Justin was trying to cheer Brian up as much as he could. To make him smile, laugh and feel better... and most of all happy. He knew that their time together this weekend was coming to an end, but he didn't want to think about it. He didn't want the time they had left together to be sad, he can be sad later when Brian is really gone, but right now he just wanted them to have fun and enjoy their last hours as much as possible.
"What are you doing?" Brian asked amusedly when Justin suddenly lay down on top of him, just staring at him.
"I'm just looking at you," he smiled and kissed his bare chest. "And I'm enjoying your presence."
"Yeah, well," Brian looked at his watch and saw that he had about five hours before he had to go to the airport.
"Hey! Don't look at that... look at me. We still have time and we won't waste it by counting how much we have left. Okay?"
Brian laughed. He loved when Justin was bossy. "Okay. No looking at the clock. Got it."
"Thank you," this time Justin gently kissed his soft lips. "But I wanna do something."
"We can fuck," Brian grinned.
"We already did that. And don't get me wrong, I loved it, it was hot and fun and all... but now my ass is just sore and I would love to do something outside of this apartment. And don't say we can fuck in the street."
Brian couldn't help but laugh and then he pretended to zip his mouth. "And what do you want to do, dear?"
"I'm not sure..."
"Great start to your plan," Brian chuckled.
"We can start with a nice walk and maybe have something to eat..."
"You just love to eat, don't you?"
"Yeah. And maybe I'll eat your ass later as well," Justin winked at him.
"Can't wait."
"Bet you can't," Justin laughed. "But what do you think?"
"Well, nice walk, food... that almost sounds like a date."
"Well, we don't have to lable it, but yes, something like that. And we will just see where we end up."
"Okay."
"Really?" Justin smiled happily.
"Yeah. I think we deserve a nice date."
"Okay, Mr. I don't do dates. Let's do it," Justin was about to stand up. But Brian grabbed his hand and pulled him back. "What?"
"Kiss me first."
Justin smiled from ear to ear, then he leaned to his lips and gave him the best kiss he possibly could, leaving them both a little breathless.
----
They spent the next two hours forgetting about everything that just wasn't the way they wanted and only focused on each other, enjoying the rest of their time together. They ate the best burger and fries New York could offer. Not even Brian complained about the junk food. After that they had some drinks that improved their mood even more. And eventually they sat on a bench in the park with ice cream. The sunset was starting and the view was just beautiful. And yeah, as Brian would say, it was ridiculously romantic. But it was perfect.
Suddenly Brian started laughing.
"What?" Justin asked confused.
"You have that ice cream all over your mouth."
"Shit," Justin was ready to wipe his mouth with his hand, but Brian stopped him. "What now?"
"I have a better idea," with that Brian leaned towards him and kissed him passionately and deeply. Justin tasted perfect with that ice cream on his lips.
"Mhmhm. Ice cream kiss," Justin smiled broadly.
"Yeah, well, if i remember correctly, you loved it the first time."
"You remember it well," Justin grinned. "And you loved it too."
"It wasn't bad."
"Hey!" Justin punched him in the shoulder. "It was fucking hot."
Brian smirked, biting his lip. "Yeah, it was." And then Brian suddenly fell silent, lost in his thoughts.
"What is it?" Justin noticed.
"I was an asshole back then, huh?"
Justin opened his mouth a little. "No, you weren't."
"Yes, I was. I treated you like shit."
"You were just scared to be close to someone... scared to have your heart broken... so you tried to push me away. And I think you were just trying to protect me because you didn't want my heart to be broken as well... but being mean to me has never really worked."
Brian laughed and ran his fingers through Justin's hair. "Obviously. You're still here."
"Yeah. And trust me, I'm not going anywhere. Even if we are not in the same city, I am always with you... in here," Justin touched Brian's chest.
They just looked at each other lovingly for a while before they both started laughing.
"Who would have thought, right? You, me, the sunset, expresing our feelings..."
"It's almost like a romantic movie," Justin laughed. "Fucking hetero movie."
"Jesus Christ. What the hell happened to us?"
"No fucking idea. But whatever it was, it made us crazy... crazy in love with each other," Justin bit his lip and just stared at him for a moment before saying: "I really love you, Brian, so much."
Brian sighed and pressed his forehead against Justin's. "I really love you too, Justin."
They kissed again, but this time more gently and slowly. And then Justin rested his head on Brian's shoulder while Brian put his arm around him. They sat there like that for a while. No words were needed, just being together was enough.
----
When they got back to Justin's appartment, they knew they could no longer ignore the clock, because now the time was really ticking.
"Don't forget this t-shirt," Justin handed it to Brian so he could pack it.
"Thanks. That's my favorite."
"Yeah, I know. Mine too. I love it when you wear it."
"But of course you love more when I'm not wearing any," Brian smirked and put his tongue in his cheek.
"Of course," Justin laughed.
"Thought so. But if you want, I can leave the t-shirt here for you."
"What?"
"Yeah, you can sleep in it or something... so you can feel closer to me, you know," Brian laughed, pretending to be joking. But he meant it.
"Okay," Justin immediately grabbed that t-shirt and put it to his nose, inhaling Brian's scent.
"You're not even gonna wash it, right?"
"Absolutely not."
Brian laughed. "Don't you want my underwear, too?"
"Sure!"
Brian raised his eyebrows in disbelief.
"That was a joke!"
"Are you sure? I can just take them off..."
"Shut up," Justin rolled his eyes and laughed, then silenced him with a kiss.
"You are so ungrateful."
"Well, I guess you should probably spank me."
"Yeah, I should, definitely..." Brian wrapped his arms around him and they stood together, holding each other closely with their foreheads touching. "But next time, okay?"
Justin sighed and smiled sadly before kissing him again. "I'm looking forward to it."
"Yeah, me too, Sunshine."
Brian was finishing packing the rest of his stuff while Justin watched him from the bed. He knew he will see him soon. Nothing else was even an option. But it was still hard. The thought of not sleeping in Brian's arms tonight was unbearable. He didn't want him to go. But he couldn't ask him to stay. And he couldn't go with him. He could only wait and hope for the best.
"Everything packed?" Justin asked as Brian sat down on the bed next to him.
"Yeah. Except for one thing."
"I promise I'll take good care of that t-shirt, don't worry," Justin chuckled.
"Thanks. But I meant you."
"Oh..."
"But you wouldn't fit in that suitcase anyway, so..."
"Brian," Justin ran his hand down Brian's arm, his face was a little worried.
"That was my failed attempt to be funny. I'm fine, Justin, I promise."
"But I'm not..."
"What?"
"I'm not fine. Because you're leaving and I'm gonna miss you terribly. I know I've decided to stay here, but that doesn't mean it's not hard for me. And I know it's hard for you too. And we shouldn't pretend that we're okay when we're not."
Brian sighed and moved closer to him. "You're right. I'm not fine. But like you said we'll see each other very soon. And that's what makes it a little easier for me."
"I wish I could just jump into the future, to skip the time we're apart."
Brian laughed a little, "We would get sick of each other."
Justin put a finger on Brian's lips. "I already told you, I could never be sick of you."
Brian gently stroked his cheek. "I promise I'll be here as soon as I can."
"Or I'll come to you."
It was an easy promise that both of them wanted to keep. But they weren't naive... their future will be difficult... sometimes they will even hate it and want to give up... but they won't. Because no matter how hard it will be, what they have is much stronger than that.
----
One hour. That was all they had left. Most of the time they were quiet, just laying on bed together, holding each other real tightly. And when they talked, they were joking and planning what they will do next time they see each other. But the closer it was, the more Justin could feel his eyes filling with tears. But he was doing his best not cry. That was the last thing he needed right now.
But suddenly Justin's phone rang and he immediately looked who texted him, but didn't say a word, he just put the phone back on the nightstand and rested his head on Brian's chest again. He loved the sound of Brian's heart.
"Who texted you?" Brian asked curiously.
"It doesn't matter."
"Mark?" Justin didn't answer, but he didn't even have to, Brian just knew. "What did he text?"
"He's asking if I have time to get some drinks tonight."
Of course he's asking, Brian thought, annoyed. He probably thinks that Brian's already gone.
"Oh."
"I won't go."
"Why not?"
"Because I'm not in the mood to go out..."
"You can't stay locked in your apartment, Sunshine."
Justin raised his head and looked at Brian. "You don't even like Mark."
Brian laughed. "Well, that's true, I don't. But if you say he's just a friend, then it shouldn't be a problem, right?"
"He is just a friend! I promise."
"I know, Justin. And I also know that you need friends and you need to go out and live your best life... even if it means spending time with him."
Justin smiled and kissed him. "Thank you for trusting me."
"Well, trusting you isn't a problem... I don't trust him... so if he ever tries anything again, just hit him in the face for me, okay?"
Justin laughed and nodded. "He won't. I'll make sure of that. He just needs to understand that it's never gonna happen between us and then he'll be okay."
"I hope so."
"I know so."
"Smartass," Brian laughed and kissed him on the head.
----
The hardest moment was when they had to come to terms with the fact that it was time to go to the airport. Neither of them wanted to go to the car, but unfortunately they had to face the reality. So when they actually sat in the car, both of them were quiet the whole time. Only their hearts were beating so fast that it almost felt like they were about to jump out of their chests. Fuck, they really hated this.
So to actually stand at the airport was killing them.
"Thank you, Brian, for this weekend. It was really perfect."
"It was," Brian smiled. "But it's Mr. Kinney," he bit his lip.
Justin chuckled. "Oh, right, sorry, Mr. Kinney. I hope you were happy with me services."
"I most definitely was."
"Well, it was my pleasure, Mr. Kinney," he licked his lips.
"I bet it was. But there is one more thing I need from you."
"Anything."
Brian smiled and pulled Justin closer, wrapping his arms around him and then he kissed him. Hard, deep, like he was starving for him. He wanted to make sure Justin will feel him and taste him on his lips and tongue as long as possible. It was almost as if they couldn't breath and they were each other's air.
"Um, wow," Justin breathed out heavily. "That was... uhm..."
"Hard?" Brian raised his eyebrow as he felt Justin was in fact hard.
"Uh-mhmmm," he smiled and was all red.
"Good. At least you have something to think about."
"Yeah..."
They both laughed and kissed again. But then it was time to do what needed to be done.
"God, I'm gonna miss you so much," Justin whispered.
"I'm gonna miss you too."
"Just call me when you get home, okay?"
"For a dirty talk? You just can't get enough of me, can you?"
"Obviously not." Justin laughed, "But I'm gonna be okay with just hearing your voice."
Brian smiled and ran a finger down Justin's cheek. "Okay. I'll call you. I promise."
They were both so strong for each other and did their best not to fall apart. But they knew they will see each other again soon, and that was all that mattered.
"I should go..." Brian sighed.
"Yeah, I know, you don't want to miss your flight."
"Part of me does..."
"I know, I feel the same way. But waiting for the next flight wouldn't change anything... it would still be this hard."
Brian nodded in agreement. And then he hugged him as tightly as possible and kissed his neck. "See you soon, Sunshine..." he whispered to his ear.
Brian then smiled at him one last time with a lump in his throat, trying to fight back tears. Then he turned around and began to walk away, fighting the urge to look back at Justin once more. He knew that if he did that, he wouldn't be able to get on that plane.
But what happened next took Brian completely by surprise...
"Marry me, Brian!"
It took him a few seconds to even realize he heard Justin, but to actually understand what he said was a lot harder. He turned back to face Justin, who was smiling from ear to ear, and started walking toward him.
"What? What did you just say?"
"I said marry me."
"Are you crazy?" Brian laughed, but was in shock.
"Maybe. Yes. I don't know. But I don't see why not. I know the reason we canceled it before was that we didn't want to sacrifice our lives... but that's just bullshit now. We love each other, we're together and I think we're ready. Yeah, lets face it we don't even know when we're gonna see each other again... but I want to spend the rest of my life with you, whether we're right next to each other or a hundred miles apart because I love you, Brian... and I really wanna marry you. I just need to know that you are mine forever."
Brian was completely taken aback, he was sure he's just dreaming. "Justin, this is... I mean... I just..."
"Just think about it, okay? You don't have to answer me now, that's okay... but think about it," he smiled nervously.
Brian opened his mouth but he couldn't find any words. He even forgot to breath. It was crazy. But somehow it was the best thing he had heard in a long time. So he smiled and ran his fingers through Justin's hair...
"I don't have to think about it, Justin... I know the answer now..."
"And?"
Brian took a deep breath and said: "Okay."
"Okay?" Justin raised his eyebrows.
"Let's do it," he smiled.
Justin bit his lip to keep himself from smiling. "I'm gonna need you to say it."
Brian laughed and leaned to his ear, then he whispered: "Yes... a million times yes."
The smile on Justin's lips was the brightest Brian had ever seen. They immediately kissed and for a moment they forgot about the world around them. They were happy, and even the fact that they won't sleep in the same bed tonight couldn't change that.