Chapter 25

"Move in with you? Uh, wow. ...that's a big step.... Are we there? I mean ... move in with you?" Justin said, unable to complete a full sentence or thought. He picked up his fork and moved his salad around the plate. He had not expected that solution.

"Well, it would take care of the cleaning and laundry but do you really want me around all the time? I mean, we were just talking about needing some space to have some separation. If we lived together, I don't know how that would work. While you can afford a cleaning service and someone to do your laundry, I cannot and I don't want to feel like a kept man."

"When is your lease up? I remember you said that you were trying to decide if you were going to stay in the building but you were unsure where you could move. If you moved in with me, you wouldn't have to find a place."

"But I'd still need a studio. I can't imagine myself painting in your loft. I'm messy when I paint," Justin said, warming up to the possibility. "I have to decide in the next month."

"How about you start looking for some studio space and another apartment? In the meantime, we could do a trial run. If you stay over most nights, leave your clothes for the cleaning service or you could throw them in the washer; I do have one in the loft. We could start running all of our errands on Saturday and or Sunday mornings. We could even shop for food on the weekends. We'd still have Mondays for our separate meetings. This way, you don't have to commit to anything and if it doesn't work, then we can try another solution," Brian suggested, hoping Justin would be willing to try.

Justin cut a few bites of his steak and ate them slowly as he mulled over Brian's proposition. There were pros and cons to his idea. However, if they were to move forward with their relationship and it appeared that both of them wanted that, it would be a good test.

"Okay. I'm willing to try. Tomorrow is Thursday. Let me work on getting all my stuff together and I'll come over on Friday like normal. We don't hang out on Thursdays anyway so it will be like normal,' Justin said but added, "Are you really sure about this? I mean it is a big step. And, well, we might get tired of each other pretty quickly."

"We will still have our jobs and will still be attending AA in the evening. In reality, we are only adding a few nights where you stay over and now we'll run our errands together. It should be fine," Brian said, assuring Justin that his idea was sound.

Justin smiled widely and said, "Okay. Let's do this!!!" He leaned over and kissed Brian on the cheek. "Wow. We're going to live together."

Chapter 26

It had been two weeks since Justin moved in. They chose to keep the move quiet, wanting to wait until they decided to make it permanent. Gus was used to Justin spending the night on the weekends and he did not notice anything different. Both men were happy with the arrangement, enjoying each other's company and knowing they would be spending the night together.

It was Sunday night and they had returned from their AA meeting. Brian had gone into the kitchen to start dinner and Justin was sitting on the couch going through his mail. Since his studio was in his apartment building, he grabbed his mail every day but since he wasn't there on Saturday, Brian and he had swung by the building for Justin to pick up his mail from the last few days.

"Great," Justin said as he opened an envelope that appeared to have a check inside.

"What's great?" Brian asked as he called out from the kitchen.

"I got my insurance check. There was a refund on a premium. I could use the money. I have to buy new art supplies," Justin said as he walked toward the kitchen area. He leaned over and gave Brian a quick kiss on the cheek and walked over to the cabinet to take out the pan for the chicken.

"See, I told you that bill paying and reading mail could be accomplished just as easily here as at your apartment." Brian grinned as he pulled the chicken out of the package and placed them in the pan.

"I think your moving in is working out well," Brian said.

"I gotta admit that I am quickly getting used to having a cleaning service. Dusting and doing dishes was never my favorite activity. Also, throwing a load of clothes in when we get back from a meeting is way more convenient than trying to do it all on Sunday night. Still, I have to find a way to clean my painting clothes or figure out a way to wash them during the day and that is a pain. Like I said, it's not like I'm going to send my paint clothes to the dry cleaner, but they still need occasional cleaning, even if I don't care if they are really stain free." Justin added the honey and mustard topping to the chicken. They did not make gourmet food every night.

"I'm happy to hear you say that you are getting used to being here. I told you it would work. It's been two weeks and I see no reason to change things," Brian said,

Justin put the pan in the oven and grabbed the broccoli from the fridge. He took out the cutting board and a sharp knife and started cutting the larger stalks into small florets. "It's only been two weeks and it's been great. But....." Justin hesitated.

"But what? Are you changing your mind?" Brian said, a mix of fear and anger.

Justin put the knife down and turned toward Brian, moving closer and wrapping his arms around his neck and pulling him down for a kiss. They kissed for a few moments and then Justin released him.

"No, I haven't changed my mind, but two weeks really isn't a long time. We're still in the honeymoon stage."

"What the fuck is a honeymoon stage? We're definitely not married so what the fuck is that supposed to mean?" Brian said, his guard going up quickly.

"It's an expression, Brian. That is all. It means that when something is new, it's all shiny and exciting. It's like when two people get married and they go on a honeymoon. It used to be that the honeymoon was the first time people had sex and spent extended time together. They really started to get to know their spouses during the honeymoon," Justin explained the term and Brian's frown increased.

"We are not on a honeymoon! We've known each other for almost a year and I knew full well what I was getting into when I asked you to move in. I wanted you here every night and now you are. End of statement," Brian said, feeling himself getting more frustrated as their talk continued.

Justin could hear the growing unease and frustration coming off Brian and he knew he wanted to de-escalate the situation.

"Brian. Two weeks is really a short time. We haven't had any arguments or disagreements and I still believe that too much togetherness is not a good situation. All I'm saying is that the novelty has not worn off. We'll really be able to tell if this is right when the novelty is gone."

"So, you're telling me that two people living together have to argue. That sounds kind of defeatist. Like you expect there to be trouble," Brian said, questioning Justin's statement.

"Brian, any time you put two people together they are bound to be differences. So, yeah, I guess that means I expect us to disagree. That doesn't mean that we have knockdown drag-out fights or want to be at each other's throats, it just means that I expect we won't agree on everything. Look at us right now, we are disagreeing," Justin said, explaining his thoughts. "And, might I add that we are doing so in a basically civil manner."

Brian took a deep breath and said, "So you're saying that it is inevitable that two people living together are going to disagree on some things?"

"Sure. We disagreed before I moved in. In reality, that is why you suggested I move in the first place. You didn't like that I wanted to go home a few nights a week," Justin reminded him. He finished cutting the broccoli and placed the florets into the steamer basket and placed the basket in the pot, filling it with a few inches of water. He didn't turn on the pot, wanting to wait until the chicken was almost done.

"So what? We just are sitting on a ticking time bomb waiting for one of us to get mad? That sounds even more defeatist."

"Brian, let's be real. Two people from very different backgrounds are bound to have disagreements. I'm not saying that I'm waiting until we have our first fight to decide if I want to move in permanently. I'm just saying that I'm realistic and I realize that as much as you and I may want this to work, there may be times when one of us gets angry and lashes out. That's what people do. They have feelings and emotions and sometimes we get angry at the people we live with and lash out rather than lashing out at the person who is really causing the anger," Justin said as he moved to the living room and patted the seat next to him on the couch.

Brian followed him into the living room and joined him on the couch. "I guess I'm still new to this relationship thing. We haven't had any disagreements and I don't like the thought that it will happen," Brian admitted, glancing at the door rather than at Justin.

Justin reached out for Brian and took his hand in his. "Brian, life is messy. Ask Ted. Ask Molly. Even Gus will tell you that life doesn't go as we all want it to. Conflict is uncomfortable and no one wants it, but we have to be realistic. Conflict, arguments, and disagreements... however you want to label them, happens. It happens to all of us. Some of us have learned to expect it and have coping mechanisms in place to handle it while other people spin out of control anytime it occurs. All I'm saying is that so far we have gotten along great, but I don't expect that to be the case all the time. We will disagree. We will argue and I want both of us to expect that."

"Okay. Okay. Another PSA. I get it. Two people living together will inevitably argue. Can you learn how to argue successfully? It sounds crazy," Brian asked, unsure if he even wanted to go down that route.

"That is actually a good idea, but there is a little catch. Before you can figure out what you want to do differently, you need to know how you handle things now. What do you do when you argue with someone? I'm asking since we really haven't argued per se. You can't change what you don't know," Justin said, explaining how change needs to identify the behavior that needs altering.

"How the fuck should I know? I don't make a habit of arguing with anyone and I sure as hell don't think about how I could have done things differently," Brian said, becoming a little more frustrated with the entire conversation.

The kitchen timer dinged and Brian said, "Chicken's ready. Can we just table this and eat? I have some work I need to finish before I go in tomorrow," Brian asked as he stood up to walk to the kitchen area.

"Sure. It might be better to have the conversation later," Justin agreed, thinking that the best time to have it was after they had a disagreement about something real. Theoretical discussions were always hard to have.

They put the broccoli on to steam as they set the table and sat down to enjoy the honey mustard chicken and broccoli a few minutes later.

"Who knew that broccoli could be so tasty? I always avoided it at restaurants as it was bland, but you've taught me with a few added herbs it can be really good," Brian said as he finished a small piece of broccoli.

"Yeah, a few spices can go a long way. We should experiment with some other spices too. It is no wonder that the spice trade was so influential in settling lands," Justin said as he too finished a floret.

They finished their dinner and talked about their meeting from earlier in the evening. It was a short meal as Brian wanted to work. He helped Justin put away the food and then went to his computer to start work.

Justin wasn't particularly inspired at the moment so he grabbed the remote and turned on the television to watch some new animated show that he'd heard about. He wasn't interested in the plot but was always interested in the way the animators worked. As usual, he quickly picked up his sketch pad and began drawing as he watched. After an hour, he found himself yawning and walked over to Brian.

"Hey, I'm gonna go to bed. I'm beat," Justin said as he leaned over to kiss Brian on the cheek.

"Okay," Brian said as he looked longingly at Justin. "I've still got some work to finish. Are you sure you don't want to wait up?"

Justin shook his head and said, "No. I know you. When you say I've still got work to finish, that could be two or three hours and I have a busy day tomorrow."

Brian frowned, torn between wanting to join Justin and needing to finish his work. "Okay," he said, the disappointment evident in his voice. "I'll be there when I finish up."

A few days later Justin had slept through his alarm and woke up very late. He had less than an hour to get to his meeting with his agent and she did not like to wait. Jumping out of bed, he went into the bathroom to start his shower but did not make the bed. He quickly showered, getting the smell of cum and sweat off his body, but left the towel on the floor instead of hanging it up. He left his toothbrush on the sink instead of replacing it in the cup holder. In the bedroom, he grabbed his underwear from the drawers, but in his haste, he left the drawers open. He went to the closet and pulled a pair of pants from a hangar but the button popped off and he left it on the floor of the closet when he grabbed another pair of pants. In the kitchen, he opened the cabinet, took down a box of pop tarts, and grabbed a package, but left the box on the counter. His phone's alarm went off reminding him to leave and he raced out the door, forgetting to set the alarm. He arrived with just a few minutes to spare, only to find that his agent was still in a meeting and he had to wait.

Brian had a headache and decided to go home a little early, hoping to take a warm shower and maybe lie down for a quick power nap. When he arrived home and put in the code for the loft, he heard the familiar sound that it made when setting. He looked at the door and it was not obviously ajar and did not look like it had been tampered with. He tapped the code in again and the door did not unlock. "Christ! Have I been robbed again?" he said as he punched in the code again and cautiously walked in.

He glanced toward the living area and saw his big screen tv, stereo, and computer were still in their place. A sigh of huge relief came from his chest. It didn't appear that he'd been robbed. He glanced at the kitchen, saw the box of pop tarts on the cabinet, and frowned. Justin should know better than to leave the box on the counter. Then he walked into the bedroom where he found utter chaos. The bed was unmade, and there were drawers open. Justin knew that he hated getting in an unmade bed. He walked into the closet to hang up his suit and found a pair of pants lying on the floor. He shook his head in growing disbelief. Hanging up his suit, he walked into the bathroom to take a piss before he lay down only to find a towel on the floor and Justin's toothbrush on the sink.

He could feel the headache increasing. He pressed his forefinger and thumb on the bridge of his nose, trying to ease the pressure. "Justin," he yelled out loud, knowing that he wasn't there, but still wanting to shout. He peed and then returned to the bedroom where he lay down and closed his eyes, hoping his headache would ease soon. He'd set an alarm to be up in time to go to the AA meeting where he planned on seeing Justin. When the alarm went off, it woke Brian and he found his headache was somewhat dissipated. He dressed and drove to the meeting.

He walked over to Justin but did not hug or kiss him as they were still keeping their relationship quiet when they were at meetings. They had agreed that this was the most appropriate way to handle things as they were there for their sobriety and not in a social situation. The discussion today was about anger. While Brian knew he was angry at Justin, he realized that the anger the leader was talking about was more insidious than what he was feeling. At least his anger was not resulting in him wanting to drink. He was thankful for that. After the meeting, the two men walked toward their respective cars and said they would see each other at home.

They arrived at the same time and parked their cars in the garage, walking up to the building and going in simultaneously. When they arrived at the door, Brian pointed to the alarm pad and said, "See this. It is an alarm. You are supposed to set it every time you leave." He pushed the buttons to let them in.

"Yeah I know," Justin said, not sure why Brian's statement was directed at him.

"Evidently, you forgot. I came home early today and found it unlocked. Don't do it again," Brian said, his anger starting to show.

They walked in and Justin put his messenger bag down on the couch and turned to kiss Brian but Brian sidestepped him.

"Brian?" Justin asked, aware for the first time that there was something going on with Brian.

"I came home early today as I had a headache. The alarm was not set and thankfully no one decided to help themselves to my stuff. However, the loft was a disaster. There was a box of pop tarts on the counter. The bed was unmade. The bathroom was a disaster. Your towel was on the floor and your toothbrush was on the sink. And when I went to hang up my suit, I almost tripped on your damn pants that you left on the floor."

"I was running late. I didn't have time," Justin said, responding to the litany of complaints.

"Making a bed takes 2 minutes and putting your toothbrush in the cup takes maybe 5 seconds. Hanging your towel up and putting your pants back on a hangar shouldn't take long either. And the pop tart box involves a few extra hand movements. It all would be less than 5 minutes. But no, you couldn't take 5 minutes and I came home to a house that looked like a tornado had hit it," Brian said, his anger now in full force.

"My agent really gets mad if I'm late. She is always telling me that her time is valuable," Justin said, defending his actions.

"So your agent is more important than me?" Brian asked, accusing Justin of choosing his work over Brian.

"I didn't say that. I just said..."

"I heard you the first time. Your agent gets mad if you're late. Well, I get mad if you leave my home in shambles. I expect to come home to a clean home, where everything is in its place. I don't like chaos," Brian said.

"Your house?" Justin asked, making sure he heard correctly.

"It is my house, so yeah," Brian said, unsure why Justin was asking.

"Oh. I see. Then maybe this isn't the right time to do this," Justin said waving his hand to encompass the space.
"What the fuck are you talking about? Not the right time. Justin?" Brian asked, feeling a clenching in his body as he looked at Justin.

"I get that this is your place and you are used to it looking a specific way but if I move in permanently, I want it to be our place. Not the place I moved into. Look, Brian. I agreed to move in and we would give it a trial run. But if this is going to work, you're gonna have to stop thinking of things as yours or mine," Justin said, hopeful that Brian could understand the nuances of the situation.

"So, what are you exactly saying? I have to live with your mess?" Brian asked, feeling the tightness in his body increasing.

" All I'm saying is that if this is going to work, you have to stop thinking as this is your home and start thinking of it as our home. I will not move in if I feel like like a guest," Justin said, explaining his position and the consequences of Brian's decision.

"So...., let me get this straight. I have to agree to live with your mess or you won't move in?"

Justin shook his head. "You aren't listening, Brian. I never said that you have to live with my mess. I agree. I should pick up after myself and that is fine. This is a deeper issue. If we're going to do this, this has to be our home and we have to make the rules together. It can't be this is your home and you make all the rules. If it is your home, then I will find an apartment."

"Jesus Justin. My home, our home, your home, what the fuck is the difference? They are just words," Brian said as he pinched the bridge of his nose. "It's a place to keep your shit and sleep."

Justin sighed and sat down, running his hands over his face. "I think of home as my refuge, my safe place. So do you or you wouldn't get so worked up over the mess everywhere. But a home is not four walls, it is a place where we are together, away from the world. All I'm saying is that if I'm going to move in I need to feel this is my refuge, not a place that you are just allowing me to be and you make all the rules."

Brian listened to Justin and heard what he was actually saying this time. "I get it. We make the rules together, but can I still say that I want things put away?"

Justin smiled as he thought Brian did finally get what he was saying. "Sure, you can make a rule that things are put away and not left out. We don't have to call them rules but understandings are good too. The key here is that we both agree on the guidelines and that I have as much say in them as you do. I get that this is your place. You've lived here for a long time, but if I'm going to move in and share the space with you, I have to feel that this is my home too. I'm sorry."

"Sorry's bullshit. Just pick up your shit," Brian said, tired of the discussion and wanting their home to be back to its normally pristine level.

Brian sat down on the couch and pressed his forefinger and thumb to the bridge of his nose, hoping the pressure would relieve his headache.

"Can I get you anything?" Justin asked solicitously.

"Just clean up your mess," Brian said and he leaned his head on the back of the couch and closed his eyes.

Justin leaned down and gave him a quick kiss on the cheek and then in less than 5 minutes had everything back in its place. He smiled at how accurate Brian's estimates were and made a mental note to make sure and put things away in the future. He had no idea that Brian was so easily disturbed by things being out of place.

Justin went into the kitchen and started dinner while Brian rested. As Justin cooked dinner he reflected back on the day and the disagreement with Brian. Brian had been angry but once he told Justin what was wrong, it appeared that he calmed down pretty quickly. He hoped that meant that he and Brian could weather other disagreements in the future. He still had at least a month until he had to decide if he wanted to permanently move in or find his own place. He liked living with Brian but he wanted to be sure it was the right decision. If he said yes and things went south, he would have few options.

So far, it had been great, but as he had told Brian the other day, they were still in their honeymoon phase. No matter how much two people liked each other, living together was always a new challenge to the relationship. He'd seen couples fight over taking out the garbage and picking up the dry cleaning. He doubted he and Brian would ever fight over those chores since Brian had a service to do both, but today was an eye-opener. He knew Brian was a clean freak, but he didn't realize the extent of his obsession with everything having to be in its place.

He was certain he could put everything away as Brian asked, but the real question would be would he do it consistently? He was used to leaving things where they were and eventually putting things away. If he lived with Brian, that would need to change. He would always need to be sure that everything was put in its place. It seemed like a small thing but if today was any indication, anything out of place would spark Brian's anger. On the other hand, he didn't feel that Brian being a clean freak should be the deciding factor in his agreeing to move in. Their dinner was almost ready and he decided to not talk about this morning's "tornado" as Brian had called it and focus on their respective days.

They shared a quiet dinner and nothing more was said about the state of the loft.

Another few weeks passed and they had a few disagreements about Justin putting his things away. One time he had left three sketch pads out; one in the living room, one in the bedroom, and one on the table by the foyer. He had also left his pencils out and Brian found pencil shavings by the trash can where Justin had missed the can when he was sharpening them. Brian had reminded him that he needed to put his "crap" away and that pencil shavings on the floor were not acceptable. Justin had gathered his sketchbooks and placed them in his messenger bag and grabbed the broom and dustpan to clean up the shavings. As he was cleaning, he reminded himself that it only took 2 minutes to make Brian happy and he could do this.

One night at dinner as it was approaching the month mark, Brian decided to bring up Justin moving in permanently.

"How's the studio hunting going?" Brian asked, feeling that asking about the studio was a good indication of Justin's decision to continue their experiment.

"Okay, I guess. It's harder to find than I thought. The price of rent is pretty high and I've been working on crunching the numbers to see if I can swing it."

"What do you mean, swing it? If you're living here you won't have rent to pay," Brian asked.

"Just because I'm living with you doesn't mean I shouldn't pay rent. I need to pay my way too," Justin said, surprised at Brian's assumption that he would not be paying rent. "I know you invited me here to see if we wanted to live together but I always assumed that I would be contributing to the rent."

"Justin, there is no rent. The loft is paid for. All I pay for is utilities. I own the building and charge rent to the tenants. Their rent covers everything, even the parking garage monthly fees. Everyone pays for two spaces in the garage therefore your parking there would be included," Brian said, somewhat surprised that this topic had never come up.

"Oh. Well, then I should pay for a part of the cleaning service since my being here adds extra work for the service," Justin added, trying to quickly calculate his share of the cost.

"One extra person is not going to increase the cleaning service's tasks. They change the sheets, vacuum, clean the bathroom, dust and take out the trash. If the trash is full before they clean, I take it out," Brian explained.

"Okay, cleaning service already paid for. But I would, of course, pay my portion of the utilities. How much is that?"

"I have no idea. Ted pays the bills. Really Justin, I don't need someone to share expenses with. I'm not looking for a roommate. I asked you to move in so we could be together, not to help with the bills. So, barring the money issue, how is the hunt for a studio?"

"I don't want to be a kept man, Brian. I assumed that we were partners," Justin explained, hoping Brian would understand his point of view."

"We're dating, not married," Brian said, getting antsy about the discussion. "Look, I've got plenty of money. Even more now since I don't give Lindsay anything for Gus. You are just starting your career. I don't need your money. Spend your money on art supplies or some new clothes. You could use a good suit to wear for your openings," Brian said thinking that he would really enjoy taking Justin shopping. He quickly envisioned watching Justin try on pants and maybe even assisting him in the dressing room. He could feel his pants getting a little tight at the thought.

Justin thought about Brian's statement. "We've never really talked about money. I can't believe I haven't brought it up. Do you know that money is one of the biggest areas that people argue about in relationships? Other areas include sex, kids, careers, and chores."

Brian took a bite of his fish before responding. "Sex isn't a problem. We have sex practically every day. Gus is the only kid and we've never fought about him. I have no idea what fighting about careers would be about and while we don't exactly have chores, I do have to remind you frequently to pick up your shit." Brian shook his head as he thought of the disaster that Justin could leave in just a short time when he was getting ready in the morning. At least, he usually picked up after himself. "See, there isn't anything to argue about. You could take the money that you were planning on contributing and rent yourself a nice studio. Problem solved. You can give up your apartment and move in worry free."

Justin finished his risotto and drank some water. He could hear Brian's words but something about them made him uneasy. "It's not just that simple, Brian. I would still feel that I wasn't carrying my weight. It's important to me to feel equal and that means contributing to my living space."

Brian sighed. "It's only fucking money, Justin and I have plenty of it. You shouldn't worry about it. But if it will make you feel better, how about you buy the groceries? I swear I do not know where you put all the food that you eat and not gain an ounce. Will that make you more comfortable about paying your way?"

"Groceries? Yeah, I could do that. That way I could buy a bag of chips or cookies and you won't scowl at me when I put them in the basket. I love going grocery shopping, seeing all the fresh produce, and finding unique and different spices. I know you go shopping with Gus but I think you get in and out as quickly as possible. I think that works. I'll buy all the groceries and I'll pay when we go out to dinner."

"Whoa, who said anything about eating out? That can get really expensive. It could blow your budget right out of the water," Brian said, realizing that money could be an issue with Justin. He'd finished his dinner and pushed the plate away from him. "Look... Does it all have to be laid out item by item? I mean we are not a business with a profit goal. I think you are making this a lot more complicated than it has to be. Why don't you just buy the groceries and we can see where that leaves you?" Brian hoped his suggestion would end the discussion. It reminded him of the arguments that his parents had about money when he was growing up.

"Money is a really important topic, Brian. If I'm going to pay for the groceries as my only contribution to the household. I'd have more money than I thought for a studio and supplies. But I don't want to feel that all my money is going for my needs and your needs are not considered. I spend about $600 on groceries a month and another $250 on eating out. If I double that and add an extra $100 for feeding Gus, that would be about $2000. If I'm not paying rent and utilities, I can swing that amount and pay for a studio. I've looked at a few spaces but I guess I should have asked about how much I needed to contribute here. I was really reluctant to rent something. Also, I guess I was putting things off until I saw how things worked out with me moving in." Justin pushed his plate away and drank some water, finishing his glass of liquid. He took the pitcher from the middle of the table and poured more into his glass and drank about half of it before putting the glass down.

"You didn't think it would work .... Your moving in?" Brian asked, somewhat surprised. "Why would you move in if you didn't think it would work?"

"It's not exactly that I didn't think it would work, more like your question seemed pretty spontaneous and I wasn't sure if you would regret it. Brian, you've shared with me that you really had zero experience with relationships and I'm your first. You were perfectly content with your dating status until you met me. I'm pretty sure you had no idea what to expect from this." Justin said, waving his hand between the two of them. "Come on, did you expect to have to remind me to put my "shit away"?" Justin used air quotes as he said the words. "Did you think there wouldn't be disagreements or times that you wished I wasn't here and you could just chill by yourself? Moving in with someone is a huge step. It means the two people are more committed to each other. They've passed the initial dating interest and want to make a life together. It wasn't just about sex. Both of us had our reasons for wanting to move in together."

"And the verdict is?" Brian asked, finding the conversation a little disconcerting. He wasn't used to dissecting every part of his life.

"I don't regret it. If that is what you are asking? What do you think?" Justin asked, pleased that Brian and he were having this discussion. He found that discussions with Brian sometimes had to be handled with kid gloves. Brian often didn't see the need for talking about what might happen; he was still sometimes reactive rather than proactive. Justin knew that Brian's request for him to move in had been a spur-of-the-moment act and while he did not think that Brian regretted the decision, he thought it was time to check in. A decision about his living arrangements had to be made soon, and if he were to sign another year's lease at the apartment/studio, he needed to do it in the next week or so. If he needed to move out, he needed to have time to pack his stuff, find an apartment, and a studio as he wasn't certain that he could move back to the artist building. That would be an undertaking he was not looking forward to.

"I don't regret anything. I think that your PSAs and talking everything to death is still something I'm getting used to. I like it when you are here. That hasn't changed. Now, if you are done analyzing money and our relationship, I think we should clean up the dinner dishes and then we can find something more interesting to do. I could use some help in the shower," Brian said, raising his eyebrows and grinning.

"Oh, I think we can put the food away and leave the dishes," Justin suggested.

"Oh no, I don't like walking into a room with dirty dishes. It only takes a few minutes," Brian said.

"It only takes a few minutes," Justin said in unison with Brian.

They both laughed and Justin quickly put the food away while Brian placed the dishes in the dishwasher. Brian cleaned the pots and Justin wiped the counters, leaving a pristine kitchen, just to Brian's liking.

TBC