m lying on the concrete and he’s…he’s lying just out of reach, bleeding out on the cement floor. But I can’t move, I can’t get to him, there’s so much blood then he sits up and the fiddler comes and carries him away. And I can’t move and I can’t breathe and I can’t stop it.”

“That must make you feel out of control? Have you ever told Justin about your dreams, or how you feel about the accident or the bashing, or even him leaving you? I hear unresolved issues with you concerning the past.”

“Doc, can’t we just keep the past in the past?”

“Obviously not, since you’re dreaming about it.”

“Yeah…”

“Brian, why don’t we ask Justin to join us?”

“Now? Today?”

“Is that a problem?”

“No, it’s just that I didn’t expect it.”

“So you’re alright if I ask him to come in?”

Brian just looks at Alex and then turns away; “Fine…”

Brian wonders why he’s so afraid of talking with Justin about his fears; he should be the one person that he can tell anything. Alex returns with Justin and the three of them just sit there in silence for a few minutes.

Finally Alex says; “Brian, why don’t you start by telling Justin how you feel.”

Brian can’t help thinking - about what? Where am I’m I supposed to start? He keeps looking at his hands then he says something he had no idea was going to come out of his mouth.

“What was it that he had that I didn’t? What was it about him that you loved, that you didn’t love about me?”

“What! Nothing! He had nothing over you except pretty words. It was all a delusion full of lies; he slept around on me the very first chance he got. I didn’t mean anything to him. I was just a pretty face, to stand by his side. I’m so sorry I hurt you, Brian. You know I love you…”

“I need something more specific, something about me that I can change so, so you don’t…”

“I won’t… I promise. I know I never will leave you again; it wasn’t you that needed to change, it was me. I needed to grow up and understand what it was that you gave me. And I did a lot of growing up when we were apart, now I appreciate everything you gave me. I even understand you better than you understand yourself, I just lost faith. I needed to hear those three little words.”

“I know I should have told you. I just didn’t know what that feeling was back then and it scared me. It scared me to need you, want you so much. And then Michael told me about the fiddler and I felt like you were already gone. You didn’t even want to try. I was trying but I just didn’t know what to do. So finally I just pushed you away because that’s what I know how to do best.”

Justin crawls up into Brian’s lap and looks into his eyes, asking him if all this is about them getting married soon.

“I don’t know where this is all coming from. It’s just that I’m concerned about you giving up your whole life for me. You have so much to live for and I’ll hold you back. Even if I wasn’t in this chair, I’d be holding you back…”

“Don’t think you’re getting out of marrying me, Mr. Kinney; it’s a little late for changing your mind. Our daughter is due to arrive this spring.”

“Daughter - I don’t think so. I’ve had a little talk with our peanut and he’s definitely my son. Besides Cyn said he’s just as feisty as me.”

“You do realize that he actually is the size of a peanut…”

“See, you said he…”

Justin leans into Brian as Brian kisses his forehead and hairline, loving the feel of its silkiness on his face. Alex is pleased with the progress in today’s session but realizes that they need to have couples therapy for awhile to help them work through their issues and PTSD that he wonders if either one realizes they have.

Alex suggests that the two of them meet together with him for a few weeks as well as Justin meeting with him alone. Justin didn’t expect this but he’s open to doing whatever Dr. Wilder thinks is best for Brian - he can’t see that it’s for him as well yet.

Justin shows Alex out and Brian can’t believe how much better he feels after having carried all that emotional stress around for so long – questioning himself and worrying about their future.

~~~~

Everyone’s at Deb’s for Thanksgiving dinner, even Ben who she still hasn’t warmed up to yet. They’re watching the football games and eating appetizers when there’s a knock on the door. Everyone’s surprised because they’re not expecting anyone else; Justin canceled yesterday at the last minute. Ben saw them pull up and went out to greet them as no one else except Ted knows Brian’s travel van by sight; it’s designed to fit his wheelchair and has a lift.

Justin comes in, saying to Michael; “I got him to agree to come for dinner but he’s leaving before the Barbara Walters Special. Now could you please help me clear a path and make room for him?”

“Make room for who, baby?” spouts Deb.

“My boyfriend. He has some disabilities.”

“Oh, Sunshine, I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”

“Well, please do not act all emotional, he hates that sort of thing.”

“Of course not. I would never do anything so crass.”

Just then Michael comes in with Brian’s wheelchair followed by Ben, carrying Brian. He places him in his chair as Debbie stands there in shock, with tears running down her face. Once Brian is settled in his chair she comes over to him and puts her arms around him, holding him close, whispering, “We’ve missed you, you little asshole!” then she gently smacks him across the back of the head.

Vic’s the next. He bends down and hugs him, simply saying, “Welcome home, Brian.”

Mel just stares, not knowing what to say. If she doesn’t have a mean shot to take at him she really can’t think of a single thing to say, so she says, “Finally I meet Prince Charming!”

Gus comes stumbling down the stairs crying out; “Daddy! Daddy! I knew you’d come.”

Brian’s heart can’t help melting as he sees how much this means to his son to share the holidays. Gus climbs up into his lap and tells Brian that he even made him a Thanksgiving Day hat because he was so sure that he was coming.

Brian noticed all the construction paper pilgrim hats when he came in. He says, “Oh, I thought maybe we were going to re-enact the Salem witch trials. You know I’m pretty sure they were all lesbians…”

“Brian, really!” Lindsay huffs.

Michael and Ted are just snorting and laughing; Gus doesn’t understand what’s so funny. He likes all the hats and insists that everyone put theirs on. Of course Gus made Brian’s the same size as his, so he looks ridiculous in it, but he wears it anyways because his son made it and he loves him.

Debbie serves a huge spread; turkey and all the fixings, spaghetti with meatballs as well as linguini with white clam sauce, multiple salads, fresh fruits, cheese, olives and shellfish. Dessert was even more outrageous with pecan, pumpkin, apple, blueberry and lemon meringue pies.

Brian’s so glad he has his chair; he’s so full he couldn’t walk even if he could… It’s funny - he was so sure seeing everyone and being in his chair would change everything and the way people treated him but it didn’t… He was wrong. All this time he was wrong… Justin leans into him and gives him a big kiss. Brian thanks him for pushing him to come.

Brian says, “Let’s take these hats home so we can play witch hunt…”

“You do realize that you’re the one that’s going to be burnt at the stake, little boy… he he he…”

“I love being burnt on your stake. Let’s go home.”

After the boys have departed and the games are all over everyone settles in for the BWS. Deb is still in the kitchen finishing up when Michael calls to her and Vic to hurry up.

“You’re going to miss the beginning…”

‘Now tonight on the Barbara Walters Special, she will be interviewing author B.K. Taylor about his new book - A Love That Will Never Die. That’s the sequel to his bestseller, Three Little Words which is now number one on the New York Times bestseller list.’

Deb and Vic come running into the room and see Brian sitting on a sofa that the boys recognize as the one from Brian’s office. Deb and Vic both just stand there with their mouths wide open. Deb finally says, “Holy Shit… My Brian’s famous…”

Shock isn’t quite the right word and it’s the first time something has surprised her so much that she’s actually speechless as she watches the show unfold in front of her. She didn’t want to ask questions when Brian was here and now the BWS was explaining to everyone that he was in an accident, without mentioning any details of how it happened. He highlights the writing process he went through as part of his therapy.

Finally focusing on Ben’s research study, he shows the audience how important it is to support medical research and just how far things have come in the last twenty-five to thirty years. The last clip is of Brian and his buddies playing basket ball, practicing for the local Paralympics. Brian’s actually really good, but then again he always was athletic.

~~~~

“What do you mean I can’t have black and black as our wedding colors?”

“Brian, it’s a spring wedding.”

“I know but it’s at night.”

“I can at least have black as one of my colors, right?”

Emmett rolls his eyes and suggests navy-blue suits with powder blue shirts.

Justin’s hanging back in the kitchen; he can hear Brian yelling from the living room.

“It’s my wedding! I’ll have whatever I want.”

“Of course it is, and you can. It’s just that…well, black is just so dreary…”

“I’m not a queen! I don’t do pastels! I want black! I might even wear a tuxedo - A BLACK TUXEDO!!!”

Justin enters the room.

“Who wants lemonade?” 

Brian snarks, “Make mine with vodka.” Justin sits on his lap, running his hands through his hair. “Shush… Whatever you want…”

“I’d love you in a black tuxedo and a gray shirt - that’s just fine if that’s what you want. But I was thinking, maybe you could wear a deep purple shirt and I could wear a lavender shirt and we’d wear the same suit or tuxedo….your choice.”

“I love that idea. Why don’t you just think that one over and we’ll move on to the menu or flowers…your choice?” Emmett says, trying to placate Brian.

“Well I’ll….” Brian says then he looks at Justin.

“I think we would like a formal sit-down dinner with full service and a full bar. And I mean full - all the best name brands of alcohol but of course, no one drives home drunk. So don’t let them serve anyone who looks like they’ve had too much to drink. I don’t want anyone to end up like me although I wasn’t drunk… I wasn’t… not really…”

Justin looks at Em and just smiles, nodding slightly just to let him know that this is a good thing. Brian needs to let it all out and talk about it, to help him accept it. To break the tension Brian realizes exists in the room he says, “What band should we get? It’s been so long since I’ve danced.”

That was enough to crack a smile from both Em and Justin. Em continues with, “I have scheduled a sampling of menus from five of the best local restaurants so next week you’ll be having dinner served here each night for five nights. Saturday afternoon Jen, Deb, Daph and Cyn are all meeting here to have the cheesecake tasting with both of you. I understand that’s what you want. Right, Justin?”

“We can have more than one type of cheesecake, right?”

“Of course, baby. you can have two cakes - a wedding cake and a groom’s cake.”

“But we’re both grooms.”

“Well, then, you can have three cakes, and the tiers on the wedding cake could be different flavors.”

Brian crinkles his nose and says, “One cake, maybe two flavors, not a rainbow of flavors. I want this to be very classic - not the Pride Wedding of the Year.”

“For flowers, I think Brian and I should have corsages of pale lavender roses and for the tables, large bouquets of white lilies, purple roses and Dutch iris. 

“Now onto the linens and china. Do you want white and pale lavender? We can rent anything…”

~~~~

“Justin, do you still have problems using your hand?” asks Dr. Wilder.

“What… my hand? You don’t want to talk about Brian?”

“I’m sure we will. I just wanted to talk about you first, if that’s alright. Does Brian know that you’re still having problems with your hand?”

“No, I don’t want to worry him and it’s not all the time, so…”

“How long can you use it before it gets too painful?”

“Twenty minutes or so, I guess.”

“You know you could be doing more physical therapy with Brian to help strengthen the muscles in your hand. You should talk with Ben about what might be helpful. I know you were resistant when it first happened but you’re older and wiser now.”

“You think I should go into physical therapy?”

Alex just grins and says, “So how was your week with Mr. Snarky? Is he getting any better?”

“I came to surprise him and have lunch at the rehab center and I saw him working out with Ben and Bruce. He was trying to walk in the pool; they were holding him and it was really difficult for him. I could practically see tears in his eyes but he wouldn’t quit. I couldn’t watch. I had to leave. I knew he wouldn’t want me to see him like that.”

“He’s a very proud man and he’s worked very hard to get so far. When I first started treating Brian I didn’t know if he would ever want to get out of his bed, let alone walk. I know that part of it has a lot to do with you being here. He needs to prove to himself he can be the man you once knew. I don’t discourage him; he needs to stay positive, even if it’s not completely realistic.”

“He’s a very protective and passionate man but he would never want anyone to know.”

“You really love him.”

“Yeah, right from the start; I really went after him.”

“It seems you won.”

Justin’s all smiles then he frowns and says; “I had a lot of growing up to do as well.”

“That’s part of life, but you can’t blame yourself for Brian’s accident nor can he blame himself… it was an accident.”

“I know, but…”

“No buts… and the same with the bashing… it’s no one’s fault. Now you two need to start working on your current issues once you get past all that. So please talk with each other and be there for each other.”

“Yes, Doc.”

~~~~

“God! I can’t stop thinking about seeing the ultrasound; she looked so beautiful.”

“He looked strong and healthy. I can’t wait to meet my son.”

“Brian, I’m so glad we decided to call her Darryl, so when she’s born you won’t be disappointed she’s not a boy.”

“And when he’s a boy…”

“Shut up and kiss me…”



Justin’s POV

I push Brian down on the bed and crawl up his body like a cat in heat. I stop to lick and nip at his flesh until I reach his nipples and I take one in my mouth and gently suck while softly twisting and pulling on the other one. It isn’t long before I hear him purring with delight, he’s such a horn dog, always ready. I just have to look at him a certain way and he’s hard.

I switch nipples and continue stimulating him, making him squirm and writhe. I pull my head level with his and kiss him passionately, asking him what he wants, what he needs tonight. I always want to give him what he needs.

He smiles and says; “Make love to me, facing me, like your first time…”

They put their foreheads together and whisper ‘I love you’ to each other. Justin gently lifts Brian’s legs up onto his shoulders, running his hands down his thighs and calves. He can feel Brian shiver with anticipation and that makes both of them smile. Justin slips a finger deep into Brian’s moist pucker and Brian cries out with pleasure; “Ah, yes, Justin!”

Justin slides another finger in and scissors his man open a little more, working and stretching him then he squirts some lube and quickly enters him in one fell swoop. He lets him adjust as he burns and smolders when the sparks start and a built blond twink begins pumping his old man in sweet tender thrusts, increasing the speed with each movement. Rocking and grinding, they hold each other as their bodies speak a language that only they know.

Brian can’t help but suck and lick the side of Justin’s neck, biting him, leaving a large red mark for all to see. Brian’s getting so worked up and excited he knows he’s close so he whispers; “Fuck me, Justin! Oh God! Fuck me good and hard…”

Justin slides his hands down to Brian’s ass and pulls him in closer, slightly shifting then pounding the shit out of Brian’s prostate; he’s spurting like a volcano in a matter of seconds as he cries out Justin’s name passionately.

Justin gets up a few minutes later to retrieve a warm washcloth so they won’t wake up a crusty mess…

TBC…